Man, this place used to be cool.

( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:23, archived)

Mono's bumhole

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:24, archived)

what percentage, do you think, of mr horrible's posts contain "Mono's bumhole" or words to that effect?

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:25, archived)

Jew%

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:26, archived)

about 5%
and that's a generous estimate.
( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:27, archived)

NotNearlyEnough%

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:28, archived)

I'm organising a full size bouncy replica of MONO!s bumhole for the school fayre at the weekend.

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:27, archived)

YES!

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:27, archived)

Is it made out of a stack of tractor tyres,
painted pink with brown detailing?
( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:33, archived)

and it's the size of a bus.

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:36, archived)

coooooooooooooooooooool for caaaaaaaaaaaats

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:24, archived)

No it didn't.
It used to be full of LARPers and Red Dwarf quoters pretending to think each other were cool because it was the nearest thing they could find to friends.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:26, archived)

As a player of traditional pen and paper RPGs I laugh at LARPers

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:27, archived)

This is the wittiest thing you will ever write.
Who did you copy it from?
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:28, archived)

I didn't cheat

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:33, archived)

Haha...brilliant as usual Mono

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:28, archived)

I have a big box of dice.

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:32, archived)

I found a 20 sided dice in my house recently
I'm not sure where it came from
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:34, archived)

can I have it?
I love collecting dice :D
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:34, archived)

Sure, if I can find it again I'll give you a shout

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:38, archived)

Fanx

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:45, archived)

I bought these the other week
www.thinkgeek.com/geektoys/plush/7ccc/
( fatpoof, Wed 23 May 2012, 17:18, archived)

Now that's geeky.
I almost want them!
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 17:23, archived)

I bet you stubbled across them whilst searching for "fuzzy danglers"

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 17:24, archived)

Smeg off, you smegging smeghead.

( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:28, archived)

I love doing star trek PBEMs!!!

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:28, archived)

I don't want to know what a PBEM is.
But I do miss CYOA Books.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:30, archived)

Oh yeah
They were massive when I was a kid. The ones where it was like "to go left, go to page 28", that sort of thing?
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:31, archived)

I look for them when I'm in bookshops but can't ever find them

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:33, archived)

You're doing it wrong.
I used to have all of them, I think a friend of mine still has them all. but he's old enough to have bought them all new, I'm not that old.
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:34, archived)

can you ask him if I can borrow one?

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:37, archived)

He wouldn't let you.
They're probably worth a bit to him.
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:46, archived)

can I borrow one of yours?

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:50, archived)

Don't have them anymore

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:53, archived)

:(

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:54, archived)

Steve Jackson and Ian Livingstone?

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:33, archived)

Yes, I think so
We're talking 20 odd years ago mind.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:37, archived)

Sometimes they wrote them individually.

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:53, archived)

Steve Jackson started up Steve Jackson Games
Which does the AWETASTIC Munchkin game, which is awesomely fantastic.
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:54, archived)

Christ those were shit.
We must be about the same age.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:38, archived)

I'm 21*
*35
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:39, archived)

OMG you could be my older brother!

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:41, archived)

SLIGHTLY older brother, I think you mean

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:42, archived)

I'm only 25!

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:43, archived)

32
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:46, archived)

You could be my slightly younger brother!

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:51, archived)

*steals your comics*
*gets chocolate on them*
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:52, archived)

'chocolate'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:53, archived)

says a smelly tramp!

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:54, archived)

I'm going to a smelly tramp convention tonight

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:57, archived)

wow! a chance for a bit of networking.

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:58, archived)

I know!
We'll be swapping box-house tips, along with what's 'NOW' in the aroma scene.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:59, archived)

you might find some new places to source fagends
or half drunk cans of strong lager.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 17:01, archived)

What's new in toeless boots?
The very latest in knotted hankies on sticks technology!
How to turn your 10p for a cup of tea into £££'s!
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 17:00, archived)

Meet other like-minded vagrants for chat
or maybe more!
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 May 2012, 17:01, archived)

And later in the day
Homeless Hilarity with 'Harry The Happy Hobo'

And for the adults, Harry's Blue Hour starts at 11:00!
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 17:03, archived)

steal a dog and double your begging earnings!

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 17:03, archived)

FUCK SAKE
MUM....THAT LITTLE SHIT HAS BEEN PLAYING WITH MY DURAN DURAN RECORDS!!!!
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:53, archived)

'HE'S BENT THE COVER OF MY BAUHAUS SINGLE'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:55, archived)

MUUUUUM!!!! THAT'S NOT TRUE!!!
OWWWWW SMELLY HATS GAVE ME A NURPLE!!!!
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:56, archived)

*chinese burns*
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:57, archived)

*kicks shin*
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:59, archived)

*dead legs*
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 17:01, archived)

*spits*
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 17:02, archived)

Smell the cheese.
SMELL IT.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:59, archived)

Hahaha
Also: Open the gate...
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 17:01, archived)

A bullying classic.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 May 2012, 17:06, archived)

38 - YESSSSSSSS

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:52, archived)

Lotto!

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:54, archived)

It didn't though, did it?

( magnum, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:26, archived)

No, not really.

( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:27, archived)

Don't lie to me again please.

( magnum, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:32, archived)

It was just wishful thinking. :(

( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:33, archived)

when was that?

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:28, archived)

It went downhill
around the time this happened.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:31, archived)

It went downhill when it was linked to from the front page.
You have repeatedly said so yourself.
( Lord Gnome, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:32, archived)

A couple of weeks before you joined
When baldmonkey was on holiday and Fenris ruled the roost.
( Lord Gnome, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:31, archived)

                     
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:32, archived)

Oh man, Fenris was awesome.
Most of the good people have fucked off. Where's a Benny when you need one these days?
( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:34, archived)

Tied to a tree I expect.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:39, archived)

one's on the loose

( mongychops, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:45, archived)

good times

( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:56, archived)

they tried to rape me, took advantage of my drunk state and pathetic moral compass

( mongychops, Wed 23 May 2012, 17:00, archived)

That and your loose shit-pipe too.

( Lord Gnome, Wed 23 May 2012, 17:02, archived)

yeah
then you got here
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:30, archived)

Says Mr. Nooby Noob-face.

( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:37, archived)

*struts around*
Now no doubt someone with an earlier account will trump me.
(badger of doom http://www.trendingtracks.co.uk, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:40, archived)

Oh MAN so close.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:58, archived)

*continues strutting*
 
(badger of doom http://www.trendingtracks.co.uk, Wed 23 May 2012, 17:02, archived)

Christ, a badger-based username.
Old skool, man. I remember the rules: badgers and monkeys for boy b3tans, kittinz for girl ones.
( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Wed 23 May 2012, 17:02, archived)

quentin sounds a bit like kitten

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 17:04, archived)

The 'cool years'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 May 2012, 17:09, archived)

your mum

( mongychops, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:44, archived)

I'm cool, I'm cool, I have a jacket that folds up into a bumbag!

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:48, archived)

*dies of second-hand cool exposure*

( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Wed 23 May 2012, 17:04, archived)

I have a bum bag that folds up into my bum!
and oh god help me
( fatpoof, Wed 23 May 2012, 17:20, archived)

that one with the fanny off of qotw has apparently put me on ignore.
28, motherfuckers!!
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 17:05, archived)

i suspect i have been ignored by a few other forum users

( mongychops, Wed 23 May 2012, 17:22, archived)

bored of that now.
someone make up a real life dilemma we can debate about.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:02, archived)

i've only got pasta for tea, and i can't be bothered to go to the shop

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:03, archived)

smash it up into little bits and pretend it's rice.

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:04, archived)

don't wanna

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:05, archived)

FINE.

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:06, archived)

did i mention i've got 2 star destroyers?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:07, archived)

That's pretty cool.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:08, archived)

i keep recreating the opening scene from star wars
by moving it over my head and humming the imperial march
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:15, archived)

by the way;
i'm NOT upset
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:17, archived)

cool

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:18, archived)

can I come over t see them?
mum says it's okay.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:09, archived)

yeah cool
bring your darth vader and obi wan, we can do space battles
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:16, archived)

yes!!!!

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:25, archived)

Glue all the bits together to make a robot who can go buy you fish and chips or something.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:06, archived)

thinking outside the box
i like your style
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:07, archived)

smash it up into little bits and pretend it's Tim Rice

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:07, archived)

NO!

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:16, archived)

Oh please
I'm envious of the fact that he's not a terribly good lyricist, yet he's a mulit-millionaire and I am not.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:20, archived)

I'm in love with my next door neighbour but she's only 68!
what should I do?
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:03, archived)

Her dog.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:06, archived)

she doesn't have one.
you're no help at all!
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:06, archived)

Smash her face in, stamp on her chest until some ribs protrude, rip the ribs out and fuck her straight in the lung.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:13, archived)

Haha, oh man

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:14, archived)

The prick'll probably start bitching about her not having lungs next.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:19, archived)

Hey, never know
She might have one of those tracheotomy holes. That's got to be worth trying, right? I mean...COME OOOOONNN!!
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:21, archived)

My gran had one of those.
I put a pea in it once for a laugh.
My brother was all like "she might choke".
I was all "nah it'll be funny".
It was funny. It make loads of farty noises.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:24, archived)

Shit

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:33, archived)

that's your answer to everything.

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:26, archived)

I have this lump on your balls, what should I do?

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:05, archived)

Send cash.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:06, archived)

I'm in love with an east german man
The problem is he's a compulsive thief.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:06, archived)

WELL FINE.
IF NO ONE WANTS TO HAVE A DECENT CONVERSATION, I'M GOING TO MY ROOM TO SULK.
I'm not upset though.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:07, archived)

i misread that as SILK

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:07, archived)

I misread that as SILT

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:08, archived)

I misread that as BALLBAG

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:10, archived)

LOOK
I came to you with a fucking serious problem, but if you don't want to help, then fine.
I am NOT upset.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:09, archived)

FUCK HIS EYES.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:10, archived)

And this will stop him from stealing?

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:13, archived)

sure

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:14, archived)

he's Alvazs Schtealing!!!

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:10, archived)

Er zahlt nie für irgendetwas!

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:13, archived)

I'm actually really upset that someone called me a 'shit-for-brains troll'
ME!!!!
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:24, archived)

Pull yourself the fuck together

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:27, archived)

MODS!!!

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:27, archived)

manolith! make the horrible boys stop doing blank posts with mouseovers!
plus, make them revere me as i deserve.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:01, archived)

Spose we might as well make use of this thread.
www.amazon.co.uk/Late-for-the-Sky-4099554/dp/B00000JMNM/ref=sr_1_298?s=kids&ie=UTF8&qid=1337777799&sr=1-298
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:02, archived)

        
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:06, archived)

look, mono!
we've grown apart recently. i feel like you're...distant from me. i know i've let things slide, and the house is a mess. but i can change, baby. i CAN. for us. can we...try again?
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:26, archived)

       
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:27, archived)

um, fuck you?

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:30, archived)

Oh shit, can you read the blank ones now?

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:31, archived)

shush, i'm reading about a terrible plane crash.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:40, archived)

are there any good ones?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:59, archived)

I had one with some raspberry sauce and a flake stuck in it, that was pretty good

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:08, archived)

oh no, I mean icecream,

I want an icecream
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:09, archived)

you could crash a rocket lolly
and call it 'columbia'
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:14, archived)

How rude.

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:42, archived)

        
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:30, archived)

hahahahaha

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:41, archived)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=C31ZGmfkXxo
( Lord Gnome, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:03, archived)

                   
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:08, archived)

Can you help poor wee Battered on /OT please?
He needs a new user name because his wife's found his out.

Thanks
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:15, archived)

I passed a couple on in the Emvee flounce.

(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:47, archived)

b3ta.com/questions/sextoys/post1623457
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:58, archived)

man! i wish i weren't banned from qotw. all this signing in and out is a nightmare.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:04, archived)

Can't you use the mirror?

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:05, archived)

Yeah. I'm not a fucking vampire.
Good point actually. What's the ip again?
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:06, archived)

207.44.242.20/talk/
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:07, archived)

it keeps logging me out
fuck that
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:14, archived)

Never mind
I think the game's finished now anyway. I dare say he's put me on ignore now too.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:18, archived)

Oh, apparently not
He needs to chill out. Oh well.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:25, archived)

That's like the first time I've really read much over on QOTW and I'm confused, are they all just massive blobby spastics?

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:33, archived)

No, I don't think so
That's the first time I've seen someone really flouncey over there personally...there are loads of unpleasant people though.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:35, archived)

I'll be honest.
I think they're more shit than me.
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:41, archived)

No. Don't put yourself down, MONO.
NO ONE is more shit than you.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:56, archived)

open 2 different inprivate browser windows and log in with both accounts
its how i run all of the accounts on QOTW
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:06, archived)

I could. But it's all too much effort.
Just let me know if I get a bite off flouncey bum.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:27, archived)

he's got you on ignore, how's that going to happen?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:34, archived)

TADA!
I'm so good I can get a flounce from BEYOND the IGNORE.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:55, archived)

Cheers for the help btw.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:58, archived)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=gzeNj1vlzAk&skipcontrinter=1

I miss Mykey
( Lord Gnome, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:06, archived)

HEY! YOU! LOLD NOMAY! YOU FUCKIN EGRET OKAY! I TELL TO YOU THAT YOU AWL OVER FUCKIN EGRET.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:07, archived)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=mhcv_OvUR2s
( Lord Gnome, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:39, archived)

        
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:04, archived)

Ah well

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:06, archived)

               
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:07, archived)

        
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:08, archived)

chairman maolith is above helping the little people

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:11, archived)

Man, that Emvee fella's getting all sorts of upset over on /ot

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:13, archived)

                                                                                        cool
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:14, archived)

tell him transformers are shit, the comics especially

( mongychops, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:15, archived)

that upset him

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:31, archived)

how strange

( mongychops, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:33, archived)

is he on ot now?
i thought he was on qotw
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:18, archived)

I've never seen him on /OT

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:18, archived)

TH is being wrong again
bloody two hats, its no wonder we all prefer baldmonkey
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:21, archived)

*glares*

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:26, archived)

(pinches in the mouth)

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:28, archived)

Oh yes, my mistake
He's everso angry, isn't he?
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:19, archived)

YOU SHUT UP YOU WEREN'T EVEN THERE, MAN.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:20, archived)

How would you like a pinch in the mouth?

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:23, archived)

i assume it must be down to him having to pimp out his widowed mother to pay for all his superhero belt buckles

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:22, archived)

hey janet
does it annoy you that my answer on QOTW got more replies than this thread? it would probably annoy me

but i know you're better than that
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:04, archived)

i'd be embarrassed for sure

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:28, archived)

Jeepers!

(Kid Presentable, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:08, archived)

Copy paste
Akabusi sat in his Vauxhall Corsa as it passed through the car wash humming the theme tune from Record Breakers. All the windows were soaped up and no one could see in so, for the briefest moments, he thought about having a wank. But his two kids were in the back so he decided against it.

After dropping them off at school, Akabusi was at a loss as to how to fill his day. He was delivering a motivational speech to a bunch of spastics tonight in Stevenage so he didn't want to over do it. He felt a twinge in his back. It had been aching since him and John Fashanu had wrestled naked in front of a roaring fire at Fash's £128,700 mansion in Hemel Hempstead. Akabusi had smashed a porcelain bust of Justin and he had had to leave.

Before he knew it he was at a massage parlour and had paid his £10 entry. Before he could get to the changing rooms he slipped out of his pin stripe dungerees and could feel the fragrant steam of the sauna tickle his massive balls like a poacher under a trout.

He applied a towel to his lower torso, barely able to conceal his pulsating ebony fire hydrant. He stepped into the room and lay down on the pleather massage table pushing his face through the hole and letting his cock hang over the side.

Behind him the door opened and Akabusi's pussy senses were raised to Severe. The aroma of chicken and sweetcorn soup and Morecambe Bay cockles hit him like a steam train and he knew right then that he would sire another child.

Small hands covered in oil began to explore his muscular, Nigerian coffee coloured bodywork. As the girl's hands reached his proud buttocks he tried everything in his power to conceal a huge fart he had been brewing since he'd parked in the multi storey car park.

When the girl slipped a greasy little finger up his April he let out a yelp and nearly roared "Awooga" but he stopped himself. The hands of the girl motioned him to turn over, which he duly did.

His eyes found a young Chinese girl wearing a little white tunic which he knew concealed a pair of juicy little bristols and almost certainly a clunge as ripe and yellow as a week old banana. As he lay on his back, blood rushed into his veiny Tower of Pisa quicker than Asians into a Cash And Carry at 8.59am. He lay there looking like a chocolate drawing pin as the girl starting applying more and more oil. He was so hard and tall that he worried slightly that the price of oil may be affected by his erection.

Her tiny hands kneeded his giant oak and at one point Akabusi half thought she was an Ewok trying to climb a Giant Red on Endor. He leapt up and ripped open her tunic revealing, as he had suspected, a gorgeous set of two tits, nipples as dark as Green and Black 70% and a pussy so wet and hairless he was reminded of Duncan Goodhew.

He dived into her like a released rapist and set about plunging into every orifice that was available and some that were not. Within hours he was on his vinegars and let rip with such a gush of spunk that the poor girl tried in vein to make a call to the Morecambe Bay coastguard.

Spent, sweating and panting Akabusi untangled his yawning plonker and slipped on his dungerees. The girl, who later from police reports he found was called Hi Tide Run, lay on the floor, a shredded mess of manfat, baby oil, matted hair and rice. Akabusi looked at his Casio watch/calculator and saw that the spastic thing started in 20 minutes. He bent down over the Chinese meal he had just demolished, whisphered "Awooga" in her ear and patted her on the fanny.
( Zuowan, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:18, archived)

Oh man, it's been ages since I've seen some decent Kriss Akabusi fan fiction

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:20, archived)

                                                 
( broadsword w⚓, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:40, archived)

you're asking manilith for help?
fucking hell.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:53, archived)

        
        
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:38, archived)

         
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:39, archived)

        
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:40, archived)

         
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:42, archived)

          
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:55, archived)

        
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:55, archived)

          
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:56, archived)

        
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:58, archived)

        
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:59, archived)

Tell me something interesting about baldmonkey

(. Y . ), Wed 23 May 2012, 14:02, archived)

        
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:02, archived)

               
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:05, archived)

        
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:09, archived)

to all the posters i've ignored before
who've travelled in and out my door
i'm glad you buggered off
my cap to you i doff
to all the posters i've ignored before

all you whiny self-entitled shits
bellends, dullards and obnoxious tits
you need to go outside
and salvage you some pride
all the posters i've ignored before
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:41, archived)

        
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:43, archived)

if there's a shred of humanity left in that dessicated shell you call your psyche,
you'll delete that thread up there so the world can appreciate the majesty of my julio igleasias pastiche.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:46, archived)

            
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:50, archived)

    
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:51, archived)

        
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:57, archived)

           
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:58, archived)

        
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:59, archived)

       
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:03, archived)

        
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 14:05, archived)

my phone wont show any off this so i suppose i might as well do some work, you fat ballbag

( mongychops, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:51, archived)

         
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:53, archived)

old thread is unwieldy.
ergo, new thread. who is your least favourite b3tan? personally i can't BEAR mono!
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:39, archived)

rob
he's a cunt
( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:40, archived)

controversial...

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:49, archived)

not really
it's well known
( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:50, archived)

I like everyone
Even the people ignoring me
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:40, archived)

I'm ignoring you

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:41, archived)

I think I like you the most

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:41, archived)

I'm only ignoring you because you're popular
and I'm ignoring you with another account. Not this one.
( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:43, archived)

You just blew my mind

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:43, archived)

do you take the red pill or the blue pill?

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:47, archived)

The first thing you have to realise
is that there is no pill.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:48, archived)

wear a fucking condom then

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:49, archived)

I've never found a colour I like

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:50, archived)

BROWN.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:51, archived)

RACIST!

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:51, archived)

Cor
Or what about beige? OOH! In suede!
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:52, archived)

RACIST!

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:51, archived)

      
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:46, archived)

Vaya con DIOS?
Well that's rude
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:47, archived)

this is like baldmonkey is sooty
only unlike the real sooty, everything he says isn't littered with expletives
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:50, archived)

        
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:54, archived)

Where are we going?

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:49, archived)

        
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:53, archived)

:'(
lunch time
toys r us time
bye time
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:56, archived)

can't be bothered to go to toys r us so I'm back already.
miss me?
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:09, archived)

There used to be a few I didn't like but they've mostly facked orf

( broadsword w⚓, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:42, archived)

alright treacle?

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:42, archived)

Hi honeybun

( broadsword w⚓, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:44, archived)

i hate bear mono too, i much prefer human mono

( Lightguy hail satan, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:42, archived)

bear mono's bumhole is nowhere near as good as human mono's bumhole

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:43, archived)

BEAR BUMHOLE.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:46, archived)

hickory smoked bear bumholes

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:49, archived)

stop making me hungry.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:50, archived)

PIG COCK

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:52, archived)

COR!

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:53, archived)

+ curly fries

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:55, archived)

fries penis
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:57, archived)

PENIS GOURD
/ac
( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:58, archived)

I don't have any favourites, soz

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:43, archived)

      
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:44, archived)

APART FROM BALDMONKEY !!!!!!

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:54, archived)

        
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:57, archived)

      
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:43, archived)

that bloody baldmonkey

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:45, archived)

      
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:45, archived)

dammit baldmonkey1

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:46, archived)

      
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:46, archived)

you're alright, you are
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:48, archived)

please transcribe them.
no mouseovers on an ipad :(

[/hipster]
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:51, archived)

        
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:52, archived)

cunty mcCunt.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:54, archived)

                                                                                                                   
( broadsword w⚓, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:12, archived)

        
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:51, archived)

     
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:29, archived)

        
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:31, archived)

          
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:37, archived)

aHA!!
mystery solved. although your quentin account is funnier. soz.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:47, archived)

he's posted in this thread so we can stop the whole 'he can't see this stuff, yeah?

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:52, archived)

ooooooOOOOOOOOooohh.
got your period?
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:55, archived)

no. that's just rectal bleeding

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:56, archived)

it's hot and i want to go outside

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:57, archived)

It is
I fucking hate it. You know that SAD that people get? I get it in the summer. So I warn you...I'm going to be a miserable prick until about October.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:59, archived)

I think we should have a baton handover thing, like relay runners
as that's when I become a miserable prick.
( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:00, archived)

Then we can have a constant state of misery

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:02, archived)

we'd practically be [insert b3tan name here]

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:04, archived)

bluestar

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:11, archived)

        
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:32, archived)

         
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:38, archived)

.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:57, archived)

        
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:58, archived)

                                           
( broadsword w⚓, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:22, archived)

        
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:29, archived)

mongychops
when he talks he sounds like KAAAAKKAAAKKAAAAAAARK KAKAKAKAKAKAKAAAARRRKAKARRRK and he pretty much is just a terrible troll and should be banned
(Cabbages. Knickers. It's not got a beak, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:01, archived)

I'm gazzing the mods
terrible bullying
( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:03, archived)

EVERYONE PUT MONGYCHOPS ON IGNORE NOW UNTIL HE GOES AWAY

(Cabbages. Knickers. It's not got a beak, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:07, archived)

my name is jacob dyer and i live in bristol. it is fantastic. i sound like barnaby bear. i like barnaby bear. one time he went to france. i went to france. but some kid burnt my neck. i didnt like it.

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:08, archived)

whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaattttrt¿

( mongychops, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:10, archived)

that fat tart jessie, i'm glad she got banned

( mongychops, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:04, archived)

see? see what I mean?

(Cabbages. Knickers. It's not got a beak, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:05, archived)

I think we need a food thread Frank

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:07, archived)

can't be arsed, imma take a shit then go outside for a bit

(Cabbages. Knickers. It's not got a beak, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:08, archived)

OUTSIDE???

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:09, archived)

what is this 'outside' of which he speaks?
is it swansea?
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:28, archived)

     
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:38, archived)

good, i hope you never get it back
/edit: who's they anyway?
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:39, archived)

      
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:42, archived)

Haha
classic
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:39, archived)

      
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:42, archived)

Jesus, I had no idea
Fuck...I'm really sorry. Can I do anything to help? Just let me know, yeah?
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:43, archived)

      
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:45, archived)

Ok, no problem

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:46, archived)

      
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:47, archived)

pfft, he IS isn't he!
this line left intentionally blank
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:44, archived)

Not cool Manolith, not cool

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:46, archived)

:(
what's the matter?
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:47, archived)

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:48, archived)

      
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:51, archived)

        
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:55, archived)

You pricks

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 13:01, archived)

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:40, archived)

Best thread ever.

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:40, archived)

It's right up there with Mono's "You?" threads

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:41, archived)

I'd say it was better, but then I'm biased

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:44, archived)

No, the "You?" threads have more subtance long term
but this is VERY punchy.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:47, archived)

bored of that now
I really fucking hate donkeys, I'd like to run one over with a Chieftain tank, fucking useless shit stupid stinking half-horsey shit animals, fuck off donkeys, who's your favourite mass murderer?

alt: pricks

pricks
(Cabbages. Knickers. It's not got a beak, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:33, archived)

Why specifically a chieftain?

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:34, archived)

he finds all other tanks too challengering

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:35, archived)

I heard he sherman for tank puns.

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:36, archived)

he's such a pan-zer-sy

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:37, archived)

IS-2 he?

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:38, archived)

yeah he's a delicate little flower
like a Tiger-lily
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:39, archived)

I heard he was as bald as Churchill.

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:41, archived)

Panzer round his ankles

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:40, archived)

because your mum's knickers
that's why
(Cabbages. Knickers. It's not got a beak, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:36, archived)

Cool, thanks.
Fancy the pub later?
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:36, archived)

not with you
cunt
(Cabbages. Knickers. It's not got a beak, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:37, archived)

I just wondered, you know.

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:38, archived)

jeffrey dahmer.
thanks for asking.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:34, archived)

Fred West

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 May 2012, 11:34, archived)

www.b3ta.com/talk/7504793
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:35, archived)

www.b3ta.com/talk/7504802
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 May 2012, 11:35, archived)

www.b3ta.com/talk/7504830
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:42, archived)

what the?
why would anyone ignore windy pig?
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:36, archived)

never mind that, why would 27 people ignore ME?

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:36, archived)

because it's a made-up illness by lazy people

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:37, archived)

i have called fat people fat on QOTW
and they don't seem to like it very much.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 May 2012, 11:37, archived)

they're supposed to be jolly, what gives?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:38, archived)

who knows quentin,
who knows.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 May 2012, 11:39, archived)

they don't seem to like anything very much.
especially that one with the fanny.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:38, archived)

My god
She is spiteful and has no sense of humour. Two endearing qualities that I for one look for in a woman.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:45, archived)

Two people are ignoring me!
ME!!!
I didn't think I was interesting enough to be ignored.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:44, archived)

Aww bless

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:52, archived)

FUCK OFF

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:01, archived)

I don't even know how many people are ignoring me...

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:46, archived)

i do
it's somewhere between two hats and baldmonkey's totals
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:49, archived)

is anyone ignoring me?
can you message them and ask why? thanks
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:50, archived)

i only know the number, not who they are
and yes. 12.
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:51, archived)

oh, do me, do me!

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:53, archived)

bloody hell, your number is lower than i expected

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:01, archived)

Go on then.

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:03, archived)

sorry. too busy now. bye!

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:04, archived)

You're such a useless wanker.

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:05, archived)

I think the people that dislike me are the kind of people that want to keep telling me they don't like me and like to bitch and moan about it rather than just ignore me whether using a button or actually just ignoring me.

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:04, archived)

One of my favourite things to read here is
"Put me on ignore then" or similar. Always makes me chuckle.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:07, archived)

physically ignoring someone is an idea lost on most of /talk

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:08, archived)

Yes
I guess it's the temptation of trying to get the last word in, or (even worse) trying to make the other person look foolish. Which never ends well.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:12, archived)

I think mostly, people don't want to miss something good, or more likely don't want to miss them saying something about them that they can't see.
people need to sort their lives out I reckon.
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:12, archived)

YEAH
You tell 'em Mono
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:14, archived)

So they only ignore you if they like you?

(. Y . ), Wed 23 May 2012, 12:09, archived)

Something like that.
I told the guys I liked at work that I generally just ignore people if I don't like them and the guys that I ignore suddenly twigged.
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:10, archived)

Bet I'm zero, I'm well liked and loved by all

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:04, archived)

49. still a long way short of bm though

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:16, archived)

me please, thanks.

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:17, archived)

sorry. terribly busy.

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:22, archived)

TH is going to kick you in the shin now, thanks.

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:22, archived)

haha, no he isn't

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:27, archived)

Please tell me :(
I feel well left out :'(
mod bullying
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:29, archived)

it's one of these numbers:
1, 7, 11, 19, 24, 43
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:32, archived)

I'm putting you on ignore now
k thanks bye!
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:33, archived)

alright! level with two hats!

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:34, archived)

tell me tell me tell me tell me tell me

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:35, archived)

i did!

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:39, archived)

Ooh, I'm going to give that shin such a kicking
With my good shoes an'all
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:30, archived)

my manly shin will destroy your ridiculous hush puppies or whatever it is you wear

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:33, archived)

THEY'RE CB'S AND I GOT THEM FROM INTERNATIONAL FOOTWEAR

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:34, archived)

fluffy mules.
guaranteed.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:34, archived)

i bet he's the sort of cunt that wears brightly coloured crocs

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:35, archived)

You monster

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:36, archived)

oh god i saw one of my male friends in tesco this morning and he had crocs on :(

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:38, archived)

A male friend of mine was wearing a pair once
I didn't know where to look
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:39, archived)

Haha
Is it in three figures?
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:18, archived)

He won't tell me mine.
Can you kick him in the shin next time you see him please, thanks.
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:19, archived)

I'll need a step ladder, but yes

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:22, archived)

jizz

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:23, archived)

I might try to bug him lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots
can't be that hard to write a bot to keep gazzing him.
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:28, archived)

harassment
banned
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:33, archived)

BANNED ON THE RUUUUUUUUUUN

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:35, archived)

no, he's a way off that yet
84
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:27, archived)

Wow
They really hate that fat prick don't they!
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:29, archived)

Years of sustained prickdom.
It's not easy, but I've practised HARD.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:33, archived)

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! FUCK YEAH!

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:30, archived)

I'm eating a sausage sandwich
What do you make of that, eh?
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:36, archived)

more than me! yay!

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:27, archived)

12?!?!! WAHT THE FUCK?????

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:53, archived)

haha, nobody likes you lol

( mongychops, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:04, archived)

what hurts most is not knowing who or why

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:04, archived)

That's like saying I've killed more people than the Pope but less than Hitler

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:50, archived)

the pope's killed loads more people than hitler

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:51, archived)

How dare you

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:51, archived)

his policy on condoms will sentences many millions to a miserable, painful death
not to mention all those prostitutes he killed to keep them queit
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:53, archived)

I like your sig
I'm not so much bothered about how many people are ignoring me, but I'm intrigued as to why.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:03, archived)

i need to know

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:05, archived)

well, you have

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:51, archived)

i just spelled your name wrong on OT
and it perfectly summed up your DRACONIAN overlaw of this place, maolith
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:59, archived)

i'm the mod /talk deserves

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:02, archived)

mod /talk deserves private dick that's a sex machine to all the chicks out there #LITH!#
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:06, archived)

you're daaaaamn right

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:15, archived)

You're engaged in speculation
I have nothing further to comment
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:01, archived)

you're stabbing a pensioner right now, aren't you?
ADMIT IT, YOU SADIST
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:03, archived)

What I do in my own home is my business

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:08, archived)

aren't you usually in the park when it happens though?

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:17, archived)

Depends
College Park is alright, but the one in Gatcombe fucks me right off. I do a lot more killing when I'm angered by the local facilities.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:18, archived)

so really it's their fault

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:24, archived)

Well yes
I find the animals and birds very soothing.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:28, archived)

tony bliar

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:35, archived)

and Nu Liebore?

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:35, archived)

and and george double-lie bush

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:39, archived)

and gordon brown
(brown as in 'brown nosing'. nose as in the part of pinochio that grows when he LIES)
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:44, archived)

David CameWRONG and Nick CLIARegg

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:46, archived)

LIAR EGG

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:48, archived)

COALIARTION GOVERMENT

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:49, archived)

Borlies Johnstlies

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:50, archived)

Ken Lievingstone

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:51, archived)

John Major-liar

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:53, archived)

why is it called a donkey punch?
they don't even have fists.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:35, archived)

because when you're riding a donkey you punch it in the back of the head so it can reach the carrot

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:36, archived)

cool! thanks Q

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:37, archived)

i don't do favourites, they are all great

( mongychops, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:57, archived)

not even when they kill prozzies and queers?

(Cabbages. Knickers. It's not got a beak, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:15, archived)

I seen this leaflet once of a donkey and these blokes has cut its ears off just for a laugh and they were posing with the upset donkey smiling and holding up its ears and I practically shat myself laughing it was VERY funny.
I mean imagine the donkey; he's all "LOL! I AM A DONKEY! I'LL BE USELESS AND MAKE A STUPID NOISE!" and then he's all "FUCK! OW! WHAT'S GOING ON! FUCK! HEY THOSE MEN HAVE MY FUCKING EARS! I'M NOT SO LOL AND THAT NOW!"
Serves him right. Fucking wop prick.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:07, archived)

I'm going to rip a crows wings off.

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:09, archived)

FUCK YEAH!
imagine the look on its face!
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:10, archived)

Probably the look of smug content.
They always do. Bastards.
(. Y . ), Wed 23 May 2012, 12:13, archived)

haha, Imma replace them with crows heads.

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:13, archived)

Are you Johnny Depp?

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:12, archived)

i saw bob mortimer pull an apple apart with his bare hands on telly last night
it was quite impressive
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:25, archived)

Someone told me about that, stupid prick didn't say it was bob mortimer though.

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:30, archived)

I mean
BULLY!
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:30, archived)

i would have assumed he'd need to twist it
but apparently that's where most people go wrong!
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:34, archived)

surely squeeze the core at the top and bottom, then pull?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:36, archived)

seems that way
can YOU do it though?
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:48, archived)

I hate those anti-animal cruelty stalls
I basically agree with them, but I don't like the massive disgusting photos when I'm trying to shop, and I will NOT be guilted into spending money on a fucking spanish donkey. I won't do it Baldmonkey, I won't.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:10, archived)

Yeah, disgusting pictures drive me away from things like that, and make me not want to go anywhere near animal rights stuff.
Even though I'm all for animals being happier.
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:12, archived)

I think all the time there is human suffering, these animal rights pricks are cunts for diverting funding that might otherwise go somewhere useful.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:32, archived)

and yet, you are one of the leading causes of human suffering

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:36, archived)

I love you too.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:37, archived)

i know
*sigh*
i know
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 12:42, archived)

does this mean that mono! can't see this thread
and will continue to post down there like a special needs?
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:32, archived)

oh man, this is all well LOL!

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:33, archived)

of course not,
he is only pretending to have you on ignore.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 May 2012, 11:34, archived)

oh he's such a TINKER.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:35, archived)

i've got everyone on ignore
talk is great
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:35, archived)

There hasn't been a thread for a while.
I just wondered, how are you?
also, what are you doing this weekend?
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:20, archived)

I'm good Mono, how's the bumhole?
This weekend I will be mostly flying RC helicopters and maybe a plane or two
( M o D, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:22, archived)

Woah, that sounds like a good weekend!
This has inspired me to have a good weekend too!
I hope you have a lovely week.
xxx
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:23, archived)

I'll be joylessly nailing mouse skeletons to balsa wood planes.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:23, archived)

Remember that one time that we found a mouse skeleton, together.
I loved that.
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:24, archived)

i get loads now.
the cats bring in dead mice so i sling them by the ants nest in the garden and the ants strip the corpse down to the skeleton in about a day. Sometimes two.
i keep them in a special box until i have enough to nail to a shoddily made balsa wood plane so i can burn it.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:29, archived)

So it's no longer "our thing" anymore then :(

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:29, archived)

never was
you just happened to be there.
soz.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:30, archived)

I thought it was some kind of special moment.

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:31, archived)

I fucking really don't want to see that

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:29, archived)

it's what you're having for tea tonight.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:30, archived)

Sometimes i am unsure inviting you to my house was a good idea.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 May 2012, 11:29, archived)

sometimes
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:30, archived)

if i'm honest, it's got a bit boring but i am worried that if i stop i'll be killing a tradition before it has had an opportunity to take hold

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:33, archived)

prick
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:35, archived)

Free flight or RC planes?

( M o D, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:24, archived)

shoddily home made.
gonna have me a mouse-plane-fire.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:27, archived)

This sounds like something I can get behind
Might strap a rabbit carcass to my heli and fly it around
( M o D, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:28, archived)

Convincing.
Yes.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:23, archived)

You're convicing?
and you're doing yes this weekend?
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:23, archived)

That is correct.
I am convincing and yes.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:26, archived)

Wonderful.

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:27, archived)

ignorelolz!!!

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:24, archived)

Que?

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:24, archived)

HHHOL!

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:27, archived)

I think I've missed something...

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:29, archived)

that's what SHE said!!
LOLOLOLOLOLOL
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:29, archived)

You really are a fat prick.
/ac
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 May 2012, 11:24, archived)

It's true!
Thanks windy, how are you?
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:24, archived)

pretty good,
you?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 May 2012, 11:25, archived)

Brilliant, thanks.

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:27, archived)

you have a great deal of hair.
just saying.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:28, archived)

you have a great deal of excess body fat.
jussayin.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 May 2012, 11:30, archived)

RUDE.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:31, archived)

I saw a picture of janet when she was young.
you know what? she wasn't a total write off.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:32, archived)

well,
that's good to know.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 May 2012, 11:33, archived)

you know what?
I've seen pictures of you as a younster and you're hotter!
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:34, archived)

incredibly, windy, you are being ignored by 6 people
i don't know who they are

as for the signed photo: here you go
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:34, archived)

i'm guessing it is all joyless wankers on QOTW

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 May 2012, 11:35, archived)

it seems likely

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:42, archived)

am I being ignored manolith?

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:36, archived)

:'(

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:43, archived)

ha, see i ignored your question about ignoring!
humour!

20 people ignoring you
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:45, archived)

Am I ignored by anyone?
I can't imagine I am.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:36, archived)

by 2 people
imagine that!
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:41, archived)

Seriously???
Fuck...who have I upset?
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:43, archived)

no idea
there is a grand total of 1 person ignoring me
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:44, archived)

How dare they

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:48, archived)

I've been invited to a bbq I can't really be arsed going to.
Might drive there and show face, mumble something about being on call.

Google's put me on a moog homage today; already listened to a 70's analogue days mix, now i've got the lovely Emperor tomato ketchup playing.
( Slippery Mick ‏, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:24, archived)

Why not just not go?
Just think, you could have a lovely weekend if you didn't do things you didn't want to do.
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:26, archived)

Because to be honest, i've got nothing better to do.
Unless you count changing the oil in my car.
( Slippery Mick ‏, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:27, archived)

Well, you might end up having a good time!

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:28, archived)

HEY MONO THIS IS A GREAT THREAD YOU FAT JOYLESS WANKER.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:25, archived)

i dont think you even care :(

( mongychops, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:26, archived)

I do!
I saw fishermen and thought of you, they were waiting to get into Trilakes
( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:28, archived)

when i saw an egret fishing i thought of mongy too

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:29, archived)

Mongy looks just like an egret.

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:32, archived)

i'm alright mono!
you?
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:26, archived)

Fantastic thanks for asking!

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:28, archived)

Fuck sake Mono, we were talking about claims to fame

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:28, archived)

he's such a mean :'(

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:29, archived)

Why do you always have to ruin everything, can't you see we're all having such a lovely time?!

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:30, archived)

but now we can all say that we've been in a MONO! thread
and that's our claim to fame
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:30, archived)

This one time I became so infatuated with the girl who played Carmen Diaz, I posted a crudely-modelled letter of the alphabet to her at the theatre where she was performing.
That was my clay M to Fame
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:38, archived)

43/M/UK
12/M/UK
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:29, archived)

great

( MONO!, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:30, archived)

so anyway, monty boyce wants us to know that he once talked to steve winwood's daughter.
i am related to the beverly sisters.

tell me a celebrity-related trufact about yourself. baldmonkey lies will be disqualified.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:13, archived)

My grandfather was Spike Milligan.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:13, archived)

I am extremely distantly related to Craig McLachlan

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:13, archived)

Ooh, my wife was briefly very distantly related to Edward Woodward. But then he divorced his way out of the family or something like that.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:15, archived)

Yeah, similar thing here actually
I was only related to him through marriage...a marriage that I'm fairly certain has ended.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:16, archived)

don't put that song in my head again please.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:15, archived)

Haha
FACEBOOKLOLS
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:16, archived)

HEEEEEEEEEEEY! MONA!
I've got the song me and caveman rich did for cr3's www.bumhol.es site stuck in my head.
I don't think bumhol.es is even live anymore.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:17, archived)

bumholes alive?
BUMHOLES ALIVE!
( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:19, archived)

Is it?
Fucked if I'm checking on a work computer.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:20, archived)

Also, I SAID:
So it was properly crow shaped, yeah?
Is it possible that it could have been a crow who's wing tips were catching the sun?
I'd suggest it was a magpie, but you said it was bigger that a crow. And you'd have to be a prick not to know a magpie when you see one.
There's no chance it was a black-backed gull, I suppose?
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:14, archived)

maybe it was the wingtips in the sun then.
it was proper massive and everything.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:15, archived)

How big would you say?
A little bit bigger than a normal crow? Mallard sized, brent goose? fucking ostrich?
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:16, archived)

bigger than a normal crow.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:18, archived)

Then I really have no fucking clue.
Soz.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:19, archived)

Maybe it was some sort of duck or something.
I dunno.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:19, archived)

A black-backed gull? In May??? Are you insane??

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:15, archived)

I've seen them in my garden you nonce.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:15, archived)

Surely you should realise by now
That I have no idea what I'm talking about
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:16, archived)

Yeah. You thought goldfinches were tropical.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:18, archived)

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:19, archived)

My grandfather used to have Stirling Moss round for lunch one Sunday every month.
One time he brought Roger Moore with him.

Also, I'm pretty sure my aunt slept with Cliff Richard.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:14, archived)

your aunt was a man?

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:15, archived)

Until her dying day she adamantly denied his homosexuality

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:16, archived)

are you sure she's an aunt?

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:16, archived)

I have stood 4ft from russ abbott in a photo

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:14, archived)

You stood 4ft from the photo?

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:15, archived)

I worked for Henry Ford II's Butler in a gun shop once
the same guy also taught maddonna to shoot.
( M o D, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:15, archived)

My step-father worked with Prince Charles on a navy ship
and once drowned Princess Anne
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:17, archived)

I like this
This embodies the true spirit of the 'Claim to Fame'. "I've met Mick Jagger" and that sort of thing are shit....THIS is what it's about.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:17, archived)

I have more!
My sister looked after David Jasons horses only he wasn't a fool he was a cranky old git
( M o D, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:19, archived)

My mum left a stern note on Dave Lee Travis' car
for driving in the entrance to Budgens car park
( M o D, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:19, archived)

I drive past Frank Bruno in his Bentley about once a month

( M o D, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:20, archived)

I met Richard Noble on a flight to Denmark

( M o D, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:20, archived)

Brilliant!

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:21, archived)

Oh I remembered one more
thanks to Mr. Tea for reminding me. Dave Prowse in the Darth suit once crushed my hand at some star wars event in milton keynes shopping centre when I was but a wee small child
( M o D, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:24, archived)

Fantastic
Well you win this for sure
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:24, archived)

richard o'brien said hello to me once.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:19, archived)

Awesome!
When me and Manolith went to London, Jill Halfpenny (used to be in Eastenders among other things) walked past us. I didn't mention it at the time.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:22, archived)

My dad knew Dave 'Darth Vader' Prowse.
They used to go to the same gym. 100% trufax.
( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:16, archived)

I once told marti pellow to go fuck himself

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:18, archived)

Well mission accomplished there!

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:19, archived)

Screw that, I once offered to nosh off Andy Miller from Dodgy.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:21, archived)

Is this true?
It could be true. But it's you saying it...hmm.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:23, archived)

I hope this "Andy Miller" spat in his face.

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:23, archived)

bravo!

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:19, archived)

when I worked as a chef, he was being a cunt to one of the staff.
prick.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:21, archived)

I once kissed Margaret Beckett
I also wish this wasn't true.
( Lord Gnome, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:18, archived)

ouch.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:20, archived)

More a peck on the cheek than tonsil tennis
But still- Margaret Beckett. I'll never be clean again.
( Lord Gnome, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:21, archived)

i saw christian o'connell a while back
he's a prick
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:19, archived)

and lucy from eastenders, she was small and she was ok

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:21, archived)

i met kris akabusi in a toy shop on christmas eve

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:20, archived)

did you shout 'AWOOOGA' at him?

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:21, archived)

no because he is kris akabusi and not john fashanu

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:47, archived)

oh wait, they both did it

( manolith hooray for me, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:48, archived)

Did he do that silly thing where he spins his arm around in the air and yells "Awooga!"?

( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:21, archived)

I once served PC Plum from Balamory when I worked in a bank.
he was with his "friend"
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:20, archived)

also, on another day, ade edmunson and john lydon.

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:22, archived)

Sat and did a crossword with Jeremy Paxman,
Ladypig is friends with Thom Yorke's wife, we have had lunch with them a few times, at one point, we had lunch with thom, his wife and Edward Norton.
Countless celebrities served in restaurants I've worked in.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 May 2012, 11:23, archived)

ruprecht!!!!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=nqMc9B7uDV8
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:26, archived)

pretty much yeah.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 May 2012, 11:28, archived)

:(

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:30, archived)

My friend worked in a photographic shop
And has served Hugh Dennis AND Patrick Moore!
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:24, archived)

holy toledo!

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:27, archived)

I've had tea with Patrick Moore AT HIS HOUSE.
So there.
( Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:59, archived)

I spilled Steve Collins pint in a crowded bar.
Trying to make my way through the crowd I walked straight into him and knocked his drink out of his hand. That was a serious "Oh Fuck!" moment.
( Lord Gnome, Wed 23 May 2012, 11:31, archived)

Thread is too long,
Tell me some of the old racist/offensive jokes that used to get bandied around the playground that if you told at the pub these days might end in a thump in the side of the head. And don't just go on sickipedia and start posting any old tripe, don't give Rob that sort of traffic.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 May 2012, 10:43, archived)

What's the difference between a Jew and a Pizza?
Pizza's don't scream when you put them in the oven
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 10:46, archived)

Seriously....my Mum told me that joke when I was a kid
I didn't get it, of course. But I'm certain my teacher did when I told her.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 10:46, archived)

factually correct,
might raise a snigger. 5 points.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 May 2012, 10:47, archived)

YES

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 23 May 2012, 10:48, archived)

oof,

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 May 2012, 10:46, archived)

'come out you black bastard'
'only for a chocolate biscuit'
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 10:46, archived)

what is this?
this is not a joke.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 May 2012, 10:47, archived)

thats the punchline.
i can't even remember the setup. and where is THEOBAN anyway? i miss theoban.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 10:47, archived)

apparently he's busy.
i reckon maybe he's got a new boyfriend, you know how Theo likes to play the gimp, probably in a box all leathered up.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 23 May 2012, 10:49, archived)

brb.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 23 May 2012, 10:49, archived)

When we were watching crackerjack, and they did that game where they'd keep giving the kids something until they dropped them all or some shit
if there was a coloured kid on there my dad used to shout at the telly "GIVE THE WOG A CABBAGE!".
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 23 May 2012, 10:50, archived)