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# Newsletter subject line compo
hey people apes
writes some japes
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:41, archived)
# To Infinity and Beyonce!
(I helped save b3ta! atomic A-bomb-a-nation, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:45, archived)
# 100% horsemeat. No bull.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Howdy, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:46, archived)
# Beyonce MAD, Beyonce SMASH!
(I helped save b3ta! Victor Meldrew, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:46, archived)
# You won't Findus in the frozen isle
(I helped save b3ta! Victor Meldrew, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:48, archived)
# Have you ever tried to pull apart a toasted cheese sandwich?
(I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:48, archived)
# Laugh yourself horse
(jandel, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:48, archived)
# Try tasty Findus LancaShirehorse Pot


(I helped save b3ta! Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:49, archived)
# Betty's hotpot contained 40% horse, secret ingredient
(I helped save b3ta! Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:53, archived)
# hahahaha
(I helped save b3ta! HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:15, archived)
# Where have you been all day!
Prolly making some awesome stuff to make us all look bad! Why I oughta . . .


(I helped save b3ta! Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 15:13, archived)
# contains 100% Beyonce meat
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:51, archived)
# Sponsored by "Shergar King"
(I helped save b3ta! Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:51, archived)
# Findus's last edition
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:52, archived)
# Claim a findus fee if you can find horsemeat in this newsletter
(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:52, archived)
# A horse is a horse, main course, of course
(I helped save b3ta! Draconacticus Reject shampoo. Demand real poo!, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:52, archived)
# Search is broken, with horsemeat
(I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:53, archived)
# ^
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:55, archived)
# ^THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(I helped save b3ta! atomic A-bomb-a-nation, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:55, archived)
# Should Findus lasagne be removed from shelves? 1 aye, 99 neighs
(I helped save b3ta! The Silent Channel is getting his recommended 5-a-day, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:53, archived)
# Honey Monster Foods decline to comment over new 'Shergar Puffs' headline
(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:53, archived)
# Ignore 2.0 is shit, with horsemeat
(I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:53, archived)
# STAY ABOUT FROM MY BINS!
(I helped save b3ta! stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:54, archived)
# STAY ABOUT FROM MY FINDAS!
(I helped save b3ta! Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:11, archived)
# something something horsemeat
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:54, archived)
# As read by smug vegetarians everywhere
(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:54, archived)
# Aha!
(I helped save b3ta! The Silent Channel is getting his recommended 5-a-day, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:11, archived)
# Quorsant
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:13, archived)
# Tofu is people
(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:17, archived)
# HA!
Smug bastard...


I also win
(LaCutestOfBorg Whee., Fri 8 Feb 2013, 19:14, archived)
# who are eating vegetables picked with european slave labour
or grown in kenya with more food miles then michael winner.
(I helped save b3ta! Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 16:37, archived)
# B3ta; putting a fiver each way on Findus.
(I helped save b3ta! Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:55, archived)
# Your bowl, your furry hole
(I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:56, archived)
# Smiths to re-release Meat is Redrum
(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:56, archived)
# Wait until you find out what was in the Crispy Pancakes.
(I helped save b3ta! Halibut If you think education is expensive, try crack., Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:57, archived)
# Just wait until you find out what the cheese topping is made from!
(I helped save b3ta! Muns, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:58, archived)
# Guest Edited by Celebrity Chef, John McCririck
(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:58, archived)
# Huhne made me eat horse meat.
(I helped save b3ta! Yo 'Ho of Charlie mass-market saucetrepreneur, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:58, archived)
# [this subject line removed on demand of Beyonce's legal team]
(I helped save b3ta! h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Fri 8 Feb 2013, 13:59, archived)
# Count yourselves lucky. Have you seen the price of Horsemeat?
(I helped save b3ta! Muns, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:00, archived)
# Contains 100% horseshit
(I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:00, archived)
# Garfield disgusted.
(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:00, archived)
#
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:38, archived)
# Yay
(I helped save b3ta! Ham o' Shatner -.-- --- ..- .-. / .- .-.. .-.. / --. .- -.--, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 15:09, archived)
#

(I helped save b3ta! discomeats This canoe, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 19:25, archived)
# Horses, Four Courses.
(I helped save b3ta! Christian's Bolt and Ski, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:00, archived)
# :D
(I helped save b3ta! Halibut If you think education is expensive, try crack., Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:01, archived)
# YES
(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:16, archived)
# nice
(I helped save b3ta! shiro_kuma, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 15:44, archived)
# They found the jockey in the crispy pancakes.
(I helped save b3ta! Muns, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:01, archived)
# This horsemeat story just keeps running
(I helped save b3ta! Halibut If you think education is expensive, try crack., Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:01, archived)
# Phone now for special edition printed on papyrus and framed with a feather from a peacock's arse
(I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:01, archived)
# DNA tests confirm lasagne meat 100% Richard III
(I helped save b3ta! Yo 'Ho of Charlie mass-market saucetrepreneur, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:02, archived)
# Now with more feather and shit poem.
(I helped save b3ta! atomic A-bomb-a-nation, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:02, archived)
#
FUCK YOU
(saintsandy Fiat justitia, et pereat mundus, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:54, archived)
# XDXDXD/
(I helped save b3ta! atomic A-bomb-a-nation, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 16:24, archived)
# aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhaHAHAHAHAHHHAH
(I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 16:43, archived)
# Ow! hehe
(macroscian (1 like), Fri 8 Feb 2013, 17:30, archived)
# ahaha
(I helped save b3ta! Shlvng, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 15:23, archived)
#
(I helped save b3ta! hekim 66 ɐʇƐ𐐒 ʞɔnℲ uooW, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 15:51, archived)
# Doesn't contain any space marine. Just in case.
(I helped save b3ta! Halibut If you think education is expensive, try crack., Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:02, archived)
# now with 97% less horse
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:03, archived)
# "A lasagne, my kingdom for a lasagne"
(I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:03, archived)
# has to be
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:05, archived)
# or not to be
(I helped save b3ta! Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:32, archived)
# that is the wrong play
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:41, archived)
# "Now is the winter of our disinterment".
"Out of my sight! Thou dost infect mine pies".
(I helped save b3ta! joefish It's hard for thee to kick against the pricks, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:48, archived)
# That's the stuff
(I helped save b3ta! Yo 'Ho of Charlie mass-market saucetrepreneur, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:07, archived)
# Brought to you by Champion, the Wonder Lasagne
(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:03, archived)
# Nutritional advice: This newsletter contains 100% of your RDA of Shergar.
(I helped save b3ta! Muns, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:05, archived)
# We can't say it any clearer we're a little hoarse.
(I helped save b3ta! Christian's Bolt and Ski, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:06, archived)
# Garfield's fucking livid.
(I helped save b3ta! Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:06, archived)
# Richard the Third found in car park. Council to review public toilet closures.
(I helped save b3ta! Halibut If you think education is expensive, try crack., Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:07, archived)
# Hurdlers found in burgers - fence arrested
(I helped save b3ta! edjogs Collared doves are shit., Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:08, archived)
# Have some jape-pegs :)
(I helped save b3ta! Elvis impersonator, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:10, archived)
# haha :)
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:13, archived)
# HAHAHAHAHAHA
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:36, archived)
# pffft
(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:43, archived)
# oh jesus
(Rattlehead all time with the gay, forever touching, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:43, archived)
# Time for a tweezer-wank, Rab
Hahaha
(I helped save b3ta! Ham o' Shatner -.-- --- ..- .-. / .- .-.. .-.. / --. .- -.--, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 15:10, archived)
# Hahaha :D
(I helped save b3ta! hekim 66 ɐʇƐ𐐒 ʞɔnℲ uooW, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 15:43, archived)
# lovely
she comes prepared
(I helped save b3ta! shiro_kuma, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 15:47, archived)
# lolz
hahaha
(I helped save b3ta! --- ---, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 18:05, archived)
# Disturbing and terrific.
(I helped save b3ta! Jabberwoc misses D.R. and Quinch, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 20:14, archived)
# everywhere i go
i see the same ho
(I helped save b3ta! zog why change it now?, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 22:25, archived)
# Hahahahahahahahahah:DD
(herman:D, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 22:34, archived)
# I'm fatter
and my penis is smaller
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 23:45, archived)
# Brought to you this week by Findus Crispy Horesflaps
(I helped save b3ta! joefish It's hard for thee to kick against the pricks, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:10, archived)
# HOMOSEXUAL HORSE WEDDING BREAKS WHOLE CONCEPT OF NEWS FOREVER
(I helped save b3ta! An Eagle in Your Mind, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:10, archived)
# Richard III burial site to be turned into Tourist Attraction. Sadly, no parking.
(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:12, archived)
# GCSE's reprieved after Government discovers teachers can't spell baccalaureate.
(I helped save b3ta! Halibut If you think education is expensive, try crack., Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:12, archived)
# Findus Lasagne gives you the trots
(I helped save b3ta! Ninj, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:13, archived)
# RICHARD III SAVES RONALDINHO PENALTY IN FIRST EAST MIDLANDS CAR PARK FUNERAL FOR 23 YEARS
(I helped save b3ta! An Eagle in Your Mind, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:13, archived)
# One does not simply remove horsemeat from Beyonce.
(I helped save b3ta! atomic A-bomb-a-nation, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:13, archived)
# Neigh horse jokes.
(I helped save b3ta! Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:14, archived)
#
Hindu angry that his Findus Lasagne guilt trip was for nothing.

Or: Hundus Lasagne: Contains no beef.
(I helped save b3ta! monkeon schmonkeon, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:15, archived)
# Captain Birdseye forced to admit his cod steaks are 99% seahorse
(I helped save b3ta! HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:15, archived)
# I really liked their Spaghetti Bologneighs
(I helped save b3ta! Saner, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:17, archived)
# hahaha
win
(I helped save b3ta! Elvis impersonator, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:20, archived)
# Carlsberg Special Brew Contains Hair of The Dog
(I helped save b3ta! Ninj, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:18, archived)
# RIP JADE GOODY
(I helped save b3ta! Victor Meldrew, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:18, archived)
# TOO SOON!
(I helped save b3ta! Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:22, archived)
# 4eva in r harts
(I helped save b3ta! Saner, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:23, archived)
# TRACES OF JADE GOODY FOUND IN HAPPY MEAL
(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:27, archived)
# Dug out from beneath a Leicester carpark.
(I helped save b3ta! Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:27, archived)
# Chris Dorner's problem page - illustrated.
(I helped save b3ta! blyerkit e k trilby, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:29, archived)
# Worlds longest cat dies. Now being used as draught excluder.
(I helped save b3ta! Halibut If you think education is expensive, try crack., Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:29, archived)
# Sticking a pick-axe in the skull of internet comedy
(I helped save b3ta! boris the spider, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:29, archived)
# Mattock, shirley?
(I helped save b3ta! Yo 'Ho of Charlie mass-market saucetrepreneur, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:42, archived)
# You would appear to be quite correct
I withdraw my suggestion
(I helped save b3ta! boris the spider, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:44, archived)
# Special 30th anniversary of Shergar's kidnapping edition
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:35, archived)
# a horse walks into a bar
barman says "what do you think this is, a findus factory?"

LOL
(Rattlehead all time with the gay, forever touching, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:42, archived)
# a barman walks into a horse
everybody eats well that evening
(I helped save b3ta! mr_graham downloading an isolation.iso file, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 15:49, archived)
# how many horses does it take to fill a Findus Crispy Pancake?
I don't know, but it's funny because I said horse
(I helped save b3ta! HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 14:47, archived)