What are you up to this afternoon?
I'm watching the football, drinking tea and trying not to eat any more milk chocolate truffles.

AltQ: Almunia would have been sent off if it wasn't Arsenal at the Emirates and if the referee had any balls. Discuss.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Sat 25 Sep 2010, 16:00, 26 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I just did a rant on the internet, it's not really a funny one, but I'll spam it out anyway for a generic saturday thread.
blog.90nz0.com/2010/09/25/jamie%E2%80%99s-american-revolution-americanwestern-food/
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 25 Sep 2010, 9:47, 15 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

'bellend' is a verb as well as a noun. Discuss.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 19:38, 17 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Pathetic thread time!
So, who's spending the weekend in front of the computer working! yay! Who's gonna be joining me pressing F5 on O/T?

Should I get chips, now? I'm hungry.
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 18:05, 144 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Here's one of my favourite tunes to get you started for the weekend:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=7_HiQomh_Zo

Question: how fucking excellent is THAT?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 16:48, 46 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Silly Joke Thread!
What's the difference between a Kangeroo and a Kangeroot?

One's a Marsupial, the other's a Geordie stuck in a lift.

Your turn.

Alt Q: "I'm getting drunk tonight, fuck you." What were the last words you said to your boss?
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 14:23, 148 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I've just cocked up some important emails
And spent the last half hour grovelling to a couple of very disgruntled writers. Bugger.


What have you cocked up recently?

Y/M not applicable.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 13:18, 118 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Moyles update (skip this if you're getting bored of this)
New article on Yahoo: new.uk.music.yahoo.com/blogs/behind_the_music/25894/web-turns-on-skint-moyles

Another Guardian article: www.guardian.co.uk/media/mediamonkeyblog/2010/sep/24/chris-moyles-charity-single

Someone (not me) has also updated Moyles's Wikipedia page:
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chris_Moyles#Pay_controversies

Thanks to Gonz & Bobby for their help - we are still getting great coverage for the charity and raising a (modest) amount of money. We will have sales numbers from iTunes at some point next week.
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 13:11, 3 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Mickey Mousers
I do not like Scousers. I do not like their accent and I do not like their self pitying ways. I also do not like their happy go lucky attitude. I think they're annoying twats. But a lad from the Wirral, Ben, moved into the flat above me on Monday and he's class. A very nice chap indeed. So I think I've changed my mind.

When did you last change your mind about something you've been staunch about?
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 12:35, 114 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Fuck you Monty, I hope your weekend lunch eats your daughter
Is it wrong to kill someone for using a fucking jackhammer outside your office window without even having the decency to let me know in advance so I could arrange not to be here?

Fucking stupid hi-vis wearing cunts.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 11:01, 155 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Weekend lunch?


There's a Jimi Hendrix documentary on BBC4 at 10pm tonight. Just saying, like.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 10:55, 35 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Hey look I'm starting a new thread.
It's like I'm a real member of the board.

This thread is a historical predictions thread.
What do you think will happen by this time next year. It must be something that can be proven and if we look back next year* we can all lol at how right/wrong we were.

*like anyone will bother
(PsychoChomp, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 10:16, 209 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Update on the Moyles donation page
We’ve now had a total of 18 donations totalling approximately £125 (including gift aid) and The Sun newspaper has mentioned the donation page today (towards the end of the article):

www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/showbiz/bizarre/3150594/Moyles-Im-not-a-great-morning-person.html

I spoke last night to Jake Yapp who created the song parody. We are in the process of getting it listed on iTunes and Amazon which will take a few days. All proceeds from this will also go to the charity.

One downside of all this is that I am going to have to listen to Moyles’s show this morning to see if he makes any comment about any of this. What are you going to do this morning that you’d rather not?

EDIT: if you search for "Jake Yapp" on iTunes you can purchase the song, however the click through to the song's page isn't live yet. Moyles has mentioned the whole saga and media coverage on air this morning, but hasn't mentioned the donations page or the song. I will be contacting his agent again this morning. I think the song will be the main story today.

SECOND EDIT: 6Music are covering the song & donation page on their show this morning. There is an online rumour that Christian O'Connell (Absolute Radio breakfast show) has tried to call Moyles live on air this morning about it - I haven't been able to verify this.

THIRD EDIT: pulled a quick website together: feedchrismoyles.com

FOURTH EDIT: Song now available to purchase on iTunes: itunes.apple.com/gb/album/do-they-know-its-chris-moyles/id394810594 All proceeds to charity
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Fri 24 Sep 2010, 6:31, 150 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

What would you rather be able to do?
Fly, but only a maximum of 3 metres above the ground

OR

Be able to jump 100 metres high, but only perfectly vertically
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 22:59, 18 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

My team didn't win.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 18:55, 61 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Traffic update!
Lane closure on the M25 anti-clockwise at the M4. Tailbacks are immense.

So I'm going to be sitting here all evening, what are you up to?

Further update! Tailbacks on the A3, just past M25 sliproad southbound. It's Carmageddon!
( Kroney, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 18:34, 8 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Oh fuck what have I done?
This morning, I was using one of my Twitter accounts and it led to some banter with a couple of people about Chris Moyles following all the press coverage about him not getting paid. As a joke I set up a donation page in his name: www.justgiving.com/Christopher-Moyles with any donations going to charity.

It has started to go viral on Twitter and I am not sure what to do! 3 donations have been made so far, it is getting retweeted alot and I have just had a media enquiry.

I have found details of Moyles's agent online and emailed them to let them know.

What else should I do? I wasn't expecting this level of reaction!

EDIT: it has now made the Guardian: www.guardian.co.uk/media/mediamonkeyblog/2010/sep/23/chris-moyles-radio-1

SECOND EDIT: Someone (unrelated to all this) has done a Chris Moyles charity record to raise money for him: www.youtube.com/watch?v=ySSreHakHFE

THIRD EDIT: In case you miss this link below Bobby has created a FB page to accompany all of this: www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=155267437827706
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 14:58, 248 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Brilliant.
I just went to the bookies to pick up a coupon for my football selections this weekend.

Whilst in Corals, I stuck a fiver on Whipperway running in the 2.10 at Fontwell.

I've just checked and it came home first at 16/1. I need to go back to the bookies now to claim my winnings!

This makes my 'special day' even more special. I never bet on the horses usually.

Q: What was the last bet you made and did it win?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 14:35, 83 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Right my geeky friends.
My boss is trying to get me to get another computer just for internet use which would mean I couldn't faff about on here all day as it would be placed near the window in my office where he can see me. Because I have the business software, (sage), on the same computer as the internet he is adamant that some hacker can get into it and steal all our details and money etc. We have a password to get into the sage software and Kaspersky security but I need an arguement to put to him that he's worrying about nothing.

Help.
( girlinthehole, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:55, 89 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Oh Al, for shame :(

Enticing them in with icecreams now. Sadtimes.
( thealternativefact, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:29, 20 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

We obviously need a new thread
Following on from Monty's "ask me anything" thread a while back, I propose The B3ta Inquisition - ask a question of any B3tan in the hope that they may dignify it with an honest/amusing response. This is basically because I don't flatter myself that any of you find me sufficiently interesting to base such a thread entirely on myself.

Alt Q, in case this is as terrible an idea as I'm gradually starting to suspect it might be - What luxury item is always your undoing come payday, the reason why there's month left at the end of the money? Mine's beer.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:31, 253 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

JOB INTERVIEW !
Yesterday I spammed out my CV to The Gardian job site, and I've already had 3 calls. And I have an interview today at an agency that looks really fun to work with.

OH MAN ! I don't know if I'm being a mug but they all said words along the lines of me being impressive; and the disability thing is actually an advantage.

They said my cab software is a most impressive show of skill sets, and that I tick so many boxes.

Only problem is, I can't think of who to use as referances.

Anyway, enough about me... How's your ego doing todaY?
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 11:38, 32 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I'm on b3ta in a lecture on my phone.
My degree is essentially fucked. I have internet in my house now as well, just in time for the new season of supernatural :D I didn't miss the internet half as much as I thought I would, apart from maybe this place every now and then. Did you miss me?

Also: HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR LAMPITOOOOO, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOUUUU.

Alt q: What's the most inappropriate urge you've had recently? My friend cycled past me on the way to Uni today and i really wanted to jump out and push him over.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 11:10, 44 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

A very happy unbirthday to everyone else!
Let's talk about what people aredoing at the weekend!

Or if you are a miserable old cunt (OH HAI MONTY!) you can discuss embarrasing moments, happiest moments, the last time you had RAGE, lunch - wait no, no not lunch SHHH no one cares about our sandwiches, or I dunno... people never stick to the question anyways.

Anything exciting happening in the arse end of the year? I have the good food show in November WOOOT. Seeing Gordon Ramsey, are celebrity chefs over rated? Do you like cooking? Are you Gonz?
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 11:05, 70 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

It's Lampito's Birthday today
Today she leaves the immature world of the teenager and joins the refined grown up world of people in their twenties. Today she stops having anonymous sex with strangers on bins outside skanky nightclubs, and instead makes love with friends she hasn't met yet on waste receptacles outside trendy wine bars.

What was the best or worst birthday present you've ever received?
(Bazongaloid, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 9:09, 235 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

where is everybody today?
it feels like you're all at a party somewhere else and nobody invited me. are you all still in bed?

alt question: i have a BD meeting shortly where i have to be sparky and proactive, despite feeling like a grey dishcloth after a late night at work, and come up with client entertainment ideas. what do you think is a good thing to do with clients? alt q: if you are lucky enough not to have to do this sort of client entertaining, are themed parties a good or a shit idea and what's the best one you've been to?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 8:24, 64 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Can we have a new thread?
That one below was getting congested.

What have you got to look forward to over the next 7 days?

Alt Q: Best tv double act ever.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 22 Sep 2010, 22:22, 54 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I'm off to the pub quiz tonight.
Anyone care to join me?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 22 Sep 2010, 20:14, 154 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I'm back
my internet is reconnected. Living without it is like loosing a limb. has anyone else gone interweb cold turkey?
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Wed 22 Sep 2010, 17:54, 15 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Apparently the most commonly stolen car in the US in 2010 is a 1994 Honda Accord.
content.usatoday.com/communities/driveon/post/2010/09/honda-accord-civic-top-list-of-most-stolen-cars/1

This must be caused by our rising murder rate. What else can a supermodel dating macho guy out for revenge use as an appropriate murder weapon?
(MichaelS wasn't picked again, Wed 22 Sep 2010, 16:20, 118 replies, latest was 15 years ago)