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My best birthday so far was my 30th, when I held a Polish Bear Hunting evening in some woods - everyone dressed up in hunting gear, ate a Polish hunting stew round a big fire and then, armed with torches, ran out to find the foil-wrapped chocolate bears I'd hidden in the trees.

My worst so far was my first at university - my birthday was the first official day of term, so I thought there'd be loads of people there to have fun with. No, Cambridge is so posh nobody actually turns up on the first night. I got very drunk with the barman.

What extremes of birthdays have you had?

(, Fri 9 Dec 2005, 11:07)
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Memories, or lack of
Best - My 24th. Got sod all from my family. My friends however got me loads of silly presents and took me out everynight of the week getting pissed. Ending up in Leeds on my actual birthday and getting even more pissed. Cheers guys!

Worst - My 21st. Went out in town with my parents. Met up with exteemly twatted gf who slapped my in front of my family and dumped me. Then collapsed in a blubbering heap out side the pub as my sister threatened to rip her head off. Sorted it all out in the end, but she was not liked much after that.
(, Mon 12 Dec 2005, 10:25, Reply)
best birthday ever
Went to see some bands for my 16th at the Barwon Club in Geelong. The police turned up and a there was a bit of a riot,,

I ended up sleeping in the loading bay at the Belmonont K-Mart..
(, Mon 12 Dec 2005, 9:49, Reply)
five years later (than my last story, below)...
my friends sent me off to my boyfriend's house, where I was to hang out while they decorated for the least-surprising surprise party ever.

Only the real surprise was the half-naked girl asleep in my boyfriend's bed when I got there.

Kudos to him for at least offering a lame excuse and then waiting a week before dumping me, instead of doing it right on my birthday. Cunt.
(, Mon 12 Dec 2005, 5:40, Reply)
bad for me, worse for them
I was sitting in school on my birthday when the principal came in and whispered something to the teacher. Then they wheeled a TV into the room and turned it on so we could watch the news. The space shuttle Challenger had blown up on my birthday.

I guess I can't complain, since there are at least seven other people who had a worse time than I did that day.
(, Mon 12 Dec 2005, 5:34, Reply)
19th smash up
2 Years Ago, i turned 19, and being 19, i wanted to get 'wankered' with mates to celebrate. after phoning at least 20 people, only 2 came out. Anyways, off out for a night in Torquay. The pubbing and clubbing was all fairly run of the mill, like any other saturday night, and after some unsuccesful attempts with the ladies, decided to call it a night. Walking back through town my friend spots the most amazing looking girl he has ever seen, and runs up to what looks like her boyfriend, and complements him on his gorgeous missus. "oh, shes not my missus" he replies "im gay". Fantastic. So after some chatting they invite the three of us back to their flat in town. When we arrive, her flat mate heads to bed, and the gay chap dissapears. We all have a sit down and a chat, and this girl is getting very horny, and goes to get changed. While sitting down i noticed a pirate copy of the most recent lord of the rings film lying on the coffee table. 5 Minutes later the girl appears not wearing an awful lot and invites us to play 'naked pick up sticks'. At this point i began to feel uncomfortable, and suggest leaveing to my friend. They agree, we get her number, and off we go. When we get in the taxi, my friends ask why the hell i just decided to leave, and, from my sleeve, i pull a pirate dvd. It was a spur of the moment thing (plus i hadnt seen it!). So they moan at me, and we head back to my house. A little while later my mobile rings to tell me i have a message. Open the message to find a picture of the girl from earlier, naked with her flatmate, frigging each other off.

Fantastic. Pirate films and porn. the best presents for any teenagers birthday

My worst Birthday was my 10th, when my mum forced to me to invite the unpopular, stink of piss, goofy, goggle eyed, cunt of a twat. He thought it would be funny to phone the police and blame it on me. the police turned up and gave me the second biggest bollocking of my life. (The first biggest being when my then best mate phoned the old bill up and reported me for riding a stolen motorcycle on public land....he'd stolen it by the way!)

(excuse the length and girth)
(, Mon 12 Dec 2005, 1:16, Reply)
for the last five years, on every single birthday I was moving (house, office). I didn't plan for it, it just turned out like this.

(Five years ago, I moved to a new house with my girlfriend.
A year later, I started my company and moved into my first office.
Another year later, I'm moving office to another part of town.
Another year later, I'm moving out of said office (okay, this was the day before my birthday, but the boxes and the mess weren't gone by then), now working at home.
Last year, I moved into another house.

I'm really looking forward to celebrating my birthday in February without piles of boxes as the only available furniture.

I wonder if I will ever be able to celebrate a normal birthday, without the urge to pick up boxes all the time or eating cake from a plastic plate...
(, Sun 11 Dec 2005, 23:39, Reply)
On my 25th birthday my friend tried to wipe out a village....
I visited some family in Switzerland, and was taken to a breathtaking national park on the day of my birthday. Whilst we were gazing up the Matterhorn we noticed some small tumblings of snow. Followed by some bigger ones. Followed by the biggest landslide in a hell of a long time in Swiss history. Basically it changed scenery. My Swiss cousin tried to claim he was a close friend of various landslidy gods, but I didn't care. For my birthday that year I watched a mountain shed its skin. And it ruled.
(, Sun 11 Dec 2005, 22:19, Reply)
18th Birthday
Spent the day before in the Vancouver airport for 10 hours waiting for a 12 minute flight across the strait to come home. There was a delay because the lower bloody mainland can't handle two inches of snow. Flew into Nanaimo (which is two hours up island from my uni, and where my parents live)was pleasantly surprised to go out for dinner with two of my three brothers (one whom I hadn't seen for ages). After dinner, we're on the way back to the house and my brother goes, "So mom, you gonna tell her?"

After ages of me demanding to be told whatever it is they're keeping from me, my mom regales this tale of a lodger in our house. Since us four kids moved out and away, the basement's been empty at the ol' homestead, so my parents rent it out. One of their regular boarders buggered off to Winnipeg for the month of December, but couldn't afford to pay the rent while he was gone. So my step-dad agreed to let his friend say there while the other guy was gone, as his friend Mark had just moved to town and was looking for a place to stay. He seemed like a normal kinda guy. The last time my parents saw him was the middle of December, around the 20th. Then just after the 1st of January, my step-dad went downstairs to look for something, and smelled something weird. THE GUY HAD DIED TWO WEEKS PREVIOUS.So there were cops and crime scene guys swarming the house, the professional cleaners were in and such. This all happened two days before I got home.

Totally gave me the jibblies, I still can't go downstairs in the middle of the night. But that wasn't all that was bad. The next morning, I get up early to catch a bus back down to uni. Didn't manage to make it on the too-full express bus (which takes 2 hours tops), so I had to take the other one which meanders all the fuck around the island and pushes the travel time nearly to 4 hours. Three hours go by, we're nearly home. But wait. There's a huge accident. We got stuck in traffic for an additional 3 hours. My trip pushed 7 hours total. Whatever, I've been through worse, I can handle it. So I get off at the bus depot downtown, and as I'm waiting to cross the street, my transit bus up to uni passes. No big deal, I can catch the next one. I check the schedule, says I've got 20 minutes to wait. I can do that. 20 minutes pass, 30, 40, AN HOUR AND A HALF pass. Still no bus.

The problem? It had snowed like six inches. See, I'm originally from northern BC, where it snows like... six feet in a good blizzard and the schools don't close until it hits -40 celcius. But my uni is in the much balmier lower mainland, where -5 celcius and six inches of snow, is a Big Fucking Deal. Finally my bus came and I lugged all my shit onboard. As I was finding a seat, my cell phone started to ring. I didn't find it in time to pick up, and for some reason, this was the last straw. I huddled in the back crying and checking my voicemail. It was my bestest friend leaving me a happy birthday message.

I got up to campus and dumped my shit in my room, planning on making my next class (it was the first day of classes), but said 'screw it' and crawled into bed.

My day was made a bit better when my roommate's boyfriend took me out for dinner and a movie, and unlike the previous year's birthday, no one in my family died. (My grandma died on my 17th birthday, when I was as sick as a dog with the flu).

Sorry about the length. Naw, not really.
(, Sun 11 Dec 2005, 22:12, Reply)
not at home
for my 16th birthday, i was in new york with family. it was great. i went up the empire state building and generally did touristy things.

for my 17th, i was shivering in a tent in buxton. my birthday is in february, so needless to say the tent froze solid. grrr...
(, Sun 11 Dec 2005, 20:39, Reply)
Last one was great cause Reid was there.
I had a good party which involved paintballing.

I shot my brother several times at close range, we were on the same team. The fucker was an idiot.
(, Sun 11 Dec 2005, 19:15, Reply)
i can't remember any of mine
(, Sun 11 Dec 2005, 19:01, Reply)
on my fourth birthday
our house got struck by lightning. at my party, we'd been playing sardines, and had all gone into the dining room for cake and the like, and the storm started up. sarah b started crying, we thought it was cos she was a wuss but it was cos her postman pat hat fell off. it hit the chimney stack, and loads of my brother's bedroom wall fell in, covering where a few of us had been hiding about ten minutes earlier.

i have a photo of me with a fireman and a huge smile :)

*message board cherry popped*
(, Sun 11 Dec 2005, 18:37, Reply)
my birthday isnt until tomorrow but i had my party last night.
djing ur own party - may seem like a stupid idea, but its SO MUCH FUN!
only problem was... enjoying the music and alcohol at the same time causes one to convulse in a manner known as 'headbanging'.
when you are djing at the time, you are liable to have metal objects in front of you (cd players/decks/whatever) and if you're not careful and/or pissed then collisions may occur.
i would not give this warning if it weren't for the inevitable: one did.
hurt like fuck upon collision, skipped the cd so fucked with everyones rhythm and i was standing there holding my head for quite a while, before feeling that my hand was worryingly moist.
turned round to look at my mate, cue response of 'fucking hell' and a quick dash to the toilet to inspect the damage.
one side of my face was absolutely covered in blood and i couldnt help but laugh, which is odd because i hadn't reached the 'PAIN IS NOTHING. I AM IMMORTAL' stage of being wrecked.
so all in all a good laugh was had, but now tomorrow on my real 18th, i have to go into college looking like harry bleedin' potter...
darn tootin...
(or in h. potter style 'oh bother')
(, Sun 11 Dec 2005, 17:37, Reply)
Sobbed all day
Woke up on my 23rd birthday to find my wonderful Grandma had died in the night. Opened her card. It just said 'Love you, darling; have a lovely life'.
(, Sun 11 Dec 2005, 16:40, Reply)
Fifteenth birthday?
I saw the Village while pissed and Chronicles of Riddick while hung over, and I think I got that the wrong way around. Not to mention a semi-party in Camden and losing my virginity.

Sixteenth birthday? Shite. Went to London with three friends, none of whom knew each other. Nobody broke the ice all day. Bollocks.

Seventeenth? I'm going to invite EVERYONE, EVER.
(, Sun 11 Dec 2005, 15:47, Reply)
Worst one
has to be my 21st. S'posed to be a big celebration normally, but oh no. My birfday is the week after New Year, so no one got any cash. This was the problem I had. Not only did I have no cash at all, I had no bread/milk/tea/tobacco/weed. So I sat on my sofa bored, hungry and in need of some sort of nicotine fix ALL FUCKING DAY! Even a cuppa would have been nice. Still the £50 in a birfday card arrived the next day, typical!
(, Sun 11 Dec 2005, 12:22, Reply)
Oh the difference a year makes...
21st Birthday - fantastic. Spent it in a national park in California, being best man at my brother's wedding. I cried with joy during the ceremony. All the women at the wedding liked the cute 21 year old boy from England, but I didn't act upon my new found popularity as I had a fantastic girlfriend. I was also having a great time at Uni, having made some really good friends that year. I was also about to start my year long industrial placement - my first real job - the world was my oyster! This was it! Finally, life was not turning out to not be an infinitely wide excruciating swimming pool of misery that I couldn't find my way out of. Life was, to be succinct, very good.

22nd Birthday - oh well. Girlfriend dumped me. Was in the midst of a year long industrial placement, doing a job I hated, living with people I hated, in a town I hated - Basingstoke. Spent it in my room, drinking, by myself. I think I probably cried, but this time out of despair. Oh, and got a card from the ex saying "hope you get everything you want!"...yup, I can safely say that I don't quite think that I got everything I wanted, but hey, I got a card so it can't be all bad!

I've finally escaped Amazingstoke and have returned to University. I am a lot happier, but being final year student, I don't have the time for a life, but at least I have friends and I can leave the house to go out and get drunk sometimes. Now have an intense, burning fear of getting a job and entering the real world, as I can tell it will be quite, quite terrible.
(, Sun 11 Dec 2005, 11:55, Reply)
Astro Boy
I once tried to break dance to the Astro Boy theme music on the kitchen floor. All because my housemates took me to the pub for my birthday and got me pissed as ten men.

Not sure if that made it a good birthday or a bad one. You be the judge.
(, Sun 11 Dec 2005, 1:44, Reply)
My worst birthday was my Fourteenth
The night before, my dad had gotten very drunk, and assaulted a classmate of mine who was being a cunt (a gobby chav homeboy, you should have seen him crying like a big girl on my doorstep) That was the day he had to go to the station and beg for mercy etc. The shouting and fighting at home was pretty bad too.

as for me, I stayed in and watched Pink Floyd - The Wall, no party, lazy cunts.
(, Sat 10 Dec 2005, 23:11, Reply)
Ruined holiday *and* birthday
My Grandma decided to die while we were on holiday in France, and I spent my 12th birthday driving back for the funeral

Best birthday? Maybe 19th - my mum took me to Iceland for the day on the day before, and on the birthday itself my Dad came out of hospital having been in for a couple of weeks
(, Sat 10 Dec 2005, 21:30, Reply)
30th birthday
Last year was a fantastically good year for me in a lot of respects, and my 30th birthday seemed like a good excuse for a party.

There's a bar I'm a regular at quite near Disneyland, and it's attached to a hotel so I hired their function room. I hired a DJ/Karaoke, caterers and got my singing teachers band to play. It was costing a lot of money, but I thought sod it, you're only 30 once, right?

The big day arrives, so my husband (boyfriend at the time) had arranged a trip to the spa for me and a couple of my girlfriends, we then had a very drunken girly lunch, and I went off to the hairdressers to have my hair and nails done.
As the hotel had given me a free room (as I was a bar regular), I got dolled up for my big night.

Everyone came, my singing teachers band started playing some lovely jazz and she then announced that if I sang, the band would waive their fee. I'd never sung in public before, but agreed to it. I was terrified, but went down an absolute storm - especially considering I'd never sung with a band, either!

Then everyone got drunk, and did lots of dancing and karaoke and ate lots of food and I got lots of lovely presents! Most of hubby's family didn't know I took singing lessons, and they were gobsmacked! I felt like a queen!

At about 9:30pm, Disneyland did it's nightly fireworks show, so we all went outside to watch the fireworks. It was ace.

At the end of the night, I go to pay the DJ and he gave me half off his regular price as he'd made about $150 in tips!
I went to pay the food and function room bill, and the manager told me that one of the other bar regulars had paid for it!

All in all, it was a great night :)

Then on my birthday this year I got the phone call that my grandad had died. Still partied hard though - it's what grandad would have wanted!
(, Sat 10 Dec 2005, 18:43, Reply)
at the time of my 18th i sported a skinhead
foolish amounts of gin, whisky and beer (mmm, good call) led to me vomiting copiously on my friends' shoes, before falling asleep in the town square. apparently, a "friend" held a flaming lighter to my scalp in an attempt to wake me. he failed. the first i knew was shaving my head again the next day and wondering what the sore spot was about.

not the best, not the worst, just sticks in my mind...
(, Sat 10 Dec 2005, 17:51, Reply)
my 18th :(
my 'best' friend kissed my (now ex!) boyfriend about two feet away from me on my 18th birthday. we don't talk much anymore...
(, Sat 10 Dec 2005, 17:49, Reply)
My 20th is by far the most, well, most. I got taken out by friends, quite literally- 6 stellas and four tequilas and a star-trek moment from where one minute I was in the Walkabout- next I knew I was being thrown out of the Vodka Revolution for being too drunk. After vomiting copiously on the way home, I woke up with a killer hangover, and also find I had demanded sex from my ex. Not a problem, normally. Problem being, she had the painters in. Blood everywhere. Not nice.
(, Sat 10 Dec 2005, 17:38, Reply)
Short and not very sweet
My nan died on my 18th birthday.

Kinda takes the fun out of the day now. I don't celebrate it any more.
(, Sat 10 Dec 2005, 15:24, Reply)
I think one of my best was my 19th
My mum took me, my sister,stepdad,nanny and uncle out for a 'suprise' dinner which I had no idea what it was in the evening. After what felt like 2 hours driving we came across a castle. Turns out We were to have a Tudor style banquet with 5 courses which were served and ment ot be eaten traditionaly(one was just a slab of meat and potatos you had to eat with a dagger). There was entertainment, singing, and my discovery of mead. I loved the stuff and drank everyones as few of my family liked it. Fell asleep as soon as i got in the car, it was cool.
(, Sat 10 Dec 2005, 15:19, Reply)
best ever
was my 19th - coach trip to rock city in Nottingham, didnt have to pay for a drink all night, lots of free LSD, pulled a student nurse and my last memory before passing out is of being handcuffed to her bed while she blew me. Incredible :)

Worst - one of the many occasions I got so smashed the night before that i spent the entirety of my bday in bed :(
(, Sat 10 Dec 2005, 14:46, Reply)
Venice. Got off the train from Vienna that evening, nuked on the Belgian beer I'd liberated from a couple of neonazis; the moon shone over the steps down to the canal where some nut was playing a lute and fireworks were going off over the lagoon. They must've been expecting me. It was *gorgeous*.
(, Sat 10 Dec 2005, 14:30, Reply)
the last decent birthday i had was when i was 12, cant remember what i did, but it has to have been better than these 3.
on my 13th, my mum had topped herself about a month before so i didnt really feel up for, well, anything (cheers mum).
for my 16th i was told i could leave home just because i didnt want to talk to my dad about the fact that my friend andrew had just killed himself. i think you'll agree that his making me feel like it was my fault his girlfriend was about to leave him, even tho it was because he was beating her, is reason enough to not want to talk to him.
my 18th, was meant to be going out for a nice dinner with a load of school friends once school had started again (boarding school+ birthday in the easter hols=faff), they ALL bailed on me. went to a restaurant on the actual day, and the waitress got my order wrong, so i was really hungry, and everyone else was tucking in. at least no-one had died. eh?
20th, told the now-ex (cnut cnut cnut) that it was going to be fancy dress a MONTH before the party. 3 hours after he's supposed to have arrived i ring him and he's only just started his costume (cnut cnut cnut).
it seems to be that i'm having 3 do's for my 21st, so one of them HAS to be good, right? right?
(, Sat 10 Dec 2005, 14:02, Reply)

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