I kissed a girl and I got #metooed

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 20:34, archived)

^nonce

(piss and shit, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 20:54, archived)

^stickleprick

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 21:08, archived)

The taste of her sweaty ballsack?

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 21:30, archived)

+ "...the new fragrance from Calvin Klein."
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 25 Aug 2023, 21:42, archived)

The taste of her furry cheesedick

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 21:45, archived)

PAEDO

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 22:39, archived)

I almost feel sorry for your pitiful life.

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 22:59, archived)

I feel sorry for your kid.

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 23:09, archived)

I wouldn’t he’s fucking great.
You still “tucking” yours in at night?
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Sat 26 Aug 2023, 9:06, archived)

alright Andrew Tait without any of the influence or money

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 22:54, archived)

And probably even less chin.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sat 26 Aug 2023, 8:51, archived)

Pushing that best ever /chat thread down the board
hi guy's
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 14:35, archived)

Hello

( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 14:37, archived)

I am doing extra work next week to help out as someone has quit out of the blue, and I'm not happy about it
still I'm off out for a massive night out tomorrow for the first time in yonks so it's not all bad news
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 14:48, archived)

I'm back to normal work hours now
Can't wait to get in today to see what I'm going to be blamed for
( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 15:05, archived)

Do a poo on the floor
That'll show them
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 16:02, archived)

Someone else has already done that

( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 16:19, archived)

that was me m8

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 16:53, archived)

The supervisor actually praised us
And said we'd done a great job. Quite possibly because t2 was a shithole and hasn't been hoovered in a week
( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 20:07, archived)

hoovered the vista, baby

(piss and shit, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 20:55, archived)

Have a wank over the pasta
That'll show them
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 16:01, archived)

Ah, a fellow pastabation fan.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 25 Aug 2023, 16:14, archived)

heh

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 16:53, archived)

Classic!

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 15:32, archived)

ikr

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 15:58, archived)

Smeg smeggy smeg smeg

(Runcorn shitty limits, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 15:40, archived)

textbook Smeg

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 15:58, archived)

You're really growing into the role, I wonder how far you can take it?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 16:44, archived)

Smeg smegging smeggy smegging smeg

(Runcorn shitty limits, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 17:00, archived)

Wow!

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 17:13, archived)

came here for the semen khaidenko, stayed for the smegging smeggy smeg

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 17:31, archived)

Smeg peg
Lol pegging
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 17:50, archived)

lastnames.myheritage.com/last-name/smeg
( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 18:30, archived)

Might anally penetrate a Canadian.

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 19:47, archived)

anally eh?nally
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 25 Aug 2023, 19:50, archived)

They'll apologize.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 20:20, archived)

Hey now, you're a smeg head
get your ghey on, go fuck yourself
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 10:58, archived)

xnay on your otay or whatever

( Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 11:09, archived)

arseboon dilbaro

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 11:09, archived)

How about you stick your head in a chip pan?

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 11:12, archived)

gunt off

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 11:13, archived)

just ordered the 45 of this from Spain
www.youtube.com/watch?v=vjSStHeWlvE&ab_channel=tiefendrifter
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 11:18, archived)

It comes with clowns

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 11:20, archived)

Staring at you

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 11:20, archived)

ASSCLOWN

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 11:44, archived)

Midget clowns are cool

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 11:53, archived)

_{all the other tables}
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 12:09, archived)

Dwarf clown throwing is to become an Olympic sport
A guy in the pub told me
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 12:24, archived)

^ tosser

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 14:21, archived)

, go away

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 15:08, archived)

Today should be a day of celebration
That colossal tangerine spunkflute actually got arrested
( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 11:29, archived)

They finally nabbed Queef?
On what charges?
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 11:52, archived)

Being a nullo

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 12:28, archived)

Crimes against food poncery

( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 12:35, archived)

I'm going here the night before my 50th
www.greatitalianchefs.com/restaurants/pepe-in-grani
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 13:04, archived)

Looks good
My 50th next year, no idea what I'm doing yet, apart from going on holiday
( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 13:08, archived)

They haven't a Dominos?
Fucking heathens
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 13:11, archived)

Fuck me you lot are fucking old.

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 14:22, archived)

Nude beatboxing in a built up area

( broadsword, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 12:54, archived)

I hear it was lying on his cv. This is him in his previous jobbie
www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3097640/The-Luft-wafer-Ice-cream-cone-named-Adolf-Hitler-sale-India-sparks-anger-Germany.html
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 12:58, archived)

morning

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 9:08, archived)

Fuck you, Livecunt. Fuck you.

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 10:11, archived)

I think Mr H has said enough.

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 10:30, archived)

Piss off.

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 10:34, archived)

Get fucked.

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 10:38, archived)

^ wanker

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 10:47, archived)

ARSEHOLE

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 10:43, archived)

b3ta the musical
So Wow That's A Neato What Now Right (to the tune of Don't Cry For Me Argentina)
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 17:49, archived)

Sounds sexual
count me in
( $$ ✅, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 17:50, archived)

Settle the fuck down Sigmund and take that thick dark veinous tube out of your mouth ffs

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 17:53, archived)

Hey, sometimes a big black cock is just a big black cock.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 24 Aug 2023, 18:09, archived)

^cigar envy

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 18:10, archived)

Good pipe weather!
Thought I'd fire up the briar!
( $$ ✅, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 18:10, archived)

If you start licking the mouthpiece you're out of this thread ok

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 18:11, archived)

Needy Spastic to the tune of Hallelujah Chorus, an old fave

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 18:02, archived)

You've mentioned this before, but it's no less true for all that.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 24 Aug 2023, 18:17, archived)

It just fits so well, sometimes I'm not sure which is the official lyric

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 19:56, archived)

Look I can see there's no enthusiasm for this but I actually have significant financial backing
All You Base (Are Belong To Us) -- The First Time (Ever I Saw Your Face)
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 18:03, archived)

Charged off my tits to the tune of Jizzed In My Pants

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 18:12, archived)

significant financial backing!

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 18:28, archived)

intermission music by orchestral manoeuvres in the dark with a vacuum cleaner

( MiseryCunt sometimes the squirrel catches the dog, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 18:41, archived)

b3ta.com/links/Alligator_Shitfuck_All_Night_Long
( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 18:47, archived)

That's the main theme sorted
Interspersed with Up Yer Bum
( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 19:10, archived)

from 2015:
www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/cj2wm2pad7l14lu4trek9/brb_-_nostalgia_for_prickbot.mp3?rlkey=h4xc0kc7ermgj2aczlhlsvmoz&dl=0
( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 20:01, archived)

Agadoo doo doo push some billy down your jap agadoo doo doo and then wank it all back up

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 19:04, archived)

This would make a great single, could even have some 'rap' in it for 'the kids'
Billy's great if you know what I mean
Try some methamphetamine
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 19:54, archived)

I like to stick it
up my jap
come on kids
do the billy jap rap!

Could be another number one for that will i smith.
( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 22:33, archived)

feat. 2CC Cru

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 23:08, archived)

I laughed WAAAAAY too much at this

( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 21:05, archived)

Billy jap is not my lover

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Fri 25 Aug 2023, 6:44, archived)

I'm in

( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 21:04, archived)

They cheap cosmetic surgery you know xxxx thread

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 14:51, archived)

They cheap cosmetic surgery you know xxxx

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 14:51, archived)

They cheap cosmetic surgery you know xxxx
you know?
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 16:35, archived)

Catwring, cycling ave. etc

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 14:52, archived)

Nice to see the kind of attention to detail one might hope to see in one's doctor eh
Grams, milligrams, pretty much the same thing really, what could go wrong
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 14:57, archived)

No wonder his shit pub went bust and he declared himself bankrupt

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 15:27, archived)

'when someone orders a double you give them two bottles of spirits, right?'

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 15:41, archived)

...and then you burn it down for the insurance money

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 15:45, archived)

before realising you weren't actually insured

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 15:57, archived)

And your wife & kids were locked inside.

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 16:12, archived)

They cheap insurance you know xxx

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 16:37, archived)

rn m
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 24 Aug 2023, 16:53, archived)

Shipman taught me all I know

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 16:20, archived)

oh man, I'm so 'Gen Zee'
I'm 'binge watching' the 'box set' of SAS Rogue Heroes, might have an avocado or something. It's not bad, as it goes, decent AC/DC-heavy soundtrack and some other 70s rock. I give it 4 Queefs
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 14:56, archived)

"Queeves", surely?

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 24 Aug 2023, 15:17, archived)

heh, you're dead right

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 15:30, archived)

If a dog barks twice is that two woofs or two wooves?
Really makes you think.
(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 15:31, archived)

w p

haha, tpice, tpo, monsterzzzzz
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 15:39, archived)

meaty woove shits

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 16:38, archived)

+ "I'm John Peel, and that was a choice cut from the new EP by"

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 24 Aug 2023, 16:54, archived)

Sammy Head​-​Splitter and the Shit​-​Spitters
"Roscoe had a gunshot wound to his head but there was no gun. Sammy had a gun but it was a .22 with pink glitter on it. Roscoe was shot with a 44. The windows were up and no bullet holes. That means 2 Sammy's. I miss those idiots. Sammy took a shit in my microwave once."
(I once heard John Peel mention The Shit-Spitters on his show, followed by "... and now this is 'Fax Me, I'm A Prick'")
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 17:31, archived)

Alright shagger!

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 15:36, archived)

haha, not three bad!
that's what I say instead of too, geddit???
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 15:40, archived)

Is this one of those widely recycled internet in-jokes, or "me-mes", that the young 'uns are so into these days?

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 24 Aug 2023, 15:44, archived)

It's the latest AMAZEBALLS thing from 'dr best troll' aka presidentputin

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 15:49, archived)

it's pronounced 'mehmey' m8
you know, like 'Mahmoud'
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 15:55, archived)

no-one likes Mahmoud m8

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 15:56, archived)

WEEOO, WEEOO

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 15:56, archived)

Alright Salman Rushdie

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 16:13, archived)

"Meh-mey"?
"Meh ghey", moar liek!!!!!1111oneeleven
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 24 Aug 2023, 16:55, archived)

Living the Gen Zee life
right here, right now
( $$ ✅, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 17:07, archived)

alright

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 12:25, archived)

Fuck you, Livecunt. Fuck you.

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 12:26, archived)

alright livecunt

( broadsword, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 12:58, archived)

Hi bestie
They cheap cosmetic surgery you know xxxx
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 13:03, archived)

They cheap cosmetic surgery you know xxxx

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 13:18, archived)

Why did Elizabeth Arden?
Because Max Factor
Lol Max
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 13:20, archived)

“You can’t let nobody see you sweat,” one dancer says as her colleagues nod and wipe tears from their eyes. “You have to be three times better than. It’s not two times. It’s three times. You know what I mean?”

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 13:19, archived)

mornimg

( MiseryCunt sometimes the squirrel catches the dog, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 6:34, archived)

Day off today so piss in a jam jar rather than get out of bed
Oh and child care too :(
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 7:18, archived)

child care in a jam jar?
or piss in a child care?
(piss and shit, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 9:15, archived)

Get out of child care

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 9:34, archived)

Do not pass jam jar
Do not collect 200 kids
( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 9:55, archived)

3 are enough

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 10:17, archived)

Bake me a cake containing a file please

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 10:16, archived)

Silly person

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 10:15, archived)

or piss in a child care?

Turtle Power :*(
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 10:25, archived)

:((

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 13:17, archived)

You've been eating jam in bed?
You gonna shit in a pringles tube too?
( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 13:00, archived)

A sock

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 13:02, archived)

Once you pop, etc

( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 13:08, archived)

+o

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 24 Aug 2023, 15:45, archived)

morning.

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 7:53, archived)

Fuck you, Livecunt. Fuck you.

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 9:34, archived)

Piss off

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 10:18, archived)

Shoot his plane down!
in two months
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 11:55, archived)

Morning

( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Thu 24 Aug 2023, 8:03, archived)

RIP Yevgeny Prigozhin
Foevah wiv da angels. Too good fo dis world babes
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 19:41, archived)

Apparently the enemy of my enemy was also my enemy, really makes you think

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 19:42, archived)

I don't want to think and you can't make me.

( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 19:52, archived)

Bit deep for me comrade Purgatory

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 20:14, archived)

Do you look like David Frum though?

( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 19:52, archived)

I liked it when Louis Walsh kept pronouncing his name wrong.
"It's Wagner, not Wagner!"
( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 20:04, archived)

Wagn smegm
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 21:55, archived)

Treacherous dog
Hand on heart nowt to do with me comrades
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 20:13, archived)

hmm

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 21:03, archived)

alright

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 20:26, archived)

S M E G

(Runcorn shitty limits, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 20:44, archived)

textbook Smeg

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 21:56, archived)

in my life I will have a SMEG fridge, just because of the smeg

( Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 23:32, archived)

smegging smeggy smeg thread
hullo

just submitted my tax return, looks like I'm due a hefty rebate, fucking wooyay and pfft
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 15:47, archived)

smegging smeggy smeg and stick milk on it
/ac
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 15:47, archived)

Maybe treat yourself to some smaller teatowels for your flat.
Teaflannels, preferably.
(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 15:54, archived)

I'll replace them with teabags

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 15:57, archived)

Round ones?

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 16:26, archived)

pyramids m8

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 16:30, archived)

Tea fail
Yorkshire or GTFO
(Jason Voorhees 🔪, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 18:13, archived)

Smeg this
*points at anal fistula*
( $$ ✅, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 16:45, archived)

*slurps*

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 16:50, archived)

tax lax
turn ctum
reb prost
, -
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 23 Aug 2023, 16:50, archived)

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 16:50, archived)

Come on, that was GOLD.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 23 Aug 2023, 16:58, archived)

my accountant does mine

( MiseryCunt sometimes the squirrel catches the dog, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 17:16, archived)

Alright emvee

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 17:38, archived)

#dividends

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 17:45, archived)

haha i nearly put that in myself
( MiseryCunt sometimes the squirrel catches the dog, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 19:49, archived)

Is this an official smeg thread?

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 18:05, archived)

It is now.
Smeg.
(Runcorn shitty limits, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 18:34, archived)

You smeghead Rimmer

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 19:20, archived)

Smeg off u smegger

(Runcorn shitty limits, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 18:34, archived)

Yevgeny PriGHOSTzhin, more like!!

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 18:58, archived)

The fact that anyone didn’t think he would be dead within months is beyond me.

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 19:08, archived)

Yeah, after the mutiny you just couldn't move for people saying "well he's going to live forever now", eh

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 19:12, archived)

Those were my exact words!!

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 19:25, archived)

Smeg

(Runcorn shitty limits, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 19:33, archived)

Prighozhout

( $$ ✅, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 19:19, archived)

YevGONEy

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 19:26, archived)

Lunchtime thread

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 12:24, archived)

It's not very good tbh
Like your face
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 12:39, archived)

Catwring

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 13:13, archived)

I have just seen my dads car on my lunchtime walk.
Bit odd he died 2 years ago.
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 13:04, archived)

Ghost car

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 13:09, archived)

Christine…funnily enough that was my dads name.

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 13:13, archived)

Your dad was called Christine?
Explains the tranny kid.
(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 13:14, archived)

Strawberry girl

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 13:17, archived)

apparently they made a sequel to Coming To America a couple of years ago
must have been a bit desperate for cash
(piss and shit, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 13:30, archived)

Cool, thanks

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 13:37, archived)

it was called 'Coming 2 America'

(piss and shit, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 14:32, archived)

Midori was in the first one, one of the birds with her tits out in the pool, FACT

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 14:45, archived)

The only thing I remember about it is "the royal penis is clean" and the Duke brothers

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 15:09, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8382015
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 15:09, archived)

b3ta, you mean

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 15:29, archived)

a melon liquer had its tits out?
I don't remember that
(piss and shit, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 15:43, archived)

If by 'melon liquer' you mean 'big titted black adult actress', then yes.

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 15:45, archived)

urgh
www.google.com/search?client=firefox-b-m&sca_esv=559361602&biw=372&bih=698&tbm=isch&sa=1&q=midori+singer&oq=midori+singer&aqs=mobile-gws-lite..0l5#imgrc=UXxuzURIK8hRMM
(piss and shit, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 16:03, archived)

^ gay

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 16:17, archived)

Might switch my commercial property investments into global equities
They're dragging overall performance down THE FUCKING CUNTS.
(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 15:44, archived)

cool, I enjoyed reading this, and I hope you succeed in everything you do

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 16:21, archived)

Thanks mate.

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 16:24, archived)

Could it be any more obvious that I'm not well? Have you ever seen me say anything like this before? Your thanks are very unkind and hurtful in that context.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 16:52, archived)

Look I'm just going to be honest, I've been having these... positive thoughts lately :(

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 16:53, archived)

Maybe /chat is the wrong place for you

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 17:39, archived)

I hope your hospice catches fire

( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 17:56, archived)

I hope your children go blind.

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 18:09, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8382029
(Jason Voorhees 🔪, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 18:17, archived)

Morning
Are we still discussing wolf shit or a new and exciting level of wackiness?
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 7:31, archived)

w c
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 23 Aug 2023, 7:40, archived)

Colf shit?

( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 7:41, archived)

is like cog shit

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 16:25, archived)

Morning

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 9:12, archived)

nec and exciting?
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 9:32, archived)

Alright monster munch, nice to have you back

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 10:35, archived)

Deliberately misunderstood strikey-G's are the lowest form of humour.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 23 Aug 2023, 10:50, archived)

Er, someone's forgetting about Dave Trouser threads

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 11:18, archived)

What looks like the bottom of the barrel may in fact just be a buildup of unpleasant sediment.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 16:23, archived)

No wolf shit
But the cat must have trodden in one of its own turds last night, because I woke up to find streaks of it across the kitchen floor where he was trying to get it off
( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 7:41, archived)

Funny how everything else is you sleepwalking, but shit smeared everywhere must have been the cat

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 8:13, archived)

Yes, the paw prints were a giveaway

( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 8:45, archived)

Wolves

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 9:10, archived)

You?

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 9:13, archived)

That was me mate

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 9:12, archived)

No dreamies for you

( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 10:02, archived)

:(
I am a fresh fish sort of moggy anyway
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 11:55, archived)

morning

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 8:12, archived)

Alrite

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 9:14, archived)

Fuck you, Livecunt. Fuck you.

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 9:49, archived)

Alright.
Wolves weren’t shit against Man U the other week. They were the better team.
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 11:49, archived)

Wolverhampton is a sort of upmarket Runcorn

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 11:56, archived)

There is nothing like Runcorn mate. Nothing.
Maybe Widnes.
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 12:03, archived)

Unless we are talking about Warrington Wolves. That place is a shit hole.
Their first ground called Wilderspool stadium was the first away game I went to watch Widnes Vs Warrington.

There was a huge fight and I was thrown over the snack bar by my dad. Great days.
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 12:12, archived)

WE LOVE YOU MICHAEL

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 12:17, archived)

Thanks mate.

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 12:24, archived)

My giraffe has no spots
How does it know what species it is?
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 19:19, archived)

Because it sires viable young with other giraffes?

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 19:27, archived)

Possibly
If only there was a vet here
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 19:34, archived)

Chance would be a fine thing, a fine thing indeed!

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 19:58, archived)

What delightfully wacky role-play.

( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 20:01, archived)

It's no 'alexei sayle putting his bins out', I'll give you that.

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 21:03, archived)

It's no Red Dwarf either

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 22:23, archived)

sʇᴉɥs ⅎʅoʍ ʎʇɐǝɯ ⬅️

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 22:50, archived)

┏━┳┓╋╋╋╋╋╋╋╋╋╋┏┓
┃┏┫┗┳━┓┏┳┳━┳━┳┛┃
┃┗┫┃┃╋┗┫┏┫╋┃┻┫╋┃
┗━┻┻┻━━┻┛┣┓┣━┻━┛
╋╋╋╋╋╋╋╋╋┗━┛
┏━┳━┳━┓
┃┃┃━┫━┫
┃┃┃┏┫┏┛
┗━┻┛┗┛
┏━┳━┓
┃┃┃┃┣┳┓
┃┃┃┃┃┃┃
┗┻━┻╋┓┃
╋╋╋╋┗━┛
┏━━┳┳┓┏━┓
┗┓┏╋┫┗┫━┫
╋┃┃┃┃┏╋━┃
╋┗┛┗┻━┻━┛
( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 23:05, archived)

Tits lol
Meaty wolf shitty titties
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 23:11, archived)

___________§§§$$§§$§§_
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( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 23:15, archived)

The blue tongue would be a clue
So would being born with horns, they're the only animals that are.
( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 20:20, archived)

Never knew that
About the horns
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 20:46, archived)

Have you heard about the meaty wolf shits?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 22:55, archived)

w͖͜o̡͎l̢̙̠v̪̞̺e͙͇͜s̠̦ a̝̠̘r͇̠͜e͖̘͜ l̢̡͖a̟͎r͕̻̘g̟͔͔e̟̠ f͖̺͔u̙͓͓c͚̞̪k̺͜e̝͔̺r͓̘͇s̢̝͕

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 23:07, archived)

I have one on the dining table as we speak

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 23:44, archived)

DOG SHIT ON A STICK MOTHERFUCKERS!

(Runcorn shitty limits, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 21:48, archived)

arseboon dilbaro

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 21:53, archived)

and to a lesser extent, meaty wolf shits
mͫeͤaͣᴛⷮy woͦlf s͛hͪiͥᴛⷮs͛
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 22:39, archived)

Meaty oligarch frenzy at Heathrow Arrivals

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 23:07, archived)

⬅️nothing to declare| |meaty wolf shits➡️

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 23 Aug 2023, 0:00, archived)

Dog Shit!

(Jason Voorhees 🔪, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 15:57, archived)

is the same as wolf shit.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 16:04, archived)

How dare you!

(Runcorn shitty limits, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 16:49, archived)

In general terms, not to a fucking fecal connoisseur. General terms you fuck. Brown stinking sausage. General terms.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 23:00, archived)

I'd think wolf shit is both bigger and more meaty , wolves are large fuckers

( mongychops, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 17:29, archived)

Clickin dis

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 17:32, archived)

get knotted

( MiseryCunt sometimes the squirrel catches the dog, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 17:39, archived)

Just missed it
www.eptrail.com/2023/07/18/first-ever-fundraiser-and-concert-for-local-wolf-and-dog-sanctuary/
( mongychops, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 17:44, archived)

b3ta you mean?

(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Tue 22 Aug 2023, 16:32, archived)

No, it's just a bit of chocolate

( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 16:34, archived)

George Michael
Brown mouth careless with his Wispa
Lol
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 16:43, archived)

eh?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 23:03, archived)

Yes?

(Runcorn shitty limits, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 16:49, archived)

Another dogshit thread from hilarious poster 'smug bastard'

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 17:40, archived)

Fuck off you stupid fucking cunt spastic mongtard wankstain!
Kill yourself!
(Jason Voorhees 🔪, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 19:09, archived)

Brilliant!

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 19:16, archived)

Anyone want a cuppa?

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 14:00, archived)

Two cunts in mine please

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 14:03, archived)

You're already cunty enough

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 14:18, archived)

Yes and
I'm drinking a lovely lapsang right now.
( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 14:09, archived)

Call

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 14:18, archived)

I only drink first flush, soz

( Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 14:09, archived)

So does your mother

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 14:19, archived)

yes, I love powdered soup

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 14:11, archived)

You're not supposed to snort it

( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 14:18, archived)

Fuck

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 14:19, archived)

at least it explains why I keep picking crusty croutons out of my nose

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 14:23, archived)

-u +a

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 16:05, archived)

No thanks, I'll stick with my Dr. Pepper

( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 14:18, archived)

Nice

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 14:19, archived)

Earl Grey please
And a Hob Nob
Lol nob
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 14:33, archived)

make sure you turn the ring off before you nob on the hob
lol ring
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 14:42, archived)

+piece
Lol bum
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 15:33, archived)

I'm sorry, your TikToks are cringe, girlfriend.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 15:34, archived)

He posts on /board, doesn't he?
His name tags take at least twice as much effort as his pictures.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 15:35, archived)

Who do you mean?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 16:02, archived)

b3ta.com/search/posts/100908/best
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 16:09, archived)

oh ok. what an odd assortment of pics that is

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 16:28, archived)

Slightly reminds me of my first forays on here when I was finding my b3ta feet.
That was 15/16 years ago though, it's a weird throwback now.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 19:01, archived)

Oh perlease
I saw your "story" on "snap"
( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 15:40, archived)

Sweetie, EVERYBODY saw my story on snap

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 15:59, archived)

GUFFCHEESE
hi pillock's
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 10:28, archived)

Alright Queefs?

( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 10:57, archived)

not bad m8, u?

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 12:33, archived)

Alll boozed up!

( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 21:45, archived)

Hi Richard

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 11:10, archived)

Hi Michael

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 12:33, archived)

Bit rude
Lol cheese
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 11:15, archived)

rofl

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 12:34, archived)

KWEEF

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 11:29, archived)

GUNT

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 12:34, archived)

Hello
I've come to the conclusion that the cat is possessed
( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 12:20, archived)

hello there

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 12:34, archived)

All cats are possessed by the spirit of malignant stupidity.
Still, they're quite cute, I guess.
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 22 Aug 2023, 12:53, archived)

He is cute
But he wakes me up at 5.45 by biting my toes, then runs around nonstop for 4 hours. Then, he sits in the sink and meows for a bit, before crashing out on my bed for an hour. Then he starts all over again.
( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 13:24, archived)

Queefcheese

( Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 12:42, archived)

hullo wood-o

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 12:49, archived)

morning

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 7:07, archived)

0/
Hitler
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 8:29, archived)

Fuck you, Livecunt. Fuck you.

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 10:12, archived)

Great day on /chat today guys!

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 19:38, archived)

Fuck you, Livecunt. Fuck you.

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 19:50, archived)

Enjoy it while it lasts, I hear Rob's conspiring to close it soon.

( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 20:16, archived)

🙉

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 0:13, archived)

( ´･ω･)っ✂╰⋃╯

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 0:22, archived)

╔═══╦╦╦╦╦╦════╦╦╦╦═══════╦╦╦╦═╗
║╔══╣╚╬╬╣╠╗╔═╗║╚╬╬══╦═╦╗╔╬╬╣╠╗║
║╠╗╚╣║║╠╗╔╣╠╝║║║║╠╗╚╣╠╣╚╝║╠╗╔╣║
║╚══╩╩╩╝╚═╝╚═╝╚═╩╩══╩═╩══╩╝╚═╝║
╚═════════════════════════════╝
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 0:25, archived)

█▄─▄─▀█─▄▄─█▄─▄███▄─▄███─▄▄─█─▄▄▄─█▄─█─▄█─▄▄▄▄█
██─▄─▀█─██─██─██▀██─██▀█─██─█─███▀██─▄▀██▄▄▄▄─█
▀▄▄▄▄▀▀▄▄▄▄▀▄▄▄▄▄▀▄▄▄▄▄▀▄▄▄▄▀▄▄▄▄▄▀▄▄▀▄▄▀▄▄▄▄▄▀
( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 0:39, archived)

╔══╦╦═════════╗
║╔═╣╠╗╔╦══╦══╗║
║║║║║╚╝║║║╠╗╚╣║
║║╔╩╩══╩╩╩╩══╝║
╚╩╩═══════════╝

:D
/█\
.Π.
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 1:00, archived)

It did get sexual at one point

( $$ ✅, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 20:46, archived)

suck me off

( MiseryCunt sometimes the squirrel catches the dog, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 20:46, archived)

Which one are you again?

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 21 Aug 2023, 22:02, archived)

Baldmonkey

(THE MONGDADDY Wibble jib-jib!, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 22:05, archived)

In a way, I think we're all baldmonkey.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 21 Aug 2023, 23:01, archived)

No, that's wrong, I'm not.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 23:39, archived)

You fucking are, you liar

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 23:44, archived)

fuck
☺
/[]\
./\.
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 0:11, archived)

Now, get outside and spell your name out using parts from household appliances.

( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 10:18, archived)

Fuck of

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 22 Aug 2023, 0:11, archived)

Bollocks

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 16:44, archived)

NO U

( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 16:52, archived)

u no

( MiseryCunt sometimes the squirrel catches the dog, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 17:49, archived)

Bollocks

( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 20:12, archived)

Afternoon thread
Can we talk about lunch?
I am having a cheese butty. Fucking beat THAT!
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 12:42, archived)

SPAM

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 12:46, archived)

I know a song about that

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 12:51, archived)

is it this? I bet it is
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 15:56, archived)

Across the Universe
By Laibach
Close though
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 16:08, archived)

I love their version of 'One Vision.'

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 21 Aug 2023, 22:00, archived)

Is that the Bob Marley song 'One Love' tastefully edited for use on a specsavers ad?
Let's get together and read, alright?
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 23:02, archived)

I went pub

( broadsword, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 13:12, archived)

Pub is good

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 13:56, archived)

I'm still there

( mongychops, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 14:32, archived)

Have a few for me

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 16:05, archived)

beer or cock off

( MiseryCunt sometimes the squirrel catches the dog, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 13:24, archived)

Beer AND cock is the order of b3ta I reckon.
How’s you Cunt?
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 13:40, archived)

bit cuntish if i'm honest

( MiseryCunt sometimes the squirrel catches the dog, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 13:44, archived)

Just cock and no cunt?
Bit sexist tbh
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 13:58, archived)

I AM CUNTURE

( MiseryCunt sometimes the squirrel catches the dog, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 14:00, archived)

I might bomb your country
Or use a few drones I dunno yet
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 14:01, archived)

Mushroom soup
Might have a tin of peaches
( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 13:42, archived)

i've put reeses peanut choc cake thingies in the mouse traps
tnks for the tip
( MiseryCunt sometimes the squirrel catches the dog, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 13:45, archived)

Just make sure you clean your hands before baiting them
The little shits are suspicious of human smells
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 14:00, archived)

I'm a digital gonad so good luck with twat

( MiseryCunt sometimes the squirrel catches the dog, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 16:38, archived)

You're welcome

( Smash Monkey 2 Prozac is apparently good for menopause, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 20:29, archived)

Tinned fruit is great
Fuck the food snobs
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 13:57, archived)

Millions of peaches…

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 14:02, archived)

Walking on the beaches
Lol strikey l +n
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 14:29, archived)

I also had mushroom soup, oddly enough.
It was home-made with mushrooms I'd foraged myself, because I am an insufferable ponce
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 21 Aug 2023, 15:24, archived)

mushroomed ponce!

( MiseryCunt sometimes the squirrel catches the dog, Mon 21 Aug 2023, 16:24, archived)

OI'LL MOIDAH DA PAIR O' YOUSE!

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 21 Aug 2023, 17:54, archived)