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What are b3tans having for lunch today?
I am having pizza.

If you have already had lunch what did you have?
Otherwise what is the worst topping you could have on a pizza?
(ubiquitous writhing garlic, Wed 27 May 2009, 13:58, archived)
wormulus
can't imagine worse
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Wed 27 May 2009, 13:59, archived)
You had Seb for lunch?
Or he'd be a bad pizza topping?
(I helped save b3ta! in vino veritas, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:01, archived)
Both - I think I shared him with Gumsy

(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:02, archived)
Sexy

(I helped save b3ta! in vino veritas, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:03, archived)
thank you

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:03, archived)
*curtsies*

(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:06, archived)
NOT VERY NEAR THE TOP !!!
On Facebook, scroll to bottom, blue text on the left hand side saying your language, change it to "English (Pirate) beta".

YARRRR, maxmimus rofflez.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:24, archived)
Just done it!
I like the log-out bit.
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:26, archived)
...it's been there for ages Gonz

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:26, archived)
Shush it up big times bumhole mouth !

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:31, archived)
*starts crying*

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:33, archived)
You know the Konami Code works on facebook as well.

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:50, archived)
look what it says when i try and log into my banned b3ta account, lulz
Your account has been suspended:
2009-05-27 mongychops sockpuppet. sadface
(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:27, archived)
Which account was that?

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:27, archived)
i was deleting as i posted as i had major plans afoot for epic good times, but i over used it a bit premature, silly boy
oh well, back to the drawing board
(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:29, archived)
My banning reason is worse :(
s1.b3ta.com/host/creative/39915/1243430993/Hermione.gif
(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:30, archived)
hahaha, oh well, i've learn't my lesson, i won't be making any more accounts
;)
(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:33, archived)
How could the mods BE THIS WRONG!

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:34, archived)
Hermione was the best sex-pest attracting Wormulus based fake account ever

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:36, archived)

mine still works... :D
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:46, archived)
OBJECTION!

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:46, archived)
very much this, bloody favouritism

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:50, archived)
Coz I don't act like a guffbeak with mine :)

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:57, archived)
i done nothing, just one little slip of the banter
:((((
(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:57, archived)
I smell interlies

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:02, archived)
Dude, you're like the worst pizza topping ever

(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:03, archived)
The bits of indoor scarf get between your teeth

(I helped save b3ta! in vino veritas, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:07, archived)
haha

(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:08, archived)
wormulus
He would dribble all over my cheese and kick me in the chin when I went for a nibble on a crust.
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:00, archived)
worst topping, or having him for lunch?

(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:00, archived)
Both

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:01, archived)
both

(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:01, archived)
BOTH

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:02, archived)
BOTH

(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:02, archived)
boat

(PsychoChomp, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:02, archived)
+motor

*bwub bwub bwub bwub bwub bwub bwub bwub bwub bwub*
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:04, archived)
I only learned about the verb 'to motorboat' recently.
Sheltered childhood and all that!
(I helped save b3ta! Anthropos Was making beer on, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:07, archived)
My mum had a hard time breast feeding me

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:12, archived)
Everyone, ready....
Hmphrraphharhhrbwrarhmmph.
(I helped save b3ta! Anthropos Was making beer on, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:14, archived)
Donkey Gums would be a shitty pizza topping
all scaly and hairy like a herpesnis.
(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:03, archived)
Yours would just be a goat's cheese covered sideparting that tastes of a dick that's been used to stir Mike Tyson's daugther

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:06, archived)
Yours would be the pink, shiny interior of Piston's babyoil smoothed anal tract
served on a bed of gummy pubes.
(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:16, archived)
I forgot to add that yours would be balanced on a massive, sprinter's knee like chin

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:23, archived)
yours would be baked in the Mediteranean oven that is your concave chest
You have to puff on an inhaler after every mouthful.
(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:25, archived)
Your pizza would have to be folded in half with you inside it because you're so fucking spasticated that you could make Ray Charles vomit by looking at you
They would even crack an egg onto your head so you would be quiet for a while whilst you jabbed your spoon shaped cock into the yolk, as it felt the same as when you used to dib at your mummy's belly fold when she would hug you tight and then slam dunk you into the waste paper bin when no one was looking at the hospital because you're a disgrace to the bird kingdom.
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:32, archived)
p.s. i love you seb

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:40, archived)
The Doctors were right about you
When your Mother's prehensile cunt that looks like the Predator's mouth spun a cocoon out of milmy fadgesnot it should have been throw into the incinerator.

Her perverted feelings of Motherhood were too strong and after 9 smelly months you hatched from your cheesestring prison like a crippled moth.
You upside down mouth gasping for air as you wicker lungs fucked themselves on human air.
(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:44, archived)
'Cheesestring Prison' & 'Crippled Moth' made me lol :)

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:47, archived)
disgrace to the bird kingdon
made me chuckle

Someone was asking for a link to our most epic cuss battle.
(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:52, archived)
haha
www.b3ta.com/talk/6161841

I had a proper chuckle over some of that.
(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:56, archived)
lol me too :)

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 27 May 2009, 15:09, archived)
Hello new person
You have correctly divined /talk's favourite subject.

I dislike chicken on pizza. It is wrong.
(I helped save b3ta! in vino veritas, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:00, archived)
Not as wrong as pineapple
pineapple pizza eaters are worse than Hitler.
(I helped save b3ta! Cactus 1 doesn't care what you think on, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:02, archived)
you hush your whore mouth

(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:03, archived)
Aargh, I've found a live one !
*fetches the pitchfork*
(I helped save b3ta! Cactus 1 doesn't care what you think on, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:04, archived)
hello Verity
*hugs*
(I helped save b3ta! hooker1uk Filth monger of the lowest degree!, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:15, archived)
hello Verity's dad!
*hugs back*
(I helped save b3ta! in vino veritas, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:20, archived)
i trust you are well

(I helped save b3ta! hooker1uk Filth monger of the lowest degree!, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:22, archived)
Yes thanks, very busy at the moment
Hope you and the family are doing well too?
(I helped save b3ta! in vino veritas, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:23, archived)
ah man, i so wish i hadn't wasted my troll account picking on cr3 :(((

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:00, archived)
Meh.
Meh and meh.

Anchovies.
(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Wed 27 May 2009, 14:00, archived)
They are tasty little fishies
but they're better in caesar salad than on pizza.
(I helped save b3ta! in vino veritas, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:04, archived)
I used to scrape the toppings off of pizzas
and just eat the bases.
(I helped save b3ta! M o D, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:00, archived)
I bet the crust on fish fingers was too hard for your teeth too :)

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:02, archived)
haha

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:03, archived)
I need help with the skin on hot chocolate

(I helped save b3ta! M o D, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:05, archived)

cunt
(I helped save b3ta! Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Wed 27 May 2009, 14:01, archived)
Chicken salad

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:01, archived)
Monkey
Spunk
(1obster twunter.com/I'm bored of it too now, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:02, archived)
Moped

(thediscokingpin, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:06, archived)
Goat anus

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:05, archived)
I has a fried egg sandwich, lovely.
This is truly horrific www.youtube.com/watch?v=XplO9jekbT8&feature=related
(I helped save b3ta! Major Turd for tonight only, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:08, archived)
Good god

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:18, archived)
Marmite.
Imagine it.
Go on, just imagine a Marmite pizza.

Hahahaha, i'll bet you've screwed your face up a little bit.
(thediscokingpin, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:09, archived)
You really did
Lovely pizza by the way... Sweetcorn, Bacon, Pinapple, Red Onions and Mixed Peppers.
(ubiquitous writhing garlic, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:12, archived)
I really did what?

(thediscokingpin, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:24, archived)
Made my face screw up.
Gah!
(ubiquitous writhing garlic, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:33, archived)
maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrmite

(thediscokingpin, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:40, archived)
Oh my
that sounds quite nice. I think I may have to try this out.
(I helped save b3ta! M o D, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:57, archived)
I hope youre joking.

(thediscokingpin, Wed 27 May 2009, 15:06, archived)
Carrying on the wrong crush thread up here:
Heston Blumenthal
Gordon Ramsay
Alain De Botton
Gavin Essler
Sebastein Chabal
Guy Garvey
Charlie Brooker
Bono*

I personally don’t find these wrong crushes but some people do.

*Apart from this one. That IS a wrong crush

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:10, archived)

Chabal
 Winnett
(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:12, archived)
Nothing wrong with fancing Sebastian Winnett the famous artist
he's very attractive.
(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:16, archived)
I hear he has his own wikipedia page
And everything
(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:21, archived)
On no account should anyone vandalize it.

(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:22, archived)
Wikipedia vandalism is really funny and very original.

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:26, archived)
Rob nawty stepped me for it once:(

(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:27, archived)
I'm not surprised
It wasn't even funny when people first starting doing it.
(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:32, archived)
Give me some fucking credit, Michael.

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:17, archived)
He's a prime male!

(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:22, archived)
Parminder Nagra
Julia Stiles
(I helped save b3ta! The Teviot Moose major 5th., Wed 27 May 2009, 14:12, archived)
Neither are wrong crushes,
maybe Parminder if you're a massive racist.
(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 27 May 2009, 14:42, archived)
I wouldn't have said that Gordon Ramsey, or Seabass were either...
but it's all about taste I guess.
(I helped save b3ta! The Teviot Moose major 5th., Wed 27 May 2009, 14:44, archived)
Sebastien Chabal, oh my god yes
Charlie Brooker WOULD get it, as long as he didn't do comedy wanking.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:14, archived)
Shagging Chabal would be a fairly neolithic experience.
I'm sure he is actually a caveman.
(I helped save b3ta! Anthropos Was making beer on, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:15, archived)
He's pretty much my ideal man.
That's how I like them.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:16, archived)
I know....
*daydreams*
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:19, archived)
I bet you daydream about me.
(oh, and where IS that lyric from?)
(I helped save b3ta! The Teviot Moose major 5th., Wed 27 May 2009, 14:22, archived)
Of course I do, Gorgeous.
My sig? It's Ballroom Blitz.
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:27, archived)
and 'hey ladies' samples it

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:32, archived)
*cowbells*

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:37, archived)
Ah, yes, brilliant.
Had been bugging me.
(I helped save b3ta! The Teviot Moose major 5th., Wed 27 May 2009, 14:33, archived)
I bet he does jazz hands when he comes.

(I helped save b3ta! The Teviot Moose major 5th., Wed 27 May 2009, 14:16, archived)
Jizz hands surely?

(I helped save b3ta! Anthropos Was making beer on, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:17, archived)
Hahaha

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:17, archived)
I bet Ramsay's pillow talk would be incredible

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:18, archived)
It'd be filth and food.

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:21, archived)
Isn't that the idea of good pillow talk?

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:24, archived)
'Oh darling, you fucking remind me of a corn on the cunting cob'

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:25, archived)
Maximinimus - 2005 Graduate of the Hollyoaks school of pillow talk.

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:28, archived)
I didn't say it'd be bad, did I?

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:28, archived)
No, I was geniunely asking...

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:29, archived)
He can butter my crumpets any time he likes.
And by 'butter my crumpets' I mean [something about breasts and spunk].
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:36, archived)
I say *monocle*

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:39, archived)
Do you reckon his wife/bit on the side regularly says "Oh Gordon, talk cleanly to me while we do it"

(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:22, archived)
Haha yes!

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:23, archived)
Do you reckon afterwards he would shout:
Sex....
DONE!
(I helped save b3ta! Anthropos Was making beer on, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:28, archived)
I think he would
Before cleaning himself on the curtains
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:34, archived)
Katey Perry
I fancy her lots. But she isn't a wrong crush. It's a right crush.
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:22, archived)
until you realise she's a dead ringer for Roger Taylor in the 'I Want To Break Free' video...

(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:23, archived)
o_O
Thanks for ruining that for me, you RUINER.
(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Wed 27 May 2009, 14:34, archived)
*drum solos*

(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:36, archived)
She's so vacant, though.
Pretty, but there's a lot of space in that head.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:23, archived)
I want to bounce my horrific errection off her forehead and get arrested for assault

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:25, archived)
Nah, too vacant looking for me. Bit lobotomised.

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:26, archived)
She's got lovely pies

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:40, archived)
So does Greggs

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:48, archived)

Heston Blumenthal - GONZO !
Gordon Ramsay - GONZO !
Alain De Botton - GONZO !
Gavin Essler - GONZO !
Sebastein Chabal - GONZO !
Guy Garvey - GONZO !
Charlie Brooker - GONZO !
Bono*
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:23, archived)
TAG FAIL
=(((
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:25, archived)
Tuna and kit kat sandwich

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 27 May 2009, 14:18, archived)
I haven't eaten breakfast yet
Just woke up because I've been up all night with the heat
(I helped save b3ta! Methylene Blue - electrohead, Wed 27 May 2009, 14:59, archived)