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afternoon

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 11 Dec 2025, 16:00, Reply)
Prove it.

(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 16:01, Reply)
HIYA!

(dampdirtynonce The Real Spanishfly, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 16:16, Reply)
pretty much evening

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 17:32, Reply)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 6:42, Reply)
Bollocks

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 6:44, Reply)
You would say that

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 6:44, Reply)
I did say that

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 6:45, Reply)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt they call him The Handbag, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 6:45, Reply)

Old English roots: The word comes from the Old English word beallucas, which means "testicles".
Proto-Germanic origin: This word is derived from the Proto-Germanic *ball-, which itself comes from the Proto-Indo-European root *bhel- meaning "to blow, swell".
Neutral term: For a long time, "bollocks" (or "ballocks") was a neutral term for testicles. There is no evidence to suggest it was originally a vulgar word.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 9:43, Reply)
alright queef's grandad

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 9:47, Reply)

*shakes stick angrily.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 11:07, Reply)
bhel puri
bellows
It's from Sanskrit:
भेल / भेला (bhela) — meaning to swell, to puff, to expand
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 13:01, Reply)
are you calling my pint a bhel puri?

(Jingles McFuck ho bastard ho 🎅🎄🎁, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 15:34, Reply)
I've never understood what calling someone's pint a poof is supposed to mean.
Could you explain it to me?
(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 11 Dec 2025, 16:53, Reply)
bhela bhela bhela, tell me more, tell me more

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 17:10, Reply)
Morning

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 6:45, Reply)
bollocks?

(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 8:34, Reply)
No sae hard Larry!

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 11 Dec 2025, 7:23, Reply)
Suck my balls

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 7:25, Reply)
bollocks!

(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 8:34, Reply)
Morning

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 8:23, Reply)
bollocksning

(I helped save b3ta! Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 8:40, Reply)
alright

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 8:50, Reply)
Tang

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 9:26, Reply)
Clan

(I helped save b3ta! Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 9:27, Reply)
what about these trains eh TH you couldn't make it up

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 9:31, Reply)
I likes saying Bogies lol

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 10:11, Reply)
Can't believe the Fifa Peace Prize winner
has started a war already. The award means nothing to me now.
(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 9:04, Reply)
He must have been tricked into it
It's the only explanation
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 9:26, Reply)
Show some more respect please

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 9:32, Reply)

Yes, it's a Fifa foe scrum...
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 11:21, Reply)
FIFA is now Firing Into Former Allies

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti., Thu 11 Dec 2025, 14:07, Reply)
Can we just wait and see who gets it next year before we rush to judgement? Also, what is war exactly, if not a noisy kind of peace?
War, what is it good for? Arms sales and property development opportunities, for a start.
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 14:09, Reply)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! Sn0tters 🇯🇴🇧🇧🇮🇪, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 9:17, Reply)
Leg it, someone's shat in the kettle!

(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 9:44, Reply)
That was me m8

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 11 Dec 2025, 11:21, Reply)

Alright Smegolas.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 11:22, Reply)
Pompidou?

(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 14:10, Reply)
Just ate 16 meatballs and I don't give a shit
LOL balls
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Wed 10 Dec 2025, 21:37, Reply)
You will tomorrow morning, and HOW.

(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 10 Dec 2025, 21:47, Reply)
Gas yourself.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 10 Dec 2025, 22:11, Reply)
were they swedish? not at all, they were savory.

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 22:56, Reply)
-do
+ca
(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Thu 11 Dec 2025, 6:42, Reply)
early evening

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 10 Dec 2025, 17:27, Reply)
uh-huh

(I helped save b3ta! Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 18:12, Reply)
when do we call it late evening?
- or night, even?
(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 21:28, Reply)
I’m not an expert
but I think it’s night now.
(I helped save b3ta! Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 23:30, Reply)
correct

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 23:40, Reply)
HIYA!

(dampdirtynonce The Real Spanishfly, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 21:02, Reply)
Piss off spanishfly

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 10 Dec 2025, 21:12, Reply)
Alright best mate

(dampdirtynonce The Real Spanishfly, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 21:15, Reply)
AFTERNOON!

(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 12:45, Reply)
Is it tho

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 10 Dec 2025, 13:20, Reply)
It bloody well is right here
- and that's all that matters
(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 13:24, Reply)
afternoon is like a contagious rash that creeps across the planet, congratulations on your recent infection

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 13:28, Reply)
Was this really worthy of caps lock and an exclamation mark?

(I helped save b3ta! Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 13:30, Reply)
yes. it's a warning
alt: YES!
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 13:36, Reply)
SHIT!

(I helped save b3ta! Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 13:39, Reply)
RIGHT?!

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 14:08, Reply)
NO WAI !!!!!

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 14:26, Reply)
sorry, i always shout when i climax

(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 14:31, Reply)
-shout when i climax +overshare

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 15:34, Reply)
Beaker

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 15:50, Reply)
I'll cap your slock in a minute, Sonny Jim.

(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 10 Dec 2025, 18:10, Reply)
YES!!!!!!!!!!!
TAKE THAT LIBS!!!!
(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 14:26, Reply)
morning

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 10 Dec 2025, 6:32, Reply)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 7:06, Reply)
Hi

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 10 Dec 2025, 7:39, Reply)
almost there...

(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 11:58, Reply)
oh god yes!
b3ta.com/talk/8463788
(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 12:46, Reply)
Morning.

(I helped save b3ta! Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 7:36, Reply)
alright

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 10 Dec 2025, 7:40, Reply)
Yes

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 8:25, Reply)
Hi. Humpday...

(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 8:31, Reply)
disgusting

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 11:12, Reply)
Morning
Still no sign of a polar vortex.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 9:06, Reply)
Alright ocsp you weirdo

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 10 Dec 2025, 9:50, Reply)

Alright Smegosaurus.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 11:38, Reply)
Don't wait for the polar vortex to come to you. Seize the day, get out there and make your own polar vortex!

(I helped save b3ta! Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 10:11, Reply)

Carpe Wintryem.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 11:34, Reply)
Are you looking in the right place?

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 10:14, Reply)
The internet
keeps sending me messages about some kind of wintry armageddon but it never appears. There was rain, but no yetis. Very underwhelming.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 11:31, Reply)
Prepare to be whelmed.

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti., Wed 10 Dec 2025, 11:44, Reply)
So thoroughly whelmed
I immediately belmed.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Wed 10 Dec 2025, 12:18, Reply)
^ Nightmare on Belm Street

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti., Wed 10 Dec 2025, 15:50, Reply)
Alright everyone.
There's a rat in my attic, what amma gonna doo?
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 16:23, Reply)
Alright ocsp you weirdo

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Tue 9 Dec 2025, 16:30, Reply)

Alright Doz.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 16:44, Reply)
well, you've got a few options

(Jingles McFuck ho bastard ho 🎅🎄🎁, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 16:34, Reply)

I'm not allowed to kill it, and the thing that's supposed to make a noise to piss it off is fucking useless.

Actually, saying that, I don't really want to kill it, I just want it to stop shitting in the insulation.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 16:46, Reply)
humane trap then

(Jingles McFuck ho bastard ho 🎅🎄🎁, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 17:19, Reply)
Can you not read? It’s a rat not a humane.

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 17:35, Reply)
that was me m8

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 17:37, Reply)
fix dat rat

(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt they call him The Handbag, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 18:07, Reply)
Give it a colostomy

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 19:51, Reply)
Triggered

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 20:42, Reply)
I liked the way you worked it, no diggety
You had to bag it up

No offence love
(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 21:50, Reply)
❤️

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 22:11, Reply)
I once had a shit while walking around B&Q
Which I consider a win
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 22:53, Reply)
>I'm not allowed to kill it
you are going to have sooo many rats
(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt they call him The Handbag, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 23:15, Reply)
Shit yourself inside out

(I helped save b3ta! Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 16:34, Reply)

How will that help?
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 16:45, Reply)
it'll certainly make the rat issue less pressing

(Jingles McFuck ho bastard ho 🎅🎄🎁, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 17:20, Reply)
I’m not sure that it will. I just have a hunch.

(I helped save b3ta! Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 17:42, Reply)
I think you're onto something here m8

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 19:04, Reply)
REMzzz

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 17:15, Reply)
gaz mongychops, he knows about that sort of thing

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 16:35, Reply)

Standard.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 16:48, Reply)
Borrow a cat, lock it in your attic for 3 days.
Cheers.
(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Tue 9 Dec 2025, 16:53, Reply)

I've got 3 cats but they're all fat pussies.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 16:58, Reply)
That's why you need to borrow one and starve it.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Tue 9 Dec 2025, 17:30, Reply)
call ICE

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 17:16, Reply)
Pump it full of cum

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 17:19, Reply)
yes!

(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt they call him The Handbag, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 19:37, Reply)
Finally, a sensible solution

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 20:42, Reply)
sadly not the cure-all I'd hoped for, it was no good at all on the wasps' nest i tried it on

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 21:47, Reply)
This you?
share.google/mq5AtFZlMJR6lpuXe
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 23:07, Reply)

in my attic, what amma gonna doo? up my bunghole, ARMAGEDDON
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 17:36, Reply)
BERNARD MANNING

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Tue 9 Dec 2025, 17:43, Reply)
Tempt it down with some red, red wine.

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti., Tue 9 Dec 2025, 18:20, Reply)
Tickle it's soft vulnerable underbelly
Then eat it
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Tue 9 Dec 2025, 23:10, Reply)
afternoon

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 12:10, Reply)
alright

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Tue 9 Dec 2025, 12:26, Reply)
You would say that

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 12:33, Reply)
Bollocks

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 12:33, Reply)
you would say that

(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt they call him The Handbag, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 13:51, Reply)
I did say that

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 15:18, Reply)
You would say that

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 12:34, Reply)
You keep your bread in the fridge.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Tue 9 Dec 2025, 12:51, Reply)
doo dah doo dah

(Jingles McFuck ho bastard ho 🎅🎄🎁, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 14:06, Reply)
You buy brown bread in a can. You buy a 12-pack.
bumbeans
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 16:32, Reply)
Bollocks

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 15:18, Reply)
Alright

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 12:34, Reply)
Bollocks

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 12:49, Reply)
You would say that

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Tue 9 Dec 2025, 12:51, Reply)
he did say that

(Jingles McFuck ho bastard ho 🎅🎄🎁, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 14:52, Reply)
Alright

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 15:19, Reply)
alright

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 12:57, Reply)
already
bummer
(I helped save b3ta! theniwokeup has been awake since, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 13:15, Reply)
Be dark soon

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 15:02, Reply)
it was -10c here this morning :(

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 15:18, Reply)
Bollocks

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 15:19, Reply)
retracted :(

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 16:21, Reply)
I bet you don't like reggae either

(Jingles McFuck ho bastard ho 🎅🎄🎁, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 15:46, Reply)
frowny face :(

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 16:38, Reply)
I'm well up for it

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 15:49, Reply)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 6:20, Reply)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt they call him The Handbag, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 6:24, Reply)
Bollocks

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 9:50, Reply)
You would say that

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 9:50, Reply)
Morning

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 9:50, Reply)
Bollocks

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 9:51, Reply)
alright

(Jingles McFuck ho bastard ho 🎅🎄🎁, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 10:52, Reply)
You would say that

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 9:51, Reply)
morning

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Tue 9 Dec 2025, 6:36, Reply)
Bollocks

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 10:06, Reply)
You would say that

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 10:06, Reply)
Morning

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 10:06, Reply)
You would say that

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 10:07, Reply)
alright

(Jingles McFuck ho bastard ho 🎅🎄🎁, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 10:53, Reply)
Bollocks

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 10:07, Reply)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 6:42, Reply)
Bollocks

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 10:30, Reply)
You would say that

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 10:30, Reply)
Morning

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 10:30, Reply)
You would say that

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 10:31, Reply)
Bollocks

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 10:31, Reply)
alright

(Jingles McFuck ho bastard ho 🎅🎄🎁, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 10:53, Reply)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 7:19, Reply)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 7:47, Reply)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 8:16, Reply)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 8:44, Reply)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 8:48, Reply)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 8:50, Reply)
morning

(Jingles McFuck ho bastard ho 🎅🎄🎁, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 9:19, Reply)
GEOSTORM

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 11:21, Reply)
alright

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Tue 9 Dec 2025, 11:50, Reply)
Steam me the Bum of Alfredo Garcia!
*Radio 4 audience laughs, Jack Dee groans*

Well, that was tedious. Now what?
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 15:47, Reply)
Uh
Now we kiss?
(I helped save b3ta! Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 15:47, Reply)
Dunno if this calls for a "put on my wizard robe and hat" reference
or "polka dot knickers"
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 15:53, Reply)
Then I don't know whether to laugh politely or vomit impolitely.

(I helped save b3ta! Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 16:23, Reply)
I think there's time for both

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 16:34, Reply)
PODKA

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Mon 8 Dec 2025, 17:05, Reply)
BRACE YOURSELF

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 17:36, Reply)
CHECKS CONTENTS

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 18:57, Reply)
...of grry's hard drive

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Mon 8 Dec 2025, 19:13, Reply)
had that seized years ago m8

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 21:35, Reply)
get out of my closet!

(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 18:39, Reply)
Alright

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 16:11, Reply)
alright [ insert comedic twist on your name here ]

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 16:35, Reply)
Two GAY Hats
lol
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 19:15, Reply)
Oh COME ON

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 20:13, Reply)
+ MY FACE YOU BIG SEXY GAY MAN

(I helped save b3ta! Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 9 Dec 2025, 8:51, Reply)
Alright

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 18:06, Reply)
yer you?

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 21:34, Reply)
Some cunt up the road chopped through their underground electric cable
Now we're all suffering in darkness and cold while they try to fix it
(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 18:41, Reply)
that was me m8

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 18:46, Reply)
fucker

(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 19:02, Reply)
Update
First broke the cable at 2 pm.
Might be fixed by 10 pm.

Bollock
(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 20:14, Reply)
I've read better haikus, I'll be honest.

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti., Mon 8 Dec 2025, 20:45, Reply)
That seems very quick to me. Dno normally take hours just to attend. Then dig out...blah blah

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 20:59, Reply)
Remember when we got telly and teletext through the air,
can't cut through that with a spade, and people say the future is better
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 23:12, Reply)
gutted
now you're gonna miss Eastenders AND Corrie
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 21:35, Reply)
Isn't that just life?

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 23:08, Reply)
GS

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 18:57, Reply)
I LITERALLY do NOT EVEN know how to respond to this

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 21:35, Reply)
afternoon

(Jingles McFuck ho bastard ho 🎅🎄🎁, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 12:27, Reply)
Hold on, I've not finished my morning yet

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 13:00, Reply)
Right, finished now. Carry on

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 13:15, Reply)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 13:52, Reply)
WRONG

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 15:09, Reply)
It's getting dark outside now, I'm calling evening.

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 15:10, Reply)
And seeing as it's now dark I assume that it is also gayshift as this gets moved earlier in winter due to gaylight saving time.

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 15:16, Reply)
Confirmed, Flaming Freddie the Camp Lamplighter just minced past my window, igniting the lampposts with his magical rainbow

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 15:38, Reply)
settle the fuck down gary numan

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 17:08, Reply)
morning

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Mon 8 Dec 2025, 3:41, Reply)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt they call him The Handbag, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 5:09, Reply)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 6:19, Reply)
Mornday moning

(I helped save b3ta! Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 7:37, Reply)
m
o
r
n
I
n
g
(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 7:53, Reply)
check out
e e
cum
mings
,
here

!
(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 8:52, Reply)
lol
ming
(I helped save b3ta! Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 9:00, Reply)
Morning

(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 8:29, Reply)
yes

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 10:26, Reply)
Just left my 'friend's' house
We were discussing music and the conversation went thusly

You know Elton John didn't write any of his songs

Duh, yeah everyone knows Reg Dwight wrote the lyrics

*we are no longer friends
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Sun 7 Dec 2025, 19:38, Reply)
Reg Dweft

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 20:18, Reply)
Saturday Night’s Alright for Dying

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 20:29, Reply)
The Bitch Is Dead

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 21:12, Reply)
Bernie Torpid

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 20:47, Reply)
I won't be going to my friend's house anymore
The surgery wasn't the success we thought it was. They've pulled the plug and given him the last rites. According to his husband, he's got a couple of hours at best. I am now getting very drunk.
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 20:52, Reply)
Oh fucking hell, sorry to hear that, Smashy.
My sincerest condolences.
(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sun 7 Dec 2025, 21:11, Reply)
Thanks
I'm not thinking well right now
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 21:21, Reply)
sorry smashy
have an internet hug
(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt they call him The Handbag, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 21:48, Reply)
Thanks
His husband just called, he's gone. I'm turning my phone off now.
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 21:59, Reply)
fuck. :(

(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt they call him The Handbag, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 22:12, Reply)
Rip Dwight

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 21:00, Reply)
I'm Not Standing

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 21:11, Reply)
Cops had cordoned off the court across from ours when we got back from Asbury Park, I just found out there was a murder there earlier

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 22:06, Reply)
are you a judge?

(Jingles McFuck ho bastard ho 🎅🎄🎁, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 5:55, Reply)
No Jingles, I'm a murderer

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 18:39, Reply)
The Culled

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 6:15, Reply)
Why did the baker have brown hands?
Because he kneaded a poo!!!!

Not really, he was Somalian
(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 13:47, Reply)
President Trump says Somalians are garbage, he's not a racist so i guess it's just the truth

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 14:00, Reply)
- brown
+ smelly

Removes any troublesome hint of Reform or EDL leanings.
(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 15:32, Reply)
You're saying that all Somalians are smelly, that's what you're saying

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 15:45, Reply)
He's got a point m8
Don't shoot the messenger and when I mean messenger I of course mean international aid worker in war-torn Mogadishu
(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 16:29, Reply)
Gezondheid

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 17:24, Reply)
Martin sub-Parr

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 16:02, Reply)
The Boo Deadlies

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 17:39, Reply)

amzn.eu/d/buvSA10
(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 16:20, Reply)
A tale as old as time

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 16:26, Reply)

"perfectly safe for the kids, but with a few snickers that adults with a slightly bent sense of humour can enjoy while reading along"

Oh, I see what 'Munty' was going for now, it was far too subtle without that clue
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 19:06, Reply)
Munt and the gang

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 21:01, Reply)
Did you hear the one about the constipated mathematician?
It was due mainly to poor diet, and being improperly hydrated
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 19:37, Reply)
Probably goes hand in hand with the autistic spectrum disorder that so often accompanies mathematical genius.

(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sun 7 Dec 2025, 20:22, Reply)
and a pencil up the pooper

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 21:02, Reply)
Turtle power!

(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sun 7 Dec 2025, 21:13, Reply)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 7:30, Reply)
bore da pawb!

(Jingles McFuck ho bastard ho 🎅🎄🎁, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 9:37, Reply)
Goedemorgen

(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 9:41, Reply)
madainn mhath!

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 10:21, Reply)
exercise, breakfast+lunch, Caravaggio at the Wallace Collection, roast, guffs, bed
not that anyone arksed
(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 10:41, Reply)
lol vag

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 10:46, Reply)
ah yes
full-lipped, languorous boys who seem to solicit the onlooker with their offers of fruit, wine, flowers—and themselves
(Jingles McFuck ho bastard ho 🎅🎄🎁, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 11:15, Reply)
Fuck yeah

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 11:18, Reply)
I peel mine first

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 11:30, Reply)

www.wikihow.com/Eat-Langoustines
(Jingles McFuck ho bastard ho 🎅🎄🎁, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 11:52, Reply)
MMMMNEURRGH I AM A GAY RENAISSANCE PAINTER AND I LOVE IT UP MY BUM-BUM FROM OTHER GAY RENAISSANCE PAINTERS

(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sun 7 Dec 2025, 15:18, Reply)
I know

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 11:11, Reply)
alright De La Soul

(Jingles McFuck ho bastard ho 🎅🎄🎁, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 11:16, Reply)
acceptable Dream Warriors

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 13:01, Reply)
Wash Your Bell in My Sink

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 13:33, Reply)
Push Your Face in My Stink

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 13:41, Reply)

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