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stalin´s cruelest weapon

worse than any gulag could ever be

(flexomat, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:42, archived)

gulag gulag gulag

gulag gulag gulag

(

aaarrgghh...wasps! !spsaw...hhggrraaa, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:46, archived)

Can we have

a man on the phone gallery please?

Because he's worth it.

(thediscokingpin, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:41, archived)

well volunteered!

:O)

(

barnesy, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:45, archived)

Bugger.........

(thediscokingpin, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:48, archived)

In an attempt to make children less

afraid of injections, doctors are trying anything they can think of...

p.s. i spoke of wanting to do this a couple of days ago, and i finally managed to do it...i have spent far to long on this...please be nice

(Dr_Never_Trust_A_Helper_Monkey, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:39, archived)

all you have to do is ask

(

isthisyou?, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:41, archived)

in the spirit of all things steve wright/chris evans

whooo...yeah
*clap clap clap clap*
yeah...whooo
*clap clap clap*

(

aaarrgghh...wasps! !spsaw...hhggrraaa, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:43, archived)

that is

fabbo

(

curry monster, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:47, archived)

*ROFL*

damn!!! hahahaha..!

(bee, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:37, archived)

how lovely

to be so happy. Hello bee.

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:38, archived)

I just had a really nice sandwich...

...that made me happy

(Dr_Never_Trust_A_Helper_Monkey, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:41, archived)

Ah,

but what about the Queens milky wee?

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:38, archived)

1977

Sod the Milky Wee

(

Fat Boab of dailyreckless.com fame, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:41, archived)

A cow nearby says:

(

Professor Fnord Regius Professor of B3ta Chronology, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:45, archived)

ha ha ah hahahah haahahaahhhaaahahah

that's funny

(

big daft dave, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:47, archived)

Not

if you're the Queen.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:48, archived)

milk, milk,

lemonade

(

isthisyou?, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:53, archived)

'round the corner....

oh thank you, I'm crying here, haven't heard that in years! :)

(

ooh..anus!, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:57, archived)

heh heh

seem to remember an associated rhyme to do with 'cherries' (ladies' nipples)

all a bit fuzzy after 28 years, to be honest

(

isthisyou?, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 15:00, archived)

your only just getting fuzzy after 28 years?

i thought most people got fuzzy around the age of 12/13

please elaborate on you nipple rhyme, i'm all 'ears'.

(

big daft dave, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 15:10, archived)

are you 12?

(

Fat Boab of dailyreckless.com fame, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 15:00, archived)

Woo! My 200th birthday!

And yet to post a pic.

And thanks to NewMatt for drawing my attention to this.

(Amerella, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:35, archived)

only spotted cos i obsessively click on people's profiles.

*rubs hands incessantly, mutters to self, checks lights are off six times*

(

new_matt, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:38, archived)

surely you know

the lights are off because:
1) you didn't turn 'em on 6 times
2) it's dark :)

(

witchy is covered in BEES, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:50, archived)

not one picture

in 2547 attempts? Blimey, that must be some sort of record.
EDIT: Happy B3ta day though!

(

Dr Drink, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:38, archived)

If you'd seen my complete lack of skill with anything,

you'd know why.

It did concern me that New Matt has been here one day more than me and has posted 500 odd messages...

(Amerella, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:40, archived)

it's amazing what you can do with mspaint

if you put your mind to it.

i didn't post for ages cos i signed up then got a new job almost immediately. but *they* aren't watching me as closely now...

(

new_matt, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:43, archived)

MS Paint

is good for doing obvious gags that don't need a really nice looking picture.

(

Dr Drink, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:46, archived)

Having just clicked on

your profile i feel obligied to ask:
where the hell did you get that hat?

(thediscokingpin, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:43, archived)

I want to have

a "complete lack of skill with anything". That sounds like fun.

(

Dr Drink, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:48, archived)

ooh, check mine, check mine

one pic, 200 odd days, fuck knows how many posts

(

isthisyou?, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:40, archived)

that's one pic on the front page, though.

Amerella has never even posted a pic. 'Cos she only has a computer at work, and no webspace, and stuff.

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:44, archived)

and she's

a big spacker.
snigger

(

stouffer, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:46, archived)

*slap*

you only say that 'cos you know she's out of your league, sour-grapes boy.

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:49, archived)

i'll have

you know i'm the sexiest person in my flat. at the moment.

(

stouffer, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:52, archived)

hee

hee

(

isthisyou?, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:54, archived)

is that

including or excluding inanimate objects?

(

Slim has found god. He was down the back of the sofa., Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:57, archived)

bollocks

i'd forgotten my ernie lamp. ah well, 2nd sexiest is still good.

(

stouffer, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:59, archived)

hooray!

have you been dressed as a witch the whole time?

(

rogan, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:40, archived)

happy

beefday.

(

stouffer, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:41, archived)

baby hopping

(

Fat Boab of dailyreckless.com fame, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:33, archived)

aahhh...

is that you? Or your younger brother?

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:34, archived)

mwa ha ha ha

take that cake boy

(

stouffer, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:36, archived)

I'm just out of shot

...with the orange feet.

(

Fat Boab of dailyreckless.com fame, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:38, archived)

help me!!!

where can i find a downloadable copy of photoshop? i need it 4 my media coursework

(theyerack, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:33, archived)

eh?

I think you'll find you need to BUY it.

We don't talk about downloading software on this messageboard... it might sound like the mods were endorsing such behaviour.

For the safety of b3ta, kids - don't talk about it on the board.

/end humourless old woman.

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:36, archived)

try a demo version

from a computer magazine or buy Photoshop Elements - it's under £100 quid

Or do what I did when I was at college and required to do my coursework in Quark Express - I used Paint Shop Pro and none of the instructors noticed!!!!!

not that I approve of any jiggery-pokery, of course.

(

Staticgirl, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:36, archived)

Arrrrrrr

Ye'll be wantin' to talk to yer Buccaneers of th' Malaysian Main then, me laddie!

[edit] this is just an excuse for some out-of-season pirate talk, and is not in any way an endorsement of the activities reported in the linked news item.

(Indole Ring, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:36, archived)

yes

You could offer to wash all the cars in your street, and you'd soon save enough money for your own copy.

that's what I did.

{/lie}

(

isthisyou?, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:43, archived)

You must mean the

Photoshop tryout version.

www.adobe.com/products/tryadobe/main.jhtml#product=39

download gimp for free, or get PSP or Photoshop elemments. I reckon you could a version cheap somewhere.

(

Craymen, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:58, archived)

The two fattest cats in my life...

So, I know I have no talent...but at least I try..

(ratface, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:26, archived)

we can see who ate

all the kittikat pies then

(

Slim has found god. He was down the back of the sofa., Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:28, archived)

Fat cats

are a wonder to behold.

(Indole Ring, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:34, archived)

even

really small ones

(

big daft dave, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:40, archived)

I like the cats

that are dog shaped and bark.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:45, archived)

That has inspired me

to post yet another unaltered kitten picture.

Help, I'm being seduced by the Dark Side of the Hummus!

(Indole Ring, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:48, archived)

keep at it

it'll be worth it.
you've got the subject matter right for a start :)

(

mnb098mnb used to be here, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:38, archived)

woooooo.

best at being the fourth member of the muskehounds.

(

stouffer, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:20, archived)

ahah

ahahaha

can we have - 3 yrs later going to see mr chinnery for the last time - ?

(

aaarrgghh...wasps! !spsaw...hhggrraaa, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:24, archived)

one for all and all for one

muskerhounds are always ready
one for all and all for one... etc

(

barnesy, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:30, archived)

help me

i have got win xp, and somehow the menu thing at the side which usually has loads of options, like "view as slide show" etc has gone........how can i get it back...?
Heres picture of a monkey on a hippo to appease you all :)

(

EdibleVomit, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:16, archived)

to enable filmstrip view

1. Right-click the folder and select Properties from the context menu.
2. Select the Customize tab.
3. Under "Use this folder type as a template:", select either Photo Album or Pictures and click OK.
4. From the Windows Explorer View menu, select Filmstrip to view the pictures from within the selected folder.

(

Slim has found god. He was down the back of the sofa., Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:26, archived)

1 - no

2 - haven't a clue
3 - /appeased

(

aaarrgghh...wasps! !spsaw...hhggrraaa, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:27, archived)

Hippos

just have that appeasing knack.

Monkeys.....mnmnmnmnmnm...not sure

(thediscokingpin, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:31, archived)

Help me please.

I've seen people do animations which transform one face to another. Have you clever people done these manually frame by frame, or have you got some clever software that does it ? If so, what is it ?

(Redbull_(UK) pfffft, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:11, archived)

I think that's called a "morph"

Do a web search for morph software.

(Indole Ring, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:19, archived)

send me an email if you have a PC

as I have a tiny little bit of software which does the trick (and is freeware, so I'm not being naughty).
My email is my profile

(

Pootle, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:32, archived)

(partee-max, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:09, archived)

LOL

best one yet

(HungOver, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:15, archived)

YAY & WOO

i've just won a free weeks trail at cannons gym thanks to the nice people at coca cola.

has only taken me 6524 cans to win something.

looky proof.

(

Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:00, archived)

I got one that said "Jim".

But I threw it away.
*coat*

(

Hugo Rune, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:02, archived)

bet

you've got gorgeous teeth!

(

aaarrgghh...wasps! !spsaw...hhggrraaa, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:03, archived)

it'll take longer than a week

to work off all that coke

(

Professor Fnord Regius Professor of B3ta Chronology, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:03, archived)

s'ok, it was diet coke.

and i'll never use it so if anyone want's a free membership for a week to cannons gym, you can have it. you also get 50% of membership if you're that way inclined.

(

Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:07, archived)

shame about the brain cancer

then

(

isthisyou?, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:44, archived)

this worked in my head...

(

aaarrgghh...wasps! !spsaw...hhggrraaa, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 13:59, archived)

hem hem

after the initial burst of stupidity, these get better and better.

(

new_matt, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:04, archived)

WARNING- POP BITCH IS DOWN

Beware of an onslaught of bitter and twisted media/design/IT and student types.
Hope this isn't too late my friends, i've been away.

(z_list, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 13:57, archived)

Mr/Miss Z List

your appearance only ever means one thing
and you have kindly informed us of it!!
so just sit back and watch the pics flow by whilst you wait for "the bitch" to get back online

(

raw-edge, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:09, archived)

U talk to me with such a forceful tone

I like that.

should i put my finger on my lip

(z_list, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:12, archived)

5 replies?

Mmm, slick!

Sorry, just trying to make you feel at home. ;)

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:16, archived)

don't want you feeling

like your not being abused and ridiculed whilst popbitch is down

(

raw-edge, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:18, archived)

POP WHAT?

you people confuddle me sometimes you know that!

(

mnb098mnb used to be here, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:14, archived)

Stop-Itch

I think it's some kind of flea powder

(Indole Ring, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:26, archived)

pob-bitch?

(

new_matt, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:30, archived)

cool,

does that mean that I can ask if anyone else has heard the rumour that Iris Law is to play Leah Betts in a new movie?

(doltage, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:35, archived)

Sir? Can you help get my kitty out of the tree?

(

zog why change it now?, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 13:56, archived)

Arrrrrrrrggghh!

Dropspidercat! Run!

(Indole Ring, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:00, archived)

eeeeeeeeek

(

aaarrgghh...wasps! !spsaw...hhggrraaa, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:01, archived)

*SCREAMS IN TERROR*

NO! Take it away!! Mummeeeeee...

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:02, archived)

breath deeply

and count to ten whilst walking aaway from the monitor!

1, 2, 3 oh fuck it just switch your monitor off for 10 minutes it should be gone by then

(

raw-edge, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:16, archived)

I'll never be able to look

at a kitten in the same way again...

(Amerella, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:27, archived)

aw.

I thought it was kinda pretty.

I also thought that it would frontpage. dammit dammit dammit! made a new logo and everything. oh well, off to my doctor's appointment.

(

zog why change it now?, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:31, archived)

pretty?

You took my favourite thing: kittens
You took my most hated thing: spiders

...and you made them one.

That's not the kind of evil I can easily forgive.

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:34, archived)

yeah,

but I thought I harmlessified it by giving the whole thing that secretary's-office-poster look. it'll be one of the all time favorites one day like, you know, "you don't have to be crazy to work here, but it helps", " it's hard to fly with eagles when you work with turkeys", "hang in there", and "just... a... little... closer..."

(

zog why change it now?, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:40, archived)

seconded!

ergh!

(

Staticgirl, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:55, archived)

I'm surprised

it didn't frontpage - I liked it lots.

(

bob dinosaur, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:45, archived)

I'm really quite disappointed

that I didn't get a single peep of encouragement. not a woo. not a yay. not even an approving cough. must be the negative influence of all the pop-bitch refugees today. now I really am off to my doctor's appointment.

edit: ceppin fer you mr. dinosaur!

(

zog why change it now?, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 15:03, archived)

(

monkeon schmonkeon, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 13:54, archived)

how very sad

His head looks like a pumpkin though so at least the teasing will stop now

(

Professor Fnord Regius Professor of B3ta Chronology, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 13:56, archived)

hahahahahh

fucking nutter!
latte on screen now!

(

Hugo Rune, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 13:56, archived)

brilliant

Woo!

(

bean, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 13:57, archived)

that is

v.good

(

curry monster, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:10, archived)

you need help

woo and yay!

(

beardman, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:28, archived)

Right!

I'm off for now!
I'll be back at some time tonight, but might not come online again as I have to actually get up tomorrow!

See ya later b3tans!

(Nocturnia, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 13:52, archived)

what?

(dont care, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 13:59, archived)

nice.

ohhhh look, an arsehole!
ehehehe didnt get to call anyone an asshole in about 4 days, so couldnt resist this opportunity :)

(

Hugo Rune, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 14:01, archived)

Kitten wallpaper?

(Nocturnia, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 13:50, archived)

A gay kitten

Nice shirt

(

Mrfishfinger .com, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 13:53, archived)

Warning: Smoking Can Seriously Damage Your Health

/Afternoon All

(

Andi is member 695 so have some damn respect, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 13:44, archived)

ha ha

that is very nice.

that reminds me, can you pop round the shops and get me some fags, cheers.

(

Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 13:50, archived)

Spot the office gimp...

He only sits two metres away from me and has to use B3ta to talk. Awww.

(

Andi is member 695 so have some damn respect, Mon 7 Oct 2002, 13:51, archived)

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