less than one hour until hometime
But if you had an hour before the destruction of the world, what would you do, realistically and in a fantasy world?

alt: Should we cull badgers, both offline and online cos they spread TB
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 15 Dec 2011, 16:35, 134 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

How would you make religion fun?

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 15 Dec 2011, 14:53, 199 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

RIGHT.
Let's try again, shall we?

1. Has anyone in your social or professional circle made an alcohol-related cunt of themselves yet, this 'party season'?
2. Did anyone last year - or was it you?
3. Ever pissed or shat yourself as an adult?
4. Sandwiches are almost invariably disappointing. Discuss.
5. Someone pointed out in the paper this week that the most 'marginalised' European countries are currently Switzerland and Norway and they hardly suffer as a result. Do we give a fuck about that ghastly Frenchy and his bent pals?
6. Does anyone have a spare ticket to the Personality Horse NYE Gang Show? I've exhausted all my 'industry connections' and got nowhere. I am close to despair.

Answer one, more or none from the above list.

You may turn over your paper and begin writing.....now.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 15 Dec 2011, 13:26, 210 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

YaaY
I think my knees are better, well better enough to start running again. Huzzah.

Now all I need is some of those love eggs to make it super fun and an alt to add to the end of this to make these few partagraphs worth your while reading.

Alt. Was this worth your time?
(Catomiagi is in with a chance, Thu 15 Dec 2011, 12:57, 27 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Question of the Week vote
IT IS HERE
( Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 15 Dec 2011, 12:38, 3 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

gloves are for wimps, discuss
Alt: what would you "chicken fry" that isn't currently "chicken fried"

altalt: lunch!
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 15 Dec 2011, 12:03, 57 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

squawk santa bring me trill santa bring me trill santa squawk
*wears small santa hat*
squawk squawk wear a hat?

squalt: *pecks trill*
(bollocks parrot squawk squawk squawk, Thu 15 Dec 2011, 11:00, 128 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

I thought of a really good question to ask everyone but forgot what it was
can you try to jog my memory by asking questions and maybe it'll remind me?

Alt: Alt looks likt alto doesn't it? whats your favourite sound?
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 15 Dec 2011, 10:58, 46 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Slept through alarm again! Is this still jet lag or narcolepsy?
Alt: turkey or alternative?
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 15 Dec 2011, 9:22, 298 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

*Tap tap tap*
Anyone up yet? Hello?

I've been up for ages as we were getting a new oven delivered "sometime between 7am and 11am". Shockingly, it arrived at 7:45, which in my history of waiting in for things to be delivered is something of a fucking record. As a result our place looks like a bit of a bomb site as we had to shift a few things from the landing in order to clear a space for the delivery men to get through. Also the Christmas tree is up but not yet decorated, so it's standing in the middle of the living room floor until the missus gets back. I would decorate it myself but it won't meet with her autism perfectionist approval. I also have to have a monumental tidy up and maybe wrap some presents.

What does today have in store for you?

Alt: Christmas traditions?

Alt alt: fuck off, there's just over a week to go.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 15 Dec 2011, 8:14, 296 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

This week is my last week of drinking at home.
I was going to quit in the new year but my belly is growing faster than I anticipated.

Any New years resolutions you really could do with starting now?

Alt: Who has to work over Christmas?

I have my suspicions that Quentin is Rory before he's taken his Ritalin.
( girlinthehole, Thu 15 Dec 2011, 8:12, 5 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

My day has been great - in fact, far, far better than your day!
I had an interview for a real job then lunchtime drinks with Pooflake. We discussed films and the effect mood has on ones perception thereof and I'm having a chinese takeaway for dinner. While waiting for aforementioned takeaway, I'll be drinking my way through a slab of Stella.
Beat that fucker!!



Discuss.
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 18:54, 92 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Why do birds suddenly appear, everytime you are near.
I don't like this, not one bit. I don't want a crow or magpie screeching in my face everytime TORI AMOS is near. What are you too literal about?

Alt: I dunno, when did you find out Santa wasn't real? (LOLOLOLOL he isn't?!?!? ruined that joke for someone)
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 17:44, 34 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

OH MAN
www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=WTpldq3myV0
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 16:26, 106 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

How would YOU decorate a Christmas cake in half an hour?
alt: What's the Christmassiest animal?
alt alt: What toppings would you put on a Christmas pizza?
alt alt alt: Best homemade pyrotechnics?
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 14:41, 257 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Fucks Sake
Hello? Is this thing on?

Calling all offtopic, do you read me?

Shit food, I've just had possibly the worst jacket potato I've ever eaten. By the time I got back to work it was cold so I bunged it in the microwave to heat it up and the cheese melted the container, leaving a lake of molten lava cheese all over the bottom of the microwave.

What is the worst thing you have eaten?

Alt:
Best?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 13:30, 120 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

i'm going to meet my girlfriend for lunch now verily quenders forsooth
póúr l'éxámplé
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 12:30, 6 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

It's my mothercunting birthday, quenders!
A fact which I shall celebrate by doing my weekly supermarket shop.
What else shall I do?

Alt: what did you do on your last birthday?

Alt Alt: Lunch or something, I dunno.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 14 Dec 2011, 11:38, 103 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

How do you stop procrastinating?
I have had a load of things to do for a few days and I simply cannot be arsed, even though it is in my own interest to do them. Your tips please on how to motivate myself to get off the sofa and do what I need to do.*

Alt: What’s the most important thing you need to do that you keep putting off?

*Anyone making comments about how they delayed answering this question because they couldn’t be bothered can kill themselves.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 14 Dec 2011, 10:04, 187 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

I can't liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiive if living is without youuuuuuuuuuuuuoooouuuuuu!

(NoeI «:::P:::» «:::E:::» «:::R:::» «:::V:::» «:::E:::», Wed 14 Dec 2011, 8:21, 205 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Lamb chop recipe please, I'm hungry
what's up tonight freaks, geeks and dickheads?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 13 Dec 2011, 18:26, 122 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

quite clearly, I'm the saddest loneliest cunt here and no one has tried to set me up? wtf?
name me a funny movie or tv show you've recently seen
I'm going with MacGruber omfg hilarious
best sex scene ever right here
www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nm4w_zqcVho
mildly nsfa
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 13 Dec 2011, 16:55, 107 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Sorry, but that thread went from dull to duller.
I'm going on a 'Ghost walk' tonight, not becaue I believe in ghosts but because it's around an interesting bit of london and a mate's going and it beats sitting at home sobbing and lonely.

Do you believe in ghosts? Do you know anyone who does?

Alt: Fuck off back to the dull thread if you need an alt
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 13 Dec 2011, 15:52, 107 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Stale thread is getting stale.
Think of you friends and family and collegues and people you know.... who are you go going to set up with who from here? Describe them to us, and how you'll describe the person to them.

Alt: You can murder one person in the world, with no legal or vigilanty recourse, everyone will know you've done it, it's not private, who do you pick and why?
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 13 Dec 2011, 15:05, 141 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

If you were King/Queen.
Stemming form rants about The Olympics and Reality TV in the last few threads I have a question:

If you were King, ruler absolute dictator of these Isles, what would you first Decree be?

Alt: First up against the wall

ALtAlt: Our new National Anthem?
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 13 Dec 2011, 13:27, 230 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

injustice
i am going to a talk by women who are part of the arab spring. it looks most interesting. however, that's a bit serious for this part of the world. sooooo tell us about those unfair things in life, big or small, that STILL get to you. the pettier the better.

i am still bitter that my younger brother got to go to bed at the same time as me. what is the point in being older?

alt: lunch, of course. cuban bean soup from EAT or a trip up the lebanese??
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 13 Dec 2011, 11:59, 200 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Hi Offtopicers
What goes on here then? Is this like /talk? Are you a friendly bunch or do you hate new people and call them nasty names?
( Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Tue 13 Dec 2011, 10:21, 241 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

New thread for the nine o'clockers.
The X Factor dropped four million viewers from last year's final. Sweet! Hopefully that'll mean the death of the damned thing. With Big Brother on Channel... erm... and Shipwrecked falling on its arse, what's the future for reality teevee? Pitch your idea.
(NoeI «:::P:::» «:::E:::» «:::R:::» «:::V:::» «:::E:::», Tue 13 Dec 2011, 9:21, 102 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Morrniinnnng!
When I got home yesterday the pub at the end of my road had been entirely demolished. It's been shut for a while but I wasn't sure what was happening with it. A digger had levelled the site in half a day.

Turns out it's going to become flats!!!! Always bloody flats.

What is your local like?

Alt: Brandy butter or custard on your pudding?
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 13 Dec 2011, 8:12, 128 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

I'm still awake
I've been drinking far too much despite having an exam on lasers and shit tomorrow*. What have you done that you're likely to regret in the very near future?

*Sponging students etc. etc.
( Hdjejjwsjdjjf LOOK, Mon 12 Dec 2011, 22:42, 60 replies, latest was 14 years ago)