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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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The sun is shining in That London and the brids are singing.
I got paid today and I have a curry for lunch. Not a bad day.
What are your weekend plans?
Alt: Favourite Saint? Lampito is doing her dissertation on St Augustine who is the patron saint of brewers. Sounds good to me.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:09,
184 replies,
latest was 14 years ago)
Those pesky brids
Not much planned for the weekend sadly, am busy trying to organise a small business opportunity though.
Alt: St Denis (my birthday saint) because of the weird story about him. St Augustine was a bit of a bastard
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:11,
Reply)
Oops, people from Bridlington in London singing.
Women love a bastard.
St Denis is said to have walked six miles after he was beheaded whilst preaching! Double hard.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:16,
Reply)
...in the boys' showers
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:25,
Reply)
Heading out with some work people tonight
I'm not sure about tomorrow, I may be rattling around in my flat looking for something to do if my friends from guildford don't get back in touch soon.
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Kroney, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:12,
Reply)
Where do you go out?
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:18,
Reply)
Probably just a couple of the pubs around work. Uxbridge.
It ain't pretty, but it's got beer in it.
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Kroney, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:20,
Reply)
I quite like Uxbridge.
I lived in Hammersmith for a year or so and it was somewhere to go.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:20,
Reply)
Having moved to Slough
I can categorically say that I've seen worse places than Uxbridge.
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Kroney, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:23,
Reply)
Is Slough a dump then?
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:28,
Reply)
I wouldn't want to go out there, put it that way.
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Kroney, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:31,
Reply)
I'm sure I went to a club in Slough once. When I was a lad.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:33,
Reply)
going home to see friends and family oop north
on the downside, my train doesn't leave euston until 8.40 so i am stuck later at work than a friday night would normally permit. gah.
who was the one who was stunning and got to shag loads of hot guys? or the one who rode around on a donkey drunk all the time? am i thinking of roman/greek gods/goddesses?
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:12,
Reply)
I don't know but I know want to ride a donkey drunk.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:19,
Reply)
I've ridden a few drunk donkeys in my time
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:30,
Reply)
Hahahaha.
Swampdonkeys.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:34,
Reply)
Euston-Macc?
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:29,
Reply)
no
they restarted the direct euston-wilmslow route a couple of years ago now. bloody marvellous for me, door to door in about 1h50!
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rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:31,
Reply)
Ahh, sweet
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:53,
Reply)
Pub for friend's birthday tonight, quiet day in tomorrow, doing some cooking
Quiet one, really.
Alt: Arnold of Soissons - Patron saints of Brewers also, it seems.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:12,
Reply)
I'm going to Woburn Abbey Deer Park tomorrow then out for the Mother in Laws birthday.
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Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:14,
Reply)
That's just down the road from me.
If you're looking for a good place for lunch The Woburn Brasserie is nice, or the black Horse if you're looking for (gastro) pub food.
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PsychoChomp, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:17,
Reply)
Don't go to the Loch Fine or the Bell, both look nice but they're not.
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PsychoChomp, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:20,
Reply)
Thank you for your advice.
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Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:21,
Reply)
Have fun, Woburn is lovely, you'll leave feeling like a povo though, it's full of very very rich people.
(
PsychoChomp, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:24,
Reply)
I always feel like a povo.
Except today I have a massive bundle of cash in my bag as I'm expecting the plumber to turn up to get paid at some point.
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Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:33,
Reply)
Mother in Laws birthday - bloody hell.
What did you get her? Parcel bomb?
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:17,
Reply)
I didn't get her anything
she's not my mother.
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Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:21,
Reply)
You should say "you're not my real mum" as often as possible.
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PsychoChomp, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:22,
Reply)
I didn't fucking marry you, did I? No?
Well shut the fuck up then, I'm watching Football Focus. Fucking mouthpiece.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:23,
Reply)
Mum's birthday, so off to hers for curry tonight.
Shit pub with indoor play area for kids tomorrow.
Alt: I dreamed I saw St Augustine alive as you or me, tearing through these quarters in the utmost misery.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:17,
Reply)
I'm describing my weekend through the medium of mime.
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PsychoChomp, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:19,
Reply)
Looks like fun.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:19,
Reply)
It's very good.
You need to exaggerate your facial expressions a bit more, but your 'the wind is dragging me along by my umbrella' motions are simply top notch.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:20,
Reply)
I don't know how he got into that glass box
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:22,
Reply)
Are you doing the gesture
where the finger and thumb of one hand makes a circle and the finger of the second hand goes in and out of the circle but sometimes you bang the sides because it's difficult to get the aim right?
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Kroney, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:21,
Reply)
That's not why I bang the side kroney old pal.
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PsychoChomp, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:22,
Reply)
Yeah
it's difficult to maneouvre a dead weight into the right position, I'd imagine. The one drawback of Chompy's special cocktails.
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Kroney, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:25,
Reply)
Wrap them up in a carpet, keeps the arms and legs from going all over the place.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:26,
Reply)
he meant the OUTside
not the INside
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rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:26,
Reply)
Sort of.
He's got the circle bit okay, but the other finger is bent over and every time it gets near the circle some liquid spurts out the end and then he cries.
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Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:22,
Reply)
this made me lol.
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PsychoChomp, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:25,
Reply)
And then he makes a face with the circle hand and mimes it saying
"it's ok, it happens to everybody, it's not a big deal"
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Kroney, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:26,
Reply)
The weekend will consist of trying to get our baby in to a different sleep routine. This will be difficult and will result in me getting very little sleep.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:20,
Reply)
How old is she now?
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:21,
Reply)
20 weeks.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:22,
Reply)
Yeah, it's getting time for her to settle into a good routine to let you get some proper kip then.
Good luck!
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:24,
Reply)
Thanks. Going to need it.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:25,
Reply)
*recommends brandy*
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:21,
Reply)
For me or the baby?
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:22,
Reply)
Both
Everybody's happy.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:24,
Reply)
AHAHAHA HAHAHA HAHAA
"sleep routine". Yeah, like that'll happen.
*weeps bitterly and reaches for more caffeine*
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crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:16,
Reply)
I know. We've tried several methods up to now without success.
This latest one is the wheeze of a "sleep consultant" that my wife insisted we use. At a cost of £200.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:17,
Reply)
My friend tried that with her baby,
£300 and it didn't work at all.
I've now gone 18 months without any more than 4 unbroken hours sleep. I am too tired to do anything other than co-sleep and breastfeed at night so I figure at some point she'll sleep better, it's just a matter of adjusting my expectations. I will not ever do any form of controlled crying
because it turns out I'm an attachment parenting hippy fucker.
Apparently the clever babies don't sleep well. Yeah, right - Catface's sister didn't sleep through 'til she was seven years old and she's thick as mud.
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crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:22,
Reply)
I should add that catfaceceilidhbaby is on the second hour of her daytime nap as I type.
I would not have thought that possible a couple of months ago. Somehow she just started napping properly (if I push the buggy round a bit to get her to sleep).
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crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:26,
Reply)
we're not having a problem with daytime naps.
It's nighttime. The baby won't sleep for more than an hour at a time at night and will only go back to sleep if on my wife's tit, even if not hungry.
Tried controlled crying (Ferber method) and hated it. Both of us are too soft to let her cry. We are going to try "spaced soothing" whatever that is.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:32,
Reply)
Try a dummy
It is cheaper
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:33,
Reply)
Tried that. Lasts about 2 minutes in favour of her thumb.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:34,
Reply)
This sounds very familiar.
I have exactly the same problem except my daughter is 18 months old and will on occasion sleep 2-3 hours before waking, crying, wanting a boob in her face. Much like her father.
I'm going to try this when I'm a little less exhausted:
drjaygordon.com/attachment/sleeppattern.html
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crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:38,
Reply)
Sounds similar to what we are going to try, except we will put her in her cot for it not in our bed.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:45,
Reply)
I'm too lazy to get out of bed and lift a child into a cot.
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crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:47,
Reply)
I will have to do this bit.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:48,
Reply)
There are no 'brids' singing round here.
1. I'm going to fuck your shit up big time, and not in a gay way.
2. I'm going to LOL about fucking your shit up
3. .....
4. Seeing my kid after she'd back from CHURCH on Sunday
5. Prophet
Favourite saint is Simon Templar obv, followed by Michael, patron saint of underpants
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:23,
Reply)
You wish you could fuck my shit up.
You lightweight.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:25,
Reply)
Dream on, sunshine.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:28,
Reply)
I wipe the floor with smalltrousers like you.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:31,
Reply)
Jesus Christ, just get a room already
You two are making me look like Evel Knieval's harder, braver brother who jumps over a million Honda Accords in the Flintstones' car
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:34,
Reply)
They're making me and Swipe look like an old married couple.
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Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:35,
Reply)
I tend to think of you and Swipe as kids in the playground
Everyone else can see that it's going to end in cataclysm-inducing sex, but you two aren't past the mutual seething hatred stage yet.
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:36,
Reply)
please please please
leave your sick fantasies out of this.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:51,
Reply)
Are fantasies about earthquakes really that sick?
The words "San Andreas Fault" are guaranteed to give me gigantic trouser eruption
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:55,
Reply)
She'll have to get in lne behind BGB.
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Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:53,
Reply)
Your argument is derailed instantly
by your use of 'get a room already' which makes you look like Evel Knievel's cousin, the one that they never talk about, the really bent one who quotes from 'Friends' all the time, thinks he's 'sassy' and has a chihuahua which he carries about in a 'man-bag'.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:03,
Reply)
Credit where it's due;
this is one of your more inventive gaycist comments.
You're still a fucking bender though.
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:06,
Reply)
Absolutely fuck all
Which is a) very rare and b) destined not to last. Ms Foxtrot is sure to think of something to intrude on my much-coveted Xbox time.
I can more or less guarantee dance practice, at least one session on the treadmill and lots of lusting after food I can't eat, if that helps. Oh, and Sherlock on Sunday night.
^PUNK^
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:25,
Reply)
I thought last week's Sherlock
was a load of rubbish. Hackneyed rubbish.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:27,
Reply)
I watched telly recently
It was shit.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:28,
Reply)
It's not called the idiot lantern for nowt.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:30,
Reply)
I agree, worst episode they've done
I usually like Russell Tovey, but he pissed me right the fuck off.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:30,
Reply)
The first one was good but last week was tedious and stupid.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:32,
Reply)
It was a bad choice of story: the original is one of Doyle’s weaker ones to start with.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:55,
Reply)
Is it you who can't stand Martin Freeman?
I'm sure a b3tan has taken his name in vain in the past and obviously I assume it was you
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:00,
Reply)
I think he's good in Sherlock
but I've only ever seen him in shit things before - he's 'meh' to me, I don't hate him.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:04,
Reply)
Not you, then
He is perfectly cast in Sherlock. A year from now he'll be the lead in the top-grossing film of the decade, and may end up a mite too big for his boots as a result.
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:05,
Reply)
Yep I'm with both of you on this
Very disappointing. I got the impression that Mark Gatiss wanted to create a horror story (he's a huge Hammer fan) but failed to translate it to the medium. Nonetheless every other episode I've seen has been excellent so am hoping for a return to form on Sunday.
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:32,
Reply)
In other news, I'm in an oddly vindictive mood
and feel strangely tempted to wind someone up with unkind words over on QOTW.
Who should post but apeloverage. Step away from the keyboard, Darth, he's not worth it...
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:35,
Reply)
i succumbed too
between this and chompy actually getting sex*, the potential for bitchiness is rife. RIFE, i tells you.
* - what he calls sex anyway
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rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:00,
Reply)
Annoyingly
yours was much better than mine
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:04,
Reply)
baby, it's always been that way between us
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rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:06,
Reply)
The sex you're having with me is better than the sex I'm having with you?
Agreed
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:08,
Reply)
St Jude.
He performs little miracles for me all the time and he once made someone invisible for my Nana.
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:37,
Reply)
He also takes sad songs and makes them better
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:03,
Reply)
i wish i could NOT laugh at this
i wish i could NOT be singing it even more
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rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:06,
Reply)
*punches the air triumphantly*
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:32,
Reply)
I'm going to sleep
lots and lots of lovely sleep, and a potter round the shops. Living the dream, man.
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berk, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:51,
Reply)
Dog walking and choosing paint.
I hate being old.
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girlinthehole, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 12:55,
Reply)
Going for a walk in the gorge today.
Spending the rest of the weekend marking, decluttering, and being grateful to the in-laws for babysitting while I mark and declutter.
Alt: St Anthony is very useful for finding lost things but St Patrick is the man - he drove the snakes out of Ireland and anyone who can drive with snakes in their car is pretty fucking cool. I'm quite a fan of St Brigid as well, she's quite the pagan-Christian crossover. St Hildegard of Bingen was a smart lady. None of the above, however, can compare to St Diana, Princess of Wales, the People's Corpse, 4eva in r harts.
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crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:00,
Reply)
lol at People's Corpse
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:03,
Reply)
Did 3 miles this morning.
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Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:05,
Reply)
I did 7km
Quite chuffed. Yes I know that's fuck all if I want to run a marathon.
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:09,
Reply)
No, it's the right amount you need to be able to run to commence training.
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Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:19,
Reply)
Is this marathon you're running the fuck-off difficult one?
With those "hill" things that everyone outside of Norfolk has heard of?
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:24,
Reply)
26.2 miles of Wiltshire cross country.
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crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:29,
Reply)
So that's a yes to hills
Not sure how to train for that round my way
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:31,
Reply)
Stairs make a great substitute for hills.
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crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:32,
Reply)
In all seriousness, I am properly up for this idea
Just to be able to say I've done it. Do you have the complete distances plan? Al sent me the first four weeks yesterday
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:43,
Reply)
Thank you kindly
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:53,
Reply)
It's quite american
but I've got about halfway through and it's got some useful stuff in it.
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Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:54,
Reply)
The best way to do it is to stop being such mincing bender and fucking get on with it.
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Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:32,
Reply)
That's your Internal Locust right there, al.
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crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:33,
Reply)
Yeah, I'll get right on that
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:39,
Reply)
I'm doing 3 miles tomorrow morning.
I sat on my arse and ate teacakes this morning.
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crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:12,
Reply)
I went to gym last night
but it was full of cunts and they wouldn't give me a towel and there were no treadmills free so I went home again and ate a large proportion of the remains of the tin of christmas biscuits.
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Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:18,
Reply)
That's fine, consider it early carb loading.
Think of those gym losers as we cross the finish line of the UK's toughest marathon. They will respect us then, oh yes.
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crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:24,
Reply)
I may have a picture of us printed on a T-shirt which I will wear to the gym and whenever anyone asks what the picture is of
I'll smack them in the mouth and say "YOU DON'T GET TO TALK TO ME BITCH YOU HEAR!!!??? YOU
DON'T GET TO TALK TO ME!!!" and then I'll kick the nearest bystander in the balls and walk out.
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Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:29,
Reply)
This is great, but make sure the t-shirt is lycra, yeah?
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crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:29,
Reply)
I no longer wear anything that isn't lycra.
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Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:30,
Reply)
As they dont make clothes in your size that dont stretch?
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:31,
Reply)
No idea
Might go shopping, might go to the pub. I might do both.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:01,
Reply)
Always good to leave your options open.
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girlinthehole, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:02,
Reply)
Isn't it just
Granted, if I get a fun packed offer I'll be all over it.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:07,
Reply)
Alt
Best saint is
St Fiacre
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Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:04,
Reply)
*looks him up*
*shrugs*
He looks alright, I suppose.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:12,
Reply)
I just like that
there is a saint of cock rot
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Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:51,
Reply)
Daughter's 5th birthday party on Sunday
This means filling party bags tonight and making lots of food on Sunday morning. I will also be painting the faces of 25 kids on Sunday (WITH SPUNK!)
Alt:
Have to agree with Monty. Simon Templar (but not Val Kilmer)
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:06,
Reply)
I was unaware that Kilmer had soiled the mighty Templar with his shitness.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:18,
Reply)
Film version
It was staggeringly poor.
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:19,
Reply)
Why do they insist on doing this?
Remake something which was shit, into something which isn't, for fuck's sake...
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:21,
Reply)
*hands Monty turd-polishing kit*
In the case of The Saint they rushed out a Hollywood version in the wake of the popularity of the Brosnan Bond films, retaining the premise but completely missing the point of the original show.
Seriously though, how would you make a decent big-screen version of Little Britain?
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:26,
Reply)
By making it a silent black and black film
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:29,
Reply)
By making it a snuff torture film in which David WILLIAMS* has his eyelids cut off with a rusty scalpel
and then that fat bent cunt is forced to eat them, before having a grenade shoved into his flabby face immediately afterwards.
*I'm not playing his stupid 'Walliams' game.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:31,
Reply)
I would watch this until the DVD wore out
Then I'd buy a new one
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:31,
Reply)
I keep seeing him on panel games and his 'ooh I'm gay, NOT REALLY!!!' act is truly sickening in its tedium.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:32,
Reply)
THIS^
Saying that, his missus is a right moose
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:33,
Reply)
Agreed
He's not fooling anyone, but what I find perplexing is that he gets asked back. He's not even remotely funny. He never has been.
(
Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:37,
Reply)
Why DO they ask him back?
I saw some of that 'Quiz of the Year' thing presented by Jimmy Carr and Williams and that equally unfunny beast Miranda Hart were excruciating. Jamie Oliver was funnier than both of them put together, and not just for his downsy face.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:42,
Reply)
And he wasn't in the least bit funny - just not actively unfunny.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:43,
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The fact that Jamie Oliver out-lolled Walliams and Hart should make them stop
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:43,
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I agree with every aspect of this
He seems to be on it every year and has previously taken the "quiz" aspect, and trying to win, far too seriously and thrown some fairly spectacular hissy fits. This year I think he honestly believed he was mocking the concept of the quiz by playing the joker. The least funny joker EVER.
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:45,
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POTYear
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:34,
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Every year is POT Year for Monty
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:34,
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Why thank you.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:40,
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The year's only 13 days old mate
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:45,
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Yes, Monty
Just like the boy tied up in my shed
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:50,
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I decided it wasn't funny and I stand by that decision.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:52,
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You were actually spot on
Any older than that and they're too loose for my tiny penis
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:56,
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Officechortle.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:58,
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The disguises were about the only good part
And that mental suit that made him look like The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:27,
Reply)
Sawing willows down on an island in the Ouse.
well, that's Sunday. Saturday will be quiet and snuggly.
Alt: St Bastard, the patron saint of bastards and traffic wardens. Nutted his executioner on the way to the scaffold, and kicked to death 12 meek people to hurry their way to paradise.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:32,
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The Ouse?
You're not... LOCAL, are you?
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:39,
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He's not local to you, no.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:41,
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I'm not local to anyone, unless I make the effort.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:42,
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Great Ouse just upstream from Bedford.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:41,
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As opposed to the Shite Ouse in Norfolk
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:42,
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That's the one. and the Little Ouse that goes through York.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:43,
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Little Ouse?
That thing floods at the drop of a hat!
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The Luggage is haunted..., Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:46,
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They should make it bigger then.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:47,
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It's in York.
Fat chance of that. Unless you count a dredging program.
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The Luggage is haunted..., Fri 13 Jan 2012, 14:18,
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Ah
More local than most of these miscreants but still bloody miles away
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:48,
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I prefer it that way.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:49,
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Family stuff, so the usual for that.
Hopefully booze will be involved somehow. I may go and stare at the gym for a bit.
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The Luggage is haunted..., Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:42,
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Hahahaha
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:51,
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Hahaha that's excellent
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:56,
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I like the point that weeds got a lot stronger since polititians decided to stop smoking it.
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PsychoChomp, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 14:00,
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I love the Daily Mash.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:52,
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In other news: Channel 4 is currently broadcasting a film entitled: I was Monty's double.
I dare not watch it as I assume it is the most sordid tale of misery, drugs and poverty ever filmed. With the worst soundtrack EVER.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:44,
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It's an excellent film actually.
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PsychoChomp, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:46,
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DID YOU KNOW
The man who plays Monty and Monty's double in 'I was Monty's Double' was the man who was Monty's double?
I've posted this before.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:48,
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I DID KNOW THAT
He won the war that man WON THE WAR!
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PsychoChomp, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:49,
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He sho' nuff did.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:50,
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Too many Monty's in this post for my liking
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:53,
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No such thing, old boy.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:55,
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Even Barry Norman said it was "Utter Shit."
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:46,
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Barry Norman sells his own brand of pickled onions through Sainsbury's.
The label has a pic of his face, and the label is edged like a strip of film.
WHY?????? Are pickled onions a popular cinema snack these days or something? EH????!!!!
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:50,
Reply)
As well as being a film critic, he has the largest collection of shallots in the world.
He is probably just offloading them now.
I'd try them, if they ever get up to Bedfordshire.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:55,
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He wanted to buy more, but his wife said 'no Bal, that's shallot' and sold some to Sainsbury's.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:57,
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SORRY.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:57,
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Leave the internet.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 14:00,
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No need to apologise, I rarely reach such heights myself.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 14:00,
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Sleeping.
I shall also be going on an Old London walk fro Tower hill, which should be nice as I don't know that side of the river as well. On Sunday I'm hopefully going for a little ride with friends, oh and sleeping more. I may try to squeeze some beer into all this somewhere... Oh it's a hard life! but I deserve it after the hectic futility of this week.
Alt: St Roota
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CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 13 Jan 2012, 13:54,
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Sunday evening will involve packing my suitcase.
The rest will be spent on tenterhooks.
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Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 13 Jan 2012, 14:02,
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Good luck with that.
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CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 13 Jan 2012, 14:02,
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