
And decided to draw this

Click to enbiggen and nudify
Couldnt be assed to colour it properly though.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 23:00,
archived)

Click to enbiggen and nudify
Couldnt be assed to colour it properly though.

but her i find her lack of pubes disturbing
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 23:02,
archived)

everything i know about women i learnt from playing with barbies
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 23:04,
archived)

As the shape and position of her boobs :s
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 23:09,
archived)

comes from surname being Spencer and used to be a punk and I guess ..like to spunk. been my online nick for 10 years now
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 23:17,
archived)

some cunt would have coloured it for you sooner or later
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 23:04,
archived)

This female human contains no insertion slot.
Female human 2.0 will contain insertion slot.
Upgrade costs £3,000.
Buy upgrade?:
Y/N
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 23:07,
archived)
Female human 2.0 will contain insertion slot.
Upgrade costs £3,000.
Buy upgrade?:
Y/N

Sounds like an extra feature for that Femskin stuff in the newsletter
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 23:08,
archived)

Newsletter subscription expired.
Renew subscription?:
Y/N
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 23:11,
archived)
Renew subscription?:
Y/N

You can just click the Newsletter link at the top.
Unless it's just a joke in which case I haven't slept properly in a month so I'm more than a little slow at the moment...
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 23:12,
archived)
Unless it's just a joke in which case I haven't slept properly in a month so I'm more than a little slow at the moment...

And it was just a joke. I ain't really a computer.
I recommend sleep, it's endorsed by all the politicians.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 23:15,
archived)
I recommend sleep, it's endorsed by all the politicians.

I should should write for the Sun, but having 5 CSEs, I am probably over qualified.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:55,
archived)

..there are still some lazy shits out there that have'nt read it!
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:52,
archived)

Two, to be precise.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 23:04,
archived)

Tiberiusgracchus: Well you're fucked now!
badum-TISH.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:46,
archived)
badum-TISH.


that I stole and made more SHAKEY
:D
because I like it when things shake in a suggestive manner, because I have issues
:D
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:48,
archived)
:D
because I like it when things shake in a suggestive manner, because I have issues
:D

davew27 is going to punch you in the gun turrets, Sat 21 Jul, 22:50
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:51,
archived)

It's going to have to be a lock of hair.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:46,
archived)

*selects bossa nova*
Yeah! bontempi kicks ass!
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:48,
archived)
Yeah! bontempi kicks ass!

We got all the fucking cowbels!
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:51,
archived)

but thats taking the piss.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:45,
archived)

Get it wrong and it's just not funny.
EDIT: Oh, he's ok...fair enough
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:43,
archived)
EDIT: Oh, he's ok...fair enough

When the time's right, say random stuff.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:44,
archived)

a ha!
Throb sprocket cock hammer burst punnet!
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:49,
archived)
Throb sprocket cock hammer burst punnet!

Lemurs Dick Doggy Waggle Numpty Oaf Fucker
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:51,
archived)

blunder gusset horse strap pigeon trumpet spoon wagon
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:52,
archived)

I ate my hamster's mother and went to the Co-op to get a new dresser but they had a fire so I rubbed up against a lampost and spluffed on a dead wig.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:54,
archived)

then my leg was throbbing so I opened the window and a small urchin looked up at me and said "How cuntarse have your got any your fucking speed like cos I'm fucking going fucking mental like bexcause it's all fucking going fucking like fucking" and then he burst slowly from the legs upwards spurting guts and juices all over the road and the workmen weren't happy because they had been digging up the road for no apparent reason to watch it slowly fill with rain from the dead reindeer that were leaking from their mighty blunderbus and operating a variety of different coloured lights for the confusion of the passing 747 airliner which had an urgent delivery of air that had to arrive AM but was late and as such would arrive at exactly 1:37pm the next day, resulting in a fine for such tardyness.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:58,
archived)

and i saw santa claus molesting someone behind the desk at vodafone and was all weird because his spunk was all blue and it went in my dog's eyes and he cried like a sheep so i went and dug him a grave made out of jelly and i saw eddie izzard so i ate his nose but no matter what i done my dog was still dead so i jumped into the sewers and wrote a series of bestselling books about a boy wizard who in the end gets laid with his best friend's sister and the funniest thing is that she drinks bisto.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 23:01,
archived)

but marcus!! why do you say this!! marcuuuuuus marcussususeuesusese!
anyway, I was at the musuem and the fishtank exploded and there was fish and bulbs everywhere in amsterdam and it got bit in half and there was some kind of train going around in circles and I asked the man "What the fuck man?" and he shrugged his shoulders of mutton and they flew away into the sunrise and it was really heart warming because of the temperature and they cooked in their own juices so this guy caught them in his huge net in his back pocket and they poured gravy all over them and I rubbed them a bit and they quite liked it so I rubbed them again but the police arrived and I got arrested for indecent exposure and they said F-STOP! and took pictures and like I had to stand around different objects pretending that I was pointing them out but I wasn't really it was all a joke and we laughed over cakes a cucumber sandwiches because cucumbers are quite funny animals the way they just spin around when you tie them to a gate but if you tie them up too tightly they die in the heat.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 23:12,
archived)
anyway, I was at the musuem and the fishtank exploded and there was fish and bulbs everywhere in amsterdam and it got bit in half and there was some kind of train going around in circles and I asked the man "What the fuck man?" and he shrugged his shoulders of mutton and they flew away into the sunrise and it was really heart warming because of the temperature and they cooked in their own juices so this guy caught them in his huge net in his back pocket and they poured gravy all over them and I rubbed them a bit and they quite liked it so I rubbed them again but the police arrived and I got arrested for indecent exposure and they said F-STOP! and took pictures and like I had to stand around different objects pretending that I was pointing them out but I wasn't really it was all a joke and we laughed over cakes a cucumber sandwiches because cucumbers are quite funny animals the way they just spin around when you tie them to a gate but if you tie them up too tightly they die in the heat.

completely composed of dead Princess Diana jokes. Five minutes after the crash. In Paris. In an underpass. In a white Fiat Uno.
*may be Armando Iannucci joke
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:47,
archived)
*may be Armando Iannucci joke

it still doesn't make sense!
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:50,
archived)

Woo!
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:45,
archived)

He looks so forlorn:(
I love hedgehogs...
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:45,
archived)
I love hedgehogs...

this is disturbing...
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:47,
archived)

I wish I deserved that :)
It's just text on a picture... yes, the picture is genuine.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:35,
archived)
It's just text on a picture... yes, the picture is genuine.

That's like telling all the girls in the club not to worry, that bluge in your trousers is only a pair of socks.
;-0 I'm only joking, chuff.
*bounces around to the Locamotion*
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:37,
archived)
;-0 I'm only joking, chuff.
*bounces around to the Locamotion*

Would have been a great 'Wrigleys.. great to taste, even better to share" parody :)
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:37,
archived)

Homoeroticawoo.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:37,
archived)

during the night shift... different text.
The pic has been posted elsewhere, although I've never seen anyone else post it here :)
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:35,
archived)
The pic has been posted elsewhere, although I've never seen anyone else post it here :)

the elite Deutschermannimmannthrobbingrückseitigeschmerzgibt regiment
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:34,
archived)

Jeff Buckley is my fucking god.
And yet this made me chuckle.
I guess I'm just evil...
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:47,
archived)
And yet this made me chuckle.
I guess I'm just evil...

yet cried when he died.
does that make me an evil softy?
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 23:01,
archived)
does that make me an evil softy?

I got it all arse over tip, I was too young to know about him when he was alive, and I only found out he was dead after I'd fallen in love with Grace after recommendation from a mate, and THEN I cried.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 23:04,
archived)

(unless I am missing something... )
Yay!
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:33,
archived)
Yay!

i don't think i've said that yet.
psst... it's copyright, unless that was intentional?
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:37,
archived)
psst... it's copyright, unless that was intentional?

Aces High Lorry oil doesn't. Apart from the brand name I recreated the whole thing.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:47,
archived)

yah mo burn this place to the ground
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:17,
archived)

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bernard_Ingham
but it would've been funny
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:22,
archived)
but it would've been funny

think prescott but tory and not quite so stupid
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:28,
archived)

and his pipe's had the dick!
EDIT: There we are!

( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:15,
archived)
EDIT: There we are!


I'll tell you!
with a mllnlmlgnlgmlgnlg
and a mllgnlgmlgmlmglmg
give a mlmlnglmlgmlgmlg
with the mlmlgnlgmlgmglgnlngnlg
and that's how it's always in place
*chorus*
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:25,
archived)
with a mllnlmlgnlgmlgnlg
and a mllgnlgmlgmlmglmg
give a mlmlnglmlgmlgmlg
with the mlmlgnlgmlgmglgnlngnlg
and that's how it's always in place
*chorus*

My Perogative by Bobby Brown was on the radio a minute ago.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:30,
archived)

but now im just getting carried away
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:34,
archived)

Hey there, people, I'm Bobby Brown they say I'm the cutest boy in town
My car is fast, my teeth is shiney I tell all the girls they can kiss my heinie
Here I am at a famous school I'm dressin' sharp and I'm actin' cool
I got a cheerleader here wants to help with my paper I'll let her do all the work 'n' maybe later I'll rape her...
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:34,
archived)
My car is fast, my teeth is shiney I tell all the girls they can kiss my heinie
Here I am at a famous school I'm dressin' sharp and I'm actin' cool
I got a cheerleader here wants to help with my paper I'll let her do all the work 'n' maybe later I'll rape her...

with a rubber head
dives onto the floor
straight out of bed
rubber chin
and rubber jaw
rubber rubber rubber
he's vulcanised for sure!
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:28,
archived)
dives onto the floor
straight out of bed
rubber chin
and rubber jaw
rubber rubber rubber
he's vulcanised for sure!

www.b3ta.com/questions/teenagerebellion/post85486/
I hope it wins.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:59,
archived)
I hope it wins.
![Challenge Entry: Bad Books for Kids [challenge entry]](/images/board_posticon_c.gif)
...is all you need

click for big (135k)
mofaha supplied the cut out tiggerman. not that i've done it justice
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:03,
archived)

click for big (135k)
mofaha supplied the cut out tiggerman. not that i've done it justice

www.b3tards.com/u/15fa5bbfc7346f21c0c5/yiffalo-stupidfast.gif
(linked so as not to gobble bandwidth)
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:06,
archived)
(linked so as not to gobble bandwidth)

now I have ragtime music in my head
and it's not even my time of the month!
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:31,
archived)
and it's not even my time of the month!

though i had trouble making him look non-photographic without looking rubbish
i gave up in the end
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:14,
archived)
i gave up in the end

but his lack of full legs counted against that
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:20,
archived)

need new glasses come to spec savers....
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:02,
archived)


but if i did i'd like to be able to look around and still see what im looking at, instead of my line of sight going outside the glasses or indeed looking at the frame
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:15,
archived)


I love 'the monk' really

Giant fucking poster of it. I just broke down laughing on the floor. People had no idea what was so funny.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:03,
archived)

They changed the Transformers if you're a fan of the old stuff but the action is fantastic.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:05,
archived)

*saw first 30 minutes on a borked divx*
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:07,
archived)

If you only saw the first 30 mins you won't have heard Optimus say the crucial line :p
The people next to me almost cried when he did.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:11,
archived)
The people next to me almost cried when he did.

could it be.......
"Autobots! Transform an......"
i cant even finish it, i may spoil it in my head
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:16,
archived)
"Autobots! Transform an......"
i cant even finish it, i may spoil it in my head

"At the end of this day, one of us will stand..."
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:21,
archived)

I remember them when they was new.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:21,
archived)

They aint bad books, but they aren't Jennings or Artemis Fowl either.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 21:43,
archived)

I want a complete set of the Johnny Red Hat etcs for my kids too. When I have them.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 21:47,
archived)

either way fucking right.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 21:56,
archived)

But I just finished the book:P
'ning b3ta this is why I've been shirking my b3terage today.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 21:46,
archived)
'ning b3ta this is why I've been shirking my b3terage today.

Once I got the hang of it I couldn't be arsed to stop:P
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 21:49,
archived)

I can't even be bothered to watch the film
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 21:48,
archived)

The butler did it, then he woke up to discover that her was actually an accountant from Woking.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 21:48,
archived)

If so, can you quote that passage?
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 21:51,
archived)

But I'm fairly sure Harry and Ginny would have if Ron hadn't have stormed in.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 21:52,
archived)

'Oh Harry. Is that a wand in your pocket or you just pleased to see me?'
'Oh' Ginny'
'Oh Harry''Oh' Ginny'
'Oh Harry''Oh' Ginny'
'Oh Harry''Oh' Ginny'
'Oh Harry''Oh' Ginny'
'Oh Harry''Oh' Ginny'
'Oh Harry'
'Anyone want a cuppa?'
'Aaaaw mum!'
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 21:54,
archived)
'Oh' Ginny'
'Oh Harry''Oh' Ginny'
'Oh Harry''Oh' Ginny'
'Oh Harry''Oh' Ginny'
'Oh Harry''Oh' Ginny'
'Oh Harry''Oh' Ginny'
'Oh Harry'
'Anyone want a cuppa?'
'Aaaaw mum!'

Come on, I can't be bothered to read the rest of it, I just want the naughty bits.
Like most books I read. IT was made much better by Beverley's sex life.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 21:55,
archived)
Like most books I read. IT was made much better by Beverley's sex life.

But I'm fairly sure the JK didn't do any Mills and Boon:P
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 21:56,
archived)

When he grows up, I bet Harry proposes that Hermione shares in his 'cupboard' fetish.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 21:57,
archived)

And go down to Slimelights.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:00,
archived)

single sex dorms and now he has to deal with unisex toilets...
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:02,
archived)

Didn't hear Harry moaning about the Bacon sarnies!
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 22:15,
archived)

Harry and the Dark Lord Voldemort are having a fight in a huge castle in the clouds, their light-sabers I mean wands are clashing in eh darkness, the fight is fierce and the Dark Lord Voldemort cut of Harry’s hand and he drops his light-saber I mean wand (sorry about that) and crawls to the edge of a high parapet. While the fight is going on Princess Leah, sorry I mean Hermione – who is Harry’s sister, not that either of them realize yet – is with Ron Solo who has just been frozen in crystal and is being taken away by a bounty hunter….. As Harry hangs on the parapet the Dark Lord Voldemort holds his hand out to him and asks him to stand by his side and they will become the strongest force in the universe and Harry says “no” and tells the Darth Lord Voldemort that he killed his father and the Dark Lord Voldemort says:-
“Luke, I mean Harry, I am your father……..”
And everyone who reads the book will say “Wow! What a surprise that was, I would never have guessed that was going to happen, what an original idea that was, I wonder where she got the idea from….” And in a turn of incredible irony George Lucas will be asked to direct the last film..
And if the book doesn’t end this way it is because J. R. R. Rowling changed her mind, you may find that the book ends with Harry finding a gold ring in a cave and when he puts it on he becomes invisible and that starts the rise of the Dark Lord Voldemort in his tower near mount doom….ummmm! That sounds familiar, where have I heard that before? Oh! Yes, it is the plot for Star Wars….Perhaps then Harry and Hermione and Ron will be asked by an old man to go with them in a yellow submarine to Pepper Land to save the world from the blue meanies, and they do so by singing songs from the sities….ummmm! That sounds familiar, of course that was the plot for Lord of the Rings….
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 21:50,
archived)
“Luke, I mean Harry, I am your father……..”
And everyone who reads the book will say “Wow! What a surprise that was, I would never have guessed that was going to happen, what an original idea that was, I wonder where she got the idea from….” And in a turn of incredible irony George Lucas will be asked to direct the last film..
And if the book doesn’t end this way it is because J. R. R. Rowling changed her mind, you may find that the book ends with Harry finding a gold ring in a cave and when he puts it on he becomes invisible and that starts the rise of the Dark Lord Voldemort in his tower near mount doom….ummmm! That sounds familiar, where have I heard that before? Oh! Yes, it is the plot for Star Wars….Perhaps then Harry and Hermione and Ron will be asked by an old man to go with them in a yellow submarine to Pepper Land to save the world from the blue meanies, and they do so by singing songs from the sities….ummmm! That sounds familiar, of course that was the plot for Lord of the Rings….

And a couple of Austin Allegros.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 21:51,
archived)

Is this the E.U. or Gordon Brown gone mad with his new found power?
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 21:49,
archived)

i believe it was first set out by god in a dream to st francis of assisi
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 21:57,
archived)

can somebody tell me the end and spoil the whole book, please
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 21:56,
archived)

The one on right looks dubious and the one of the left looks down right scared..
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 21:39,
archived)

(you should reshoot that pic with fingers at each end of the plate ;))
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 21:35,
archived)

if this is anything to go by...
news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/edinburgh_and_east/6897494.stm
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 21:34,
archived)
news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/edinburgh_and_east/6897494.stm

(and not in the fun way..)
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 21:37,
archived)

i think my number plate is more offensive with the first two letters being 'BJ'.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 21:47,
archived)

Tomorrow you should watch Pi.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 21:19,
archived)

needs blurrrrrrr!
EDIT: JL is amazing!
EDIT ^2: Pi is woo - haven't seen it in ages.
( ,
Sat 21 Jul 2007, 21:19,
archived)
EDIT: JL is amazing!
EDIT ^2: Pi is woo - haven't seen it in ages.
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