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morning poo stabbers

(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 7:00, archived)
Why hello there

(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 7:41, archived)
General Oct-obi!

(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 8:04, archived)
pr+

(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 10:10, archived)
quit yo' jobbie-jabbin'

(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 7:53, archived)
jobbie wheeker

(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 8:05, archived)
I pity the poo

(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 12:09, archived)
ain't gettin' on no throne, sucka

(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 12:11, archived)
+ea

(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 13:57, archived)
Morning
I put some fig and walnut bread in the machine on a timer last night so had some proper artisan bread for breakfast.
(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 8:08, archived)
You can't spell 'Kenobi' without K N O B. Really makes you think, doesn't it?

(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 8:18, archived)
some sketch show when I was a kid called him "hubby wanky knobbie", which made me laugh

(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 10:10, archived)
Round my way, he's Obnib wob Kenebneb
- for some [wacky] reason
(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 12:16, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8469555
P
(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 12:30, archived)
I never stabbed you

(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 8:54, archived)
o hai mark

(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 10:11, archived)
afternoon

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 18:58, archived)
evening

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 19:01, archived)
morning

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 19:34, archived)
afternoon

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 19:52, archived)
evening

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 20:00, archived)
RIP to one of the all-time great /calendar threads

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 20:32, archived)
i forgot calendar existed

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 20:37, archived)
So did Rob

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 20:46, archived)
diankale will never be forgotten, 5eva in are harts

(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 14:47, archived)
what was it?

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 23:59, archived)
A place for b3tans to organise social events
But that’s not important right now
(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 7:26, archived)
teh b4shz0rz!!!

(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 7:53, archived)
lololololoololololol oh come ON do I look gullible

(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 11:08, archived)
Is this some kind of joke?

(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 11:17, archived)
b3ta, you mean

(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 12:55, archived)
lol no

(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 16:26, archived)
afternoon

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 20:20, archived)
mofahaning

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 20:30, archived)
SMELLY WILLIES

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 21:38, archived)
ARSEHOLE

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 22:19, archived)
Yo

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 11:41, archived)
Ho

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 11:49, archived)
You a ho, Trouser

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 11:50, archived)
I could change my ways...
but you always be U G L Y. lol.
(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 8:52, archived)
alright h

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 11:51, archived)
Bollocks

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 12:05, archived)
You fucking stupid fucking cunt

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 11:53, archived)
I'm flattered

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 12:04, archived)
words

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 12:07, archived)
To your mums

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 12:13, archived)
Terrible bullying of Queef. :(
/ac
(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 12:19, archived)
An oxymoron

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 12:23, archived)
said the hydrogen atom dismissively of the water molecule

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 13:46, archived)


(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 15:35, archived)
Might do a daily comic strip about the rivalry between hydrogen and water and post it on /board.

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 16:13, archived)
As long as you give them fur and tits

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 17:09, archived)
Dude

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 14:33, archived)
b3ta

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 17:34, archived)
morning dog botherers!

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 6:01, archived)
Hi

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 6:52, archived)
*bothers dog*
Alright.
(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 7:51, archived)
Well, I will try to get into my own bed while she's comfortably curled on top of the duvet, won't I
+ a poo, etc.
(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 8:56, archived)
Oi oi
I’m off the the blood bank in a bit to deposit some top-notch claret.
(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 10:10, archived)
people say I have the best blood, nobody's ever seen blood like this before

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 10:18, archived)
I bet Trump's blood is like Heinz ketchup.

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 11:18, archived)
It's probably about 40% actual Heinz ketchup, given his constant hamberders.

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 11:23, archived)
Little cholesterol croutons floating around in it.

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 11:52, archived)
evening

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 19:33, archived)
alright

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 19:39, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8484500
(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 19:47, archived)
MOFAHA!

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 20:52, archived)
Hi

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 20:07, archived)
hi

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 20:53, archived)
night

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 20:43, archived)
night

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 20:53, archived)
evening morning

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 20:56, archived)
Too far mate.

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 21:31, archived)
Not nearly far enough

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 22:43, archived)
horrible evening

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 22:52, archived)
Isn't it just

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 23:02, archived)
Mr. Tea

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 13:34, archived)
Smash Monkey

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 13:38, archived)
Smash Monkey!

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 14:08, archived)
mofaha!

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 14:26, archived)
garold!

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 14:27, archived)
mr horrible!

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 14:36, archived)
MiseryCunt!

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 15:59, archived)
wut

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 18:37, archived)
Cheers!

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 18:46, archived)
mofaha!

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 19:48, archived)
garold!

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 20:57, archived)
Cheers

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 13:51, archived)
Cheers!

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 14:09, archived)
Garold! No, wait, I've fucked that up.

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 14:26, archived)
garold! no it's fine

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 14:36, archived)
Mr. Tea!

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 14:08, archived)
arseboon dilbaro

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 14:22, archived)
morning

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 14:27, archived)
semen khaidenko

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 14:28, archived)
Hi-vis Warlock

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 18:15, archived)

rl zz
(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 18:36, archived)
Conspicuous druid

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 20:46, archived)
Bou
The real Bou, the whole Bou and nothing but the Bou
(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 9:18, archived)
Cheers

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 12:12, archived)
Cheers Cheers

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 12:23, archived)
Cheers

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 12:29, archived)
Cheers

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 12:28, archived)
Cheers

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 12:29, archived)
afternoon

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 12:31, archived)
afternoon morning

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 12:35, archived)
it's still my morning morning but afternoon

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 12:41, archived)
morning

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 5:59, archived)
morning morning

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 6:14, archived)
morning morning

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 6:58, archived)
morning morning

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 7:04, archived)
morning morning

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 7:08, archived)
morning morning

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 7:40, archived)
Cheers, Cheers

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 8:01, archived)
tea tea
No sorry that doesn't work
(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 8:10, archived)
:(

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 8:21, archived)
Mr. Mr.
Take these broken wings
And learn to fly again
Learn to live so free
(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 9:14, archived)
tea tea eff enn

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 8:27, archived)
Audi+

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 10:00, archived)

two tea, or not two tea
that's the question
(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 10:34, archived)
^two tea fruity

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 11:53, archived)
Morning

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 8:48, archived)
Morning

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 8:55, archived)
morning morning

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 9:47, archived)
GEOSTORM morning

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 10:25, archived)
morning morning

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 12:23, archived)
Alright

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 22:16, archived)
Yes alright thanks, you?
I may not reply because I'm going to bed now, please do not mistake my absence for disdain.
(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 22:23, archived)
alright

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 23:22, archived)
We bought two bottles of €6 whiskey in Spain
It is fucking disgusting. Really shudder-inducing stuff. It’s about drinkable with ginger beer, but only just. What should I mix it with to make it more palatable?
(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 17:52, archived)
Jenkem

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 17:54, archived)
It would improve it, yes

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 17:57, archived)
chuckem!

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 0:07, archived)
€7 whiskey

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 17:55, archived)
Hmmm
Makes sense…
(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 17:57, archived)
Turtle power!

(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 8:15, archived)
Idk, prolly spunk or w/e, lol.

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 18:02, archived)
lol!

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 18:51, archived)
or w/e w/e

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 19:13, archived)
50/50 with maple syrup
let it mix properly for a day or so
(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 18:13, archived)
Hmmmmmm……
Tempting but the maple syrup would cost more than the booze. I’ll try golden syrup as I’ve got some of that in the cupboard…
(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 18:51, archived)
spunk €6 on a shit drink
then cheap out on fixing the problem

fuckwit
(, Tue 1 Sep 2026, 11:28, archived)
Pure orange juice and tonic water

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 19:08, archived)
put peeled slivers of fresh ginger root and sugar/syrup in the bottle, will taste better immediately but keep the ginger in the bottle and shake it every day, it will improve

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 19:12, archived)
alt: coca cola as a mixer pretty much hides the taste but it's gross anyway

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 19:15, archived)
g+

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 19:36, archived)
then it will all taste the same

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 23:25, archived)

Just pour it away. For the sake of €12 why suffer
(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 20:10, archived)
Naah
It’s a challenge
(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 20:29, archived)
If you want a challenge
Mix it with tomato juice and Bovril
(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 21:00, archived)
A Bloody Awful Mary

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 21:10, archived)
he prefers to be called garold

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 21:19, archived)
actual lol

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 21:24, archived)
He can always mix it with everclear and 20/20

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 21:28, archived)
👍🏻

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 23:23, archived)
🤣🤣🤣

(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 9:15, archived)
Pepsicola

(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 9:17, archived)
Morning
Am at the gym. I miss my party days…
(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 6:50, archived)
Morningggg

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 7:11, archived)

Hello. 6k rowed. Time for push-ups and sit-ups. Bleurgh…
(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 7:26, archived)
Less texting, more lifting

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 7:54, archived)
HnnnnnnNNNNNNNNGHHHhhhhnnnn!!!!
*pop*
(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 8:53, archived)
+o

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 11:59, archived)
+l

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 12:24, archived)
Call that push up?! It looks more like you're trying to fuck the floor!
- oh, right. Sorry. I'll, um, leave you to it.
(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 8:27, archived)
His name is Mat

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 8:52, archived)
'At the Jim', eh?

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 10:51, archived)
6k!!! Bloody hell

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 11:08, archived)
I once did 25 km in two hours, with only a piss break halfway through.
On maximum resistance.

That was quite a long time ago, though.
(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 12:26, archived)
Since all rowing courses are 2km long, you've overshot by some distance and ended up in a shopping centre.

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 11:15, archived)
In the central fountain presumably, going round and round

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 12:04, archived)
I think one oar is shorter than the other
or else the rowlocks (rollocks?) are fautly.
(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 12:48, archived)
Scooby destined never to father a puppy :(

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 13:01, archived)
He'

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 15:01, archived)
Carnival for me today
Going to get wankered and stuff my face
(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 10:40, archived)

C r iv
(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 11:05, archived)
Jings, ens, help ma boab

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 11:13, archived)
alt: not for cutaneous, rectal or intravenous administration

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 15:28, archived)
Fuck that
Party on, dude
(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 15:02, archived)
Mike DYERS
Dana CARKEY
(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 15:05, archived)
Party for one at the gym
Just say the poppers are steroids and I'm sure you'll get away with it
(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 15:08, archived)
It’s not the same.

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 18:52, archived)
pushing morning down the board
alt: evening
(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 18:20, archived)
bollocks

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 18:55, archived)
Scott,

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 19:41, archived)
afternoon

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 19:07, archived)
yo

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 19:42, archived)
evening

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 19:25, archived)
smeg

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 19:42, archived)
Evening

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 19:31, archived)
‘sup

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 19:42, archived)
I'm very tired

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 19:55, archived)
Same

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 20:46, archived)
WHY CAN I STILL NOT FUCKING SLEEP!?

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 3:23, archived)
BH tomorrow!
I expect I'll squander it like all my other days off
(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 20:44, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8484389
(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 20:46, archived)
+ &
Good to see doctors are still smoking
(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 20:58, archived)
Additionally, a large unique play area is found in the park and includes:
a gentle dinosaur
two concrete dolphins
three beautiful dinosaur eggs
three playful seals
a tire swing
tot swing, and
The USS IMAGINATION
(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 2:18, archived)
And a partridge in a pear tree

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 3:24, archived)
Here's a list of my ailments
I have obstructive sleep apnea
I have non-alcoholic fatty liver disease
I have insulin resistance and metabolic syndrome
I have bipolar depression
I have temporal lobe epilepsy
I have high blood pressure
I have super high bad cholesterol
I am exceptionally sedentary
I am obese
I am 57
I put this all into AI and asked for a prognosis
It said if I don't do something about all this I'll be dead by 70
I said "what can I do to speed it up?" 🤣😂🤣
(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 16:22, archived)
Keep getting medical advice from AI
That ought to speed it up.
(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 16:43, archived)
I think it's right in this case

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 16:51, archived)

OK you should be taking statins, moderate exercise, ideally lose weight if possible. Daily oats, porridge probably. No alcohol ever (yes I know it's boring). Find a helpful range of self-soothing and calming stuff that works for you and helps you ride out the Big Feelings as and when they surge through, tidally. Find a way to connect to something outside yourself that grounds you and makes you feel part of something bigger. Grow plants. Even one small pot of something. Get an animal or spend as much time as you can with or near animals. Find five things a week in your home that you can recycle, bin, or give away. Lay down on the ground at least once a week, ideally outside, and pretend you're growing roots into the earth beneath you. Don't do this anywhere you might get 1.) stepped on, or; 2.) run over. Find out what and who makes you feel valued and thin out what and who doesn't. Consider self-compassion. Consider it again but this time without taking the piss. As often as possible, remind yourself of a time you felt happy, safe, and calm, and imagine all the details of it. How it looked, how it smelt. How it sounded. How it made you feel. Find ways to let go of caring about stuff that doesn't really matter. And revisit being kind to yourself. Or, you know, don't do any of that shit, fuck it
(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 17:05, archived)
But trust me on the sunscreen

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 17:07, archived)

OK you should be taking statins, moderate exercise, ideally lose weight if possible. Daily oats, porridge probably. No alcohol ever (yes I know it's boring). Find a helpful range of self-soothing and calming stuff that works for you and helps you ride out the Big Feelings as and when they surge through, tidally. Find a way to connect to something outside yourself that grounds you and makes you feel part of something bigger. Grow plants. Even one small pot of something. Get an animal or spend as much time as you can with or near animals. Find five things a week in your home that you can recycle, bin, or give away.

Don't
1.) stepped on, or; 2.)

Find out what and who makes you feel valued and thin out what and who doesn't. Consider self-compassion. Consider it again but this time without taking the piss. As often as possible, remind yourself of a time you felt happy, safe, and calm, and imagine all the details of it. How it looked, how it smelt. How it sounded. How it made you feel. Find ways to let go of caring about stuff that doesn't really matter. And revisit being kind to yourself. Or, you know, don't do any of that shit, fuck it
(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 17:13, archived)
pfffff YOU ROTTER

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 19:01, archived)
Hark at you with your sensible, useful advice on /talk.

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 17:20, archived)
awful isn't it

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 19:01, archived)
Thank you 😭
I did have a dog.
We had to put him down last Saturday
He was really old and ill and suffering
I'm a bit scared of statins but I'm willing to do all the other stuff
Thanks for the kind advice
(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 18:09, archived)

I'm extremely sorry about your dog, matey :(
(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 19:00, archived)
Thanks vladimir ❤️
Appreciate it
Have decided no more pets so it was particularly hard to lose him
(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 6:28, archived)
Ohhhhh that's tough and a tough choice :(

(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 7:13, archived)
I know, heartbreaking
Even if I wanted to my sister won't
(, Thu 3 Sep 2026, 9:14, archived)
Ignore him, I'M the official chat GPT.
Now I suggest you submit an online appointment request and we can have a brief chat about your health in around 3 months time
(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 20:43, archived)
lol :)

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 23:13, archived)
3 MONTHS????!!!!!!!
😫
(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 6:35, archived)
try turning yourself off
Then not back on again
(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 17:11, archived)
Don't know how, mate

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 18:09, archived)
sorry i feel bad for saying that

(, Wed 2 Sep 2026, 21:10, archived)
Sounds fucking awful
I’m not sure I have much to add to what others have said other than Mounjaro is brilliant (I’ve had great results as have a lot of my friend and family) and losing weight could help with a lot of your issues. Hope you get on top of some of those problems.
(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 21:13, archived)
Thank you garold ❤️
I will check Mounjaro out. Thanks
(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 6:32, archived)
morning

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 1:38, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8484337
(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 2:30, archived)
indeed

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 6:03, archived)
Morning

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 6:09, archived)
still up from last night?

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 8:44, archived)
too many little blue pills 💙

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 10:49, archived)
I was, yes
Got to sleep about 7.30, woke up at 11, shower, coffee, quick bite, then off to the cinema to watch toy story 5. After that, we went to the pub for a roast and back to the cinema to watch coyote Vs acme
(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 19:30, archived)
morning

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 8:44, archived)
Hello
I’m off for a jolly walk to Greenwich for breakfast.
(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 9:22, archived)
-o
+e
(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 10:49, archived)
christ garold I'm sorry I don't have the energy for the strikey-g, hope you had a great time

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 13:54, archived)
Ok so we can all just pretend that you posted strikeout l replace with n and then we could reply "what's a jonny walk?" and we'd all have a right laugh about it

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 14:05, archived)
then I suppose someone (NOT me) says good one mm

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 16:45, archived)
and Trigger does a face

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 18:19, archived)
Yeah well you would say that.

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 10:36, archived)
because of their name, right?!

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 10:50, archived)
Who said that?

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 11:10, archived)
Certainly not the Obvious Sorcerer
- he's a right twat
(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 12:47, archived)
Evening
I'm coming back from my "holiday" tomorrow, so I'll be getting absolutely fucked up with my niece tonight, who's in on the whole thing. What are you smeggy cunts up to?
(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 18:16, archived)
How do you get to Carnegie hall? Just answering your question.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_philanthropists
(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 18:51, archived)
Zerbanoo Gifford, last name on the list, image how embarassed she must be, she finally made the list but she's LAST

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 20:22, archived)
ZZ Top were cropped off the bottom, ironically

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 21:50, archived)
*something about a close shave*

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 0:12, archived)
Hold on, is it possible that's actually Zerbanoo Zerbanoo "Top" Gifford

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 0:16, archived)
Bus

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 21:06, archived)
To answer your question seriously
If you're talking about Dolly, she's spent millions on improving childhood literacy, donated a million to COVID research and given $1,000 a month to families who lost their homes through wildfires. Not to mention greenlighting Buffy.
(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 21:11, archived)
Pales into insignificance next to George Soros and Bill Gates

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 21:30, archived)
Fuck off

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 21:36, archived)
What's wrong with facts?
Nobody's denying that Dolly Parton did good charitable work but to claim that she's one of the greatest ever philanthropists is just cuckoo.
(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 21:39, archived)
Well stick me in a fucking clock

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 21:44, archived)
Why is "holiday" in inverted commas?
I'm drunk from beer
I never drink so two beers makes me drunk
I have fatty liver disease so I shouldn't be drinking at all
(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 16:03, archived)
well stop it

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 17:40, archived)
I've had two beers
That will be me til Christmas
(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 18:18, archived)
Because I didn't actually go anywhere
Although the vast majority of my family and everyone at work thinks I did
(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 21:14, archived)
Ah!
Make some AI photos of yourself with some hot Spanish guy in Mallorca🤣😂
(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 6:41, archived)
Morning.
Alt.: favourite non-main-sequence star? I'd have to say Eta Carinae.
(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 7:51, archived)
Currently thought to be the only star to emit natural laser light,
which is cool.
(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 8:03, archived)
Yeah, it's pretty badass.
Any other suggestions, though?
(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 8:48, archived)
I like a bit of HOPS 383 in the morning.

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 9:35, archived)
Ooh, nice choice.

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 10:03, archived)
Fuck off, I liked HOPS 383 before any of you cunts had even heard of it

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 12:14, archived)
I MEANT I LOOKED IT UP AND IT SEEMED AWESOME
WHY ARE YOU BEING SO AGGRESSIVE :((((
(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 12:17, archived)
Sorry can't hear you above the sound of my enormous telescope

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 12:24, archived)

my being an
tele
+r
(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 12:25, archived)
If you can tell me which "scoper" you meant (the social app, the R package, the PHP tool, or something else), I can give you more detailed instructions or help!

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 15:27, archived)
You’d have to?
Why, does it have a gun to your head?
(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 9:08, archived)
Yes.

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 10:03, archived)
Objects like T Tauri are still gathering mass and contracting before nuclear fusion starts, give them a fucking chance eh

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 10:53, archived)

T Tauri my mum
(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 11:46, archived)
morning
Conversations a bit more intelectual this morning. I had no idea there were quite a few astonomy fans on /talk.
(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 11:08, archived)
we're rehearsing the heat death of the universe

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 12:49, archived)
Don't talk to me until you've named your favourite synapsid SMH

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 11:09, archived)
prolly Elton John

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 11:21, archived)
Solid choice.

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 11:46, archived)
You expect me to choose?
The light from some stars can take so long to reach earth that they may already have died before you see them
(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 11:29, archived)
Dunno.
Anyone able to explain to me how this works?

a.aliexpress.com/_Ev4mxSK
(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 11:36, archived)
I mean, if it's one size fits all then why do they offer a range of sizes?

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 11:39, archived)
adapting to them takes 3 to 5 days, but once we adapt, we never leave them off, they are SEASONAL
"I bought them for my mom, but she wears the same size as me"
(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 12:09, archived)
you mate. you're my fav.

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 12:33, archived)
Awwww. ^o^

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 12:37, archived)
Morning!
Last weekend in Canada before going back to Europe, so looking forward to having a nice fun time.

Anyone doing something fun this weekend?
(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 13:58, archived)
Wife went to see Bon Jovi with her pal last night,
so I watched 28 Years Later: The Bone Temple with her mum's dog. My dog had retired to bed by that point.
(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 16:34, archived)
What did you think?
I went in not expecting much but was pleasantly surprised.
(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 17:31, archived)
I thought it was brutal, but really good.
Fiennes and O'Connell gave excellent performances.
(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 21:16, archived)
As did Lewis-Parry, who was the unexpected heart of the film

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 22:25, archived)
I saw that bon jovi doc a year or two ago
he was talking about some voice issues and rehabilitation, how to get back to his top level, was a very interesting show!
(, Mon 31 Aug 2026, 15:07, archived)
Zerbanoo

(, Sun 30 Aug 2026, 0:16, archived)
Would you dunk a smeggy dildo in the penis beaker? We need to know.

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 22:06, archived)
meep

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 22:17, archived)


(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 22:34, archived)
No m8.

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 22:37, archived)
I'll be stirring my brandy with a nail, boys

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 23:26, archived)
You got to get behind the mule in the morning and plow

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 23:39, archived)
It's a lovely sentiment but they'll not let me get behind them any more

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 23:50, archived)

youtu.be/B2v-AkSj260?is=7yGpAUv8nQ_X1QsN
(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 0:49, archived)
I'VE GOT SOMETHING TO PUT IN YOU

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 1:01, archived)
I've got a lotta bitches to plow so you can fucka me later or you can fucka me now

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 1:09, archived)
I got about 99 billion bitches but a plow ain't one

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 1:27, archived)
Jimmy?

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 1:01, archived)
fuck off back to mumsnet

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 1:00, archived)
Correct answer

(, Sat 29 Aug 2026, 1:10, archived)
A skin of four out of seven - and I knew three of the ones I got right
www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cx2z4np5pnyo
(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 13:06, archived)
5/7 J/K

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 13:22, archived)
3/7 Stu Francis smeggy dildo scene NSFW

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 13:23, archived)

Francis had numerous catchphrases on Crackerjack, mostly based on his prolific "Ooh! I could crush a grape!!".
Other variations included: "I could pummel a peach" and "I could rip a tissue".
(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 18:44, archived)
+nal

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 18:44, archived)
tissuenal

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 21:47, archived)
bless you!

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 23:29, archived)
4/7 smeggy bread

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 13:25, archived)
4/7 might try again later

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 13:52, archived)
4/7 gnome with a smeggy dildo

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 16:42, archived)
3/7 it definitely got more difficult the second time

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 16:58, archived)
fucking 1/7 piss in my hair

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 14:16, archived)
No More Bad Hair Days with NEW Piss In My Hair™

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 17:01, archived)
You've got hair?
I must have misremembered you.
(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 19:18, archived)
Pubes are hairs

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 21:57, archived)
2/7 getting your foreskin stuck between your own teeth

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 14:46, archived)
We've all done it.

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 19:06, archived)
The penile frenulum would make an excellent flossing tool.

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 19:20, archived)
I've got a brand new penile frenulum, and I'll give you the key

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 19:31, archived)
*twangs*
It's G#
(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 19:50, archived)
I haven't

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 21:58, archived)
2/7, belming spasmo.
/ac
(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 15:25, archived)
morning

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 5:53, archived)
morning morning
alt: morning
(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 5:56, archived)
It’s Friday, thank Attenborough.

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 6:46, archived)
Grave-id Attenborough

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 7:00, archived)
Death on Earth

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 7:00, archived)
I know he's the gold standard national treasure and all that, but he's a creepy old man isn't he

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 7:39, archived)
Not to my knowledge, but then I’ve never been in a dark room with him all slathered up with oil while Barry White records are playing.

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 7:40, archived)
He was on the Graham Norton show years ago alongside Cameron Diaz
and it was... uncomfortable.
(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 7:43, archived)
I was on TV with him once
He seemed ok in the green room afterwards, but then there were more interesting people than me on that program that night
(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 7:56, archived)
OH my goodness
Just absolutely rabbitholed into this extraordinary life story
Tyvm
(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 14:12, archived)
Did he crack on to Graham Norton or something?

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 9:11, archived)
That was me m8

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 9:21, archived)
Mistook him for a hylobatidae

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 9:23, archived)
disgusting

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 17:07, archived)
Morns

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 8:27, archived)
Afternoon

(, Fri 28 Aug 2026, 12:00, archived)
Optimus sub-Prime

(, Thu 27 Aug 2026, 16:44, archived)
Peter Culled

(, Thu 27 Aug 2026, 16:45, archived)
TransFORMER
etc
(, Thu 27 Aug 2026, 16:47, archived)
No change there, then

(, Thu 27 Aug 2026, 16:58, archived)
/links is over there ---------->

(, Thu 27 Aug 2026, 18:41, archived)
eww no thanks

(, Thu 27 Aug 2026, 18:47, archived)
Actually quite sad about that, even though I was always into the UK comics and thought the cartoons were pish.
And the Michael Bay abominations were much worse. And he wasn't even in my top 10. Still, what a voice.
(, Thu 27 Aug 2026, 17:27, archived)
Sorry, I mean sub-Optimus past-his-Prime

(, Thu 27 Aug 2026, 17:28, archived)
That’s the spirit!

(, Thu 27 Aug 2026, 17:29, archived)
We’re losing some good ones this year :(

(, Thu 27 Aug 2026, 17:28, archived)
At least we still have The Donald, please God don't take him too late.
Soon. I meant soon.
(, Thu 27 Aug 2026, 17:32, archived)
If god exists, he won't be the one to take that shit-soaked orange cancer on humanity

(, Thu 27 Aug 2026, 19:56, archived)
Fuck off back to mumsnet

(, Thu 27 Aug 2026, 18:37, archived)
I got banned for posting scat porn

(, Thu 27 Aug 2026, 18:46, archived)
Harsh

(, Thu 27 Aug 2026, 19:02, archived)
Ah mumsnet, home of the penis beaker.
Obligatory mumsnet /talk
(, Thu 27 Aug 2026, 19:08, archived)
Alright gnostic yeti

(, Thu 27 Aug 2026, 19:11, archived)
Γνῶθι σεαυτόν

(, Thu 27 Aug 2026, 19:20, archived)
🖤

(, Thu 27 Aug 2026, 20:30, archived)
Iron hide also dead :-(

(, Thu 27 Aug 2026, 19:57, archived)
Such heroic nonsense

(, Thu 27 Aug 2026, 20:02, archived)
Raymond Burr died in 1993 m8

(, Thu 27 Aug 2026, 21:56, archived)
In Generation 1 continuity, his distinct weapon is a liquid gun capable of generating and firing various substances, all over ur nan's tits

(, Thu 27 Aug 2026, 23:14, archived)
Iced-T

(, Thu 27 Aug 2026, 20:50, archived)
Mos Ded

(, Thu 27 Aug 2026, 21:03, archived)

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