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# newsletter subject line wanted
write a fine jest
and win the contest
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:31, archived)
# FUCK
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:31, archived)
# ^ this
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:32, archived)
# ^ juicy
(I helped save b3ta! Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:57, archived)
# ^ pink
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:58, archived)
# ^ oboe
(I helped save b3ta! Pixieelf got his 1st front pg. when MJ died! Double Whammy!, Fri 8 May 2009, 12:02, archived)
# ^ papier mache
(I helped save b3ta! Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Fri 8 May 2009, 12:02, archived)
# Spreading like swine flu through the middle classes.
(I helped save b3ta! prince-igor si tacuisses, philosophus mansisses, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:32, archived)
# fiddling the expenses of the internets
(I helped save b3ta! MrSanity has maybe kicked the WoW habit forever, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:33, archived)
# like twitter but slightly less pointless
(I helped save b3ta! Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:33, archived)
# Get it while the server is hot!
(I helped save b3ta! Victor Meldrew, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:34, archived)
# your
board sig made me lol
(drhellno would rather be playing Left 4 dead on, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:44, archived)
# IT'S NEARLY 2010 - WHERE'S MY FLYING CAR?
(I helped save b3ta! The Alchemist king of the needlessly complicated, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:34, archived)
# you crashed it when you were drunk
(I helped save b3ta! Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:35, archived)
# dammit! and I had just had it re-magnetized.
(I helped save b3ta! The Alchemist king of the needlessly complicated, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:37, archived)
# ^this so very this
It's at times like this I feel we were lied to by the Jetsons
(I helped save b3ta! Tom OBedlam I have control of a tank, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:49, archived)
# that wasn't even his real family you know
(I helped save b3ta! Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:54, archived)
# More viral than a sneeze on a crowded bus
(I helped save b3ta! barryheadwound Mul-ti-pass? Multipass!, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:34, archived)
# i think this ftw
(I helped save b3ta! Pixieelf got his 1st front pg. when MJ died! Double Whammy!, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:38, archived)
# Imperial Leather in Swin Flu advice conspiracy shocker
(I helped save b3ta! Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:34, archived)
# wanted
(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 8 May 2009, 11:35, archived)
# Chemtrails are made by giant invisible sky slugs
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:35, archived)
# Donner Donner Donner Donner Kebabman
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:35, archived)
# oh hey there hotstuff
(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 8 May 2009, 11:43, archived)
# Gordon Brown to front the new ad campain for Claims Direct
(I helped save b3ta! Victor Meldrew, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:35, archived)
# innacurate pictures of what Maddie might look like.. take your pick of any of the links.
(I helped save b3ta! Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:36, archived)
# B3ta: If you've nothing to do for the next half-hour, watch our page open.
(I helped save b3ta! drbroon abloooobloobloo, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:36, archived)
# ha ha ha
(I helped save b3ta! Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:38, archived)
# *applauds*
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:40, archived)
# :)
(I helped save b3ta! enceladus, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:42, archived)
# Arf!
(I helped save b3ta! barryheadwound Mul-ti-pass? Multipass!, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:55, archived)
# All Swine, All the Time
(PsychoChomp, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:36, archived)
# covering your nipples with purest glee
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:36, archived)
# no one covers my nipples with glee.
I hate people for this fact. stuff negativity.
(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 8 May 2009, 11:40, archived)
# poor kebab!
as soon as i get some, i'll come round and glee your nips up a treat
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:43, archived)
# your chances of getting some are still better than mine.
(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 8 May 2009, 11:44, archived)
# heheh
at 4p.m, feel happy. i'll be in pain then, you won't.
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:50, archived)
# that just makes me sadder.
(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 8 May 2009, 11:58, archived)
# it's only because i'm getting my staples out today
i know it's going to sting. it did last time and i only had a couple then. this time, there's 36 of them to come out :(
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 8 May 2009, 12:00, archived)
# Equally priced for ladies of all cup sizes.
de-RIS: news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/8039332.stm
(I helped save b3ta! prince-igor si tacuisses, philosophus mansisses, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:37, archived)
# as a woman of huge boobage
I very much welcome this news.

Plus, they're giving a discount of 25%, so I may have to leg it round M & S and buy some hammocks.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 8 May 2009, 12:04, archived)
# FREE GURKHA KNIFE FOR EVERY READER!
(I helped save b3ta! printmeister http://tinyurl.com/c8s8fd5 for titanic T's, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:37, archived)
# I for one...
...welcome our new former sitcom star overlords.
(I helped save b3ta! prince-igor si tacuisses, philosophus mansisses, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:38, archived)
# it's a called a kukri.
(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 8 May 2009, 11:38, archived)
# ^ this
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:40, archived)
# probably this.
also this
(I helped save b3ta! The Alchemist king of the needlessly complicated, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:42, archived)
# and suddenly benefit fraud doesn't seem so bad
(I helped save b3ta! Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:38, archived)
# BUT WHAT DOES GOD DO WHEN A KITTEN MASTURBATES?!
(I helped save b3ta! weaver., Fri 8 May 2009, 11:38, archived)
# We have the biggest clackerbags of all teh internets.
(mrmatt is staging a 'dirty protest' on, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:38, archived)
# B3ta newsletter number 377 is this week sponsored by Twitter, almost completely and utterly pointless and thankfully now only 140 letters lo
(I helped save b3ta! HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:38, archived)
# hahaha
(I helped save b3ta! drbroon abloooobloobloo, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:40, archived)
# Very nicely done, sir
:D
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:41, archived)
# ^ ftw
(I helped save b3ta! barryheadwound Mul-ti-pass? Multipass!, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:45, archived)
# B3ta newsletter, it might work, it might not
(I helped save b3ta! HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:39, archived)
# Dianna Rigg was hotter than Joanna Lumley
(I helped save b3ta! Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:40, archived)
# ^this
but with one more "g"
(I helped save b3ta! drbroon abloooobloobloo, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:41, archived)
# :D
(I helped save b3ta! Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:45, archived)
# all the way. also hotter than honor blackman.
So there exists a partial ordering of hot chicks that was on the avengers.
(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 8 May 2009, 11:42, archived)
# see next week's newsletter for a better subject line
(I helped save b3ta! Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:43, archived)
# Clevar!
...just remember to suggest it again next week, and it will all come true!
(I helped save b3ta! Bee Nice |-|, Fri 8 May 2009, 14:46, archived)
# The meek shall inherit the earth. The rest of you can fuck off
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:44, archived)
# haha...
although I always did love the Onion's take on that one:
www.theonion.com/content/node/28994
(I helped save b3ta! enceladus, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:47, archived)
# News just in: Muslims and Jews feeling rather smug about swine flu.
(I helped save b3ta! prince-igor si tacuisses, philosophus mansisses, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:44, archived)
# b3ta newsletter. Simples.
(I helped save b3ta! riverghost servicing your mum since, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:45, archived)
# e-penis caught in zipper, 17 dead.
(Paper 'n Pencil Thirst is excellent, even better than I hoped, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:50, archived)
# Lazy Joanna Lumley unmasked! - Shirker Gurka worker lurker in Burkha jerker
(I helped save b3ta! HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:50, archived)
# Starting the weekend like Pete Tong
(I helped save b3ta! Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:51, archived)
# Tweet tweet,,,, Tweet tweet,,,, *BANG*
(I helped save b3ta! g0atchild Is back and has been away since, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:52, archived)
# England 1 Uefa 1 (Uefa go through on away goals)

(I helped save b3ta! Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:54, archived)
# Coming into your mailbox
Like a second home allowance
(I helped save b3ta! dogigniter - Saving the world one turkey ham wrap at a time -, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:55, archived)
# Housemaid wanted to clean house, £6500 for a days work.
(TheRiddler Hmmmmm... I concur., Fri 8 May 2009, 11:57, archived)
# we put the wit in titter...
(I helped save b3ta! enceladus, Fri 8 May 2009, 11:58, archived)
# The government have no knowledge of this newsletter being sent
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 8 May 2009, 11:59, archived)
# The Dom Deluision
(I helped save b3ta! Awesome Welles petitioning for foetuses to be rebranded 'wombles', Fri 8 May 2009, 12:01, archived)
# Dancing with pigs gives you swing flu
(I helped save b3ta! Awesome Welles petitioning for foetuses to be rebranded 'wombles', Fri 8 May 2009, 12:02, archived)
# Free Binder with This Issue!
(I helped save b3ta! Halk, Fri 8 May 2009, 12:05, archived)
# Susan Boyle hopes her 1st appearance at the Royal Variety goes better than Tommy Coopers last...
b3ta.com/links/Poor_old_Tommy_Cooper_keels_over_on_Live_TV
(I helped save b3ta! ..wil, Fri 8 May 2009, 12:20, archived)
# the perfect reason to get a P45
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Pilchard The king of B-movies!, Fri 8 May 2009, 12:27, archived)
# Reading this newsletter will protect you from swine flu
at least as well as that fecking leaflet will...
(I helped save b3ta! ..wil, Fri 8 May 2009, 12:34, archived)
# Now with more dubious links than a lizard-based conspiracy theory.
(I helped save b3ta! prince-igor si tacuisses, philosophus mansisses, Fri 8 May 2009, 12:42, archived)
# This week I have been mostly eating "Jade Goody Pig Snax"
(I helped save b3ta! Barry the Time Sprout one of your 5-a-day, Fri 8 May 2009, 13:04, archived)