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I really have no idea

Picked this flyer up whilst on my Brighton jaunt. It made me laugh like a drain, and then scared me in equal measure. Hi-ho-silver! I'll stick to sturdy girl and Shakira for my pony trekking.

(

SpunkyBackpack, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:56, archived)

(darkedge here) Bloody hell!

U got that in brighton?? I've never sen one of those and I live here..

How was the jaunt btw?

(

vulga is a foul mouthed cunt, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 14:03, archived)

aye

It was in this big antiques bazarr thing in the lanes, I have no idea what it was called but it had turnstiles on the way in - i remember this as I got said turnstile in the bollocks as I tried to follow my mate in. Jaunt was excellent, went to Sub or something or other on Saturday. Really nice old soul tunes. Got drunk rest of time. woo!

(

SpunkyBackpack, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 14:10, archived)

smart

glad u had fun in this sleepy seaside town

(

Darkedge, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 14:18, archived)

Was it this?

http://www.evilnet.net/~phil/pics/argies.JPG

(deviant dave, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:52, archived)

Was what this?

That was posted here over the weekend. I like.

Was it a b3tan creation or a glass cock?

(

Craymen, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:54, archived)

Now,

did Routine delete that, or did someone else?

(tomsk, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:56, archived)

Certainly wasn't me...

...I'm not that fucking rude.

(

routine has perfected burgers, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:59, archived)

The two are not mutually exclusive

To qualify for glass cock status, a picture only needs to be posted lots of times.

However, this pic is not b3tan in origin.

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:57, archived)

must disagree there mr bucket

if its reposted a lot of times and it is by a b3tan, it would be a time spaz

you need to check the dictionary :)

(

DaWolfey, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 14:03, archived)

a timespaz is a repost.

A glass cock is something that is continually reposted, a lot.

Time spaz and glass cock are also not mutually exclusive.

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 14:09, archived)

Remember: If you try to fix a language

you kill it. I vote for Lumpbucket's interpretation though...

(tomsk, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 14:11, archived)

Are Mr.Pedantic or all the woo yays..

....glass cocks, or am I missing the point somewhwre?

(

routine has perfected burgers, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 14:18, archived)

on a purely technical level, yes they are but really. no.

A glass cock is a picture or link, that just gets posted over and over again - for example, the picture of the golfer woman who was kissing a glass cock like trophy (giggle).

(

DaWolfey, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 14:22, archived)

I'm newish, so ignore me, but..

to me it seems like its only a glass cock if people have seen the pic and don`t want to see it anymore. Woo Yays don`t come under that simply because therres little nicer than being woo yayed (except maybe getting a front page)

I`ll go now....

(

Spunkmeyer, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 14:25, archived)

I thought....

a glass cock was a pic that starts life on B3ta, gets meme'd around the Internet, and then re-appears on B3ta when some newbie posts it?

if not, what's the technical term for this phenomenon?

G

(

gster, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 14:27, archived)

i suppose it comes down to who posts it and where they got it from

If a b3tan makes a pic, posts it to the board, then keeps posting it because they want recognition then it's a timespaz

if it's a pic a b3tan made and it gets posted by lots of different people who get it via email (for example) then it would become a glass cock

So if it's a self promotion thing - then timespaz
anything else - glass cock
That's my interpretation anyway

(

DaWolfey, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 14:24, archived)

Oh, right,

I agree with you too then. I agree with everyone. That's nice and easy. Groovey.

(tomsk, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 14:27, archived)

things where getting tough

in the popbitch/b3ta wars

(JBoom, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:49, archived)

err war?

no we all to nice for that.. if those wankers wanna start a war.. we'll just potatoshop more kittens - see how they like that!

(

Darkedge, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 14:08, archived)

Video Games From the 70's

(plankton, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:41, archived)

hahahahahahahah
ahahahahha

ahahahahahahah

have i made my point?

(rawx, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:41, archived)

that is

cool.... Woo Yay!

(HungOver, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:41, archived)

Retro:

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:44, archived)

oh yes!

Superb!

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:44, archived)

you byowty!

(

witchy is covered in BEES, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:44, archived)

Now,

That IS good!
W/Y/H/H

(

JayBeeEmm, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:45, archived)

grrrr8

indeedy :)

(JBoom, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:51, archived)

father jack lego

(garry, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:38, archived)

Yay!

Feck! Drink!

(tomsk, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:40, archived)

I want one of those

brilliant

(

fastcar, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:40, archived)

I would

love to have that.

(

Wifey, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:40, archived)

Oh bravo you!

Spiffing job old bean!

(

adverse_camber, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:40, archived)

amazing

that is fucking brilliant.

(

mikeisbrill, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:41, archived)

top

(

monkeon schmonkeon, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:41, archived)

genius

btw. has anyone got that "Eat football, sleep football, drink coke" ad?

(rawx, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:42, archived)

nice

(

izb posting occasional messages since 2001, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:43, archived)

hehe

blinding

(

youknowyouloveit, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:44, archived)

Quality!

Front Page, Front Page, Front Page, etc, etc

(

Spunkmeyer, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:44, archived)

hurrah!

well deserved too!

(

Spunkmeyer, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:52, archived)

Beaten to it...

Darn.

(Choaderboy, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:44, archived)

That too

is top quality, sir.

(

Spunkmeyer, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:45, archived)

No shame in coming second

with that fine effort. Face is spot on too

(

adverse_camber, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:47, archived)

great minds think alike, etc etc

that is also well bloody good.

(

mikeisbrill, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:47, archived)

yours reminds me of

dizzy, the game on the spectrum

(garry, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 14:19, archived)

Dr P

Just emailed you. I have a taker for your tickets, if they're still free! Woo!

(

Wifey, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:37, archived)

ah-ha!

I will find out for you...

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:40, archived)

Oooh

excited!

(

Wifey, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:43, archived)

Well that's that then.

I've put my people in touch with your people and we'll see what happens.

(

Wifey, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 14:08, archived)

probly already done...

but can't be arsed to spaz all the way back

(

FlanFlinger 🥧, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:36, archived)

Spazz

further down the page =)

(HungOver, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:38, archived)

I got this email the other day:

Owing to the depressingly crap week I've had, I have to go out on Saturday
night.

Matt & Lee should be coming(spoke to lee yesterday). So must you. I Assume
you will?

James

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:35, archived)

oi lumpy

did you get my email? i sent it to the address off yer website.

(

mikeisbrill, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:38, archived)

Yes I did

but I havent looked at it yet because I havent had a chance to.

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:42, archived)

alright cool

its shitty as hell.

(

mikeisbrill, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:45, archived)

variation on a meme

and he does it for photoshopping kittens as well

(alfons, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:30, archived)

AHA!

So thats why Domo was killing a kitten in the other picture! The circle is complete...

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:32, archived)

interestingly

~~i bought a pornographic magazine the other day~~ a friend of mine bought a pornographic magazine the other day, and it had the 'every time you masturbate...' god domo-kun pic on its joke page. whoever made it should so have loads of money.

(

mikeisbrill, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:35, archived)

and somehow I suspect

that they haven't had a penny.

(

rob, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:39, archived)

nor any fame

Just some mystery-photoshopper, whose friends don't believe him when he says he did it...

(alfons, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:42, archived)

......

(garry, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:17, archived)

Hehhehe

Hehehe - sweet.

(

helmetcream, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:20, archived)

I think the one on the left looks more

like Ardal O'Hanlon than Ardal O'Hanlon does.

(

adverse_camber, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:21, archived)

you are right

isn't that strange...

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:23, archived)

Lego Father Ted.

That would rock.
Even better than Lego Star Wars.

(tomsk, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:24, archived)

I'd like to see Father Jack

(

rob, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:27, archived)

He looks like he's

wearing a Dog collar so perhaps there's where it's from.

Who wants to PotatoShop a Lego Father Jack?

(

adverse_camber, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:28, archived)

i'd rather have a larger-scale father jack with one of those strings at the back

so you pull it and he shouts 'Feck! Arse! Girls!'

(

mikeisbrill, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:31, archived)

i love the expression on the faces of lego men

they are so happy and uncomplicated, i envy them. look at that smile. he is lovely and happy, and i want to be like him.

(

mikeisbrill, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:24, archived)

He's so happy

because he's got such a smashing jumper.

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:25, archived)

Why

to lego men still have retro 80's clothing?

(HungOver, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:26, archived)

No ammount of hip design can change the fact that they're wearing plastic.

Not a good look for anyone...

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:28, archived)

Seen a shapely woman

in a PVC catsuit recently?

...

I've err... got to.. umm... nip off to the lav for a sec... :)

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:30, archived)

Yeah, there's loads wandering about my office...

Mind you, Diana Rigg in the Avengers... mmm... ;)

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:32, archived)

hoo boy!

hose me down!

(

mikeisbrill, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:33, archived)

My point exactly :)

(and yes, she was such a babe... mmmmmm... :)

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:34, archived)

I was going to say that I can see your point now,

but I think I'd better not. Still, not big on rubber generally, but Ms Rigg is clearly the exception.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:35, archived)

where do you work?

do you have any jobs going?

(

youknowyouloveit, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:35, archived)

If only I weren't making it up.

You really don't want to work in my office, its shite. :(

Moan over.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:37, archived)

bugger

I think you need to 'slightly' alter the dress regulations: PVC catsuits must be worn by all fine looking female staff.

That'd be great.

(

youknowyouloveit, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:42, archived)

That should be made compulsory

in all offices in the country.

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:45, archived)

any political party

that puts that in their maniwhatdyacallit would get my vote

(

youknowyouloveit, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:52, archived)

oh you boys

what ARE you like.

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:59, archived)

Pervy.

Work makes us strange...

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 14:04, archived)

caught

would be my word for it

(

youknowyouloveit, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 14:13, archived)

because the 80s

will never die.

(

mikeisbrill, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:29, archived)

Was in the pub on saturday and they were playing 80's music. When thinking about the 80's grange hill instantly springs to mind... why is this?

(HungOver, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:31, archived)

Because

you used to watch Grange Hill in the 80s?

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:32, archived)

Yes

may be. i was just wandering if this was the same for anyone else?

(HungOver, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:34, archived)

I could never watch beyond the comic-book style opening.

The prog. never lived up to the flying sausage...

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:40, archived)

I don't think it flew

it just sort of appeared on a fork with a "POW!" kind of effect in someones face.

But yes, that was much better than the actual programme.

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:53, archived)

Because they

used to show it in the 80s?

Whenever I chop vegetables I think of Salisbury. Work that one out.

(

adverse_camber, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:34, archived)

You can't spell Sainsburys.

Er..?

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:39, archived)

Every time I masturbate

I think of attractive women, and having sexual intercourse with them.

I think I know why that is though :)

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 14:01, archived)

And then god kills a kitten

...

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 14:08, archived)

hur hur hur hur hur

hur hur hur hur hur hur hur

(

mikeisbrill, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 14:10, archived)

And judging from the shape of their hands

they are rather well endowed.

Hence the smile I suppose.

(

chthonic, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:27, archived)

OMG

you are so right... hmmmm

(

Lula too poor to pay attention, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:34, archived)

To make it more interesting

Tyson will fight Lewis inside an old style telephone box, one quarter full of rose apples outside St Pancras station. Tyson is keen, but Lennox is distracted when he spots a five pence coin on the street outside.

(

aubergene, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:15, archived)

name the drugs

and the supplier.

(

mikeisbrill, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:21, archived)

Hee hee

do you think they are allowed to phone a friend?

(

chthonic, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:26, archived)

it would be too difficult

with the gloves and everything

(

aubergene, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:30, archived)

that and having

to remember the number

(

chthonic, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:35, archived)

hmmmmm

indeed. should we worry for you ?

(JBoom, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:26, archived)

you think i'm joking?

you obviously have never lived in King's Cross...

(

aubergene, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:30, archived)

Yay for random humour.

gotta love it!

(

Spunkmeyer, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:39, archived)

...

i have a mental age of 11 so i feel i can get away with this one

p.s. sorry about the size, cant the damn thing to stay small :(

(

the_fabulous_dancing_yak You like game? You come see 5punk.co.uk. You like!, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:11, archived)

and as if by magic

i now look foolish cos its sorted itself out...

(

the_fabulous_dancing_yak You like game? You come see 5punk.co.uk. You like!, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:14, archived)

hehe

that is a kind of glass cock... someone seems to do that every month :)

Not having a go though, it still makes me laugh...

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:24, archived)

...

(garry, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:10, archived)

(qwerty, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:10, archived)

He'll be the one

going SPONG by the looks of things...

(

chthonic, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:11, archived)

you fool !!!

(JBoom, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:09, archived)

new artic fighter.....?

stealth is not it's selling point I fear...

(SF, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:14, archived)

i got this email

ATTN: PRESIDENT/CEO
DEAR FRIEND,
I AM MRS. SESE-SEKO WIDOW OF LATE PRESIDENT
MOBUTU SESE-SEKO OF ZAIRE? NOW KNOWN AS
DEMOCRATIC REPUBLIC OF CONGO (DRC). I AM MOVED
TO WRITE YOU THIS LETTER, THIS WAS IN CONFIDENCE
CONSIDERING MY PRESENT CIRCUMSTANCE AND
SITUATION. I ESCAPED ALONG WITH MY HUSBAND
AND TWO OF OUR SONS BENSONAND KENNEDY OUT OF
DEMOCRATIC REPUBLIC OF CONGO (DRC) TO ABIDJAN,
COTE D’IVOIRE WHERE MY FAMILY AND I SETTLED,
WHILE WE LATER MOVED TO SETTLED IN MORROCO
WHERE MY HUSBAND LATER DIED OF CANCER DISEASE.
HOWEVER DUE TO THIS SITUATION WE DECIDED TO
CHANGED MOST OF MY HUSBAND'S BILLIONS OF
DOLLARS DEPOSITED IN SWISS BANK AND OTHER
COUNTRIES INTO OTHER FORMS OF MONEY CODED

SNIP

(

monkeon schmonkeon, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:06, archived)

have I encouraged "post your spam" day? Oops.

(

rob, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:07, archived)

sorry

you just reminded me of how sinister that one was.

(

monkeon schmonkeon, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:08, archived)

I have

Had about 5 or 6 of these all from different countries?? coincidence or what?

(HungOver, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:10, archived)

there's a generic name

for this kind of scam, isn't there? Like The Spanish prisoner, but obviously not that.

(elwid, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:14, archived)

manipulating the gullible by playing on thier greed?

er.. a bit long I suppose.

(

rob, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:16, archived)

It's called

a 901 fraud or some other 3 digit number like that
(named after the Nigerian penal code against it - most of this stuff comes from Nigeria, or used to)

(

chthonic, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:23, archived)

419

I think

(

rogan, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 14:11, archived)

Yay!

Free money! Go for it!

(tomsk, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:08, archived)

Couldn't be arsed to read all of that

but I'm pretty sure that I heard that on radio4 a couple of months back. How strange...

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:09, archived)

I can't read caps

it hurts my eyes

(

rob, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:10, archived)

Toy guns should never be fired near the face.

Did your parents teach you nothing?

Leaves, quietly...

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:17, archived)

congratulations

i think that geniunely is the worst joke ever made on this board.

(

mikeisbrill, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:22, archived)

I try my best (or worst).

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:26, archived)

that guy

was spamming our website with this too, ive banned him about 4 times with different usernames..

(garry, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:10, archived)

you should start a comedy correspondence

like this www.savannahsays.com/kizombe.htm

(

adverse_camber, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:13, archived)

Just send it

here

(Wallz, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:15, archived)

I get that one about

four times a week plus letters and faxes as I work in the Financial services sector - It originated in Nigeria and has spread across most African countries so far!!

There are loads to be found here

(

Ted, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:19, archived)

hey wow!

I got one very similar from a guy called Oloye Benson. Ostensibly a lawyer from Nigeria. He was asking me to hlpe him smuggle millions from his homeland. I played along and had quite a good banter with him. HE wanted me to meet his broker, Mr Wesley, in Amsterdam..and gave me his mobile. Reply to him, Monkeon. See if his response begins with "Sequel o my last correspondence". If it does then it's the same con man.

(milk_explosion, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:31, archived)

I sent him

Justin Topper's horoscope number and told him he'd left his caps lock on.

He hasn't yet replied.

(

monkeon schmonkeon, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:45, archived)

there was

a program on the BBC about this not so long ago. I think it was put down to unemployment out there, thousands of people do it. I believe the nigerian police have a special department to deal with it all.

(

youknowyouloveit, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:32, archived)

Im a

Bit surprised now just how many people are doing the Lego person lookalike thingy's
www.theory.org.uk/lego.htm

Its a new fever, a lego fever.

(

keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Mon 10 Jun 2002, 13:05, archived)

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