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# Morning all.
This is either a damning indictment of the perversions of the Internet, or a sign that Mirror readers are stupid.

I direct your attention to the Mirror's 'quick poll' in the middle right of www.mirror.co.uk/
(I helped save b3ta! ?!, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:44, archived)
# i think they should open it out to discussion
where shall we meet?
(I helped save b3ta! Professor Fnord Regius Professor of B3ta Chronology, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:44, archived)
# I'd say 4rthur,
but it looks like there'll be an angry torch waving mob around any minute.
(I helped save b3ta! ?!, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:45, archived)
# Germany?
A/S/L ?
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:47, archived)
#
13, f , london

tell me about sex.
(I helped save b3ta! Happyperson, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:51, archived)
# I run a mobile disco.
(I helped save b3ta! dr_fonz, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:53, archived)
# 18 / M / HACKNEY
I AM 18 AND IN THE ARMY MY GUN IS VERY BIG I ALSO RUN MUSIC BANDS LIKE ATOMIC KITTEN AND BUSTED EMINEM IS MY BEST FRIEND

DO YOU LIKE IT WHEN YOU WEE HAHHAHA
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:54, archived)
# 32/M/ Wormwood Scrubs
ahem!
18/F/Basildon

I mean!

Good recovery
(t3d on FTLFM now http://83.149.101.8:8070/listen.pls, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:56, archived)
# my money is on the latter
[edit] that is the shoddiest bit of web pagery i've seen in a long time...
(I helped save b3ta! new_matt, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:45, archived)
# Makes me feel better.
Note: this could also be a reply to 90Nz0, weeing Q up ^^there^^
(t3d on FTLFM now http://83.149.101.8:8070/listen.pls, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:59, archived)
# I voted "yes".
To protect them from speaking like a bunch of retarded fuckwits, though.
(I helped save b3ta! Baz Fuck off, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:45, archived)
# I like the
human interest angle to the drugs busts story: "Cocaine prices set to rocket". Funny how journalists should be so concerned.
(I helped save b3ta! Baz Fuck off, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:46, archived)
# That was in fact the only thing I noticed
on the whole page.


Not that I would care.
(I helped save b3ta! dr_fonz, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:48, archived)
# Is that a picture of a young Hobbes beside
TEACHER JAILED FOR SCHOOL TRIP DEATH 'story'
Term story used loosely
(t3d on FTLFM now http://83.149.101.8:8070/listen.pls, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 14:01, archived)
# what what what
hey i voted "no" on the poll and the "no" percentage went DOWN
(Hobbes, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 14:03, archived)
# I voted no too.
Opened a new copy of the home page with the menu down the side. Couldn't resize or do anything useful.

Bleeding hacks.
(t3d on FTLFM now http://83.149.101.8:8070/listen.pls, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 14:14, archived)
# I can't see the price going up much
drugs have always been inflation proofed, it's not as if they cost much to produce.
(I helped save b3ta! Pootle, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 14:01, archived)
# "Should ALL chat rooms be shut to protect children?"
?
(I helped save b3ta! King Ralph is drunk, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:45, archived)
# I voted 'no'
and now I'm on the Mirrors Potential Sex Offender List (pSOL).

shit.
(I helped save b3ta! Prof UnderCover evitable, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:54, archived)
# Presumably
they asked for your address when you clicked "no"...
(I helped save b3ta! dr_fonz, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:54, archived)
# yeah
they told me I'd won something, so I gave them my address.

arse cakes
(I helped save b3ta! Prof UnderCover evitable, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:57, archived)
# oooh
excelent.

i voted yes.

Down with those who use the internet to communicate
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Kitteny Berk almost certainly drunk, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:45, archived)
# Political madness
gone correct!!!

(I helped save b3ta! Banana, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:46, archived)
# surley there are enough of us on the board to render this
little poll invalid
(I helped save b3ta! Happyperson, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:46, archived)
# is a poll of mirror readers valid
for anything useful anyway?
(I helped save b3ta! barnesy, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:47, archived)
# It's reliable,
but not valid.
(I helped save b3ta! ?!, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:52, archived)
# I think kiddy fiddlers should be given their own special chatroom
where 50% of them can pretend to be kids. What's the harm in that?
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:46, archived)
# haha
excelent plan.

but then 13 year olds will go on pretending to be adults.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Kitteny Berk almost certainly drunk, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:47, archived)
# That
never happens mum mate.
(I helped save b3ta! bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:48, archived)
# Therefore, you require proof of age,
and proof of identity to register.

Then you send the fuzz round.
(I helped save b3ta! ?!, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:48, archived)
# So 13 year old kids,
would go on and pretend to be 45 year old men to try and groom the 45 year old men pretending to be 13 year old kids?

That would be fantastic.
(goat thinks you're shit, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:50, archived)
# yep. exactly
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Kitteny Berk almost certainly drunk, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:51, archived)
# i confused
so how old am i supposed to be?
(I helped save b3ta! Happyperson, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:52, archived)
# yes
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Kitteny Berk almost certainly drunk, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:54, archived)
# 15 hands tall
(I helped save b3ta! Pootle, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 14:07, archived)
# most of them do any way
(NO_I'M_BRIAN_BLESSED, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:48, archived)
# Those already exist.
A friend of mine spent quite some time on one - purely for research purposes, of course.
(I helped save b3ta! dr_fonz, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:49, archived)
# Was he
writing a book on the subject?
(I helped save b3ta! wayward., Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:51, archived)
# You just want the link
don't you?


don't you?
(I helped save b3ta! dr_fonz, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:51, archived)
# damn
any children out there not in school?

meet me behind the bikeshed
(I helped save b3ta! Sunshine Elephant, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:46, archived)
# "Cocaine prices set to rocket" apparently
(I helped save b3ta! dr_fonz, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:46, archived)
# "poncey salad leaf prices set to rocket"
(I helped save b3ta! new_matt, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:47, archived)
# "rockets set to be hugely disappointing when set off*
(I helped save b3ta! Tedmus, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:52, archived)
# "Guy Fawkes turning in his grave"
(I helped save b3ta! popt_art, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:54, archived)
# "Cocaine sent to Rocket, Heroin sent to Tubbs"
(I helped save b3ta! bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:58, archived)
# nice punnage.
(I helped save b3ta! Baron von Twuntenstein, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:54, archived)
# Oh dearie me
I think they should also ban cars on the same basis. And sweets.
(I helped save b3ta! HP hasn't been here in aaaaaages, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:46, archived)
# And puppy dogs
(I helped save b3ta! F5 F5 F5 Can't be arsed., Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:51, archived)
# There is one bloke at microsoft,
who has been clicking the same button all day.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:47, archived)
# has he
tired rebooting?
(I helped save b3ta! aubergene, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:49, archived)
# Pish...
Now you've made me look at Tamarararararara Beckwith .. how dare you..
(G-Funk, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:47, archived)
# Oh I like Tamara!
tell me...what's her job again?
(I helped save b3ta! robh, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:54, archived)
# God.
The Mirror is almost as reactionary as the Daily Mail.....
(I helped save b3ta! Mr Gear the gay-maker, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:47, archived)
# it's all been downhill since they gave Amy Vickers the boot
bring her back! Down with Vordermann!
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:48, archived)
# I miss the occasional cry of
"Hello Amy!"
I wonder if she's still watching us...
(I helped save b3ta! bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:51, archived)
# I bet she is.
And masturbating at the same time.
(I helped save b3ta! Baz Fuck off, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:53, archived)
# I doubt it
She's writing about consumer issues these days.
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:55, archived)
# Ah,
consumer issues.
"These Beans are far too expensive!!"
(I helped save b3ta! bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:57, archived)
# Whatever happened to
that nice Cap'n Bob?
(I helped save b3ta! F5 F5 F5 Can't be arsed., Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:52, archived)
# we're all perverts !
and how cool ?!
www.kiss-textil.de/galactikaen.htm
(I helped save b3ta! Tedmus, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:48, archived)
# haha!
I like how they have videos of it 'in action'!
(I helped save b3ta! barnesy, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:49, archived)
# UV Seating....
that'll show up the stains.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:52, archived)
# My wife says I'm
a pervert, but I disagree.
(I helped save b3ta! F5 F5 F5 Can't be arsed., Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:55, archived)
# See
www.b3ta.com/board/2029533

It was about The Sun, but it works just as well for The Mirror.
(I helped save b3ta! pxyzyzygy, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:49, archived)
# oh dear.
i do like the way the 'yes' button is already selected. makes it soooo much easier.
(I helped save b3ta! mrRush, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:49, archived)
# they
should just do away with the "no" button altogether
(I helped save b3ta! aubergene, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:50, archived)
# Can't we
just ban children?
(I helped save b3ta! backrubslut - treguna mekoides trecorum satis dee, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:50, archived)
# Why doesn't
the poll update when I refresh?
I smell a rat.
(I helped save b3ta! bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:52, archived)
# Does it small like cheese.....
Mmmm?
(I helped save b3ta! Samsonite, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:55, archived)
# No,
like a rat.
(I helped save b3ta! bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 14:00, archived)
# ...
(I helped save b3ta! Olembe Refuses to write in this space, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:53, archived)
# Gonads! i tried to click!
(I helped save b3ta! popt_art, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:55, archived)
# where's bovine with his list?
you should know better ;)
(I helped save b3ta! new_matt, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 13:59, archived)
# looks
like we've had an effect
it's only 53.1 in favour now
(I helped save b3ta! atomboy, Wed 24 Sep 2003, 14:04, archived)