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This is a link post Cracking balls, Grommit!
Not Photoshopped.

Edit: Seems kudos is due to https://twitter.com/lissa_ht
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 16:24, Reply)
This is a link post black bush
where's my thumbnail?
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 16:22, Reply)
This is a normal post loves me a bit of Dave Chapell :D nice one!

(, Thu 6 Aug 2015, 11:48, Reply)
This is a link post Spot the drowning child. Watch, read and learn.
Drowning does not look like most people expect.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 16:06, Reply)
This is a normal post without clicking
its a silent sinking deal. Thrashing around is not drowning.

Apparently there's some crazy reflex that paralyses you and you just sink.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 16:21, Reply)
This is a normal post Almost. Silent bobbing before sinking.
You'll never believe what happens next!
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 16:26, Reply)
This is a normal post could be a plot for a pornfilm

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 16:37, Reply)
This is a normal post + fwap

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 16:26, Reply)
This is a normal post I got it...but that kid wasn't drowning
He was just shit at reaching his inflatable and frankly if he can't swim WTF was he doing in a f*cking wave pool at the deep end!?

I was a qualified life guard (now lapsed) and did it for three years as summer jobs and what you quickly realise is that some people are really really thick when it comes to risk evaluation - Work out who the fucktards are BEFORE they get in the pool and you've done 95% of all the work you need to do.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 16:28, Reply)
This is a normal post Wise words.
But I'd like to think if for some reason one of my family, or me, got into difficulty then someone might help.
They can berate me after they've saved me.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 16:53, Reply)
This is a normal post It's like a Where's Wally where Wally cannot swim and is black.
Is everyone of the victims in these black?
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 16:29, Reply)
This is a normal post It's a prank it's a prank pleasedonthitmeagain!

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 17:27, Reply)
This is a normal post I noticed that too
All vids I saw, black kid drowning. Every time!
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 18:25, Reply)
This is a normal post Oh, now this is interesting, and could explain your observations:
www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-11172054
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 19:43, Reply)
This is a normal post Some interesting names there
DeKendrix,JaTavious,Takeitha,JaMarcus,Litrelle,Latevin and LaDarius.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 20:51, Reply)
This is a normal post interesting
I'd heard of the stereotype but never looked into it.
(, Thu 6 Aug 2015, 15:51, Reply)
This is a normal post I kept pressing F5 to try another one and see if it was a non black person drowning
Gave up after watching 15 of them.

If I ran that place I'd put a sign up saying no dogs, irish or b....actually I'd better not go there even though my insurance premiums would likely drop.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 22:15, Reply)
This is a normal post This is great.

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 16:34, Reply)
This is a normal post Different video each time you open it
It seems they didn't know how to swim, which is a bit mental given they are in a swimming pool, not in the process of being taught to swim
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 16:54, Reply)
This is a normal post Hadn't noticed that.
Just watched one where I spotted the drownee quickly, but it was ages before he was saved and he was going down. Not nice to see. But they all lived happily ever after.

I think the wave action catches some of them out. Suddenly the water is a couple of feet deeper and they can't touch the bottom.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 17:07, Reply)
This is a normal post Everyone looks like they're having a lovely time to be honest.

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 18:10, Reply)
This is a normal post Yeah, and I'm sat at a computer watching this, so there's little I could do to help even if I could spot them.

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 19:27, Reply)
This is a normal post I'm the kind of guy who can't even see the gorilla when I'm expecting it, though.

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 20:05, Reply)
This is a link post Short interview with the art student who wrote Shia LaBeouf's inspirational speech
The entire art project: https://vimeo.com/125095515
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 15:25, Reply)
This is a link post The Spice Extends Life.

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 14:44, Reply)
This is a normal post The spice must flow

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 15:35, Reply)
This is a normal post He who controls the Spice, controls the universe!

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 15:37, Reply)
This is a normal post Excellent
I'll stick to the kebab with extra chilli sauce diet, then, and presumably still be sprightly in my 90s.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 15:41, Reply)
This is a normal post ^ said Paul Atreides

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 16:23, Reply)
This is a link post Fundamentals of Cheese Science
Today I learned that solid cheeses from the fridge are excellent conductors after giving a colleague an electrical shock when handing them a piece of smoked bavarian cheese. This led to a few google searches, one of which turned up this rather excellently titled (but rather pricey) book.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 14:43, Reply)
This is a normal post that never would have o curd to me

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 15:30, Reply)
This is a normal post actually, it seems rather emmenthalery, my dear man

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 15:33, Reply)
This is a normal post Edam you and your puns -
you're really making me see Red (Leicester).
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 15:51, Reply)
This is a normal post There is an Abondance of them...
Gouda keep up!
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 16:07, Reply)
This is a normal post we ought to go for a chevre-on here

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 16:23, Reply)
This is a normal post Kefalotyri tantrums will result.

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 16:07, Reply)
This is a normal post Whey to go, but
to avoid abuse from(age) others, cheese puns should be used very Caerphilly.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 16:37, Reply)
This is a normal post I wonder if the research was paneer reviewed

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 17:24, Reply)
This is a normal post I think it was considered a feta-compli.

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 17:29, Reply)
This is a normal post Ningradle!

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 15:56, Reply)
This is a normal post I bet the dog one turns out to be a Tory MP.

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 16:12, Reply)
This is a link post Aphex Twin - Selected Ambient Works 85-92

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 14:13, Reply)
This is a normal post 30:33 Heliosphan
FTW
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 14:20, Reply)
This is a normal post Still great
Although the title is something of a misnomer. Used to have the vinyl of this kicking around, but it was scratched to buggery after way too many plays
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 15:35, Reply)
This is a normal post awesome

(, Fri 7 Aug 2015, 12:50, Reply)
This is a link post this is genius animation
love it
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 14:03, Reply)
This is a normal post That's amazing
Thanks for sharing.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 14:49, Reply)
This is a normal post pleasure :D

(, Thu 6 Aug 2015, 11:49, Reply)
This is a normal post check out his other stuff, it's out of this world!

(, Thu 6 Aug 2015, 11:50, Reply)
This is a normal post That mouse is such a dick

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 18:27, Reply)
This is a normal post believe!!!

(, Thu 6 Aug 2015, 11:50, Reply)
This is a link post First a banker actually goes to jail, and now this..?
Fuck me sideways. Since when did anything in the news start making sense?
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 13:44, Reply)
This is a normal post Good. I hope they beat the living shit out of him in jail.

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 13:47, Reply)
This is a normal post
"Get him, Rolf!"
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 14:04, Reply)
This is a normal post It's a shame someone hasn't beaten the living shit out of him in the street

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 15:21, Reply)
This is a normal post He'll get off.
Sadly.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 14:03, Reply)
This is a normal post Like a crywank?
Well if he does get put away he'll definitely get off sadly - I reckon he'll be less than joyous about all the involuntary orgasms caused by all those men's pork swords poking at his prostate.

Apologies for the mental images that conjures... don't have nightmares, do sleep well. #nickross
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 15:47, Reply)
This is a link post Live tube strike swearing map

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 13:09, Reply)
This is a normal post That's pretty cool

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 13:29, Reply)
This is a normal post
Wha...?

"Chris Hyndman Knows a sexy raver that farts butts"
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 13:50, Reply)
This is a normal post What's all this about sexy ravers?

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 13:59, Reply)
This is a link post Insane forest fire in california
Is so vast it creates its own weather system that produces wind that fans the fire in all directions.

Pyrocumulus cloud that rises then collapses on itself, producing enormous strong winds.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 13:09, Reply)
This is a normal post sounds typical of one of my erections
#sigh
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 15:18, Reply)
This is a normal post "enormous strong wind"
Sounds "fun"
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 15:39, Reply)
This is a link post No good deed goes unpunished.
Cop frees skunk from yoghurt container stuck on its head. What happened next will blow your mind.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 12:48, Reply)
This is a link post "Mouth Feel"
Wankers.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 12:40, Reply)
This is a normal post
There are plenty of wealthy people who've run out of things to spend their easy earned money on. Fair play if you can capitalise on that.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 12:50, Reply)
This is a normal post You can already buy mountain air in a can too.
There's a customer born every minute.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 13:08, Reply)
This is a normal post Anything that takes money from rich people and puts it back into circulation is a good thing.

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 14:40, Reply)
This is a normal post A very good point

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 15:21, Reply)
This is a link post Re: that crane toppling over in Holland
New footage has emerged. Keep your eye on the chap mending the pavement next to the blue smart. Talk about a close shave.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 12:21, Reply)
This is a normal post I like the bit where the dust obscures everything.

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 12:28, Reply)
This is a normal post It's like a more pleasant, regional version of 9/11

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 12:36, Reply)
This is a normal post best use of 9/11 in a sentence yet
....and there has been many
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 12:57, Reply)
This is a normal post What would you rate it?

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 13:05, Reply)
This is a normal post
Nine out of eleven?
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 13:52, Reply)
This is a normal post 11 out of 9
'merican idiot
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 14:20, Reply)
This is a normal post De winkels ook weer open
Does this mean he pissed his pants?
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 12:39, Reply)
This is a normal post
pissed shat.
It means the shops are open for business.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 12:55, Reply)
This is a normal post "fucking bus was late, got a bollocking from my boss and I have to repair this shitty pavement
how can this day get any worse?"
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 13:16, Reply)
This is a normal post
I think God is punishing us because of the geys and their canal parade at the weekend.
nos.nl/artikel/2050451-grote-brand-in-loods-tilburg.html
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 13:42, Reply)
This is a link post CELEBRITY GOSS ALERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!11
Kermit the Frog & Miss Piggy announce separation after “thoughtful consideration and considerable squabbling”.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 12:09, Reply)
This is a normal post Again?
It's the kids I feel sorry for.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 12:15, Reply)
This is a normal post All those little frigs.

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 12:24, Reply)
This is a normal post Oh fucksticks.
What kind of spastic links to facebook on here!?
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 12:26, Reply)
This is a normal post
sorry for
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 14:17, Reply)
This is a link post Story about cats.
Daily Mash article (sorry, but it really has had me chuckling)
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 10:44, Reply)
This is a normal post Haha

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 10:46, Reply)
This is a normal post don't be sorry
be proud
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 10:47, Reply)
This is a normal post
“You can’t just run at another cat and start fucking it up, this isn’t WWE wrestling or something.”
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 11:10, Reply)
This is a link post Work out how many calories you'll burn walking home tonight
373 in my case.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 9:50, Reply)
This is a normal post 57120
I live in Edinburgh....
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 10:04, Reply)
This is a normal post That's a bitch of a commute

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 10:07, Reply)
This is a normal post cheaper than living in London

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 10:52, Reply)
This is a normal post 12153 calories.
According to this site. That is how much I would burn walking from London to where I live.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 10:48, Reply)
This is a normal post
Either you're very fat and live in London, or you live in Leicester, Norwich or Bristol, as a guess
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 11:12, Reply)
This is a normal post Tonight will be alright
Tomorrow, I'm meant to get a morning train from Kings Cross to ooop North, then I'm not getting back till about 8 at night, so I'll probably end up walking home from Kings Cross in the evening after a few cans of Stella and some crisps on the train.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 10:06, Reply)
This is a normal post Having a long weekend
North London grinds to a stand still when the tube's broken. I should just about manage to get home tonight before our comrades go to the pub
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 10:13, Reply)
This is a normal post
yeah!! Labour's broken Britain! oh wait...
You are playing the game of copying posts from the Daily Fail without quotes?
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 11:05, Reply)
This is a normal post ?
I said i'm not bothering to go to work tomorrow because North London can't cope without the tube, and should just about manage to get home tonight before the tube workers go on strike and go to the pub
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 11:18, Reply)
This is a normal post during a tube strike
I love the confused office workers wandering around like the walking dead, staring into google maps & unable to locate their offices. Tube strikes are great - for a lot of people I guess it's the first time they have to consider the geography of where they live, rather than popping up from underground like a fucking lemming.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 13:06, Reply)
This is a normal post Lemmings use public transport now?
Was this one of the features they added in the 3d version?
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 13:30, Reply)
This is a normal post yes
yes they do
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 13:43, Reply)
This is a normal post i work from home
getting fatter daily
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 11:11, Reply)
This is a normal post I bet you've got a right arm
like Popeye
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 11:39, Reply)
This is a normal post
hahahah
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 11:48, Reply)
This is a normal post what I did to begin with
was left some dumbbells on the landing. Lifted them a few times each time I passed, or some squats etc.
It becomes habit and takes next to no time, so you don't get too bored.
You start seeing results and makes you want to do more.

voila, got down to 9 and a half stone last year, but up to 10 stone and a bit now.
EDIT: damn, it posted twice, I deleted one without thinking and reply has now gone :(
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 12:54, Reply)
This is a normal post Do they do a version for Stephen Hawkins or wayne rainey

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 11:24, Reply)
This is a normal post Mornington Crescent!

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 11:43, Reply)
This is a normal post If I was to walk home, the most direct way takes me on the A3 and M25.
Does anyone know if it's safer to walk on the central reservation or hard shoulder? Should I walk facing the traffic or with it?
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 12:13, Reply)
This is a normal post If you listen to cyclists
The safest place is right in the middle of the lane.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 12:16, Reply)
This is a normal post Now plug your new show on Amazon Prime.

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 12:24, Reply)
This is a normal post It'll be the best show...
...
..
.




In the world.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 13:06, Reply)
This is a normal post Don't worry none of the traffic is moving so it can't hit you

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 12:21, Reply)
This is a link post A positive cannabis story in the Mail? *Jaw / Desk combo*
In other news i've just found out that certain strains of cannabis can be legally grown here.
High CBD low THC breeds are now approved.

Not sure how this works with the misuse of the drugs act because I thought that had a blanket ban on all Cannabinoids. Yet amazon is flooded with CBD oil (see charlotte's web in the states).
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 9:33, Reply)
This is a normal post
I assume these scientists work for the legalise cannabis brigade, and also claim its not addictive, its a load of codswallop and I wonder just how many of those they "followed" are on the level, they will eventually legalise cannabis and it will open the flood gates to a generation of the lost, which future Dr,s and scientists will be asking for it to be illegal again because of all the health problems it is causing, but hey lets encourage todays lack of parental guidance and disciplined youth to use it, lets just say for myself I'm glad I'm getting old an dwont be around when they eventually mature at around 40, but I feel sorry for my kids and their families
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 9:56, Reply)
This is a normal post Bit of an overlooked point is...
They're big ,fuck off untipped cornetto type roll-ups. So, that in itself is a great reason not to legalise.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 10:06, Reply)
This is a normal post What a waste of one's life to do study on cannabis. Might as well blog or write for Cosmopolitan.

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 10:07, Reply)
This is a normal post You're just bitter because you're losing the bet :)
And now there's actually been some proper scientific work into that plant over the past two decades instead of the home office saying "drugs are bad" new medicines and therapeutic techniques for previously untreatable conditions are being found.

Sounds a tad more worthy than being a writer for Cosmo.

[edit]
I see you are playing a game, you bummer.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 10:29, Reply)
This is a normal post I've forgotten the bet. What was it?
Anecdotally: It's been effectively decriminalised in Bristol: I think the police have been told that their efforts are best directed elsewhere. The city centre stinks of grass & I've often noticed people smoking whilst passing police officers.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 10:45, Reply)
This is a normal post The bet was the cannabis would be available legally in the UK within the term of this parliment.
Depending on various definitions it's already won but i'm happy to let it pass.

There's been a few police forces effectively decriminalizing it around the country recently.
May's not come out with a hard line "drugs are bad" statement.

Interesting things appear to be happening, I suspect tax revenue on fags are way down and they're looking for a new tax crop.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 10:57, Reply)
This is a normal post You seem awfully upset about a hypothetical thing that wouldn't even affect you.
How much better the world would be if we didn't have anyone who supported a ban on something that other people do without harming each other.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 10:18, Reply)
This is a normal post ^TALKING 'BOUT BUMMING
col & I are playing the "quote the comments without speech marks" game, btw.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 10:28, Reply)
This is a normal post Ah right... I just saw the one you were quoting.
Now I feel very silly indeed.
...In that case I'll pick my favourite response.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 10:30, Reply)
This is a normal post I wouldn't he got me too.
Which is disturbing on many levels.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 10:31, Reply)
This is a normal post hahahahahaaa

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 12:46, Reply)
This is a normal post
"No more of that daft nonsense from you please!"
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 10:31, Reply)
This is a normal post God what a tedious fucking debate
who gives a shit really? Legal, not legal, who cares. It just fucking boring now.
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 9:59, Reply)
This is a normal post You cared enough to post.
Thank you for your contribution. :)
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 10:24, Reply)
This is a normal post More surprising is the mail running a "something not causing cancer" story

(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 13:09, Reply)
This is a normal post The mail running a "something not causing cancer" story causes cancer.
(I read that in the mail once)
(, Wed 5 Aug 2015, 13:32, Reply)

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