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an old gf video called my brother (I'm at his)
They're still talking now. What 'revelation' can i interject with that eill end the call?
(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt we of all lost both have them, Sun 15 Oct 2023, 1:18, archived)
"i am very needy"

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 15 Oct 2023, 2:10, archived)
Bollocks

(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt we of all lost both have them, Sun 15 Oct 2023, 2:58, archived)
that's a weird title for a gf video
also, what's a gf video?
(piss and shit, Sun 15 Oct 2023, 13:49, archived)
A wonderful example of the high comedy of misunderstanding something obvious. Clearly it's an old girlfriend video titled "my brother" where she shags her brother, whose name is Imathis

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 15 Oct 2023, 15:24, archived)
bollocks

(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt we of all lost both have them, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 18:53, archived)
All right Mr H

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 19:03, archived)
You would say that

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 19:13, archived)
arseboon dilbaro

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 19:15, archived)
Ah, our daily dose of vitamin bollocks

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 19:26, archived)
C and B12

(piss and shit, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 22:42, archived)
All vitamins are the same
Lol vitaminge
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 22:58, archived)
You can say "bollock it up" or "bollocks it up" and it means the same, they're fascinating things, bollocks

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 23:36, archived)
"Bollockchops" is actually an insult, not a food.

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 15 Oct 2023, 0:18, archived)
My cousin is very offended at this post, please delete.

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sun 15 Oct 2023, 0:25, archived)
Did he choke on a bollock?

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 15 Oct 2023, 0:26, archived)
Bravery depletes bollock mass. That's why when someone does something brave we say, "that took some bollocks."

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 15 Oct 2023, 0:22, archived)
Saying bollocks and talking bollocks are not always the same thing.

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 15 Oct 2023, 0:25, archived)
Yahweh Akbar!

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sun 15 Oct 2023, 0:51, archived)
Louise Glück / ran out of lück

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 14:19, archived)
still, 80 isn't bad

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 14:31, archived)
DECEASE Glück, nenne ich ihn!
I have no idea who he is but he's wearing a stripey top ?

* P A R P *
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 14:51, archived)
Tippi Hedren is still alive
just putting it out there
(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 15:59, archived)
So is Julie Christie.

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 16:06, archived)
Julie Christie / On the 'not dead' listie

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 17:00, archived)
Julie CHRIST, DIE!

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 17:03, archived)
She was so beautiful back in the day tho

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 18:48, archived)
apart from the birds
about the only thing I've seen her in is raising hope
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 16:07, archived)
Tippi Hedren / Is well m'bredren

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 16:58, archived)
Tippi HEADLESS

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 17:09, archived)
Honk bonk tweet

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 18:26, archived)
she was eighty
I think she was lucky nit to drag it out tbh
(piss and shit, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 19:24, archived)
oh comb on

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 20:09, archived)
I was pissing and I heard a shit!

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Sun 15 Oct 2023, 12:11, archived)
Fucking hell! It's Saturday.
Did you all have a lucky Friday 13th?
(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 13th Level Scrote, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 6:47, archived)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt we of all lost both have them, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 7:33, archived)
Bollocks

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 10:08, archived)
It's my lucky day

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 7:47, archived)
I am planning on having a mucky one

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 10:12, archived)
My nephew just announced his engagement
So today is a very good day
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 11:41, archived)
Cool
Make sure you catch the bouquet at the wedding
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 11:42, archived)
Fuck that
Dodged that bullet more than once
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 12:11, archived)
morning

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 8:30, archived)
Fuck you

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 10:08, archived)
Not bad
Flight was ok. Hotel nice and it’s warm and sunny here in Sicily
(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 8:48, archived)
Morning comrade
Passed without incident
Treated us to kebabs so expecting toilet time soon
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 9:07, archived)
WANKSMELL

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 10:50, archived)
GUNTWAN'K

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 11:01, archived)
Thinking of doing a souffle tonight
You ever made one?
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 11:19, archived)

do hav +five finger o h
made had
(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 12:20, archived)
Already done mate
The Aldi staff were not impressed considering it is Bum Out Saturday too
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 13:00, archived)
Friday the 13th has and always will be billyjapper day

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 13:25, archived)
Come on Australia!

(Planearm, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 19:44, archived)
alright 'The Edge' oh no wait

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 19:58, archived)
Not again, can't handle long distance flights now. Australia had enough of my come anyway

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 20:45, archived)
You still in touch with Nipples?

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 21:36, archived)
Get that shagger Kyle Walker on the pitch

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 20:51, archived)
I want to shag Kylie or wank the bitch

(piss and shit, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 23:20, archived)
I’d rather wank off a wallaby

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 21:05, archived)
FUCK O

(sticklebricks, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 15:37, archived)
Alright fucko

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 15:52, archived)
classic GFB thread

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 15:57, archived)
Lol
Bit rude really
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 16:09, archived)
FUCK -1

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 16:20, archived)
Haircut 100zzz,zz

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 18:04, archived)
Been a bit busy lately, anything much happen?

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 12:43, archived)
No

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 12:58, archived)
Christ shut up will you? Nobody's reading all this shit you type

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 13:27, archived)
wow, it's a lot, just sayin

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 16:21, archived)
Nah, everything's fine, especially in the Middle East.

(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 13 Oct 2023, 13:04, archived)
arseboon dilbaro

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 13:27, archived)
My testicles have descended
All 3 of them
They are lovely
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 13:44, archived)
From where? 'On High'?

(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 13 Oct 2023, 15:08, archived)
BEHOLD

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 16:32, archived)
helicopter time

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 16:21, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8387152
(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 13:50, archived)
alright

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 15:33, archived)
Fuck off four eyes

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 15:44, archived)
This is fantastic! Is there anything you can't do?

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 16:23, archived)
I broke a toe day before yesterday on some furniture, it hurts and it's inconvenient because I'm trying to repaint here

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 16:26, archived)
Wow this voodoo doll actually works!

(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 17:05, archived)
try not to break bones it hurts
hth
(piss and shit, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 17:09, archived)
Not much you can do for a toe

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 18:02, archived)
You want a toe I'll get you a toe

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 18:04, archived)
Painting your toes?
Are you a lady girl?
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 19:03, archived)
What do you want to hear?

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 14 Oct 2023, 14:16, archived)
KNOB CHEDDAR thread

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 10:19, archived)
KNOB CHEDDAR

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 10:19, archived)
Obi Wank Ke Knob Cheddar
Very artisan cheese
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 10:27, archived)
Friday the fucking 13th!

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 11:00, archived)
Hey we visited Port Sunlight last weekend
Lovely little place
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 11:13, archived)
Isn't it?
Love the touches of art deco around the place
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 11:17, archived)
Yeah it is a strange little place

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 11:57, archived)
Reminds me of the prisoner

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 12:23, archived)
We went there ages back
Portmerion
Quite surreal
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 12:27, archived)
Was meant to go there years ago
But someone decided they'd rather go to Anglesey instead
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 12:34, archived)
urgh fuck
Anglesey's rubbish
(piss and shit, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 12:38, archived)
I literally remember nothing about the place
Must have been boring as fuck
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 13:25, archived)
I've been there too, I enjoyed it a lot but yeah it was a bit strange, in a number of ways

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 16:32, archived)
Bollocks
to Alton Towers

Always fancied a Port Sunlight visit after reading this book

Envious of your perfect timing, good weather and no school kids
(I helped save b3ta! Dick Wonder ₐ wₒₙₖy, wₐᵥy wₒₙdₑᵣ, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 11:24, archived)
I think it is no Runcorn tbh

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 11:58, archived)
BELLEND BRIE

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 11:18, archived)
+ LARSON

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 11:22, archived)
DrimbleMickeyMouse.gif

(I helped save b3ta! Dick Wonder ₐ wₒₙₖy, wₐᵥy wₒₙdₑᵣ, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 11:32, archived)
morning

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 7:37, archived)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 8:15, archived)
Pissing it down here lol

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 8:19, archived)
And I spent hours yesterday cleaning the car :(

(Planearm, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 9:39, archived)
you can do mine when you're finished!

(piss and shit, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 10:12, archived)
Don't bother
he's missed a bit
(I helped save b3ta! Dick Wonder ₐ wₒₙₖy, wₐᵥy wₒₙdₑᵣ, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 11:28, archived)
Fuck you

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 9:18, archived)
Yes, yes it is.
Unlucky for some. I've just installed ultra fast broadband, are you supposed to tell the difference? Because I can't.
(Planearm, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 9:26, archived)
the porn arrives quicker

(piss and shit, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 12:39, archived)
Happy Friday 13th

(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 9:57, archived)
I’m in the airport
Up yer bum!

Time for holibobs spoons preflight pint.
(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 4:26, archived)
Very disrespectful.

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 4:59, archived)
Looks like the jokes on me
Gatwick weather spoons has a queue stretching round the room. No pint for garold.
(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 5:08, archived)
lucky escape

(piss and shit, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 7:27, archived)
I’m not really that bothered

(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 9:56, archived)
Alright Catherine Tate?

(I helped save b3ta! Dick Wonder ₐ wₒₙₖy, wₐᵥy wₒₙdₑᵣ, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 11:33, archived)
After all the optimism turns out the brain tumour is malignant
Looks like my brother in law is very ill indeed and won’t live for a long time.

My sister is in pieces. My parents are devastated and getting drunk. The two kids don’t know yet.

Fuck.

I am drunk too. Fuck it all. It’s fucking shit.
(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 19:39, archived)
He’s a really good guy
I can’t believe it.
(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 19:41, archived)
Really sorry mate. Sorry for your family.
That fucking sucks dude.
Do as much as you can together as a family.
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 19:56, archived)
Fuck

(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 20:15, archived)
Do your best to help him enjoy what time he does have left
It's about all you can do
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 19:49, archived)
Those poor fucking boys.
They don’t know. My sister has to tell them. They adore their father. He’s such a great dad.
(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 20:15, archived)
Went through the same with my sister
Her boys are 15 now, we still talk about her all the time
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 20:30, archived)
I mean.
There’s no justice. It’s every kind of wrong there is.
(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 21:03, archived)
And people still believe in a fucking god.

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 21:15, archived)
That boils my piss
People telling me she's waiting in heaven for me. Fuck you, cling to your stupid fucking religious crutch if you want, but there is no afterlife, no judgement, stop people enjoying their short span of time on this planet by poisoning them with your ridiculous dogma
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 21:42, archived)
I don’t know
In a day like this if someone feels better for believing they’ll see their loved ones again after we’re all dead. Well. Well. Whatever gets you through this shit.
(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 21:47, archived)
When my dad died suddenly 2 years ago I had a bit of an existential crisis.
I really wanted to believe there was something and I thought about the comfort those people must get for believing in an afterlife etc. it fucked me up.
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 22:14, archived)
I have never felt that comfort myself
But others do. My beliefs are not theirs. If they want to believe that, let them.
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 22:18, archived)
My ideals are not yours
If it makes you feel better, think what you want and ignore me. My ideas don't have to be yours, that's my point.
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 22:16, archived)
Yup

(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 4:24, archived)
No there isn't
Just live the way you want and fuck everyone else
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 21:39, archived)
Those boys though.
I can’t get them out of my head.
(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 21:57, archived)
I'm not asking you to
Be there for them, they will need you.
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 22:14, archived)
I need to turn my phone off
I'm upsetting myself
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 22:34, archived)
well fucking bloody bollocks
sorry dude
(piss and shit, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 20:10, archived)
Yeah

(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 21:55, archived)
Shit news dude.
So sorry to hear that.
(morning Hairy biscuit!, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 20:36, archived)
I can’t stop thinking about the kids…

(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 21:56, archived)
Would it help to lighten the mood if I said 'Alright spanishfly'?

(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 12 Oct 2023, 22:04, archived)
This brought some light to a horrible situation.
I salute you.
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 22:15, archived)
sorry garold

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 21:11, archived)
Isn’t it?

(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 21:54, archived)
Oh fuck, that's really shitty.
I'm so sorry to hear that.
(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 12 Oct 2023, 21:54, archived)
I’ve run out of words.

(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 21:55, archived)
plethora

(piss and shit, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 22:37, archived)
Thanks mate, that means a lot.

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 22:57, archived)
It is, as you say, fucking shit.
x
(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 22:21, archived)
Innit

(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 4:25, archived)
That is shit and wank

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 22:29, archived)
It fucking is an all

(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Fri 13 Oct 2023, 4:25, archived)
Alligator Shitfuck anyone?

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 15:04, archived)
not tonight I've got a headache

(piss and shit, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 15:05, archived)
Your mum said the same thing

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 15:09, archived)
Fuck off you retard

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 15:09, archived)
Get fucked four eyes

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 15:14, archived)
get fucked four chins

(piss and shit, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 15:50, archived)
Get fucked four bellies

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 15:56, archived)
get fucked foreskin

(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt we of all lost both have them, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 21:49, archived)
when?
she's been dead 9 years
(piss and shit, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 15:49, archived)
9 years ago.

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 15:56, archived)
How very inconvenience

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 15:09, archived)
Sorry, I’m on my hollibobs

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 15:38, archived)
How many calories is it?

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 15:40, archived)
AligEIGHTor
That didn’t work did it.
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 15:57, archived)
No meight.

(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 12 Oct 2023, 16:07, archived)
I can't, I'm just off to work

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 16:03, archived)
not right now m8 soz
too busy ramming all this top notch billy down the old 'oculus japonica'
(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 16:07, archived)
Whose turn is it to host the next billyjapping party anyway?

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 16:17, archived)
Billyjapping is what they call Pearl Harbour on Wikipedia

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 16:26, archived)
Probably the Red Hot Billy Jappers.

(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 12 Oct 2023, 16:27, archived)
Billy Eyelish

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 16:43, archived)
Billy eyedol

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 16:46, archived)
Eye we gotta pry this jap so wide?

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 17:13, archived)
Just a small one
I'm trying to give them up
(I helped save b3ta! Dick Wonder ₐ wₒₙₖy, wₐᵥy wₒₙdₑᵣ, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 17:49, archived)
all night long

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 18:05, archived)

bollocks
(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 18:48, archived)
Not me, did it shitfuck you?

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 19:03, archived)
No thanks mate, just had one.

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 19:13, archived)
hollibobs thread

(piss and shit, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 15:03, archived)
ningles

(piss and shit, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 15:03, archived)
SHINGLES

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 15:08, archived)
my better half

(piss and shit, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 15:04, archived)
not three bad

(piss and shit, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 15:04, archived)
chrimbo

(piss and shit, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 15:04, archived)
uni

(piss and shit, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 15:05, archived)
how's yourself doing today?

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 16:03, archived)
crotchfruit

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 16:04, archived)
yeast?
shit, should have said 'plums?'
(piss and shit, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 16:14, archived)
The leader of Hamas has called for a day of Jihad tomorrow, Friday 13th
What will you do comrades?
I may shout in a Marks and Spencers store
Or Jizz on a Jewish person
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 10:35, archived)
Might plop on a palestinian

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 10:41, archived)
Bit racist

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 11:05, archived)
Not racist enough.

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 14:49, archived)
Cum on a Corbyn.
Plaster a Piers or jizz on a Jez, your choice.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 10:47, archived)
Piers Morgan lol

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 11:06, archived)
It's Friday the 13th
I'm going to watch horror films, of course
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 10:47, archived)
Any good suggestions?

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 11:05, archived)
Depends on what you're after
If you want something a bit tame with the occasional jump scare, maybe silver bullet or the shining, basically anything written by Stephen King. If you want gore that doesn't take itself seriously, braindead is your best bet. For full-on nasty shit, I'd suggest the first saw film or hostel 1&2.
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 11:52, archived)
Hostel ones are good

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 11:58, archived)
I like an inventive kill
The liquid nitrogen face smash from Jason X is one of my favourites
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 12:03, archived)
I wouldn't call The Shining 'tame' by any means,
but then, I'm not really into these 'horror' films where the emphasis is just on close-up shots of people being tortured and killed for two hours, as opposed to any attempt at atmosphere and suspense.
(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 12 Oct 2023, 12:21, archived)
Dead of Night is a classic
1940s I think
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 12:23, archived)
It was scary for its time
But up against today's more graphic horrors and special effects, it does seem tame
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 12:29, archived)
The Purge ones are pretty good
I have yet to see the tv series
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 12:33, archived)
But the whole point is that it isn't just about violence and gore.
So it's apples and oranges in comparison to a film where that's the main feature.
(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 12 Oct 2023, 12:41, archived)
One of my faves is Dead of Night from 1945
Real good suspense
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 12:50, archived)
Oh, I like psychological horrors, too
I just don't find them particularly scary
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 13:04, archived)
Totally with you there, genuinely don’t get the appeal of these ‘torture porn’ films
Sometimes leaving things to imagination is far more creative and inventive, although that’s sometimes down to budget constraints.

Also The Shining is a fucking masterpiece
(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 12:51, archived)
Fuck it
I've got a couple of hours before work, I'm going to watch the shining
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 13:03, archived)
Total agreement here too.
Shit films like Saw and Hostel are genuinely appalling. The people who enjoy those films should be put on a list.
(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 14:47, archived)
list of people who enjoy those films, you mean

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 22:13, archived)
might harass a hebrew

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 11:19, archived)
might yeet a yid

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 11:19, archived)
might immolate an israeli

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 11:20, archived)
might guff on Gaza

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 11:23, archived)
alright 2015

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 11:41, archived)
Summer of '69

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 11:43, archived)
He will cry again if you do that.

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 13:43, archived)
Eat hummus with hamas

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 11:49, archived)
Can you persuade Dozer to do a suicide bombing?

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 11:56, archived)

omb umm
(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 12 Oct 2023, 12:22, archived)
Ewwwwwww

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 12:34, archived)
INXSzzzz

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 12:55, archived)
Tantric strangle-wank lolz.

(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 12 Oct 2023, 14:10, archived)
I fucking wish. Creepy cretinous cunt that he is.

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 12:37, archived)
Please Hamas don't hurt 'em

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 11:55, archived)
Sexual Hamasment

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 12:54, archived)
Nice HAM ASS

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 13:00, archived)
That's jihad sorted

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 13:05, archived)
ISHIS ASS

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 13:42, archived)
Jihad just means Friday in Muzlim I think

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 13:11, archived)
It means I just did a jizz

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 13:12, archived)
If I said jihad a beautiful body

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 13:15, archived)
We're flying to Sicily
for holibobs.
(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 13:47, archived)
I hope you have a nice time and I hope you never say holibobs again ok

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 13:51, archived)
Just make sure there are no suicide bombers on the plane

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 13:52, archived)
also: no holibobs

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 14:18, archived)
You've said it twice as much as garold now.

(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 14:48, archived)
Not cumulatively, not by a long shot.
Cunt has form.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 17:14, archived)
very nice
whereabouts?
(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 14:10, archived)
holibobs ffs :(

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 14:20, archived)
hopefully someone will look after his fur babies whilst it's wine o'clock

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 14:42, archived)
SICILY

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 14:32, archived)
last time I was in Sicily I snuck out of the house leaving my wife and daughter asleep so I could go and see Aleister Crowley's Abbey of Thelema
it was cool as shit
(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 14:44, archived)
Recently listened to a podcast by LPOTL
They said he used to sit in a local cafe in all his regalia such as a big hat and cloak…

When people asked the proprietors who he was they said “that’s just Mr Crowley being invisible.

He thought he had cast a spell of invisibility
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 15:16, archived)
If interested
spoti.fi/3po8EZ2
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 15:17, archived)

b3ta.com/search/posts/99401?q=holibobs
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 14:15, archived)
it has to stop

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 14:19, archived)
b3ta, you mean

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 14:23, archived)
alright

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 14:06, archived)
HIYA MATE

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 14:33, archived)
Gas yourself.

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 14:50, archived)
Alright

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 23:08, archived)
Lol blanked

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 6:22, archived)
lol

(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt we of all lost both have them, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 6:23, archived)
morning

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 6:38, archived)
another day, another dollar

(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt we of all lost both have them, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 6:45, archived)
$$

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 7:54, archived)
Are you cloning 80's pop acts?

(I helped save b3ta! Dick Wonder ₐ wₒₙₖy, wₐᵥy wₒₙdₑᵣ, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 10:15, archived)
*rickroll*

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 13:13, archived)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 8:09, archived)
Morning ladies

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 8:59, archived)
Alright

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 9:10, archived)
Remember when this place was good?
No neither do I.
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 20:29, archived)
I remember it going sharply downhill one year, two months and 30 days ago.

(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 11 Oct 2023, 20:40, archived)
That’s when the best one joined isn’t it?

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 20:49, archived)
It was when I stopped doing weekend bingo nights. Got the posters in.

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 20:53, archived)
It was really good years ago. People met up. People got married and had kids . Maybe you're just no good.

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 20:40, archived)
Did you ever go to a “bash”
I have been a member here for about 15 years or more considered going a few but ultimately thought better not to.
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 20:50, archived)
Yes, many

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 20:54, archived)
Fuck no.
Why go meet up with fat weirdos when you could enjoy a nice pint without the fat weirdos?
(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 16:55, archived)
You're right, you should probably just fuck off forever

(Agent Pr1ck llǝɯs ǝɥʇ sʇI ˙ǝɔɐld sᴉɥʇ ǝʇɐɥ l, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 20:43, archived)
Get fucked

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 20:50, archived)
Perhaps you're unhappy and it's making everything seem bad

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 21:05, archived)
Very much this.if you are the common factor in bad interactions all the time. You're the factor.

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 21:12, archived)
The…X factor maybe?

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 21:27, archived)
The factor formerly known as Twitter, you mean

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 22:22, archived)
Well yes if you killed yourself I suppose

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 22:25, archived)
PP this now

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Thu 12 Oct 2023, 9:10, archived)
Imagine, right, if you done a spunk, yeah, and shit come out your helmit

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 16:53, archived)
It's like a description of this place!

(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 16:59, archived)
alright Trouse

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 17:05, archived)
It's Wednesday mate. Halfway.

(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 17:06, archived)
it's my 'Saturday'
been working Sat-Tues lately, it's fucking weird
(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 17:08, archived)
That is weird.
Though I have no fixed days or hours of work. Which is nice.
(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 17:11, archived)
Lol unemployed

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 17:26, archived)
No, it means I'm in charge and get to pick and choose, you halfwit bum.
Of course "unemployed" would be the option a poor person goes to... because "poor" is a state of mind, just like "fat". Man, I hate poor people.
(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 17:28, archived)
^ bald, dole, lives with his mum

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 17:39, archived)
I'm not JMG!

(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 17:40, archived)
We're all JMG here.
Apart from all the baldmonkeys, of course.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 17:44, archived)
That's no help if you don't say where you are

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 17:09, archived)
Runcorn

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 19:57, archived)
Shitty Limits

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 21:03, archived)
afternoon from East Ham-to, I didn't get married here yesterday
I did get a 17% payrise though which is nice - but with that comes a lot more responsibility which frankly I don't want
(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 13:48, archived)
Why not?

(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 13:49, archived)
I didn't want to steal Hedgey's thunder

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 13:50, archived)
Afternoon, I am at my local dental surgery about to get a crown fitted :'(

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 13:50, archived)
alright 'Charles Windsor'

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 13:51, archived)
Yeah not bad ta

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 13:55, archived)
Try brushing your teeth.

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 14:23, archived)
Try threading your monobrow

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 14:25, archived)

imgur.com/gallery/aIb3Wks
(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 14:28, archived)
Lol

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 14:34, archived)
Excellent.

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 15:07, archived)
Can I sell cheese please
And get a pay rise?
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 13:54, archived)
I'm afraid not, soz

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 13:56, archived)
^ the violence inherent in the system ^

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 15:15, archived)
How much cheese do you have to sell?

(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 14:49, archived)
A flight!

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 15:15, archived)
A truckle

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 15:57, archived)
Also, things have gone bad with my Brazilian family
grandmother's dementia has now reached the stage of "distressed" and she's too frightened to go to sleep despite being very tired. She's been waking up in the night and creating havoc but fell last night and is now very scared and hard to manage. Both my mother-in-law and sister-in-law have put their backs out trying to help her so it's not good. Not good at all.
(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 14:53, archived)
Sorry to hear that. How many is a brazilian again?

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 15:16, archived)
About 3 hairs.

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 15:22, archived)
Depends. Do you want one for an hour
or for, like, the rest of your life?
(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 16:15, archived)
:(

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 16:44, archived)
Finally, 30K!

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 19:21, archived)
Keep your space marines to yourself, please.

(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 11 Oct 2023, 20:37, archived)
Morning from Sorrento, I got married here yesterday.
Also found out that social media fantasist and predatory sex offender 'syncubus' is apparently dead, thoughts and prayers to everyone who liked his FB posts about exposing his genitals to strangers.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 11:00, archived)
Congratulations!
Oh, and well done on getting married too, that's pretty cool I guess.
(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 11 Oct 2023, 11:09, archived)
It was, if I say so myself.
40-odd guests, immediate family and close friends only, reception in a restaurant in the hills with views over the bay of Naples, great food and the DJ playing a mix of tunes we chose.

Syncubus' funeral, I mean.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 11:12, archived)
I would have preferred guests who weren't odd, myself

(piss and shit, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 11:15, archived)
Normal people are well weird though.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 11:16, archived)
normie

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 13:22, archived)
Cheersie

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 13:27, archived)
Did you see the clowns?
Staring on their picnic chairs?
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 11:17, archived)
Who do you think the immediate family and close friends were?

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 11:30, archived)
I imagine clowns
Staring and non staring
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 11:41, archived)
40-odd guests, or 40 odd guests?
*fnar*
*snort*
*wheeze*
(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 11 Oct 2023, 11:18, archived)
keep up for fuck's sake

(piss and shit, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 12:51, archived)
:(

(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 11 Oct 2023, 20:37, archived)
If you're going to host a giant orgy in foreign parts you generally don't invite normal people.

(Agent Pr1ck llǝɯs ǝɥʇ sʇI ˙ǝɔɐld sᴉɥʇ ǝʇɐɥ l, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 20:41, archived)
lol odd

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 11:29, archived)
Queef?

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 13:17, archived)
no, I just have a squeaky chair

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 16:49, archived)
Is Sorrento a real place?

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 11:13, archived)
no it's a car

(piss and shit, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 11:16, archived)
I had a mountain bike called a sorrento.
It was FUCKING SHITE
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 11:17, archived)

had a mountain bike called a sorrento. It was
(piss and shit, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 11:19, archived)
Fucking spaz

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 11:38, archived)
+I'm a

(piss and shit, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 12:51, archived)
It's a symptom of gout

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 11:16, archived)
As well as being a fruit sorbet type ice lolly?

(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 11:27, archived)
did you find out about syncubus at your wedding?
were you supposed to be marrying him?
(piss and shit, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 11:17, archived)
No, via the b3ta grapevine.
I mean, I'm sure he would have turned up and hilariously told people he wasn't going to rape them though.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 11:24, archived)
congratulations m8
went to Sorrento on my honeymoon, lovely innit
(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 11:31, archived)
Cheers, coincidentally we're staying in the same hotel my sister stayed in on her honeymoon 26 years ago.
They're coming up for a cocktail later, be interesting to see if it's changed much.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 11:47, archived)
the restaurant on the stone quay in the next bay over is fucking amazing
best octopus I've ever had
(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 13:35, archived)
Why anyone would ever want to get married is fucking beyond me.

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 12:21, archived)
It was fantastic, you fucking stupid fucking cunt.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 12:28, archived)
Syncubus dying, I mean

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 12:38, archived)
+ to me

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 12:39, archived)
any way the wind blooooooows

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 22:18, archived)
other people are loved

(piss and shit, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 12:52, archived)
You will find someone mate, chin up.
I would keep these kind of posts for Facebook you needy spastic
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 13:13, archived)
yes yes that post was directed at myself, yes

(piss and shit, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 13:54, archived)
g+

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 13:19, archived)
gother people?

(piss and shit, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 13:53, archived)
how gare you

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 15:17, archived)
that's what I thought, until I met my wife

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 13:37, archived)
^ gay af

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 13:49, archived)
Fucking hell.

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 14:23, archived)
Ease of travel and employment via green card

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 15:18, archived)
aren't you a citizen by now?

(piss and shit, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 19:54, archived)
No, I've not applied for citizenship

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 21:08, archived)
I agree in your case it seems pretty unlikely. Maybe you could just move to one of those American states where they let you marry animals?

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 22:17, archived)
Congrats m8

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 12:39, archived)
Congratulations!
Everyone knows you were shagging last night
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 12:56, archived)
Are you twelve?

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 15:39, archived)
You're going to have to retire that pick-up line, you're a married man now.

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 22:12, archived)
Congrats, and fuck you hedgey

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 13:18, archived)
^ gay

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 13:48, archived)
Congratulations on this, the day after your wedding in Sorrento.

(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 19:12, archived)
I hope that Vesuvius errupts and buries you all under millions of tonnes of ash and lava.
I mean congratulations
(Agent Pr1ck llǝɯs ǝɥʇ sʇI ˙ǝɔɐld sᴉɥʇ ǝʇɐɥ l, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 20:36, archived)
morning

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 7:43, archived)
gunt

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 8:06, archived)
Blackalicious on here

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 8:45, archived)
Fuck you

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 8:46, archived)
Morning run over. Feel like a king.
Fuck off BPD you cunt.
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 8:19, archived)
Can’t see anything on Strava so it didn’t happen

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 8:24, archived)
alright Brian Harvey

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 8:36, archived)
lol

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 11:40, archived)
I wish you were run over by a fucking petrol tanker

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 8:45, archived)

-t +w
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 9:57, archived)
gut + cunt = Dick Butkus

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 8:26, archived)
shit off cocksock
Alt: morning
(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt we of all lost both have them, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 8:56, archived)
Lol morning comrade

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 9:15, archived)
Today's wordle isn't "spunk"
but it comes close.
(I helped save b3ta! garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 9:31, archived)
punks

(piss and shit, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 9:51, archived)
I used to train people how to use SIEM software SPLUNK.
Had to be very precise when visiting that website and projecting your screen for all to see.
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 9:57, archived)
Yes I had a similar experience training people on JLIZZONMYTITS

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 10:53, archived)
With fucking tits as big as yours you wouldn’t have to train anyone.
Not like they could miss is it.
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 11 Oct 2023, 11:00, archived)

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