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[challenge entry]
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 13:32, archived)
# Is that the ghost of Christmas now?
Or the ghost of Christmas then?
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 13:49, archived)
# pfft
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 13:50, archived)
# Haha
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 13:51, archived)
[challenge entry] :)
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 13:08, archived)
# you rolled it......
the wrong way!
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 14:02, archived)
[challenge entry] My cats just want to say Merry Christmas
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:57, archived)
# your cats also want souls
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:58, archived)
# BP THIS NOW
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 13:03, archived)
#
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 13:08, archived)
# spirograph cat
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 13:09, archived)
# Ohh... vicious cat
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 13:08, archived)
# That's really quite horrible
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 13:10, archived)
# lovelyblinkaction
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 13:24, archived)
# proper lol faces
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 13:51, archived)
[challenge entry] On the first day of smugmas...
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:51, archived)
# Haha awesome
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:58, archived)
#
smug stained windows. Nice
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 13:44, archived)
# beautifully done
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 13:50, archived)
# Christ wants that croissant
and he'll turn your Perrier into Chateauneuf-du-Pape if you agree, you smug bastard.
(, Sun 15 Dec 2013, 13:36, archived)
[challenge entry] "aww, he's got your beard Samma"
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:29, archived)
# ahhhh ha ha ha ha ha ha
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:29, archived)
# "Round yon virgin mother..."
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:31, archived)
[challenge entry] that's just lovely
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:33, archived)
# haha
Nothing like a good roast at Christmas!
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:36, archived)
# pfffffttt........!
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:40, archived)
# NO!
He has her beard
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:41, archived)
# Ha! excellent :D
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 13:17, archived)
# Nice one
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 14:01, archived)
[challenge entry] huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh etc.
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:27, archived)
# Huh huh, huh huh
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:32, archived)
[challenge entry]
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:04, archived)
# and a merry cuntmas to you too.
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:12, archived)
# proper christmas cards
Tell them like it is
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:30, archived)
# Cunting fuckmas
and a wanky new shite!
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:33, archived)
#

(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 13:09, archived)
# A festive solution to that Damien Hirst art theft :D
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:56, archived)
# how about a reindeer sawn in half?
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:02, archived)
# :D
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:04, archived)
# How about a reindeer sawing a shark in half?
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 13:44, archived)
# Maybe they were stolen by art critics

...have they checked the bins around the back?
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:18, archived)
# *steals idea to actually do at home*
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:35, archived)
# i'd prefer my version of his art
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:44, archived)
[challenge entry] Humbug sniff shit
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:38, archived)
# hahaha
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:40, archived)
# *prints out*
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:50, archived)
[challenge entry] ha ha
I'll add this here
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:51, archived)
# :D
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:57, archived)
#
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:00, archived)
# hahaha....

(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:03, archived)
# *pees on earth*
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:23, archived)
# Is this an Altered Beast end of level boss?
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 13:45, archived)
# Nicely
..
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 14:55, archived)
# Help us choose the new Question of the Week
Every week we pose a new question, the funniest and best (and sometimes the worst UTTER LIES) end up in the newsletter.

Help us to choose this week's question from these suggestions:

Bizarre leaps of logic - "I once humorously suggested that someone had been internet-stalking a Big Brother contestant. They concluded that I was threatening them. What's the oddest misunderstanding you've been involved in?"

Toilet disasters - Because we're juvenile and want to read stories about poo.

Dance like nobody's watching - What do you do when you think you're alone. Apart from 'masturbate furiously', obviously.





Vote closes one I return from the office Christmas dinner and finish bowking rich, brown vomit into a hedge.
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:32, archived)
# All of the above, rolled into one.
Toilet trouble leading to dancing about via a leap of logic as to what the best remedy for the situation is
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:34, archived)
# Why is the gayshift not allowed to vote? Why?
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:38, archived)
# Why are North Koreans not allowed to vote?
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:39, archived)
# Why are inhabitants of Omicron Persei 8 not allowed to vote?
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:49, archived)
# why does my heart, feel so bad
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:53, archived)
# Why, why, why Delilah
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:53, archived)
# Why do birds suddenly appear?
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:58, archived)
# Why Em See aye?
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:58, archived)
# Why chromasome?
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:01, archived)
# This is brilliant, one of AB's suggestions and two of mine.
Either way, people will be upset.
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:07, archived)
# Why, why, why, Delilah?
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:07, archived)
# Why, eh, why? Thanks rob
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:30, archived)
# Why doesn't everyone just discuss Ringoffires mental breakdown for a week
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:31, archived)
# I'm glad it was referred to in one of the other answers
otherwise, as he has me on ignore, I'd have missed that particular masterpiece.

Is he really running five simultaneous accounts?
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:45, archived)
# It's like watching a dog that's been hit by a car flailing around dying
You try to turn away but find yourself looking back to see if it has stopped yet
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 13:14, archived)
# Not really, I'd want to help the dog
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 13:21, archived)
# Why, oh why, oh why
very nearly spells 'yoyo'
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:45, archived)
# Why did the chicken cross the road?
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:51, archived)
[challenge entry]
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:25, archived)
[challenge entry] pea
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:27, archived)
[challenge entry] Hackney Council Christmas Card Compo'
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:23, archived)
# *Guilty LOLs*
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:31, archived)
[challenge entry] O little town of Bethlehem, How still we see thee burn
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:15, archived)
# 'Israel' Defense Forces
not to be pedantic. Oh and they've never bombed Bethlehem, but apart from that, well done.

(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:26, archived)
# ooh look at the star in the sky!
oww, my hurt
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:40, archived)
# :)
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 13:08, archived)
# Looking for a Casio graph....
I saw there were some connoisseurs here:

I have an offer for an original Casio 35 (not the 35+) for 30 Euro... Is is stupid buy this at this price?

PS - It needs to be a Casio, our course literature for material science is written for a 25+ or above.

PPS - I've been pulling my hair with this integral:
integrate (x/(1+3x)^4) dx
Solution -(9x+1)/54(1+3x)^3 +cte
I just need a pointer on how to do it... It's in a chapter about the substitution method, but it might be a mistake.

PPPS Sorry about being a mathspamcunt.
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:10, archived)
#
integrate (x/(1+3x)^4) dx
hmm seperate the x and (1+3x)^(-4) terms then integrate by parts.
There will be a trig substitution for 1/(1+3x) iirc
a^2+u^2 substitute u=a*tan(theta), where a=1 and u=sqrt(3x), that 4th power bit will probably come in handy but its a nasty problem (I hate integration by substitution).
Giving, 1/((1+3x)^4)=1/(a*tan(theta))^4,
I hope this helps :)
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:42, archived)
# my brain just liquefied and leaked out of my ears
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:46, archived)
# hehe
That happened to me months ago....bleurgh
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:52, archived)
#
My cats breath smells of cat food...
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:54, archived)
# This is my sandbox. I'm not allowed to go in the deep end.
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:05, archived)
# 'don't you see Bart, rdr^2?'
rdrr
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:11, archived)
# Oohh dear
Weird how the simple looking ones are a bitch to do...

Ta!
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:03, archived)
#
Just realised that,
x=1/3(tan(theta))^2,
so there should be some nice cancelations to make!
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:10, archived)
# Like this?
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 15:47, archived)
# WTF!
Never posted such a big picture...
Must be important.
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 15:47, archived)
# Looks like winner!
Have a celebratory woo
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 15:55, archived)
# But but but
is that thing I did with the "t" to find the "x" legal? I was totally ad-libing there...
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 17:17, archived)
# seems ok as you did define x, t, dx, dt, might be worth showing dx/dt or dt/dx to show how you got dx & dt though...
As far as I can see your equals signs hold everywhere which means it must be true! If the question didn't demand a specific substitution you should be fine. Merry Christams and good luck, also what is your field of study?
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 18:02, archived)
# Engineering watch officer
Aka officer that's a mechanic on-board big ships (500 tons up).
Started last year. Passed all my exams except maths...
So I'm on the lookout for math trickery involving integrals and derivatives.
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 18:06, archived)
# And trigonemetry
But the calculus kind...
Cos(x)^3=cos(1-sin(x)^2) mumbo jumbo.
I'm so shit at trigo...
That's why I do thermodynamics and no map reading.
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 18:17, archived)
# Trig is a bastard, it's worth knowing the complex exponential forms of sine and cosine as you can then avoid trying to remember the identities.
ie.
sin(x)=1/(2i)(e^(ix)-e^(-ix))
and,
cos(x)=1/2(e^(ix)+e^(-ix)
where,
i=sqrt(-1) (you might know 'i' as 'j')
Other than that I can only tell you the trick to learning maths is do lots of problems,
until your sick of em...
and then do some more.
Good luck with your studies :D
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 20:34, archived)
[challenge entry] Spaffy Xmas from Clegg
clegg
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:02, archived)
# That man
Has no taste in Ikea couches.
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:11, archived)
# Good for hiding the stains though.
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:21, archived)
[challenge entry] Happy b3ta Xmas Everyone
You're all super dooper!


Click for bigger (360 kb)
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 10:43, archived)
# merry xmas your all cunts
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 10:48, archived)
# epic
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 10:50, archived)
# Cheers!
I was going to put more in but then the boss decided to walk past my desk. Git.
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:20, archived)
[challenge entry] Baubles
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 10:39, archived)
# subtle :)
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 10:50, archived)
[challenge entry] wonderful. just, wonderful.
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 10:32, archived)
# Perfect for the terrorist pervert in every family
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 10:51, archived)
[challenge entry]
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 10:31, archived)
# my cousin is born on christmas day
celebrates xmas up to noon, then his birthday the rest of the day.
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 10:34, archived)
# Hahahahaha
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 10:51, archived)
# haha oh yes
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:36, archived)
# This is why we Capricorns are such moody, serious bastards as kids
Nothing to do with astrology, more the fact that all our tight relatives palmed us off with just the one present and we got BITTER.
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 16:30, archived)
[challenge entry] Pearoast
From last week.
This is the card I gave to Prof Slobberthwait, (the elf), my specialist at the M/c Dental Horsepickle.

(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 10:21, archived)
# I'm going to go in to my nearest McDonalds and ask for a McDental Horsepickle
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 10:57, archived)
# Horsepickle
At McDonalds it's actually a drink. From British and Irish organic horses.
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 11:55, archived)
# I just had 2 McRibs yesterday!
McD's only offers them for a few weeks out of the year, because it takes 11 months to collect enough eyeballs, spleens and nose gristle to make them
(, Thu 12 Dec 2013, 12:20, archived)

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