b3ta.com board

Home » Messageboard » Archive 3012 (Older | Newer)

u can always trust...

a dog in a beret, smoking a pipe

(

spassmonkey, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:04, archived)

Hahahaha...

Nothing worse than a dog that lies...

(jubhosking, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:07, archived)

at last

a voice of reason! ;)

(

rogan, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:07, archived)

He's right you know.

And he looks so dapper too!

(

bigdave, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:08, archived)

woo!

for the smoking doggie.

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:11, archived)

bandwagon? moi?

(

Slim has found god. He was down the back of the sofa., Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:04, archived)

i like that

i know i shouldn't what with the crowther thing beng over, etc, etc, but i can't help liking this picture very very much. nicely done.

(

mikeisbrill, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:13, archived)

Nothing wrong with liking it.
It isn't as if it is bad taste.

(

Slim has found god. He was down the back of the sofa., Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:18, archived)

Short on time and hummus this week...

Don't know why it went S2V - it's a fascinating insight into obsession with inanimate railway construction materials...

(

snooze, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:04, archived)

that is so barrel-scraping that it is fantastic.

(

mikeisbrill, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:15, archived)

more hummus required

On my part I feel for this compo. entry...

(

Razor What the fuck - a sig?, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:02, archived)

oh my

more great word play.

(

d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:04, archived)

Shit... Just noticed the post further down..

And I couldn't decide on a title:

1. "I see blind people" or
2 "I can't fucking see anything"

(

Reverend Dan, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:02, archived)

"I can't see dead people"?

(

amygdala, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:10, archived)

shite i know but it'll do to get the leslie crowther ones off!

(pouletboy, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:55, archived)

graceful

(bluemerle, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:53, archived)

well

if i got to choose the winner.

I would choo choo choose you.

but i now see it is not a competition entry?!

(

d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:56, archived)

It's easy to forget

to set the Competition option when posting.

Anyone who does this can choose "Edit" and fix the problem.

(Indole Ring, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:06, archived)

You are sweet

I felt unworthy today.

(bluemerle, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:11, archived)

Lovely!

That kitten is the best.

/edit And he's back in his rightful position, Number one at Ratemykitten!

(Indole Ring, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:58, archived)

That kitten is a disease....

That we all suffer from...

(jubhosking, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:02, archived)

the mycathates you kitten

snarling is my fave pic ever of a kitten I think here

(

pep, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:06, archived)

Oh yes, The Arrrrrgh! kitten

makes an excellent pirate/sullen teen/mean drunk guy (etc)

(bluemerle, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:10, archived)

Some of the reasons I like kittens so much

are that they're pleasant to look at, and it's difficult to be offensive with one (see the raging argument below).

Oh, and here's a spazz link to my take on that particular kitten and a B3tan. Uncanny.

(Indole Ring, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:14, archived)

That should be submitted to the Fortean Times

a chilling similarity

(bluemerle, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:18, archived)

nice

rollerskates!
woo :)

(

rogan, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:59, archived)

Ginger cat!

That is great.

(

Slim has found god. He was down the back of the sofa., Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:06, archived)

BUPA training vid

(

Dai_Marzipan Ain't no party like an S Club party, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:50, archived)

(

pickledpizza Older, nicer, fluffier., Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:55, archived)

Shit Afternoon

The board sucks, ripping the piss out of CP sufferers is that the best you can do?

SIGH

outta here, hope it's better when I return!

(

ooh..anus!, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:50, archived)

Do you have CP?

Just out of curiosity.
Will understand why you're upset if you do.

(Amerella, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:52, archived)

and not otherwise?

You can't understand that it might be a bit crap to take the piss out of disabled people by stressing their inadvertently antisocial inability to control their bodies? Whether you're CP or not?

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:55, archived)

so it's OK as long as you're not a sufferer?

incidentally, i found it a bit shit as well

(

isthisyou?, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:55, archived)

probably upset

as the jokes are tired, some of them are nasty and many of them are just not that funny or clever. Can't argue with that, personally.

(

pep, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:56, archived)

In reply to all of you,

although some were worse than others, originally they were taking the piss out of Leslie Crowther and the language in the ad.

Having said that, I've lived with someone with CP and looked after a little boy with CP, and although some of the jokes were in bad taste (and would've been with reference to anyone), a lot of them didn't offend me.

(Amerella, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:03, archived)

What started off

as humour based on a the use of the word Spastic in an advert did indeed turn into something much nastier

(

christhebarker, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:04, archived)

exactly.

well put.

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:09, archived)

do what i do

ignore the bits you don't like =)

(

spacefish bong!, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:54, archived)

That's what I do too...

I have a selective optic nerve...

(

bloid ....dloibbloiddloibbloid...., Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:58, archived)

with u on that 100%

My new outlook:
I am bored with the same adverts on telly, they've all been piled into my brain over 2-5 years, but i put up with/ignore them, if i see the same pic on here twice, why should it bother me?
same with the daft text posts, i just skim them.

I'm a lot fluffier now :D

(

pickledpizza Older, nicer, fluffier., Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:01, archived)

Well said

you can't like everything.

(Nelly, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:03, archived)

wise words,

it's not the reposts, crap me!me!texts, sickness, in-jokes, or glass cocks that fuck this lovely site up, it's (and I've been one) the people who whinge about it, lengthening the trouble.

(

pickledpizza Older, nicer, fluffier., Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:07, archived)

Ah, more wise words.

but this is a good subject because people are talking about it, people do need to winge every now and again otherwise nothing changes.
Somethings however you do just have to ignore, on the other hand do something about it if you want the choice is yours and yours and yours.

(Nelly, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:13, archived)

yay!

less grumpiness, more baby animals! and evil babies...

(

spacefish bong!, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:04, archived)

on the evil grandparents now!

next week it might be evil spastics, or is that a bit iffy? mwahahaha

(

pickledpizza Older, nicer, fluffier., Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:08, archived)

Ooo,

you little beggar.

(Amerella, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:11, archived)

Gwarn.

Hear hear. I thought the fucking school holidays were over. Grow up the sorry lot of you. Juvenile little turds.

(tomsk, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:55, archived)

bearing in mind the date

something fairly unpleasant was bound to go off. Maybe people took up the meme a bit enthusiastically because at least it wasn't 9/11 jokes.

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:57, archived)

It was for a bit...

...but they got deleted...

(

bloid ....dloibbloiddloibbloid...., Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:59, archived)

I don't see why

you shouldn't be able to make a funny joke about an unfunny subject. In fact I thought the taboo-ness of the subject often made the jokes funnier, and I thought that was the essence of a lot of b3ta humour

(

Newington, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:59, archived)

fair point

but just because a subject's taboo, doesn't make it automatically funny. basically, poor show - could try harder.

(

amygdala, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:03, archived)

true - but humour

and some kind of intelligence is the key. Not just 'you're a spastic and it's funny when people fuck you over'.

(

pep, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:03, archived)

They weren't funny.

They were crap.
Don't try and glorify taking the piss out of the handicapped as "taboo-breaking". It's not. It's picking on an easy target because your too lazy or too stupid to think of something funny, and it makes me sick.
I'm off for a beer.

(tomsk, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:04, archived)

That's not what I'm trying to do

Some of the posts weren't funny; but in some of them, the fact that they were just blatantly offensive was the humour. I don't think any of the posts were actually at the expense of disabled people; though I admit I wouldn't like to try and explain that to a CP sufferer.

Anyway if you don't like the posts, don't just insult other people for not having made you laugh. Make something funny yourself and post it.

(

Newington, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:08, archived)

I think

you'd best had.

(Amerella, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:09, archived)

hmmm,

Everyone has their own tastes in what's funny... As for me, I'm going to start killing kittens due to exposure to them via this site... Everywhere I look, its that damn cat...

(jubhosking, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:10, archived)

go have a beer or 6 and think...

not everyone can be as good as you, there's a learning ladder for everyone to climb.

Don't spit from the roof, mate :)

(

pickledpizza Older, nicer, fluffier., Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:23, archived)

Exactly!

But they have to be funny on some level :-)

God, I sound like a bitch... hehehehe

That was meant all fluffy...

(

bloid ....dloibbloiddloibbloid...., Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:04, archived)

Oooh! Handbags at dawn!

The board isn't here just for your personal entertainment you know! Plus, we've been on much dodgier ethical ground before...

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:57, archived)

Hear

Hear. Well said sir. Banwagoneering of the PC kind after one of the more *popular* members voices dissent should not be encouraged.

(

sick_boy, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:58, archived)

If that's a dig,

I didn't ask him to delete it.
And I am entitled to my opinion.

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:03, archived)

No not a dig at you per se'

Just a trend I have been observing.

(

sick_boy, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:05, archived)

it does at least help

if they're funny

(

isthisyou?, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:58, archived)

I did get the feeling that

we were starting to get Golf Sale Syndrome for a bit there... seems to have calmed down now though...

Must be hometime ;-)

Which reminds me...

Night all! Off home to pack, as I have to move house on Saturday *sigh*

(

bloid ....dloibbloiddloibbloid...., Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:01, archived)

yeah

that's true.

(

rogan, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:01, archived)

it sure is

[just joining in on the convo there as ive been away doing work - shock horror]

year it was sick - but no more sick that dude wheres my car or fart jokes etc

(

hal9000 sme, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:28, archived)

got a lovely desktop you've done?

then wouldn't it be nice HERE?
just e-mail the url or html to the email addies on the left :)

(

pickledpizza Older, nicer, fluffier., Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:49, archived)

nice

first piccie.

:)

(

partychancer, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:55, archived)

George W just raised terror alert to highest level

(euro1492, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:45, archived)

is that

jack nicholson on the right?

(

timothy claypole, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:46, archived)

Son

We live in a world which has walls. And you need men on those walls. Men with guns.
Who's going to do it? You? You, Lieutenant Weinberg?
You weep for Santiago, and you curse the Marines. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that Santiago's death, while tragic probably saved lives, and that my existence, whilst grotesque an dincomprehensible to you, saves lives.
We use words like "honour", "code", "loyalty"...

(/Nicholson)

(

Natt, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:49, archived)

God bless America.

please fuck the rest of the world.

(

d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:51, archived)

WTF!!

I was thinking the same thing!!! Ha! I call for more photoshop'n Jack...

(jubhosking, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:50, archived)

I'm more scared that it's....

Gary Glitter behind them....

(

Si W, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:56, archived)

That Mexican film 'All about my mother'

What was all that about?

apols:dan antopolski

(wanbo, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:44, archived)

your mother.

(

mikeisbrill, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:46, archived)

hahahaha

(

rogan, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:48, archived)

thought about submitting the poster for honest!

(killer-bud, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:42, archived)

blair peach

was not an english-man
him come from new zealand

(

isthisyou?, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:45, archived)

doesnt say

that hes english there...

(

timothy claypole, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:48, archived)

didn't say he was

but he was killed by the police in england. (allegedly)

(killer-bud, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:48, archived)

sorry,

immediately lapsed into Linton Kwesi Johnson song with no context

he was a New Zealander apparently

(

isthisyou?, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:57, archived)

had to read that twice

thought you menat LKJ. I thought 'really? Are you SURE?"

(

pep, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:10, archived)

You can never have too much...

(jubhosking, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:41, archived)

Carving a turkey with a bomb probably

'The war against turkeys tm'

(

Your Mum, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:45, archived)

Me thinks...

(jubhosking, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:46, archived)

Further reducing an Americans freedom of speech and civil liberty.

Violating UN Human Rights Charters.
Whipping up right-wing American extremist fervour.
Lining the pockets of a certain Prime Minister, alledgedly.
Feeling real good about being the most powerful man on the planet and bullying third and fourth world countries.
or maybe someone will do the right thing and remember what happened in Dallas..........

(

d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:47, archived)

what?

" and remember what happened in Dallas" you mean he's gonna start up an oil company and put on padded bra's...

da doo da doo da doo doo doo doo doo...

(

timothy claypole, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:50, archived)

lol

(

partychancer, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:53, archived)

blimey

that even made me laugh!

(

pep, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:59, archived)

excuse my ignorance

but where is the fourth world?

(

amygdala, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:31, archived)

After Rudolf Hess was captured in Scotland,

Allied sources suggested that the mispronunciation of an umlaut
was behind one of the biggest strategical blunders of the Second World War...

(

Natt, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:40, archived)

clever

(

d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:48, archived)

thank

you.

I was getting worried that no on e would get it...

(

Natt, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:52, archived)

I just

think that perhaps people are having a strategic humour loss today.

(

d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:01, archived)

Sincere Apology...

Hi there!

Sorry for making the board a bit dull down below :-( I have removed the "comment-o-matic", and sincerely promise to never do anything like that again...

I think it was munkt0n who gave me the idea yesterday, I just didn't realise how fast it would go!

I have been looking for a picture of a sad apologetic puppy, but couldn't find one... At least it's the thought that counts ;-)

Yours apologetically,

bloid.

(

bloid ....dloibbloiddloibbloid...., Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:38, archived)

doggy

Maybe

(

Devious ...what?, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:42, archived)

Awwwww!

But I would file that under "inquisitive" ;-)

(

bloid ....dloibbloiddloibbloid...., Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:43, archived)

heres a sad pup

He looks like hes just shat in someones slippers - and been caught!!
bad boy, dirty boy, in your bed!

(

monkeymanblue mathematically safe, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:57, archived)

of course,

you could delete the entire thread and bring some of the work back that was pushed off...

(

isthisyou?, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:43, archived)

It only pushed one thing off surely?

And it was a pic I did :-)
[edit: I mean my post...not the thing I pushed off...]

(

bloid ....dloibbloiddloibbloid...., Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:44, archived)

Reposts and crap one-liners

are far more insidious than long threads.

(Indole Ring, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:48, archived)

Agreed :-)

Hehe, how about crawly apology posts ;-)

*giggle*

(

bloid ....dloibbloiddloibbloid...., Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:49, archived)

It's

20 threads to a page; length of any one thread has no bearing on the threads per page count.

(

bob dinosaur, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:45, archived)

better still

why don't folks remove thier automatic replies?

(

Craymen, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:47, archived)

Oh well...

...it's off into the depth of the spazz now, by tomorrow, it will all be forgotten :-)

(

bloid ....dloibbloiddloibbloid...., Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:48, archived)

True.

(

Craymen, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:53, archived)

I thought it was funny

but only if done once, which it was. So woo to you.

(Indole Ring, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:43, archived)

well

i thought it was a nice ickle bit of hack1ng

hides under desk

(

no_funny_name heart of gold, nerves of steel, knob of butter, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:46, archived)

YAY

The basics for my new site is up and running and I would apreciate your constructive comments, none of the buttons work yet because there is no content yet. But the framework is there. If any of you would like to do a new www.jiva.me.uk it would be much apreciated. As pink and fluffy as possible too.
thank you all for helping me be so addicted I had to get my own site.

(

jiva nearly always up for a game of scrabble, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:35, archived)

I can't get through

and my pings time out :(

(

bigdave, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:38, archived)

It's PINK

(Nelly, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:40, archived)

it work for me though??
I'm confused, dumb blonde moment...

(

jiva nearly always up for a game of scrabble, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:41, archived)

I got through this time!

Whee!
It's very pink, isn't it? And there's a spelling goof...

Other than that, it's a start, innit?

(

bigdave, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:44, archived)

AAAARRRGGGHHHHH!!!!!!

my eyes, the pink, no not the pink.

what is the site for BTW?

(

Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:40, archived)

HA HA

I thought it may shock you all! erm, it's a surprise, no well it's going to be a blog when I get to it.

(

jiva nearly always up for a game of scrabble, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:43, archived)

Is there a spelling mistake?

The 'C' button is rather close to the 'V' button.

(wanbo, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:41, archived)

Those Flash buttons

seem to make it scroll badly. Also they don't seem to do much.....

(

ybanrab, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:41, archived)

I want to

do my own buttons but I didn't have time and needed to get it up

(

jiva nearly always up for a game of scrabble, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:45, archived)

I don't seem to see those

buttons. I think I can see where they should be though.

(

bigdave, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:48, archived)

Yay,

that is thoroughly pink :)

(Amerella, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:42, archived)

beeeyootifully pink

I think it's gorgeous.

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:52, archived)

Fank you

very me, pink and fluffy.

(

jiva nearly always up for a game of scrabble, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:55, archived)

I like

the rose petals.

(Amerella, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:00, archived)

Mr pedantic says

it's "my past" NOT my passed.

(

koit WWW.HIGHASAKOIT.CO.UK, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:42, archived)

I said

eariler I was keyboard dyslexic

(

jiva nearly always up for a game of scrabble, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:44, archived)

pink and fluffy is the name of the game

it reminds me of my m3ss3ng3r settings =)

edit: very nice, by the way!

(

spacefish bong!, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:43, archived)

re: pubes

what's wrong with them anyway?

(

isthisyou?, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:34, archived)

They are really crunchy.

I hate the sensation of them in my mouth.

(

Your Mum, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:35, archived)

fair enough

however women and men have pubes and children do not. Who would you rather have a relationship of a sexual nature with? ok. Don't answer.

(

pep, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:37, archived)

Definately a clean shaven woman.

Or at least one who trims.
If women are going to complain that we don't know our way around, at least make it easy for us to see what we're doing.

(

bigdave, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:41, archived)

That's a really bizarre reply my dear.

*thinks of a witty responce...fails*

...er a Dolphin?

(

Your Mum, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:42, archived)

have you

considered wearing an apron when cooking?

(

rogan, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:39, archived)

that

made me giggle like a schoolgirl

(

youknowyouloveit, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:40, archived)

:)))))

(

Your Mum, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:43, archived)

They get in your teeth

And what are you meant to do with them anyway?
It's not like you can style them or anything.

(

bigdave, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:35, archived)

That's

the funniest thing I've read all day!

(

ooh..anus!, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:36, archived)

well i like them

(

spacefish bong!, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:39, archived)

Me likes

pubes - especially cropped and shaped ones..........they add to the viewing pleasure. On women I must add......blokes cocks and pubes can fock off.

(

koit WWW.HIGHASAKOIT.CO.UK, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:41, archived)

There's no need

to have porn with guys in.
That's what lesbians porn is for.

(

bigdave, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:46, archived)

sometimes you need guys

to deliver the really shit pieces of dialogue. they can do it better i think.

(

mikeisbrill, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:49, archived)

Best one I ever heard

was from a naked guy in a Color Climax Coporation of Copenhagen viddy - presented with a woman using a Galliano bottle for something it was not designed he exclaimed

"Jesus wept!"

(

bigdave, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 17:00, archived)

i worry sometimes that we're trying to make ourselves into

porn stars or sexual mutants

(

isthisyou?, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:41, archived)

you'd have a job making a sexual mutant out of my pubes

unless you had really tiny knitting needles

(

spacefish bong!, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:48, archived)

*tears of laughter*

...you rock, sir.

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:53, archived)

good for flossing

(

partychancer, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:40, archived)

they are racists, bigots and homophobes

who preach intolerance and have been responsible for the deaths of over six million people.
oh, *pubes*? i misread that as *Nazis*....

(

mikeisbrill, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:41, archived)

Nowt

they're great (in moderation)

(

helmetcream, Wed 11 Sep 2002, 16:44, archived)

« Older messages | Newer messages »