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Hi weehole's
Queef Smegwin is here. So is the weekend, woo yay and so on.

Work 2moz, then might check out Uncle Hon's BBQ Sun. Supposed to be gr8.

U
(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 15:34, archived)
Lol blanked

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 16:09, archived)
Hi richard

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 16:30, archived)
"Gianni Infantino has the formal endorsement of more than 200 countries for re-election as Fifa’s president"
-o -rie
(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 16:33, archived)
Doing some music playing with some people
A couple of the tunes are modern. They're okay.
(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 16:37, archived)
High queefs, also working tomoz, there's a comedy club down the road, might go and see what it's like, after I've stuck my winky up a weimaraner obvs

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 17:49, archived)

schnitzel up a schnauzer
(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 18:26, archived)
🐢🔌

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 18:34, archived)
beautiful

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 20:25, archived)
I know, I know it's serious

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 19:56, archived)
Oh fuck hahahaha

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 20:24, archived)
me so Hony

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 18:34, archived)
mildly acceptable afternoon

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 12:13, archived)
Hiyas xx

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 12:43, archived)
alright

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 12:47, archived)
Would you like me to sanity-check that for you?
alt: alright
(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 12:53, archived)
my sanity has long since departed

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 12:59, archived)
race condition, corner case, mine too Cheers, currently in its place are silly buzzwords used by large language models to describe mundane things

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 13:39, archived)
Absolutely seriously, I recently read about a study which concluded that the people who use the most buzzwords are most often the least technically capable
While I've always suspected that, nice to see my bias confirmed by, er, the internet
(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 13:42, archived)
Idea for a single-page site, iknewit.com, just a page that says YOU WERE RIGHT ALL ALONG
(If you want a tripwire for future-you: a quick sanity check when something scheduled isn't firing is to grep . . . etc.)
(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 13:45, archived)
TEN DOLLARS AND I'LL DO IT

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 14:33, archived)
That's a days food and drink. Too expensive for me

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 14:44, archived)
How's the food been, no upsets?

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 16:27, archived)
Only a big Mac , went straight thru

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 17:15, archived)
haha fucking hell

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 23:05, archived)
I'm sorry, you don't even appear to know any buzzwords

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 16:22, archived)
Yo

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 12:59, archived)
Word

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 13:00, archived)
Beers with cheers
Cheers
(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 13:38, archived)
I'm in the red lion

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 14:09, archived)
Home Alone 2: Life Lost in New York

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 14:09, archived)
good morning

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 5:18, archived)
morning

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 5:21, archived)
we're the wide awake club

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 5:25, archived)
I can’t get no sleep

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 5:29, archived)
isfaction

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 5:56, archived)
A marching band woke me up at 9am. That's a first

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 5:33, archived)
i hope they were colombian

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 5:47, archived)
Sounds unlikely, given that mongy is in Southeast Asia.

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 7:39, archived)
Yeah they were definitely Thai school kids

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 7:41, archived)
Well there we go then.

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 9:46, archived)
*groucho eyebrow waggle*

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 12:03, archived)
Hello

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 9:10, archived)
morning

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 9:24, archived)
at my eldest's graduation ceremony :)

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 10:39, archived)
CONGRATULATIONS FABULOUS ACHIEVEMENT

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 11:07, archived)

Obviously your eldest hasn't done so badly either
(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 11:07, archived)
thanks babes xxx

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 12:19, archived)
now you are old forever

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 11:14, archived)
I already was

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 12:19, archived)
yes, you were, but now you are

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 13:49, archived)
Good Evening

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 21:37, archived)
It's coming hard, it's coming hard, it's coming
My knob's coming hard

3 pubes on a scrote
Purple bellend gleaming
Girthy meaty spurts
All the ladies screaming!

Sorry, I mean good evening Vlad
(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 21:48, archived)
gosh
- so you fancy those Argies for the win?
(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 22:06, archived)
I would like to see Spain win
fresh lads full of joy rather than cynical wily old fuckers. They're boring. Move over grandads
(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 22:16, archived)
yeah and we gaven't won it since 2010
iy's definitely our turn again. their turn, i mean.
(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 23:35, archived)
:) that's the spirit

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 1:01, archived)
i was living there when they, we, won it in 2010. was gud.
yo soy Español! yo soy Español! yo soy Español! was the chant
(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 5:22, archived)
^soy-boy

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 9:47, archived)
Oh that must have been spectacular

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 11:08, archived)
either work, Chundy old boy, either work

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 22:14, archived)
WHAT

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 22:57, archived)
ARSEHOLE.

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 23:15, archived)
Hullo knobkin's
How's it going? Bit warm here, by which I of course mean I've just pissed my pants.
(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 14:34, archived)
Are knobkin's a subculture of individuals who identify, either partially or entirely, as knob's?
Asking for a friend.
(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 14:51, archived)
Don't pretend you don't know m8

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 15:40, archived)
Better than someone else pissing your pants
that's just plain rude.
(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 15:05, archived)
Spose

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 15:43, archived)
let's not be too hasty here

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 16:53, archived)
yes some people would pay good money for that

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 17:32, archived)
TEN DOLLARS

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 18:25, archived)
Sniff my peptides
I mean, hi!
(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 15:33, archived)
Smell my bell
Sorry, I meant 'hi pal'
(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 15:43, archived)
alright

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 15:44, archived)
Get effed

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 15:47, archived)
Way ahead of you

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 15:48, archived)
Bit warm here too
because I have shat, profusely, into my undies. Not to one-up you or anything.
(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 15:54, archived)
Happiness is a warm gusset

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 15:57, archived)
Ha, penis

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 16:00, archived)
The greatest gift, that I possess

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 16:02, archived)
lols

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 16:29, archived)
High queefs, bit toasty here
by which I of course mean I've stuck my knoblet in the toaster
(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 15:56, archived)
I love the smell of burning pubes
Nick Lowezzzzzzz
(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 16:00, archived)
DHL are really getting on my knoblet

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 16:38, archived)
Better than Evri m8
Low bar, but true
(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 16:56, archived)
It's a bit warm here too
by which of course I mean that I am being turned slowly on an infernal rack in one of the lower pits of hell
(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 16:55, archived)
I was chuffed to bits to see the Hieronymous Bosch room at the Prado a few weeks back
Didn't know they also had Goya's Saturn Devouring his Son too. Excellent stuff
(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 16:59, archived)
I'm having a hieronymous bosch as I type this

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 16:59, archived)
he makes a good drill

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 17:39, archived)
A man of many talents

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 18:15, archived)
you don't know what you're torquing about

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 18:36, archived)
Bit rude

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 18:37, archived)
sorry chuck

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 21:21, archived)
Cool, I hope he did Guaglione

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 18:27, archived)
not a fan of avocado, myself

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 19:11, archived)
disgusting

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 22:16, archived)
I liked the detective books

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 18:35, archived)
Oh wow
Was that a viscerally upsetting picture to be in proximity to
(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 21:16, archived)
It really was

(, Fri 17 Jul 2026, 10:22, archived)
afternoon

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 13:54, archived)
ARSEHOLE

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 18:25, archived)
morning

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 7:37, archived)
morning, morning

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 7:58, archived)
Cheers, Cheers

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 8:01, archived)
The buttons fallen off
the fly of my boxers
and my knoblet keeps falling out
(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 8:34, archived)
morning, I mean

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 8:37, archived)
my knob's fallen off
let's box a fly
out of a button
(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 8:42, archived)
Gianni Infantino looks like the bastard offspring of William Hague and that terrifying Kinder Egg from the advert

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 10:55, archived)
If you crack his head open it's full of liquid gold! If he thinks really hard he can reabsorb it then shit out a peace prize two days later!

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 10:59, archived)
I'VE LAID YOU A BEAUTIFUL PRIZE MISTER PRESIDENT, FROM MY HAGUE-KINDER CLOACA

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 11:03, archived)
Chickens lay eggs, eggs lay prizes
This sounds like a game show waiting to be made, I'll devise it now.
(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 11:05, archived)
That's kinder eggs

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 11:36, archived)
Ballfoot. Now there's a game.

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 21:03, archived)

it's epic
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 21:25, archived)

come on lads. just this once
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 21:26, archived)

never mind the fifteenth player or whatever number it is on their squad
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 21:26, archived)
sure, it's a challenging wank for a mainly hetero chap
- but footie's full of barely contained homoeroticism, so it's what they would have wanted i guess
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 21:45, archived)
It's got "ball" in the name, after all.

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 22:34, archived)
Phoowar!

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 12:09, archived)
Ok I'm watching. One of the football men just fell down and the referee made a face.

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 21:50, archived)
Oh. Everyone is making a face now

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 21:54, archived)
the f in football stands for face

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 22:12, archived)
actually the f stands for fail

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 0:47, archived)
and what does fail stand for? that's right it stands for First Attempt In Learning

(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 0:49, archived)

face FALKLAND ISLANDS
(, Thu 16 Jul 2026, 13:02, archived)
That argentina goal was superb

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 21:52, archived)
Didn't even use his hands, most impressive

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 21:56, archived)
That's what she said!

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 22:10, archived)
lol football fail

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 22:04, archived)
O diar. Am drueni. Mor drist. Dim ots.

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 22:08, archived)
Oh well, I would have preferred England to win but they didn't, oh well

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 22:18, archived)
Eleazar Obi: Off the pitch, does Argentina have Nigerian playing for them ?
Mary Rose Galvez: Eleazar Obi - only Argentinean
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 22:22, archived)
Argentina have a MacAllister playing for them, mad

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 22:26, archived)
That woman in The Secret In Their Eyes was called Hastings and said "it's Scottish", it's woke immigration gone PC.
N.B. I'm talking about the Argentinian film which is an absolute classic, not the Hollywood remake which I haven't even seen because why the fuck
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 22:39, archived)
alright

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 13:17, archived)
ARE YOU STILL HERE

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 13:21, archived)
I deleted my account yonks ago, do keep up.

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 13:28, archived)
Everybody's deleted their account, Dave.

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 13:37, archived)
, Trouser

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 13:40, archived)
Are you actually asking?

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 13:32, archived)
afternoon, morning

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 13:39, archived)
Sent you a v important gaz

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 13:48, archived)
my money is on 'Sent you a'
they're in good form this season
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 14:01, archived)
come on you gazzes!

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 14:04, archived)
COME ON BARRY

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 17:50, archived)

mew
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 20:04, archived)
viz, maybe yours

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 14:42, archived)
Vigaz
With a soft g
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 16:21, archived)
I could have sworn there was a thread on /links where some guy was smearing charcoal over his gums to filter out impurities in the air.
No, you're right that would be totally insane, I must have misremembered.
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 16:28, archived)
SOUND THE DELETION HORN

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 16:34, archived)
Removing Internet posts because they may harm your upcoming court case is ok I think

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 16:37, archived)
oh good that's a reliefNO REASON FORGET I SAID ANYTHING

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 17:03, archived)
I just hope nobody still had /links open on another tab and was able to screengrab it

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 17:38, archived)
They can handle the helmet, they can't handle the black teeth.

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 18:00, archived)
Terrible racism against people with charcoal in their mouths :(

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 18:19, archived)
negative blackface

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 19:16, archived)
picks up the ricezzz

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 19:26, archived)
lol horn

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 16:39, archived)
no not the lol horn, the DELETION HORN, can't you read

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 18:20, archived)
rofl trombone

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 18:48, archived)
parp

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 18:49, archived)
No, you may not have a brass rubbing of my puckered hoop
And also no to your other question
Soz, I rarely read gazes
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 14:59, archived)
My feelings are hurt by this.

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 15:26, archived)
sending thoughts and prayers m8

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 16:39, archived)

a br an
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 16:33, archived)
alright supergrass

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 13:44, archived)
Alright piss you fucking miserable cunt

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 14:10, archived)
especially so today
house sale stress is through the fucking roof
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 16:21, archived)
Well that's going to significantly reduce the value

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 16:22, archived)
FEWER

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 16:22, archived)
I started a business converting lofts into boats
sales are through the roof
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 16:25, archived)
I've started a retail business in a building which has no doors or windows, however it does have a skylight

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 17:40, archived)
I think you might need to workshop that joke a bit.

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 18:41, archived)
I started a joke workshop, all the tools are made of rubber and there are whoopee cushions on all the stools

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 18:47, archived)
-workshop, all the tools are made of rubber and there are whoopee cushions on all the stools
+which started the whole world crying
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 18:49, archived)
-a joke workshop, all the tools are made of rubber and there are whoopee cushions on all the stools +something, typical me typical me typical me

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 19:13, archived)
- a joke workshop, all the tools are made of rubber and there are whoopee cushions on all the stools
+ something I couldn't fi
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 19:29, archived)
+ and clowns at ALL other tables

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 20:02, archived)
TEN DOLLAR TAP TAP TAP

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 20:21, archived)
WHOOOPEEEE

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 22:24, archived)
I've booked a sleeper train to Bangkok. I feel at 50+ I might regret this.

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 14:14, archived)
If you're gonna bang 50+ cocks on a train I doubt you'll be getting much sleep

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 16:24, archived)
I HAVE HAD IT WITH FUCKING THESE COCKS ON THIS FUCKING TRAIN

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 16:33, archived)

actual lol
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 21:25, archived)
you might catch a tuk tuk

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 16:33, archived)
Tukky Tukky 10 dorrah?

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 16:36, archived)
TEN DOLLARS NOW

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 17:40, archived)
( ( ( [̲̅$̲̅(̲̅ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°̲̅)̲̅$̲̅]

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 17:43, archived)
Is this a bitcoin?

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 18:19, archived)
you wont know until you try

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 18:15, archived)
alright

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 18:15, archived)
Hi Will

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 18:36, archived)
Level with me Will

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 18:53, archived)
*levels*

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 18:58, archived)
🎚️👍🏻

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 23:31, archived)
morning.

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 5:23, archived)
mořning

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 5:29, archived)
5 hours sleep again. feel ok tho, woke up 5 mins before alarm which is always nice for beating sleep inertia.
time for more coffee
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 5:32, archived)
*lack of sleep fives*
Early morning gym session now
#wellness
#shutupm8
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 5:39, archived)
Do say hi to jim for me

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 6:01, archived)
Jim says hi and asked why you never call

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 8:31, archived)
My daughter is 18 today
A day of reflection and drunken misery awaits, dibnah eh eff
#bellmess
#shutupm8
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 6:03, archived)
smeg

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 7:59, archived)
A day of reflection and drunken misery await who? You or her? Or both?
share the unhappiness, that's what families are for!
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 9:04, archived)
18 is the perfect age at which to embark on a lifelong journey of drunken misery.

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 9:24, archived)
I like your positive messaging but we all know 18 is leaving it a bit late

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 11:31, archived)
All right spanishfly

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 12:08, archived)
to start drinking

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 13:02, archived)
He'

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 13:09, archived)

Aww heck if I remember correctly
Even the wise cannot see all ends
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 9:16, archived)
They can see this one, though.
*retracts*
*points*
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 9:25, archived)
do you want to get banned from the park AGAIN

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 11:36, archived)
the wise don't try, vlad

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 11:31, archived)
amen

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 11:36, archived)
Morning.

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 6:59, archived)
aardvaak

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 7:59, archived)
MiseryCute

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 8:27, archived)
MiseryCunt

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 7:21, archived)
morning

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 7:59, archived)
No need for that level of hostility mate.

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 8:38, archived)
TAINTPONG

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 10:27, archived)
Invented by the French, it was originally known as "guffe-waffe"

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 11:24, archived)
I think I'm round the corner

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 12:06, archived)
GOOD EVENING

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 20:37, archived)
oh fuck off

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 20:44, archived)
After you.

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 20:44, archived)
TEN DOLLARS NOW

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 22:08, archived)
IT'S JUST BUSINESS

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 1:15, archived)
I'll do it for 9, that's why they call me, mofaha
This is my outfit. I'm the swarthy one.
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 1:13, archived)
is that R1D1?

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 11:45, archived)
sure, you just use a little drop and it stops the squeaking

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 13:01, archived)
FOR TEN DOLLARS

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 13:04, archived)
I TARIFF YOU, YOU STAY TARIFFED

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 17:44, archived)
moths just coming out now

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 21:02, archived)
bees still, erm, busy, but the butterflies have turned in now
over to the evening shift
(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 21:03, archived)
swifts are still making great sweeping screaming passes across the sky as it deepens into its late colours

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 21:04, archived)
swifts seldom make passes at bugs who wear glasses

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 21:05, archived)
Stop talking such utter bullfeathers

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 22:08, archived)
Alright, Zack de la Rocha.

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 22:40, archived)

Zack de la Rocha Billy Bragg
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 10:28, archived)
A flock of storks/ herons , leggy Thai birds roosted in my tree yesterday. Big old birds

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 0:00, archived)
I saw a night heron in a tree in Florida once, it sounded like someone thrashing about with an open umbrella when it landed
ungainly fucking things
(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 1:11, archived)
They are basically dinosaurs, I love them

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 6:38, archived)
I'd like to associate myself with these sentiments

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 9:17, archived)
afternoon

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 13:24, archived)
Lol blanked

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 14:35, archived)
BWC sausages m8

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 14:38, archived)
The "BWC Spiced Lamb Sausage Bun" is a signature menu item at the Black Wheat Club, a micro-bakery and bistro in York, UK.

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 14:51, archived)
Try the Kings Fingers, they're fingerking great!

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 14:52, archived)
Oh, is that what BWC stands for?

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 14:53, archived)
possibly, goggle's ai came up with this. i suspect it's true because it knows where i am but didn't try to immediately recommend something local

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 15:13, archived)
No worries, I found something local

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 16:47, archived)
TEN DOLLARS

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 18:24, archived)
( ( ( [̲̅$̲̅(̲̅ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°̲̅)̲̅$̲̅]

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 21:59, archived)
this gives me an idea for a show about a ten dollar bill and his adventures each week with different owners

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 22:04, archived)
It's called Ten Dollar Bill

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 22:04, archived)
lol

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 16:19, archived)
The fucking nerve...
b3ta user "morning", trying to make an "afternoon" thread. ffs. This place is beyond repair.
(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 15:33, archived)
it's ironic, it's postmodern

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 15:40, archived)
it's 10,000 spoons, but they're those designey ones that nobody can figure out how to use

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 15:41, archived)
You better not be wearing shorts while you make this complaint, Trouser.

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 16:10, archived)
short trousers are still trousers, trouser

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 19:11, archived)
Trouser's trousers, Trouser

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 22:02, archived)
Don't be absurd!

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 8:53, archived)
DAVE TROUSER

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 16:20, archived)
elo vlad

(, Wed 15 Jul 2026, 8:53, archived)
morning

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 5:51, archived)
Cheers

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 5:57, archived)
invisible wizard
- AIDIR?
(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 7:07, archived)
Gandalf the Transparent

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 11:43, archived)
Invisbit

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 12:33, archived)
Anyone famous dead today?

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 8:07, archived)
When Jay Kay carks it, I bagsy posting 'Deeper Underground' to mark the occasion.

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 8:18, archived)
Little Hell

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 8:34, archived)
JamiroDIE

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 8:52, archived)
Doomed to repeat the same puns forever
b3ta.com/talk/8469723
(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 8:53, archived)
You only have to bagsy something once, not every fucking month

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 8:56, archived)
OLIVIA NEWTON GONE

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 8:57, archived)
Hitler

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 9:16, archived)
Morgue Freeman

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 9:16, archived)
Morgone Free-at-last-man
/ac
(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 12:21, archived)
Morning?

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 8:34, archived)
The cat just came in, jumped on my desk, nosed around
and did a really vile fart that's lingering long after he's left the room.

Little bugger.
(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 9:40, archived)
That was me m8

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 9:42, archived)
You need to cut down on the cheap cat food

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 12:50, archived)
+get some exercise

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 12:51, archived)
PURRKLIFE

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 13:01, archived)
by Purr

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 13:07, archived)
This Is A Claw

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 13:10, archived)
Fur Tomorrow

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 13:17, archived)
Modern 9 Lives Are Rubbish

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 13:38, archived)
Country Housecat

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 13:54, archived)
Trimm Tabby

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 14:11, archived)
Evening :)

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 21:41, archived)
Hi

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 21:42, archived)
HI

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 21:45, archived)
CHARCOAL POWDER. 10 DOLLARS NOW.

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 1:03, archived)
OH NO MY TEETH ARE CHARCOAL DO YOU OFFER A CLEANING SERVICE

| | | | | |
| |_ ___ ___| |_| |__
| __/ _ \/ _ \ __| '_ \
| || __/ __/ |_| | | |
\__\___|\___|\__|_| |_|

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 1:44, archived)
Where's hedgy? This charcoal powder contains 32.81% detox, it says here.

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 1:48, archived)
Rub it on your teeth for maximum detox, removes 0.042% of airborne toxins

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 6:11, archived)

teeth bollocks
(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 10:06, archived)
You would say that

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 15:17, archived)
yes
- lovely, innit
(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 22:15, archived)
afternoon

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 13:31, archived)
Morning is wishing us a good afternoon?!
Consider my melon well and truly twisted!
(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 13:37, archived)
^ Sean Ryder before he tried drugs

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 13:50, archived)
Seeing as you enjoy poking mentals so much
b3ta.com/links/How_to_defend_yourself_from_personal_attacks_and_gaslighting
(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 18:22, archived)
don't be mean to the person that posted my most favourite ever reply on b3ta

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 18:48, archived)
What was that?

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 20:30, archived)
this reply to an unidentified links hard man that I must have on ignore
b3ta.com/links/1633138
(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 20:35, archived)
oh no oh no I love everyone replying here what do I do

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 21:45, archived)
I saw that post.
I'm not watching that video (or parts 2 to 5), and I'm going to make myself as tiny and quiet as possible until the OP goes away.
(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 19:11, archived)
OK, I caved

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 19:19, archived)
Ha shit, I only just noticed he edited his post.
Charcoal powder, wtf
(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 19:29, archived)
Yes that's why I was surprised not to see a reply from you.

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 19:49, archived)
"jonbob" has me on 2.0, the touchy prick

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 6:12, archived)
I wish "cumqaat may" would also put me on 2.0,
the insufferably verbose know-all
(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 6:14, archived)
I did not watch the video
But fucking hell what a thread.
(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 1:03, archived)
I watched about 30 painful seconds, he's very obviously toxic to deal with

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 1:42, archived)
watching a small bit of it has fucked my youtube suggestions

(, Tue 14 Jul 2026, 8:51, archived)

morning: afternoon
everyone: wait what
morning: 😎
(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 14:47, archived)
hi vlad, I replied to your saturday post, in case you don't scroll down
b3ta.com/talk/8480138
(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 15:08, archived)
Actually I didn't know wtfywboa but the pics brought it right back, I have definitely read #3
On closer inspection was #1 I read.
Aaaand I think I just remembered where I saw it, kept in the toilet in a UK place where I stayed.
I've lived here so long that "in the toilet" when used figuratively sounds unpleasant to me.
(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 15:46, archived)
I think it was one of those book series
where every UK household had at least one of them in the 80s, probably a Christmas present
(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 16:09, archived)
Didn't it get a bit soggy?

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 17:04, archived)
couldn't bring myself to type loo

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 17:34, archived)
What's wrong with "bog"?

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 19:29, archived)

awww yesss nigel rees \o/
I think someone told it me, I don't remember reading it in one of his
(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 17:13, archived)

maybe they read it in there
(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 17:14, archived)

lol tho
Fucque Braque
(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 17:17, archived)
Or someone who read it told them,
there's no way of knowing how deep this rabbit hole goes
(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 17:24, archived)

Rabbit burrows typically reach depths of 1 to 3 feet underground, but can extend down to 10 feet in complex networks called "warrens". Tunnels can span up to 150 feet long and feature multiple chambers for nesting and escaping danger. In contrast, simple nesting holes are usually only 6 to 10 inches deep
(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 18:43, archived)

Rabbit burrows typically reach depths of 1 to 3 feet underground, but can extend down to 10 feet in complex networks called "
what do call a man with rabbits on his head?
s". Tunnels can span up to 150 feet long and feature multiple chambers for nesting and escaping danger. In contrast, simple nesting holes are usually only 6 to 10 inches deep
(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 19:14, archived)
I'm in absolute bits at this tysm

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 21:46, archived)
evening

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 18:00, archived)
Cheers

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 19:19, archived)
Gunt up the jam, gunt it up
While your gunt is stompin'
And the jam is guntin'
Look ahead, the gunt is jumpin'
Gunt it up a little more
Get the party goin' on the gunt floor
(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 20:41, archived)
Morning.

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 7:47, archived)
I can't think of any good Sam Neill death puns,
and I really can't be arsed dredging through his filmography to come up with one.
(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 7:55, archived)
Have some respect please, a man has died.

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 8:16, archived)
It's OK, we just need to find a mosquito that sucked his blood and then we can clone him.

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 8:25, archived)
They can now extract intact DNA from human remains that are thousands of years old.
So if you want to clone Sam Neill, you'd have no trouble at all collecting DNA directly from his body, given that he's only been dead for a few hours.

Hth
(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 9:17, archived)
You're right, we can just use some Neill.

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 9:20, archived)
Hedgehog, after careful consideration, I've decided, not to endorse your park.

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 18:10, archived)
Jurassic Cark, obviously.

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 9:02, archived)
👍🏻

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 11:53, archived)
Death finds a way!

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 12:02, archived)
Event Horizombie

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 9:31, archived)
(Ambulance) Sirens

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 9:32, archived)
Very Peaky Blinders

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 9:51, archived)
The Pianuuurgh

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 10:20, archived)
The Hunt For Dead New Zealander

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 11:29, archived)
Sam Keeled over

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 13:04, archived)
E' went horizgone

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 13:25, archived)
The 12 Inch Pianist

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 14:41, archived)
morning Tea

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 7:55, archived)
Morning, Vizzy.

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 9:47, archived)
M’ning

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 8:19, archived)
M'lady.
*doffs trilby*
(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 9:11, archived)
M'ong

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 14:44, archived)
Mongychops should hang out with these people.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hmong_people

They might accept him as a long-lost relative.
(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 17:06, archived)
Catchphrase: don't worry, you're hmong friends!

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 18:41, archived)
Moriboobs

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 10:05, archived)
Borning Mitches

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 10:14, archived)
afternoon

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 12:05, archived)
Good evening.

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 21:27, archived)
good evening, morning

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 22:02, archived)
Good evening morning, although I think it's almost morning where you are morning, but still; morning, I mean evening
actually sorry morning, if it's not almost morning where you are, morning, at least we can agree it's evening now, morning
unless it's morning where you are now, morning? ive run out of punctuation
(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 23:03, archived)
alright

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 23:59, archived)
morning alright

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 0:17, archived)
Not you.

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 0:30, archived)
morning!

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 0:40, archived)
alright morning Cunt

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 0:40, archived)
Sam Kneel

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 7:10, archived)
Jurassic Carked

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 7:11, archived)
Dead Calm

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 7:24, archived)
Memoirs of a Dead Man

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 7:35, archived)
Afternoon
Just seen some wheelchair tennis guy called Giant Mystery at Wimbledon.

Supposedly it's spelled Jayant Mistry, though.
(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 12:42, archived)


⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣤⣤⣀⡀⠀⠀
⠀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀
⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣅⠀
⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠀
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀
⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠋⠀⠀
⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠙⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠃⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠛⠛⠛⠛⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 12:56, archived)
555
That's hahaha in Thai
(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 13:20, archived)
888
That’s teletext subtitles in 1995
(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 15:47, archived)
666
that's the phone number for the australian police
(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 15:55, archived)
-666 +whoop whoop

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 19:49, archived)
3^5.286799128219
that's the magic numbers
(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 19:59, archived)
that took fucking ages by trial and error adding more numbers past the point
to get it exactly right. maths is not my strong suit
(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 20:02, archived)
Wan Hung Low

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 13:59, archived)
Whodja Knickerbollockoff

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 14:00, archived)
Dean Windass

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 14:45, archived)
Danny Shittu

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 14:45, archived)
Joey Buttafuoco

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 18:33, archived)
Bum Farto

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 18:57, archived)
Anita Pugh

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 19:47, archived)
Mustapha Dump

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 19:52, archived)
morning

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 4:31, archived)
Hello mc

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 7:51, archived)
Hi

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 7:51, archived)
omg surprise Rorschach! what do you see?
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fried_chicken#/media/File:Fried-Chicken-Set.jpg
(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 8:50, archived)
Tasty tasty chicken. Not had that for a month

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 8:57, archived)
Mongy x

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 9:02, archived)
Alright vlad my man.

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 9:18, archived)
top right is a horsey
www2.b3ta.com/host/creative/98726/1783845239/FriedChickenSet.jpg
(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 9:31, archived)
yesssss that's what I saw

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 10:23, archived)

kentucky freud chicken...it's motherfuckin' good
(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 10:23, archived)
Oh vg

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 12:13, archived)
I heard it somewhere, I didn't make this up, f everyone's i

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 22:02, archived)
I read it in a book of funny graffiti examples that my parents had about 35 years ago, hth

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 9:02, archived)
Confirmed, it was one of Nigel Rees's books
stronglang.wordpress.com/2016/09/12/before-twitter-there-were-reess-pieces/
(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 9:07, archived)
dead birds wearing a disguise

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 11:28, archived)
Ooh I like it
Chicken Zorro
(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 11:48, archived)
they're tiny little corpses vlad, people eat them, I'm serious, I've seen proof

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 12:53, archived)
aiiiieeee

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 13:03, archived)
I'm moving house and packing all my shit.
Failing miserably to do life laundry and declutter

but I have given away my accordion :(
(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 9:30, archived)
^shit-packer

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 9:38, archived)
don't move the house, just take your stuff and go somewhere else

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 11:29, archived)
shush you

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 15:02, archived)
mild bullying :(

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 15:15, archived)
I thought of 'Intuney Hopkins' last night for that album drop thing.

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 9:34, archived)
I’d have gone with Silence of the Brahms

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 10:02, archived)
The Elephant Man Parrish

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 10:18, archived)
👍🏻

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 17:47, archived)
Lindsey Won't-see-another-dayham

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 9:39, archived)
Lindsey Grave-ham

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 11:16, archived)
50p+

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 12:13, archived)
-p +c

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 12:46, archived)
Farewell to Lindsay 'maybe they'll make a deal if you hurt them enough' Graham, may he rest in peace

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 12:49, archived)
They think it's all Olaf

(, Sat 11 Jul 2026, 22:42, archived)
Garbage were fucking amazing, fuck whatever this football is

(, Sat 11 Jul 2026, 23:19, archived)
Oh right, it's on now.
Hope you all enjoy it. Wife's watching Pretty Woman on BBC1, one of her favourites despite it appearing to be an immensely weird, creepy film about rich men controlling female sex slaves.
(, Sat 11 Jul 2026, 23:57, archived)
What's wrong with being sexy?

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 1:17, archived)
what's wrong with being slave-y?

(, Mon 13 Jul 2026, 0:19, archived)
It's a terrific film, end of

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 7:51, archived)
It is now!

(, Sun 12 Jul 2026, 7:50, archived)

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