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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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So, Battered is going down the pan.
Why should Battered kill himself?

Alt: Give Battered a reason for living

Altalt: TV has hit a new low in a lifetime of lows, with new series 'Utopia' starting tonight. As I understand it, the premise for the programme is that a mythical graphic novel is behind some crazy goings-on. Can you actually believe someone commissioned such a whopping heap of shit? I can, because TV execs are cunts, as are the viewing public. As is you and all you hold dear. Just fuck off.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:11, 333 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
I am in a particularly bad mood this morning.
Fucking Poland, fucking freezing, fucking employees not doing what they're fucking told, fucking stupid language I don't understand, fucking shit hotel food, fucking snow, fucking cunt fuck fuck.
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:13, Reply)
Do you carry enough of your medication to end it all?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:16, Reply)
Unfortunately not.

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:17, Reply)
The list of stuff you take looks as though it could provide a nice floaty, sleepy death.

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:21, Reply)
Easy mate, you don't want to choke on a sock

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:16, Reply)
Hey ho
It's off to work he goes
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:19, Reply)

s c
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:44, Reply)
I was soooo looking forward to plugging my tv into the internet last night so i could choose what to watch
but it turns out an ADSL wire is different to an ethernet wire. WHO KNEW!
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:17, Reply)
Erm....
everyone
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:19, Reply)
THEY LOOK THE SAME

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:19, Reply)
Racist.

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:22, Reply)
Yeah, those grey fuckers, coming over here not linking our wall portals* to our routers
*this may not be the correct term, but I don't know what it's called so fuck off yeah?
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:25, Reply)
They don't look the same
One's twice as big and has double the number of connectors.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:34, Reply)
at first glance they do, they look like grey wires with "telephone ends" on
why don't these cunts just use the same wire for both eh?
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:41, Reply)
So normal people can easily tell them apart
Plus one has twisted wires to cut down in interference and the other doesn't, etc.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:52, Reply)
NO TECH-SPEC CHAT

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:20, Reply)


(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:21, Reply)
A shoe in for the best pic on here

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:21, Reply)
Oh v good
I 'sea' what you did there.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:23, Reply)
Alt: Nope, I've got no suggestions.

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:21, Reply)
I've just started watching Breaking Bad
It is about crystal meth dealing and seems very good
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:21, Reply)
My brother said the first few are OK then it becomes tedious and depressing.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:23, Reply)
I'm only on episode 2

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:24, Reply)
Hits of crystal meth or the TV programme?

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:25, Reply)
I thought I'd get the full experience and do both

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:26, Reply)
What could possibly go wrong

(I helped save b3ta! Locus213 Slightly to the left of Bakunin, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 12:49, Reply)
Your brother is wrong
HTH
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:26, Reply)
In fairness he also once told me 'Bad Santa' was 'hilarious'.
He also likes 'Rammstein'.

I think his taste might not be exactly infallible.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:28, Reply)
AltAlt: On a related topic, when did anyone last watch ANYTHING AT ALL on ITV?
It is complete and utter shit. The only thing I can remember watching in the last 12 months would have been the occasional Champions League match if it wasn't on Sky.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:25, Reply)
Mrs Ape liked Dowton Abbey, which was Eastenders in a frock
aside from that, no
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:26, Reply)
A is for Acid
was on ITV over Christmas, about John George Haigh. It was quite good. Everything else is shit.
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:26, Reply)
I saw that first time around, with Martin Clunes?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:28, Reply)
Yep.

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:28, Reply)
Yeah but they never made a sequel

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:31, Reply)
B is for Brown?
C is for Charlie.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:31, Reply)
B is for bromide
You could do the whole periodic table
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:36, Reply)
If only Bromide was an element.

(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:39, Reply)
Or acid, for that matter.
at least Bromide has the deceny to be closer.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:40, Reply)
I will back away from the chemistry
with hands held aloft.
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:42, Reply)
Was it a science program, then?

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:42, Reply)
No I am merely saying that I have very little understanding
of chemistry
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:46, Reply)
I know, dear chap
I meant - was "A is for Acid" about science and stuff? cos I genuinely assumed it would have been about drugs.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:48, Reply)
Ahhhh
No it was refering to murder chap who disolved his victims in acid... rather than 60's beatniks daddio
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:51, Reply)
Professor Jim Alkalili does good science programs on BBC four if we are talking telly

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:44, Reply)
I watched one of those and thought
'I prefer it when he does his LOLarious Iranian standup'
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:48, Reply)
hahahaha

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:51, Reply)
I assumed it was about drugs. Hence my post.

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:39, Reply)
I watched Boon in about 1990.
Hope this helps.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:27, Reply)
I once watched 'Dangermouse'.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:28, Reply)
I once had a 'Dangerwank'
In front of your mum's gf.
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:29, Reply)
I once had a danger shit, into your mum's cunt

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:31, Reply)
That, and FA cup games
except a) I have to use some weird ITV audio description channel because STV is both ITV and Scottish, so doubly arse and b) you have to listen to Andy Fucking Townsend "punditing" which is enough to make me shoot my own ears off.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:31, Reply)
badger... so if my dad, 2 days post surgery, is super-fit so was doing really well but this morning has a lot of pain, a v swollen leg and suspected dvt
should i be mildly concerned, worrying, or panicking my arse off??
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:32, Reply)
who suspects DVT - him or his doctor?
and what was the surgery?
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:34, Reply)
knee replacement
and the doctor - he's still in hospital. they couldn't control the pain last night and this morning the dr came round and looked at it and said possibly dvt, come for checks :(
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:35, Reply)
I think as long as you catch DVT it should be fine...

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:36, Reply)
I have often thought
that Deep Vein Thrombosis sounds like the name of a 40's blues singer
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:37, Reply)
How often?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:41, Reply)
3 times in the last 6 months

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:42, Reply)
I'd have said that was sometimes, rather than often.

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:46, Reply)
In the grand scheme of things
and in relation to how often DVT is mentioned I would say often
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:47, Reply)
SOMETIMES

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:04, Reply)
Quick! Check his will.

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:37, Reply)
If he's in hospital and they are aware the risks are very low.
They can break the clot up in a controlled environment while monitoring him all the time. It's not perfectly ideal, obviously, but I really shouldn't worry.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:38, Reply)
Listen the guy's ill, no need to call him a clot. FFS how rude are you?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:43, Reply)
clot is an excellent insult

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:45, Reply)
Innit. Up there with 'oaf'

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:47, Reply)
my grandad used to call people "clarteard"
it took me years to work out that he meant "cloth-eared".
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:50, Reply)
was he from NI?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:51, Reply)
halifax
or hafilax, as he used to hilariously call it
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:54, Reply)
phew
thank you.

after al wished him dead yesterday, i'd hate al to be right about anything.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:44, Reply)
also, there's still a good chance it isn't DVT
pain management and swelling after major procedures is a fucking lottery. Even on tramadol and nerve blockers I was nearly in tears for about 24 hours after they plated my arm up.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:47, Reply)
gay

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:48, Reply)
what a crybaby prick

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:57, Reply)
that's indisputable
but what gay has to do with low pain tolerance I have no idea. I mean, surely taking a large cock in your bot bot on a regular basis has to at least smart a little bit?
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:00, Reply)
why does it have to be a large cock eh
do you hate the small penised community so much
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:01, Reply)
It's not that I hate them. I just can't relate to them on a personal level, you understand?

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:03, Reply)
i think he's such a bloody macho man that he's been overdoing it
look, i can walk already, and i was only under the knife an hour ago, all those other poor suckers on their zimmer frames...

MEN.

that includes you...
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:49, Reply)
I knew the closure of NHS direct woul;d lead to this sort of thing

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:35, Reply)
i'm hoping it will lead to psychodull getting a new job somewhere that bans b3ta
no more disappearing threads
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:35, Reply)
Probably Foyles War
Everything else is wank.
(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:35, Reply)
They are making a new series of that.

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:40, Reply)
Good.
I like Michael Kitchen
(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:40, Reply)
3 episodes. Foyle no longer a policeman but working for M15 investigating government corruption.

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:45, Reply)
Sounds idiotic.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:19, Reply)
So does your face.

(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:21, Reply)
yeah, like anyone investigates government corruption

(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:30, Reply)
Alt Alt I don't own a TV
Haven't had one for over a year, mainly because it's mostly shit. I watch the (very) few programmes I like via the internet.
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:31, Reply)
Terrible licence fee avoider.

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:32, Reply)

licence fee avoider rape suicide loller
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:33, Reply)
yeah, but stealing TV is worse.

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:34, Reply)
it's not stealing it's copyright infringement zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:35, Reply)
Actually failing to pay a licence fee is probably fraud zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:39, Reply)
I just got one of those internet streaming box things
and there is fuck all on ITV Player or the channel 5 one worth watching.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:39, Reply)
because all he has to look forward to is getting greyer and more wrinkled and ultimately shitting himself in a wheelchair
alt: he has been lucky enough to meet me

altalt: where shall we fuck off to, o master?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:31, Reply)
+un

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:37, Reply)
Battered would be going down the pan
But he has managed to grab onto a toilet duck rim block
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:35, Reply)
Morning Boyce.
Poor cunts in Poland already, can we not give him a little slack, it is, after all, the second shittest country.

Altalt: I've seen the advert for that show, and it looks a bit wank, but I've heard very good things from my mate "in the business," so you never know.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:43, Reply)
what's the first worst? Is it Scotland? It's Scotland isn't it?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:45, Reply)
Wakkistan.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:46, Reply)
Hungary.

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:47, Reply)
Romania is fucking frightful too.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:52, Reply)
Positively Dickensian. Awful place. I have seen gangs of barefoot street urchins in Bucharest.

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:00, Reply)
coming soon to a part of london near you

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:01, Reply)
Near you maybe.

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:02, Reply)
the embassy is about 5 mins from my flat

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:03, Reply)
I bet that increases your house insurance.

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:04, Reply)
what's the shittest?
i've got to say that chad looks pretty shit, at least according to "lonely planet".
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:45, Reply)
Luxembourg. or Chad.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:45, Reply)
Chad is positively lovely compared to east London.

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:46, Reply)
I dunno I fucking hate that song about being a Rockstar

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:50, Reply)
LOL

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:52, Reply)
It's certainly no 'Kilburn High Road' is it?
We in the East End can only dream of the glamour that is 'watching a red-faced Paddy wet himself outside the bookies at 9am'.

Maybe one day....maybe.

*dreams the dream*
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:00, Reply)
You know very well I hate living in London.
Just need to secure the right permanent job and then we're moving. Mrs B has finally agreed.

No way do I want to bring my daughter up in London.
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:02, Reply)

www.lonelyplanet.com/chad
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:55, Reply)


(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:03, Reply)
textbook.

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:04, Reply)
LOL

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:07, Reply)
alright, my little sunbeam x

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:45, Reply)
u r my lite and lyfe. xoxoxo

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:48, Reply)
Thanks for the support WP xx

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:45, Reply)
Don't lose it and kill a hooker though,
I know it seems like a good idea, but it's not.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:48, Reply)
I don't have the energy, even if I had the inclination.

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:50, Reply)

inclination reach
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:51, Reply)
Altalt: I think in this instance I do know.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:46, Reply)
yeah, probably.
To be fair, my mate in the business is actually a guy that drinks in the pub and is currently shooting a comedy based around a female rugby team. So far, from what he's let me see of the script, it's mostly pretty offensive to lesbians.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:50, Reply)
Charming.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 9:56, Reply)
will it be on channel 4
will it have tits... or maybe a cheeky bottom...

If the answer is yes those there munchers dan le rug will love it
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:00, Reply)
I don't know bonzo me old mate,
But I do know that I will not be watching it.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:02, Reply)
Sounds like it is destined for BBC3

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:04, Reply)
Oh gosh I've just been told about this:
www.evento.seatonbay.com/events/view/united-kingdom/seaton/the-gateway-1/hawkeaster-weekend-at-the-gateway

H4WKW1NDB4$H!!!!!!!! LET'S ALL GO!!!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:05, Reply)
Giving away your age right here, grandad

(I helped save b3ta! Frisbee OG wanker, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:06, Reply)
40 this year - YESSSSS!!!!!!!!!

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:08, Reply)
Jesus Christ

(I helped save b3ta! Frisbee OG wanker, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:08, Reply)
No, he just looks like him

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:09, Reply)
:o(

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:17, Reply)
we could be brothers, it's true

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:38, Reply)
I cannot decide what sort of gathering to have in June for my 40th. Small dinner with a select few, a massive piss up with a lot of people, or possibly both over the same weekend.

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:10, Reply)
Both is a good idea

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:11, Reply)
I think I'll probably go with a small dinner at a decent restaurant, probably 8-10 people.

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:12, Reply)
I may just pretend mine's not happening at all.
Or go to my mother's for lunch or something.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:14, Reply)
I have also considered going to your mum's for my 40th.

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:25, Reply)
Your 40th is free
as long as you get the card stamped for each visit
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:27, Reply)
She's got quite a high step at her front door so bring climbing gear if you do.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:28, Reply)
It's not been a problem on my previous visits.

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:29, Reply)
Do you go in the back door?

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:30, Reply)
Always.

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:37, Reply)
Are you going to be dressing up as a psychedelic easter bunny on the Sunday then?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:15, Reply)
Of course.
As I do every Sunday.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:21, Reply)
I don't know who this Battered character is so I cannot comment either way
I can however confirm that life is far too beautiful to end it all etc
(I helped save b3ta! Frisbee OG wanker, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:06, Reply)
Shut up you drunken cunt.

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:09, Reply)
Don't know who you are, soz :(

(I helped save b3ta! Frisbee OG wanker, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:11, Reply)
I thought about you yesterday.
A young lad in a tough mudder shirt tried to punch me.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:27, Reply)
Look at the sanctamonius cunt with her jewelery
www.guardian.co.uk/law/2013/jan/15/ba-rights-cross-european-court

Also, Jodie Fosters face looks really weird.

AM I RITE!????
(Bazongaloid, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:12, Reply)
Jodie Foster - botox

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:13, Reply)
Bollocks more like

(Bazongaloid, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:14, Reply)
less like, so it would seem

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:18, Reply)
I think she should be prepared to be martyred for her cause.

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:24, Reply)

FUCKING CUNTS ARE PLAYING FUCKING DIDO IN THE OFFICE.

Does anyone have a gun I can borrow?
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:13, Reply)
Yes.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:16, Reply)
Please courier it to me straight away.
Send to:

Angry short English bloke
Poznan.

Thanks
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:21, Reply)
Are you running some sort of scheme out there?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:25, Reply)
Playing Dido!
Well whaddya expect in a country that ADVERTISES the fact that Shakin' Stevens is playing there! Dido's positively avant garde in comparison
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:28, Reply)
Shakin' Stevens is alright.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:29, Reply)
I can't wait for the concert. Even if I don't need to be here for work I will find a reason to be.

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:39, Reply)
Good thinking.
We nearly lost him to a heart attack a few years ago - every gig Shaky manages is a blessing.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:50, Reply)
I bet your teas gone cold too

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:18, Reply)
Battered I don't know who you are but you sound like a whiner.
Why don't you grow a pair and speak to them like grown-ups, instead of pissing and moaning like a 14 year-old who wasn't taken to the prom but her mum said she's beautiful and deserves her own prom?
(I helped save b3ta! Frisbee OG wanker, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:18, Reply)
Did you go to the prom?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:20, Reply)
Screw that, I had my own prom. With Blackjack. And hookers

(I helped save b3ta! Frisbee OG wanker, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:20, Reply)
Your prom consisted of you, a bus shelter, 3L of White Ace and a pair of piss-soaked trousers.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:22, Reply)


(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:24, Reply)
Monty's Lezza Mum.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:25, Reply)
Were they your trousers?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:24, Reply)
I sold them to him for some of the White Ace.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:26, Reply)
Please kill yourself.

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:22, Reply)
Aw sweetheart, don't be upset
Just because you made some questionable life-choices doesn't mean you can't turn that frown upsidedown :)
(I helped save b3ta! Frisbee OG wanker, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:33, Reply)
He's "grumpy" it's in his nature

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:36, Reply)
+ L

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:22, Reply)
AHAHA HAHAHAHA HAHAHAAAHAHAHA hahaha hahaha
hahah ha ha ha...ha.........ha
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:24, Reply)
Oh Lokesy.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:27, Reply)
You should put your hands up, and surrender.

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:26, Reply)
That's better left to Kroney.
His sort have plenty of experience of that.
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:28, Reply)
Because he'll never be able to do this
imgur.com/gallery/9gAdk

Then again, neither will I, or most people for that reason.

Alt: His child.

AltAlt: It's why most of the stuff I watch now is American TV. There's still the same level of shit, but as there are far more shows made, there are some gems. I'm currently thoroughly enjoying Supernatural.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:26, Reply)
I think if you are a nerd then there is loads of TV aimed at you

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:27, Reply)
This is very true.

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:28, Reply)
'Member Cadfael?
Monk detective! They don't make shows like that anymore.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:29, Reply)
if you actually are one however it's all depressingly stupid.

(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:30, Reply)
Cheer up sleeeepy Wilf, oh what can it mean
For a Lithium-crazed cyclist and a globe-trotting queen.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:33, Reply)
cheers Monts
this has cheered me right up.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:52, Reply)
Dear Commissioning Editor of the BBC,
I Wilf Quixiote Fogg demand that the following programs are played on repeat:

- Around the World in 80 Days
- A brief History of Bicycles
- Three men and a moustache
- lithium nights

Many thanking yous
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:35, Reply)
I am seriously considering a name change

(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:53, Reply)
to "Lithium nights"?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:56, Reply)
Wilf Quixiote Fogg
but as I can't reserve my proper name any more....*sadface*
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:28, Reply)
Someone I know is doing the audience research for Utopia.
*taps nose*
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:32, Reply)
EmVee, right?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:33, Reply)
He's asking people which Transformer best fits up their own arse?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:36, Reply)
Colonicotron

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:37, Reply)
Bumblebutt

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:44, Reply)
Optanus Prime

(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:51, Reply)
He shouldn't.
mainly because there would be no one to bore us if he offed himself.

Also. You're a cunt monty.
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:53, Reply)
Oh right. It's like that is it?
I see.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:01, Reply)
I go off sick for one day and this is what's I come back to.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:53, Reply)
Are you okay now?

(Bazongaloid, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:55, Reply)
Fucking public secor workers taking sick days, no wonder this country is going to the dogs
#brokenbritain
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:56, Reply)
Did you decide to apply for that job?

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:56, Reply)
I found the wage it was less than £30k, so I didn't bother.
I'm still looking around though.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:59, Reply)
Do you want me to look at our internal job vacanies? We have loads of analysts and I get paid if I bring someone in

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:14, Reply)
Or ours, there are a few
Client Services Analyst? Requires

Able to manage multiple tasks / priorities / projects
Strong analytical/problem solving skills
Previous client service experience is advantageous
A good knowledge of Microsoft Office especially Excel, Word and Outlook.
A basic understanding of networks and how they work.
A basic knowledge of the derivatives market.
2:2 or higher degree in IT or Finance related subject.
Exposure to a customer service environment of some kind.
A willingness and ability to learn quickly.
A strong and confident personality.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:21, Reply)
2:2 degree?
What kind of slack-jawed prick gets a Desmond?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:23, Reply)
I did
The Drinking Mans Degree.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:24, Reply)
My degree is in psychology, but I'm overqualified for all that.
I mean "can use outlook" ffs
(PsychoChomp, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:23, Reply)
The rest seem to require a background in finance
unless you're a programmer.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:27, Reply)
i work for the finance dept
But I'm mainly an MI analyst with forecasting knowledge
(PsychoChomp, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:32, Reply)
The finance vacancies are for qualified accountants
and the rest mean financial instruments and derivatives when they talk about finance. Soz.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:49, Reply)
Ah well, thanks for looking.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:51, Reply)
Yeah go for it, gaz me any that are above £30k bbz

(PsychoChomp, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:24, Reply)
Hello.

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:59, Reply)
fuck off

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 10:59, Reply)
Not really, have you heard about my latest networking disaster?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:00, Reply)
They should totally make power cables and ethernet cables look identical.

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:01, Reply)
:(
I also bought a male/male aerial wire and I need a male/female aerial wire, WHY IS LIFE SO HARD?
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:03, Reply)
It isn't.
You're just a 'tard.
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:04, Reply)
Make like Mrs Ape and turn it over

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:04, Reply)
what?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:08, Reply)

aerial wire and I need a male/female aerial wire jazz mag
LIFE MY PENIS
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:05, Reply)
Since when did the aerial in on the back of a TV start being female?
I'll tell you, since never. John Logie Baird considered it and thought "HOOTS! ONLY A TOTAL SPASTIC WOULD CONSIDER THAT A BONNY IDEA"

Are you a spastic, Nakers? Are you?
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:05, Reply)
Would you like a hint?

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:08, Reply)
are you offering to come over and set it all up for me?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:11, Reply)
Am I offering to go to your house from the other side of London
and plug the right cables into the right sockets? For free?

No.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:14, Reply)
I'll pay you

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:15, Reply)
You don't have to pay me
you don't need my help at all. Just buy the right cables and plug them in.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:20, Reply)
i tried that :(

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:23, Reply)
What a cheeky cunt eh?

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:15, Reply)
You just need an adaptor, not a new cable.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:07, Reply)
there's always something isn't there
I just want my tv to talk to my digi box thing so i can record
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:08, Reply)
If you haven't got a drawer full of cables and adaptors already you've failed as a man.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:09, Reply)
It's little wonder Mrs Ape looks elsewhere.

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:10, Reply)
i have draws of cables and shit, but never the correct one
i have 6 USB wires with differing mini, midi, maxi usb ends on them and yet, i can never find one to fit my blackberry.
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:11, Reply)
Hideous anus euphemism of the day

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:12, Reply)
Blackberrys use the same D shape mini USB as every other non-Apple smartphone
ffs, the other ones are for external disk drives and stuff.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:14, Reply)
I don't even know where they came from
and also i've had two BBs and they've had different sized usb inputs, so there
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:15, Reply)
I'm pretty sure they haven't
or else you've been sold a Blackberry knockoff
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:26, Reply)
well they have
My boss has an older BB than me and his charger doesn't fit my BB
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:28, Reply)
I'm more of a hammer and nails sort of chap to be honest, i ahve loads of that shit

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:12, Reply)
I bet you're always using the wrong hammer as well

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:15, Reply)
He's always wondering why he's wrecking the head of his mallet
when he's putting up pictures, I bet.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:21, Reply)
Psst: that's a screwdriver m8

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:22, Reply)
DAMMIT

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:24, Reply)
ahhh kronely. my favourite of the depressed and lonely frenchmen.

(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:00, Reply)
How is Geelong on the fire front?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:02, Reply)
I see you've managed to survive another day in the lethal wasteland you call home.

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:02, Reply)
Did you break my C-17, you frog scoffing ponce?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:01, Reply)
Ha ha

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:02, Reply)

?
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:03, Reply)
The Frogs broke one we lent them.
Do you read the fucking news?
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:04, Reply)
Perhaps it wasn't covered in La Monde?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:05, Reply)
Over use of reverse thrust I bet.

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:08, Reply)
Do you read the papers at all?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:05, Reply)
Apparently not.
Sorry about Concorde, by the way. I just heard about that.

Embarrassing.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:06, Reply)
I was looking forwards to watching that, way to ruin monday captain ruiner

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:00, Reply)
Come on Gluey - a 'graphic novel' causing mayhem? Fuck off.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:04, Reply)
I think I'm going to watch it now, just to spite you.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:13, Reply)
Plus, it's Tuesday OR IS THAT THE JOKE?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:11, Reply)
OH, TWO DAYS RUINED WELL DONE

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:24, Reply)
I'm here all week WHAT'S LEFT OF IT

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:25, Reply)
They are now playing Beverley Craven.
At this rate I will need to learn the Polish version of 'Yes it was me officer, but in my defense, I murdered those 22 people as a result of severe musical provocation'.
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:12, Reply)
i liked it when she did Newsround

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:14, Reply)

News Reacha
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:17, Reply)
Yesterday I saw what has to be the worst hour of tv that the BBC has ever shown, something called "Marinda" followed by something called "Mrs's Browns Boys".
I swear man, the commisioner must be getting some serious fanny out of that.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:20, Reply)
There was an excellent doc about the lost civilisations of S America on, very good it was too.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:23, Reply)
Borgen is top quality dutch political drama on bbc4

(PsychoChomp, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:26, Reply)
I watched that, it was very good
but the best bits were hacking at thin air with the machete and the splinter drama
(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:28, Reply)
VENGEANCE ON THORNS WILL BE MIIIIIINE

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:37, Reply)
Yo' dude,
soz I didn't text back, been one thing after another, will do today. SRS PLNZ in the works.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:31, Reply)
no worries bredrin

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:38, Reply)
obvious question is obvious
why did you watch them?

i watched "Looper", it was quite good
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:24, Reply)
Sooper?

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:27, Reply)
DYAAKY

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:29, Reply)
Background telly, was busy but it was on in the background whilst I was working.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:30, Reply)
Miranda Hart is the unfunniest man on television.

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:26, Reply)
hahahahahaha!
POTD
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:27, Reply)
I know where he lives

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:29, Reply)
I donno who that thing was, but you're right, it wasn't comedy.
I do like that other bird who's doing the rounds at the moment, northern lass, forgot her name.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:31, Reply)
Northern Lass?
Doing the rounds?...

There is a punchline in there somewhere
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:33, Reply)
"Swipe"

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:34, Reply)
Sarah Millican?
She's a bit "oh I'm a bit fat and men are a bit rubbish"
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:33, Reply)
Isn't that all female comedians?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:34, Reply)
Her act: 'OOOH AH LOOV EEET'N KEEEEK'

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:39, Reply)
fucking hell
that took me some translating
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:41, Reply)
That's the one, I think she's alright for light enteretainment

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 12:05, Reply)
rachelswipe?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:33, Reply)
Sarah Millican?
Geordie, glasses?
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:33, Reply)
+cunt

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:34, Reply)
Hey! Lokesy's not *that* bad!!

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:39, Reply)
That's lovely. ...*tears up*

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:41, Reply)
Miranda
reminds me of Frankie Howard...
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:27, Reply)
It's the toupee.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:46, Reply)
I dun a noo thred

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 15 Jan 2013, 11:47, Reply)

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