Hi everyone, it's me (Mr Tea poster) here with another of my alt accounts
FYI I am also mongychops and dozer

It feels good to finally get this off my chest
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 8 May 2024, 16:12, archived)

It's all our chest, m8. Just one massive chest.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 8 May 2024, 16:23, archived)

Haha, boobs!

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 8 May 2024, 17:12, archived)

You see I'm always good for a laugh
At my expense of course
(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Wed 8 May 2024, 16:51, archived)

your rent is going up

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Wed 8 May 2024, 17:04, archived)

Ok

(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Wed 8 May 2024, 17:31, archived)

I probably shouldn't have bothered logging out as queef to log in as sticklebricks
just to type this reply, especially as I've got all these scottish prescriptions to fill, while I'm fishing in France and selling things on a market stall in London.

I'm also Gonz,I just shit myself and carnnt spel
(piss and shit, Wed 8 May 2024, 17:15, archived)

i miss gonz, i'm glad you're back

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Wed 8 May 2024, 17:27, archived)

He just got his driving licence

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 8 May 2024, 19:34, archived)

alright

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 8 May 2024, 17:28, archived)

RIP Steve Albini :'(

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 8 May 2024, 17:37, archived)

Steve Albony

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 8 May 2024, 17:42, archived)

Steve Albindun

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 8 May 2024, 17:43, archived)

Stiff Albini
fyh
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 8 May 2024, 17:44, archived)

Steve AIistooloweffortforevenus

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 8 May 2024, 17:48, archived)

At Inaction Park

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 8 May 2024, 17:49, archived)

Lol he was shit

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 8 May 2024, 17:51, archived)

What a stupid fucking wanker
leorgalil.com/2010/01/20/steve-albini-vs-sampling/
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 8 May 2024, 17:53, archived)

I might sample myself having a wank at his funeral

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 8 May 2024, 17:54, archived)

Never knew he produced Pigface until today

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 8 May 2024, 18:37, archived)

afternoon

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 8 May 2024, 13:42, archived)

b3p3d3

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 8 May 2024, 13:47, archived)

Alright, 'Mr. Tea'.

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 8 May 2024, 13:49, archived)

WRONG ACCOUNT

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 8 May 2024, 14:08, archived)

Bou really is a cretinous spazwit

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 8 May 2024, 14:09, archived)

Glad to see that I'm still obsessed with her, innit

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 8 May 2024, 14:12, archived)

I was at an investment presentation today, delivered by Schroders.
Bou was one of the presenters.
(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 8 May 2024, 14:13, archived)

I'm not clicking this until I know the cat's OK.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 8 May 2024, 14:14, archived)

It was still in the box when I left.

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 8 May 2024, 14:15, archived)

This is still a thing then is it, fuck that

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 8 May 2024, 14:18, archived)

With podka dots on

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 8 May 2024, 14:19, archived)

Proof that if you ignore a problem, it doesn't go away

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 8 May 2024, 14:24, archived)

It does if it gets trampled by a massive herd of wildebeest

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 8 May 2024, 14:31, archived)

here they come
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 8 May 2024, 15:28, archived)

it did for me :)

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 8 May 2024, 15:27, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8411721
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 8 May 2024, 13:50, archived)

In a way, aren't we *all* Mr. Tea?

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 8 May 2024, 13:58, archived)

I'm not!

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 8 May 2024, 14:23, archived)

arseboon dilbaro is

(arseboon dilbaro arseboon dilbaro, Wed 8 May 2024, 14:32, archived)

Well that's true, I suppose.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 8 May 2024, 14:33, archived)

we know, we know, m8, you're Porcupine from Purgatory

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 8 May 2024, 14:46, archived)

ait

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 8 May 2024, 13:57, archived)

So Mr. Tea is Porcupine from Purgatory
Nice one
Not
(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Wed 8 May 2024, 9:48, archived)

Fuck you

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 8 May 2024, 10:35, archived)

Well said

( mongychops, Wed 8 May 2024, 10:39, archived)

Sshh

(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Wed 8 May 2024, 11:09, archived)

Its true

(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Wed 8 May 2024, 11:06, archived)

It isn't you twat

( mongychops, Wed 8 May 2024, 11:10, archived)

Hush

(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Wed 8 May 2024, 12:02, archived)

They are 2 different people. Why don't you fuck off again. Nobody wants your level of mental shitness

( mongychops, Wed 8 May 2024, 12:06, archived)

How do you know?
Have you met them both?
(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Wed 8 May 2024, 13:28, archived)

Eh?
Are you off your meds, or something?
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 8 May 2024, 12:45, archived)

Fuck you

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 8 May 2024, 13:17, archived)

Sorry, wrong account

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 8 May 2024, 13:17, archived)

I can help

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 8 May 2024, 13:23, archived)

With an injection of pentobarbital I hope

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 8 May 2024, 13:25, archived)

We do actually have all the ingredients for a Brompton Cocktail to hand here, wonder when anyone last made it.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 8 May 2024, 13:33, archived)

Does this involve ENVOLVING or pointing at chickens?

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 8 May 2024, 14:06, archived)

Yep
Don't bother denying it
(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Wed 8 May 2024, 14:05, archived)

Right now you're wondering how I know
Heh heh
(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Wed 8 May 2024, 14:11, archived)

Why do you keep coming back here?
You don't fit in, you never have, nobody really likes you, and you're not even the occasionally entertaining kind of crazy like baldmonkey was.
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 8 May 2024, 14:34, archived)

LOL do you think anyone here 'fits in'?

( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Wed 8 May 2024, 14:46, archived)

We're all a bunch of misfits fitting in
With something
(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Wed 8 May 2024, 14:50, archived)

Come on though, you blatantly know what I mean.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 8 May 2024, 14:53, archived)

I don't really care to be honest
It's amusing how you've gotten all wound up over this
(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Wed 8 May 2024, 15:00, archived)

Hahaha, yes Bou, I'm the one here's who "wound up."
It's definitely me that's repeatedly had online mental breakdowns here, stalked other users, etc. etc.
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 8 May 2024, 15:29, archived)

No seriously
You're upset now
Sorry
(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Wed 8 May 2024, 15:34, archived)

Well now you're just hurting my feelings...

(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Wed 8 May 2024, 14:47, archived)

Do you come here to be liked and to fit in?
Oh.
(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Wed 8 May 2024, 14:49, archived)

Believe it or not
a certain number of people do. It's nuts.

I like to argue, some people can't do it very well and unwittingly reveal all kinds of stuff about themselves, and a common theme among those losing their minds is the presumption that everyone who comes here wants friendly companionship and respect. Utterly bizarre, given the toxic culture here.
( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Wed 8 May 2024, 18:07, archived)

Oh yes I forgot,
you're a world-renowned expert in the inner lives and motivations of everyone else on the planet. Despite having the self-awareness of a lobotomised goldfish.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 8 May 2024, 19:27, archived)

Fuck you
You inflated blimp
(PORCY, Thu 9 May 2024, 10:52, archived)

Which one are you again?

( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Thu 9 May 2024, 14:28, archived)

Well said

(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Thu 9 May 2024, 2:43, archived)

User PORCY is me.
I hope porcy sees it
Asshole
(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Thu 9 May 2024, 10:56, archived)

Please stop creating alts
and please stop trying to talk to people ignoring you. It's creepy. Cheers.
( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Thu 9 May 2024, 14:33, archived)

morning

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 8 May 2024, 7:11, archived)

morning

( broadsword, Wed 8 May 2024, 7:50, archived)

morning

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 8 May 2024, 8:00, archived)

Fuck you, beepeedee. Fuck you.

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 8 May 2024, 8:16, archived)

morning

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 8 May 2024, 8:54, archived)

Hi-de-hi xx

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Wed 8 May 2024, 9:44, archived)

fuck off brb

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Tue 7 May 2024, 21:39, archived)

You would say that

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 8 May 2024, 0:59, archived)

＼(｀0´)／ ʕ•̫͡•ʕ̫͡ʕ•͓͡•ʔ-̫͡-ʕ•̫͡•ʔ̫͡ʔ-̫͡-ʔ ☜(ﾟヮﾟ☜)

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 8 May 2024, 1:10, archived)

Not very nice

(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Wed 8 May 2024, 7:39, archived)

"There are over 60 types of sphincter in the human body."
It doesn't say exactly how many. How many do you reckon you have?
( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Tue 7 May 2024, 20:43, archived)

69, dude!

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 7 May 2024, 21:19, archived)

Acceptable.
You could have also gone with over 9000.
( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Tue 7 May 2024, 23:14, archived)

iunderstoodthatreference.gif

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 8 May 2024, 12:45, archived)

a sphincter says what?

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 8 May 2024, 0:20, archived)

I only know of the anal one
Oops
(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Wed 8 May 2024, 7:40, archived)

i haven't said willies for a while so
WILLIES!
( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Tue 7 May 2024, 17:41, archived)

This is exactly the witty, erudite content I keep coming back here for.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 7 May 2024, 17:52, archived)

you can count on me

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Tue 7 May 2024, 17:56, archived)

tt ll
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 7 May 2024, 18:16, archived)

bravo!

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Tue 7 May 2024, 18:30, archived)

He'

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 7 May 2024, 19:13, archived)

So you are Porcupine from Purgatory
Nice one
Not
(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Wed 8 May 2024, 9:46, archived)

You would say that

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Tue 7 May 2024, 18:34, archived)

sometimes i say cocks
not often tho
( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Tue 7 May 2024, 18:35, archived)

So you often have cocks leaving your mouth?

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Tue 7 May 2024, 18:37, archived)

cocks, willies, all sorts really

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Tue 7 May 2024, 18:39, archived)

I just had a curry with cumin.
It wasn't very nice.
(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Tue 7 May 2024, 18:40, archived)

hard to take it out once it's in
try saying NO, see how far that gets you
( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Tue 7 May 2024, 18:54, archived)

+

(piss and shit, Tue 7 May 2024, 19:44, archived)

Pænii

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 7 May 2024, 19:44, archived)

don't mind if i do

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Tue 7 May 2024, 19:50, archived)

www2.b3ta.com/host/creative/10342/1715111630/IMG4419.jpeg
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 7 May 2024, 20:54, archived)

black hole love
no, not that one, this one
( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Tue 7 May 2024, 21:00, archived)

when you feel unhappy, this might be why

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 7 May 2024, 22:14, archived)

Well I've cooked the last of my French sausage. Still got some cheese left, if only I knew where to get more artisan cheese.

( mongychops, Tue 7 May 2024, 21:04, archived)

i don't even know what artisan cheese is
do you mean WILLIES? i mean sausages?
( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Tue 7 May 2024, 21:05, archived)

Google translate will help, French to English

( mongychops, Tue 7 May 2024, 21:07, archived)

i get lost in there, french to english, english to samoan, samoan to somali, somali to oromo
and suddenly i've made a wonderfully authentic spit roasted courgette
( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Tue 7 May 2024, 21:12, archived)

Fuck of
not really, shit of
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 7 May 2024, 13:15, archived)

Hi

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Tue 7 May 2024, 13:29, archived)

just ordered a new exercise bike
how about THAT
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 7 May 2024, 13:31, archived)

Gay.

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Tue 7 May 2024, 13:43, archived)

I have a 32" waist and all my own hair

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 7 May 2024, 13:53, archived)

Your partner is an accountant.

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Tue 7 May 2024, 13:56, archived)

I have 32" hair and all my own waist and my partner is an auditor

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 7 May 2024, 13:58, archived)

Where do you keep all your own hair?
Bath plughole?
Afro comb?
A box?
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Tue 7 May 2024, 14:25, archived)

around my anus
it's very lustrous, if you can overlook the chronic, matted, reeking clag
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 7 May 2024, 14:44, archived)

I've just found out the department my partner works at will start treating children
I'm not sure how this is going to go down with him. He sometimes says how affecting it is giving radiotherapy to young people, you know, someone in their 20s or 30s with a short time to live. When he's got to do that for little kids... good god. He's sometimes said he doesn't know how he could ever manage treating children. It ain't gonna be easy. Poor sod.
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Tue 7 May 2024, 14:41, archived)

man, fuck that
I couldn't cope with that at all
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 7 May 2024, 14:45, archived)

fuuuuuuuuuuuuck
I could never do that
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Tue 7 May 2024, 14:54, archived)

I worked one summer in a ward for children with serious and/or fatal illnesses, they asked me to come back but I was totally fucked up by it

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 7 May 2024, 15:03, archived)

so were they

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Tue 7 May 2024, 20:25, archived)

not by me, it was MJ, one of the kids had seen him in a ward at some point and told me "his face was like a mask"

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 7 May 2024, 20:43, archived)

just bought a large bag of squid
I like squid.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Tue 7 May 2024, 14:53, archived)

I have taken to buying it frozen from the Indians
vg value and it's texturally fine once defrosted
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 7 May 2024, 14:54, archived)

this is frozen
£7.99 from Lidl, should do me a few meals
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Tue 7 May 2024, 14:56, archived)

I always plan to do something different with it, but every time it ends up as szechuan salt and pepper squid

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 7 May 2024, 15:01, archived)

I either put it in pho
or marinate it in extra virgin olive oil, garlic, chillies and a bit of ginger, then flash fry it and chuck it in a salad
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Tue 7 May 2024, 15:04, archived)

have you ever used those pho stock cubes you can get in the Asian supermarkets?
really not bad at all for the price, especially if you go mad with the fresh mint etc
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 7 May 2024, 15:11, archived)

no, I'll have to keep a look out for them

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Tue 7 May 2024, 15:13, archived)

these are they
www.orientalmart.co.uk/bao-long-pho-beef-soup-seasoning
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 7 May 2024, 15:39, archived)

Nice

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Tue 7 May 2024, 16:12, archived)

If you keep it in a tupperware in the freezer then you can indeed put the lid back on the squid.

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Tue 7 May 2024, 16:16, archived)

don't be a flid
you act like a kid
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 7 May 2024, 16:59, archived)

I keep mine up the japper and for others I charge a quid

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Tue 7 May 2024, 17:06, archived)

easy now

( $$ ✅, Tue 7 May 2024, 17:05, archived)

sup rasta

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 7 May 2024, 18:16, archived)

morning

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Tue 7 May 2024, 7:59, archived)

Fuck you, beepeedee. Fuck you.

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 7 May 2024, 8:01, archived)

He does stomp a bit tbh
Bit rude really
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Tue 7 May 2024, 8:07, archived)

Not nearly rude enough

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 7 May 2024, 9:14, archived)

Not sure a 10 hour gap is stomping but ok

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Tue 7 May 2024, 9:45, archived)

Morning
upset stomach today. Got a bit of a fever too. All-in-all not feeling great.
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Tue 7 May 2024, 9:41, archived)

You need to see your local leech merchant

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Tue 7 May 2024, 11:18, archived)

My humors may be out of balance
it's true
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Tue 7 May 2024, 11:40, archived)

I swear we had a patient who is a veterinarian reiki master
Dunno how that goes
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Tue 7 May 2024, 13:17, archived)

Cheers

( $$ ✅, Tue 7 May 2024, 12:53, archived)

RIP

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Tue 7 May 2024, 12:55, archived)

ARSEHOLE

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Mon 6 May 2024, 22:23, archived)

*dons gloves and reaches for KY*

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Tue 7 May 2024, 1:05, archived)

No, I think I'll be nice today

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Tue 7 May 2024, 6:21, archived)

No thanks, I've just eaten.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 7 May 2024, 7:29, archived)

Eurovision this week Mr H
Excited?
Plans?
Betting tips?
Sadly the missus loves it :(((
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Tue 7 May 2024, 7:55, archived)

Daz! Your time to shine!

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 7 May 2024, 20:45, archived)

hi gunt's
having a nice day? I'm at work but I don't mind
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 6 May 2024, 14:13, archived)

Y

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Mon 6 May 2024, 14:18, archived)

Wonderful thank you

(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Mon 6 May 2024, 14:35, archived)

you babysit! ha ha haha ha ha!

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Mon 6 May 2024, 14:44, archived)

my ex used to say that. *sads*
( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Mon 6 May 2024, 14:45, archived)

man up you fucking poofter! *SLAPS*

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Mon 6 May 2024, 14:59, archived)

Everybody say.
When you hear the call you got to get it underway.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Mon 6 May 2024, 15:06, archived)

Man up dude
Watch some Danny Dyer or Stephen Segal
Better still Chuck Norris, real men xx
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Mon 6 May 2024, 15:59, archived)

not too bad
blitzed the kitchen, put a wash on, came to my parents' house and helped them with their cleaning and I have just convinced them to watch jurassic world fallen kingdom, which they are enjoying because people get eaten
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 6 May 2024, 15:38, archived)

candle bollocks

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Tue 7 May 2024, 3:16, archived)

Happy candles!

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 7 May 2024, 9:47, archived)

Yes thank you sweetie how splendid of yew to ask
Pigging out and snoozing
Done any good guffs recently?
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Mon 6 May 2024, 15:56, archived)

Christ, the standard of chat here really has gone through the fucking floor.
An endless succession of thick lolwaki cunts trying to out-dull each other. Might flounce 5eva.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Mon 6 May 2024, 16:23, archived)

alright

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Mon 6 May 2024, 16:41, archived)

Do a flip

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Mon 6 May 2024, 16:47, archived)

youtube.com/shorts/YTW9FZV_ptg?si=2YAvmtIBQF5vsVIA
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Mon 6 May 2024, 17:02, archived)

I blame myself.
The rot set in when I stopped saying 'alright' and then asking everyone to name their favourite transuranic element. :(
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 6 May 2024, 19:51, archived)

no, not true, your alt game is flawless

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 6 May 2024, 21:57, archived)

But I have slacked off it lately. :(

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 7 May 2024, 9:47, archived)

I've got loads of jokes about unemployed people but none of them work.

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Mon 6 May 2024, 17:39, archived)

i don't get it
a job, i mean
( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Mon 6 May 2024, 17:58, archived)

One of my formage if very sharp, alright but I wouldn't by it again. Hope that helps with stocking

( mongychops, Mon 6 May 2024, 19:39, archived)

Well your lack of engagement with a future fomage purchaser makes me think

( mongychops, Mon 6 May 2024, 21:36, archived)

it's a disgrace

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 6 May 2024, 21:57, archived)

Clown posse pushing that knobling down the board
Stares
Tap tappity tap
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Mon 6 May 2024, 9:13, archived)

I fucking hate clowns

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Mon 6 May 2024, 9:16, archived)

They are weird and creepy
How about clown morris dancers?
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Mon 6 May 2024, 9:19, archived)

I'm not too fond of Morris dancers, either
All weird fertility rites with added bells and hankies. Sexual morrisment.
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Mon 6 May 2024, 9:32, archived)

My Dad's a morris dancer.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Mon 6 May 2024, 11:43, archived)

Why?

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Mon 6 May 2024, 12:26, archived)

he's a private morris dancer, he dances for money

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Mon 6 May 2024, 12:47, archived)

Ym does
I put a fiver down her knickers for a 'special' dance
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Mon 6 May 2024, 12:50, archived)

i bet she got your bells jingling

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Mon 6 May 2024, 13:10, archived)

Danced right round his maypole

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Mon 6 May 2024, 13:37, archived)

His own sexual gratification.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Mon 6 May 2024, 15:01, archived)

hold me closer morris dancer

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 6 May 2024, 21:58, archived)

Me too. Evil grimacing and not funny

(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Mon 6 May 2024, 9:20, archived)

/talk?

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Mon 6 May 2024, 10:36, archived)

grin mist

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Mon 6 May 2024, 13:11, archived)

morning

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Mon 6 May 2024, 8:59, archived)

Fuck you, beepeedee. Fuck you.

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Mon 6 May 2024, 9:07, archived)

You fucking stupid fucking cunts

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Mon 6 May 2024, 0:55, archived)

my ears were burning

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Mon 6 May 2024, 4:50, archived)

And a good morning to you, too

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Mon 6 May 2024, 8:26, archived)

Morning all
Happy May Day
Fancy a Morris Dance or some maypole fun?
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Mon 6 May 2024, 8:30, archived)

www.khawlaartandculture.com/artist/91
( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Mon 6 May 2024, 8:32, archived)

Arseboon's younger brother innit

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Mon 6 May 2024, 8:38, archived)

If you search for him on wikipedia
the 1st result is MBS and the 2nd result is Louis Farrakhan.
( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Mon 6 May 2024, 15:34, archived)

Clown

(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Mon 6 May 2024, 8:49, archived)

Tap, tap, tap

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Mon 6 May 2024, 9:06, archived)

desperados. delicious. I'm going out. i may be some time.

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Sun 5 May 2024, 17:21, archived)

You going to the special secret bash for the cool kids?

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Sun 5 May 2024, 17:24, archived)

i wasn't invited.
I'm going to smoke some banana skins and set some bins alight
( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Sun 5 May 2024, 17:29, archived)

That is the special secret bash
\○/
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Sun 5 May 2024, 18:26, archived)

I dislike beer

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 5 May 2024, 18:08, archived)

is that that shit lager with tequila in it?
grim
(piss and shit, Sun 5 May 2024, 20:33, archived)

It's well named, though, because you'd have to be absolutely desperate for booze, with literally nothing else available, to consider drinking it.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sun 5 May 2024, 21:30, archived)

tequila mockingbird

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 5 May 2024, 21:48, archived)

That pun was rather whisky.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sun 5 May 2024, 23:06, archived)

*something about clarity*
you can do the rest
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 6 May 2024, 0:42, archived)

I quite like it

(Agent Pr1ck llǝɯs ǝɥʇ sʇI ˙ǝɔɐld sᴉɥʇ ǝʇɐɥ l, Sun 5 May 2024, 23:40, archived)

me too

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Mon 6 May 2024, 4:52, archived)

I'm more into americanos
blue jeans and chinos
( $$ ✅, Sun 5 May 2024, 20:56, archived)

Thanks for the earworm

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sun 5 May 2024, 21:09, archived)

Yes :(

(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Mon 6 May 2024, 8:50, archived)

 ▄▄▄▄    ▒█████   ██▓     ██▓     ▒█████   ▄████▄   ██ ▄█▀  ██████ 
▓█████▄ ▒██▒  ██▒▓██▒    ▓██▒    ▒██▒  ██▒▒██▀ ▀█   ██▄█▒ ▒██    ▒ 
▒██▒ ▄██▒██░  ██▒▒██░    ▒██░    ▒██░  ██▒▒▓█    ▄ ▓███▄░ ░ ▓██▄   
▒██░█▀  ▒██   ██░▒██░    ▒██░    ▒██   ██░▒▓▓▄ ▄██▒▓██ █▄   ▒   ██▒
░▓█  ▀█▓░ ████▓▒░░██████▒░██████▒░ ████▓▒░▒ ▓███▀ ░▒██▒ █▄▒██████▒▒
░▒▓███▀▒░ ▒░▒░▒░ ░ ▒░▓  ░░ ▒░▓  ░░ ▒░▒░▒░ ░ ░▒ ▒  ░▒ ▒▒ ▓▒▒ ▒▓▒ ▒ ░
▒░▒   ░   ░ ▒ ▒░ ░ ░ ▒  ░░ ░ ▒  ░  ░ ▒ ▒░   ░  ▒   ░ ░▒ ▒░░ ░▒  ░ ░
 ░    ░ ░ ░ ░ ▒    ░ ░     ░ ░   ░ ░ ░ ▒  ░        ░ ░░ ░ ░  ░  ░  
 ░          ░ ░      ░  ░    ░  ░    ░ ░  ░ ░      ░  ░         ░  
      ░                                   ░                        

( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Sun 5 May 2024, 17:06, archived)

Yeah that worked.

( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Sun 5 May 2024, 17:06, archived)

what the fuck?

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 5 May 2024, 17:11, archived)

Think it's Klingon

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Sun 5 May 2024, 17:23, archived)

⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛🟥🟥🟥🟥🟥⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
⬛⬛⬛⬛🟥🟥🟥🟥🟥🟥🟥🟥🟥⬛⬛⬛
⬛⬛⬛⬛🟫🟫🟫🟨🟨⬛🟨⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
⬛⬛⬛🟫🟨🟫🟨🟨🟨⬛🟨🟨🟨⬛⬛⬛
⬛⬛⬛🟫🟨🟫🟫🟨🟨🟨🟫🟨🟨🟨⬛⬛
⬛⬛⬛🟫🟫🟨🟨🟨🟨🟫🟫🟫🟫⬛⬛⬛
⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛🟨🟨🟨🟨🟨🟨🟨⬛⬛⬛⬛
⬛⬛⬛⬛🟥🟥🟦🟥🟥🟦🟥⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
⬛⬛⬛🟥🟥🟥🟦🟥🟥🟦🟥🟥🟥⬛⬛⬛
⬛⬛🟥🟥🟥🟥🟦🟦🟦🟦🟥🟥🟥🟥⬛⬛
⬛⬛⬜⬜🟥🟦🟨🟦🟦🟨🟦🟥⬜⬜⬛⬛
⬛⬛⬜⬜⬜🟦🟦🟦🟦🟦🟦⬜⬜⬜⬛⬛
⬛⬛⬜⬜🟦🟦🟦⬛⬛🟦🟦🟦⬜⬜⬛⬛
⬛⬛⬛⬛🟦🟦🟦⬛⬛🟦🟦🟦⬛⬛⬛⬛
⬛⬛⬛🟫🟫🟫⬛⬛⬛⬛🟫🟫🟫⬛⬛⬛
⬛⬛🟫🟫🟫🟫⬛⬛⬛⬛🟫🟫🟫🟫⬛⬛
( $$ ✅, Sun 5 May 2024, 17:19, archived)

Posting a picture? STOP!

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Sun 5 May 2024, 17:36, archived)

ßollocks?
Nazi
(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Mon 6 May 2024, 8:52, archived)

Aren't you Afrikaans?
What the fuck have you got against a sharp S?
( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Mon 6 May 2024, 15:27, archived)

morning

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Sun 5 May 2024, 9:10, archived)

is it though?

( djrich - Live from Houghton Regis too rass, Sun 5 May 2024, 9:29, archived)

Rich.

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Sun 5 May 2024, 9:32, archived)

Certainly am

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Sun 5 May 2024, 10:54, archived)

Nods

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Sun 5 May 2024, 10:53, archived)

Bernard UNDERHILL

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Sun 5 May 2024, 15:38, archived)

Bernard KILLED

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Sun 5 May 2024, 15:45, archived)

bURNard

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Sun 5 May 2024, 15:52, archived)

Theodead.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Sun 5 May 2024, 16:06, archived)

Lord of the Deadermark

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Sun 5 May 2024, 16:52, archived)

Was he a Hobbit?

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Sun 5 May 2024, 15:55, archived)

you fucking stupid fucking cunt

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Sun 5 May 2024, 16:17, archived)

Bernard Ill

(piss and shit, Sun 5 May 2024, 20:33, archived)

Today Matthew I will be doing bugger all till Wednesday
What productive/interesting ways are you spending the wank holiday?
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Sun 5 May 2024, 7:17, archived)

Finishing off 2 blankets today
Giving the house a good clean tomorrow. Might do some laundry.
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sun 5 May 2024, 7:46, archived)

Finishing a blanket?

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Sun 5 May 2024, 7:53, archived)

2 of them
One for the baby and the other for donation
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sun 5 May 2024, 7:54, archived)

Is that knitting?

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Sun 5 May 2024, 7:55, archived)

Yes
I love knitting and making blankets is how I relax. I have far more than I need, so a few years ago, I decided that I would use my spare time to make blankets and then, at the start of winter, donate them to the food bank and/or a homeless charity.
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sun 5 May 2024, 8:21, archived)

Well done!

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Sun 5 May 2024, 8:27, archived)

I still do the occasional commission
Anything pixellated is easy, unless there are several shades of the same colour that are only very slightly different. My eyes have trouble telling them apart.
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sun 5 May 2024, 8:42, archived)

Well done !!
👏👏👏
(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Mon 6 May 2024, 8:51, archived)

i stayed in bed all day yesterday and i'm staying in bed until around noon today

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Sun 5 May 2024, 7:52, archived)

I'm up early for the dog every day
Lol up
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Sun 5 May 2024, 7:54, archived)

i was up at half seven because my resident wagtail was tweeting at me by the bedroom window
so i had to get up and feed him. he's got babies and wifey is on the nest so he'll be back in a minute. no rest for the wicked
( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Sun 5 May 2024, 8:03, archived)

I think you will find it is called X now

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Sun 5 May 2024, 8:10, archived)

cycling then Michelangelo exhibition at the British Museum this morning
then roast, then kip. work 2moz
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 5 May 2024, 8:35, archived)

I made my dad take me there when I was a kid
Mostly to see the Egyptian exhibit
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sun 5 May 2024, 8:37, archived)

it's my favourite place in the world

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 5 May 2024, 8:44, archived)

I don't remember much about it
But I know I liked it
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sun 5 May 2024, 8:48, archived)

that was the Egyptian Museum, m8

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Sun 5 May 2024, 9:02, archived)

I hope the roast includes mash
@oldmeme
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Sun 5 May 2024, 9:05, archived)

all y of a bullfinch
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sun 5 May 2024, 11:28, archived)

I'm laughing at BPD right now
twitter.com/geiger_capital/status/1786377408993468714/mediaviewer
(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Sat 4 May 2024, 20:40, archived)

I opened the link in a new private window to reveal:
"Hmm... this page doesn’t exist. Try searching for something else."

I guess it's a gold/silver/crypto scam?
( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Sat 4 May 2024, 22:08, archived)

Oh dear.
No it's a clip about the USA
(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Sun 5 May 2024, 7:11, archived)

Twitter doesn't function like it used to
basically threads and their contents are invisible to people not signed up to Swastika FKA Twitter.
( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Sun 5 May 2024, 15:10, archived)

Why swastika?
I don't understand this at all
/thick
(Bou.. Fuck thee in an offly direction, Mon 6 May 2024, 8:34, archived)

I cba to explain every fucking thing, soz.

( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Mon 6 May 2024, 20:06, archived)

Hide your helmets
www.reddit.com/r/newworldgame/s/aMtI2Qzf9h
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Sat 4 May 2024, 16:28, archived)

what?

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 4 May 2024, 16:43, archived)

new world problems

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Sat 4 May 2024, 16:47, archived)

I don't have a helmet to hide

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 4 May 2024, 16:50, archived)

can you hide my helmet for me?

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Sat 4 May 2024, 16:59, archived)

............................no

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 4 May 2024, 17:10, archived)

( ) ):::::::::::::::D - - - go on

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Sat 4 May 2024, 18:23, archived)

no

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 4 May 2024, 18:29, archived)

( ) ) ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::D please

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Sat 4 May 2024, 18:50, archived)

Hide it yourself
The link literally tells you how to
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sat 4 May 2024, 19:28, archived)

i don't dick unfamiliar links

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Sat 4 May 2024, 19:32, archived)

I think I prefer the news in pidgin.
www.bbc.com/pidgin/tori-41171196
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Sat 4 May 2024, 17:36, archived)

she only wants to pack her poo poo

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 4 May 2024, 18:39, archived)

Meet man wey no get hand but get two Masters' degrees.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Sat 4 May 2024, 20:50, archived)

alright

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Sat 4 May 2024, 19:17, archived)

Alright.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Sat 4 May 2024, 19:37, archived)

Great results for Labour innit

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Sat 4 May 2024, 19:38, archived)

They're all a shower, every party. I'd prefer to be ruled over by a network of unelected horse militia.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Sat 4 May 2024, 20:49, archived)

I've voted Labour my entire life, except for 2019 when they went full spastic.

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Sat 4 May 2024, 20:54, archived)

So your basically a Tory who doesn't want to admit it

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Sat 4 May 2024, 21:09, archived)

Yes mate. Tories are renowned for *checks notes* consistently voting Labour

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Sat 4 May 2024, 22:24, archived)

I've never been a big politics person, but I was quite vocally in favour of the Iraq war. Then it turned out they lied about it which eventually turned me full conspiratard so now I live in the countryside listening to David Icke and hoarding tins of beans.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Sat 4 May 2024, 21:12, archived)

nay

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 4 May 2024, 20:56, archived)

At least the horse militia wouldn't make me queue up and vote for them. Then trample me mercilessly under their hooves while yelling 'you voted for this, we're raising your root vegetable tribute to pay for a war with the tree people from 2 counties over. This is for your own good. Submit! Submit to our care and attention!'
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Sat 4 May 2024, 21:18, archived)

Andy Street is Michael Fabricant's partner, fucking hell

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Sat 4 May 2024, 22:25, archived)