I found it through Weebls,
when I found and fell in love with Hey hey 16k. It took me a while longer to find the different sections and then longer still to find the courage to start posting to the QOTW. Now I happily post my gimp-mangled humorous ideas to the weekly image challenge. Thanks B3ta, you and your members are a constant source of humor and cheer to me.
( dazbrilliantwhites has been meaning to change this..., Mon 12 Sep 2011, 13:46, Reply)

I was hanging out in Vegas, with Frank, Dino and Sammy
but they were dead and smelly so I decided to bail out and head home. Before I left, Dino's widow, Thora Hird, had told me about this crazy site called B3ta.com. Well, I took one look and realised I'd found a new home.
And the rest, as they say, is bullshit.
( Lord Kronos Go Team Pachyderm, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 13:42, Reply)

my brother introduced me to b3ta
i can't remember what he showed me on the site, but I remember an incredible faceswap between paul daniels and debbie mcghee that had me laughing like a drain.
( Spunky McPunk not dead yet, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 13:33, Reply)

It started with weebles' badger song...
then I found b3ta.co.uk with "birmingham" and "tramp'o'claus".
( Mr. Oleary MAKE MONEY FAST $$$, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 13:31, Reply)

La la la, we've got your name - introducingmonday.co.uk (now defunct)
Was featured in backbytes of Computing magazine. There's still an article on the web about it now: news.scotsman.com/comment/Web-not-as-easy-to.2502663.jp
( heyrudi has just found this setting, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 13:30, Reply)

NTK
Some years ago NTK featured a website I made (the creaking, dusty, not-updated-for-6-years Random Times). It was the first real thing I'd made on the internet that people liked, so like a good stalker I tracked my site visitors down and found a lot of links from b3ta. So I stayed, because it's 99% talented, intelligent, funny people and 1% flouncy twats. And I also found out my cousin was living with the lovely Emvee.

This is my favourite ever thing on b3ta: CAKIES
Followed in no particular order by:
Jaws
Thingy
Belize
Countdown
Ketchup
Robins
Sink

Thankyou b3ta, please never die.
( Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 13:30, Reply)

I remember when it wasn't shit and full of cunts like you.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 13:28, Reply)

rathergood's 'i like the moon', years ago.
then it was a regular looky-place when qotw was funny. now i'm a bitter old /talk harridan who constantly upsets people on facebook due to forgetting that the rest of the internet is not b3ta. oh, and that's bee-three-tee-ay thankyouverymuch. none of this rhymes-with-peter nonsense.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 13:25, Reply)

I read an article in The Big Issue,
which was about Popbitch, and included a link to Joel's Gak Attack game. That led me back to b3ta (bee-three-tee-ay, not bay-tuh).

Nostalgia's not what it used to be, is it?

From emailing xfm, I'm led to believe that Iain Baker used to visit quite frequently, and donated towards the running costs - top quality, celebrity endorsement, I'm sure you'll agree.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 13:20, Reply)

Almost 8 years ago I followed a link from Rathergood
I was here quite a while, I went away.
Met some nice people, many of whom are still good friends.
( Hankster, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 13:19, Reply)

b3ta ruined my life
b3ta.com/questions/b3tamemories/post1349665
( Captain V, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 13:12, 1 reply)

I get laid now and then.
Thank you B3ta.
( girlinthehole, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 13:03, 4 replies)

Buffy's swearing keyboard
Someone posted a link to Buffy's swearing keyboard on one of the Usenet groups (I think it was something to do with DVDs.) I loved the keyboard, and instantly became hooked on the rest of the site. The Buffy keyboard has remained a firm favourite ever since, and I still occasionally post the link in various places for people who haven't seen it. It took me years to discover that the space bar said 'fuck off.' Fondest memories would be Furtive and Fluffy, Thor's man (I'm fucking dis custard etc.) and the cry of "I can't fucking hummus." 'Motorbikes will make you gay' was brilliant too (you can still track it down on the Interweb if you try hard enough.)

I couldn't say how long I was on before signing up for an account, but apparently I'm a veteran of 9 years, 3 months and 6 days as of today. Until now, I thought I'd joined something that was already well established. It certainly felt that way at the time. I was quite active in those early days, but the site's standards of art and humour kept on improving, and mine just didn't keep up, so I switched mostly to lurker mode and stayed there.
( Horatio P Lemming, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 13:00, Reply)

B3ta sporting glory
I bullied althegeordie round the Bristol half-marathon yesterday. If it wasn't for B3ta he'd be able to walk down the stairs today.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 12:55, Reply)

sweet memories
found b3ta after being sent a link to a quiz. I then spent the last 9 years 4 months lurking.
( Smashy only 35 years of work to go :), Mon 12 Sep 2011, 12:52, Reply)

Job Shittyness Barometer
Whenever I grow bored and restless in a job, b3ta jumps back in to the regular internet history for a year or so until I jump ship to do some work in the new job.
Were it not for the death of 4rthur several years back, I may still be stuck in Basingstoke. So thank you.
( Ulic hissing slightly, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 12:49, Reply)

Fuck
Eight years since I joined as well. Have a commemorative plate in recognition.

( Smallbrainfield, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 12:49, 1 reply)

Spent every waking moment thinking of image-based puns.
For MONTHS! Thanks b3ta for wrecking my career...

Wherever in the world I am, I still manage to check in every single day. It has become as much of my normal day as carrying a phone or house keys.
( Linbox has a serious dunk habit, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 12:42, Reply)

Several drunken bashes, a 155 mile walk of shame, and getting knocked up by a midget.
I've been a QOTW regular for over four years now. I remember the good old days when all this was textfields and no replies. Everything I've posted about on here has been true with the exception of a story about my prize fighting whelk, Rocky.

But I digress... Back in 2009 I went to a B3ta stagbash - Devil_In_Tights was getting married and we decided to get absolutely pissed in his honour. It was a hot day, I hadn't eaten very much, and I arrived in that there London with the intention of having a glass or two of wine and a late train back to Bristol. Instead, I woke up in Hertford with fellow B3tan Captain V, a.k.a. Catface, on a sofabed in his parents' dining room. At least I knew his username. I had no idea where Hertford was but a quick text to some other B3tans and I established I had a 155 mile Walk of Shame ahead of me in a broken pair of shoes. Turns out I quite liked the young man, which was lucky as he knocked me up a short time later. The conversations with friends and family were convoluted, to say the least:

"Yes, I'm pregnant. Well, we've been together for a couple of months... Um, he's bipolar too. Yeah, met him at a party. Well, I knew him from the Internet. No, not from a mental health website. Well, sort of. From B3ta. Er, like a creative writing site. No mum, you can't have the link to it. Of course he's lovely. He's a bit shorter than me, yeah but what's three or four inches, eh? Fnarr. oh, and he's a bit younger than me. Okay, he's 12 years younger than me."

Thanks to B3ta I found the bloke I want to grow old with (although I have a head start) and we have one of those noisy children things. Our daughter was born in July 2010. We married in December 2010 with a bunch of b3tans at the wedding, who we rickrolled in place of a reading. Catfaceceilidhbaby is a technohappy one year old who makes every day a joy. In true QOTW fashion she likes breasts.

Thank you, B3ta. And thank you, b3tans.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 12:42, 6 replies)

"LOL face rape"
I was sent this link by a friend:
www.b3ta.com/board/8121376
Never looked back.
( Wet-chinned bag shanker Cannot parse Wogan, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 12:40, 1 reply)

Coming up for four years... This may also be as long as it will take to read the below post. Which is shit. I wouldn't bother if I were you
Although I lurked for a while beforehand. Was directed here by the IT guy at my old place of work (The Glum Reaper if anyone cares) and spent my working hours trawling through the old QOTWs and then one day stumbled across a weird and wonderful place called Off Topic.

This was back in the days before Bert was ousted as an incestuous paedophile had an epic bertdown and tried to reinvent himself on a daily basis, so new members were welcomed rather than subjected to howls of FUCK OFF BERT.

OT wasn't the deserted wasteland it is now, only populated by moaning old men who shun anything after the 1970's, it was filled with a smörgåsbord of seriously disturbed people who made Bernard Manning look like a slightly fatter Mary Whitehouse.

The working hours were whittled away by talking about cake and other rubbish and I was made aware of the Calendar. A place where you could actually go and meet these people. Of your own free will. And apparently not get placed on any kind of list for doing so. So I drove to Manchester for a Halloween bash which had people from across the boards. The possible highlight was Enzyme misspelling his name. Although him and Boss Keloid dancing like drunken bears possibly comes a close second. I then stayed with Warmfuzzyfeeling (who was as lovely as her name sounds) and then the next day drove to Leeds to watch the last race of the F1 season with Boss Keloid and ate cake and revelled in the moment Massa's team realised he hadn't won and went from happy to sad in a brilliant ohnosecond.

From then on I was addicted and frequented more bashes, mostly in London where other awesome B3tans gave me a place to stay. Then I got so addicted I moved to London and lived with some B3tans (OH HAI GONZ!) so I could go to move bashes.

I've seen Sexface get shunned at the bash which lead to Catface and CHCB hook up and have a baby and get married (I've also seen the baby and was at the wedding but luckily they were able to control themselves enough that I didn't have to watch them hooking up).

I've seen Kaol go from a stabby mantroll to managing somehow to catch a delightful welsh mongwrangler (Hi Mel!) and almost manage to turn into a useful member of society.

I've spent awesome Sundays watching the F1 and eating far too much bacon (a kilogram of bacon, fresh from Borough market) with lovely Clendrix and the he-must-be-alive-he's-blinking Wooks.

I've taken ridiculous road trips with Labs all over the country whilst listening to insane music and having a mohawked, tattooed, face pierced man scowling and pointing at middle lane drivers. Or on occasion seeing how many times we could loop them before they pulled over (they never pull over the fuckers).

I've had Al insult the size of my vagina whilst stuffing himself full of ribs, and failed to stop laughing as he bursts into his crazy booming chuckle.

I've travelled around the country nosing at people's houses (yours was lovely BGB) and getting drunk and ridiculous and laughing so much I thought my jaw was going to fall off. Mainly after insulting Catface.

I've seen Pooflake and Captain Placid play a gig and had Pooflake serenade me (you still have my number right? Call me anytime!)

So B3ta brought me a wonderful group of friends, allowed me to move to London and has given me more stupid ridiculous memories and memes that is good for anyone.

So yeah not funny and mostly just rambling shit. But strangely B3ta has probably been the biggest influencing factor of my adult life!

I know there are loads of you who I haven't mentioned by name (Lusty did I mention you? You know I love you) but you're all fantastic.

fuck sorry ma and pa. *slurps* You both fucking rock
Apart from Bert.

Fuck off Bert.
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 12:35, 6 replies)

Jada
I first became aware of B3ta through a link in The Register to the mentalness that is Jada. I don't even think the B3ta site had properly launched then, but the newsletters had. A few further links from there and NTK meant that B3ta.com got added to my bookmarks, but I only ever looked at the front page. It was months before I realised how to get to the messageboard. Once I did find the link a login account was created shortly thereafter and my doom was sealed.
( evil_andy Stick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 12:34, Reply)

Got sent 'I love you kitten' on an AOL chatroom
And went from there.....
(robneymcplum spiced up his life on, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 12:32, Reply)

The Virgin thing
The Register ran a story on it while I was sleep deprived at a satellite monitoring station in outback NSW.

Oh and money: I work part time for Legless now. So Richard Branson is directly responsible for me lying in a pool of my own vomit in a hotel in Melbourne last year, and a quiet revolution in healthcare information management in Australia.

One day I'll get to a bash... unless I've been and blacked out.
(pizzaforcat ate some cement and HARDENED the FUCK UP on, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 12:27, Reply)

Gay post alert.
I used to be a regular on /talk, but I've since drifted away from it. However, it has changed my life incredibly.

One afternoon, a post on /talk sent me to another website where about half the regulars are b3ta regulars (or were at one time). One of them is a smashing young lady and /talk regular (not so much as she used to be, though). We became friends and when my marriage ended she and I got to talking more regularly as friends. I'm in the US, but I decided to take a chance and asked if I could be her date for her friend's wedding last October. She agreed, I flew over, and we REALLY liked each other. I came over a couple more times, and I started looking for a job in England (even had an interview in Ipswich!). We've met several times, such as for an incredible Valentine's Day, a bash (for a that other website) and weekend holidays.

I wish I could say there was a fairy tale ending, but alas, it was not to be (or at least not yet). She and I have reluctantly moved on since with the current economy and tight-assed UK immigration restrictions there was no way for me to get a job over there. The door is open that if I can get over there we might give it another go, but I'm afraid that won't be any time soon. No matter what, I have a new best buddy and have had a wonderful year of getting to see England, falling in love, and having hope at a time when it would have been too easy to give up.
( setimret likes his metaphors mixed, not stirred, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 12:26, 2 replies)

6.5 years of b3ta on the brain.
Just over 6 years, 6 months and 23 days ago I was googling the lyrics to the Rednex's "Cotton eyed Joe." I couldn't understand what the screechy woman was caterwauling. Google took me to something called "The Question of the Week," to a post under the question "Worst Song Ever."

"Little things that turn you on" was the open question, and I made my first b3ta post. I posted exclusively in QOTW for about the first nine months I was here, and I didn't even know the rest of this place existed.

One of the first FPs I remember was an animation of some guy watching a streaming video of a shooter on a rampage in an office, from the shooter's POV. The final seconds showed the shooter looking through a doorway and the guy watching seeing himself on the shooter's eyes. I knew I'd love this place. I tried my hand at posting on /board (see my profile for some of my faves). I also was a regular on /talk for a time. I don't post much anymore, but I still look in several times a day, especially to /board.

On a more personal note, I wrote a book (I'm still trying to get it published) where the characters meet on what is essentially b3ta.
( setimret likes his metaphors mixed, not stirred, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 12:23, Reply)

I found b3ta after NTK ran links two weeks in a row
for b3ta stuff.

Made stupid animation about Davros and Stephen Hawking.

Went drinking with Rob and Joel in Soho. Made myself very ill.

Never looked back.
[EDIT: Oooh 10 days to go till I'm 10 on here!]
( chthonic, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 12:13, 2 replies)

Sick Jokes
I clearly remember how I discoverd b3ta. I was at work and Christopher Reeve had died and there was an unusual lack of sick jokes arriving on my phone. Giving it some thought for a while I couldn't think of any so decided to google it. One of the results was a link to the sick jokes question of the week - which later became the book of sick jokes. Just in case you're interested it was when is Christopher Reeve not Christopher Reeve? When he's Christopher Walken.

Proudest moment was being voted the most popular answer on the question of the week with a story that every time I tell it is now appended with "that was the most popular story on b3ta once."

Top work by everyone involved. Never change and we'll never leave.
( TriedItOnceAndDidn'tLikeIt made you lose the game on, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 12:07, Reply)

In at the groundfloor
and lurker supreme.
(Speshal, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 12:05, Reply)

it's been a while - 9 years, 4 months, 25 days apparently.
I first found b3ta in 2002 through a picture someone had linked of the Queen Mother (animated gif, her face falls off, she's a robot underneath - no idea who made it). I was at uni at the time, and thus had a lot of free time, and so enthusiastically threw myself into participation on the board making a number of craply-executed animated gifs.

It was a time when the prevailing theme of pictures and animations was of Furtive the polar bear, Fluffy his penguin prey, Domo-kun and the like. Bovine, munkt0n, weebl and crab_bloke (before Joel changed his name) were regular boarders, jvm and 100% Kitten ring a bell too, and every now and then Koit used to ask for a hand putting together a song (track down his Billy Joel-inspired "World of B3ta" for a more comprehensive guide to who was who then). The phrase 'I can't fucking hummus' summed up many a fellow boarder whose ambition with Potatochop far outweighed his abilities, myself absolutely included.

The site then was totally geared towards having a giggle and trying to help others do the same, with none of the snide cliquey stuff that seems to have crept up a bit between talk & QOTW (sadly). Nobody cared if there was someone wrong on the internet and everyone was left mostly to their own devices, unless they were being deliberately antagonistic and offensive (then usually they were left in no doubt as to how welcome they were to kindly fuck off).

I've since managed to curb my habit, and relegated myself to mostly lurking, with the odd brief contribution to QOTW or liking especially good links the extent of my interaction.

It's still a fun place, populated mostly by fun, talented folk who enjoy putting their photoshopping and artistic skills on display for the delectation of others. The expanded community these days has obviously brought with it the usual quota of keyboard warriors and internet hardman pedants, but outside their bedroom fortresses b3ta still is a great place to come to kill time, have a laugh, and discover another video of kittens being adorable/stupid/thinking they're peoples.

Long may it continue.
( shindig, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 12:05, Reply)