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This is a link post Text inspector - counts the syllables and finds the rhyme scheme
This is a really handy java applet for either working out the type of poem you may be attempting to work out or for those of you who write poetry and want to stick to closed forms like the sonnet. It counts the syllables for you and will also tell you what rhyming scheme you've used.
Incredibly useful for poets and critics alike.

You could also use it for ensuring your obscene limericks scan properly.
 (I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 11:59, Reply)
This is a normal post that is rather cool
taaa.
 (I helped save b3ta! Nostrebor can't be everything all the time., Wed 21 Jan 2009, 12:25, Reply)
This is a normal post Ha!
I read that as Tax Inspector and got very confused.
 (I helped save b3ta! Blackdogmanguitar is out with Fat Larry's Jazz Band on, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 12:30, Reply)
This is a normal post Hmm...
Now I'm considering if the government could tax poetry. Perhaps it could work rather like the window tax back in the 18th century....

TS Elliot would have been fucked.

Haiku writers would be laughing - especially if there was a personal allowance.

This all sounds terribly 1984ish.

It could work.
 (I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 12:33, Reply)
This is a normal post Write to Darling now!

(I helped save b3ta! Blackdogmanguitar is out with Fat Larry's Jazz Band on, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 12:35, Reply)
This is a normal post *Writes*
*Demands 10% cut*

*Hides*
 (I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 13:01, Reply)
This is a normal post ^this exactly^

(I helped save b3ta! t0ria has forgotten how this all works, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 13:36, Reply)
This is a link post Apparently this is what's in the car that follows the President around
just in case they need to really assassinate him.
(I helped save b3ta! krang, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 11:58, Reply)
This is a normal post *want*

(I helped save b3ta! Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 12:07, Reply)
This is a normal post *GOT*

(I helped save b3ta! redazril I LIKE DRUGS!, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 12:09, Reply)
This is a normal post Those casings are going to scratch the paintwork.

(I helped save b3ta! Brandy_Bumwinkle, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 12:14, Reply)
This is a normal post fucckkkk!!!!!
thats a bit mental!
 (I helped save b3ta! skeltonator Needs some new daps., Wed 21 Jan 2009, 12:39, Reply)
This is a normal post He's got a goddamn minigun!

(I helped save b3ta! LemonEntryMyDearWatson This time, Moriarty, the hand is on the other foot, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 12:57, Reply)
This is a normal post i want your clothes...
your boots and your motorcycle!
 (Yo!Mcnutty, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 13:31, Reply)
This is a normal post Uzi 9 millimeter, Plasma Rifle, etc, etc :)

(I helped save b3ta! lord turkey boy and the cleft of venus, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 13:59, Reply)
This is a normal post In the USA
A 9 year old can walk into a WalMart and buy one of these. It's a disgrace.
 (Necroflange, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 14:27, Reply)
This is a normal post when I was 9, I would have quite happily sold my Mum for one of those

(I helped save b3ta! boyo81 was laying down his ordinance on, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 15:11, Reply)
This is a normal post Well 9 year old plainly get too much pocket money then in the US

(I helped save b3ta! lord turkey boy and the cleft of venus, Thu 22 Jan 2009, 20:11, Reply)
This is a normal post Ha!
.. and yes, it works perfectly in the bennyhillifier:
james.nerdiphythesoul.com/bennyhillifier/?id=DvYV5QZtevk
 (I helped save b3ta! xandmi, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 14:46, Reply)
This is a link post Got a sniper rifle? Nowhere to put your iPod Touch?
If I'd made this, I'd compo it.

But sadly I fear it is real...
 (I helped save b3ta! prince-igor si tacuisses, philosophus mansisses, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 10:40, Reply)
This is a normal post Holy crap.
The fact that there's an iSnipe application in existence as well.

What does that do for your cuddly right-on image, Apple?
 (I helped save b3ta! barryheadwound Mul-ti-pass? Multipass!, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 11:09, Reply)
This is a normal post 8 years too late, if you ask me

(I helped save b3ta! The Coast Of Yemen, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 11:10, Reply)
This is a normal post ^this.

(Yo!Mcnutty, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 13:35, Reply)
This is a normal post The secret service will be bashing your door in soon if you're not careful...

(I helped save b3ta! boyo81 was laying down his ordinance on, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 15:13, Reply)
This is a normal post Presumably you'd have a playlist
of the Dead Kennedys on it.
 (I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 12:00, Reply)
This is a normal post
badum-tish
 (I helped save b3ta! barryheadwound Mul-ti-pass? Multipass!, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 12:12, Reply)
This is a normal post Eye-than-queue!

(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 12:30, Reply)
This is a normal post try the shrimp, i'm here all week

(I helped save b3ta! boyo81 was laying down his ordinance on, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 15:17, Reply)
This is a link post Chrysler says "thank you"... America says "fuck you!"
Chrysler makes a monumental misjudgement and the American people let them know big-time
 (I helped save b3ta! Mr Gear the gay-maker, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 10:39, Reply)
This is a normal post Ooooff
Talk about "opening your mouth just to change feet"
 (I helped save b3ta! The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 11:19, Reply)
This is a normal post I think it would be best to sit down to change feet.
You could probably try doing so by holding onto something above your head (like a chin up bar) but that's a lot of effort. Also, you may need at least one free hand to guide the foot in accurately.

It would be a good idea, prior to changing feet, to wash the one that's not already in the mouth. You've probably been hopping around the office on that foot for some time, so it'll be quite sweaty and dirty. It you've still got shoes on, then it's especially important to think about cleaning. Think of all the nasty stuff, like dog do, that'll be on them. Yuck.
 (I helped save b3ta! giraffen, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 13:10, Reply)
This is a normal post I thought it was quite sweet
better to say thanks than just pretend it didn't happen no?
 (Stocksie, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 13:51, Reply)
This is a normal post ouch
Was a bit foolhardy with that ad - what were they thinking. Still good to see they allowed the comments up and didn't cull the more negative ones...

I still find it insane the MPG US cars get. I drive an 11 year old car, a fairly big one at that, with a 2 litre engine and STILL get 40 to 45 mpg - my dad has the same car but the diesel version and gets 65 mpg on the motorway! This is a bog standard Rover 400 - nothing fancy. So why can't they produce something similar in the US? Is it that much cheaper to build an inefficent car? Even the Prius advertises 65 but only really delivers 55 mpg... it's madness!
 (crowcrow - wasting domain names since, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 13:52, Reply)
This is a normal post
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Miles_per_gallon

"Note that because the imperial gallon is significantly larger than the U.S. gallon, MPG figures are 20.095% higher in the UK than in the U.S. for the same real fuel economy."
 (I helped save b3ta! but the hedgehog can never be buggered at all foreskin of the apocalypse, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 16:09, Reply)
This is a normal post If they culled the more negative ones
They wouldn't have any comments at all. You'd think they'd lace them with comments from Chrysler employees or something. Maybe they hate themselves too.
 (Cap'n, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 16:45, Reply)
This is a link post DJ Abstraction - Beyond Consciousness 16 (Download Available) I made this!
Thanks for those of you who chooned in last Thursday, reaching a personal best peak of 1074! =D Bit of delayed pimping here, so please enjoy :)


1. BenDJ feat. Sushy - Me & Myself (Diego Abaribi & Paolo Sandrini Nagada Mix) [Tambour] PH
2. DJ Tatana - Spring Breeze (Martin Roth SummerStyle Remix) [Sirup Records] PH
3. The Chaser - Dont Look Back (M. Pravda Remix) [National Sound] PT
4. Deepwide feat. Josh Money - Take Me In (Adymus Remix) [Enhanced Recordings] T
5. Front - Cosmic Winter (Fluid's Remix) [Shah-Music Digital] T
6. Supergroover - Jellyfish (Prema van Smuuf Remix) [Padded Cell Productions] PT
7. Alex Bartlett, Dyor - Floating Beyond (Lange Remix) [Lange Recordings] T
8. Emiele Coolen feat. Marco Joosten - Flower (Original Mix) [Excessive Records] T
9. Essence, Solarstone - Lunar Rings (Heatbeat Dub) [Solaris Recordings] T
10. Super8, Tab feat. Alyna - Delusion (Original Mix) [Anjunabeats] T

Total length: 00:57:54


Download 'Beyond Consciousness 16' (Including NFO, CUE, FLYER) [109331 K]
Visit DJAbstraction.com
DJ Abstraction @ MySpace
Vote for DJ Abstraction @ The DJ List
DJ Abstraction - Facebook Group
 (I helped save b3ta! abstraction is somewhere out there..., Wed 21 Jan 2009, 10:33, Reply)
This is a normal post Thanks...downloading
Trance isnt usually my thing, well it used to be, but have drifted into producing electro and hardly ever listen to trance anymore. Downloaded the fabio stein year mix and was blown away by some of the tech trance from 2008. Awesome, awesome stuff so looking forward to this.

Let me know if you want the fabio stein year mix and I'll send you a link...
 (The Archduke of South London I'm in your Girlfriend eating her organs, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 10:44, Reply)
This is a normal post :D Thanks for downloading mate
Yeah I certainly don't listen to Trance all of the time, I prefer allot of the uplifting progressive house to be honest, with nice vocals in. But as the station is a Trance station I have to mix within limits.

I'd love to have a link to that fabio stein mix and grab a copy of it :D and I hope you enjoy the set.
 (I helped save b3ta! abstraction is somewhere out there..., Wed 21 Jan 2009, 11:08, Reply)
This is a normal post As usual,
awesome.
 (I helped save b3ta! the RAND corporation a.k.a. Kevin Saxe-Coburg-Gotha, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 21:12, Reply)
This is a link post Hope Of Tomorrow Today I made this!
Still can't believe what happened yesterday - only 46 years since Martin Luther King did his "I Have A Dream" speech, Barry O stood in the same place to take his place. Incredible. Well done America, the rest of the world let out a collective sigh of relief. Anyway, I cobbled this together.

If you are expecting more Aretha stuff, you'll be disappointed.. although I did want to animate the huge bow on her hat spinning round, and her taking off like a big fat helicopter as everyone waved - but I lack the skills needed.
(Pesky Young Scamp, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 10:33, Reply)
This is a normal post That's rather beautiful
And yes, well done America. Who would have thunk?
 (I helped save b3ta! xandmi, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 10:39, Reply)
This is a normal post aw thanks
its nice to have someone intelligent as the most powerful person on earth isn't it?
 (Pesky Young Scamp, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 10:54, Reply)
This is a normal post tis early days yet :)

(I helped save b3ta! Firkinfedup last shat on your wife's tits at, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 11:13, Reply)
This is a normal post that was rather woo. well played.

(I helped save b3ta! Nostrebor can't be everything all the time., Wed 21 Jan 2009, 11:37, Reply)
This is a normal post thanks!!

(Pesky Young Scamp, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 11:50, Reply)
This is a normal post That was just lully!!
nice work!
*clicks*
 (I helped save b3ta! skeltonator Needs some new daps., Wed 21 Jan 2009, 13:04, Reply)
This is a normal post very nice indeed
clicks
 (I helped save b3ta! thiswasmyclone, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 15:18, Reply)
This is a normal post Nice
Clicks
 (I helped save b3ta! Terry Oblong There's nobody here but us chickens on, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 15:30, Reply)
This is a normal post Is there *nothing* the Benny Hillifier doesn't work with!?
james.nerdiphythesoul.com/bennyhillifier/speedup.php?id=flv-hmXQ7ek

*clicks*
 (I helped save b3ta! teedyay, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 16:06, Reply)
This is a normal post Aww, it's so brotherly and loving, you big gay.

(I helped save b3ta! Digeridude Lord Wellington's Beef Trapeze, Sat 24 Jan 2009, 2:44, Reply)
This is a link post Fart in a Spacesuit I made this!
Cassette Boy vs Bowie. Quite simply the funniest thing I have ever heard.
(I helped save b3ta! Fat Boab of dailyreckless.com fame, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 10:15, Reply)
This is a normal post Ha ha, short but sweet
I like the other cassette boy stuffs too.
 (I helped save b3ta! Mr Gear the gay-maker, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 11:53, Reply)
This is a normal post ...shitting in a tin can...

(I helped save b3ta! boyo81 was laying down his ordinance on, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 15:15, Reply)
This is a link post BNP Canvas print
Remember the classic Paul Ross canvas print on Amazon? Well that was classy. This, on the other hand, could only be bought by absolute twunts (though, it does feature what appears to be Matt Lucas in a comedy wig next to that gurning tosser).
 (I helped save b3ta! Super Grover Time machine..?I haven't invented any time machine, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 10:02, Reply)
This is a normal post Hahaha: the review is great
"At first I wasn't sure why anyone would want a picture of three gurning far-right thugs and a trophy wife...that was until I mounted it where I could throw darts at it whilst passing a motion on the toilet. Priceless!"
 (I helped save b3ta! Fishcat Difficult difficult lemon difficult., Wed 21 Jan 2009, 10:13, Reply)
This is a normal post Love it..
"Customers who bought this also bought..."

* Oracular Spectacular, by MGMT.

So there we have it.. All MGMT fans are racist.
 (I helped save b3ta! bluemeat has been best of all the animals since, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 11:14, Reply)
This is a normal post I knew it!!
oracular spectacular is about the Nurmberg address, and electric feel is about the concentration camps.

Those sneaky facists
 (I helped save b3ta! boyo81 was laying down his ordinance on, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 15:17, Reply)
This is a normal post Fancy a game of darts, anyone?

(I helped save b3ta! DrPrunesquallor is determined to post more as of, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 13:36, Reply)
This is a normal post Trophy Wife?

(I helped save b3ta! lord turkey boy and the cleft of venus, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 14:08, Reply)
This is a link post Physics is bad ass
Is this GC? I do hope not. Spent all night watching science videos and this one made me think of Postgate. Who always had soup on his tie.
(Cosmic Gypo SometimesyouhavetoBitetheDog, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 9:52, Reply)
This is a normal post That was pretty cool
See, this is what kid's TV should be made of.
 (I helped save b3ta! shovelboy This is bad - Two minutes to Belgium, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 10:10, Reply)
This is a normal post this^

(I helped save b3ta! TheAlmightyBeev, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 10:14, Reply)
This is a link post Condensed History: The Norman Conquest I made this!


The Battle of Hastings was the world's first rolling news event, documented and reported in the cutting-edge medium of sewing by dead French ladies. However, nobody does sewing these days, so it is high time the whole affair was retold in a language today's modern youth will understand: Txt spk and TOP LOLZ.

Royal butler and not-a-thief-at-all Paul Burrell: Hey look up there! The Goodyear blimp!

King Harold: COCK. Right in the eye. Oh, I am ded

NOTE: Value of historical accuracy may go down as well as up
 (I helped save b3ta! Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 9:12, Reply)
This is a normal post This...
...would have made me do A-level history.
 (I helped save b3ta! TheAlmightyBeev, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 9:43, Reply)
This is a normal post Ten thousand hairy arsed Saxon pfffffft
I like this one as much as the Samual Pepys one, great stuff.
 (I helped save b3ta! The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 11:04, Reply)
This is a normal post There'll be a Samuel Pepys book
...just as soon as I write it.
 (I helped save b3ta! Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 11:15, Reply)
This is a normal post If I had the cash I would pay the advance. just to read it.
:)
 (I helped save b3ta! The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 11:30, Reply)
This is a normal post Held up by the fact...
...I'm a lazy bastard. After a year and a half of (not) writing, I'm up to February 12th 1660. A whole six weeks of Pepys Diarying.
 (I helped save b3ta! Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 12:43, Reply)
This is a link post I just want this everywhere. I made this!
Judge for yourself.
 (I helped save b3ta! Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Wed 21 Jan 2009, 9:00, Reply)
This is a link post Bendy Bus Song I made this!
Singalonga song inspired by that petition a couple of weeks back. With added accordion by mushroom.
(I helped save b3ta! Fat Boab of dailyreckless.com fame, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 8:36, Reply)
This is a normal post Ha ha. Nice

(I helped save b3ta! Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Wed 21 Jan 2009, 9:51, Reply)
This is a normal post top stuff!!
I havent ever seen a london bendy bus but I've been on them in other places and this would be awesome.
 (I helped save b3ta! Nostrebor can't be everything all the time., Wed 21 Jan 2009, 10:09, Reply)
This is a normal post ace!

(dingodrum Drums 'n that., Wed 21 Jan 2009, 13:04, Reply)
This is a link post The ultimate romantic gesture - a replica Portal gun

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 8:10, Reply)
This is a normal post I'm making a note here: huge success
It's hard to overstate my satisfaction
 (I helped save b3ta! The Coast Of Yemen, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 8:35, Reply)
This is a normal post Very good!
I think I want one of them more than children of my own. It's for this reason, and this reason alone, why I will probably never have kids. Still, I'll have a fucking cool Portal replica gun!
 (I helped save b3ta! redazril I LIKE DRUGS!, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 8:57, Reply)
This is a normal post This device is more valuable than the organs and combined income of everyone in
***subject hometown here***
 (I helped save b3ta! chart cat has an itch, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 9:00, Reply)
This is a link post Disappearing World

(Chungo Has been fapping non-stop since, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 6:46, Reply)
This is a link post Sack Astley
This is how Little Big Planet rolls.
(greenycrimson I stole the from pyschotherapist, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 2:33, Reply)
This is a normal post I'm going to bed

(dingodrum Drums 'n that., Wed 21 Jan 2009, 2:34, Reply)
This is a normal post Can I come?

(Fuiru Sting, where is thy death?, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 3:09, Reply)
This is a normal post I don't know, can you?
I haven't got to bed yet
 (dingodrum Drums 'n that., Wed 21 Jan 2009, 3:34, Reply)
This is a normal post play my level.
'The Ballad of Meat Monkey'. It's ace.
 (I helped save b3ta! Kung_Fu_Russ ran out of amusing signatures on, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 9:37, Reply)
This is a link post Dissapearing Cucumber Gumtree Dating Advert!! NSFW
And they say romance is dead!

Not particularly NSFW since its gumtree, but im being cautious.
 (RogueIntruder, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 1:21, Reply)
This is a normal post lolwut?
i wud realy like 2 get 2 no u more and see wat other food u like
 (I helped save b3ta! but the hedgehog can never be buggered at all foreskin of the apocalypse, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 1:35, Reply)
This is a normal post Pineapple
and ferret.
 (Frozen_Banana Shaved against the grain; thoroughly unrewarding., Wed 21 Jan 2009, 2:50, Reply)
This is a normal post the fuck?

(I helped save b3ta! Paster of Muppets is an incredible screen name, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 4:15, Reply)
This is a normal post I thought that was Dexter
now ill go read it
 (I helped save b3ta! rootsxrocks, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 6:19, Reply)
This is a normal post that figures, he saw her by broadwalk
knowle, shithole.
 (I helped save b3ta! skeltonator Needs some new daps., Wed 21 Jan 2009, 13:40, Reply)
This is a link post DJ Scotch Egg
He makes music with Gameboys. I'm going to see him next week. I may just wee in my pants with excitement.
(KnackerDwarf, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 1:15, Reply)
This is a link post World leaders messages to President Barack Obama
Is it me, or are we missing Prince Philip's message...
"Who let that bloody nigger in..."
 (I helped save b3ta! DavyBoyInGravyJoy Grey Goose Vodka on Ice, nothing finer, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 1:06, Reply)
This is a normal post Hehe
"I hope America will make a change in the third world. But c'mon, this is America we're talking about. Hnnnnng. Joey!!!!!!" - Hugo Chavez.
 (I helped save b3ta! greedydave cries when he wanks, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 1:20, Reply)
This is a link post So yeah my friends are in a band,
Check the out yes?
(I helped save b3ta! [DTMX] Fishing hook, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 0:36, Reply)
This is a normal post your 'friends band' are awful
maybe listen to some actual hardcore and come back when you're over katy perry
 (iainhasaface is freezing, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 0:40, Reply)
This is a normal post o man, fucking love that Katy Perry cover
what can i say, i laughed, i cried, i laughed more. i couldn't believe it. So i watched it again. The crying still hasn't stopped ...
 (mintie, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 0:41, Reply)
This is a normal post Arrrrggghhh!
My ears!
 (jlkgjsfhoj, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 0:47, Reply)
This is a normal post Just another hardcore garage band....
....that are not very good.
 (Colostomy Bag Explosion Lubing the gears of commercialism, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 1:12, Reply)
This is a normal post ha
least katy perry was hot
 (pancakes_n_ham, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 6:12, Reply)
This is a normal post should keep practising
cos at present, they are shit.
 (discodaz *generic witty comment*, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 8:18, Reply)
This is a normal post arghhhh!
the noise!...it hurts!
 (I helped save b3ta! MrGomez and David Bellamy's big pubey beard, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 9:05, Reply)
This is a normal post shitbox

(I helped save b3ta! mookay immune to icons since, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 10:18, Reply)
This is a normal post this is just what the world needs

(Sacamacamojo was lurking right up until, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 11:38, Reply)
This is a link post Aretha Franklin tells someone to “shutup” during Barack Obama Inauguration
Sorry for another "Aretha Franklin" one but if you blinked you'd missed it...
(I helped save b3ta! Darklord, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 0:31, Reply)
This is a normal post Poor Urethra Sprinklin.
Mental case.
 (Jimbotfu Bummed in the gob again, Wed 21 Jan 2009, 10:27, Reply)

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