random tunes anyone ?
81.79.46.130:8000/listen.pls
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:56, archived)

I'm in
but only very quietly cos my head hurts

[edit] damn, the ratbag just put the Singing Kettle on. I'll have to put you off sweetie
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:57, archived)

o.k.
I'll try to be calm
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:58, archived)

we need another 3dinbash
when are you and your lully wifey free to come visit?
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:00, archived)

not sure
tis camping season after all
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:01, archived)

but you can camp it up
in Edinburgh just as easily as anywhere else :)
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:04, archived)

I shall once winamp stops spacking

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:58, archived)

maybe I'll drop the bitrate
would that help?
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:59, archived)

Oh no its not you
Its me

edit: god that sounded like we were splitting up...
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:01, archived)

pfffft
but you'll always love him
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:01, archived)

Its just that ive moved on

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:04, archived)

but we'll still be friends ?
:(
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:06, archived)

And i'll keep in contact

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:07, archived)

but please
don't show the pictures to anyone
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:09, archived)

Oh they wont go on the net luv
honest...
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:10, archived)

you're so sweet
I'll always trust you, sweetheart
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:13, archived)

*fires up limewire*

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:14, archived)

But Mykey..yo..yo.you promised
locks self in bathroom, finds pills , pretends to take them
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:16, archived)

*gets new bird*

*flaunts*
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:18, archived)

It's because you've been
listening to Aqua again, isn't it.
( DrPoppers Touched by his noodly appendage, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:02, archived)

Hey
Im a Barby girl
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:05, archived)

yay!

( Hidden Mouse, Sleeping Kitten Gromada? Gromada!, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:01, archived)

yay you
hiya
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:02, archived)

hello!
somehow that linked me up to the current FTL show with GC...

sorry :S
( Hidden Mouse, Sleeping Kitten Gromada? Gromada!, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:17, archived)

I'm in!

( robh, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:09, archived)

you're on yer own matey
I think
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:09, archived)

ooooh,
it's like being a personal shopper at Harrods or somewhere...
( robh, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:11, archived)

did that spack out then
?
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:18, archived)

Technology is dead
my housemate is cutting the lawn with scissors (despite the fact that we own a perfectly good lawnmower)
( Hidden Mouse, Sleeping Kitten Gromada? Gromada!, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:56, archived)

OCD?
extreme boredom?
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:57, archived)

uneven growth
I think
( Hidden Mouse, Sleeping Kitten Gromada? Gromada!, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:00, archived)

Has he been bad?
Is this his punishment mistress?
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:57, archived)

Is he
me?
( DrPoppers Touched by his noodly appendage, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:58, archived)

are you currently cutting
HMSK's lawn with scissors?
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:59, archived)

No,
but I edge my lawn with scissors for a neat finish.

I am old.
( DrPoppers Touched by his noodly appendage, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:01, archived)

I ignore my lawn
can't wait to move, the new house has a fully slabbed garden
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:06, archived)

strangely my dear,
no
( Hidden Mouse, Sleeping Kitten Gromada? Gromada!, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 19:00, archived)

Good 'ning everybody peeps :)
Blimey
( djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:34, archived)

christ on a bike

( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:35, archived)

this.
words fail me
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:48, archived)

Errr...i...would?

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:37, archived)

Well that's put me off my tea.
Cheers :P
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:50, archived)

Cor
I can see at least two luscious ladies on here right now.

*pinches Lu and Wicca's arses*
( Miss Behave - Delicate little flower, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:31, archived)

fucking hell
*rubs thighs*

I've MISSED you, you almost welsh floozy you.
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:32, archived)

I've missed you tooooooo
I must make more of an effort to come here.
( Miss Behave - Delicate little flower, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:34, archived)

'ello

( Hankster, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:33, archived)

Hello sexeh!
*frots mightily*
( Miss Behave - Delicate little flower, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:34, archived)

Hurrah
no one has called me sexy for ages.
( Hankster, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:36, archived)

And I said 'sexeh'
which is a million times better too.
( Miss Behave - Delicate little flower, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:36, archived)

I 4rthured you

( Hankster, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:43, archived)

...and Parrott,
right?
(Quatermass and teh Shit, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:34, archived)

But of course!
:)
( Miss Behave - Delicate little flower, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:35, archived)

Hello sexy :)

( djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:35, archived)

Hello me lovely!
:)
( Miss Behave - Delicate little flower, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:36, archived)

is there room for me too?

( Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:49, archived)

Yup yup yup!
:)
( Miss Behave - Delicate little flower, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:52, archived)

woohoo :D

( Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:54, archived)

It's my birthday tomorrow
but I have no internet access at work, so please give me early nice comments.

Or call me a cunt. I know where I am, after all ;)
( watashi-wa Evenin'!, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:25, archived)

You are assuming
you live until tommorow.
( DrPoppers Touched by his noodly appendage, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:26, archived)

true
please don't kill me yet, I almost have the money for you!
( watashi-wa Evenin'!, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:27, archived)

There's a lot of words I don't understand in your profile.

Have a big Happy Birthday from me tomorrow. I hope you get nice things.
(Quatermass and teh Shit, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:27, archived)

which words?
And thank you :)
( watashi-wa Evenin'!, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:29, archived)

Just thinks I can't prenounce.
How old will you be?

For my last birthday I got Glandular Fever.
(Quatermass and teh Shit, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:31, archived)

I shall be the ripe old age of 24
(I got Glandular Fever when I was 13, it killed me - I was 'dead' for 15 seconds - nasty nasty illness)
( watashi-wa Evenin'!, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:32, archived)

I didn't die.
but it felt like I was for about a week.

A long, slow, death
(Quatermass and teh Shit, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:34, archived)

Still, at least it isnt as bad as this
Childish Humour
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:33, archived)

Why?
Why Mykey, for the love of GOD why?
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:37, archived)

I thought the title explained it all?

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:38, archived)

well yes
but you don't help yourself much do you?

blimey.
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:43, archived)

Do i need help?
I dont think so, just persecuting a persecutor
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:45, archived)

if you left it alone
so would he.

But you wont listen to me, just hate people getting the wrong impression about you is all.
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:47, archived)

Well its not like i started on him today to set him off is it?

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:48, archived)

Many happy returns for tomorrow Sir

( Hankster, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:28, archived)

fankoo :)

( watashi-wa Evenin'!, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:29, archived)

CUNT

Sorry, that should be

BIRTHDAY CUNT
( diffy maybs, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:28, archived)

heheh
cheers :D
( watashi-wa Evenin'!, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:30, archived)

hippy barfdi
you cunt
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:29, archived)

woot!
:D
( watashi-wa Evenin'!, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:30, archived)

Happy birthday gorgeous!
X
( Miss Behave - Delicate little flower, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:29, archived)

yum!
*makes passionate love to you down by the fire*
( watashi-wa Evenin'!, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:31, archived)

Blimey!
It's been a while since that happened!
( Miss Behave - Delicate little flower, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:33, archived)

well, it's my birthday
so get your arse up here and make it my present ;)
( watashi-wa Evenin'!, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:34, archived)

Oooh, it's my birthday TODAY!
18. Oh yes. Buy me beer.
( Christian Bale of Hay in a field, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:40, archived)

job
hunting?

Edit: Reply is my friend.
( DrPoppers Touched by his noodly appendage, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:25, archived)

no

(Quatermass and teh Shit, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:25, archived)

she'll worry that I'm about to lose my job
she's supportive like that
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:28, archived)

Guten Aben meine liebchen
I'm at my mums, and trying to avoid her till my dad comes home. I'm hiding in the office - she knows I am here and is being silently accusatory about my being upstairs on the computer whilst she is sat watching cartoons with Reecey.

Think of a reason for me to be up here that isn't b3ta, my reason finding bitches.


please
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:15, archived)

You're looking at porn
to get the horn
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:16, archived)

You're having the world's first
self-performed caesarian section and you need privacy.
( Christian Bale of Hay in a field, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:16, archived)

That's not even nearly funny
*winces*
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:17, archived)

I'll do it for you if you want
Im a dab hand with a knife...Just ask Trixie...oh wait, shes canal bound
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:21, archived)

Re your username and comments below.
Will you please, please, fucking well let it lie, like I'm now trying to do. And just failed.
Thank you.
( Newington, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:24, archived)

this ^^
but you know he's only doing it to get a reaction from you.
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:25, archived)

I'm off for an evening of French sticks and pub quizes now anyway.
Only logged on to check email.
( Newington, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:25, archived)

French sticks and pub quizes now anyway.

Throwing bricks at shops in an effort to "stick it to the man" in Edinburgh.
(Quatermass and teh Shit, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:29, archived)

oh for gods sake
learn about your social history will you?

Nothing has EVER been achieved by cynical twats sitting on their arses throwing 'clever' insults at people who seem to give a shit.
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:30, archived)

Remind me of a time
when a handfull of hippes throwing bricks at McDonalds "achieved" something?
(Quatermass and teh Shit, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:33, archived)

This is a fair point
Liberal fascists everywhere know that the only way to get things done is to preach from the comfort of your home
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:34, archived)

I'm all for protesting, don't get me wrong.
But only if it's an organised one with real reasons and not just 100 people there because Geldof told them to be.

Also I thought protests went on usually outside the places involved?
(Quatermass and teh Shit, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:36, archived)

Hippies cant cross running water

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:37, archived)

it's all about awareness
and making the news.

There will always be people who use protests for their own ends, but to write it off the way you have been makes a mockery of people who died to give you the right to vote, go to university, have a freedom of choice - it sounds dramatic but it's true.
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:39, archived)

No it doesnt its him saying these protestors are twats

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:41, archived)

well
of course, with his wealth of knowledge and everything...
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:45, archived)

I wouldnt say it was any greater or lesser than yours
His opinion is perfectly valid
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:47, archived)

Liberal fascists?
You are putting the moron back into oxymoron.
( Newington, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:53, archived)

You should take stock of the way you try to force your opinions on others
the very meaning of Fascism
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:54, archived)

always thinking of the whores...

( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:24, archived)

researching activities to do with a child
for the summer holiday
(Quatermass and teh Shit, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:17, archived)

www.b3ta.com/talk/534244
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:19, archived)

pfff
I work in a nursery with children.

True Story:

Some of the children have no daddy and I'm the only bloke they come in contact with.

Consequently I'm a surrogate dad to some kids to the extent parents tell me of pictures of me on their fridges and children asking if I can read a story at bed time :(
(Quatermass and teh Shit, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:21, archived)

Ah bless:)
nows the time to raise an army of your own!
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:22, archived)

you should be flattered
it's hard to groom befriend children of that age.
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:23, archived)

Nahh tis easy.
Do some painting with them, smile a lot, tell some jokes. All sorts.
(Quatermass and teh Shit, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:24, archived)

This is a sensible suggestion
I'm just a bit nervy is all.

I hate having important discussions with my parents. I'm 27 for fucks sake, I should be able to manage it by now.
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:20, archived)

You were just coming downstairs

when a tiny fluffy little kitten was run over and you had to wait there with it untill the kitty ambulance came and even then you could barely tear yourself from the tiny teeny bleeding kitty

???
( diffy maybs, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:18, archived)

on the landing?
on the internet?


EH?
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:18, archived)

Yes
is there not a road on your mums landing? If not can't you build one? Just a little one?
( diffy maybs, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:19, archived)

for a little kitin?

( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:22, archived)

checking
bank accounts?
( DrPoppers Touched by his noodly appendage, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:18, archived)

I don't have one at the moment
so that could be tricky.
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:19, archived)

buying
dildos on ebay? Checking train times?
Fwappage?
( DrPoppers Touched by his noodly appendage, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:20, archived)

all of the above
:)
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:21, archived)

Because
you don't like her and feel emotionally distant from her. This is only aided by her seemingly grudging attempts to communicate with you.

Too honest?

You could always tell her you're researching a role model of yours called Oedepus, while looking for a mother's-day love swing for the two of you. That should keep her away.
(thisismyclone, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:23, archived)

you sir are a sick sick man
you've not seen my mum :/
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:25, archived)

Because you ate too many pies and are now stuck in the room
until you have worked the excess girth off.
( Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:29, archived)

ARF!!
She'd believe this one as well
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:34, archived)

fwap.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vanilla_Ninja
( Christian Bale of Hay in a field, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:15, archived)

arse, tits and minge! ^(nsfw)
( Laughing Boy, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:17, archived)

Jadeviper
why do you hurt so much?
( diffy maybs, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:55, archived)

did you call me

down there ↓
( Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:58, archived)

yes yes yes
it was me looking for that truly awful song, im very poorly at the moment and i would be so so very happy (why???) if i could hear that song again


love love love
( diffy maybs, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:59, archived)

Since you grovelled so convincingly

give me 2 minutes to make your sick desires come true.
( Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:01, archived)

and I've thought of another random song

*awaits head bashing*

I remember it but no one else seems to, I'm not making it up...
( diffy maybs, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:04, archived)

Here you are

orrible.mp3

Other randon song?
( Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:07, archived)

THANK YOU SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

YAY was far far better* than I remembered, THANK YOU.

Other song, I think it was by a guy called Mr Food or the song was called that, some of the lyrics were (ish)

"Chicken curry beriani peanut butter by the score, I think I'll have to go down to the shops to get some more"

And it ended with him saying

"Oh no, where's me coffee gone, I think I'll have to go down to the shops to get some more"

Know it?



*may mean worse depending on taste
( diffy maybs, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:13, archived)

my pleasure
I don't recognise your food song nor does Google.
I will work on it.
( Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:18, archived)

You are a bad taste music angel

I googled it before, I tried for a longy longy time but never got anywhere, but then again I am me.

(No I'm not Gaz)
( diffy maybs, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:22, archived)

I'm all teh ill
and have shivery-sore skin, headaches and tonsillitis. saw emergency GP today (local holiday, surgery closed) and got max dose antibiotics. I haven't been in this much pain (or cried about it so much) since the last time I gave birth
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:00, archived)

Jesus, we in the wars
I got SPD (Symphysis Pubis Dysfunction)and now need crutches to move, I get them tomorrow and the physio woman said i mustn't move unless I really have to, which is fucking annoying, I haver to sleep sitting up on the sofa at the moment, cant lay down at all, trying to decide what I'd rather have, SPD or your lot...
( diffy maybs, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:02, archived)

I'm still suffering SPD
and was supposed to be starting physio on Wednesday but I'm going to have to postpone it because I'm just not well enough. I've been waiting 10 months for this. I sleep on the bed propped up with six pillows
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:07, archived)

fuck
dont say that, so worried about giving birth now, how did you do it?
( diffy maybs, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:10, archived)

planned caesarean
cos I needed an emergency caesarean the first time. what you need to do though is tie a scarf or something round your knees when you have your legs as wide open as is comfortable so that when you're in labour they don't push your legs too wide and damage your pelvis further. you can improve the muscle strength (the physio will give you exercises, also show you how to move around in bed without pulling on the joint)
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:14, archived)

Ive added you on yahoo
I hope you dont mind, if you do just shoot me or sumfing
( diffy maybs, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:23, archived)

Ohh i remember what I had.
Glandular Fever.

Count yourself lucky it isn't that.
(Quatermass and teh Shit, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:03, archived)

I had glandular fever when I was about 18
that was horrible
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:08, archived)

I got it the night of my 18th birthday.
In the week previous I failed my driving test, got very poor exam results, was told I had gum disease and them my girlfriend dumped me.
(Quatermass and teh Shit, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:11, archived)

Good eve fluff minstrals
It's been a tough day at the office.

On a seperate note, this bloke should be banned from posting on here, I find some of his stuff very offensive


www2.b3ta.com/shes-in-a-wheelchair/

www2.b3ta.com/mong/

www2.b3ta.com/nonce-or-babysitter/

;)
(Jimmy Choo, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:46, archived)

*stays out of it*


*peeks*
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:47, archived)

15 year old boy
rapes teacher gets life. Quote: "Jeremy Dein, QC, defending, said the teenager had come from an "emotionally fraught" family background and had been bullied at school and suffered from a misconduct disorder."

Misconduct disorder. Is that what it's called.
(Small Beer, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:45, archived)

The question is

Did she love it?
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:47, archived)

Sounds like a real-life Chewbacca defense.
(MSB Load universe into cannon. Aim at brain. Fire., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:48, archived)

how long is life?
"He will be eligible for parole after serving four-and-a-half years". Shirley a 16 year old boy is going to live a lot longer than that
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:48, archived)

Hope fully not
Anal gang rape in the showers by Mr Big who's in with the warders, takes it's toll on a person's lifepan.

so I'm told.
( NobbyNobody 21 years a b3tan, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:00, archived)

we can only hope.
it should be part of the sentence
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:03, archived)

I'm back for a bit

( Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:44, archived)

Damn, and I was hoping for the front.
Have you been rioting?
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:45, archived)

my front is here too
but there's a baby attached to it
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:49, archived)

You *have* been rioting...
AICMPB


police brutality
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:51, archived)

I've been too ill to move
and in my bed all afternoon :'( has there been much rioting?
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:53, archived)

Nah, not really
there have been a few "skirmishes" and the protesters have managed to basically get Princes St closed for the day, but there are just far too many police to actually get any proper riots going with so few people.

Still, quite entertaining in its own little way...
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:59, archived)

I've just looked at the bbc news pics
the last pic is the police helping an injured shopper away. what the fuck she was doing trying to shop on Princes Street today is beyond me
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:05, archived)

*gives a bit*

( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:45, archived)

I'm slaughtering the fattened calf*
as we speak




*well, rolling a smoke and preparing to go home.
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:45, archived)

Enigmatic Enigmatic Enigmatic

Where for art thou Enigmatic
( diffy maybs, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:30, archived)

You need to be looking in the bathroom mirror
to summon him up from Hell.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:39, archived)

and have a rare* song as a offering
*awful
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:41, archived)

Oh it's 'orrible being in love when you're eight and a half
Got yer picture on me wall
Got yer name upon me scarf!
Oh it's 'orrible being in love
'Orrible being in love when you're eight and a half
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:45, archived)

you watched totp 2 last night
aicmfp
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:58, archived)

No ... I watched the new War of the Worlds film last night
which probably wouldn't have been improved by adding that song to the soundtrack.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:03, archived)

You rang?

( Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:54, archived)

Hurrah! I've got a new scanner
I never realised how much I look like a ape
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:27, archived)

Are you a sightless?


/Unsure of pc term for this
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:29, archived)

A cripple at seeing.

(MooCow_Byter, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:30, archived)

*snorts*
Stop it im trying to be good!
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:31, archived)

and doing quite well
I might add
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:35, archived)

Ta:)

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:39, archived)

I think you know full well what I meant
and now you are being petulant :P

I didn't tell you to stop being offensive per se, just that some of the race stuff was getting a bit close to the knuckle and was causing frequent arguments. People like you most when you manage to be funny, a bit offensive but generally amiable, NOT when you seem to be deliberately trolling.
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:39, archived)

I only do things in extremes
Tis my curse as a Saggitarian:)
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:41, archived)

It's your curse as a sarky cunt
We need to hook up for a pint again soon to remind each other we actually like each other in real life :)
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:42, archived)

Yes yes:)

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:45, archived)

make it handy
and I'll come
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:46, archived)

I think Nottingham is
about equidistant between the lot of us.
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:48, archived)

I hear they have lots of ladies there?
Also, i shall start thinking about the next Oxford bash at some point..
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:50, archived)

And the highest gun crime in Britain
I'm not sure I can be done with Amsterdamn after all but I'd go to the next Oxford bash if you sorted one.
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:51, archived)

Cool
Well seeing as you missed the last one i shall insist you come to the next one
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:52, archived)

Deal.
TTFN :)
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:54, archived)

Hand-job?
/cheap-gag
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:48, archived)

saggitarian White Supremacist

:)
( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:42, archived)

Heyhey
it's tiny hands!
higher yew then?
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:43, archived)

So so mate
Been moving house all weekend which has been a major pain in the arse, and then found out today we owe about £500 in utilities from the last 6 months despite paying every month as well.

I may have been a bit more flamey than usual today as a consequence :P

You cool?
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:44, archived)

fine matey
preparing for loads more helicopter work, and then starting new job type thing
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:47, archived)

Double sweet
What are you going to be doing?

Did I tell you I got that job I was going for?
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:49, archived)

you mentioned you'd got it
I'm going to doing mostly the same as now but in a different place and with a bigger team( which I have to recruit) hopefully more office time and less actual work :) once it's all set up and running, plus more time spent doing sort of stand up education type shows
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:52, archived)

Sweet
I think you mentioned it before I wussed out at the prospect of physical work. Anyway, I have to go and unpack everything I own. Catch you later chief!
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:54, archived)

no, I didn't fancy taking my chances with the blinding light

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:31, archived)

A fair point

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:32, archived)

You are Saul.
AICMFP

/biblical
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:34, archived)

very cunningly written Moose
You are Saul. you arsehole.
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:40, archived)

I am - kind of
do I win a prize?
I can move both eyes independantly as well - do I win a prize for that as well?
(P-nut Obsessive Compulsive Green Day Disorder..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:34, archived)

I am currently deaf in one ear
And you know what they say
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:35, archived)

yes, but you probably don't

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:36, archived)

nope?
I think you've lost me...
(P-nut Obsessive Compulsive Green Day Disorder..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:36, archived)

they wear big shoes

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:40, archived)

I would

(Borderline Schizo, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:32, archived)

You!
Havent seen you around her much recently...
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:33, archived)

Because.. I moved back home.
And erm, this PC has AOL on it. So I try to use it as little as possible.
(Borderline Schizo, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:35, archived)

I feel your pain

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:36, archived)

pain "special place"
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:39, archived)

Pffft

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:42, archived)

:( I hate my dad sometimes
Anyways, I'm off
(Borderline Schizo, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:40, archived)

SUCK ME, BITCHES!



And with that, he was gone...
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:19, archived)

I say you remove the first comma

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:21, archived)

I say you remove your fist from Comma.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:22, archived)

Which one?

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:25, archived)

Read that as
SUCK ME, BRITCHES! and thought: "Piratetalk."
(Small Beer, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:21, archived)

CUNTY SCAB-WHANGER!

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:22, archived)

My dog tastes like wet ho

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:23, archived)

Ah, the man with testicles like raisins.
How is the delightful Mrs Tea?
( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:24, archived)

Aye, me an all
(leaving that is, not needing sucking. That's another story entirely. Bloody geography).

Night all xx
( Dekazer, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:26, archived)

I got an A in Geography


/Useless qualification blog
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:28, archived)

anyone got
that torrent thread?
( the.jokl @jonksson, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:16, archived)

Mushroom
flipper goes within the circle of rice cracker which knows no fear.

/makes more sense than you
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:18, archived)

i saw it
yesterday i think, someone asked about good torrent sirtes and someone posted a link to a thread with a few sites on it
( the.jokl @jonksson, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:23, archived)

Oh. This?
www.torrentsites.co.uk
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:25, archived)

as delightful
as that is, i'm afraid it is not it
( the.jokl @jonksson, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:29, archived)

www.torrentreactor.net/view.php?id=5115523

/random
(Small Beer, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:19, archived)

cheers

( the.jokl @jonksson, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:25, archived)

whatchew talkin'bout, willis?

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:20, archived)

At the bus stop today:
Married couple, chavish, he 13, she 12, baby in pushchair... all three in matching Burberry baseball caps. Feeling afeared for my old age now.
(Small Beer, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:16, archived)

did you supply
them with a matching bib for the baby
( the.jokl @jonksson, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:18, archived)

Are we allowed to have a go at chavs?
Surely no one thinks we should worry about offending them.
Personally, I'd like to shoot their faces off at close range with a shot gun.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:20, archived)

Depends what you mean by chav
I have a personal near-hysterical loathing for the term because it seems to mean anything between "teenagers who have sex and wear shit clothes and listen to shit music" (i.e. "teenagers") and "the people who mugged me for my telephone and rape babies in council flats"
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:23, archived)

i agree
a 'chav' is someone who 'dresses above their station.

When most people say 'chav' they actually mean 'binner', 'scrubber', or 'pikey'
( monkeymanblue mathematically safe, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 18:04, archived)

w.t.f is it with people who put coats on dogs!
just saw a woman wearing a very skimpy top and shorts but she had a coat on her fucking dog
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:05, archived)

I think some dogs are so pedigreed up and inbred
That they have problems conserving heat

probably
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:06, archived)

Or alternatively they are just owned
by pompous cunts.
( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:07, archived)

Ooooh little fluffy needs a Diamonte collar!

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:08, archived)

A dynomite collar?
Cool.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:10, archived)

*presses the 'detonate'
button and blows up every single one of the yappy little fuckers*
( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:11, archived)

DOG TERRORIST!

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:15, archived)

A MUTTWA!

( trev Is not interested in your fripperies, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:18, archived)

A fucking Jihad on you!

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:20, archived)

A fucking Jack Russell on you!

( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:23, archived)

fairy nuff
but this was an alsation, big hairy well insulated thing and it's still rather hot up here
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:08, archived)

Actually it could have been to keep the heat off of him

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:14, archived)

fair point
but dogs have been around for yonks without coats, just seems daft to me
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:15, archived)

Are you sure it was a coat
and not a rudimentary saddle for carrying dwarfs?
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:16, archived)

not as daft as you may think
there's a shop near us which sells rucsacks for dogs, all different sizes
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:18, archived)

Rucksacks for dogs?
That's one of those things that makes me think "Maybe al-Qaeda has the right idea after all".
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:21, archived)

yep
from labrador to terrier
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:23, archived)

surely anything much smaller than a st bernard or a pyrennean
is entirely useless as a pack animal.

What could you get in a terrier backpack? A packet of smarties?
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:24, archived)

people who go hillwalking
can get them for the dog to carry his little bowl and food, bloody stupid idea
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:28, archived)

one more thing to add to my ever-expanding list
"why ramblers are mentals"
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:37, archived)

You could have suicide bomber dogs, though.
Put the bomb in the dog's rucksack with remote detonation. Nobody expects bombdogs!
(MooCow_Byter, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:28, archived)

You noticed the dog?
What's wrong with you?
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:08, archived)

I's monogamous
so I is
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:09, archived)

You're a tree?
I'm confused.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:11, archived)

So am I now

( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:12, archived)

Wibble.
*passes the jaffa cakes*
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:14, archived)

He's got wood?

( trev Is not interested in your fripperies, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:12, archived)

constantly
:)
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:14, archived)

It's plane
to see.....

/DTH
( trev Is not interested in your fripperies, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:15, archived)

it's knot
small wooden attempt at humour
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:20, archived)

Oak-ay.
That was bad.
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:24, archived)

sowie
turns over a new leaf
( Dill, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:30, archived)

They're probably Methodists or Presbytarians.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:14, archived)

Just a quick (and rather embarassing) question:
How'd you make images black and white in photoshop? I am clearly an idiot, but I just can't figure it out!
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 16:55, archived)

Change it to greyscale

( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 16:56, archived)

Greyscale?
I seem to remember something about f4....that could have been wrong. But how'd you do this greyscale business? I'm looking to put something colour in afterwards as a new layer, don't know if that changes anything?
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 16:57, archived)

Can't remember
I think you go to the image(?) menu and then select greyscale...I could be wrong - not used PS for ages...
( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 16:59, archived)

Image ⇒ Mode ⇒ Greyscale
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:00, archived)

I like your squares.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:00, archived)

Enigmatic introduced me to them
and then I hunted them down and made them mine :)

i presume you mean the arrows yes?
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:03, archived)

Wonderful!
Has worked beautifully. Thankyou both!
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:00, archived)

That's the one

( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:02, archived)

You can't
as they are invisible colours.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 16:56, archived)

Set the hue and saturation to 0?
Thats how I do it in Fireworks anyway.
( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 16:56, archived)

Find the desaturate button.
Press it.
(MooCow_Byter, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 16:58, archived)

I don't care but I like your user name

( Hankster, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 16:59, archived)

Thankyou!
then you are forgiven for not caring.
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 17:00, archived)