hold the line
(
Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 20:42,
archived)
thats f'ing smashingone of your best I would say
(
HappyToast Groat froth,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 20:50,
archived)
Love is not ugly, like pus, and lice, and tobacco snotwoo, I say
Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 21:00,
archived)
So much eeeeurgh in one picture!
Crystal Magnet Like a diamond geezer, but better,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 20:38,
archived)
I mean, if I wanted to look at ball sacks I'd half-close my eyes and look at Gordon Ramsey's face.
(
Crystal Magnet Like a diamond geezer, but better,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 20:40,
archived)
I'm pleased to hear it.Are you sure you don't secretly find his wrinkes erotic?
( Crystal Magnet Like a diamond geezer, but better,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 20:44,
archived)
NoThey remind me of my flaps after a long episode of Masterchef. That Gregg Wallace...
(,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 20:46,
archived)
me neitherand that's really saying something
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 20:46,
archived)
he said it hurts a lotand he won't be doing it again
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 21:08,
archived)
I didn't even notice the nutsacksI was enamored of that wonderful set of buttocks on that female...
(
HairyTwatter certified eel and sodium salesman,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 21:36,
archived)
he's not a superherohe's just a toy :(
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 20:28,
archived)
this got a lol from me i'll admitmostly just for reminding me of stretch armstrong though
(
ms morbo lorem ipsum dolor sit amet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 20:37,
archived)
hahahI'm now picturing Jim Carrey in Man on the moon doing a mime to "Here I come to save the day" :)
(,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 20:45,
archived)
ahhhahhhhahhhahhahI would actually like to see this
Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 20:22,
archived)
what am I missing?the pain in my right eye is clearly effecting my ability to see lols
( HappyToast Groat froth,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 20:29,
archived)
Not sure. Blade in Zulu? A vampire antihero in a film about british colonialism... no. No idea. The Alchemist king of the needlessly complicated,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 20:31,
archived)
things would have turned a bit differentlyfucking imperialist rapists
Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 21:01,
archived)
i don't know, tbhthe pic just amuses me
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 20:43,
archived)
Pffft :D
(
xihpete A neutrino walks straight through a bar, with v>c.,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 20:07,
archived)
daredevil isn't really blindsee, he's got tunnel vision
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 20:09,
archived)
did this a while ago
not happy with some of teh clone stamps, but anyway...
tubaman,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 21:13,
archived)
![[challenge entry]](/images/board_posticon_c.gif "Challenge Entry: Superheroes in History"){kind=small}
Batman saves the dayand Jesus goes home in his UFO, a few days later.
(,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:56,
archived)
bloody sidekicks!you just can't rely on them!
isn't that right, boy chimpy?
boy chimpy? where are you?
(isn't that right, boy chimpy?
boy chimpy? where are you?
Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 20:01,
archived)
that damn boy chimpyalways causing trouble for those who rely on him
(,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 20:06,
archived)
i save him from a life of banana-based povertyand this is how he repays me
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 20:08,
archived)
Quick and dirty
and not particularly relevant.
littlefish I like cheese,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:55,
archived)
"S" for super?
monstrinho do biscoito teeeshurts = www.nogunarmy.com,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:34,
archived)
YupYou should see the carbon backbone diagram for 'helicopterene'.
(,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:36,
archived)
Unless you count GODHe created Heaven, Earth, Amino Acids, cheese and sunglasses. In that order.
(
Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:35,
archived)
he never invented spider laddersi invented those
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:35,
archived)
and sandwichesthey were invented by the Earl of Crisps
( monstrinho do biscoito teeeshurts = www.nogunarmy.com,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:37,
archived)
and ice cream soup
(
Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:40,
archived)
That's not an amino acid.Given a color scheme of {Green=N, Red=H, Black=C, Blue=O} that is errr ... 7-nitro-heptri-2, 4, 6-ene carboxylic acid? Oh, and E/Z/E for the double bond configurations.
( The Alchemist king of the needlessly complicated,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 20:16,
archived)
"you're right, alfred, it is a bit on the small side"
(
Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:24,
archived)
couldn't resist
(
Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:35,
archived)
Hmmm, trying to work out how to put a helmet on a puffer fish...It's not bloody easy.
(
Mu Dinofiddler,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:30,
archived)
use a colanderall that metal helmety goodness, with added holes for spikes
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:32,
archived)
That would be good if it wasn't a space faring puffer fish. Mu Dinofiddler,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:35,
archived)
add a fishbowl
(
Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:36,
archived)
Start with the chin strap . . .
Valin I changed glasses while I wasn't looking,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:33,
archived)
Ahahah, that's great. But it needs to be a full head dealy for space flight.I might have to do a facemask attached to his space suit.
( Mu Dinofiddler,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:38,
archived)
Plowed asunder . . . Valin I changed glasses while I wasn't looking,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:28,
archived)
New from JMLDo you seek sexual fun while cycling? Seek no more with
Plugseat from JML
Avaliable from Woolworths while windows hold out
Get yours now
(Plugseat from JML
Avaliable from Woolworths while windows hold out
Get yours now
hooker1uk Filth monger of the lowest degree!,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:19,
archived)
do they sell them in full size?
(
Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:24,
archived)
read that as smell them Valin I changed glasses while I wasn't looking,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:29,
archived)
when it comes to sexmy nose isn't the first body part that springs to mind
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:32,
archived)
I think they come in 4 sizesVarying from Training to 2 goatse,
they also come with built in lube, made from wasp blood
(they also come with built in lube, made from wasp blood
hooker1uk Filth monger of the lowest degree!,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:32,
archived)
The House of the Dead 2I've always been a fan of the House of the Dead series, growing up as I did in the arcades of cinemas and bowling alleys, shunting pound after pound into the machines just so I could shoot some more decaying shit. Marvelous.
I used to love them as a lad for obvious reasons, and upon buying a dreamcast for a friend at university and finding that The House of the Dead 2 was part of the package, me and said friend jumped at the opportunity to shoot the shit out of some necrophilic Italians (the game's set in Venice). However, upon playing the game a few times it became the greatest in-joke of my uni years. We'd go out dressed as characters from the game, and quote their few lines incessantly and to our considerable social detriment. The reason was because the games dialogue and story are absolutely hilarious: allow me to briefly outline the plot.
James Taylor (not the folk singer) and Gary Stewart are driving in Venice to 'meet G' - one of the protagonists from the first game. Suddenly, they are attacked by a flying imp who claims to have 'taken care of G'. You are then attacked by zombies. NICE SETUP GUYS!
You then find G, fight the imp and a giant headless ax-wielding knight called, inexplicably, 'KUARL', and meet your back-up for the mission - Harry Harris and Amy Crystal - who tell you that 'the chaos in the situation is increasing' and that you must 'prevent the chaos'.
You then find out who is behind the zombie holocaust: a man, the legend, called GOLDMAN. His voice actor is utterly atrocious, failing miserably to portray a mentally unhinged eugenicist/christian fundementalist/whatever the fuck it is he believes in. He is, we are told, and I quote verbatim: 'The head one of the most eminent financial groups, and an expert on the genome theory'.
THE HEAD ONE OF THE MOST EMINENT FINANCIAL GROUPS? SHIT!
As you progress, you fight a series of bosses named after tarot cards - the amphibian Hierophant who, we are told by news reports, has 'TAKEN...the city'; the chainsaw wielding STRENGTH; and the Hydra-like TOWER - before fighting them all...again. INNOVATIVE STUFF, Wow entertainment. Anyway, for the entire game you never know GOLDMAN's motives for trying to turn the world into zombies. The closest you get is his exposition during the finale of the game, where he explains:
'Man committed a sin. The original sin that man is responsible to! To protect the life cycle!'
After this speech, you fight the creature he makes 'to rule over nature and 'to hate and destroy mankind', before Goldman kills himself. Hilariously, when playing the game, the two characters have a little discourse where Gary Stewart says to James Taylor:
'James, did we really do the right thing?'
What, by saving the world from a zombie clusterfuck? PROFOUND.
They then ludicrously say 'goodbye' to Goldman. 'Goodbye, Goldman!'. Seriously, it is a goldmine for massive damage internet lols. Having explained that, you can now enjoy the ATROCIOUS voice acting present in the game in the following video:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=aAWxw0wmeNQ
Gloriously, someone has placed all of the best quotes on wikiquote, which never, ever fails to make me smile:
en.wikiquote.org/wiki/The_House_of_the_Dead_2
I hope this brings enjoyment to anyone else who's ever played this game aat any point in their lives.
(,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:13,
archived)
I used to love them as a lad for obvious reasons, and upon buying a dreamcast for a friend at university and finding that The House of the Dead 2 was part of the package, me and said friend jumped at the opportunity to shoot the shit out of some necrophilic Italians (the game's set in Venice). However, upon playing the game a few times it became the greatest in-joke of my uni years. We'd go out dressed as characters from the game, and quote their few lines incessantly and to our considerable social detriment. The reason was because the games dialogue and story are absolutely hilarious: allow me to briefly outline the plot.
James Taylor (not the folk singer) and Gary Stewart are driving in Venice to 'meet G' - one of the protagonists from the first game. Suddenly, they are attacked by a flying imp who claims to have 'taken care of G'. You are then attacked by zombies. NICE SETUP GUYS!
You then find G, fight the imp and a giant headless ax-wielding knight called, inexplicably, 'KUARL', and meet your back-up for the mission - Harry Harris and Amy Crystal - who tell you that 'the chaos in the situation is increasing' and that you must 'prevent the chaos'.
You then find out who is behind the zombie holocaust: a man, the legend, called GOLDMAN. His voice actor is utterly atrocious, failing miserably to portray a mentally unhinged eugenicist/christian fundementalist/whatever the fuck it is he believes in. He is, we are told, and I quote verbatim: 'The head one of the most eminent financial groups, and an expert on the genome theory'.
THE HEAD ONE OF THE MOST EMINENT FINANCIAL GROUPS? SHIT!
As you progress, you fight a series of bosses named after tarot cards - the amphibian Hierophant who, we are told by news reports, has 'TAKEN...the city'; the chainsaw wielding STRENGTH; and the Hydra-like TOWER - before fighting them all...again. INNOVATIVE STUFF, Wow entertainment. Anyway, for the entire game you never know GOLDMAN's motives for trying to turn the world into zombies. The closest you get is his exposition during the finale of the game, where he explains:
'Man committed a sin. The original sin that man is responsible to! To protect the life cycle!'
After this speech, you fight the creature he makes 'to rule over nature and 'to hate and destroy mankind', before Goldman kills himself. Hilariously, when playing the game, the two characters have a little discourse where Gary Stewart says to James Taylor:
'James, did we really do the right thing?'
What, by saving the world from a zombie clusterfuck? PROFOUND.
They then ludicrously say 'goodbye' to Goldman. 'Goodbye, Goldman!'. Seriously, it is a goldmine for massive damage internet lols. Having explained that, you can now enjoy the ATROCIOUS voice acting present in the game in the following video:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=aAWxw0wmeNQ
Gloriously, someone has placed all of the best quotes on wikiquote, which never, ever fails to make me smile:
en.wikiquote.org/wiki/The_House_of_the_Dead_2
I hope this brings enjoyment to anyone else who's ever played this game aat any point in their lives.
edit: Hello new person. Please read our FAQ. Cheers.
what the fuck is going on tonight?
this deserves my largest failham
(what the fuck is going on tonight?
this deserves my largest failham
Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something.,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:13,
archived)
isn't that cute?BUT IT'S WRONG!
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:14,
archived)
you juuuuuuust missedtalk is the next one over
12 days should be sufficiant for getting the basics of pic/talk/links layout, really now.
(12 days should be sufficiant for getting the basics of pic/talk/links layout, really now.
ms morbo lorem ipsum dolor sit amet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:14,
archived)
you appear to have misunderstood how this messageboard functions
(
mictoboy shitting in your cunt since,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:14,
archived)
this is your lifeyou spam the board
Monkey dies as a result
Now go spam the links board thank you
(Monkey dies as a result
Now go spam the links board thank you
hooker1uk Filth monger of the lowest degree!,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:16,
archived)
fuck that's a bit good Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 20:24,
archived)
My entire family died in a "House of the Dead 2" related incidentyou insensitive bastard.
( Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:21,
archived)
hahaawesome, in the original meaning of causing awe.
( monstrinho do biscoito teeeshurts = www.nogunarmy.com,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:30,
archived)
i would wear this to a funeralseriously
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:33,
archived)
Awww, Mu, you missed me! Mu you missed me!I just saw the stats board and I am thoroughly ashamed of myself for not posting more.
( wuffle, the b3ta bunny 's flea collar isn't working on,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:44,
archived)
Now show him stop John Wilkes Booth's bullet! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:33,
archived)
super amoeba!
(
Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:12,
archived)
yup further back than mine
monstrinho do biscoito teeeshurts = www.nogunarmy.com,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:30,
archived)
:)
supervillian..but who cares :)
prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:04,
archived)
i don't carei prefer supervillains!
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:05,
archived)
I want to see WATL's postOf the evil genius who has tied a man to the train tracks.
In sepia colours and the flickery film noise.
(In sepia colours and the flickery film noise.
xihpete A neutrino walks straight through a bar, with v>c.,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:06,
archived)
I'm not entirely sure of the reference (other than Batman obviously)But very nicely :D
( xihpete A neutrino walks straight through a bar, with v>c.,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:07,
archived)
just a vietnam photograph I found, thought I'd give it a go.. prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:09,
archived)
For a' youse Scottish Fowks
BadBadman saw an incorrect comma placement on,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:01,
archived)
bindundown there
*points*
(*points*
Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:04,
archived)
don't tell everyone!it ruins the surprise!
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:18,
archived)
sorryi shall go and spank myself. should have checked.
( BadBadman saw an incorrect comma placement on,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:11,
archived)
i can spank you, if you likeor even if you don't like
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:19,
archived)
it was for ITVso real but not strictly trufax real
( hooker1uk Filth monger of the lowest degree!,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:05,
archived)
wasn't this for an ITV programand been around the internet a dozen times already.
( hooker1uk Filth monger of the lowest degree!,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:04,
archived)
darnit i missed a dozen. you can keep that one hooker1uk Filth monger of the lowest degree!,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:08,
archived)
You can see the microphone thing above the coffin. Mu Dinofiddler,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:07,
archived)
exacltyplus i think i've seen this on digital spy too
( hooker1uk Filth monger of the lowest degree!,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:09,
archived)
it isn'tit's part of a new ITV sitcom about a Vicar
( Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something.,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:17,
archived)
I made thesesome printable and customable Drinks Cards to communicate the beverages you want in a noisy bar or club. I'm trying to get a sample image on but can't do it.
bit.ly/DrinksCards
(,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 18:49,
archived)
bit.ly/DrinksCards
and I uploaded the image on B3tards but can't get it across to here (?)
(,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 18:50,
archived)
------>dragons den is in links
this place is arties only
(this place is arties only
ms morbo lorem ipsum dolor sit amet,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 18:52,
archived)
Nah mate this is the main board, Links is two doors down
(
Gawain the oven safe flan tin willy bum fart poo,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 18:52,
archived)
heres my way of explaining itlook under the code b3tards gave you,there will be grey writing saying "Firefox users will need to change some security settings to let javascript muck about with their clipboard."
copy the part of code that starts above the "with" on that message its should start with a greater sign, and img.
(,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 18:55,
archived)
copy the part of code that starts above the "with" on that message its should start with a greater sign, and img.
just shout and pointlike the rest of us do
( Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something.,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 19:15,
archived)
just stop going to wanky, loud student barsand go to proper pubs. They hear you just fine in those.
(
FredAstaireAteMyTapShoes but he left me this fetching ballgown,
Thu 4 Mar 2010, 20:09,
archived)
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