Old boy young boy
2 words - Gethin Charles. His parents were about 70 so he didn't have much of a chance bless him, definitely not all there upstairs, and physically resembled a pensioner. Watching him run the cross country was a spectacle to behold.

He used to eat a sandwich and immediately drink from a bottle of pop before emptying his mouth, thus leaving 'floaties' in his drink. the closer to the bottom he got, the more it looked like an overcrowded goldfish bowl.

I still recall the day someone took a swig.......shudder........

And he supported Everton, which let's be honest is quite odd.
(RickGrimes Quite frankly, disappointed on, Tue 23 Jan 2007, 8:18, Reply)

Another one
I went to a junior high with special programs for kids with mental/physical disabilities, as well as kids with behavioural disorders. One who fell into the latter category we shall call Mike Harboway, as he's a cunt who probably doesn't know how to use the Internet anyway.

One day, we were all outside for phys ed class. At that moment we were standing around in the field, unorganised. I was with my best friend Greg. I turned and saw Mike Harboway behind him, winding up to throw a rock, with a look of pure loathing on his face. The rock hit my best friend in the head. Mike said "I was aiming at a bird." No you fucking weren't.

Another time, I was forced into a group activity with Mike Harboway, as well as Shauna, a class bitch (who later had all her friends turn on her and was chased out of the school for good), and another Mike who was actually more sociopathic than Harboway. Let's call him Mike S as I think that was his last initial. Mike S had a vial of pills he offered to Mike Harboway. "Try them, man. They make me feel good. They make me feel high." Credit to Harboway, he turned them down. "Sorry, I don't know what they are." Shauna took one look at the vial and laughed. "Those are period pills!" (her exact words, so I can only assume what they were.) So this guy was dealing estrogen to his friends. Nice one.

Mike Harboway was pulled from class in December one year. I ran into him a week later in the grocery store and he was quite friendly with me. "I'll be back in class next week, so see you then."

He wasn't back next week. He was gone for most of the rest of the school year. When he returned about five months later, he was about twice as fat as before (used to be skinny) and three times as violent.

The transition into high school didn't go well for Mike Harboway. Where before he impressed people by doing psychotic things (like throwing a banana down a kid's shirt and then mashing it), there was no demand for his brand of shenanigans.

The last time I remember seeing him, he was standing outside the doors in the area where everyone smoked. The bell had just rang and he and I were the only ones left. "Hey man," he called. I said hi and looked impatient. "Check this out," he said, picking a still smouldering cigarette butt off the ground. He put it in his mouth and had a toke. I tried to walk past him. He laughed and dropped the cigarette. "No, just kidding."

You put the cigarette in your mouth and inhaled. That's not joking, that, my friend, is doing. And it's how you'll be remembered.
(racetraitor has an alibi for, Tue 23 Jan 2007, 8:05, Reply)

B**d**n again....
He managed to get the other kid's approval by sneaking off from a class with one of the teacher's non-removal orange felt tip pens and scout about for a possible target. He found it up one of the staircases outside an abandoned classroom shining; an unspoilt canvas wall. As quick as a b3tan, he began to draw.

Imagine the delight on the face of Chinwig, one of the odd maths teachers (who was as gay as the French) who'se classroom was directly above this flight of stairs, when he was confronted face-to-face of a 6 foot mural of him smoking a bong while holding his cock in his free hand.

The cleaners couldn't remove it no matter what they tried, and the mural lasted a few months before they re-painted the entire staircase.

After that B**d**n had been awarded exempt from bullying for the rest of his time in that school, and lived like a king.
( Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Tue 23 Jan 2007, 7:44, Reply)

The Trainspotter
We had this one bloke, and he had three distinct qualities - He was Giant, about seven foot tall, had an abnormally large head, and he was a mad as a bag of hammers. Interestingly, He had an incredible, encyclopaedic knowledge of trains - beyond your usual train-spotter, he knew every train the the Public transport fleet by the markings and graffiti on them.

Being the kind, understanding children we were he was mostly picked on, until the day he hit the principal with a desk, at which point he got more thumbs up than a fingerless gynaecologist.
(Churba, Tue 23 Jan 2007, 7:16, Reply)

Weirdo and his twin brother
There was this kid in my primary 5 class...with a slight IQ deficiency who would talk weird and sing weird songs to himself. News also got out that his mom still cleans his butt after he does his business in the toilet. God knows why he ended up in 'normal' primary school.

Anyways, he had an elder twin brother who was an equal nutter but got retained a year for failing his exams. We would trash younger weirdo around until his elder brother came to his rescue and then trash him as well. What horrible, horrible kids we were.

We parted ways and about 2 years ago, i read in the newspaper that elder weirdo knifed somebody 14 times in the middle of a crowded shopping mall for pranks the victim said to him about 4 years before the incident. He was sent to the asylum for schizophrenia.

I wonder when it'll be my turn :)
(deven_shire, Tue 23 Jan 2007, 6:53, Reply)

The kid who relished Bogies...
Every storytime all through my primary school years, Neil Kingshot would rumage... digging for treasure like Jack Sparrow on speed. Generally I would ignore this behaviour as my churning stomach would win out over my morbid fascination of his bogie sculpting, eating and flicking. But on one rainy afternoon - well into cold season - I saw Neil's love of snot peak. He sneazed - and enormous amounts of milky green snot exploded in a spider like webb over about two thirds of his face. First he tried to wipe it away with the back of his hand, realising there was just too much of it, he braced himself and sucked the entire lot back up his nose. How he got all that snot back up there was beyond me, unfortunately when he was about 14 he went out with my sister so I was reminded of that bile stirring afternoon everyday for about 6 months. Finally she dumped him, apparently he ate he ear wax too, which my sister sadly discovered whilst at the cinema.

Ewwwwwwww
(Beejster, Tue 23 Jan 2007, 4:48, Reply)

I went to school with a superhero
The story starts back when I was in grade nine, the final year of Canadian middle school. There was this big fat kid a grade younger than me who was one of the many laughing stocks of the school. Matt was easily the fattest person in the school, spoke with a lisp, and had a high temper. It was pretty often you'd see him fighting someone, though he always lost and always looked like a fool. Once I passed by the wrestling room and saw a kid half his size wrestling Matt. The guy was winning simply by staying out of Matt's reach and taunting him to chase him around the wrestling mat. Oh, did I mention Matt was so heavy, he had to use a walking stick to get around? A walking stick being unavailable, he would often use a ski pole or fishing rod.

Let's fast forward two years. I've switched to high school and already finished off one year, so now Matt is entering my high school.

People started talking around the school about "Powerman." They all had stories like "Powerman ran into my science lab today and threatened to punish all evildoers" or "Powerman made me pay homage to his superpowers." I heard these stories for a month before I finally saw him for myself, and yes it was giant Matt, wearing a (Canadian) football helmet, welding gloves, a cape, and a crystal visor. He would waddle through the school coming out with all sorts of comical phrases, "Up up and away! Oh yeah, forgot--can't fly!" Everyone in the school had a story about him.

Around that time I decided to approach him for an interview. I found him in the lunch room, and when I asked him, his eyes lit up. "Is it for the student paper?" I shrugged. "Sure." Later I took the interview to the student paper, but they refused to publish it because it would encourage him.

Powerman was a great person to interview. He told me his weight and all his speech and social problems are due to some ADHD prescription drugs he's on (maybe Tom Cruise was right). He used to get beaten up every day of his life, but since he started wearing the Powerman costume, nobody had touched him; they must have all thought he was doing a good enough job of humiliating himself without their help. He told me "Power Day is coming," which the guidance counsellor stepped in and told him he could never do.

Powerman and I became friendly toward each other. I still laughed my ass off at him, but that's what he wanted. He graduated a year after me, and I heard the teachers were planning on not letting him walk across the stage for his commencement because they were afraid what he would do. After he graduated he went through a series of job placement programs for the physically disabled. He got a job at a lollipop factory or something and I didn't see him for a while.

Then he tried to become a street performer at the annual Fringe festival. He revealed to the world that, despite being enormous, he is extremely flexible, and billed himself "The world's fattest contortionist." A year later, he got into stand-up comedy. The only two times I saw him on stage he cracked me up so hard ("Do you think a dentist dies a little inside every time he gets a gummer from a hooker?") Shortly after he was voted "funniest working man in the city."

With his contortion abilities, he was recruited into the Jim Rose Circus, a famous American travelling freak show. He has toured England, Ireland, Iceland, Australia, and all through the US. Today, he is probably the most famous person I know from school. You can have a look at his website here. fatbend.com/

So I want to take the time to say "Hey guidance counsellors! You were wrong!"
(racetraitor has an alibi for, Tue 23 Jan 2007, 2:36, Reply)

I wouldn't say I was the weird kid in class
but unfortunately everybody else would.
(Fatima Whitbread's hardon drugs and the causes of drugs, Tue 23 Jan 2007, 2:22, Reply)

Classic Weird Mate at School
One of the lads I was at school with in the eighties and early nineties:

* Got caught by his mum shagging a home made practice doll made of six pillows and a cushion. To make it worse, he had stretched a pair of her black stockings over the "legs" and put her bra on the two pillows which made up the body. Also, he told us about it in a fit of tears.

* Asked me once, in a bout of concern, whether he could get AIDS by drinking his own spunk. Later admitted to it.

* Admitted to encouraging his dog to lick his date whilst wanking.

* Was so into Dungeons and Dragons, he believed that orcs really existed "in South America" until he was about 16.

Good guy, but some weird habits and the willingness to tell everyone about them. Ended up a personal trainer, somewhat worryingly. Wonder if he still uses the old practice doll trick?
(Mandrill, Tue 23 Jan 2007, 2:01, Reply)

Far too many to list them all...
I think I was the weird kid in primary school. Went to a posh school, where all the kid's parents drove merc's and bmw's and the like. My dad drove a Leyland P-76.

High school I went to the dodgiest private school in the state, where all the kids who got kicked out of the good schools (yes, plural per child) ended up. We had:
- The kid who decided taking acid would be a good idea. Was for him, didn't even get busted.
- The kid who showed us how to knot leg hairs. That bloody hurt, but I wasn't too bright then (don't rub your hairy knee when bent then extend it rapidly).
- The kid who was heavily into death metal, and a complete loon. Has a crazy east-european-sounding last name, has changed it since to 'Carson'. Met him in a pub a few weeks back, he's still a loon. I think we put him in a rubbish bin once.
- The multiple psychopaths we had. One threw a stool (about 2/3 as tall as we were at the time) at another kid, nearly broke his back. Same one also carried a scalpel in his bag until he sliced his finger in physics one day.
- A good friend of mine, who was very much into stabbing people with stationery. Stabbed me with a pen, hit a vein or something, my entire sleeve was covered with blood within a minute. He stabbed my other friend with a compass one day, got his wrist, friend bled all over the desk. Dinner plate sized puddle of blood before he noticed.

All the others I'll not list, for I have plenty of length already. Girth's ample, too.
(jair, Tue 23 Jan 2007, 1:37, Reply)

erm
There was a guy at my school who liked to be called the general. We went to a naval secondary school, and at night he'd put on his lid (navy speak for your posh uniform hat), push the house cripple on his bed and repeatedly fully-clothed hump him, usually climbing off the rotund raspberry with a raging boner clearly visible through his trousers. He was also incredibly violent and strong, so complaining about his latent homosexuality and rage issues usually resulted in a proper shoeing.

There was also an older guy at the same school whose name was Dougal. Apparently Dougal (who was a little odd-looking to say the least) approached a girl at the school disco and asked her to dance. She totally rebuffed him, only for him to shuffle off into the corner of the dark room, hide amongst the girl's coats and fucking knock one out.

It makes me laugh thinking about it to this day.
(thejazzassassin, Tue 23 Jan 2007, 0:10, Reply)

Doesn't need much explaining...
I went to school with a lad who shagged a horse archive.thenorthernecho.co.uk/2001/3/6/177298.html
( GeordieSteve, Mon 22 Jan 2007, 23:48, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/users/profile.php?id=16397
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Mon 22 Jan 2007, 23:40, Reply)

phsyco
He shall remain nameless but he was a full bore nutcase,history lessons where markedly unpleasent esp if teach was late turning up cos said loon would thus proceed to beat the crap out of anyone he didnt like the look of.

However his crowning glory ( in his eyes no doubt ) was cobbing a half breeze block across the classroom-narrowly avoiding the crust of a unfortunate/fortunate fellow pupil,last i heard of him he was doing time.
(shug, Mon 22 Jan 2007, 23:13, Reply)

The weird kid was my first love
His name was Aaron. He had what they called 'behavioural difficulties'. He had a wonderful knack for getting in shit in any and every given situation.

Him being the class clown and me being a precocious little smart arse, we never really interacted until, at some point between the ages of 9 and 11, we were sat next to each other in the hope that my angelic behaviour would rub off on him. We bonded over our love of drawing comics and videogames. Our tables had to choose names for reward chart purposes, and ours was christened Pikachu Table.

I got into Pokemon because of him. We went to a convention together. I dressed up as Misty.

I developed something of a crush on him and he spent hours drawing me intricate pictures of various Pokemon. I shepherded him, sitting next to him on the bus to swimming so he wouldn't get in trouble for fighting or spitting or swearing or generally going a bit mental.

I had to stand against the dining hall wall by myself during morning break for the FIRST TIME EVER after we got caught drawing some kind of bizarre S&M-style comic involving nudity and violence. Aaron told the teacher he'd made me do it, and she believed him, probably because she didn't think I had it in me to be so rude.
(clumsyeloquence is a girl, Mon 22 Jan 2007, 23:08, Reply)

The kid with scars
Basically, he had loads of scars, looked like harry potter, wanked in history and came up some fat girl's leg. Legend.
(isketchmaster, Mon 22 Jan 2007, 22:45, Reply)

Some lad
Some lad in my school was able to hold his breath until he fainted.

This came in handy for tests, shit lessons, days off etc.

But i think the lack of oxygen to his brain confuddled him and he ended up turning into a spacker.

One lesson he wanted to go home so he did his usual, but this time as he fainted he shit himself. And them another weirdo kid went right up to his arse, im talking nose touching here, and sniffed up then puked all over him.

I was so glad i turned up to school that day to be one of the privileged few who witnessed it.

The same lad in a school swimming lesson walked out of the changing rooms bollock naked with his arm up in the air (as you do when you address a teacher) and told the teacher he had no swimming trunks. In front of the entire swimming pool and two classes from our school.
(PieEater, Mon 22 Jan 2007, 22:37, Reply)

so i was a bit of an odd-ball myself
especially in primary school, but i'm in my second year of A-levels now, and i like to think i've found a degree of normality. of course, i barely compare to some of the people i've met in the past...

primary school people:

cherlina - she decided she was obsessed with me when i was in year 4 and she was in year 5, which continued for the rest of the time we were at school together. she's write my name in the back of all her exercise books, and tell everyone how great she thought i was. she smelled musty...

danny robinson - prick.

jiree - jiree was epileptic, and one of the major triggers for his episodes were being too hot or cold. of course, he was also thick, so he would go out on 95oF summer days, and play football in the playground. then he'd have a fit, and have to go home for the day. i swear it was deliberate. and he would do this, three, maybe four times a week in the summer. knob.

secondary school:

big john - one day in year 8 science, john decided to put the hydrochloric acid he'd been given for an experiment into the fish tank. a few other people in the class decided this should be punished, so chased john round the room. he jumped out of the window and ran across the playground to hide. when apprehended by the head teacher, he was questioned on his activities. in response to why he put acid in the fish tank: "it was an experiment, to see if the fish would survive", and why he climed out of the window? "it was an experiment sir. i wanted to see if a fat person could get through the window..."

joe peschu - joe had down's, poor lad. he would spend his break times kicking an empty plastic bottle around. if anyone tried to touch his bottle, they would be told to "ff'k 'ff... b'str'd...". bless him. he disappeared after year 9.

BJ - noone actually knew BJ's name, so he was just BJ. he also had down's, and i think he was deaf, so his sole means of communcation was a series of whale like moans, high-pitched and that.

dominic "dodgey" wiley - a ture legend was our dom. he had aspurger's, so for most of years 7, 8 and 9, he was a very quiet person, saying very little. however, he took up drama in year 10, and suddenly became very loud. at was at this point that we all disovered he had a very strong sheffield accent, which was hilarious, us all being south east londoners. think a really, really belligerent alex turner. we also discovered his love of wanking at this point, and what a sexual deviant he was. and he got obsessed with communism. last i heard he was on a boat with his uncle or something...

tony burns - tony was a little ratty kid, with watery eyes and a really big coat. he would always say annoying, stupid shit, and everyone hated him. one time he told a good friend of mine (who he didn't know) that he would make sure she got a good funeral...

pavlin and ridvan - kosovan refugees, who were always trying to flog you a scratched up playstation game or fight someone... ridvan had a really flat head at the back...

claire - she wanked off our mate junii, in a music lesson. well, i say wanked off, it was more that she touched his leg, and before she got to his knob, he'd spluffed. we called him "gone in 60 seconds" and "2 minute man" for ages after that...

college (where i am now):

corrina - a fat beast; she looks like blanka from street fighter... she was in my english class, and while studying much ado about nothing, i said, jokingly, "yeah, leonato calls hero a ho-bag skank!". she responded "REALLY?! raw..." i groaned. worse than this was when she turned round to my mate luke in psychology and said "can you smell that?". he looked quizzical and she said "can you smell it? my period?". she stood up and said "eurgh, i can feel it trickling out of me... can you see any on my chair?". luke claims he can't remember any more than this, because he'd blacked out.

freaks of a sort, all of them.

i've got a really big knob.
(notjustahatrack peeling a sausage..., Mon 22 Jan 2007, 22:24, Reply)

Stedham pointyheads.
Right. Year nine, a Kid called Nathan tried to strangle himself because his nan 'hated' him. Richard, who sat next to him, tentaively put his hand up to inform the teacher, so we all turned around to witness a pathetic 13 yr old in hysterical tears.
Also, Jonathan Pegg, who eats raw potatoes and kicks himself in the head if we beg him to.

Tom MC Pies Chicken Boy Roose is another weird kid in class. He is really fucking obese, and never pulls his trousers up. On his first day in year 11, when asked who he was, he said "Nurr, I'm a fucking chicken."
I didn't understand the logic, but whatever.
And going back to never pulling his trousers up, in Biology, we dismantled a biro and dropped it down his crack. It stayed in there, before we got more daring, and forced it down further with a book and put the rest of the pen in there. When he did notice, he waddled off to the loos to cry.
He tells me how he is used to the wind and the rain, because he lives on the coast and his house gets sprayed with salt water and its is cold and windy on the coast, so he is used to it, and his house is only 2 houses away from the coast.

Amy Patterson OD's on diet pills and tried to hang herself with her school tie.

And then there are various stereotypical teenagers that we enjoy ripping it out of. Emo's, goth's, chavs, Stedham pointy head incest, and the family of pikeys who all got preggers at 13. Niiiiice
(Cuntstuble, Mon 22 Jan 2007, 22:16, Reply)

oooo...oooo...oooo...I know!
There were a couple - but that'S normal, I mean christ it was in "St James' School" in Grimsby (you know you're there when you see a twelve year old pushing a pram).

Anyway, there was the American kid two year's below who as an utter star wars freak (i mean i like star wars but...come on) and liked to say "I'm really experienced and I like to play with my star wars action figurines". His classmates bullied him mercylessly and liked to drive him insane. Once every now and then he'd wave a hockey stick around in fury and once almost killed one of my mates who was running by, missing his head by meer millimetres. It was hilarious.

Then there was Greg who was in the boarding house with me, his classic line was uttered when we were all talking bout football shirts one night. He suddenly just said "My dad bought a blue shirt once", causing a stunned silence. Or how about the time he got sent out of german to go see the head and he shouted "WANKER!" through the window, with the appropriate handmovement? Great stuff. Whenever he did something against the rules he'd scream about how unfair it was that he got punished. He was scared of daddy long-legs. He'd leave the lid down, close the windows and not flush when he had a particularly large turd (often enough). Even more worrying: there was never any bogroll in there with the poo if you were the unlucky finder of his act of terrorism. Best of all though is the time he shat himself wanting to fart during the film gladiator. He cut his laugh short durin the fart and walked out like a cowboy. Noone would have said anything had he not put his dirty kecks in the washbag with everyone else's stuff.

Steve, the canadian chinese boy, who we used to run away from for fun cos he was an utter psycho and would chase us round the school. Once when we were hiding in the bushes and moved a little he turned to us and screamed in his merkin accent:"WAIT! I HEAR TREE-SOUND!"
He once stood with a bottle of deo aiming at our doorm's entrance waiting for Sven (one of the biggest arseholes who'd been pissing him off all night) - for at least 2 hours. He didnt move at all. He as like a statue. And he brushed his teeth with the frequency usually reserved for guitar strings or something.

ANd james of course who could fart for over 20 seconds (yes. in one tone).

rarrrr length....
( morrybyte made a subtle namechange at, Mon 22 Jan 2007, 21:15, Reply)

So_I'm_Cynical
You'd think, going to one of the best grammar schools in the country, that you'd know how to spell fascist... I'd be after some of your money back...
( PMGT -Bacon., Mon 22 Jan 2007, 21:11, Reply)

Not a student
But a particularly strange Chemistry teacher.
Still teaches me. Fantastic teacher, but a complete and utter loon.

Relates most answers to Star Trek and all answers are responded with 'xxxxxxxxx' - ish. As if he doesn't really know the answer.

One of the more memorable Q/A was.

Q. So what does the thermal decomposition of Sodium Nitrate produce?

A. Oxygen and Sodium Nitrite..like..site...ish.

Strange man. Great though.
(Arse Biscuits The question is not who, but why?, Mon 22 Jan 2007, 21:04, Reply)

I was the weird kid
I used to go around my class telling everyone that if an icecream vans music is playing it means it's run out of ice cream.
(Charlietron Still can't think of anything witty to put here, Mon 22 Jan 2007, 20:39, Reply)

At Uni
....One guy called... Michael Hooper...Was a very annoying mature student at University (Marjon 92-95) luckily only had one lecture with him- he had boggly eyes and a whole 'body twitch' whereby he would blink like mad and shake his leg- This guy could not sit still for a nanosecond...He owned a holiday camp type thing in Cornwall and got into the Daily Mirror for its pisspoor condition (mould mice damp etc) A mate called Teresa worked there for a bit but had to leave because of her fear of mice and the complaints from customers-For example:
Cust- Hullo have you got my booking?
Ter-Er no I'll just look in the file...
Cust-Isn't it on the computer?
Ter-Er what computer????

When we did our exams we did them all together in a HUGE sports hall in exactly the same seat order as our admission...So the same poor sods had to sit next to this twitching loon for ALL their exams over 3 years ..My mate Chris recons this cost him a grade because of this....
(archstanton The gold is next to me....leave me be, Mon 22 Jan 2007, 20:14, Reply)

used to be a kid who
could burp and bring up a mouthfull of puke and used to show it to you. More probably envied than thought of as being weird. I guess the weird bit was that he swallowed it again.
Last seen in chef whites (hmm tasting all that food!)

Nob gag here....somewhere.....
(i AM that masked man Book him Tonto, Mon 22 Jan 2007, 19:59, Reply)

One, Two and Three
Were I kid you not the names of three kids at my old school.
The CHILD PSYCHOLOGIST parents believed that they should not give their children names and that they should be able to choose them themselves.

Of course they forbade the children from being allowed to name themselves until they were 16. i.e. they were of age to have decided on a good and sensible name for themselves.

As of yet only One has a proper name, which shall not be mentioned here. Two and Three are still, Two and Three.

They called themselves different names at school sometimes but officially on registers passports, birth cirtificates and other oficial documents, they are, in order of age.

One, Two and Three.

(I believe they are fairly normal apart from the shit that they had to put up with in school)

~If you click I like this and PM me I'll give them your suggestions for names~

/Obligatory length joke
(Arse Biscuits The question is not who, but why?, Mon 22 Jan 2007, 19:59, Reply)

Where to start
- The boy who wrote "Acid makes me smile" in his own shite on the cubicle wall
- The geek who carried a TV tube around in his bag
- The unfortunate who's parents had decided the best way to bring up their offspring was in a cave (Sawney Bean, sans cannibalism - dunno about incest mind - plenting of looting though)
- The hostel pupil who quite literally wanked for coins
- The other hostel pupil who rammed his cock into a pre-made hole in the desk (whilst lessons continued unabated) whilst proclaiming he was building up a jizz collection

Christ only knows we were spoilt for choice in the North of Scotland in terms of freaks, the above are but a few.
(mymilkshakebringsallthemongstotheyard poison hearts, poison minds - joining hate, Mon 22 Jan 2007, 19:39, Reply)

My cousin...
...rides a unicycle.

'nuff said.
(littlenipple hate's bad grammar, Mon 22 Jan 2007, 19:21, Reply)

Not a weird kid, but the entire class
A story once passed down to us from our English teacher;

He was taking a class of the dropouts, who pretty much failed everything they did. But for some unknown reason, they'd taken to him and actually started to focus strongly on their work. They weren't any good at the work, but they were good thick lads who at least tried, which is what counts at the end of the day.

One day, teach gets them to read a chapter of the book of the term, and glances out of the window. He notices that a few slappers from the neighbouring "girls-only" school were standing in our "boys-only" yard flashing all thier bits while screaming "Come and get it lads!!!" as loud as they could. Pre-mentioned English Teach foams at the mouth and runs to the window shouting "Christ, look at this lads, they're flashing everything there, dirty slappers.....lads?"
The thickos say pretty much nothing and all continue to read, completely engrossed in thier coursework. Thick bastards.
( Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Mon 22 Jan 2007, 19:19, Reply)

there's this
kid in my year who weighed in at 106kg in year 8 in our physics lesson, he has grown up and out since and stands just under 6 foot. im not a particular fat fachist so ive never made a point of his weight. We're in year 11 now approaching GCSEs, this kid (fat matt) draws trains in lessons, my latest glimpse of his creations today were entitled "little western". He's been doing this since year 7 and idles over trains every hour of his most likely to be short life. furthermore, we attend one of the best grammar schools in the county, but matt, is only aiming for Cs in maths and English at GCSE and is then cottoning off to work for south west trains at whatever he weighs then. This fetish for piston driven locomotives has completely socially isolated him and for at least the last 2 years has been talking to himself, he also has some mild spasm meaning his head is constantly jerking up and down.

No apology for length, matt can be held to account for this dimension... so maybe i'm a bit of a fat fachist.
(so_im_cynical, Mon 22 Jan 2007, 18:12, Reply)