I got a Sony Ericsson Xperia X10
If you make a call, you can't hear the other person unless you're in the soundproof chamber where they test Bang & Olufsen microphones. Which is a bit shit for a phone.

Oh, and it runs an outmoded version of Android. Imagine buying a new 'Windows laptop" from a big name like Dell or Compaq and it turns out it's running Windows XP.

In fact, I'm going to put this in Top Tips. If I can pursuade one other person from getting one, I will be happier.

Edit: and I'm not happy that SE have hard-wired their own media player into it which you can't fucking uninstall.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Mon 6 Sep 2010, 10:16, 16 replies)

How to successfully complain to your credit card company.
I used to work for Lloyds TSB in credit card customer services. I hated them.
Most people you will speak to on the phone will feel the same way. They WANT to refund the unfair charge you've been given.
Here's how you do it - ask. You have to say "Can you refund the charge?" That's it.
Don't write an eight page letter in green ink, don't start abusing the poor cunt with a shit job, just ask.
( Zuowan, Mon 6 Sep 2010, 9:41, 4 replies)

Apple
Bindun surely?

A few months back I bought a brand new 160gig Classic iPod. Took it home, charged it up, filled it with music, battery went flat in about 8 hours, which is far below the 36 hours quoted on the Apple website. Took it back to Harvey Norman and they were happy to replace it, they just had to get a confirmation call from Apple, in case they wanted to have their own people assess it.

It took them 5 days to get back to HN. Five bloody days. Every time I called up HN they were really nice and apologetic even though it wasn't their fault, but that was my debut first-hand experience of Apple emphatically not giving a toss about their customers.

Eventually got a replacement, but a bit too late for my satisfaction.
(ElGranto, Mon 6 Sep 2010, 9:20, 10 replies)

im considering writing one to the landlord
we ring up and explain that the amount of damp in the ground floor bedroom is unacceptable. they'll have to sort it out.

i receive a phonecall. 'hello. we're the builders. landlord has hired us to repaint your window."

"hang on," i go "im sure thats not right the entire room needs redoing."

ring landlord. "no, thats right." they go.

builders turn up this morning (i let them in after hastily throwing not-allowed pet cat through back door) and show them the damage which covers three of the walls. some of the damp starts waving at us because it has evolved to a higher level of intelligence and independent movement.

they show me their message - paint bay window.

builders ring up landlord. "can we repaint the whole room please?"

"go on then."

MDFISGFSHFHLDFHDSFUHSAFH!
(ladyintheradiator, Mon 6 Sep 2010, 9:18, 4 replies)

As a till monkey myself
I shall put some (potentially useful) advice in the comments section here. Far too long for the main QOTW.
( Bats, Mon 6 Sep 2010, 7:45, 4 replies)

Hell$tra
Name changed to protect the monopoly...

4.5 years since moving out of home I've come back to free meals, free washing, free board and free hugz 'n' kisses [was getting those before from previous live-with GF, but I always ended up paying for it]

"Weeee" says I, with an exclamation of "Cheap internetz!" thrown in for good measure. Shame internetz are all clogged up with crappy ADSL 1 bandwidth ak-she-own-kneh.

I found out...nay I confirmed it was ADSL 1 once I called the tech support.
Them: "Oh you've been on ADSL 1 for well over the term of your contract..."
Me: "So you've been supplying my family with a $70 12GB crap connection for over 2 years!?"
Them: "Yes - we only upgrade the speed when people call"
Me: *FUMING* "So basically you've found out a good way to screw over people who don't realise when they are paying far too much for such a shit service"
Them: "Would you like that speed upgraded sir"
Me: "Hell yes"

So the gist I'm given is, 4 business days 'for us to put the codes on the line' (getting some tech to insert some lines of commands into a cisco router)
Fine I say, I'm not in a rush to download the internet yet (in a rush for some redtube.com though but given the communal nature of my computer...not too keen on risking it)

So 4 school days come and go. Come home. Check internet...slow.

Power cycle networking hardware...slow.

Call up ISP...waiting in queue...slow...get through to phone monkey

Me: *Gives reference number* It is still slow
Them: *Reads notes/watches the end of 24/sips coffee while blankly looking at back of object of affection's head* "Ahhh yes, I see we don't have the order in the system (for the tech to put the codes on the line)"
Me: "What...does that...mean...?"
Them: "It means I'll have to create the order. 4 business days until it takes effect"
Me: *FFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU* But I was told this 4 days ago. The order is there. I was on the line while the person did it (It was a chick, and she knows fuck all about how to get some CCNA tech to telnet into a router and copy + paste some code)
Them: "I can understand...I'm going through the same thing"
Me: "BULLSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHH.........I'm speaking to your supervisor"


I then went on to mention "I needz teh pr0nz now" in addition to "Since I'm out of contract I can sign up with another ISP and get connected with ADSL 2+ at a cheaper contractual rate within 4 days" lots of "Consulting with level 3 technicians took place" and magically "We've just found your order in another area. Your ADSL 2+ should be active in 40 minutes"

And it was.

Always threaten to go to a competitor.
(lemonadegame, Mon 6 Sep 2010, 7:41, 6 replies)

My camera never lies! It gets me cheap shampoo though.
Seeing an A-board outside Wilkinsons* advertising some normally very expensive hair products for under £2 a bottle, I stocked up for my daughter.

On the shelf though the price was normal/extortionate so I took the precaution of popping outside to photograph the sign before paying.

Had the argument, showed my photo, went outside with the manager to look at the sign, blah blah blah, got the hair products at the lower price.

Unlike zebideedoodah's Asda wine though, the hair products were highly satisfactory and my daughter was thrilled. Reeee-sult!

*British household goods chain
(Juan Quar is clinging to her front teeth on, Mon 6 Sep 2010, 7:18, 2 replies)

i hate public libraries!
10 years ago i borrowed a book about the battle of thermopiything. read the book and returned it within 2 weeks. 2 weeks after the due date i recieved a letter asking me to return the book and informing me of the late fees etc... rang the library telling them i have returned the book which the librarian confirms.

cue many months of letters and phonecalls flying between me and the council for the book... i swear the librarians they had were on the wrong side of thick, each time i rang up and confirmed that this book was indeed returned and was not outstanding a letter would arrive about a month later... this went on for about a year and a half in total then the letters just stopped.

i have no idea what happened to that book, and as far as the council is concerned i still owe the library for that book.
(sennik85 hiding from the world, Mon 6 Sep 2010, 3:39, 3 replies)

YouTube
I once complained to YouTube that putting the pop-up menu at the bottom of the video with links to other related videos appeared during the playing of a video when the mouse hovvered over it (before the video had finished playing) which was embedded in a 3rd party webpage was misleading in that it could make viewers of the website think the other videos were put there by the same person who embedded it in the webpage.

They only went and emailed me back saying they understand what I meant and stopped the related-videos-menu appearing during playback of the video! I was a bit gobsmacked actually.

Sorry I haven't had anything interesting to complain about, I don't usually complain to corporations because I know it will usually fall on deaf ears.
( Haku Orange Whip? Orange Whip? Three Orange Whips., Mon 6 Sep 2010, 3:33, 1 reply)

From My Blog

I wrote an open letter to Micro$oft the other week. Here it is:

I'd like to find a developer who worked on Microsoft Vista. I'd like to kidnap him and take him into a dark room and render him unconscious. Then I'd like to introduce a 1 inch diameter pipe up his arse and thread a load of rusty barbed wire up there. About a yard of it should do. Then I'd withdraw the pipe and leave the rusty barbed wire entangled with his guts and anus. Then I'd tie off the free end of the barbed wire to a ring on the wall and sit there and wait for him to wake up.

Then I'd boot his pathetic carcass around the room so the barbed wire dragged his guts out through his arse!!


Don't write shite software - OK?

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Mon 6 Sep 2010, 1:33, 10 replies)

not exactly a complaint
But seeing as most of the stories this week seem to be about people in authority being pricks, have this.

My sister in law's cousin's father in friend was driving home through Sydney after work one day, tired, looking forward to a cold beer etc. when he sees blue lights in his mirror and a cop pulling him over.

Surprised, but not alarmed, he pulls over and the cop gets out of his car, strides in a manly fashion up to his car and grins through the window.

"there a problem officer?" he asks.

"Yep... you didn't indicate when changing lanes at the stop light there mate*. I'm afraid it's a $60 ticket for you" chuckles the traffic cop.

"OH, come on, mate, don't give me that, you aren't seriously gonna give me a ticket for that, are you?" he asks, with some incredulity.

"yes mate, I'm afraid it's the law. And I fucking love it, I've been pulling people all day on that one" chunters the cop, writing out the ticket and presenting it with a flourish.

Queue MUCH grinding of teeth from inside the car, a counting to ten, and a sigh, followed by an unbuckling (keep it clean, there).

"Do you mind if I get out and show you something in the back of the car?" says our hero, our man of the hour, as he unfolds himself from his car on that hot, dusty Australian afternoon.

"Sure" says the cop, completely untaken aback "what you got in there?"

"This" says the driver, pulling on his work coat and silly hat, with the logo of the health and safety inspectorate on it.

"I noticed as you stepped from your vehicle onto the highway, in the course of your work, that you failed to don your high visibility jacket, as clearly stipulated in the H&S rules covering your profession. I hereby officially caution you and serve you with a $1000 on the spot fine. Sorry mate, but I'm afraid it's the law".

He says it was the happiest moment of his life, and still dines out on it some ten years later, and I think we all can take a quiet personal revery from a beautiful moment.


*or some esoteric pissy local traffic law
(pounana Slept well, and dreamed of large women, on, Mon 6 Sep 2010, 0:48, 9 replies)

And whilst on the subject of wine...
There is a fantastic Indian restaurant on the Perth Rd in Dundee, right next door to a kebab shop. The (Indian) food is, quite frankly, phenomenally good. So good, in fact, that almost everything else about the place seems to rank null points or less - including the wine list, which seems to be no more than an afterthought on the part of the management. We four ordered wine and found it to be well and truly corked. Called for the manager who, when told the problem, replied: "So what? We didn't make it."

It only was a combination of the promise of the food to come and open-mouthed shock that kept us there. As it happens, we didn't pay for the wine. When he saw that it was still on the table, untouched, at the end of the meal, he took it off the bill. He got big points from me though, just for his bare-faced fuck you-ness.
(zebideedoodah likes florence but prefers venice, Mon 6 Sep 2010, 0:48, 5 replies)

Sancerrely Yours
I have two tales for this topic, but I may not get around to them both.

A good few years ago I was mooching around my local Asda (unfortunately the only store near enough to home to make shopping there worthwhile) when I spotted a boner feedy bargain - bottles of Sancerre for under a fiver. Partial as I then was to a spot of white, and having recently discovered this particular grape (whilst knowing fuck-all about wine in general), I took all the remaining seven bottles off the shelf and gleefully put them in the trolley.

At the checkout all went smoothly until I saw the price of the wine was almost twelve quid a bottle. I pointed out the error to the cashier, but she was having none of it. "That's not what it says here" etc, etc.

So naturally, I asked if she could call the manager. She didn't, but brought over her till supervisor, who again tried to insist that the wine was correctly priced. Now I'm not big on trading standards, but one thing I do know is that if a shop displays goods as being at a certain price, then they have to be sold at that price. We went over to the shelf, I showed her the ticket that said a fiver a bottle. She saw it, noted it, still insisted their price was right.

Anyway, I stuck to my guns - to the extent that I flatly refused to move from the till until I got that wine for the price stated. I warned people not to form a queue behind me, since I could be some time. They went through the store hierarchy one by one, even brought over the head of the wine department (a snotty, rat-faced turd who insisted that Asda would "never" sell wine of this quality at such a price.) who all insisted the till price was correct. I kept telling them that this was against the law and asking for the manager. My g/f (patient, long-suffering and now my wife) was, as she kept telling me, mortified by the carry-on, muttering through gritted teeth "Just leave it, just leave it". Bollocks I would just leave it. This had gone way past the point of no return.

Eventually the manager arrived and (as I knew he would) heard a brief summary and simply said "Give it to him for a fiver." What else could he do?

So I got eighty-four quid's worth of wine for thirty-five pounds. I marched out of that store to the sound of trumpets ringing in my ears. A triumph for the common man, I thought. Victory for the oppressed Sancerre-swilling masses, I thought. A blow to the pockets of a grasping bastion of capitalism, I thought. The last laugh was mine.

Until I opened the first bottle and found it tasted like cat's piss. "Serves you fucking right," said the other half. I know - I should have taken it back, but the moment had gone and I couldn't be arsed. Oh, well...
(zebideedoodah likes florence but prefers venice, Mon 6 Sep 2010, 0:26, 6 replies)

Last meal
Once had a stunning dinner in a pub in a local town. Was sat there with wife, brother and his mate. Drinks bought for all four so wasn't a cheap affair. I opted for a guinness beef stew served in a hollowed out bowl bread roll (magnificent). As I smeared the final spoon of stew into my mouth I felt a strange nail on blackboard like scrap on my tooth. Upon closer inspection I removed a small stone from my mouth. Waiting on everyone to finish up I then happily (but looking suitably shocked) got the waitresses attention and informed her of said grit. She immediately offered a refund of my dish. I then reached into my mouth and began tweaking a tooth informing her I'd like to see the manager. Cue hushed conference behind bar and smiley manager offering entire meal and drinks for free and free deserts.

(I almost never carry small stones into restaurants now...)
( dazbrilliantwhites has been meaning to change this..., Sun 5 Sep 2010, 23:56, 3 replies)

When I worked in a restaurant a few years back....
...someone complained that there was something "hard" in her Chicken Tikka Massala - she thought it was a bone and wasn't particularly happy.

My manager gave a world-weary sigh and wandered back into the kitchen with the offending meal to give it a prod etc. and sort her a new one out.

Turns out it was a lump of glass about 1 inch square, and on further discovery the entire box of tikka massala packets we had in the freezer contained similar lumps - more glass than chicken in many of them.

The supplier's quality control checking system had failed and was not checking packets properly (using radiation to measure the density of stuff in the packets) and thus a load of "bad" packets had slipped through!

Click "I Like This" If you, like me, are wondering how the shuddering fuck glass got into the Tikka Massala in the first place?!?!!
( Mister B is eating an icanhazcheezburger with lmaonaise, Sun 5 Sep 2010, 23:00, 5 replies)

Last year my spare laptop stopped working unexpectedly one evening.....
... which was a minor inconvenience to say the least.

Long story short, the manufacturers of the cheap Advent label laptops that PC world sell were sent a batch of faulty motherboards which caused them to short - I needed to get an Engineers report from someone suitably qualified to confirm this and they would repair it all free of charge, and re-imburse me for the cost of the Engineers Report (£30 at the independent shop I used).

I have currently done this for my laptop and no less than 6 other laptops belonging to friends and family etc. over the past year, one for a (now) ex-girlfriend which I then sold on eBay after telling her it couldnt be fixed (call it Karma).

It was a faff on to sort out the first time, something a lot of people (considering the target market for the Advent laptops) wouldnt necessarily have gone through especially without some tech knowledge, but I take great pride in "sticking it to the man" whenever I get the opportunity!
( Mister B is eating an icanhazcheezburger with lmaonaise, Sun 5 Sep 2010, 22:49, Reply)

I complained
when my dessert in a restaurant in brighton had a bit of plastic in it. I told the waitress and she said she'd speak to the chef.
When she came back she told me the chef said it wasn't his fault, because it must have fallen out of the box he tipped the dessert out of. :-(
( browser still relating boring anecdotes into a void on, Sun 5 Sep 2010, 22:46, Reply)

Things you can do that will work ...
Another long time b3ta lurker here!

I have recently had two reasons to complain about products/service and I got success with both, so I thought I'd share this:


1. Trekking in a jungle 7,000 miles from blighty my brand new DSLR camera stopped working. When I got back home I angrily called the online company I purchased it from, whereupon they said that it was up to the manufacturer to issue a refund and refused to discuss the issue further.

I then rang the manufacturer and was given a little gem: All products in the UK are covered for 6 years against manufacturing defect! I wrote a polite letter to the online company making reference to Sale of Goods Act 1979, Supply of Goods and Services Act 1982, Sale and Supply of Goods Act 1994, The Sale and Supply of Goods to Consumers Regulations 2002 ... and they immediately gave me the option of having a full refund or replacement model.

Further reading: www.berr.gov.uk/whatwedo/consumers/fact-sheets/page38311.html

2. I was experiencing quite crappy signal quality from my mobile phone service provider. Previously I'd had perfect signal quality, but for weeks it had been poor. Endless calls to the useless customer support line failed to produce a result, so I wrote to the CEO.

Sounds crazy, but their email addresses are easily obtained (www.connectotel.com/marcus/ceoemail.html). I was called within 2 hours by someone from their management team, who assured me that they were looking into it. Three days later, the signal quality was perfect and I even got a follow up call a week later to check that everything was ok!

So ... complaining in this manner is not quite as fun as faxing a kitchen roll to an ISP support line (another story), but its worth doing. If you're going to complain, keep it short, professional and minimise the rant.

Happy complaining! :)
(osmium, Sun 5 Sep 2010, 22:34, 7 replies)

Complaints.
Working for a complaints department in a fairly large insurance firm
I have to put up with a lot of complaints with fuckwits of the general public. A lot of them are completely justified and I have every sympathy with a lot of the people I deal with. Sadly, a lot of chancers and pedants in the world have turned me into an angry cynic. So if you wish to complaint about how we're using an ampersand and not the word and, or if you feel we should display a warning sign before we show an image of a snake on a ruddy advert - then you should go take a fuck to yourself.
(baldylocks, Sun 5 Sep 2010, 22:33, Reply)

Failed exhaust fan in the shitter
First company I worked for...my cubicle was right outside the men's loo. There were a couple of guys that would go in there and render the place utterly uninhabitable for man or beast. That was OK when the exhaust fan was working...but when the thing died...oh my fucking god. Dan would go in there, sound like his intestines were exploding and come out with a satisfied smile. Meanwhile the funk would waft out of the shitter and into my cubicle. It was eye watering. After a couple of polite complaints got nowhere, the company happened to put up some sort of lame ass feedback box. I fed-back about the lack of a fan making it fetid and vile in my cubicle. The MD saw each of those feedback things...and 48 hours later the maintenance guy stopped nailing the cute Mexican chick in engineering long enough to come down and fix the fucking fan. As he walked out he kind of snarled at me that it won't be fetid any longer...
( HairyTwatter certified eel and sodium salesman, Sun 5 Sep 2010, 21:57, Reply)

dell
a mate of mine bought a dell p.c several years ago. it seemed to work fine, for the first two weeks. then it just stopped working altogether.
he sent it for repairs and was told it was fine. when he got it back, nothing had been fixed at all. he phoned several times to complain, but was told that, if he wasn't happy, he should send it back for repairs. hoping for a different result than the first time, he sent it back again.
3 weeks later, his p.c came back. the letter accompanying it said that they couldn't fix it, as they couldn't work out what was wrong with it. they neglected to explain why it now had a large scratch across the screen.
needless to say, my mate wasn't pleased. he tried phoning dell, but was placed on hold for so long that mushrooms* started to grow on the phone. he hung up and resolved to try again later that evening.
when he finally got through to someone, it was a young bloke who clearly wasn't impressed by his employers. he told my friend that, if it was considered a "minor" repair, nothing much would get done. however, if it was a "major" repair, or if the p.c was completely written off, they'd simply replace it with no questions asked. he finished the call by saying "it's a pity your p.c couldn't have a serious accident, isn't it?"
well, this got my mate thinking. he thought he'd find out if a dell p.c could fly.
it can't.
it can, however, land at the bottom of the stairs in a broken heap** that renders it effectively written off.
as promised, it was replaced within a week, no questions asked.

*this may not actually have happened
**the first time he threw it, it didn't get so much as a dent. they're stronger than you'd think.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 5 Sep 2010, 21:20, Reply)

Credit Crunch - Take the blame...
After facing immediate redundancy some years back, I got myself some emergency income working in the customer support centre of a large electrical retailer whose name rhymes with "Clomet".

It was my job to try and resolve minor problems with white & brown goods over the telephone if possible (Mr Angry, Can you ensure your washing machine is connected to the water supply), and booking an engineer if not or simply unfeasible (No Mrs 95 year old wheelchair user, I'm not expecting you to check the rear of your dishwasher- we'll get someone out to you ASAP).

I was always most empathetic with the majority of my customers- a lot of the appliances were mis-sold to unknowledgable customers by grease-ridden, truth-smiths who would frankly lie through their teeth in order to hit their sales targets.

Also alot of the appliances were shite and cheaply made.

Anyway, after unsucessfully being able to resolve one gentleman's washing machine that had somehow caught fire within 4 days, I looked to book the necessary engineer's visit required to write off the machine: I could understand the frustration of this gentleman, but disagreed with his conclusive statement....

Gent:"You are the type of person who has caused the economic climate our country faces today"....
Me: "Pardon me?"
Gent:"You young man are personally responsible for the country's economic downturn- Mr Credit Crunch"
Me: "...ok."

So yeah, sorry about this guys & girls - It's all my fault.
( the dalai farmer always likes tea, but especially on, Sun 5 Sep 2010, 19:52, 1 reply)

I tripped over a paving slab and took the council to court.
Imagine my horror at only getting £9,346.14 in compensation! I KNOW MY RIGHTS - UNDER SECTION 2 OF THE FOOT TRAJECTORY ACT (1903) I AM LEGALLY ENTITLED TO A MINIMUM OF £9,453.57 IN COMPENSATION! I AM! ME! ME! ME!
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sun 5 Sep 2010, 18:57, Reply)

Amsterdam
A couple of years ago, some friends and I were in Amsterdam to, er, experience the culture. Beginning our night out, we popped into a Mexican restaurant (when in Rome...) and all ordered drinks with our meal. The Dutch style is to give you a lager with a not inconsiderable head. Everyone accepted this; it's just the way they roll. Everyone except my friend M*ke, that is. He rants on about how unacceptable it is to be thusly short-changed, and demands a full glass, which is duly delivered to him.

So far, so... okay, I suppose. I don't drink, so I'm not really familiar with the social conventions around the fermented grain. However, the drinks we all ordered came free, courtesy of some vouchers our youth hostel gave us. My question is this: can you complain about something you get for free? Bearing in mind the complaint also addresses a local tradition?
( Pretender, Sun 5 Sep 2010, 18:00, 4 replies)

Pea alert
In 1996 she-who-must-be-obeyed decided she wanted a new car and duly chose a spanking new Rio Verde (green) pearlescent Vauxhall Corsa Premier 1.2. As she's a nurse, the car would regularly be parked on the shonky hospital car park, protected only by poor lighting and convicted sex offenders (a post for another time), so she opted to pay an extra £270 for the official Vauxhall alarm system that was Thatcham category 1 rated.

Unfortunately, the alarm was a dealer-fit item, and we subsequently discovered that they didn't know what they were doing.

The alarm was of the type that automatically armed 30 seconds after you got out of the car, and required you to reset it by going back into the car and pressing a dongle against a dashboard-mounted plate.

In practice, this meant that the missus just had time to park outside the house, lock the car, find her house keys and open the front door to the house, before the alarm set itself and immediately went off. At the end of a late shift, or in the early morning following a night shift, that made us very unpopular with the neighbours.

Over the course of the next couple of months, when we could spare the time from work, the car went back to the dealers five times. On each occasion, they completely failed to find any fault. In the end, I told them I wanted the alarm removed and a full refund.

They removed the alarm promptly enough, but pissed about when it came to giving us back the money. They claimed that they couldn't refund us until Vauxhall had approved the refund. Unfortunately for them, I knew enough of the law to know our contract was with the dealer and it was their responsibility to pay us back. It was irrelevant if they ever got their money off Vauxhall.

After seven weeks of snotty phone calls and snottier letters, we'd had enough. The dealer's premises was adjacent to a small council-owned pay & display car park, so we formed a plan.

As an impecunious, then childless, couple, our weekend days were often spend lazing around doing very little so we decided we'd park the Corsa next to the dealer's entrance and make a small protest.

We covered the car in balloons and mounted two big printed signs on it saying "(name of dealer)'s customer service is rubbish if you have a problem with your car" and "expect to fight to get your money refunded even if you're legally entitled to it" (or something like that). And we stayed there all day Saturday, and returned on the Sunday, passing the time by reading newspapers, writing out our Christmas cards and drinking Thermos coffee - oh, and chatting to numerous potential customers who came to find out what had pissed us off so much.

We were also approached a couple of times by staff asking if they could help, before they phoned someone senior and were obviously warned off. Before we left on the Sunday, we told them that unless we got our money back, we'd be there the following weekend too, and every one thereafter.

By a strange coincidence, the cheque was ready for us on the Monday, along with a letter saying they didn't want our business any more. Surprise, that.

Yes, I know it was a petty and fairly weak protest, but we felt better for it and, hopefully, contributed to them losing the Vauxhall franchise the following year.

Apologies for length, monster drugs, etc.
( Snappyuk gets BIGGER with free sample., Sun 5 Sep 2010, 17:28, 4 replies)

Got in my car the other morning...
...to find the teenage girl (with whom we have a bit of history) over the road *can* actually write, and had scrawled the words "Old Cunt" on the back window in dust.

So, my question is this: Does getting up specially at 4.30 in the morning to draw a large Speed Cock on her car windscreen, all the other windows, and the windows of her dad's work van, her brother's old banger and her mum's off-roader count as complaining?
( Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Sun 5 Sep 2010, 16:45, 4 replies)

Dear producers
of the movie Snatch...
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Sun 5 Sep 2010, 15:02, 1 reply)