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(
Cheers Cheers, Tue 25 Jun 2024, 15:42,
archived)
I doubt that, but good to see the Boupocalypse is over(
Cheers Cheers, Tue 25 Jun 2024, 15:55,
archived)
If everyone had just done that at the start,she'd have got bored and fucked off sooner. Perhaps.
(, Tue 25 Jun 2024, 17:41, archived)
Remember that time he posted a video of himself masturbating in a car next to a garden with children playing in it?Haha, what an internet legend!
(, Tue 25 Jun 2024, 18:03, archived)
I mean I might be misremembering who posted itbut the cunt's dead now and can't sue, and it's exactly the sort of thing he'd have done anyway.
(, Tue 25 Jun 2024, 18:14, archived)
Men keep wanting more hair on their heads and less on their balls.Might start a pube transplant business.
(, Tue 25 Jun 2024, 15:56, archived)
Very nice (
Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Tue 25 Jun 2024, 15:58,
archived)
happy Tuesday I farted, it was liquid
(
theniwokeup has been awake since, Tue 25 Jun 2024, 13:58,
archived)
Bit warm innitSpain for the cup, kippers for breakfast
End of blog
(, Tue 25 Jun 2024, 6:25, archived)
spain football men have won football before(
MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Tue 25 Jun 2024, 6:29,
archived)
It's not too bad here My place stays quite cool in the hot weather
(
Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Tue 25 Jun 2024, 9:52,
archived)
↑ disappointed necrophile(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 24 Jun 2024, 21:46,
archived)
Prediction here for Wednesday is 27°Not looking forward to it
(
Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Mon 24 Jun 2024, 22:04,
archived)
Sorry can't reply, still at work.(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 24 Jun 2024, 18:49,
archived)
Meaty oligarch frenzy at Heathrow Arrivals(
mr horrible up yours, dickface, Mon 24 Jun 2024, 19:09,
archived)
Well now that would be something (
mr horrible up yours, dickface, Mon 24 Jun 2024, 20:49,
archived)
Morning comradesWe are about to have a 'hearty' breakfast
How are you starting the day?
(, Mon 24 Jun 2024, 6:55, archived)
Got dressed to go to the office Got a message saying work from home
Got undressed again
(
broadsword, Mon 24 Jun 2024, 7:56,
archived)
Just a coffee for me I'm not really hungry
(
Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Mon 24 Jun 2024, 8:44,
archived)
We are going to sit on the beach and eat ice creamPicking up kippers on the way back, proper smoke house ones
(, Mon 24 Jun 2024, 9:36, archived)
What a guy (
Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Mon 24 Jun 2024, 11:16,
archived)
I was involved in one slight altercation, after which I was obliged to relocate to the bel air residence of some close relatives(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 24 Jun 2024, 15:49,
archived)
And how did you find yourself this morning?Well, I just pulled back the sheets and there I was!
(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 24 Jun 2024, 13:33,
archived)
Positive. And I was chewin' Dentyne. I always chewed dentyne. Remember Jerry? Dentyne?(
$$ ✅, Mon 24 Jun 2024, 16:20,
archived)
Chaka Khaaaahhhhhhhhnnnn!!!!Great gig…
(
garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 23:22,
archived)
I stopped serving up years ago. If I get good stuff I will share at cost. Still get done on the serve I supp(
mongychops, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 21:14,
archived)
Well, whatever they ask for, I expect.(
Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sun 23 Jun 2024, 22:37,
archived)
Saruman (
Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 22:04,
archived)
What about immigrants who are themselves horrible bigots?Ha, didn't think about that, did you, bleeding-heart tree-wetting bed-huggers?
(
Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sun 23 Jun 2024, 22:39,
archived)
Hi cock-shitters, Queef Richard's hereI've gone out for a pub lunch, how about THAT???
(
Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 14:22,
archived)
Next you will claim to have friends!You crazy jester!
(
Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 14:24,
archived)
I'm at my parents' houseMy nephew made lunch today and there's visitors here, so the oven cleaning has been postponed, which I'm quite happy about. Might have a pint or two later.
(
Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 16:00,
archived)
I went to the pub yesterday, first time in yonksAnd Suella fucking Braverman walked past. Nearly threw up my Bierra Moretti
(
Two Hats 🎩🎩, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 16:42,
archived)
Sadly it's trueCouple of people I know saw her in town during the day, so I assumed she'd fucked off by the time I went out, but no
(
Two Hats 🎩🎩, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 17:02,
archived)
Keir Starmer was on a building site a few hundred yards from my house, SO THERE.(, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 17:03, archived)
restraining order?(
Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 17:19,
archived)
That's quite a specific distance. How can you be sure?(
Two Hats 🎩🎩, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 17:36,
archived)
restraining order (
Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 17:37,
archived)
The BBC thing was filmed at the university. It's about a half hour walk from here.The end.
(, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 17:40, archived)
I had the opportunity to run over Chris Law MP last weekas he crossed the road in front of me while I was driving home from work. However he was wearing a hi-vis tabard rather than the tweed suit for cunts I normally see him in, so I slowed down.
(, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 17:53, archived)
Well that alcoholic energy drink was a total con. Up at 7 this morning feeling like I'd barely got any energy at all!Taken the kids to gymnastics, then off to B&Q to get some concrete for the new greenhouse.
What are your Sunday plans?
(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 8:58,
archived)
Making you shit out of your cock(
mr horrible up yours, dickface, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 10:14,
archived)
You'd need a fistula for that.(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 14:20,
archived)
I have zero energy lately Had sweet potato for breakfast, as that's supposed to be a high energy food. Currently watching the texas chainsaw massacre and procrastinating before dealing with the kitchen and laundry, then going to visit my parents and clean their oven.
(
Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 10:15,
archived)
Try some Billy.(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 14:20,
archived)
took it daily for 2 yearsin an attempt to lose weight. house has never been cleaner, but I only lost half a stone and I can't imagine the damage I've probably done to my heart
(
Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 15:58,
archived)
She's already cleaning the kitchen and the oven and doing the laundryI think the creased clothes can wait
(, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 14:50, archived)
I'm anaemicI take iron tablets, but they're not really helping
(
Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 15:57,
archived)
Infusion might be the thing for you then.(
brb Monkhouse Stampede, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 16:19,
archived)
I will mention it to my GP(
Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 16:23,
archived)
Oral absorption of iron is notoriously unreliable,best get someone to crucify you with rusty nails. That should do it.
(, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 18:18, archived)
Supposedly if you cook with iron pans you ingest some that waythough I've not researched this claim.
(
brb Monkhouse Stampede, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 21:40,
archived)
I have zero plansHad an old mate over for lunch yesterday, it was incredibly messy and I'm now trying to exercise away the hangover and accompanying existential dread. Might bbq some langoustines*
*not a euphemism
(
Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 11:05,
archived)
Just out walkingOff to a place called Robin Hood's Bay where we will grab some lunch then get the bus back to the b'&'b
Nice weather too so it's all good
(, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 11:59, archived)
Off to a place called
jingle bells, Batman smells, +
Nice weather too so it's all good
(
Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 12:07,
archived)
Lovely place Is Whitby still touting Dracula merch everywhere?
(
Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 12:41,
archived)
Pretty much yeahSome locals believe it is a real story apparently
(, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 12:45, archived)
No accounting for stupid (
Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 13:05,
archived)
It's a big statement full of big ideas, let's unpack some of these concepts shall we(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 12:33,
archived)
Might say, "matey", "chap", and "fellah" today, start sentences with, "Listen old chap.."(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 12:34,
archived)
Might say 'ningles, mateyplops' loads of times(
Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 14:25,
archived)
Saturday night, dance, I like the way you move, Pretty baby It's party time and not one minute we can lose, Be my babyFuck, just remembered I washed my bedclothes and it's all in the dryer.
Press the red button for 2can to take everything out the dryer and make the bed like a normal person.
Press the blue button for me to just go to bed in my jogging stuff and deal with that shit in the morning
(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 22:55,
archived)
Can I press the brown button to make you catastrophically poo yourself?(
Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sat 22 Jun 2024, 23:05,
archived)
Can you make him shit out of his cock?(
mr horrible up yours, dickface, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 23:30,
archived)
*presses both buttons at once**shits in the cistern*
(
brb Monkhouse Stampede, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 23:38,
archived)
Perhaps some more Dragon Soop will get you moving(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 23 Jun 2024, 0:47,
archived)
Just finished that Doctor Who.The first three (0-2) were utter dogshit. Space Babies could very well be the worst 45 minutes of television ever produced. The two Doctor-lite episodes were the best, especially the Black Mirror-like one with the bubbles. The war world and cosplay ones were alright. The penultimate one was fairly good, the finale seemed rushed and unfinished and love saved the universe, again.
/blog
alt: anyone tried that new Star War yet?
altalt: bollocks yeah
(
brb Monkhouse Stampede, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 22:34,
archived)
Doctor Who is for children(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 22:36,
archived)
I don't find licking a funny word. There are others I do. (
mongychops, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 21:32,
archived)
Haha that was well lol with the singing meerkats and all(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 21:22,
archived)
ROBS ALL BENTROBS ALL BENT
ROBS ALL BENT
ROBS ALL BENT
ROBS ALL BENT
ROBS ALL BENT
ROBS ALL BENT
ROBS ALL BENT
etc
(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 21:27,
archived)
Can you not get your missus to make up an account and shut up that piss poor GP? Not even knowing her I respect her opinion more than them. And you tbf(
mongychops, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 21:30,
archived)
Not going to do that for the same reason I don't invite her to my favourite pub and introduce her to the nice south African ladies I occasionally flirt with - she'd fucking ruin it.Besides, she thinks you're all a bunch of childish pricks
(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 21:38,
archived)
Popped in to the pub just now on the way back from my run but they're not here, only boring Cyril :((
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 21:41,
archived)
Jesus this pub is shit, they stop serving food at 8 and all but one of the beers are off (
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 21:43,
archived)
Right fuck that I've gone to the offie over the road and picked up a can for the jog home instead.It's called 'Dragon Soop'. It's a 'red kola' flavoured energy drink that's 7.5% alcohol. Amazing what they can do these days
(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 21:48,
archived)
Well that was a disappointment (
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 21:49,
archived)
Wait which one is supposed to be a GP? (
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 21:55,
archived)
Doesn't surprise me that there are out of work GPs wasting their time posting on here.Despite the fact that the wait to see a GP is now around 6 weeks there are actually loads of GPs desperate for work. I've got basically the same budget to run the surgery that I did three years ago whilst appointment demand has increased 25%, staff costs have increased about 10% with the mandatory pay rises and minimum wage increases and all other costs have rocketed with inflation. Three of our salaried GPs have handed in their notice because they can't cope with the workload and we can't afford to replace them. The government's plan is to replace expensive doctors with cheaper pharmacists, nurse practitioners, physios and mental health nurses. They can't cope with the increasingly complicated elderly patients and all come to me for advice, leaving me with even less time to see patients myself. Plus they go off sick at the drop of a hat and we can't afford locums to cover for them.
NHS Primary care is heading the same way as NHS dentistry ie it's fucked.
(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 22:30,
archived)
kronenbourg is migraine type hangover fuel anyway(
Winthorpe Sim-Sala-Bim, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 10:18,
archived)
Is it really any different in this regard than any other beer of the same strength? I'm skeptical of claims like this.
(
Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sat 22 Jun 2024, 11:25,
archived)
(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 16:04,
archived)
All beer tastes the same(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 12:01,
archived)
(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 16:04,
archived)
...locals have complained of groups of women parading large inflatable phalluses through the terraced streets.(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 12:55,
archived)
For balance, I just saw a recent picture and it's no a n from me(, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 16:17, archived)
Mum's nervous friend who's always on a diet(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 19:36,
archived)
(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 16:05,
archived)
Just picked up some spiced rum and crabbies ginger for sunshine drinkingNow gotta wait for the water cubes to ice over
(, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 16:52, archived)
I am Mystic Smeg.My latest amazing prediction is that It's happening, as confirmed by Russell Brand.
My homeopathic remedy is sausages with green flecks.
(, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 8:10, archived)
I predict that this shit is going to get really old, really fast (
Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 8:40,
archived)
See? That was fast (
Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 9:10,
archived)
I asked/told him to stop on his second post, btw.(
brb Monkhouse Stampede, Sat 22 Jun 2024, 16:38,
archived)
Pushing that pissed up fucktard down the boardWayne Rooney is a big fat fuck! Blobby Blobby Blobby etc...
(, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 19:40, archived)
Just when I convince myself president pretend-doctor is the shittest poster remaining,along comes another beakering no-wit to challenge for the crown.
Me, I mean.
(, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 19:44, archived)
Maybe he's actually a real GP,I've dealt with enough incompetent quacks in my life to believe it's possible. He just insists on himself so much, it seems off somehow.
(, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 19:50, archived)
If I was a real doctor I would mention it in every comment, sometimes twicewhy else go to all that trouble of getting qualified
(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 19:57,
archived)
The Onion's editor in chief is called Chad Nackers(
Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 19:51,
archived)
Weirdly I just mentioned Noel Edmunds to someone(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 19:56,
archived)
"he was a t.v. presenter, let's leave it at that" I just didn't want to get into it, I knew I'd end up angry. (
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 20:03,
archived)
imagine me shouting this Edmonds is famously a proponent of the benefits of “positive energy” to fight cancer, soothe plants and comfort pets. In 2016, he offered a pet counselling service, calling cats and dogs to offer them words of affirmation and positivity. He has published a book titled Positively Happy: Cosmic Ways to Change Your Life, has claimed that he is visited by two orbs the size of melons that he believes are his dead parents, and at one stage carried around a lifesize mannequin named Candice Cannes.
By the end there my throat is cutting up really badly and I'm literally spitting blood with each word.
(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 20:20,
archived)
True, he's been in dressing rooms with top players and spills small tea (
mongychops, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 21:04,
archived)
I just had a ctrl+p to see what you're talking aboutand I now wish I hadn't. How embarrassing.
This thread is also shite. Someone should do a good one.
(
brb Monkhouse Stampede, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 22:14,
archived)
shit up a fuck i finished early and now i'm already drunkare you drunk? i so please piss off and go be drunk somewhere else you obnoxious toerag with digrams
(
MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 17:50,
archived)
they won't replythey all think you smell. which you do. like a tramps poo or a dogs shoe. i'm not sure which. let me have another sniff... wooo yeah that's the good stuff!
(
MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 17:57,
archived)
are you going to start talking to myself again?i've got a restraining order
(
MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 17:59,
archived)
well i've got a brand new combine harvester(
MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 18:01,
archived)
the ladybird book of insults has done you proud(
MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 18:07,
archived)
i only climb on magic beans these days soz(
MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 18:11,
archived)
i can't be bou she can't drive stick. arms too short.(
MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 18:05,
archived)
is that an art gallery or something?(
MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 18:36,
archived)
i've never been so insulted in my life(
MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 18:49,
archived)
Yo, bottom rush the shottomHi wang-dangler's, Queef Richard's here, checking in on this sultry day from officially the best place in the world, East Ham.
(
Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 15:47,
archived)
not wet enough. i'm going for 33p ham these days(
MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 16:12,
archived)
breaded, I hopenothing better than wet, orange mush on the outside of one's cut-price charcuterie, I always say
I mean I do say other things occasionally, that wasn't 100% accurate
(
Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 16:29,
archived)
tank fly boss walk jam nitty grittyyou're listening to the boy from the big bad city
this is ham hock
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Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 16:31,
archived)
ah. meats international.good choice
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MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 16:34,
archived)
what if a vegan who eats a strict vegan diet was to ask you, in strict vegan, what the vegan option was for strict vegans, what would you say(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 17:32,
archived)
if you're a top tier vegan you can only eat other free range organic vegans, but they have to be certified by the royal society of vegan vegetables chaired by sir ronald sprout.they must have been hand reared on pedigee pomegranates since birth and i actually can't be fucked to continue this anymore
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MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 17:39,
archived)
now you say it it's so obvious!(
MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 20:05,
archived)
Yes June 24th is my birthday on this day of birth for mePlease don't naughty step my birthday
(, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 17:08, archived)
piss offi'm not sucking your clit as i do not believe that it is really your birthday
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MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 17:43,
archived)
just noticed the datei believe you EVEN LESS now!
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MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 17:47,
archived)
I'm sitting in a very hot canteen Not starting till 5, I hope that they've had the aircon on upstairs
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Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 16:46,
archived)
i don't think they even have windowsor stairs, actually
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MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 17:43,
archived)
The meeting room has That's why I'm sat in here now
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Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 18:24,
archived)
oh yeah. straddling the exhaust pipe wanking yourself off again eh? (
MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Fri 21 Jun 2024, 18:42,
archived)
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