Has the crisis passed?

( brb Learn Ukrainian and prepare for a referendum, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 22:21, archived)

Any particular one in mind?

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 20 Nov 2024, 22:38, archived)

I'm referring to the unspeakable horror.

( brb Learn Ukrainian and prepare for a referendum, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 22:48, archived)

Climate change has been defeated
As you were
( Sn0tters 🇯🇴🇧🇧🇮🇪, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 22:44, archived)

You have been busy!

( brb Learn Ukrainian and prepare for a referendum, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 22:49, archived)

Wasnt me
Was the refrigerators
( Sn0tters 🇯🇴🇧🇧🇮🇪, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 23:02, archived)

Buzz will be pleased.

...

( brb Learn Ukrainian and prepare for a referendum, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 23:14, archived)

lovely day. no snow here tho.

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 15:48, archived)

It's pretty shit here.
Unless you're talking about the weather, which is quite nice.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 16:19, archived)

i didn't know you'd moved to Runcorn

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 16:43, archived)

Christ, you just reminded me that Runcorn exists.
Thanks MiseryCunt, my day doesn't seem so bad now in comparison.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 16:47, archived)

Nobody needs to be reminded that runcorn exists

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 20:56, archived)

bumcorn exists too

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 21:14, archived)

Bumcorn is eternal
Due to its structure and indigestibility
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 21:28, archived)

It's so uniquely shit that connoisseurs of shitness called it 'Runicorn'.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 20 Nov 2024, 21:16, archived)

No, Scoob, it's just the caretaker in a mask.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 21:34, archived)

Snowed again last night
But not much
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 16:25, archived)

it's actually against the law for it to snow here, i think

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 16:44, archived)

fucking hell

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 17:00, archived)

why fuck in hell when there are beds in heaven

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 17:20, archived)

Wish the government would hurry up with this assisted dying bill so I can get on with some good old fashioned shipmanning

(2 Can Chunder - Work account arbeit macht frei!, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 17:41, archived)

alrite President Putin

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 17:49, archived)

NANANANANANANANANANANANANANANANA SHIPMAAAAAN!

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 18:20, archived)

POW! INJECT!
FORGE WILL!
(2 Can Chunder - Work account arbeit macht frei!, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 18:25, archived)

Hi gunt's

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 11:57, archived)

High Richard McBeefypants xx

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 20 Nov 2024, 11:58, archived)

Yes

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 12:29, archived)

Hi ho

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 12:05, archived)

innit doe

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 12:41, archived)

Ho white and the 7 postcode gangsters.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 12:51, archived)

A deer?

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 13:01, archived)

A non binary dear?

( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 13:33, archived)

I'm eating a banana
#anecdoatesnotmyforte
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 13:33, archived)

Eeeewww

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 13:37, archived)

They are a bit like penises.
Absolutely filthy. Ban them, I say.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 13:38, archived)

I can't bear them
The smell is enough to make me feel sick
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 13:45, archived)

Yes but what about bananas?

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 14:17, archived)

I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit
It's the only way to be sure
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 14:31, archived)

alright Putin

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 14:34, archived)

Chortle.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 14:44, archived)

‘Sup QR

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 14:17, archived)

Yo bro

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 15:03, archived)

I'm having a busy day stripping,
Calm down you lot, I'm talking about doors! I am stripping paint off doors.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 14:42, archived)

it's beer clock cock tick tock cock clock cock

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 15:16, archived)

I'm getting prepper emails now
1. Use any cash reserves you have in the house to buy food and other supplies. Cash will hold its value until people realize this is no ordinary blackout.

2. Hurry up and fill your bathtub with water. As the pumps stop working there will still be some water left in the pipes that you can take advantage of.

3. Get all your food from the fridge and freezer and salt it, smoke it or can it to make it last longer. You will need it badly.

4. Build THESE No Grid Survival Projects on your property (THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT!)
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 15:55, archived)

5. Teabag a terrapin

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 16:02, archived)

Stock up on M.R.Es

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 16:13, archived)

Instructions unclear
I now own 300 copies of Automatic for the People
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 17:15, archived)

Instructions unclear
I now own 300 copies of The Chronic
( Cheers Cheers, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 17:27, archived)

Who are you getting them from?

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 17:16, archived)

Former poster 'beepeedee'

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 20 Nov 2024, 17:34, archived)

morning
you boring sad thickos
( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 6:44, archived)

it's a bit cold
brrr
( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 6:48, archived)

morning you fat mental spastic

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 20 Nov 2024, 7:09, archived)

morning evening

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 7:11, archived)

Morning
You hideous shit.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 7:36, archived)

Morning
You unrelenting fishmitten
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 7:38, archived)

Morning
You pizzafail
( Cheers Cheers, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 7:49, archived)

Morning
You needy cunt
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Wed 20 Nov 2024, 8:12, archived)

Morning
You shuddering spasm of sclerotic phlegm
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 8:58, archived)

alrite

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 15:34, archived)

What's a wankbaffle?

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 9:28, archived)

Who cares.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 20 Nov 2024, 9:42, archived)

Yeah I suppose

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 9:51, archived)

Baffle, a device used for the purpose of restricting the flow of hydraulic fluid in a high pressure line. It consists of a disc with a small central perforation.
Glossary Terms Plastics (British Standards Institution) ³⁴

My cock is basically a disc with a small central perforation, so I think this clears everything up.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 10:04, archived)

If anything, it raises more questions

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 10:07, archived)

I SAID IT CLEARS EVERYTHING UP

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 10:13, archived)

Understood

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 10:24, archived)

Well colour me wankbaffled

(2 Can Chunder - Work account arbeit macht frei!, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 12:50, archived)

whatever you want it to be, baby

( $$ ✅, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 10:50, archived)

❤️

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 10:55, archived)

Nothing, what's a wankbaffle with you?

(2 Can Chunder - Work account arbeit macht frei!, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 11:15, archived)

I think the real question is 'what *isn't* a wankbaffle?' m8
Ponder on that
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 11:31, archived)

Going to a gig on my own l8r
Went to a DJ gig on my own last night too. What a loos'er eh guy's
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 11:30, archived)

You went to see James Hype, didn't you?

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 20 Nov 2024, 11:51, archived)

Actually it was that Asian looking prick with the cake
You know the one I nean
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 11:57, archived)

Prue Leith?

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 20 Nov 2024, 11:57, archived)

Not for me thanks, I'm driving

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 12:29, archived)

Mourning
No, my face always looks like that.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 11:39, archived)

Alright ocsp you weirdo

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 20 Nov 2024, 11:51, archived)

Alright D.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 12:49, archived)

Status updates, please.
I'm currently felching a finch but it's losing its appeal, so I might jizz on a jay in a bit.
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 19 Nov 2024, 17:38, archived)

i'm buggering a buffalo
in the arse
( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 17:39, archived)

hello
can anyone recommend a really really good audible book or books? i've got six credits, probably had six for ages just found out you can only have six as they apparently expire, so i've basically been paying for nothing since i haven't been using them.
( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 17:53, archived)

Diddling Dingos for Dummies

( broadsword now that's fresh, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 18:18, archived)

thanks

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 18:20, archived)

Any Andrew vachss on audio? Great pulp fiction novels

( mongychops, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 18:20, archived)

yes there <s>are some</s> is one of his
the questioner
veil's vist
two trains running
foreskintaken
another chance to get it right


( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 19:15, archived)

Enjoyed all his books.

( mongychops, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 0:21, archived)

I'm greasing up a gibbon, presently.
I will no doubt chin-dong a chimp, later.
( Invisible Wizard - 10th Level Nerf-herder, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 17:45, archived)

Why the primates?
Makes it easier to pretend it's your mum, etc.
( Invisible Wizard - 10th Level Nerf-herder, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 17:47, archived)

Just off out to gunt-punch a gnu

( Cheers Cheers, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 17:48, archived)

Lubing a Lühder's bushshrike

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Tue 19 Nov 2024, 18:06, archived)

Hiding in the bogs at work
Because I don't want to mop the corridor
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 18:07, archived)

stay strong

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 19:17, archived)

Back to work, you lazy slob.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 19 Nov 2024, 19:33, archived)

Also, it seems some retarded wankbaffle
Has decided to try to insult me by changing my bio info.
What a tragic waste of flesh and oxygen.
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 20:01, archived)

careful, they'll change it to that next

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 20:08, archived)

I know
Hilarious, isn't it?
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 20:27, archived)

oh yes. definitely.

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 21:17, archived)

What, on here?
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 23:54, archived)

Hang on, how did they do that?

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 19 Nov 2024, 23:31, archived)

Fuck knows
But I can't change it back
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 10:15, archived)

Do you know when it changed?

( Sn0tters 🇯🇴🇧🇧🇮🇪, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 0:34, archived)

so you can check your diary if you were pissed up that night?

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 2:28, archived)

Exactly

( Sn0tters 🇯🇴🇧🇧🇮🇪, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 8:27, archived)

I could check the logs for any suspicious activity
Around the time it happened.
( Sn0tters 🇯🇴🇧🇧🇮🇪, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 8:28, archived)

Luckily mine is ok, Sn0tters.
So it's not the end of the world yet.
( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 10:33, archived)

Phew

( Sn0tters 🇯🇴🇧🇧🇮🇪, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 13:28, archived)

Trust me, I would never call myself thick

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 10:15, archived)

Yeah but when did it change?

( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 10:34, archived)

I don't know, I very rarely check it
But I've fixed it now
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 10:58, archived)

and your sig...

( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 11:02, archived)

Just ask Bou how she did it.
My guess is she just guessed the password.
( brb Learn Ukrainian and prepare for a referendum, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 14:36, archived)

I might goon with a baboon later
once I unload a bumload on a ribbed toad.
( brb Learn Ukrainian and prepare for a referendum, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 20:10, archived)

Ribbed for your pleasure?

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 20:28, archived)

I did my own research
and found that the American Ribbed Toad is otherwise known as a 'tailed frog' - and the tail is in fact an "extension of the male cloaca."

So it's more likely ribbed for their pleasure, I guess the females' pleasure specifically, since they employ internal fertilisation and the females are presumably the ones selecting for bigger male sex organs.
( brb Learn Ukrainian and prepare for a referendum, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 21:06, archived)

You have way too much time on your hands

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 21:10, archived)

I barely spend any time on my hands.
What do you have against knowing stuff?
( brb Learn Ukrainian and prepare for a referendum, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 21:31, archived)

Nothing
But amphibians, although lovely, are not a topic I feel like spending time on
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 21:41, archived)

Fingering a Fennec Fox

(2 Can Chunder - Work account arbeit macht frei!, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 22:16, archived)

Providing emotional support to a horse,
because I just care, alright?
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Wed 20 Nov 2024, 1:42, archived)

I saw that, Queef.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 15:36, archived)

Danny Deveightyo would be more appropriate.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 15:37, archived)

Shaking his ass?

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 16:19, archived)

-shak
+finger
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Tue 19 Nov 2024, 16:28, archived)

Fingering his shak

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 17:05, archived)

GESTATIONAL SHAK

( Cheers Cheers, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 17:50, archived)

i saw that queef
oh my oh my
good grief
i saw that queef
( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 17:13, archived)

Lol

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 18:42, archived)

Feel free to post pleasant things in this thread.
Suggested nice things:
ASCII art (not of horrible things)
Puns (nice puns)
Nice jokes (not mean)
Friendly messages to your online friends (no death threats or suicide suggestions)
The name, address and website of Bou's language school.
( brb Learn Ukrainian and prepare for a referendum, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 15:06, archived)

:)

(Bou threatened 🖕 not a good thing. SAD!, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 15:11, archived)

There you go again trying to score some brownie points
🦧💩
(Bou threatened 🖕 not a good thing. SAD!, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 15:14, archived)

DON'T FEED THE TROLL

(Bou threatened 🖕 not a good thing. SAD!, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 15:16, archived)

Alright thread

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Tue 19 Nov 2024, 13:50, archived)

Alright.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 13:53, archived)

Alright ocsp you weirdo

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Tue 19 Nov 2024, 14:27, archived)

On b3ta you can't see the weirdos for the treirdos.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 14:43, archived)

Alright

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 13:54, archived)

GEOSTORM

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 13:56, archived)

GEOSTORM

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 13:56, archived)

GEOSTORM

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 14:50, archived)

Hi

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Tue 19 Nov 2024, 14:27, archived)

I was going to try and stay away but Dave Trouser called me fat spastic moron
So that is cancelled
(Bou _, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 14:40, archived)

tenor.com/en-GB/view/fafo-findout-fuckaround-fuckaroundandfindout-you-gif-26826252
( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 14:44, archived)

I like that spastic's making a comeback. Might 'spam' someone later without recourse to e-mail.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 14:47, archived)

It was always our word.
Time to take it back.
( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 14:50, archived)

I get 404 there
Disappointing
(Bou _, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 14:53, archived)

But you *are* an obese, intellectually challenged monger
What should we call you instead?
(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Tue 19 Nov 2024, 14:50, archived)

arseboon dilbaro

( Cheers Cheers, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 14:52, archived)

Yes I prefer this

(Bou _, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 14:53, archived)

arseboon dilbaro

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Tue 19 Nov 2024, 14:54, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8431408
( Cheers Cheers, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 15:01, archived)

Cheers

( Cheers Cheers, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 14:50, archived)

No real names pls

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 14:50, archived)

QUEEF'S!
It's always better once you show up.
( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 14:51, archived)

So true, Trouser
So very true
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 15:08, archived)

You are Kolley Kibber and I claim my five pounds.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Tue 19 Nov 2024, 14:55, archived)

I can neither confirm nor deny, m8

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 15:09, archived)

Bollocks

(Bou threatened 🖕 not a good thing. SAD!, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 9:27, archived)

you would say that

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 9:31, archived)

Did you get a decent pizza in the end?

(Bou threatened 🖕 not a good thing. SAD!, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 9:42, archived)

yep!

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 11:20, archived)

Hey, sorry about the pizza thing.
Something to cheer you up?
( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 11:13, archived)

I'm.sueing you for that lost minute of my life

(Bou threatened 🖕 not a good thing. SAD!, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 11:17, archived)

perfect. thank you!

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 11:21, archived)

This is why I get miserable sometimes, these people took all the happy

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 11:23, archived)

16c, 12:25 in Pisa right now, nice and comfy. How's the connection today?
devitalia.it aren't the best eh, they can be a little bit flaky
How are the employers? Funny little outfit, but I think I know who I need to talk to.
No-one doxxes me and gets to walk around with a smile afterwards.
Fuck off now and stay fucked off or I've got a world of shit waiting for you.
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 11:37, archived)

Also, a public apology to brb, who is not Bou it turns out, sorry dude, you're still a fool though.
Also want to confirm that Lord Buttfart, who frequently attacks Smash and whom Bou replies to, is indeed Bou, if there was any doubt.
Both accounts have the same sign-up IP address.
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 12:03, archived)

In fact, there are 32 accounts associated either with Bou's IP in Italy or her signup email
It's a lot, isn't it.
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 12:09, archived)

That is both sad and entirely unsurprising.
How do you know this? Is there a way I can find out all sorts of things about everyone here, and use it for my nefarious purposes?
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 12:29, archived)

No, this stuff is not available. I'm resourceful and very determined.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 12:36, archived)

Good work!

( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 13:10, archived)

*adds you to the "Do not piss this person off" list*

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 13:15, archived)

See, there's a line, generally accepted online.
If you deal only with the online alias, in this case "mofaha", then basically anything goes in this place really.

Eg using me; "Dave Trouser, you useless cunt, I hope you unalive soon!", while harsh and a very hyperbolic example that would never be uttered here by anyone at all, is still on the correct side of the line. Even though such a thing would have Karens everywhere calling for a life sentence on the perp.

Once you start involving [real name] and [real life], that's past the line, and what follows is entirely deserved on the part of the offender.

That said, I don't think using [real life] or threats of [real life] in either direction on the public side is a good idea, and should be kept private/quiet. ie, don't bother threatening the fat spastic "Bou" in posts here, just do what you need to do quietly.

I remind you all again, that "you" are the ones that constantly feed the moron with attention. Once you spot a Bou alt, add it to ignore.
( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 14:31, archived)

While I absolutely agree with the above, and haven't given Bou any attention at all since she went full mental moron again
I'm reeling at the implication that Dave Trouser isn't your real name. My worldview is shattered.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 14:36, archived)

You're ok, it's "David Pantalon", so you can totally relax.

( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 14:40, archived)

*unclenches*

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 14:42, archived)

I was going to try and stay away but because you called me fat spastic moron, I cancel that.

(Bou _, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 14:39, archived)

youtu.be/RY2j48CACHI?si=AQwF2TRBRU1smEQ5
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 13:00, archived)

Hey! It's not my fault you thought brb was me!
That part I will not apologise for.
The rest I have already apologised for so fuck off.

P.s. please send the carabinieri. They are fucking sexy and I've been trying to get one in my house for ages.
(Bou threatened 🖕 not a good thing. SAD!, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 13:00, archived)

You can apologise by leaving and never coming back
your ban was permanent but you have just managed to circumvent it by being in a different country.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 13:14, archived)

+ , Sam

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Tue 19 Nov 2024, 13:16, archived)

I am trying to leave.
But this sort of drama makes it more fun to stay! Moriah you are not helping!
(Bou threatened 🖕 not a good thing. SAD!, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 13:22, archived)

No you are not you are still here posting
you leave by no longer doing that.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 13:24, archived)

you're not trying to leave, and this drama here changes nothing, it's just the most recent justification for you. it's not on me or anyone else, it's on you.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 13:31, archived)

I know it's on me and I have apologised
And I have said sorry
And I have said I will try
More than that I cannot do
(Bou threatened 🖕 not a good thing. SAD!, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 13:34, archived)

go away and don't come back, go to 4chan, i cannot understand why you choose such a tiny puddle when there are oceans of attention and conflict out there

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 13:38, archived)

I actually do feel quite bad that I have upset you to the extent
That you would get in cahoots with sn0tters to get my IP address and service provider which resides in Pisa. I looked it up myself a while back. Excellent bluffing though! But not quite good enough pork chop.
(Bou threatened 🖕 not a good thing. SAD!, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 13:40, archived)

Don't threaten me again.
And why did you delete a part of the thread with my comment?
(Bou threatened 🖕 not a good thing. SAD!, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 13:42, archived)

we're done here, i'll try something else

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 13:44, archived)

You're as nuts as I am
At least I admit it. There's nothing you can do to me and it's making you angry.

But for what it's worth, I really am sorry for what I did. If it will help I will try to stay away.
(Bou threatened 🖕 not a good thing. SAD!, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 13:48, archived)

Your apology is not needed as you are banned, you should not be here.
What you can do is stop posting on this forum.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 13:46, archived)

Hello Sam

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Tue 19 Nov 2024, 13:11, archived)

morning

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Tue 19 Nov 2024, 7:38, archived)

morning
Apparently there’s some weather today, is there weather where you are?
( Cheers Cheers, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 7:43, archived)

A bit, yeah.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Tue 19 Nov 2024, 8:01, archived)

i am not sure weather there is or isn't tbh

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 9:39, archived)

Have a great World Toilet Day!

( $$ ✅, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 8:13, archived)

hoping to get down to Trafalgar Square for the celebrations later but I'm a bit bogged down at work at the mo

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 8:24, archived)

I’m flush with excitement!

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 8:25, archived)

apparently record numbers have logged on the official website

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 8:56, archived)

I'll try
but I'm a bit down in the dumps
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Tue 19 Nov 2024, 9:10, archived)

i hope this year won't be as shit as the last

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 9:38, archived)

You're on a roll here.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Tue 19 Nov 2024, 10:20, archived)

Why is world toilet day and international mens day the same day eh? What are they trying to imply? How do I celebrate now? Drink beer while shitting and talking about football? Down with the Matriarchy! Give us back our foreskins!
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 11:29, archived)

*reluctantly hands back prepuce*

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 11:32, archived)

Finally, now I can pinch the end and wee into it causing it to balloon, then release it all in one go like a urine bomb in order to assert dominance.
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 11:58, archived)

consider me bowled over

(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 12:42, archived)

your favourite utoob channel
GO!
( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 17:02, archived)

fuck off then

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 17:32, archived)

just add it to the list below eh

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 17:57, archived)

answer the fucking question

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:00, archived)

i just ordered a deluxe pizza from dominos but somehow deleted all the toppings, apart from sausage. i didn't even get any cheese
so i got a pizza base with tomato sauce on and some sausage. fuck sake.
( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:02, archived)

just had to order it again can't be fucked phoning them

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:03, archived)

LOOK AT THE STATE OF THAT
i.imgur.com/zrlIHta.jpeg
( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:11, archived)

fucking hell
it's so sad :(
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:14, archived)

I am seriously still laughing at the pizza

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 2:06, archived)

Show the lid of the box.

( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:20, archived)

well that's a bit niche

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:22, archived)

DO NOT KINK SHAME

( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:23, archived)

i.imgur.com/bcXXRsL.jpeg
( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:38, archived)

I meant the top... I never saw a red Dominos box and wondered what it looked like.

( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:39, archived)

fuck you, trouser, fuck you
( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:40, archived)

Thanks, I can finish now.

( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:42, archived)

good lad

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:45, archived)

Also, have you let it get cold?! I mean, it's kinda food...
If you don't complain about this, you deserve it again and again. Come on, have some self-respect.
( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:41, archived)

i ordered online it wasn't their fault

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:42, archived)

Oh, so it was YOUR doing?
ahahahahahahahah
( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:43, archived)

yes i don't know how tho

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:45, archived)

it's like the surface of mars, only with a tiny bit of sausage

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 19:12, archived)

so exactly like the surface of mars then

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 11:22, archived)

every morning i look at the latest pictures from Mars, i think they're convinced they've found evidence of past plant life

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 13:47, archived)

He’s ordered from Dominos, self-respect has long since left the building

( Cheers Cheers, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:43, archived)

Good point, and the pizza is on the floor.
Everything about this is absolutely sad and hilarious at the same time. Thank you, Misery, thank you.
( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:45, archived)

the pizza deserves to be on the floor

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:46, archived)

youtu.be/gAYL5H46QnQ
( Cheers Cheers, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:48, archived)

oi! i usually make pizzas myself from scratch how dare you judge me
Just couldn't be arsed last night was a bit wiffled
( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 9:41, archived)

That is shocking
I'd go to the store and toss it at the manager
(Bou threatened 🖕 not a good thing. SAD!, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 19:38, archived)

So now they know you can be scammed and face no consequences.

( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:12, archived)

like i said, the list below

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:13, archived)

That would send me into a psychotic rage

(Bou threatened 🖕 not a good thing. SAD!, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:32, archived)

like most things

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:42, archived)

Hahahaha

(Bou threatened 🖕 not a good thing. SAD!, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:55, archived)

A Pervert's Guide to London

( $$ ✅, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:24, archived)

ooh very nice

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:39, archived)

J Saul KARKED

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Mon 18 Nov 2024, 19:43, archived)

can't find this one, who is it?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 21:35, archived)

fuck me blanked

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 22:13, archived)

Lmgtfy
en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jonathan_Saul_Kane
/no idea either
(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 6:38, archived)

he was gr8 at times

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 19 Nov 2024, 8:25, archived)

I don't have one

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 20:13, archived)

The one where they buy stuff and talk about the stuff

(2 Can Chunder - Work account arbeit macht frei!, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 20:24, archived)

The one where they say 'guys' a lot
And you're asked to 'smash that like button'. Man it's good
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 20:58, archived)

don't forget to go ahead and like and subscribe!!

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 21:27, archived)

Ideally right at the start, before you find out what the video is actually about.

( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 22:16, archived)

Charles DuMORT

(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 21:01, archived)

??
Ah, got it now
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 21:27, archived)

I'm making a list, can you think of anything I should add to it?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:01, archived)

Sea bunnies

( mongychops, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:07, archived)

Is this some kind of racist thing against mermaids?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:56, archived)

Molluscs

( mongychops, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 16:09, archived)

you would say that

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 16:53, archived)

Cheese

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:07, archived)

Our Lord and Saviour

( $$ ✅, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:07, archived)

He is the list

( mongychops, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:13, archived)

I'll look into this, thanks, is there a website?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:50, archived)

yes

( $$ ✅, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 16:17, archived)

Praise The Internet!!

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 16:38, archived)

Gay sex with the corpse of Alan Rickman

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:11, archived)

Well he can't stop you if you want to slytherin

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:15, archived)

I'll cut your heart out with a spoon.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:30, archived)

oh no

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:43, archived)

I clicked this, and I hate myself for it

( Cheers Cheers, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 16:16, archived)

It's terrible, I know

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 16:21, archived)

b3ta, you mean

( Cheers Cheers, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 16:26, archived)

disgusting

(2 Can Chunder - Work account arbeit macht frei!, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:31, archived)

People you have unblocked recently
And the reason why
🐒
(Bou threatened 🖕 not a good thing. SAD!, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:12, archived)

Frozen petit pois
Oven chips
Marmite
Anime
Mark Lamar's '90s haircut
( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:15, archived)

This is some listing right here, 5/5 added, thank you, A WINNER IS YOU! 🥇🏆

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:46, archived)

Dave I'm already sick of this shitty food, shitty cartoons, and shitty hair, what do?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:51, archived)

Ask ChatGPT to make you a 10,000 item list that consists of random objects, food, and memes.
It should last you a while longer.
( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:11, archived)

Will do Dave 👍🏻

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:15, archived)

Toilet rolls
Sausages, eggs, bacon, black pudding, bread, milk, cheese, butter and a tin of peach slices
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:16, archived)

3 items from your list added, thank you, you are the RUNNER-UP! 🥈

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:45, archived)

spanishfly

(2 Can Chunder - Work account arbeit macht frei!, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:22, archived)

he's making a list
spanishfly's on it twice
( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 16:50, archived)

More of a register really

(2 Can Chunder - Work account arbeit macht frei!, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:03, archived)

Illmatic by Nas

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:29, archived)

sworn enemies

( Cheers Cheers, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:34, archived)

Lists

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:46, archived)

yeah but
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Set_theory
The paradox you're suggesting does not arise with classes because there is no notion of classes containing classes.
Otherwise, one could define a class of all classes that do not contain themselves, which would lead to a Russell paradox for classes.
A conglomerate, on the other hand, can have proper classes as members. hth
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:58, archived)

Yeah but
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_lists_of_lists
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 16:12, archived)

"This is a dynamic list and may never be able to satisfy particular standards for completeness."
Mine.
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 16:38, archived)

Pike

( Cheers Cheers, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:47, archived)

Don't tell me

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:48, archived)

Dave Lister

( Cheers Cheers, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 16:15, archived)

Ever wanted to fly your own starship? Bridge Command is open in Vauxhall – a live, interactive starship adventure

( $$ ✅, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 16:17, archived)

COME NOW

( $$ ✅, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 16:17, archived)

i've always wanted to fly my own tiny insect that's why i go to Midge Command

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 16:21, archived)

Midgetits

( Cheers Cheers, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 16:24, archived)

fly drive
starship? Bridge Command is open in
star
p t
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 19:31, archived)

a banana for scale

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 16:18, archived)

a scaly banana

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 16:39, archived)

my favourite!

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 16:41, archived)

A list of all the things that are not on your list.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 18 Nov 2024, 22:23, archived)

Hello to all of the beautiful people here. And you as well, you hideous shit.
What's the best thing about you? Is it your sense of humour? Your stunningly accurate recall of the names of every character from He-Man? Your huge pendulous manboobs?
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 10:39, archived)

Hi to all (including that hideous shit, you know who you are)
I'm afraid it's nigh on impossible to pick the best thing about me given the incredible list I have to choose from. I'm fucking gr8 all round.
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 10:57, archived)

It's the manboobs for you then?
I'm just kidding, I'm sure there's a list of great things about you that's as long as Jeremy Beadle's hand.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 11:10, archived)

I can come immediately, thanks.

( $$ ✅, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 11:05, archived)

Some people like that, of course.
Just make sure to wipe it up afterwards.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 11:11, archived)

Hello Sam

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Mon 18 Nov 2024, 11:09, archived)

I'm not sure
I'm generous, apparently.
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 11:10, archived)

Give me 11p and I'll believe you.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 11:12, archived)

All my money today is being spent on my mum
As it's her birthday
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 11:15, archived)

Happy birthday Smash Mumkey!

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 11:16, archived)

probably my online personality

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 11:29, archived)

Yeah, I'm pretty sure everyone here loves you.
Except that hideous shit I mentioned previously.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 11:32, archived)

My incredible and unrivalled modesty

( Cheers Cheers, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 11:36, archived)

No need to be modest when you're that hideous!
Wait I mean hideous great
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 11:40, archived)

I’m having a hideous shit as I type this

( Cheers Cheers, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 11:45, archived)

This
*does this*
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 11:51, archived)

*comes immediately*

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 11:53, archived)

I'm a money thief

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 12:43, archived)

I knew it!

( Cheers Cheers, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 12:53, archived)

Not really, I'm Karl Popper!

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 14:39, archived)

-p +o

( Cheers Cheers, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:50, archived)

Oopper, Popoer, mm

( Cheers Cheers, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 15:51, archived)

Oopper, Pooper, Doopity Do

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 16:42, archived)

you called?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 18:19, archived)

Despite all the bad things about me, I do usually have a kind heart.
♥
(Bou threatened 🖕 not a good thing. SAD!, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 13:18, archived)

Oh something funny?
I am at the age where bending, laughing and farting are never mutually exclusive so I provide a lot of amusement to those around me.
(Bou threatened 🖕 not a good thing. SAD!, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 13:29, archived)

I can tell a lot about someone simply by putting my finger up their bumhole.

(2 Can Chunder - Work account arbeit macht frei!, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 13:43, archived)

If that's an offer, I'm in.
Or you're in, I guess.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 13:48, archived)

They don't like it.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 14:36, archived)

Never, ever trust a fart.
When I say fart, I mean a scouser.
(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Mon 18 Nov 2024, 14:15, archived)

morning

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Mon 18 Nov 2024, 7:09, archived)

Morning.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 7:34, archived)

mongling

( Cheers Cheers, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 7:37, archived)

IF you live somewhere with dark skies tonight is a very good time to go into the garden and watch meteor showers
alt: go fuck an elf
( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 21:09, archived)

Terrible bullying of people who live in areas with sunny night skies

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 21:17, archived)

it will still be good when your sunny night skies turn into moony daytime skies

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 21:30, archived)

no

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 21:35, archived)

such a negative nancy

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 21:44, archived)

Yeah well I don't

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 21:18, archived)

alt: go fuck an elf

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 21:29, archived)

The whole concept here is a shambles honestly. Meteor showers, plural? That's not accurate at all.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 21:34, archived)

meatier showers

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 21:44, archived)

Hello Sam

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 22:18, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8431210
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 18 Nov 2024, 2:34, archived)

brb claxxxon

(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Sun 17 Nov 2024, 21:21, archived)

HI I'M KARL POPPER

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 23:30, archived)

Has anyone got a really interesting mother's maiden name?
Alt: what was your first pet called.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 20:33, archived)

fuck off then

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 20:37, archived)

Nearly got knocked off my bike last night by a council salt wagon.
'You idiot' I yelled though gritted teeth.
(Planearm, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 21:03, archived)

jesus

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 21:09, archived)

LOL bike

(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Sun 17 Nov 2024, 21:21, archived)

knocked off lol

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 22:36, archived)

Hitler
Hitler
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 20:39, archived)

Watched Jojo Rabbit last night, hadn't seen it before, I'd give it 8/10.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 20:49, archived)

A bit sad though.
I went to the premiere of Gladiator II. I enjoyed it. 8/10.
(Planearm, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 20:52, archived)

I've been tempted but I think What We Do In The Shadows has had a bit of a chilling effect on my interest in his work

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 20:52, archived)

you fucking loved it you shlag

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 21:03, archived)

it went from possibly ok to definitely shite in about 4 episodes, as predicted by , Trouser I think
looks like it's into season 7 now, beating an undead horse
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 22:39, archived)

we had a terrible drummer when we recorded our first single, it was so bad we had to re-record all the drum tracks
I knew having a shitty drummer would cause repercussions
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 20:42, archived)

(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 20:48, archived)

badum-tish

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 20:54, archived)

Would you like my account number too?

(Planearm, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 20:49, archived)

don't give it to him! he emptied my account every single time I did.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 20:56, archived)

Hitler.
To both questions.
(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Sun 17 Nov 2024, 20:50, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8431177
( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 20:51, archived)

3928, for both

( Cheers Cheers, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 20:58, archived)

Hitler's lucky number?
b3ta.com/talk/8431184
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 21:13, archived)

has anyone bought themselves something nice recently? if so please tell me about it with diagrams
you can't say Tesla.
( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 20:15, archived)

it's a bit limiting

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 20:44, archived)

something nice is too limiting?
you tight fisted bastards
( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 20:46, archived)

Good evening
Roast spuds, red onion, kale, and chorizo sausages, with a local cider.

What's your food situation today?
( Invisible Wizard - 10th Level Nerf-herder, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 17:53, archived)

Had a few chips earlier
They've bloated me up, so won't be eating any more today
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 17:55, archived)

Miso salmon for the win

(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Sun 17 Nov 2024, 17:59, archived)

Wife's making a creamy tomato pasta with mushrooms thing,
There are Cumberland sausage slices which need used up so I'll cut them up and put them in mine.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 18:14, archived)

-ine
+y bottom
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Sun 17 Nov 2024, 18:17, archived)

What do you think my arse is?
A money box?
( Invisible Wizard - 10th Level Nerf-herder, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 18:18, archived)

SIR I AM NOT A BUM BURGLAR

(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 18:19, archived)

I hate macdonalds
But was a huge ham burglar fan

You didn't ask but I felt I needed to let you know
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Sun 17 Nov 2024, 18:21, archived)

I always loved how many homosexual slurs were theft based

( Invisible Wizard - 10th Level Nerf-herder, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 18:21, archived)

I can only think of 3

(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Sun 17 Nov 2024, 19:49, archived)

it's the number you're fond of? is there a standard number you like, or does it change according to subject?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 20:20, archived)

Penny slots

(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Sun 17 Nov 2024, 18:20, archived)

Well you haven't given us a slot to go on

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 18:52, archived)

One of you veggie then?
I'm veggie, but other half isn't, but I do all the cooking, so it's veggie every day - much easier than doing two meals.

My chorizo sausages are faked, you see.
( Invisible Wizard - 10th Level Nerf-herder, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 18:17, archived)

No, but she's decided she needs to lose weight so she's looked up healthy recipes.
It'll last a day, it always does.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 18:19, archived)

Creamy pasta is healthy?

( Invisible Wizard - 10th Level Nerf-herder, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 18:20, archived)

I think you've landed on the crux of the issue here

(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 18:40, archived)

faked disguting, like all vegetarian faux meat products
( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 19:03, archived)

Yes, you're so right: they are foul, verminous tubes of putresence
I can barely choke them down, they disgust me so.

Thankful, these aren't faux meat at all. They're mushroom sausages with chorizo spice.
( Invisible Wizard - 10th Level Nerf-herder, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 19:19, archived)

oh. well that sounds quite delicious.
can i get the recipe?
( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 19:34, archived)

I'm post-food
frankly it's gauche.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 18:17, archived)

Forin lefty

(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Sun 17 Nov 2024, 18:18, archived)

Stick with that
It's well worth the pay off in the long run.
( Invisible Wizard - 10th Level Nerf-herder, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 18:19, archived)

I identify as post-hungry.
My pronouns are nom/nom.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 18:41, archived)

Standard so far.

( brb Learn Ukrainian and prepare for a referendum, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 19:09, archived)

Just done a propel lol at RFK Jr's face
as the Trumps served him a McDonald's on Air Force One, good to see his anti-processed food campaign evaporate the moment he touches actual power to do something about it.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 19:13, archived)

I got jerk chicken and rice&peas delivered
It wasn't gr8 unfortunately
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 19:43, archived)

I hope you left a scathing review of this shoddy establishment

(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Sun 17 Nov 2024, 19:54, archived)

you know when you drop something in the kitchen, and it inevitably lands just under the oven
What are the chances your first attempt to retrieve it with your fingers will render it completely unrecoverable with non-specialist tools?
( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 11:42, archived)

There is no gap under my oven, so I cannot assist you at this time.

( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 11:50, archived)

fuck off then

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 12:13, archived)

same here, Trouser

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 12:22, archived)

gap under my oven, so I cannot assist you at this time Dana - there is only Zuul
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sun 17 Nov 2024, 16:07, archived)

I don’t even own an oven gap

( Cheers Cheers, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 12:23, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8431092
( Cheers Cheers, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 13:13, archived)

I've cleaned the house, put the washing on, done me cycling, I'm at a bit of a loose end now
Mrs left for India this morning so I've no partner in crime to cook a roast for. Been looking forward to a bit of peace and quiet for ages and now I have it I don't know what to do. Might go to Borough and buy a ludicrously expensive cheese slicer and a Ginger Pig sausage roll
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 12:26, archived)

might bumhole a beagle, also

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 12:27, archived)

oven gap tho

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 12:29, archived)

i might rectify a rhombus

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 12:32, archived)

Time to bust out the GameCube and play a bit of Luigi's Mansion

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Sun 17 Nov 2024, 12:48, archived)

Might do an early breakbeat hardcore mix
By which I of course mean 'a big splattery shit'
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 13:01, archived)

On top?

(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Sun 17 Nov 2024, 18:00, archived)

Reminds me of that gag from the St. Trinian's film
"Just got back from India, my mate's getting married."
"Hen do?"
"No, she's Church of England"
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 15:57, archived)

I've just been playing cards with my girlfriend
poker?

no but we snogged a bit
(sticklebricks link in bio ❤️🌟❤️, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 16:59, archived)

Liquor in the front
Poker in the rear
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Sun 17 Nov 2024, 18:01, archived)

That's bloody annoying
I wonder how many things are under there
(Bou threatened 🖕 not a good thing. SAD!, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 13:01, archived)

nobody knows

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 13:02, archived)

I liked it when Phoebe sang a song about oven gap, and Ross pulled a face

( broadsword now that's fresh, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 13:10, archived)

What are they feeding you? Nothing, it's an oven gap, and it's on a break

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 13:59, archived)

You've lost that oven feeling

(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 13:51, archived)

now it's gone gone gone, and it's won't turn on, any more :(

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 14:04, archived)

baby baby, i get down on my knees to retrieve an item from the oven gap

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 14:05, archived)

Owen an Elevator

( Cheers Cheers, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 14:07, archived)

eh?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 14:08, archived)

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Love_in_an_Elevator
( Cheers Cheers, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 14:10, archived)

The B side to Sex Farm Woman
You typed 'owen' instead of 'oven'
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 14:34, archived)

So I did, oh well I won’t edit it and hide my stupidity
-Cheers +Gonz
( Cheers Cheers, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 14:39, archived)

Go Your Owen Way

(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 14:41, archived)

I just assumed it was above my IQ, that's why I asked, I'm not proud me

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 14:43, archived)

No just my dyslexia I’m afraid, although brbou’s alt didn’t spot it either

( Cheers Cheers, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 14:45, archived)

oh, more deletion

( Cheers Cheers, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 15:19, archived)

Doctor Mengele, give me the news I've got a bad case of oven jews

(2 Can Chunder - Work account arbeit macht frei!, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 14:58, archived)

That's a very guilty lol.

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 15:58, archived)

oven gap

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 14:07, archived)

Gary Puckett and the Oven Gap

(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 14:29, archived)

ok so your name is gary puckett and you want to start a band, THIS WAS YOUR CHANCE TO CHOOSE A NEW IDENTITY GARY PUCKETT, ANY NAME YOU WANT, BUT NO

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 14:38, archived)

After reading this post,
he re-evaluated his life and has now changed his name to Hob Marley and the Microwavers
(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 15:42, archived)

catch a fire!

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 20:17, archived)

-v +w

( Cheers Cheers, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 14:39, archived)

👍🏻

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 14:40, archived)

Dunno, we have an Everhot.

(2 Can Chunder - Work account arbeit macht frei!, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 15:06, archived)

ooh baby

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 15:12, archived)

can't touch this

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 18:50, archived)

That's when you deploy the spatula

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 15:55, archived)