b3ta.com links
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Home » Links » Archive 9496 (Older | Newer)

This is a link post Who said it? Trump or Buddy from Elf?
Grauniad Quiz. I got 14/15!
 (CADmonkey rollllllllled another one, just like the other one, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 17:08, Reply)
This is a normal post 13/15
Putin wouldn't trust me
 (I helped save b3ta! willenium Fist bump for verification, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 19:07, Reply)
This is a normal post 14/15
I guess the idea was that you wouldn't be able to tell them apart but so far it's a pretty good average here
 (I helped save b3ta! The_cold_stare Coming here only when very, very bored, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 23:00, Reply)
This is a normal post 11/15
Putin is adjusting windage as I type this.
 (smellysamlyingcable Seaman on, Sun 24 Dec 2017, 6:01, Reply)
This is a normal post
15/15. Only because my work's Hexmas night consisted of 9 people sat in a lecture theatre watching Elf in silence. Never again.
 (I helped save b3ta! joetotale blear-e'ed, wither'd spectre, Sun 24 Dec 2017, 17:47, Reply)
This is a normal post Was it the 0x19 of December?

(smellysamlyingcable Seaman on, Sun 24 Dec 2017, 19:47, Reply)
This is a link post A breakdown of Gruber's incredible skid in Die Hard I made this!
Always loved this bit. Blap blap skiiiiiiidddd.
(dogfood, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 14:26, Reply)
This is a normal post MP5.
edit: HK94, apparently
 (I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 14:39, Reply)
This is a normal post Looks like an MP5 to me.
The 94 has a silly-looking extended barrel and is only semi-automatic.
 (I helped save b3ta! jonbob loves you, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 20:12, Reply)
This is a normal post Hey Theresa May
Are you seeing this? These two nut jobs are talking about guns. They seem to know a little too much about them if you ask me.
 (I helped save b3ta! Jeffrey44 (User was banned for this post), Sat 23 Dec 2017, 20:19, Reply)
This is a normal post Here
www.imfdb.org/wiki/Die_Hard#Submachine_Guns
 (I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 22:50, Reply)
This is a normal post The internet is full of guns
Better lock it up.

And dicks. As T May’s executive parliamentary research team found out.
 (smellysamlyingcable Seaman on, Sun 24 Dec 2017, 4:56, Reply)
This is a link post Pop!
*Makes note to follow wheresthefish 's financial advice in future*
 (I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 9:44, Reply)
This is a normal post I only hope he followed it.
Spotting a bubble near the top is easy from the outside, a lot harder from inside.
 (I helped save b3ta! wheresthefish Partly filled with wrong, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 10:26, Reply)
This is a normal post I've got a bunch of shares that have gone up and down a lot.
If I Could have predicted the peaks I would be very wealthy now.
 (I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 12:28, Reply)
This is a normal post Well if you’re looking for investment advice from me
then I’ve got an excellent opportunity for you to invest in: Christmas tree sales have been growing exponentially over the last month.
 (I helped save b3ta! wheresthefish Partly filled with wrong, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 12:49, Reply)
This is a normal post Spotting a bauble near the top is easy from the outside.

(I helped save b3ta! Mudface The web isn't callipygian, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 13:05, Reply)
This is a normal post *applauds*

(I helped save b3ta! wheresthefish Partly filled with wrong, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 13:50, Reply)
This is a normal post {:-D

(I helped save b3ta! FeralCatMan Long ads need comments sections, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 21:50, Reply)
This is a normal post There's a black swan event approaching that spread
I'd be long champagne now. Alpha from the source, my friends, alpha from the source,
Also- buy long-dated blue cardboard future. Going to be bigger than Ben Hur.
 (I helped save b3ta! The Ann Coulter Fan Club Babylon is burning at, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 15:08, Reply)
This is a link post While I find Mock The Week a trifle contrived and try hard at times
Watching them rip the piss out of Dara made me lol
(I helped save b3ta! simbosan is too tired, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 7:48, Reply)
This is a normal post Not just a big head
00:55 "… written underneath that was Extra Large Colon …
 (I helped save b3ta! wakeupandsmellthebacon, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 11:27, Reply)
This is a normal post
I was thinking of making one of these compilation things, of every time Compo sexually harasses Nora Batty.
 (Lifelong Conservative Voter is still voting for the conservatives, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 15:30, Reply)
This is a normal post Yes, enjoyed that
Got kicked out of the front room for laughing and ruining that Sky Christmas special with Jason Manford. Let me say it wasn't me that ruined that heap of shit
 (I helped save b3ta! The_cold_stare Coming here only when very, very bored, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 23:36, Reply)
This is a normal post Who the F is Jason Manford?
Edit; did research! He’s the Tesco Value Kevin James.
Kevin James is a bore.
 (smellysamlyingcable Seaman on, Sun 24 Dec 2017, 6:07, Reply)
This is a link post Happy Christmas.

(I helped save b3ta! Prufrock Lucifer, son of the morning!, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 6:43, Reply)
This is a normal post Misleading preview, I thought it was a flaming Christmas pud.

(I helped save b3ta! wakeupandsmellthebacon, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 9:43, Reply)
This is a normal post He's put the kettle on
He hasn't actually made the tea though.
 (I helped save b3ta! wheresthefish Partly filled with wrong, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 10:40, Reply)
This is a normal post Posted 20 hours ago...
...and 2.2M views.
 (I helped save b3ta! Prestidigitus will set this 'ere black puddin on you, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 17:14, Reply)
This is a link post Doubling down
New US ambassador Pete Hoekstra claims that reports of him saying that reports of him saying there are no-go areas in the Netherlands are “Fake News” is Fake News
(I helped save b3ta! wakeupandsmellthebacon, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 5:04, Reply)
This is a normal post That makes my day,
I'm in Michigan, but not the district he came from. Well, I guess I will now have to deal with fake, fake news.
 (I helped save b3ta! tromboner cherophobia is my kind of fun, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 5:24, Reply)
This is a normal post The over the shoulder “this guy is an idiot” look is marvellous
The Dutch are going to have a field day with this.
 (smellysamlyingcable Seaman on, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 7:08, Reply)
This is a normal post While a slippery grasp on truth and honesty are useful skills for diplomacy
This guy isn't exactly skilled at it.
 (I helped save b3ta! wheresthefish Partly filled with wrong, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 9:47, Reply)
This is a normal post Whatever happened to plausible deniability
and being able to remember what you said barely a minute ago
 (I helped save b3ta! wakeupandsmellthebacon, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 11:29, Reply)
This is a normal post They’re fake news.
Or alternative facts. I forget which.
 (I helped save b3ta! wheresthefish Partly filled with wrong, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 11:51, Reply)
This is a normal post Or your thoughts process tank.
Like the little tank below.

That has currently only one like.

Not that I am bitter or anything.
 (smellysamlyingcable Seaman on, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 12:45, Reply)
This is a normal post I gave it a pity like
You are Oberleutnant Gruber AICMFP.
 (I helped save b3ta! wheresthefish Partly filled with wrong, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 12:55, Reply)
This is a normal post Two votes?
Totally vindicated, I’lI come back tomorrow with more fun.
 (smellysamlyingcable Seaman on, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 13:03, Reply)
This is a link post Indie Game Review: Party Hard 2 I made this!
It's apparently "Mad Friday", and if you're not out getting smashed and having a fight you're doing it wrong.

Here's a visual representation of what you're missing.
(I helped save b3ta! dogbomb, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 21:24, Reply)
This is a normal post That reminds me
I haven't had enough whiskey tonight.
 (I helped save b3ta! evil_andy Stick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 21:30, Reply)
This is a normal post That actually looks like a lot of stabby fun.

(I helped save b3ta! wheresthefish Partly filled with wrong, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 10:14, Reply)
This is a link post Happy Christmas!

(I helped save b3ta! Oysdgp there's nothing to smile ABOUT, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 20:30, Reply)
This is a normal post
I lasted sixteen minutes before it got too weird
 (MC Chicken Sandwich All I want for Christmas is your mum, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 14:56, Reply)
This is a normal post beautiful

(I helped save b3ta! ozof, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 20:17, Reply)
This is a link post Frank Zappa's house in estate agent video
I think Lady GaGa owns it now.
(I helped save b3ta! The Ann Coulter Fan Club Babylon is burning at, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 20:10, Reply)
This is a normal post Flogged because they are a dysfunctional bunch of control freaks (or some of them were/are anyway)
My small brief contact with Gail certainly confirmed that.

Always nice to hear Peaches again though.
 (I helped save b3ta! Thrill_My_Chinchilla is old and unimproved, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 21:02, Reply)
This is a normal post IKR
It's very sad. But with Frank as pater familias, how could it not be full of control freaks? Love to hear your Gail story....
Yous is what you am.
 (I helped save b3ta! The Ann Coulter Fan Club Babylon is burning at, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 21:06, Reply)
This is a normal post It's not that much. I had the first run of Beat The Boots on CD, which was released as separate discs as well as the box.
So I built it up piecemeal. And then found Tengo Na MInchia Tanta from Beat The Boots 2, on its own, in a 2nd Hand CD shop. It is GREAT - as far as I'm concerned, better than Fillmore East 71 - great music, decent gags, and nice sound quality. But Beat The Boots 2 was only ever released as the whole Box as one set. Beat The Boots 3 was released as MP3 download only a few years ago, so I emailed via Zappa.com to ask whether or not they might rerelease Series 2 as downloads as well, so I could get the others I was missing, as I had found this single cd in a 2nd Hand Shop, and thought it was really, really good, so I'd definitely get all of them.

The reply from Gail was that there are no plans to release the series again, and can I please give the address of the shop that sold me that album, as they shouldn't be doing that, so she wanted to get the authorities involved with the shopkeeper!!

(I got the original box 2 eventually, just over £100 off eBay, which was a pretty good deal for 7 albums, but none of the others are quite as good though it's got the "Smoke On The Water" gig. So I've got a duplicate cd, somewhere in my collection)

Looks like it's worth double that now.
 (I helped save b3ta! Thrill_My_Chinchilla is old and unimproved, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 21:32, Reply)
This is a normal post She should have married steve fucking jobs
That is a whole new level of strange.
I think you should strap the whole thing together, put it all online. Dedicated to her and Ahmet.
 (I helped save b3ta! The Ann Coulter Fan Club Babylon is burning at, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 21:44, Reply)
This is a normal post There are so many unofficial Boots/radio shows out there now
I doubt anyone would be that interested these days.
 (I helped save b3ta! Thrill_My_Chinchilla is old and unimproved, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 22:05, Reply)
This is a normal post I spend a lot of time watching interviews with ex-Zappa band members
He was clearly mental and a genius. I feel sorry for Dweezil who is actually trying to keep the music live.
 (I helped save b3ta! The Ann Coulter Fan Club Babylon is burning at, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 22:09, Reply)
This is a normal post Totally.
Gail deliberately not splitting the inheritance into 4 equal parts was such an obvious "fuck you" to Dweezil and Moon, it was very, very sad.
 (I helped save b3ta! Thrill_My_Chinchilla is old and unimproved, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 23:09, Reply)
This is a normal post Kickass Clarinets or whatever they are
I loved the paintbrush with no paint appearing.
Want to have a sip of Knob.
Made me want more money.
 (I helped save b3ta! gaijintendo Regular Member, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 21:04, Reply)
This is a normal post If you're interested,
It's the first track on this album
en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hot_Rats
Well, I suppose really it's the first track regardless of whether you're interested or not.
 (I helped save b3ta! Thrill_My_Chinchilla is old and unimproved, Sun 24 Dec 2017, 18:26, Reply)
This is a normal post That, I am now interested in.
Thank You
 (I helped save b3ta! gaijintendo Regular Member, Mon 25 Dec 2017, 22:18, Reply)
This is a normal post The creatures outside...
..looked from pig to man, and from man to pig, and from pig to man again; but already it was impossible to say which was which
 (I helped save b3ta! The Ann Coulter Fan Club Babylon is burning at, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 19:39, Reply)
This is a normal post Yeah, Charlotte's Web is a cracking read.

(I helped save b3ta! Prufrock Lucifer, son of the morning!, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 20:11, Reply)
This is a normal post I thought that was from 'Babe'

(I helped save b3ta! The Ann Coulter Fan Club Babylon is burning at, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 20:13, Reply)
This is a normal post Lord of the Flies?

(I helped save b3ta! Prufrock Lucifer, son of the morning!, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 20:48, Reply)
This is a normal post Peppa Pig goes to the dentist

(I helped save b3ta! The Ann Coulter Fan Club Babylon is burning at, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 20:49, Reply)
This is a normal post What Babe?

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 21:41, Reply)
This is a normal post Not on your pornhub like list, I hope.
but somewhat despairingly.
 (I helped save b3ta! The Ann Coulter Fan Club Babylon is burning at, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 21:48, Reply)
This is a normal post I would google that, but I really don't want to see Bowie's thin white duke.

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 21:57, Reply)
This is a normal post The one with the power

(I helped save b3ta! Extinct Jesus Dossier "...I think it counteracts Hitler's magic...", Sat 23 Dec 2017, 15:30, Reply)
This is a normal post
Old conservatives reunion?
 (I helped save b3ta! DinivanX Has stinging piss after drinking Pact Coffee, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 11:12, Reply)
This is a link post happy crimbo cock lovers NSFW
this lion loves the taste of cock
 (harold shipmans surgery dances with patients, the wolves were on holiday, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 19:07, Reply)
This is a normal post Cannot unsee

(spunkyD, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 19:11, Reply)
This is a normal post *blocks user*

(I helped save b3ta! Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 19:30, Reply)
This is a normal post Simply lovleh

(I helped save b3ta! fluffybunnykiller Is feasting on the clitoris of life, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 20:50, Reply)
This is a normal post
This is no better than snuff. Please delete it
 (I helped save b3ta! RompaStompa Stick it up your jumper, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 20:49, Reply)
This is a normal post Fucking hell ow!

(I helped save b3ta! FeralCatMan Long ads need comments sections, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 21:05, Reply)
This is a normal post Chinny chin reckon

(I helped save b3ta! fluffybunnykiller Is feasting on the clitoris of life, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 18:51, Reply)
This is a normal post Both of them need to fuck off home
They have no chance
 (I helped save b3ta! The_cold_stare Coming here only when very, very bored, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 21:53, Reply)
This is a normal post They're doing it on purpose
to make darts look interesting and exciting.
 (I helped save b3ta! Tusk knows where you live, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 22:04, Reply)
This is a normal post moneyshot at 3:35
nothing happens before except nothing
 (I helped save b3ta! Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 8:16, Reply)
This is a link post Syrian modern Art
Or as the Russian author of the article puts it: “Kvadratish, praktish, gut! Utilitarian cubism”


 (smellysamlyingcable Seaman on, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 18:22, Reply)
This is a normal post Small tank
Big image. Forgot resize code.
 (smellysamlyingcable Seaman on, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 18:24, Reply)
This is a normal post from the Syrian Army's elite Al Assad 3rd Armourd division w give you the crack 1st splatoon

(I helped save b3ta! fluffybunnykiller Is feasting on the clitoris of life, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 18:50, Reply)
This is a normal post Are they available in pink?

(Master_Slob UK minister for cultural appropriation., Tue 26 Dec 2017, 19:20, Reply)
This is a normal post Enjoy it
Before you know it'll have grown up.
 (I helped save b3ta! FeralCatMan Long ads need comments sections, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 21:08, Reply)
This is a link post In these days of us being in the grip of Trump the fucking clown, May the useless fuckwitt, Turnbull the utter cunt and Putin the insane dictator,
I look back at Boris Yeltsin with a kind of affectionate nostalgia.
(I helped save b3ta! The Togaboy The world will end on, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 9:39, Reply)
This is a normal post Classy gentleman.
"...EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHHHHH..."
 (eViLegion Chief Commissioner of the Scottish Lunacy Board, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 14:10, Reply)
This is a normal post I did a lol at that bit
the first time, anyway
 (I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 22:00, Reply)
This is a normal post Oh how we laughed at Russian and Borris Yeltsin
Oh how teh tables have tured against us.
 (I helped save b3ta! fluffybunnykiller Is feasting on the clitoris of life, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 18:54, Reply)
This is a link post What to launch on a brand new rocket?
It seems unwise to put a billion-dollar satellite on it if you're worried it might go bang. Why not do this instead?

The original picture seems to have been erased from the internet, so have a new one instead:



Bonus pics of the rocket in question:

    
 (I helped save b3ta! evil_andy Stick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 9:30, Reply)
This is a normal post Seems a bit of a waste.
Bet they're a lot of Universities that would love to add a mini sat into that payload for nowt.

Guess there's no such thing as a free launch.
 (I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 10:59, Reply)
This is a normal post ISWYDT
Very good.
 (I helped save b3ta! evil_andy Stick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 11:26, Reply)
This is a normal post *applauds*

(I helped save b3ta! FeralCatMan Long ads need comments sections, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 16:41, Reply)
This is a normal post Is he going to claim it as the fastest electric car in history?

(I helped save b3ta! wheresthefish Partly filled with wrong, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 12:38, Reply)
This is a normal post In all honesty, why dont NASA sell the design or license Musk to build
Teh original F1 lift engines from the Saturn V?
With modern materiels these would make an awesome engine.
 (I helped save b3ta! fluffybunnykiller Is feasting on the clitoris of life, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 18:41, Reply)
This is a normal post
Well I'm sure Rocketdyne would still make them if anyone asked them. They built the original engines under contract for the Saturn rockets and there's still some talk about using them on an uprated SLS.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rocketdyne_F-1

Ultimately though SpaceX built their own engine from scratch as they wanted to control their supply lines to keep costs as low as possible. The Merlin engine they built is a pretty impressive beast in it's own right as it is fully reusable. Their next gen engine the Raptor is going to be a good deal more powerful than the Merlin and much more efficient than either.
 (I helped save b3ta! evil_andy Stick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 21:30, Reply)
This is a normal post Efficiency and availability of welders
Also, each engine was unique and fiddled with until it reached specs...
Some info here:
arstechnica.com/science/2013/04/how-nasa-brought-the-monstrous-f-1-moon-rocket-back-to-life/
 (smellysamlyingcable Seaman on, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 6:34, Reply)
This is a normal post why is it I don't fully trust Musk?
And once saw a video of spacex engineers that looked like some weird cult of high-fiving brogrammers
 (horrid, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 23:16, Reply)
This is a normal post Erm, most engineering teams are.
That why management never allows clients near us.

It does not help that last time they did, due to excessive grinding, my fireproof boilersuit caught fire, my colleagues put it out using a garden hose and we were laughing so hard tears were rolling down our faces.

Then the watertight door started beeping as it slowly opened.

And we laughed even harder.
 (smellysamlyingcable Seaman on, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 6:44, Reply)
This is a normal post I was thinking more the current cult of hacker man-children
Calling themselves 'ninjas' 'rockstars' and other such bollocks. I'm thinking more IT than physical engineering.
 (horrid, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 12:28, Reply)
This is a normal post OH you’re talking about electricians.
Bloody electricians/soft engineers ruin EVERYTHING.
 (smellysamlyingcable Seaman on, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 12:42, Reply)
This is a normal post ^this
I saw an ad for Javascript programmer in Shoreditch. They were asking for a 'software ronin'

FUCKOFFUCKOFFFUCKOFF

Fucking hipsters and their fucking Javascript and fucking black theme editors
 (I helped save b3ta! simbosan is too tired, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 14:52, Reply)
This is a normal post yep, exactly that
but at least there their mad skillz are only breaking websites rather than rockets
 (horrid, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 15:59, Reply)
This is a normal post In other rocket news:
Mitsubishi sent one up: youtube.com/watch?v=6AOFDc6zs8U
And Space X added 10 iridium satellites: www.theguardian.com/science/2017/dec/23/spacex-rocket-dazzles-in-california-sky-as-it-carries-10-satellites-into-space
 (smellysamlyingcable Seaman on, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 8:02, Reply)
This is a link post Scarfolk Council - taking back control


Points-Based Citizenship
 (I helped save b3ta! buffet_the_appetite_slayer ٩(●̮̃•)۶ jacked in to the ICE on, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 9:27, Reply)
This is a normal post I do like a bit of Scarfolk

(I helped save b3ta! - D - SharkTrousers, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 9:54, Reply)
This is a normal post I grew up near places with names that sounded like that
and even I had to check it was not a real place. It is very well done, I can totally imagine people from places like Lincolnshire doing that sort of thing.
 (I helped save b3ta! My Name was saying these words inside your head on, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 11:16, Reply)
This is a normal post I live near Yseifiog.
Still not sure it's real.
 (I helped save b3ta! FeralCatMan Long ads need comments sections, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 16:45, Reply)
This is a normal post Sounds like the location of an H.P Lovecraft novella.
I'm guessing it looks a bit like one too...
 (Huw Edwards Digital ID is fine, shut up, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 16:53, Reply)
This is a normal post It's a pretty Welsh village, all stone buildings.

(I helped save b3ta! FeralCatMan Long ads need comments sections, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 17:42, Reply)
This is a normal post And wall to wall male voice combat choirs with full military spec vocal chords

(I helped save b3ta! fluffybunnykiller Is feasting on the clitoris of life, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 18:16, Reply)
This is a normal post Is the the font from the Prisoner too?
With added dots over the i's anyway.
 (I helped save b3ta! jonbob loves you, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 21:21, Reply)
This is a normal post Thx for that.... excellent site.

(Master_Slob UK minister for cultural appropriation., Tue 26 Dec 2017, 19:19, Reply)
This is a link post Souped-up seasonal sweary prize puzzle I made this!

▕▕▊▕▊▕▊ CRUDE CRYPTIC X:
▕▊▕▊▕▊▕ BIG HARD XMAS
▕▕▊▕▊▕▊ BASTARD
▕▊▕▊▕▊▕
▕▕▊▕▊▕▊ WIN A FILTHY THREESOME!


The first correct solution to this jumbo Christmas puzzle pulled from the hat on 26th January 2018 will find an unusually engorged package heading for their letterbox - a trio of tomes tackling the topic of lewd language from, variously, a visceral, literate and scientific perspective:

1. "Roger's Profanisaurus - The Magna Farta" by Viz
2. "Language! 500 Years of the Vulgar Tongue" by Jonathon Green
3. "What the F - What Swearing Reveals About Our Language, Our Brains and Ourselves" by Benjamin Bergen

So, while the sprouts are repeating on you on Christmas Day, why not adjourn to the shitter and get stuck in.

Link above fetches landscape A3 JPG. You can also download in the following formats:

PDF (2-pages A4 portrait): https://drive.google.com/open?id=1Atz8hp24ALVtQQr7uIEkbRPgiDtOHAdz
PUZ (Across Lite interactive format): https://drive.google.com/open?id=14xBuept7sGlwhfc_1ly9B69S7rD8q0ky

Closing date is 26 Jan. Submission instructions are on the JPG/PDF.

Enjoy. And don't forget there's still a day to get your entries in for number 9 - see www.b3ta.com/links/1470337.
 (merkinhead poos sideways, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 9:15, Reply)
This is a normal post \o/
That ought to keep me out of trouble. At least until my better half catches me struggling with your massive head-fucker anyway.
 (I helped save b3ta! wheresthefish Partly filled with wrong, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 14:38, Reply)
This is a normal post Thank you and Happy Christmas to you
Even though I never managed to complete them after the first one.
 (I helped save b3ta! Thrill_My_Chinchilla is old and unimproved, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 19:18, Reply)
This is a normal post Yay!
Keep 'em coming. Fnarr.
 (m.auron, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 20:33, Reply)
This is a normal post
Enjoy! And 1,4,9 across!
 (merkinhead poos sideways, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 23:58, Reply)
This is a normal post thanks merkinhead, and merry wotnot.

(I helped save b3ta! ozof, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 11:11, Reply)
This is a normal post Thanks!

(I helped save b3ta! An Egg ,D, Sun 7 Jan 2018, 16:46, Reply)
This is a link post Blue passports to return following Brexit
Fuck’s sake.
 (I helped save b3ta! wheresthefish Partly filled with wrong, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 7:36, Reply)
This is a normal post
To be honest, and I'm a predatory Europhile, I'm in favour of this.
 (MC Chicken Sandwich All I want for Christmas is your mum, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 8:15, Reply)
This is a normal post Warum? Why's that then?

(I helped save b3ta! JamTallons, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 8:29, Reply)
This is a normal post slow news day

(I helped save b3ta! sock more tea vicar?, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 8:19, Reply)
This is a normal post YURRRRS

(benito vaselini no not that one, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 8:20, Reply)
This is a normal post Who gives a shit?
Apart from Farage, obviously.
 (I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 8:31, Reply)
This is a normal post Millions of thickos

(benito vaselini no not that one, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 8:37, Reply)
This is a normal post thickos for me

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 8:43, Reply)
This is a normal post Millions of thickos

(I helped save b3ta! parsons* *restrictions apply, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 10:28, Reply)
This is a normal post thickos for free

(horrid, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 10:30, Reply)
This is a normal post thickos come in other thickos

(eViLegion Chief Commissioner of the Scottish Lunacy Board, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 14:15, Reply)
This is a normal post Resulting in even more thickos
Unless they are gay. I applaud gay thickos for taking one for the team.
 (smellysamlyingcable Seaman on, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 8:04, Reply)
This is a normal post Totally worth it

(I helped save b3ta! TownsendsPublisher is all gravy baby, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 8:43, Reply)
This is a normal post But blue doesn't go with my eyes?

(I helped save b3ta! Fadgebadger Sweaty sumo wanks for everyone!, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 8:50, Reply)
This is a normal post It's alright, you can probably get something customised, leave out the pages you don't want etc

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 8:52, Reply)
This is a normal post Just click it.

(I helped save b3ta! Mudface The web isn't callipygian, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 9:06, Reply)
This is a normal post Somebody pass Fadge a box of Crayolas

(I helped save b3ta! fluffybunnykiller Is feasting on the clitoris of life, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 20:55, Reply)
This is a normal post As with with things pro brexit this blue passport thing it's actually bollocks
Passport size and design is fixed by the ICAO (int civil aviation auth) which has nothing to do with the EU.
EU member states aren't obliged to have burgundy passports. EU member Croatia has a blue one, just like North Korea

 (I helped save b3ta! buffet_the_appetite_slayer ٩(●̮̃•)۶ jacked in to the ICE on, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 8:54, Reply)
This is a normal post I'm looking forward to 'it's the wrong shade of blue'
'my name isn't written on the front in biro'
'The queen looks 30 years older on these ones'
 (benito vaselini no not that one, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 9:41, Reply)
This is a normal post As said below this is not an issue for me but I am seeing this repeated time and again.
There are eu rules for passport design.

ANNEX I CHARACTERISTICS OF THE UNIFORM PASSPORT
"B. Passport cover (a) Colour : burgundy red.
"
 (I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 10:03, Reply)
This is a normal post Perhaps concentrate on the enormous privileges the document bestows rather than what it looks like
Think about just how lucky we are. Or were
 (benito vaselini no not that one, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 10:11, Reply)
This is a normal post Yes Benny. After Brexit we won't be allowed to travel abroad. Without the EU the sky will fall on our heads.

(I helped save b3ta! Prufrock Lucifer, son of the morning!, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 13:01, Reply)
This is a normal post
not to mention the visa cost, it'll ruin travel and tourism like it did when America introduced it....
 (midnightrambler, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 17:13, Reply)
This is a normal post Nothing to prevent the UK government having a blue variant at all - They chose not to.
I imagine that was a cost saving measure.
D. If necessary in particular cases, Member States may, without prejudice to the passport to be drawn up in accordance with this resolution, continue to issue the old type of passport.

Here are other member states passports for example:


It seems rather important to some utter fucktards but I can't really see why.
 (I helped save b3ta! DinivanX Has stinging piss after drinking Pact Coffee, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 10:21, Reply)
This is a normal post *squints*
When you chose that small image were you aware that they are old versions of the passport covers?

They look like this now


My question to you now is.
Were you intentionally trying to deceive or just being thick?

I mean when you googled "eu passport" how on earth did you manage to avoid every other fucking image including the one i've posted here and choose the one you posted?
 (I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 10:48, Reply)
This is a normal post
I thought this wasn't an issue for you? :)
 (I helped save b3ta! DinivanX Has stinging piss after drinking Pact Coffee, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 10:53, Reply)
This is a normal post Best you Got?
Hah!
 (I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 10:55, Reply)
This is a normal post
Nope, this was, which you've ignored as usual:

D. If necessary in particular cases, Member States may, without prejudice to the passport to be drawn up in accordance with this resolution, continue to issue the old type of passport.

Pretty cut and dried no? The UK government chose not to.
 (I helped save b3ta! DinivanX Has stinging piss after drinking Pact Coffee, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 11:03, Reply)
This is a normal post I thought it best to first deal with your massive pictorial lie first which you've chosen not to address.
Yes looks like they could if they really really wanted to "continue to issue the old type of passport."

Right up until they were required to switch to bio-metric.

This is where you go "aha! So you're against bio-metric passports?" you tedious cunt.
 (I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 11:44, Reply)
This is a normal post You've set up a straw man and you've knocked it right over. Clever you.
However why would anyone care about biometric passports? Anything to get through customs quicker sounds good to me.
 (I helped save b3ta! DinivanX Has stinging piss after drinking Pact Coffee, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 11:48, Reply)
This is a normal post Nah, done with this one.

(I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 11:59, Reply)
This is a normal post
You bought up biometrics, I was just wondering why, however if you want to do your usual thing of not explaining yourself, cool.
 (I helped save b3ta! DinivanX Has stinging piss after drinking Pact Coffee, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 12:43, Reply)
This is a normal post Of course, complaining about old versions of the passport
when the regs you posted are from 1981 and stipulate the use of the words "European Community" is rich in irony.
 (I helped save b3ta! Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 12:17, Reply)
This is a normal post
Hahha, brilliant I didn't even notice that.
 (I helped save b3ta! DinivanX Has stinging piss after drinking Pact Coffee, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 12:43, Reply)
This is a normal post Knocks on Door, Hello sir can we talk to you about this large collection of passports that you seem to have

(I helped save b3ta! fluffybunnykiller Is feasting on the clitoris of life, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 20:58, Reply)
This is a normal post thanks for that - particularly this bit at the end:
"D. If necessary in particular cases, Member States may, without prejudice to the passport to be drawn up in accordance with this resolution, continue to issue the old type of passport."
 (I helped save b3ta! buffet_the_appetite_slayer ٩(●̮̃•)۶ jacked in to the ICE on, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 15:43, Reply)
This is a normal post how do we manage to survive under this tyranny?

(benito vaselini no not that one, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 16:26, Reply)
This is a normal post Shocking - anonymous un-elected officials telling us what to do!!!!
...er...well then suggesting that could do if we want to
 (I helped save b3ta! buffet_the_appetite_slayer ٩(●̮̃•)۶ jacked in to the ICE on, Sun 24 Dec 2017, 9:57, Reply)
This is a normal post At fucking last

(I helped save b3ta! evil_andy Stick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 9:04, Reply)
This is a normal post Is there a pink option?

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 9:12, Reply)
This is a normal post Sounds good
I would like a rainbow one..i'm not gay, i just like rainbows.
I don't think that Russia would allow them though.
 (Sherbs, Sun 24 Dec 2017, 2:53, Reply)
This is a normal post I've not been this outraged since Boaty McBoatface.

(I helped save b3ta! Prufrock Lucifer, son of the morning!, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 9:18, Reply)
This is a normal post Meh, never been a big deal for me and just gives those that oppose brexit something to attack.

(I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 9:42, Reply)
This is a normal post Quite right
Let's get back to talking about bendy bananas. Or how frightening it is to see polish food in tescos
 (benito vaselini no not that one, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 10:00, Reply)
This is a normal post
What about a united states of europe? *shivers with terror*
 (I helped save b3ta! DinivanX Has stinging piss after drinking Pact Coffee, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 10:26, Reply)
This is a normal post Don't forget
Bhutanese passport
 (MC Chicken Sandwich All I want for Christmas is your mum, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 11:49, Reply)
This is a normal post Your Brexit straw men NEVER get tired.

(I helped save b3ta! Prufrock Lucifer, son of the morning!, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 13:13, Reply)
This is a normal post you thought blue passports were a straw man a fortnight ago
b3ta.com/links/1469989
 (benito vaselini no not that one, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 14:26, Reply)
This is a normal post Are you seriously upset that they are changing from burgundy to blue? What difference does it make?
No difference at all. Straw man.
 (I helped save b3ta! Prufrock Lucifer, son of the morning!, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 15:25, Reply)
This is a normal post Both sides of this argument look pretty fucking foolish.
Those amongst the brexiters who are championing this blue passport, just look like totally shallow gloating idiots. Those amongst the remainers who do anything more than simply shrug in response to this, just look like they haven't got any good arguments so they've picked this battleground.

The fact is it makes no fucking difference if it's blue, burgundy, or dayglo orange.

If you're pleased about the blue passport, then you probably shouldn't have a vote because you're vapid and driven by malice and irrationality.

If you're displeased about the blue passport, then you ALSO shouldn't have a vote because you're unnecessarily angered by a triviality.
 (eViLegion Chief Commissioner of the Scottish Lunacy Board, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 17:10, Reply)
This is a normal post it's not trivial though is it love
People voted to bin our rights and living standards because of this sort of shite.
 (benito vaselini no not that one, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 17:22, Reply)
This is a normal post How about if you’re displeased by the concentration on trivia that it represents?

(I helped save b3ta! wheresthefish Partly filled with wrong, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 17:22, Reply)
This is a normal post I want a dayglo orange one
How can I get a dayglo orange one?
 (I helped save b3ta! LP, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 11:37, Reply)
This is a normal post
You're a very strange man, Benny. It appears that your horizons are incredibly limited, and that the only way you're able to cope with viewpoints different from your own is by attributing them to ignorance and malice.

Some might call that projection. A kinder explanation would be that you are the victim of technology and social media bubble-thinking.
 (I helped save b3ta! Mr Mann I love pigs, best of all the animals, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 17:01, Reply)
This is a normal post well I dont think that's very fair
For instance, I think a lot of your ideas can be attributed to a traumatic childhood and difficult relationship with your mother. As well as simple, boneheaded ignorance and malice
 (benito vaselini no not that one, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 17:14, Reply)
This is a normal post Lead toys back next please

(I helped save b3ta! monkeon schmonkeon, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 11:51, Reply)
This is a normal post Made with Cornish lead of course

(benito vaselini no not that one, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 12:18, Reply)
This is a normal post Actually, how about lead passports?
Get south crofty back open immediately
 (benito vaselini no not that one, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 12:38, Reply)
This is a normal post We wrote the EU's Toy Safety Directive for them
So that we wouldn't kill our kids with unsafe European imports.
Cheap Italian, Greek, Spanish and Portuguese toys were scary as fuck back in the 80s.
#ToySafetyHistoryBlog
 (I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 10:10, Reply)
This is a normal post Was it BSI that wrote the EN71 standards?

(I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 13:50, Reply)
This is a normal post And so, as Tiny Tim said, "A Merry Brexmas to us all; God bless us, every one!"
Author: Charles Dickens
 (I helped save b3ta! artifus is doing it all wrong, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 17:09, Reply)
This is a normal post The important thing is not that it's blue
It's that it won't say "European Union" on it. Above the name of the fucking country.
 (I helped save b3ta! After you my dear Alfonse No. After you., Fri 22 Dec 2017, 17:32, Reply)
This is a normal post why is that important?

(benito vaselini no not that one, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 17:37, Reply)
This is a normal post Because we're leaving the European Union.
It's been in the news a bit. The order indicated subjugation.
 (I helped save b3ta! After you my dear Alfonse No. After you., Fri 22 Dec 2017, 17:54, Reply)
This is a normal post it indicates to officious border guards the world over that the bearer goes in the quicker queue
If you want anything more from a passport than that, you're overthinking it
 (benito vaselini no not that one, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 19:13, Reply)
This is a normal post Be honest.
Your primary intention for voting remain was saving half an hour a year during your two fucking weeks in Biarritz.
 (I helped save b3ta! After you my dear Alfonse No. After you., Fri 22 Dec 2017, 19:45, Reply)
This is a normal post that would be a more logical course of action than voting leave to change the graphic design of a document that spends 99% of its life in a drawer at home

(benito vaselini no not that one, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 19:54, Reply)
This is a normal post Yes, that would be more logical.
Though not more logical than any argument I've actually made.
 (I helped save b3ta! After you my dear Alfonse No. After you., Fri 22 Dec 2017, 20:03, Reply)
This is a normal post You want to remove some words from a travel document because you feel subjugated
It's all in your head mate
 (benito vaselini no not that one, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 20:06, Reply)
This is a normal post I wanted to leave the European Union.
17m friends did too, so that's what happening. The passport will inevitably reflect it. The passport was a primary issue for literally no-one, but you're upset about it because it will have immediate consequences for your fucking skiing in Val d'Isere.

I don't give a fuck about your skiing in Val d'Isere.
 (I helped save b3ta! After you my dear Alfonse No. After you., Fri 22 Dec 2017, 20:23, Reply)
This is a normal post Let's hope your feelings of inferiority start to subside when you get hold of your shiny new booklet mate
Important
 (benito vaselini no not that one, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 21:09, Reply)
This is a normal post What inferiority?
Do you think I'm working class? Do you think the working class are inferior? Looks like you're revealing yourself now.
 (I helped save b3ta! After you my dear Alfonse No. After you., Fri 22 Dec 2017, 21:15, Reply)
This is a normal post You shouldn't feel subjugated because of the order of the words on your passport
You should feel inferior because you're willing to see your own rights and living standards curtailed to change those words
 (benito vaselini no not that one, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 21:29, Reply)
This is a normal post That's an inept attempt to cover your tracks
You think I should feel inferior because I don't go skiing. Your contempt for the working man knows no bounds. You'll vote Corbyn because at the core of your being where conviction should be, there's just a weather vane and hypocrisy.

You should be shocked at what you've become. And for what? For an organisation that crushes the Catalonians, whose southern states are in tatters, whose contempt for democracy - equal to yours - is such that it makes countries vote and vote again until it gets the result it wants. And now that we're leaving it, your goal - your active hope - is that the working classes will starve in the streets, as punishment for what they've done.

Even if none of the facts were at hand, I would need only benito vaselini to know which side I was on. Because whatever you're for, I'm against.
 (I helped save b3ta! After you my dear Alfonse No. After you., Sat 23 Dec 2017, 8:17, Reply)
This is a normal post The government have focussed on it being blue.
It's iconic, apparently.
 (I helped save b3ta! monkeon schmonkeon, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 22:10, Reply)
This is a normal post Will you lot start colonising brown countries again?
That is far more iconic of the UK that whatever Pantone is chosen for a document.
 (smellysamlyingcable Seaman on, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 12:48, Reply)
This is a normal post
"There is no EU legislation dictating passport colour. The UK could have had any passport colour it wanted and stay in the EU."

https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2017/dec/23/eu-guy-verhofstadt-dismisses-mays-claim-blue-passports-are-sovereignty-statement


 (MC Chicken Sandwich All I want for Christmas is your mum, Sat 23 Dec 2017, 16:53, Reply)
This is a normal post quite nice
i liked it
 (L E T S G O "Stop buying into and spreading this shit", Fri 22 Dec 2017, 9:23, Reply)
This is a normal post Sums up the rest of the channel
Comfortable light comedy.
 (I helped save b3ta! wakeupandsmellthebacon, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 14:59, Reply)
This is a normal post So airy and light a quality that it is but a shadow's shadow

(SockCooker ПТН ПНХ, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 15:02, Reply)
This is a normal post The Aero of YouTube sketch channels

(I helped save b3ta! wakeupandsmellthebacon, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 17:11, Reply)
This is a normal post Shakespeare loved his aero
"Just put your fingers and thumb over the holes and blow into it, and it’ll produce the most moving music." - Hamlet.

<Abusing Shakey quotes, since 2017.>
 (SockCooker ПТН ПНХ, Fri 22 Dec 2017, 19:06, Reply)

« Older links | Newer links »