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Morning.
Sun is out. No hangover. Might go out and spend my bonus on posh kecks and diamonds.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 8 Feb 2014, 8:07, archived)
it's raining here off and on

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 8 Feb 2014, 8:30, archived)
gutted

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 8 Feb 2014, 8:56, archived)
it's stopped now

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 8 Feb 2014, 9:03, archived)
going to the pub soon
it's a sturdy building, it should withstand the storm
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 8 Feb 2014, 9:56, archived)
i miss getting shitfaced by 4 on a saturday

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 8 Feb 2014, 10:01, archived)
you still not drinking?

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 8 Feb 2014, 10:19, archived)
still booze free, still nearly my birthday

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 8 Feb 2014, 10:27, archived)
i hope they do something on this forum to mark the birthday of its most treasured forum user xxx

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 8 Feb 2014, 11:04, archived)
i like to think so doves, i will be the big 4 oh

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 8 Feb 2014, 11:23, archived)
fuck frank
I hope mr horrible is ok
(I helped save b3ta! spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 8 Feb 2014, 2:16, archived)
bit harsh

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Sat 8 Feb 2014, 2:38, archived)
Not really.

(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Sat 8 Feb 2014, 2:39, archived)
i dunno frank is the one person
who gives my life meaningm
(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Sat 8 Feb 2014, 2:42, archived)
How do you think your son will feel when he reads this?

(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Sat 8 Feb 2014, 2:54, archived)
fuck off SSG wheres ya zimmer you cunt?

(I helped save b3ta! spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 8 Feb 2014, 2:53, archived)
Hear fucking hear.

(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Sat 8 Feb 2014, 2:39, archived)
alright frank

(I helped save b3ta! spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 8 Feb 2014, 2:52, archived)
You fucking what?
Fuck off.
x
(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Sat 8 Feb 2014, 2:55, archived)
TERRIBLE BULLYING OF BALDMONKEY!
:(
(I helped save b3ta! stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Sat 8 Feb 2014, 3:21, archived)
GO TEAM GB

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 8 Feb 2014, 6:44, archived)
hey done a very job I Very please stay 3.5 hours in TV I never lost any very happy bunny congratulations

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Sat 8 Feb 2014, 7:58, archived)
I hope Frank is ok.

(I helped save b3ta! djrich - Live from Houghton Regis too rass, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 21:55, archived)
if he's not momo is fucked

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 22:12, archived)
always in r harts :(

(I helped save b3ta! djrich - Live from Houghton Regis too rass, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 22:20, archived)
Sunday dinner for one sorted

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 22:25, archived)
I imagine so.

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 8 Feb 2014, 1:32, archived)
I hope he died in a fire
the 2.0 cunt
(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 22:25, archived)
bit harsh

(I helped save b3ta! djrich - Live from Houghton Regis too rass, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 22:43, archived)
Not really.

(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 22:55, archived)
Fair 'nuff

(I helped save b3ta! djrich - Live from Houghton Regis too rass, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 23:13, archived)
not even joking, I truly hope something dreadful has happened to him

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 23:57, archived)
Who's Frank?

(I helped save b3ta! whelkboy is old now, you see, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 23:07, archived)
Gilgy the great.

(I helped save b3ta! djrich - Live from Houghton Regis too rass, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 23:13, archived)
I see.
Two posts in one day. Blimey.
(I helped save b3ta! whelkboy is old now, you see, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 23:16, archived)
This place is dead on its arse without him posting

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 8 Feb 2014, 1:31, archived)
me too
i love him like no other
(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Sat 8 Feb 2014, 2:38, archived)
EXCITING NEWS
The newsletter's out but I'm fucked if I'm linking it you lazy shits.
Alt: food or summat
(#1, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 18:26, archived)
BUMHOLES
I mean, yeah.
(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 18:27, archived)
either work

(#1, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 18:30, archived)
does it mention 2can's shit competition?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 18:28, archived)
dunno
don't read the shit.
(#1, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 18:30, archived)
nope

(I helped save b3ta! H.B.Mupps, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 18:38, archived)
The fucking elitist dog bum fiddling cunts.

(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 18:53, archived)
I know, I came up with some right corkers too
It's a conspiracy I tell ye, organized by the nonces in number 10
(I helped save b3ta! H.B.Mupps, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 18:57, archived)
no real shock there, i think maybe 2can is having a breakdown

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 19:44, archived)
^upset

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 21:21, archived)
not even concerned, just an observation

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 21:28, archived)
I might eat some food or summat in a bit.

(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 18:32, archived)
tl;dr

(#1, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 19:08, archived)
eat some summat

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 19:21, archived)
gonna put the kids in bed and get me an indian dinner in

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 19:28, archived)
Toad in the hole or summat

(I helped save b3ta! H.B.Mupps, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 19:30, archived)
I'm doing some rotten guffs tonight.
Dunno if it was the ripe Gorgonzola I had earlier. They're fucking frightful. Might have to leave the room.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 20:17, archived)
alright

(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 17:03, archived)
tekkers mate

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 17:11, archived)
smyls

(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 17:13, archived)
totes

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 17:13, archived)
toasties

(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 17:17, archived)
afternoon

(I helped save b3ta! H.B.Mupps, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 17:17, archived)
yo

(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 17:18, archived)
yeah things look alright
www.b3tards.com/u/57cc9a3be7d0f074d018/rsz_120140207_171204.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 17:26, archived)
skin up mongy

(I helped save b3ta! Major Turd for tonight only, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 17:28, archived)
no can do gotta stay straight till later, under manners :(

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 17:31, archived)
this is you singing this this is
www.youtube.com/watch?v=cq4YMFFwTlw
(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 18:19, archived)
there surely isn't that much left now

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 18:25, archived)
this is new, i cant stop dealing :(

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 19:26, archived)
looks tasty though

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 19:52, archived)
You wanna see a doctor about those stools.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 20:19, archived)
alright

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 18:25, archived)
What's green and squishy and lives under the sea...?
...an avocado with an aqualung!
(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 17:00, archived)
i'm going home now
goodbye and god bless
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 16:29, archived)
get fucked

(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 16:32, archived)
You've changed your tune, fucking off like a rat deserting a sinking ship.
What happened to wanting 'to be here when this place finally keels over and dies'?
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 16:34, archived)
come to the pub later

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 16:52, archived)
hiya.
You alright?
It's nearly the weekend.
(I helped save b3ta! Frisbee OG wanker, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 15:07, archived)
Alright, shitache.
Thanks for helping us grasp the days of the week.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 15:10, archived)
I know how some of you cunts lose days like doughnuts in your rolls of fat
This is may way of helping
(I helped save b3ta! Frisbee OG wanker, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 15:12, archived)
May way?
Are you the fucking Queen, you fucking queen.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 15:59, archived)
manolith suffers a tragic fiery death and yet you are still alive
proof that there is no god
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 15:14, archived)
Or that I am god?

(I helped save b3ta! Frisbee OG wanker, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 15:57, archived)
yeah, but are you?

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 16:03, archived)
He is though inni though.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 16:17, archived)
It's nearly the weekend, which means it will soon be next monday. Thanks for making me depressed you prick

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 15:29, archived)
you should get a better job

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 15:33, archived)
like what?

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 16:13, archived)
cobbler

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 16:15, archived)
fruit or meat?

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 16:18, archived)
fish

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 16:33, archived)
not an option

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 16:54, archived)
haha holy shit!
alright adam!
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 15:39, archived)
Wahey, alright [MOD EDIT: no revealing Two Hats' identity, please]

(I helped save b3ta! Frisbee OG wanker, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 15:57, archived)
i can't believe two hats is actually barry from eastenders

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 16:01, archived)
SOMETHING INSIIIIIDE SO STRONG
AH KNOW THAT I CAN MAKE IT!
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 16:06, archived)
you have a beautiful singing voice hun xxx

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 16:12, archived)
thx babe x

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 16:14, archived)
How are you love?

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 16:07, archived)
I'm good
Was in a shit company before, now I am not. Happy days!
How's ya doing?
(I helped save b3ta! Frisbee OG wanker, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 17:04, archived)
how did I miss the QOTW? it was good when I started typing...
so anyways, I'll post the fucker here:

Amsterdam Cold Shit Shenanigans

So we're all in Amsterdam, 7 of us, having a lovely old time. 2nd evening we decide to get some mushrooms in, and are sat in a coffee shop, happily munching away, trying to avoid the mould old woman toilet attendant who demanded 50c every time you had a pee in the urinals. Piss Lady we called her.
So we're all coming up, all fairy experienced with natures mind expanders, so me and Redlad head of on a mission to find the Ladyboy with the connection. When we get back, everyone's split off into their own private adventure, so we have beautiful fun and eventually get back to the hotel, to find our pal bloodied and confused, and we get mesmerised by his little adventure...

Whilst feeling the effects of the psilocybin, our Pal (we'll call him Big Al for the purposes of this story) goes upstairs to take a slash. Next thing he knows, he waking up on the floor of said grotty pisshole, with strange faces peering down at him, including pisslady, who's talking to him in dutch, and freaking him the fuck out.
In a grip of panic and altered consciousness, our hero pulls himself back inside his trousers, and runs back to find the lads. Perhaps the bump on the head from the urinal had concussed him, perhaps our mates were just at the bar. But he couldn't find them either way, and ends up stumbling outside into the busy night. Now, this coffee shop was situated on one of the tree lined squares that are dotted pleasantly around Amsterdam, and whilst trying to find his bearings and discovering the blood pissing down his face, Big Al now realises he really needs a shit. really badly. And there's no way he can go back in and face pisslady...
so he finds a bush, and tries as hard as he might to ignore all the tourists and Dutch folks walking merrily around him. We can only imagine the sensations coursing through his consciousness at this point, as a joyous celebration of friends and love and marriage, turns into a rough arsed bushcrap in the middle of a busy city.
Get the fuck out of here, was his next idea. and so a cab is hailed, as the trousers are hastily hoisted back up, and the blood wiped around his face some more.
Where to my friend?
shit, he couldn't remember the name of the hotel, so straight on was the command.
Oh, my friend, I think perhaps you may have trodden in something?
Ooops, the bushcrap was badly aimed, and shoes and trousers are liberally covered in effluent, so with the window opened and statements to the contrary, the taxi driver begrudgingly proceeds... Are you sure? there's a bad smell in here my friend.
No, no, it's cool, I can't smell anything.
Or see anything properly either... where's that fucking card? where am I staying? Finally, with familiar landmarks creeping through the paisley haze, the card is found, the address passed onto the cab driver and the price agreed on, with healthy tip included.
Phew! back to safety. thank fuck. just get my key out...

I'll admit the details of how he got in to the hotel are hazy, as we were just creased up on the floor holding our sides at this point, listening to the worsening tales of woe, but rest assured it took about half an hour for the poor fella to sort enough shit out so that he could get into his room, shower and clean his own filth off his clothes.

It's a good story, and one which I have recounted many times, I just hope Big Al never finds out I told anyone. poor bastard :)
(I helped save b3ta! lustreboy making himself laugh since 1973 (tm), Fri 7 Feb 2014, 12:45, archived)
tl;dr

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 12:46, archived)
I'm happy
for you
(I helped save b3ta! lustreboy making himself laugh since 1973 (tm), Fri 7 Feb 2014, 12:53, archived)
I'm pretty sure I speak for everyone here when I say: get fucked

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 12:56, archived)
any preferences?
anally? orally? aurally?
via a good sounding?
(I helped save b3ta! lustreboy making himself laugh since 1973 (tm), Fri 7 Feb 2014, 13:00, archived)
tl;gf

(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 13:33, archived)
I don't have time to read this right now but I'm sure it's brilliant!
haha
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 12:57, archived)
You had an extra day to submit something and you were still late.
Shame on you.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 12:58, archived)
yeah sorry
I'm one of those main board/ links board twats, who literally saw the QOTW on the front page and thought "at last I have something worth posting!!"
but I realise now I was deluded
(I helped save b3ta! lustreboy making himself laugh since 1973 (tm), Fri 7 Feb 2014, 13:01, archived)
Well done. You've just ruined what was turning out to be a pretty alright day on /talk.
Nice going, jerk
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 13:03, archived)
I hope tomorrow is alright, I really do.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 13:13, archived)
how so?
I'm not familiar with /talk land, just an overbearing ego with no hope of recognition
(I helped save b3ta! lustreboy making himself laugh since 1973 (tm), Fri 7 Feb 2014, 13:18, archived)
MASSIVE DRUGS!
DRUGS FUNGUS
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 13:13, archived)
gotta love it :D

(I helped save b3ta! lustreboy making himself laugh since 1973 (tm), Fri 7 Feb 2014, 13:19, archived)
get that shit off here

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 13:19, archived)
You should complain to the mods.
This is why we elected you class rep.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 13:20, archived)
since manolith no longer gives a toss, they should make me a mod
i'd bring sweeping reform, and clean fingers
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 13:36, archived)
I'm Dr Preference and I endorse this nightmarish vision of a chilling dystopian future.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 13:38, archived)
Manolith was killed in a fire, you monster
Show some respect
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 13:38, archived)
bloody layabout, if he could be bothered for like 5 minutes he'd probably have got away with only third degree burns

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 13:44, archived)
It was his hair coverage that finished him
Once it crept up his back he went up like kindling.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 13:45, archived)
I miss that big fluffy wookie :'(

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 13:48, archived)
He was the noblest of all the giant hippies :(

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 13:50, archived)
Die slowly.
HTH xx
(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 13:21, archived)
doing it every day brother
every day x
(I helped save b3ta! lustreboy making himself laugh since 1973 (tm), Fri 7 Feb 2014, 13:24, archived)
Hiya GeordieJay
You look nice today x
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 13:37, archived)
Hi TH
Is that a new hat?
xx
(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 13:38, archived)
Oh my god, it is!
I wasn't sure, but now you've mentioned it I like it LOADS more :)
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 13:40, archived)
Fuck off, you desperate, attention-seeking dickwad.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 14:57, archived)
/ac

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 14:59, archived)

www.b3tards.com/u/0d2ba503c5487a5f8adb/2014faq.gif
(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 15:06, archived)
soz...
isn't that why we're here?
(I helped save b3ta! lustreboy making himself laugh since 1973 (tm), Fri 7 Feb 2014, 15:11, archived)
To pour scorn on desperate, attention-seeking dickwads?
Yeah. Probably. Now fuck off.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 16:00, archived)
awwww, but I want more half arsed bitter ejaculations vaguely aimed in my direction
it's nice and warm :D
(I helped save b3ta! lustreboy making himself laugh since 1973 (tm), Sat 8 Feb 2014, 11:29, archived)
Fuck off back to QOTW.
Then die in a fire.
(I helped save b3ta! stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Fri 7 Feb 2014, 15:28, archived)
this is great
I feel like I've stumbled into the Slaughtered Lamb and Brian Glovers looking daggers at me :)
(I helped save b3ta! lustreboy making himself laugh since 1973 (tm), Fri 7 Feb 2014, 18:45, archived)
nah your just a prick

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 19:41, archived)
*softly weeps to the sound of his own ragged torn helm skin flapping with the fapping*

(I helped save b3ta! lustreboy making himself laugh since 1973 (tm), Sat 8 Feb 2014, 11:28, archived)
Kill yourself

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 15:36, archived)
Dad, I told you never to say that in front of my b3ta enemies :p

(I helped save b3ta! lustreboy making himself laugh since 1973 (tm), Fri 7 Feb 2014, 18:47, archived)
There's been some good morning threads this week.
Except for "the incident", but I shan't speak of it again.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 12:33, archived)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 7:59, archived)
Shalom The Doveston, Shalom everyone

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 8:14, archived)
fuck you

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 8:16, archived)
And you!!!

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 8:25, archived)
mazel tov

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 8:31, archived)
hakuna matata!

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 9:46, archived)
Hey that's not yiddish you anti-semmite

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 9:48, archived)
Allahu Akbar!

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 9:53, archived)
thats better

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 10:03, archived)
It's a traaaap!

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 10:03, archived)
haha, memes

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 10:05, archived)
*bums*

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 10:08, archived)
+That's why the lady

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 11:01, archived)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 8:44, archived)
hey babe xxx

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 9:11, archived)
alright

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 8:57, archived)
broady

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 9:11, archived)
i see /board is managing to make sitcoms shit

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 9:05, archived)
they're talented like that

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 9:11, archived)
As long as they don't besmirch classics like Last Of The Summer Wine.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 9:30, archived)
We could be doing that if everyone wasn't such a cunt on here

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 9:47, archived)
[c] Last of the Summer Whine
[c] Ever Decreasing Shitcunts
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 9:49, archived)
Floods and fallen trees.
I'm really rather late this morning, but at least I'm getting to enjoy Bob Harris' Desert Island Discs. Jimmy Saville was a lecherous old cunt, apparently.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 9:38, archived)
did a lot of good work for charity though

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 9:54, archived)
Don't forget the Papal Knighthood
They don't give those to just anyone
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 9:58, archived)
i think it was the right thing to do to let him keep his knighthood following his death

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 9:59, archived)
well as you say, he did a lot of work for charity

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 10:02, archived)
yes yes good morning

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 9:48, archived)
yup

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 9:55, archived)
woah steady

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 9:57, archived)
morning. So, what's the plan?

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 9:54, archived)
dunno, i just want to be here when this place finally keels over and dies

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 9:56, archived)
My wife stays with me for the same reason :(

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 10:05, archived)
With sexy results?

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 10:10, archived)
Is there a single word meaning "sexual tragedy"?

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 10:17, archived)
Gay

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 10:24, archived)
woah
steady on Putin
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 10:33, archived)
I was being topical innit #sochi

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 11:13, archived)
prematurely?

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 10:25, archived)
"With premature results"
Yeah, that works
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 10:33, archived)
Or just simply "µ"

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 10:39, archived)
It's all greek to me

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 10:51, archived)
ho ho ho he he he, you little scamp

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 10:57, archived)
we still have a right laugh here don't we

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 11:06, archived)
god bless this forum and all who sail in her

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 11:07, archived)
i love it here

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 11:35, archived)
I'm never going to leave

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 11:45, archived)
no reason too, its the worlds greatest

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 12:01, archived)
GO TEAM GB!

(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 7:46, archived)
Gay Bashers?

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 7:46, archived)
go on you posh snow loving cunts

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 7:52, archived)
Any cunt can slip on snow and ice.
Most of us learn how not to when we're about six and don't forget again until we're seventy.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 7:57, archived)
Make the pricks slide uphill if they're so fucking athletic.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 7:58, archived)
That's not sport, that's dancing.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 7:59, archived)
This sub thread has been brought to you by my granddad.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 7:59, archived)
i like him, i hope he posts more, or instead of if you like

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 8:07, archived)
He's been dead twenty years
but I'll send your regards next time I see him.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 8:11, archived)
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________haha

(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 1:16, archived)
yeah
found any good jokes in your new book yet?
(I helped save b3ta! artifus is doing it all wrong, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 1:18, archived)
ok
how do you unlock a monastery door?
with a monk key
g'night
(I helped save b3ta! artifus is doing it all wrong, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 1:26, archived)
nice!

(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 1:28, archived)
Yes and no.
It's a lot more avant garde than I'd expected. I wasn't expecting cartoons or riddles, but that's mostly what it is. Stuff that would be better ripped off on /board, sadly.

The jokes are there, but it would involve some effort and creativity on my part to translate them to text-only, so it's not going to happen.
(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 1:28, archived)
tease
giz a jimmy fiddle then
(I helped save b3ta! artifus is doing it all wrong, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 1:34, archived)
Dunno what that is, soz.

(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 1:37, archived)
I'm just so disappointed that SSG might die without reading loads more 70s/80s joke book jokes.

(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 1:39, archived)
we all are brb
but it's best not to think about it or even mention it ever again: it's what he would have wanted.
(I helped save b3ta! artifus is doing it all wrong, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 1:43, archived)
a riddle
you said you had some
(I helped save b3ta! artifus is doing it all wrong, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 1:40, archived)
Okay:
Zachary and Naomi were leaving the restaurant. They went up to the cashier and Zachary paid his bill.

But Naomi took out a pad and pencil, wrote IO04I80 on a page, tore it out and handed it to the cashier.

She looked at the number and let Naomi pass without having to pay.

Why didn't the cashier ask Naomi for any money?
(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 2:01, archived)
nine eleven?
nah, zak paid for both, right? naomi's just weird.
(I helped save b3ta! artifus is doing it all wrong, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 2:03, archived)
ANSWER:
,,uᴉou I o 'uᴉou o I,, 'u pu po uᴉ s - 08Iㄣ0OI - o ᴉoN qnu ┴
(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 2:12, archived)
Wow that didn't work in a spectactular fashion.

(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 2:14, archived)
she owes nothing, for she ate nothing

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 2:10, archived)
Gold star right here.
How's the job seeking going?
(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 2:13, archived)
That good, eh?

(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 3:13, archived)
S3I8O08

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 10:50, archived)
'minge', 'fanny' or 'flange'?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 23:33, archived)
Yes please

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 23:40, archived)
haha we had the same joke!

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 23:40, archived)
haha priceless

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 0:06, archived)
give you a fiver for it

(I helped save b3ta! artifus is doing it all wrong, Fri 7 Feb 2014, 0:25, archived)
yes please haha

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 23:40, archived)
super fuzz big muff
www.youtube.com/watch?v=_nGsT_qFMBs
(I helped save b3ta! artifus is doing it all wrong, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 23:50, archived)
okay

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 23:56, archived)
Cloaca

(I helped save b3ta! stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Fri 7 Feb 2014, 0:58, archived)
still coughing, feeling a bit sick too

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 20:30, archived)
youve probably got tb you dirty cuntrag

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 20:49, archived)
i knew those immunisations was a scam

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 21:25, archived)
you cant trust doctors

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 21:36, archived)
i never have never will
you should stick to your own
(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 21:49, archived)
congratulations, you're pregnant

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 22:09, archived)
I think you're going to die again gobbo
:(
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 22:12, archived)
oh noes!!!

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 22:34, archived)
I think I'm going to take up dogging
does anyone have advice for me?
(hieronymus bosch pcmechanic 4ver in ar harts, goodnite sweet angle, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 16:58, archived)
no

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 17:02, archived)
Don't lie.
You were the one talking about setting up a dogging franchise. How's that going btw?
(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 17:16, archived)
ok

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 17:27, archived)
Maybe things will pick up more as the economy recovers.

(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 18:12, archived)
cool

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 18:29, archived)


(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 19:30, archived)
tekkers

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 19:51, archived)
do it at night

(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 17:20, archived)
Learn to lick your own balls

(I helped save b3ta! Cactus 1 doesn't care what you think on, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 17:23, archived)
Try not to be shit.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 18:06, archived)
Too late.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 18:17, archived)
hot cock

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 18:30, archived)
How do I do that?

(hieronymus bosch pcmechanic 4ver in ar harts, goodnite sweet angle, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 18:59, archived)
Quicklime under the foreskin.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 19:07, archived)
Might want to shave your arse before you go

(mediumpete and his frozen cheese collection wrote this, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 19:16, archived)
make sure you wear your most FETCHing outfit :-D

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir The Days Pass Quickly Immersed in the Shadow of Et, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 21:48, archived)
What's your favourite mince recipe?
www.youtube.com/watch?v=pniH2-r6dZU
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 14:22, archived)
that is none of your business

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 14:24, archived)
Too embarrassed?
It's probably really terrible.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 14:25, archived)
ok
good thread
(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 14:34, archived)
Best of the year so far.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 14:36, archived)
Mince pies

(Tetracontagon, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 14:34, archived)
beef

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 14:41, archived)
turkey mince is awful.

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 14:45, archived)
i hate how they wear lipstick also

(Pete Drexler aka Commander Chogis, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 16:08, archived)
*gobbles*

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 16:19, archived)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=cu7gafphe9M
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 15:02, archived)
I dislike mince, therefore I've no favourite recipe for mince.

(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 15:34, archived)
on the cob

(Pete Drexler aka Commander Chogis, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 16:09, archived)
Charles Hawtrey

(I helped save b3ta! Cactus 1 doesn't care what you think on, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 17:24, archived)
afternoon

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:51, archived)
hey hun
that icelander is staying for three nights, what am i gonna do with him?
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:53, archived)
hunt for humpback whales

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 14:00, archived)
oh noes, maybe we should take him to the pub tomorrow
so that you don't get fed up of him soiling your couch with his fermented herring or whatever it is they all eat
(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 14:11, archived)
wait, is he here fri sat and sun nights?
he's not here tonight is he? god help us.
(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 14:11, archived)
yeah, fri, sat and sun
he just sort of announced it last night, i thought he was only coming for saturday night
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 14:13, archived)
lol well how about i look up stuff whats going on in cardiff we can do to stop us all going mad

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 14:16, archived)
well, i made plans to visit some folk friday night, so i won't be around to let him in my flat until late
might just leave him in the cold until i get back, he's icelandic, he can handle it
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 14:20, archived)
yeh he'll be fine
just realised i have no idea when that brother is coming here as he hasnt said, what a situation
(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 14:21, archived)
wanna swap house guests?

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 14:28, archived)
might be an awkward conversation with my own brother

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 16:35, archived)
afternoom

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 14:01, archived)
when was the last time you went outside?
and what did you do outside?
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:01, archived)
what the fuck are you on about?

(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:02, archived)
just trying to start a conversation, calm down

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:04, archived)
this seems like a reasonable reaction to being asked to pay 5p for a plastic bag
"It is time to abandon any thought of this ridiculous green tax that, as usual with everything 'green', achieves precisely nothing but added costs and a fuzzy warm feeling in the pea sized brain of enviromentalists. The sooner the world grabs the planet back from the grubby clutches of the greens who want to drive us all back to living in caves the better."
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:46, archived)
© mailonline

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:49, archived)
Earlier this morning, I went to 'The Shop' and got a drink

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:11, archived)
you workshy layabouts think of nothing but getting your next drink

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:17, archived)
Calm down, it's not like I'm driving or operating heavy machinery

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:35, archived)
and you never will with that attitude

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:43, archived)
Fair point, imma get my shit together

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:52, archived)
Does coming to work this morning count?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:17, archived)
it doesn't if you work from home

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:18, archived)
I went out into the back garden for a smoke last night

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:20, archived)
don't think that counts

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:30, archived)
I went over the road to get some tonic water as well

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:39, archived)

+limes, gin and a copy of hello magazine
(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:49, archived)
I already had all of those, I just needed the tonic water

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:57, archived)
Just now, I did a home visit.
I hate home visits
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:18, archived)
have you ever had someone poop during a rectal examination?

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:19, archived)
When I was a junior doctor I once had to do a rectal examination in the middle of the night on a very obese patient whose bedlight was broken.
When I left the ward I realised that I had shit smeared up my shirt sleeve past the level of my elbow.
Also my friend had someone die whilst he was in the middle of doing a rectal examination.
Does that help
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:22, archived)
yeah, ta very much

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:30, archived)
I was outside at 1am buying a big greasy keeeeeebab
no plans to go out today, or to get dressed, fuck that
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:29, archived)
living the dream

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:31, archived)
might scratch me balls in a bit

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 13:37, archived)
last night i went shopping up the coop

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 14:03, archived)
Chicken-botherer.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 15:46, archived)
bollocks

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 7:52, archived)
bollocks to you too

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 7:58, archived)
toucan

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 8:00, archived)
horrible

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 8:48, archived)
ooh lovely
all dangley and that
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 8:27, archived)
bumholes

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 9:18, archived)
haha
FUCKING YES!!!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 9:34, archived)
I was rather pleased with that

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 9:57, archived)
what about anal bleaching, eh?
I mean, what's THAT all about?
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 10:05, archived)
I've not tried it, do you think I should?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 10:08, archived)
Oh definitely
But consult a professional. Don't use Domestos. Please.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 10:32, archived)
what do I look under in the yellow pages?
I don't want to end up with some backstreet bleacher
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 11:45, archived)
woah
www.bleachbum.com/
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 11:49, archived)
"You don't have to worry about clogging your plumbing."

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 11:50, archived)
õ_Õ

Stay about from my plumbing.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 12:10, archived)
I see she is also a 'bachelorette party maven'

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 12:10, archived)
bumhole racism that's what it is, folks who bleach their anuses are no better than Michael Jackson.

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 10:18, archived)
If you're thinking of being my clacker
It don't matter if you're black or white
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 10:33, archived)
robbie coltrane has terrible wind

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 10:36, archived)
Woah, wikipornia more like
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anal_bleaching
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 10:20, archived)
Cripes!
*bookmarks*
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 10:31, archived)
"somewhat popular in underground circles"

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 11:27, archived)
Arf
My underground circle is anything but popular.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 11:43, archived)
haha bollocks in bumholes, just imagine!

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 9:41, archived)
thats correct

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 6 Feb 2014, 10:55, archived)

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