A failure at being fussy
A lot of things I don't like because they just look or sound suspicious: how can anyone trust brocolli, cabbage, sprouts, aubergine, olives, anchovies or spinach, in fact most sketchy looking, green vegetable things?

Occasionally I get tricked into eating some marvellous concoction, often cooked by friends with a flare for cooking, only to discover that it has some highly suspicious vegetables in it *after* I've declared how tasty it is. So now I can eat aubergine, courgette, spinach and actually like the taste of them, as long they aren't too visibly recognisable.

Sprouts, however, can fuck right off. And olives, though I'm making a determined effort lately to like them by trying them every so often. They still taste like little salty grapes of doom though, the manky little fuckers.
( LemonEntryMyDearWatson This time, Moriarty, the hand is on the other foot, Fri 2 Mar 2007, 1:17, Reply)

One bloke I went to uni with
Lovely chap on my course at uni- good crack, liked a beer, but as he was from Yorkshire; "Wouldn't eat anything ending in the letter A," as "It's all foreign muck."
(greenycrimson I stole the from pyschotherapist, Fri 2 Mar 2007, 1:09, Reply)

So it's milk right? But it's kinda gone off?
Yes it's that wonderful substance we all call cheese. Or as I have decided it's called, the evil yellow substance of doom.

'cept I'm convinced I'm going to like it eventually. Based on the following stories,

A wee bit of backstory, my dad's French, so from a young age I happily ate stuff like cheese, pate and all the other wonderful delicacies of the world. I was happy in my obliv..i...arity (don't check, it's a real word).

And then there's this period of my life where it all went to pot. I can remember oh so many strange situations:

Milk.

Yeah oddly enough I was never one for milk at first. It's got a bit of a crap taste you've got to admit, and it's not exactly the most well endorsed product (comes from cows boobs, has beasties in it which we think we've killed all of with deadly science). Back in primary school we had milk that parents could buy for their kids, and one day we had a spare. So the teacher like any good one decides to do a competition to see who gets it. I'm sure there was some brain usage, and being the smart like sprong I was I won. 'cept I'd forgetten I didn't like milk. Cue me attempting to not gag, and the teacher kicking the verbal shit out of me (or so it felt when you're 5).

End result, these days I love some milk on my cereal and I'm getting used to it on it's own.

--

Onion.

Onion's a bit of an odd one. On it's own it's like nature's z-list celebrity. It's always popping up everywhere, but it's never actually the reason you're there. Burgers, salads, soup, chilli etc all contain onion for flavouring. So guess who hated onion? Oh sure it was the texture and something else about it (the name maybe, why not call it something dynamic?) but for ages I wouldn't touch onion. We bought onion free burgers, I picked it out of food, and when I went round to a friend's house I sulked because there was onion in the food.

Fast forward to 6 years ago (is that grammatically correct?) and we're sat round the table. "I made sure to get the burgers without onion", pipes up dad. "Oh it's alright, I don't mind it anymore" I reply. The look on his face said it all. Can also now eat red onion in things, before then I was a bit wary of it....because it wasn't actually red. Or some other excuse.

--

Cheese.

Yes it's the title of my post, and you've been no doubt waiting for it. Well done, award yourself a prize. Maybe some crisps, how about that bottle of Hoegarden you've been waiting to buy?

Except cheese is still only half way down. I'll eat it on pizza, pasta (lasangne or parmasan). But if it's on a burger it's a no-no, if it's on toast it can go to hell, and if it's on it's own I'll run away. Which isn't great when your parents love their pongy cheese and you get a Pont l'Eveque in your face. Tears of sadness they are.

Other than that I won't touch:

Mushroom (devil stuff, and with a name beginning with mush and a look like some sort of diseased internal organ can you blame me?)

Courgette (once they're cooked they look vile and drippy)

Tomato (another veggie failure, it's too floppy and gooey inside and tough outside)

As for what I will eat....meat. But that's another story :)
(chuckle_h0und You furnish the pictures, I'll furnish the war, Fri 2 Mar 2007, 0:58, Reply)

Spunkalicious.
/Junket/

Revolting! :(
(Dregen, Fri 2 Mar 2007, 0:58, Reply)

My Brother
As so many vegetarians wear their dietary habits as a militant badge of some kind, ("You carry seven pounds of undigested red meat in your colon at all times") constantly reminding you how lovely the fluffy animals who've suffered for you are ("How can you eat anything with a face?") and spowing endless anti-meat propaganda ("They spray hormones onto the fish so they grow faster, but this leaves them crippled and blind and in constant pain"), it was several years (about 16) before it gradually dawned on me that my incredibly picky brother was in fact a veggie.

In my defence it was buried in with the millions of other things he would not eat while we were children, which included all fruit (and anything fruit flavoured) any non-white bread and any vegetables which weren't potatoes.

In short; a vegetarian who doesn't like vegetables.

So what did he live on? Cheese pizza and marmite sandwiches.

He should be dead, not 6'5" and built like a brick shithouse.
(greenycrimson I stole the from pyschotherapist, Fri 2 Mar 2007, 0:54, Reply)

Just eggs
Its completely a mental thing, totally irrational... Basically I think its because the only time I ever ate an egg as an egg was when I was a little baby and I apparently turned blue and choked... Probably went down the wrong hole but I've not eaten them since.
( beefandcheese, Fri 2 Mar 2007, 0:36, Reply)

Oh, and another
Thankfully I'm not like this now, but some time back I suffered from a gluten intolerance - no, not an allergy like some whiney gits claim as an excuse for not eating something when they really mean "I don't like it" - but a thankfully short-lived (about 2 years) but genuine, very violent reaction to gluten based products (eat something with gluten in it and 5-10 minutes later I'd be sitting on the bog grabbing the walls so I wasn't rocket propelled into the ceiling). Obviously I'd have to steer clear of the obvious things, bread, pasta, biscuits, pizza etc. but they stick gluten (usually flour to thicken things) in virtually anything meaning that I'd often be out for a nice meal and have to disappear from the table bloody sharpish. That and the associated acute indigestion and acid reflux meant for several months I had to sleep sitting up.

That made for a pretty miserable couple of years as anyone who's eaten rice pasta or gluten free biscuits will understand.
( SteamedCleaner, Fri 2 Mar 2007, 0:36, Reply)

Eat shit and die!
Me? Eat anything being a pig!

Twat housemate at Uni would leave plates of cooked food in the fridge/room for weeks till it grew a furry coat so....

We found a small deposit next to the WC and mixed it in with one of his weekly curries left in the fridge, saw him scoff the lot too!

Every time I have a curry now I sometimes wince when I'm chewing a raisin, or is it....?

Oink!
(Mr Pig, Fri 2 Mar 2007, 0:35, Reply)

wotsits
my brother is scared of wotsits he decked the last person who put wotsit dust on him lol
and the only thing im pickey about is
cucumber if i taste it or smell it i will throw up
(harrison89, Fri 2 Mar 2007, 0:30, Reply)

No, you're not allergic.
People who claim to be allergic, or that they can't eat things, when they only have a real or imaginary intolerance are the lowest of the low. Every time one of them claims they are allergic to something that will only make them a bit gassy, they piss someone off and make them more likely not to be careful when someone like my brother is around. My brother is _actually_ allergic to peanuts. Unlike a housemate who claimed to be allergic to them WHILE EATING A WHOLE BAG (they refused to believe this meant they weren't), my brother's throat begins to close up if someone opens a jar of peanut butter in the room. We discovered his allergy when he projectile vomited on a priest after eating a mouthful of nutty fudge. How we laughed, until we had to rush him to hospital for adrenalin so he could breath.

And people tell you the most unbelievable things when you have to bring it up. On holiday, a family next to us by the pool requested a bowl of peanuts for the children to throw to the birds. We asked them to be careful, as said brother was allergic. "Oh," they said, "We think little poppet here is too." as they passed another handful to the child, "but the doctors won't give us an epipen." *$%@ You think your child needs to carry a fucking needle and adrenalin around with them in case they see a peanut? And you're practically smearing them with nutty dust?

Sorry, not funny, but these fucking people could get him killed, and I'd really rather that didn't happen. I wouldn't even care if they thought they were allergic, if they actually took reasonable precautions. More people avoiding peanuts would be a good thing for actual sufferers. But no, they create the impression that a peanut allergy is something that ENABLES YOU TO EAT PEANUTS WITH NO BAD EFFECTS. Or maybe a slight twinge in your tummy, poor pet. And then someone doesn't keep the cake slices seperate and a teenager dies.

I'd... better stop now.
(Skittlemcfluff ......................, Fri 2 Mar 2007, 0:24, Reply)

Hmmm....
A lot of these posts are reinforcing my fears that b3tans are mainly pale, sickly looking creatures plonked in front of a computer and not the vigorously healthy specimens we all think we are.
Anyway, for pickiness, how about my wife's cereal quirk? She'll have a perfectly normal bowl of cereal with milk but not have the milk. She'll take each spoonful of cereal and pour off the milk, leaving just a tiny bit of milky moistness on the cornflakes/muesli/whatever. Not too strange, trouble is, she keeps trying to get me to use her left over milk on my cereal! Yeuch, no thanks!
( SteamedCleaner, Fri 2 Mar 2007, 0:19, Reply)

not that fussy
I will pretty much eat anything, I'll try anything once and even then try it again to make sure I've not just had a dodgy version of it. However some things which I HATE with a passion are:
melon
celery
toasted tea cakes
raisins in curry
HAM AND PINEAPPLE PIZZAS
(anything sweet with something savoury basically, I pick out the pineapple in sweet and sour)

I er also don't eat beef cause I like cows. Shut up.
(lei, Fri 2 Mar 2007, 0:14, Reply)

Custardy Bastard
I knew a chap who claimed that if any even the TINIEST bit of custard touched anything he ate, he would throw up. While he actually often ate custard, we (me et mes chums) thought that he might throw up ffor the attention if we tested him. So we didn't.
However:
One merry day, when all was right in the land, my chum was eating a bowl of custard on pie, and dropped his spoon into the bowl. Custardy Bastard, who was sitting opposite him, got a fine, minute even, splash of custard near his food, and went ballistic. He HURLED his plate at my friend, covering him in sauce, and for the next week acted as though me chum had raped his dog with a novelty porcupine dildo.
A very disturbed mind.
(TheSpode has little toe-hats., Fri 2 Mar 2007, 0:13, Reply)

honestly, i find most of these posts fucking pathetic.
so what if you dont like cheese melted? It's harldy a life threatening problem.

Everyone knows the only uneatable foods are mashed potato and coliflower cheese.
(Orkran Mild Euphoria Ensues, Fri 2 Mar 2007, 0:13, Reply)

My Daughter.... and girlfriend
Sorry if its already bindun.... but come on these 2 girls are 6years old and 20years old so you would have thought things might be different. Here's how a normal conversation on eating something goes :-

Me : Look what ive cooked, something fabulous and tasty and delicous

Daughter : I dont like it

Me : Have you ever tried it before?

Daughter : NO

What more can i say??

PS. Replace the word "daughter" with "girlfriend" for the converstaions i have with the missus :)

PPS. I will never ever on this earth eat any food labelled as organic.... for christ sake i grew up on chemicals ...we need them to survive. Organic food is a scam.... thier trying to make you ill by denying you the chemicals your body needs.... then they'll scrap the NHS and we'll have to buy medical insurance... Damn you Norwich Union and ur organic food:)
(spaceswitch is gonna gay ya, on, Fri 2 Mar 2007, 0:10, Reply)

Red foods
I have trouble eating any red fruits or vegetables as when I was a toddler I had my mouth burnt by hot plums and developed an aversion to them.
(TimChuma, Fri 2 Mar 2007, 0:02, Reply)

Bulls penis tastes of bacon fat.
I'm not especially picky, I'll give anything a shot (I was tricked into eating bulls penis once) but i definately Hate Tabouli, lentils, couscous, rabbit, cougettes/ zuchinies, eggplant/aubergine, and squash.

Mint flavouring makes me very sick, but i have no problems with fresh mint. It does mean, no gum, no lifesavers, no tic tacs, no mint slice, no minted peas, no vicks vapor rub, no creme de menthe, no mint sauce, no mint jelly. I cant even brush my teeth with mint flavoured toothpaste.

I do enjoy mojitos though.
(spent.fish flipping and gasping, Thu 1 Mar 2007, 23:50, Reply)

I am unable to eat pork
it makes my feet hurt.
(Orkran Mild Euphoria Ensues, Thu 1 Mar 2007, 23:47, Reply)

Feeble excuse?
The Artist formerly known as Mrs Steve was a veggie. I managed to convert her to 'happy lamb' after many years because the cutesy little sheeps had a nice life before getting minced up and turned into delicious manfood. Bizarrely she used this veggie nonsense as an excuse for not 'talking to pork'.

Is it any surprise we're not still wed?

Mind you, I won't eat a tuppence either, but have recieved compliments on my facilty to lick them.
(Mr Steve is jobless and fancyfree!, Thu 1 Mar 2007, 23:34, Reply)

Eating in order
I have a slight problem that I eat everything in my plate one item at a time, ie, I'll eat all the carrots, then all the potatoes, then all the peas, etc etc leaving the thing I like the most (for example steak, or lamb) until last and then eat that.

It's a odd thing, and often gets strange looks from people when i've nothing left on my plate but just chicken, or a steak.

I even do the same when eating a balti, eat all the meat, then say mushrooms the mop up what is left with a naan bread.

It's actually starting to annoy me now I think about it.

Length, considerable, it takes me ages.
(Opanoid Look sweats dripping off them, Thu 1 Mar 2007, 23:32, Reply)

Disco Minge
Is NOT pleasant. Most discerning chaps will ensure that their equipment is spotless in event of snap inspection, but one or two ladies do let the side down.

Besides, gentle kissing of the lower lady torso in a southern direction being abruptly followed by a sudden 'Abort! Abort!' and immediate u-turn is not a subtle move.

Unfortunately this emergency maneuover has been performed once or twice. I've been greeted by something which resembled the top of Leo Sayer's (and in one recent case, Boris Johnson's) head and reminded me of the half full tin of Go Cat I left in the fridge that morning.

Honestly, it's all in the presentation....
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 1 Mar 2007, 23:19, Reply)

My mate Eddie
is a vegetarian. I'm not overly fond of vegetarianism personally, but like most walks of life, I'll put up with it's followers as long as they don't make a ridiculous fuss about it. Unfortuantely, Ed does.

The most potent, and irritating, example of this occured one day when a group of us were sitting in a pub. While Ed was relieving himself, I finished my Doritos (Tangy Cheese) and for a bit of fun, drew a smiley face on the packet and put it over his drink.

Ed comes back and, as I expected, tuts and pulls the packet off his glass. However he then, not as I expected, refused to even touch his drink.

"Why not?"
"Those crisps aren't vegetarian."
"So? The packet was empty."
"But there'll have been some crumbs still in there that fell in my drink."
"Ed, I emptied the packet, shook it out and everything."
"No, there would still have been some left."
"Let me get this straight; You're refusing to have any more of that drink, because some miniscule bits of crisp essence might have fallen into it?"
"Yes."
"You pathetic bastard. I'll have your damn drink then."

Still annoys me even remembering it. Fair enough if there'd been a massive lump of Dorito floating in his glass, but if he hadn't seen the packet over the top he'd have happily drunk it down and not even noticed. Git.

As for me, I don't eat fish or seafood, mostly due to a semi-phobia of fish and sea creatures. My grandparents still constantly try and get me to eat fish, using the old 'How do you know you don't like if you've never tried it?' routine. They once took me to a sushi restaurant, I swear deliberately to taunt me.
(Uncle Comrade, Thu 1 Mar 2007, 23:04, Reply)

I have the misfortune of cooking...
... for psausage76.

He does not eat any vegetables. Or fruit. I made burgers the other night, with finely chopped onion. He picked the onion bits out. How he found them among the rest of the burger, I have no idea.

He also does not eat cheese, unless it is melted and mixed in with things so he doesn't know it's there.

He eats chicken though. Lots of chicken. And potatoes.

And creme eggs too.
(mazzmatazz is messing it up like a blue bottle, Thu 1 Mar 2007, 23:04, Reply)

Fussy aye?
Here's what i dont eat-

Meat: Steak, Poultry, Venison + All Game, Lamb, Mutton, 'Ribs', Fish (or any seafood).

Vegetables: Most apart from certain common vegetables used in pasta sauces (Tomato etc) but only edible if Liquidised... Potato (but only in chip form)

Fruit - Love fruit juice. Cant actually eat the fruit... Squeeze the juice from it and i will drink it there and then but i can't bring myself to bite/chew/masticate + swallow actual fruit. Same goes with chunks of veg...

I basically live on pasta, cheese + tomato based sauces. Cheese pizza. I can eat sausage and burger meat but "no too thick". I like Quorn products a lot. Occasionally manage Lasagne, not often though. There are other thngs but basically.

My diet is fucking poor.

(but I will scran your Crisps and Chocolate!!!)

G
( Bongmaster Is a Junglist Soldier., Thu 1 Mar 2007, 22:57, Reply)

Orange
I can't eat anything orange.

Not only the flavour, the colour too

..I can eat chocolate oranges though, they're lovely
(ZAMIVEL!, Thu 1 Mar 2007, 22:56, Reply)

Veggies
I simply wont allow any vegetables in my house, not since the time I caught Stephen Hawkings going through my diary.
(Fatima Whitbread's hardon drugs and the causes of drugs, Thu 1 Mar 2007, 22:50, Reply)

I will...
eat almost anything. I have a stomach of steel when it comes to food, I'll admit that. Prawn and mustard sandwiches, mayonnaise, tomato sauce and pickled onion sandwiches etc...the list goes on (mostly sandwich based though). I also eat eggs even after my boyfriend affectionately nicked named them 'Chicken's Periods'...

However...I HATE HATE HATE ham sandwiches. Actually, I hate ham. Period. Particularly that jelly-like substance that appears on particular type of ham...ewww (i'm retching just thinking about it)...and the fatty stuff around the edge (not abnormal, but just disgusting). When I was a bit younger (about 12 years younger) my mum used to make me ham sandwiches for lunch, but instead of eating them like a good kiddie I used to remove the ham from the sandwich and drop in behind the bench I sat on in the dining hall (the bench was against a wall). A while later (as in weeks) the cleaning staff found a rather substantial pile of ham festering....and my mother was instructed not to give me ham sandwiches again.

Now when I go to school I eat all of my sandwiches.... :P
( its_hatorah_bitch is b3ta the devil you know on, Thu 1 Mar 2007, 22:48, Reply)

Hunger Strike
After seeing an episode of the Simpsons I refused to eat food until my parents bought me a nacho hat like one Homer had in the episode. After a couple of days of not eating I got my way when my father came home from work and presented me with one.

He had made it himself. Ok, it was made out of Doritos and I had to eat around the superglue but other than that it tasted alright.
(Fatima Whitbread's hardon drugs and the causes of drugs, Thu 1 Mar 2007, 22:45, Reply)

Tea
I love tea. Thrive on it. But it has to be a nice strong brew (though not tannic), have a drop of milk in AFTER it's been poured. Too much milk makes me retch. No milk I find insipid.

Fussy? Nah.
(Neddy Nedson is nice really, Thu 1 Mar 2007, 22:43, Reply)

Picky Eaters?
Ha! Don't any of you have kids?

(Length? Kept it short.)
(DanS like you've never DanSed before!, Thu 1 Mar 2007, 22:37, Reply)