Life - uh - finds a way
www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-54121551
Invisible Wizard - 13th Level Scrote, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 22:03,
Reply)
Finally my google search has come up trumps
I wouldn't recommend anyone else tries it.
buffet_the_appetite_slayer ٩(●̮̃•)۶ jacked in to the ICE on, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 19:01,
Reply)
HUUUUUUUUUUUURK
(
evil_andy Stick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 19:18,
Reply)
Mmm, cyanobacteria...
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brb man-child cuck corporate supplicant fuck, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 19:19,
Reply)
what was the search words?
mermaids with balls?
blue balls and mermaids
(, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 19:31, Reply)
Blue waffle
It's an b3ta in-joke. You can probably find the pic on an image search. It's pretty boring tbh
(, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 22:01, Reply)
Must be ignoring the proponents of this in-joke
- been b3tard for man and boy, but I ain't never seen no blue waffle.
(
Invisible Wizard - 13th Level Scrote, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 22:10,
Reply)
Google it
You can absolutely trust me. Make sure safe search is off
(, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 23:39, Reply)
Who has "safe search" on?
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buffet_the_appetite_slayer ٩(●̮̃•)۶ jacked in to the ICE on, Sat 12 Sep 2020, 3:46,
Reply)
Me neither.
Must be a /links in-joke, which disinclines me to look further into it. It's probably massive racism.
(, Sat 12 Sep 2020, 19:55, Reply)
Think it's a web 2.0 thing.
We're old web, and goatse is the shock site of choice in the style guide.
knowyourmeme.com/memes/blue-waffle (SFW)
(
monkeon schmonkeon, Sat 12 Sep 2020, 21:17,
Reply)
Caution: if swallowed, induce vomiting immediately.
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mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 21:51,
Reply)
Probably both eventually
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FeralCatMan Long ads need comments sections, Sat 12 Sep 2020, 15:38,
Reply)
It’s my candle day!
Have some Burial to start Friday off.
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wheresthefish Partly filled with wrong, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 16:22,
Reply)
Happy 18 candules!
You old git
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FeralCatMan Long ads need comments sections, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 17:21,
Reply)
wheresthecandles, more like
congratulations, you are officially legal (in most countries)
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Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 17:36,
Reply)
I have no idea who you are but happy candle day!
(
Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 18:06,
Reply)
If you find out, please let me know.
That's the problem with old age, you forget things...
(
wheresthefish Partly filled with wrong, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 19:32,
Reply)
b3ta.com/board/324030
Obviously the image involved has long since been eaten by the internet worms.
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wheresthefish Partly filled with wrong, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 19:31,
Reply)
Congratulations
Hope you find the fish one day
(
Mudface The web isn't callipygian, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 18:17,
Reply)
Me too, the smell is getting unbearable.
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wheresthefish Partly filled with wrong, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 19:34,
Reply)
I stayed up late for this moment
b3ta.com/links/1550007
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spazzcaptain Misses Valin @, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 19:55,
Reply)
You shouldn’t have.
I just can’t reciprocate that level of commitment.
(
wheresthefish Partly filled with wrong, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 20:41,
Reply)
I got nothing for ya. Nothing!
But loooooooooooooooove
Flip your wings and fly to Daddy,
Take a dive and swim to Daddy,
Hit the floor and crawl to Daddy,
(
unclepills, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 21:23,
Reply)
congratulations.
enjoy the day.
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tromboner cherophobia is my kind of fun, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 21:56,
Reply)
Mau I also recc Gin and Juice covered by The Gourds
youtu.be/H4hGSR5njZE
and of course as I said before
The High Class Family Butchers' cover of Mamma Mia
(
unclepills, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 22:25,
Reply)
Change your agreed agreements, in a limited and specific way
I made this!
So, This is for changing agreed agreements, but only in a specific and limited way.
I figure it may be helpful, or maybe not.
wtf do I know.
(
Saner, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 16:09,
Reply)
I like the idea
but there are quite a few spelling, punctuation and grammar mistakes that diminish the impact, IMHO. Unless they are part of the joke and I just don't get it.
(
brb man-child cuck corporate supplicant fuck, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 17:55,
Reply)
speling werds n using funy dots iz so lst cent
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FeralCatMan Long ads need comments sections, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 19:45,
Reply)
spling iz racis whyte supremacis opresion ov altnate gramar
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simbosan nuck nuck nuck, Sat 12 Sep 2020, 0:48,
Reply)
Honestly though, my spelling has always been awful.
I miss my old editor, who used to help me out with that shit.
:(
(
Saner, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 20:21,
Reply)
It's not just the spelling.
The misuse of the reflexive pronoun is making my teeth hurt.
(
Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Sat 12 Sep 2020, 9:55,
Reply)
That also pissed myself off.
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brb man-child cuck corporate supplicant fuck, Sat 12 Sep 2020, 16:07,
Reply)
can you do one for HMRC, specifically one about not submitting end of year shit
(, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 19:33, Reply)
Create a firenado in the comfort of your own lab
Spinning burning hotness
(, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 11:36, Reply)
I get the opposite...
seems like his body is way too big for his head
(, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 11:44, Reply)
Enormous hands. And his head looks like it was drawn in afterwards.
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evil_andy Stick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 11:52,
Reply)
www.youtube.com/watch?v=__MUf2Qv6_U
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Fadgebadger Sweaty sumo wanks for everyone!, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 14:07,
Reply)
bloody mental
seeing bob on "would I lie to you", really cracks me up
www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yfawvs5PouA
and the other dentist one
www.youtube.com/watch?v=kgI3Y7gxMO4
(, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 14:43, Reply)
It's his neck. It's Neck Guy. He wears someone elses neck.
Also only opens his eyes to blink like Reid Tamaranda.
(
brb man-child cuck corporate supplicant fuck, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 15:23,
Reply)
it's none of these things, it's the continuous blinking
(
simbosan nuck nuck nuck, Sat 12 Sep 2020, 0:52,
Reply)
Would be cool
with three burning pots of stuff in the middle of the bin - in different colours.
(, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 12:00, Reply)
This Dick Pic Does Not Exist - AI-generated, erm, dick pics (NSFW, obviously)
NSFW
Behold, the internet high water mark of 2020. You too can spend hours getting lost in thousands of slightly weird dick pics. Very NSFW.
From the about page: "Like most men, I had the problem of too many women asking for my dick pics.
So I spent the last 2 years learning linear algebra, bayesian statistics, and multivariable calculus so that I could finally keep up with the demand by generating thousands of fake penises with AI.
This website features those thousands of penises, do with it what you will."
(, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 9:02, Reply)
there's surprisingly few
that don't look like a trip to the doctor would be advisable
(, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 9:45, Reply)
Are you referring to the link
or willies in general?
Viewed objectively (which, let's face it, is impossible) I think all genitals are not that pretty.
(, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 12:02, Reply)
My bifurcated dick
brings all the girls/gays/urologists to the yard.
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FeralCatMan Long ads need comments sections, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 14:30,
Reply)
Block Pushing Puzzle Game But You Can Time Travel - sokoban-like game with time warps
I made this!
A puzzle game I made. Push the crates to the goal squares, making use of the handy time warps provided, but don't let your past self see you!
(
Newington, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 8:04,
Reply)
I literally have no idea what's going on in this. Is the other guy doing my moves from earlier?
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evil_andy Stick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 10:43,
Reply)
So, when do they appear? And where?
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evil_andy Stick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 11:31,
Reply)
wherever you were at the point you travel back to
For further information please consult Temporal Mechanics 101 by Hawking, Newton et al, 2067
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Newington, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 13:28,
Reply)
I think maybe I've got the frame of reference wrong. Or something. I love the idea, I just can't wrap my head around how it works.
(
evil_andy Stick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 13:45,
Reply)
Thanks!
For what it's worth, I did try for some sort of learning curve. Game design is hard.
(
Newington, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 14:00,
Reply)
It's fine. Creating a learning curve for dullards like me must be incredibly frustrating.
(
evil_andy Stick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 14:41,
Reply)
I got to level 6
insteresting idea, although I dont fully understand it/ get it, you need more easier/ learning levels to begin with
(, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 11:36, Reply)
I mean, it's a puzzle game
Wouldn't be much good if you weren't puzzled
(
Newington, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 13:36,
Reply)
Same here.
Crazy.
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joefish It's hard for thee to kick against the pricks, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 14:52,
Reply)
Ah, you can use the time warp more than once...
(
joefish It's hard for thee to kick against the pricks, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 15:03,
Reply)
Yes, but having two extra 'me' didn't seem to help
I get the need to match movement and timing but couldn't make it to the far end
(, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 18:12, Reply)
A lot of people seem to not be noticing that you can press space to stand still
if that helps
(
Newington, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 18:17,
Reply)
Got that
and that you can use same block twice but like others, I can't do 7
(
My Name was saying these words inside your head on, Sat 12 Sep 2020, 0:37,
Reply)
This is superb
and I'm stuck on 7.
(
brb man-child cuck corporate supplicant fuck, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 19:18,
Reply)
That's a great concept
But oh my god my head hurts! I want to get up the learning curve so much but I'm not going to have the time any time soon.
(
tarka_dall Like normal dall, only a bit more spicy, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 22:03,
Reply)
it's good
but the learning curve is too steep, and I could muddle through the first few levels without really understanding the lessons, so I hit a brick wall at 7.
(, Sat 12 Sep 2020, 9:48, Reply)
Needs more AI generated cocks
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Fadgebadger Sweaty sumo wanks for everyone!, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 17:01,
Reply)
dog not good at its job
sorry it's twitter.... and in portrait
but cute until the gore at the end
(, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 22:42, Reply)
Red really shows up against white, doesn't it?
(
VicJameson : fucking internet virgins since, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 12:12,
Reply)
My Mum - A Cartoon Life
I made this!
Buried the old dear yesterday. Thought the world deserved to see her talent so I took to the Twitter to share her 'toons and her story. Hankies at the ready? Enjoy.
(, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 21:06, Reply)
Sorry for your loss. Some great stuff there, she was clearly very talented.
(, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 22:49, Reply)
Condolences
A talented lady.
(
Thrill_My_Chinchilla is old and unimproved, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 23:16,
Reply)
A kindly tribute to her.
(
FeralCatMan Long ads need comments sections, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 23:28,
Reply)
Thanks all. Squeezed a good smattering of gags into her eulogy too. It's what she would've wanted.
(, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 23:53, Reply)
condolences mate
never easy to lose a parent, though 89 is a good innings
(
cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 0:02,
Reply)
Please accept my heartfelt condolences
(
tarka_dall Like normal dall, only a bit more spicy, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 6:56,
Reply)
:(
Mate, sorry for your loss. What a brilliantly talented person she was. Hope you're OK, and can think fondly of the good times. She clearly had a great sense of humour to go with a talent for art.
(, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 16:21, Reply)
Sorry to hear that
There's some neat stuff there
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Fadgebadger Sweaty sumo wanks for everyone!, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 17:01,
Reply)
Not Diana Rigg.
Nor, in a surprising departure from the norm around here, a rocket launched by a Bond villain.
(
Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 20:23,
Reply)
How the fuck does someone put the wrong size cars on?!
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FeralCatMan Long ads need comments sections, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 20:59,
Reply)
Someone was hungover that morning.
Give it six months and it'll appear on Fesshole.
(
Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 22:01,
Reply)
That’s a long time to wait to make up a dull lie.
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mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 22:16,
Reply)
Imagine the subsequent job reference
How will they skirt around a disaster like this utter clusterfuck.
(
FeralCatMan Long ads need comments sections, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 23:32,
Reply)
I'm not sure I'd want to be walking on that bridge
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evil_andy Stick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 21:06,
Reply)
Not as good as the 'Fenton' one IMO.
The helpless exasperation is special.
(
FeralCatMan Long ads need comments sections, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 23:22,
Reply)
Diana Rigg on Parkinson
sorry for two in a row but god she was so brilliant and gorgeous
(
fred zeppelin (Taylor's version), Thu 10 Sep 2020, 19:53,
Reply)
I've just noticed -
particularly from that first clip - how much of an echo of Rigg there is in Olivia Colman.
(
Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 20:29,
Reply)
So the gender reveal party turned out pretty weird, still not sure what it is tbh.
I made this!
(Music is outtake from Shaun Of The Dead soundtrack sessions/drugs)
(
fred zeppelin (Taylor's version), Thu 10 Sep 2020, 18:50,
Reply)
Am unable to contrive a witty subject line worthy of a B3ta post, but...
Oh my goodness. That is spectacularly excellent. Thank you for the love imbued in this work.
May all your parties be weird. Hope it was weird in a good way.
(
d0gbyte, Sat 12 Sep 2020, 13:27,
Reply)
The only woman to ever marry James Bond.
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Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 18:04,
Reply)
She was so beautiful, brilliant at acting and being funny.
p.s. Pretty sure that's one of Blofeld's country girls in OHMSS who replaces her.
(
fred zeppelin (Taylor's version), Thu 10 Sep 2020, 18:47,
Reply)
Adult Swim have cancelled The Venture Bros. Here's a petition.
I know it's not quite as important as Brexit, BLM or coronavirus, but this show really is excellent and has no business being cancelled.
(
brb man-child cuck corporate supplicant fuck, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 15:44,
Reply)
literally the best thing on adult swim also think its their longest running show too
(, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 16:44, Reply)
Supposedly AS don't want to cancel and the decision has come down from on high
(possibly VIACOM or Warner or Turner or some other executive bean counter), though I suspect they're just trying to babyface themselves to the baying mob.
(
brb man-child cuck corporate supplicant fuck, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 17:23,
Reply)
i expect netflix will pick them up like they did with arrested development
(, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 17:41, Reply)
That's no way to describe Meghan and Harry.
(
Prufrock Lucifer, son of the morning!, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 18:51,
Reply)
I’m ambivalent
I enjoyed immensely at the start but around the time they moved to New York the show started focusing too much on minor characters and I lost interest.
(
jonbob loves you, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 20:08,
Reply)
I want a Brick Frog spinoff.
(
brb man-child cuck corporate supplicant fuck, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 21:38,
Reply)
Might as well, that’s what happened to Mr Pickles
Kill the show and spin it off with the single most irritating character ever conceived.
(
jonbob loves you, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 22:48,
Reply)
SPACECATAZ!
Also The Xtacles (mo-ore than you bargained foooooooor). I actually like Momma Named Me Sheriff.
(
brb man-child cuck corporate supplicant fuck, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 0:04,
Reply)
It doesn't matter how good the show is if I can't abide the main character. I'll stop watching pretty damned quickly.
Star Trek Lower Decks seems to be going the same way.
(
jonbob loves you, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 0:43,
Reply)
What made you think from watching the trailer, that Lower Decks would be anything other than utter shite?
(
evil_andy Stick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 13:47,
Reply)
I saw the trailer and thought it looked proper shite
but so far it's the best Star Trek since ST:Enterprise (which in my opinion was the best Trek since TNG). Certainly more watchable and less insulting than the dirty backstreet abortions of Discovery and Picard.
ST:LD is a copy/amalgamation of Final Space and The Orville, but they were derived from The Incal and TNG - and I love those things. Lower Decks is fanservice/fanwank, but after all the pain and suffering since the dumb movie reboots I think Trek fans deserve some uplifting and optimistic material.
(
brb man-child cuck corporate supplicant fuck, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 15:59,
Reply)
Sailing around Holland timelapse
"Oh the boats that glide on the Zuider Zee" etc
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RompaStompa Stick it up your jumper, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 13:55,
Reply)
I regularly cycle
6:34 to 7:42 as-fast-as-I-bleeding-can in a bid to get fit.
In fact, I got stopped recently by the swinging of the blue/white bridge seen at 7:36 and took photos of the passing ships while waiting for the cycle path to be put back in position.
/blog
(, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 14:15, Reply)
Bridge at 8:37 is a new one on me.
Where'd it go again?
(
joefish It's hard for thee to kick against the pricks, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 15:48,
Reply)
Nice. I want to see the ship the camera is on though.
(
evil_andy Stick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 17:29,
Reply)
I was thinking it might be a kite
As there are two lines from the ship to the camera, but there are places where it practically stops so I'm wondering if it's a tethered drone.
(
tarka_dall Like normal dall, only a bit more spicy, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 19:37,
Reply)
Probably just the top of a mast
(
evil_andy Stick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 19:57,
Reply)
dutch text says
The images were taken with a Canon 550d 18 Mpx camera with an interval of 3 seconds. In total, nearly 30,000 photos were shot. At the time, the film was not allowed to be published immediately and - as it goes - eventually forgotten.
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TBL I posted this on, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 23:40,
Reply)
"It was a transport of 30 mtrs high. We hang at the top of it."
"We had it mounted on a ballhead which was bolted to a wooden plank. The plank was bolted to a very sturdy magnet which we hang at the steel based construction. With ducktape and tyrips we made sure it wasn't going anywhere. We shielded it from the elements with a plastic garbage bag.
We had an external battery pack and timer ripped out of an old harbotronics Timelapse Camera Package. The battery lasted longer then the 64 Gb card we used. The 50.000 photo's was when the card was full. The big challenge was the fact that we weren't able to get to the camera during the trip. So the settings had to be automatic since back in the days connecting through the internet was a lot harder."
(
Happosai _,,,,_(O ; o)_,,,, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 10:51,
Reply)
They're towing another vessel or barge of some sort with a tall mast.
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joefish It's hard for thee to kick against the pricks, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 15:00,
Reply)
Really really good, as the Dutch say.
(Dutch people are better at English than many English people I've met)
(
fred zeppelin (Taylor's version), Thu 10 Sep 2020, 18:52,
Reply)
Fuck you, I can English well good me.
(
wheresthefish Partly filled with wrong, Thu 10 Sep 2020, 20:32,
Reply)
Thems are happy candels
(
Fadgebadger Sweaty sumo wanks for everyone!, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 9:37,
Reply)
oooo that's warming me already
happy candleday
(
cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Fri 11 Sep 2020, 12:08,
Reply)
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