I can't rmember any of your names and i'd like to know which one of you is my favourite
you can all compete to be crowned king of my heart in this thread

i'm off to lunch, might read it when i get bakc. K laters
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 8 Nov 2011, 12:31, 178 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

on man I missed my b3ta birthday
Tell me how four years of me has changed your life for the better.

Alt: Suggest inventive ways for me to kill people who have started talking about Christmas
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 8 Nov 2011, 11:07, 156 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Does anyone know what happened to The Truth Fairy ?
Did she run off when it came out that they're a 'she' ?

Here's £1000, you can do what you want with it, except go towards paying any debts/bills, what you doing with it?

Incidently, I saw that "I am not going to be the man you expect me to be" old-du-toilet stuff, god, perfume adverts are the most contrived piece of shit, it really puts me off, and anyone who buys into the whole "I'm a dancer, I _love_ to dance" thing can go do one. It's not officaly christmas 'till I see some some cola trucks (or some animated polar bears).

Oh oh oh oh, the fucking littlewoods advert really fucking pisses me off. They have the kid's rap thing, the 'funky cool little dude saying "wicked"' thing, and everyone gets presents worth around £500 except for the son who gets an omptimus prime.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 8 Nov 2011, 10:59, 20 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

nah but seriously tho, someone get upset
this place is dullsville without someone wobblin
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 8 Nov 2011, 10:11, 158 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

OFF TOPIC
it is now 7:21 where you are
tell me about your pants

or plans

whatever
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 8 Nov 2011, 7:21, 223 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Fuck me, I'm scunnered tonight.
Tell me something nice.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 7 Nov 2011, 21:27, 33 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

I'm watching this "Greek for a week" thing.
This program is going to do sooo bad for Greece, after watching this, I can't see many people, especially not 'the common man', having any sort of sympathy for them, and would be quite outraged if we 'bail them out'.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 20:53, 20 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

A less SQUAWKY thread.
Although I have to admit to quite liking the SQUAWKING.

What is your route to getting drunk in a pub? Do you start a pints and then move onto the shorts, or are you a wine drinker?

Alt: Best reality television show.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 20:24, 21 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

squawk squawk SQUAWK squawk
SQUAWK squawk,SQUAWK SQUAWK SQUAWK
squawk: SQUAWK SQUAWK SQUAWK squawk squawk?

*ruffles feathers*
(bollocks parrot squawk squawk squawk, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 18:04, 127 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Well, that was shit.
So let's have the thread I posted for 2 seconds this morning,but deleted, like a gentleman, when I saw I'd be threadstopmping Nakers first shit thread of the day:

Procrastination is a terrible thing, it stops you getting round to what you should do, but you often don't enjoy whatever it is your procrastinating time filler is, because you know you should be getting on with the important stuff.

How do you procrastinate and do you actually enjoy it (we'll take this place as a a given)?

Alt: if you could get your arse in gear to get one thing done in the next week what would it be?
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 7 Nov 2011, 14:48, 219 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

New thread
something something something lunch

alt:something something something 'fucking shit'

fill in the missing words, or don't, see if i care

EDIT: just for CQ, why is CQ such a momumental bender?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 13:19, 245 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Good morning shitcunts.
When was the last time you lost your temper and why?

Former smokers - do you have any advice about quitting?
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:13, 200 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Welcome to Monday
I feel hungover, from Saturday night. This means I am getting old which sucks.

best foreign food, i'm torn between Italian and indian.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 8:06, 207 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Got anything interested planned for next week?
NATTER!
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 6 Nov 2011, 21:12, 46 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Cor Blimey, look at the personailties on THAT one.
Ok, we've done the whole "What do you go for?", in a prospective partner, thing 100s of times, and it always goes towards "nice eyes" or "nice teeth" or "a shiney coat".... But here is a slight veriation on it, personailty wise, what does it for you?

What sort of thing could you spend hours and hours in someone's company where it only feels but a moment?
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sun 6 Nov 2011, 15:28, 239 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Morning Oaties
I won my mates game of poker last night having gone heads up with an 11-1 disadvantage in chips. My last two hands were 7 2 off-suit and 5 2 suited, which I think taught my opponent a valuable lesson in letting me see a flop unopposed, since I ended up winning both hands all-in. £50 woo!

As a reward this morning I have had a sausage, black pudding and egg sandwich and am watching QI uncut.

How was your Saturday night?

Alt: What did you have for breakfast?
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Sun 6 Nov 2011, 11:37, 41 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Happy Compromise.
I went to the pub for a few hours, and then came home.

Anyone about?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 5 Nov 2011, 22:20, 23 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

So fed up of paperwork, teaching is ace, evaluating everything is balls.
If you could change one aspect of your job what would it be?

Alt: what choo up to?
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sat 5 Nov 2011, 16:49, 103 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

bleah?
alt: sdggjxhmh ghxg hfg hvhm?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 5 Nov 2011, 12:28, 21 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

I like looking through the cheese grater to see my mature lactic shavings showering down on my foodal dominion.
What do you like?
(NoeI «:::P:::» «:::E:::» «:::R:::» «:::V:::» «:::E:::», Fri 4 Nov 2011, 20:31, 47 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Does anyone
actually prefer blondes?

alt: what colour would be the best colour hair to have. I reckon deep red.

alt alt: get on with typing shit, fools
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 18:58, 223 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

It's Friday afternoon, so you'll probably all be fucking off in a minute.
But I don't care, I'm going to try my luck with a new thread anyway.

Anyone know any secret cheap websites for booking train fares? I've tried all the usual tricks, but I can't seem to get anything cheaper than the trainline.com prices.

Alt: What are you looking forward to next week?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 4 Nov 2011, 16:29, 140 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

saw a bloke in the supermarket today with his cock in a jar of mayonaise
i thought to myself 'fucken hell man'
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 15:41, 7 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Today I bought a mug as big as my head so I can have MOAR CAFFIENE in my first coffee of the day.
I'm so excited. I want it to be morning now.

If you could have a fight with another B3tan, who would it be and how would you fight?
( girlinthehole, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:34, 211 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

OK, as we clearly desperately need a new thred
Nicky Names:

I was known almost exclusively by a silly nick name for over 10 years, it was to the extent than my wife and all my family knew me as this rather than my given name and my son thought it was actually my name. Looking back this was truly retarded, but it seemed to make some kind of sense at the time.


Have you ever had a nick name (b3ta user names excluded)?

Do you know any interesting stories about nick names?


Alt: I'm going round to my sisters tomorrow to celebrate my mum's birthday and I feel like an outcast because I don't like wine and so have decided to drink something I'll actually enjoy. Either mock me for my lack of class, join me in my dislike of off-grape-juice, or say something about something that made you feel like an uncultured misfit in your own family.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 4 Nov 2011, 13:00, 228 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Elevenses
Morning all, been stuck in phone calls all morning and doing lots of w*rk. Bastards. However, I've taken delivery of a bacon and egg sandwich and a jam doughnut and pub time is calling soon.

Best day of the working week and why? Worst day and why?

Alt:
Weekend plans? Lunch? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 11:12, 128 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

ROCKY THEME PLAYS
(not eye of the tigerm, the proper one)

The other day a couple of my colleagues got themselves a set of weights and a bench and set themselves up a gym in our back office.
My PC is hooked up to speakers around the office so we can all listern to the radio, when I left that evening I put Spotify on, turned the volume up, locked my PC and turned the monitor off.

The cleaners were apparently quite surpriseed to walk into two scantily dressed men working out to the folowing soundtrack;

Y.M.C.A
GAY BAR
In the Navy
Flashdance
Had the time of my life etc you get the idea

please suggest more songs for me to put on for them and tell me of the HILARIOUS japes you get up to
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 9:30, 79 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Is it too early for a Christmasy user name?
Gonz obviously doesn't think so.

Alt: Morning! I'll post this and then probably not post any reply's as I haven't been to sleep yet and am now about to do so. Talk amongst yourselves, but keep the noise down
(wehttamman via B3ta for microwave, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 6:29, 75 replies, latest was 14 years ago)