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My mistake...

I'm waiting to be harassed by an angry B3ta man for putting up a warez link.

I'm sorry I didn't know it was against the rules.
Though surely if this was real life and I was in King B3tas office and he/she/it was telling me off and I said I didn't know then surely, suuuurely King B3ta would say, "Well, you should have known, ignorance is no defence"
And I'd then say, "Well yes King B3ta in your infinite wisdom you are correct"
King B3ta would then say, "Say Sorry"
"I'm Sorry" I'd reply.
I'd then be dismissed and I'd feel very silly for the next few hours.

(Olly Aphonix, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:08, archived)

well ok.... we'll.. um.. let you off this time

but i've never heard of this 'king b3ta' you mention, is he local?

(icedragon, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:10, archived)

I think it's Cal

he's got the user id of 1.

(

rob, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:11, archived)

oh don't worry about it ...

... I guess the rough idea is that as we break copyright on images all the time, we don't need to upset the anti-piracy people as well.

(

rob, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:10, archived)

do we?

is it not (sometimes) allowable under 'derivative works' stuff?
except when its offensive, of course. so you're right then...

(

rockyrobin, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:33, archived)

I really don't know

and hope that I never have to go to court to find out.

(

rob, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:39, archived)

Brian May to star in South Park

Make yours here

(

Manic can teach you the secret of fire, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:06, archived)

He has no

trousers on. The pervert.

(

Craymen, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:07, archived)

my my my

havent checked the spaz in a while have we???

(icedragon, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:08, archived)

ah yes...

but this is the first Brian may is it not?
On a Brian May day?
The link is just there (phantom) for those who came in late (/phantom)
:oP

(

Manic can teach you the secret of fire, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:12, archived)

ah.

in that case. sorry.

(icedragon, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:17, archived)

Anyone know

wher I can get my hands on a a steam powered nun that runs on coal charcoal?

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:00, archived)

Did you try

E-bay? I'm sure they have at least 12.

(OtaKuno, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:03, archived)

This is the last time I post this link

www.steampoweredclergy.com

They're a bit pricy, you might want to get a realdoll and dress it up in a nun's habit instead.

(

Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:08, archived)

Charoal....

Hmm, There's loads just round the corner from my office, but they're all wood-burning models.

(

Craymen, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:09, archived)

I know that it would be untrue...

100 posts...woo

(jim, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:00, archived)

I would love to front page it

but I don't understand.... Who is he pissing on? Why is he quoting The Doors?

(

rob, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:04, archived)

you're

joking too, aren't you?

(

rogan, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:05, archived)

Rob,

You need a tourist map of Paris.

(

Your Mum, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:06, archived)

er no - I wasn't

I see what he's on about now.

(

rob, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:07, archived)

sorry

I thought you knew something I didn't, and then I started to wonder whether Will Young had actually covered relight my fire by Lulu and all my confidence disappeared...

(

rogan, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:10, archived)

Isn't that

Jim Morrisons grave?

apologies if I missed out on sarcasm, and am stating the obvious

(

bloid ....dloibbloiddloibbloid...., Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:05, archived)

it is indeed

the gif arsed the writing (which was dodgy anyhow).

(jim, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:07, archived)

Yeah it is.

I left a bourbon biscuit on the exact spot he's pissing on

(Nacho, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:15, archived)

anybody

know of any good joined-up writing fonts?

(

aaarrgghh...wasps! !spsaw...hhggrraaa, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:58, archived)

check out

http://www.fontfreak.com/

(jim, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:01, archived)

oooh

treasure!

(

aaarrgghh...wasps! !spsaw...hhggrraaa, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:06, archived)

Go to...

Utterly gorgeous looking script font, I swear by it, very Sigur Ros esque...
planeta.terra.com.br/arte/type/fonts/porcelain.htm
That's a direct link to it...go get it, go on!

(Olly Aphonix, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:02, archived)

Message to whoever owns chuff.org

Why not combine it with similar code to Rawx's thing? So that I type fish.chuff.org I get a picture of as fish, and the word "Fish". If I type monkey.fish.chuff.org I get a picture of a monkey & a fish. Do you see? Do you?

(

rob, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:57, archived)

It's owned by

Danny Austin, of Ipswich apparently...

(

bloid ....dloibbloiddloibbloid...., Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:12, archived)

aha

and he's not about ...

(

rob, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:19, archived)

Photo Shop 7

Is there anywhere I can get this without having to wait until I can put it on my Christmas list.... so expensive...?

(

Lula too poor to pay attention, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:56, archived)

Maybe you could

seduce somone at Adobe, make them fall in love with you and get them to shower you with free software.

(

Craymen, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:58, archived)

Too easy..

(

Lula too poor to pay attention, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:00, archived)

Could you

get me a copy too?

(

Craymen, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:01, archived)

I would have to fall in love with you

so as to shower you with my wares...!!

(

Lula too poor to pay attention, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:03, archived)

My girlfriend might object

unless I got some really cool stuff.

(

Craymen, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:10, archived)

Fall in love with me!

Go on! You know you want to! :)

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:35, archived)

Ha haaaaaaa!

Yes.

[ ... warez link deleted ... ]

Now somebody find me HOLLYWOOD FX dammit!!!!

(Olly Aphonix, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:58, archived)

Ooh!

Rule breaker!
Rule Breaker!
No warez linkz!
Woot woot woot woot.

Oh, and hello, by the way.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:59, archived)

Got it thanks.

xxx

(

Lula too poor to pay attention, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:05, archived)

Five finger discount...

...at your local PC World, if you can out-run the fat, sweaty security guards.

(

Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:58, archived)

i was thinking

you meant the 'other' five finger discount...!

(

aaarrgghh...wasps! !spsaw...hhggrraaa, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:00, archived)

don't forget

Gimp, Gimp gimp gimp gimp.

It's neato, though the windows version isn't as 1337 as the unix one. But for everything I do prefessionally, as well as for all b3ta-activities, it's fantastic.

main page:
http://www.gimp.org

Gimp-For-Windows page:
http://www.gimp.org/~tml/gimp/win32/

and the files you need for windows:
Main Install File
Lzw Compression for .gifs (damned patent issues)
A minor update

(SnackAdmiral, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 17:31, archived)

Ever wanted to make a Cow do aerobics or other stuff?

Well this Dutch (you gotta love the dutch) dairy company gives you the opportunity. It takes a little time to set up, but it's actually quite well animated. Enjoy.
www.fjallfil.com/english/

(Muttley, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:52, archived)

dammit!

Yet another thing for me to while away hours on. I believe the expression is "Woo Yay". How's this for a first post?

(Mighty Llama, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:58, archived)

anal fish

Welcome to the board.

(OtaKuno, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:01, archived)

that's not Dutch

I think it's Swedish.
where's Mr. Pedantic when you need him...
This reply is too deep into the time-spazz anyway so nobody will read it...

(alfons, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 17:27, archived)

Hyperbanner

Client asked me if I could make one....

anyone heard of this ??

(

Mrfishfinger .com, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:52, archived)

Don't hit me

A hyperlinked 468x60 gif?

There used to be a Euro banner-share network called hyperbanner.

Or -- it could be one of the nasty drop down DHTML banners that MSN runs these days.

(banditto_of_l'oeuf, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:59, archived)

Ugh ugh ugh

Sorry to bother ye all with a slightly boring thing...see it as a challenge I guess...where can I download Hollywood FX Gold from, I'm not talking about a cracked version or anything...any takers?

(Olly Aphonix, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:51, archived)

going back to the aphex twin stuff i just spotted....

Check this out...
www.aphextwin.nu/learn/99906995499023.shtml

(jonomac, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:42, archived)

I think that was

blogged on b3ta a while back.
Come to daddy... or chips.

(OtaKuno, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:44, archived)

damn it

why can i not post anything without it being a repost!!!!
I either need speed of the pooma, eyes of the hawk or failing that, a time machine

(jonomac, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:47, archived)

the safest way to never repost is

make the stuff yourself.

(

rob, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:49, archived)

make it up, and then claim it was there, and highly amusing :)

Like: Have you seen http://www.monkey.chuff.org? It's highly amusing :)

(

bloid ....dloibbloiddloibbloid...., Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:51, archived)

Actually....

That is there...and it is a b3ta site...

balls...bad example... hee hee hee!

(

bloid ....dloibbloiddloibbloid...., Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:53, archived)

I've wondered about doing that

the amount of stuff we've linked to, and then it disapears makes me think I might as well do no research and make it up.

(

rob, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:53, archived)

true, true,

but I'm not sure i'm up to the genius levels of mr.aphex twin unfortunately.
though i could post a snippet from an Open University Record from 1977 designed to educate parents on how to educate their toddlers to like music and sing that scares me witless everytime I hear it.....

I can hear my knees go knock, knock, knock,
I can hear my feet go stamp, stamp, stamp,
I can hear my hands go clap, clap, clap,
But I can't hear my head go...........

(jonomac, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:56, archived)

aphex twin = genius?

you believe his press releases?

(

rob, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:58, archived)

anyone that can write a song about

milkmen with lyrics like he includes and gets away with it qualifies as some sort of genius

(jonomac, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:01, archived)

can we have "sporadically good" instead?

(

rob, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:06, archived)

I've only just appreciated him within the last

weekend!!! can't say that I know much about him except for having seen the videos to windowlicker and that other mad kids one ages ago. i just thought it was very impressive that he's managed to get a twisted face image recorded into a sound clip on a record.... type thing

(jonomac, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:14, archived)

is this for real?

it's in a directory called jokes, but i don't know...

(

aaarrgghh...wasps! !spsaw...hhggrraaa, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:33, archived)

Forget hell

You're going there! ;)

(

bloid ....dloibbloiddloibbloid...., Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:34, archived)

where is wally?
:)

(icedragon, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:36, archived)

nagging

away at me...where is wally?

ok! i give up! where's it from?

(

aaarrgghh...wasps! !spsaw...hhggrraaa, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:53, archived)

it from the popular "wheres wally" childrens books

Also, i believe there is a similar make of books entitled "wheres waldo" for our yankie chums

(icedragon, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 16:15, archived)

what a hellish place

(

Staticgirl, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:36, archived)

i got that image in a mail once.

the mail said something about an advert for a japanese water-park - something along the lines of 'getting away from the busy, hectic city...'

(crazymum, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:38, archived)

they're

not selling it to me...!

(

aaarrgghh...wasps! !spsaw...hhggrraaa, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:43, archived)

yes,

it is very real.
and scary....
it's in japan somewhere

(jonomac, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:39, archived)

it's also 1/3 full of child's piss

in japan, that's an attraction

(

SpunkyBackpack, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:40, archived)

Is it

salty like the dead sea?

Good for floating on your back I hear...

[edit] but the colour is disturbing...

(

bloid ....dloibbloiddloibbloid...., Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:41, archived)

Maybe on gay bath house night

I've now managed to make myself feel quite sick.

(

SpunkyBackpack, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:45, archived)

(spiral, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:47, archived)

looks

kinda edible from up here!

(

aaarrgghh...wasps! !spsaw...hhggrraaa, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:54, archived)

It's what they do in Mecca when it's hot

Compare and contrast. I'm going to hell on a Fatwah, aren't I?

(

Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:44, archived)

and now

we turn the taps on!

(

aaarrgghh...wasps! !spsaw...hhggrraaa, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:46, archived)

There's a...

...wave machine too.

(

Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:51, archived)

HAHAHAHA

hoohohooo
heheheee

you really are going to some sort of hell!

(

aaarrgghh...wasps! !spsaw...hhggrraaa, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:55, archived)

(

monkeon schmonkeon, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:30, archived)

I want one!

Thats genius that is. Genius.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:32, archived)

monkeon

you're my hero.

(

rob, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:32, archived)

quality

(

Fat Boab of dailyreckless.com fame, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:32, archived)

Why don't you stick together your best Brian May images

all on one page? A tribute to Brian May.

(

rob, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:33, archived)

i'm planning

something like that - hence the increased amount of May images lately.

(

monkeon schmonkeon, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:35, archived)

I just thought you were obsessional.

(

rob, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:36, archived)

i do actually

view him as my nemesis.

(

monkeon schmonkeon, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:37, archived)

Genesis are my nemesis

(

bloid ....dloibbloiddloibbloid...., Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:38, archived)

Craig David

is the bile in my belly.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:39, archived)

Everyone should have a nemesis.

I'm lucky, mine's a particularly quality chap.

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:39, archived)

Who?

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:41, archived)

see below :)

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:47, archived)

Awww thanks Dr. Phil!

Yer not so bad yerself! :)

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:42, archived)

supremacist

er.. can't think how to make it work, but it does rhyme.

(

rob, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:41, archived)

are you going to kill him?

they'd use print outs of b3ta pages as evidence.

(

rob, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:38, archived)

i'll tie him

to a radiator and make him eat his own hair. You can't digest that.

(

monkeon schmonkeon, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:43, archived)

Will that make his bum leak

then?

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:46, archived)

yeah!

chain him up and feed him a diet of human hair and Olestra!

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:48, archived)

Can you imagine

them reading archived b3ta pages aloud in court?
"At this point the defendant said, and I quote, 'Woo, yay, and houpla.' Clearly this is the sign of a troubled mind."

(OtaKuno, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:47, archived)

'And the client agreed that he couldnt fucking hummus before admitting his last post had been spazzed.'

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:50, archived)

*snort*

hehehe

(

Craymen, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:56, archived)

Seriously

wooyay.

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:33, archived)

i can't stress quite

how great that is

(

stouffer, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:34, archived)

very very

good

(

izb posting occasional messages since 2001, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:35, archived)

i'm having

a now-you-see-it-now-you-don't day today
but now i see it...
woo & yay sir!

(

aaarrgghh...wasps! !spsaw...hhggrraaa, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:42, archived)

oooohhhhhh

i've come over all homophobic in a juvenile manner at elton john's expense. right clicky, save as

(

stouffer, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:25, archived)

more May shenanigans

(

Fat Boab of dailyreckless.com fame, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:25, archived)

He he he he he he

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:26, archived)

poor

brian!

(

monkeon schmonkeon, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:28, archived)

quick vote

just been dum[ped by email by the friend of a friend in nairobi that rang me up to let me know she fucked someone over the weekend. vote: chips or mash?

(

Godzuki needs more sleep., Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:21, archived)

hummus?

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:23, archived)

sounds like you should talk to the girl

in question and not the friend of a friend.
And chips, obviously.

(

pep, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:28, archived)

that's your first

post. that's so sad. go and sit out in the sunshine and drink some nice wine with y'pals.
edit: oh yeah, definitely chips.

(

stouffer, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:29, archived)

oooh get you.

Still at least you softened the blow with some good advice.

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:32, archived)

i punch with

the one hand, i caress with the other.

(

stouffer, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:34, archived)

I usually get dumped by text.

chips ...everytime.. oh and lots of lager..!!

(

Lula too poor to pay attention, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:36, archived)

ask

her first...third hand news is always inaccurate...

and yes, chips...a nice soutyhern fried number!

(djmothra, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:32, archived)

we love you

chips or mash, chips or mash ummm... currently mash!

(

Staticgirl, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:34, archived)

vote daddy!

oh sorry...chips!

(

aaarrgghh...wasps! !spsaw...hhggrraaa, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:45, archived)

fucking hell

i go through the effort of setting up an ebay account in order to sell a poo and then find its one of the things youre not allowed to sell

(skagg, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:16, archived)

health risk

presumably. I set up an ebay account to buy cheap Amiga stuff... woo to ebay :)

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:17, archived)

can you not rephrase it.. it's all in the packaging you know

Like a 'satchel of manure' instead of 'bag 'o' shite'

(

Lula too poor to pay attention, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:19, archived)

Did someone mention

my website? :)

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:20, archived)

that website is grreeeeeaaaaatttt

much chuckling.
:-}

(jetsetwilly, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:37, archived)

Aww! Thanks man :)

Just for you, i'll endevour to update it sometime this century :)

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:44, archived)

it was just gonna be

one of my poos in a sandwich bag so bag-o-shite would definately avoid the false advertising

(skagg, Thu 6 Jun 2002, 15:22, archived)

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