A couple of years ago
Slept on the roundabout outside the 24 hour Tesco in Exeter, in the bush.

I was eventually woken up by a huge delivery lorry driving past at about 5am.
(McFlu, Sun 31 Dec 2006, 1:40, Reply)

No-one will notice
I have become a dab-hand at discovering empty offices and at one place I worked, would regulalry lock myself into one and lie on the floor for after-lunch 40 winks.

I was working on a contract in Whitehall and failed to find an empy office anywhere, so had to resort to the split paperclips on the floor trick (drop them over the floor and put your feet against the door while you kip so it looks as if you're picking them up when you get woken up) only it doesn't work if your boss can look through the door and see you sleeping!

I was at an exhibition in Madrid and by the afternoon, the late Spanish nights were catching up with me - so I crept under the stairs at the top of a stair well - but was woken by the security guard waving his pistol at me.

So the next day I went up the same stair well and then up the steps that lead to the roof emergency exit and slept with my body on the platform and legs on the stairs - I heard him doing his rounds but he didn't spot me.

Length? It was only 1/2 hour!
(Pewit does things down under, Sun 31 Dec 2006, 1:33, Reply)

School.
During my 5th, 6th and repeat Leaving Cert. school years I stayed up watching T.V. or working till 4 in the morning. With the inevitable result of me falling asleep in various classes.

1. Some classes were good for a snooze most notably Accountancy, as I slept through about 2 and a half years of classes and still managed to pass the subject!
2. All the classes with new female teachers I had, I managed to bluff my way out of trouble by being so blunt about being asleep they could only laugh (Fell off a stool backward in the Biology lab, Tipped my chair backward in Maths, fell asleep and toppled over.)

I managed to get B's, C's and a D in the seven subjects I took despite suffering severe narcolepsy. \0/
( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Sun 31 Dec 2006, 1:19, Reply)

A few...
In my local the night after our 6th year prom. The prom night had been a complete disaster, no parties, very little alcohol so we resolved to get completely shitfaced. I managed to stagger to the toilet and puke, sit down, and promptly fall asleep.

Mates thinking I was no longer in the pub left, and the upstairs bar, where I was, shut at 1am.

So I wake up, in a vodka haze, in the complete dark. After a minute or so thinking I was blind, I realised my predicament and started trying to get out. All the windows of the pub were open but it was a good 15-20 foot drop to the ground below.

Luckily for me, the pub was owned by the father of a friend of mine. After having tried her phone number (no answer, asleep) I decided to bite the bullet and phone her home number. Her dad answered, and whether it was through benevolence or tired confusion agreed to get someone to come to the pub to let me out.

I later found out that I had been very lucky. The only reason the alarms didnt go off was due to the staff having a lock in in the other half of the bar downstairs. If it had, I'd have been dealing with police, my parents, and last but not least, my friends dad, as he'd be in a bit of shit for allowing under 18s in the bar.

Ive started so I'll finish.
In the middle of a field during sunday t in the park, missing all bands that day, wearing nothing but shorts and a parade jacket.

Breakfast bar in my kitchen.

Under a pile of jackets at a houseparty, again, abandonned by my mates thinking id fucked off.

In the middle of a roundabout after working 18 hours on the bar at our student union.
(himseelf, Sun 31 Dec 2006, 1:19, Reply)

Outside the heaters at xscape in milton keynes
with some tramps. we were so fucked we didn't care. the tramps were quite nice about it, we even were sticking up for them when soimeone through a bit of half eaten kfc at one of them. that's respect that is...

other places include in a park, under one of the grand union canal bridges and on a glass table. madness indeed.
( Grundlebiscuit, Sun 31 Dec 2006, 0:26, Reply)

fetus?
i'm an architecture student, so i can basically sleep anywhere at any time to catch up from not sleeping for days on end

i have been known to fall asleep sitting, standing, walking, in conversations, praying in front of large groups, or even using power tools

strangest yet:

i fell asleep one time in my studio (entirely usual), and upon standing up off the floor i saw, out the window, a 15'-0" tall, bloody, dead fetus

thought i was dreaming, but it turned out to be an abortion protest on the lawn
(meltthefork, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 23:53, Reply)

woooooo!
I have spent many hours sleeping in ghostly houses, and never once - ONCE- has anything odd happened to me or my friends. To relieve the boredom, alcohol is frequently used. I once slept in one of the most haunted bedrooms in the UK - the Bishops Room at the Ancient Ram Inn in Wootton. Not a sodding thing happened.

If you're interested (yawn!), do a search for "Memoirs of a ghost hunter" and you'll find the barrels of fun we had looking for those spooks.
(Wrecked Tums, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 23:35, Reply)

World Headquarters
Years ago in a club in Newcastle called World Headquarters (back in the day when it was tiny and near the gay quarter), I was found about 2' away from a large set of speakers stood up fast asleep.
( CowJam, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 23:25, Reply)

rubbish
well i went to a party at my friends because someone left 7
teenagers in a house with alcohol and when we all decided to go to
sleep at about 6 am i thought it would be a fantastic idea to sleep
in a cardboard box that i found in the garage.

a few hours later some man woke me
up and i was at the top
of the street still inside the box next to loads of wheelie bins.

so i got up and went home.
they all went to the tip looking for me.
(i eat crayons, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 23:19, Reply)

A campsite
I came back from a day of pub crawling and riverside weed toking in bakewell with some mates.

very well toasted, I accidentally managed to crawl into the porch of some girl duke of edinburgh campers tent, and konked out half poking out.

I was luckily awoken at about 4 am by my friend who snuck me back to our tent before they got up to found me there.
(bonzos, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 23:04, Reply)

Maybe I drink to much?
In a ditch, in the middle of what would politely be described as the arse-end of bumfuck; several miles from the nearest town or village and the roads had grass up the middle. Not sure what happened there.

In the middle of a two man tent, this may not sound very strange but there were at least 4 other people in the tent piled in a jenga style (I was second from bottom) and two of them were getting 'friendly'.

On a sofa, this was odd as I my bed was the otherside of the room and I had been sober. What was odder was that my feet were on the sofa and my head was on the floor.

Outside a friends bathroom - I'm saving this story for a QotW called when booze and drugs attack. Suffice to say I now have a phobia of bendy straws and shaving foam.

I've also slept on cars, under cars, in bus stations, train stations, flower beds, in a chrstmas tree (I mean in it and about 4ft up), in caves, swimming pools, bent over a fence (one of those cheap B&Q wooden panel jobs), on my unconcious housemate (she didn't appreciate it), in the cats basket, under a park bench (the person on the bench kept the rain off) and a few more I'm sure.

Length? I wish it was this long in real life..
(lankymike, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 22:43, Reply)

In the Science Museum
when I was about 8. I had a plane of some sort hanging over me and couldn't sleep for fear that it might fall on me.
( Madam Marlboro wonders if you've found her yet, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 22:25, Reply)

In the doghouse
In my youth (ok so about six months ago) I stumbled home drunk and discovered that I was (for about the tenth time in as many nights out) without my key. My dear family, highly unimpressed by the frequent interruptions to their sleep all decided to ignore me as they had left the back door open. In my drunkenness I failed to think of this and made an alternative plan. I went into the back garden to the shed where the 9 strong litter of springer spaniels (8 weeks old and hyper) were housed. I curled up on a patch of wood not covered with puppy urine and awoke the next morning with my sister standing over on me with a look of disgust like I've never seen before nor will ever see again.
(Stephington I used to be nostalgic...back in the good old days, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 21:53, Reply)

My loss...
I fell asleep while receiving a blow job. Does that count?
(svenenuponwherepops, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 21:41, Reply)

Well, either
a horrendously uncomfortable folding chair in a squalid, freezing squat located in a village just beside the back of beyond.

And I mean literally freezing; when I awoke at around 3am my vomit had frozen to my face and needed to be chipped off. The idiot owners had locked me in and left but a crappy knitted blanket to stave off death by exposure, so I broke a window to escape, stealing a 2 litre bottle of gin on my way out. I walked the 5 miles home through fields, thickets and scary woods in some of the thickest fog known to man, with only my phone's crappy LED light to guide me.

It was that or in the boughs of a dead tree, on top of a small mountain which had hosted a good friend's 18th. What launched it into the realms of the genuinely surreal was the fact that I'd attempted to pitch my tent in said tree, failed, and simply used the groundsheet as a makeshift blanket. That and noting that some joker had tied various prophylactics (most of them used) to my tree's branches. Lovely sight first thing in the morning.

Quality not quantity(!)
(SurferRosa causing the lamentation of the womenfolk since, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 21:31, Reply)

In Shoreditch...
...at my own stag do.

they taped a pint glass to my hand and dragged me along to the races, a few pubs and then the obligatory lap dancing club.

It was a long, hard day and i apparently fell asleep while a really hot stripper wriggled her cute tight little bum in my heavily reduced field of vision.

I don't know if she still works there. Or at all.
( bierbelly, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 20:41, Reply)

The New Forest ...in winter
Me and me mates thought it was a good idea* to go camping in the New Forest in the middle of winter.

*May be a bad idea

All went well, we had a campfire, guitar and alcohol... Infact some of us had rather too much alcohol (there's always one), more specifically, me. I think by the end of the night, I polished off an entire bottle of baileys, a few beers and some absynth mmmm.

Normally, I'd be dead to the world after this amount of happy juice but it was that damn cold that I still felt kinda sober...

Anyway, everyone crept off to bed and I snuggled into my sleeping bag which felt rather warm at the time.

Skip forward to sunrise and things are a little different... A mist had enveloped the site we had chosen to pitch our tents on, a frost had formed on those little lumps of grass you get in the New Forest, it was bitterly cold and i had no feeling in my toes, my head was spinning and I could see a nasty hangover on the horizon, but this wasn't out-of-the-ordinary, the weird thing was the ponies SURROUNDING OUR TENTS...

As you can imagine, a large group of ponies (20 or so) investigating our tents kinda freaked me out at the time.

Didn't really have much time to think about it though cos I had to make a quick trip to the woods and I didn't really care what stood in my way...

After much chundering and finding new uses for leaves the ponies had left us for more interesting things like the frozen lake...

Anyway kids I learnt that night that alcohol doesn't warm you up, infact it makes you colder... especially in the morning! And, I also learnt that ponies are strange, fickle beasts...


I don't appologise for anything, I am perfect in every respect*

*may be complete tosh
( monkeyman, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 20:20, Reply)

In a mate's mum's bed
With another male. That was an interesting night. At one point at about 2am, two thugs pulled up outside the house. We shat ourselves thinking they were coming to do us in (no parents around, just 4 16 year old lads, all fannies). We never found out what happened, but it turns out I hog the sheets.

Wank.
( Flowers the little boy that santa claus forgot, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 20:18, Reply)

woah, a QotW that i actually have an anecdote for
the strangest place i have ever slept?
the millenium dome. fo' real.
and i dont mean i fell asleep in that relaxation room thing either, this was after it closed. i slept there for 2 nights in a row, in a sleeping bag on the concrete floor with thousands of peaceniks and hippys (sharing the dome, not a sleeping bag).
i went to the ESF (european social forum) with some politically minded housemates of mine. it was over a whole weekend and the choice was: pay for a hotel in london, or sleep in the dome! so i did. yay me
( manolith hooray for me, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 20:13, Reply)

So many...
I've woken up in many many strange places.


Half way in the front door. flat on my face.

On the neighbour's car.

Outside the local shopping centre, with 40 odd pence in change around me.

In someone's living room...I still have no idea who's (I only hope that I was actually invited in)...Took me ages wandering 'round streets before i worked out I was in Gateshead.

Aswell as many more. But these are perhaps the strangest.
(NoStrings Tastes like zombies!!, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 20:06, Reply)

Sanctuary with a chunkster
Living in Barnsley with a mate who was playing in Sheffield one night and the drinks are 50p for a vodka and coke, I have a tenner. All is good, my mate says the last he remembers of me is me chatting to a girl. I vaguely recall the following, being chased out of the club and up the road by the bouncers. so much so that I was now lost without the name of the nightclub, any idea where I was, and just in a pitiful situation. I get a taxi, ask the driver to take me to the club which 'plays hip hop' and get driven round for five minutes. Give him a fiver for the priviledge and stagger into the city centre.

Sit down by a Mac D's, head in my hands, quietly weeping when a girl comes over. She informs me of having an argument with her boyfriend which ended with her storming straight off for a burger. She asked of my plight, and offered a place to crash at hers. You know beer goggles? That bastard affliction whch makes heffas look like Helen Baxendale? I had Beer goggles on that night, and she still wernt all that.

So I went and done the dirty with a heffer from Halifax (hearing a fat lass with that accent cum certainly is...an experience) and eventually got my head down. I felt slightly whoreish (I had offered sexual services for shelter essentially) and more than a bit skittish that some Northern nutjob was gonna come in any minute. When I woke the following morning, I looked out of the window. The sky was Sheffield grey, the rain was straight from Manchesters wettest dream and I was on the outskirts of Sheffield on some ropey looking bastard estate with a chunk of monster snoring behind me, without a penny to my name.

Certainly felt a strange place.

Edit: floyd the grocer, I got those exact same words after the above escapade. Is it me or do you just want to swing for whoever says that to you and shake them like it's a reconstruction for the Louise Woodward trial?
(The_Greyhound wrote www.luckymcdanger.blog.co.uk on, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 19:39, Reply)

T'was Five Long Summers Ago...
Fresh from our high school's rehearsal of 'Oklahoma!', I was enjoying a few fine ales in the nearest pub. The night went on, and I threw up in the beer garden. I decided to continue my vomiting in the toilet...

...Where I awoke, dazed and confused, at roughly 3.45am. My friends assumed I'd gone home, the bar staff didn't check the toilets and the pub had been closed since 1am.

Almost all of the windows in the pub were of the 'lockable double glazed' variety and were all locked. The door was locked. I was trapped.

Then I spotted a single glazed window- one that opened out onto the road! The main problem was that it was a good 10 feet up, and I'm not tall. I pushed a table up to it, squeezed through the narrow aperture and tumbled the ten feet down onto the road.

Then ran like a bastard. Figuring I was on a roll with harmless breaking and exiting, I broke into my mate's bedroom and slept on his couch.

His words when he woke up and spotted me will stay with me forever:

"What the fuck happened to you?"

Length gag? They do.
(Generator cannot be named for legal reasons, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 19:05, Reply)

Illness = sleeping
Normally, I have a very difficult time sleeping even under the best circumstances, but when I'm sick I tend to fall asleep constantly. It's more of a passing-out sort of thing; I'm awake one moment and completely in dreamland the next.

At uni, during a bout of a particularly nasty respiratory infection, I fell asleep right at the beginning of one of my Anthropology classes.

Front row, directly facing our professor.

He was Austrian and possessed a speaking voice that could be affectionately described as 'strident', yet even that didn't stir me. I was out cold, face-down on my textbook.

Bless the man, he knew I'd been ill and told the other students not to wake me until class was over.
(louveciennes , Volvospotter, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 19:03, Reply)

This is so bad.
A few years ago I was working as a ride operator for a safari park round these parts. Absolutely wicked fun, I worked with a bunch of lovelies and because the job was so fun too, we all had a super time together, both in and out of work. So along comes my birthday, and the night before we all go out to get tremendously wrecked. Mission succesful, I got about 2 hours sleep and more jack daniels than I could possibly wish for.

However I had work the next day. I was well versed in cleaning up vomit and dealing with loud noises and children when hungover, but the sleep thing was getting to me a bit. I was running a carousel that day and the dreamy music and floating horses were oh so ever so soothing... and so I drifted off. While the ride was running, and FULL of people.

I'm still not sure how long for, and I doubt I shall ever know, but I suddenly came to, looked out my cabin window to see lots of people on the ride. Some looked very bored, but most were all staring at me. "Oops" thought I, and stopped the ride. When all the customers were getting off I had lots of "that was very long" comments and disaproving looks, but thankfully nobody complained

I dread to think what could have happened, but hey, we used to nearly kill people all the time. I once smacked a kid round the head with a metal gate and ended up getting the parents to apologise to me :)
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 18:42, Reply)

Very early one morning
Up a ladder! No really!
( Mrs Entity is in hiding., Sat 30 Dec 2006, 18:40, Reply)

On an office chair
I spent the most uncomfortable night of my life sleeping in an office.

It was in the early hours of the morning that we stepped off a delayed flight back from a group holiday. All the airport hotels were full, but as luck would have it one of the group worked in an office near heathrow (well, across a busy ringroad and through several wire fences anyway - this is with our luggage still on the trolley). We arrived there grateful to be indoors and the security guys said it was ok for us to hang out there until the morning.

I pushed two of those very uncomfortable office chairs together and attempted to sleep. Unfortunately each time I drifted off the two would part company leaving my arse hanging in mid air (they had wheels on, natch). Also, the lights couldn't be turned off so there was a fluorescent glare that was visible even through the eyelids.

We waited until the same came up and left - at 5am. Mind you, it beats sleeping under a bridge and at least there was free coffee out of the nescafe machine.
(Kazza , loathing myself so you don't have to, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 17:19, Reply)

royal courts of justice
i'm a very light sleeper, who manages about 4 hours a night and wakes up at anything. the most comfortable bed in the world and pitch black silence can have me staring up at the invisible ceiling for hours trying to drop off.

but put me in a seminar full of 400 important lawyers talking about vat implications on commercial property transactions, or a very long-winded barrister giving it some in a hearing, and i decide that's the perfect place to sleep like the dead.

the worst was a major hearing following the ladbroke grove rail disaster. most embarrassing when the barrister wanted to see my notes and they started off so well, but trailed off into nonsense about biscuits followed by wavy lines followed by nothingness...

so yes, court 1 in the royal courts of justice, mid-multi-million-pound compensation trial.

in my own defence, i am quite a good lawyer when i'm awake!!!!!!!!!!!!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 17:18, Reply)

train
I once fell asleep on a train home to Brighton, as it pulled out of Victoria station. I woke up just as it arrived back at Victoria, having been to Brighton and back again. I think that was my angriest ever moment.
( browser still relating boring anecdotes into a void on, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 17:18, Reply)

Places
After one heavy night out on the lash I got a taxi home and, not having much cash left, had to get out a mile or so from home. There were no streetlights to it was pitch black and I could see millions of stars. I lay down in a field to look at said stars (vaguely remember seeing a couple lying down near but don't think they were star-gazing). Next thing I remember was it being broad daylight I a few people walking their dogs were giving me very strange looks.

I have a bad habit of falling asleep on trains and waking up in sidings at the end of the line.

Also recently slept on the floor in Paris CDG airport.
(ComplexStuff Was confused by life on, Sat 30 Dec 2006, 16:57, Reply)

Quite a few odd spots...
Let's see... in my car on the side of the expressway, just past a bridge abuttment. (That way if there was an accident they'd hit the abuttment instead of me.)

On the dock at my parents' house, after a night of lots of alcohol.

In an odd corner of the FAB (I was in the semiconductor industry at the time, working in a cleanroom). I was working the night shift and was feeling wiped, so I went behind the protective curtain around the laser scribe and leaned against CMP-21.

The most disorienting? Waking with a massive hangover in the all-girls dormitory next to a girl I barely remembered, and trying to figure out how to get out of there without getting caught either by the dorm director or the girl in question.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Sat 30 Dec 2006, 16:39, Reply)