b3ta.com board

Home » Messageboard » Archive 37335 (Older | Newer)

sorry it's rubbish, but I have fucked many runcorn bitches....

(JoePesky, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:05, archived)

I would punch the left one in the face, and fuck the other four.

I'd probably break the rightmost one in half, though.

(

AgentMuu hentai coordination, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:11, archived)

I would fuck them all

and leave a note saying "pissy pissy"

(JoePesky, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:16, archived)

Oh.

I've never had the pleasure of even speaking to one of the delightful young women from Runcorn, but, based on the photographic evidence, they're lovely.

Do you have any advice for me?

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:16, archived)

I have advice, it goes as follows....

they are all "wooly back" pretending to be "scouse" - talk like a scouser and you are in my son

(JoePesky, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:19, archived)

Oh, lovely.

Would one of these delighful young ladies think me rude if I were to fucking grab her and smash her back doors in?
Or is that merely par for the course?

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:29, archived)

i believe it's poor etiquette not to

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:32, archived)

it's textbook

follow the rules, glee will follow, unless you are a spaz

(JoePesky, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:35, archived)

that formula pretty much applies to any situation

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:37, archived)

especially making a turd

a polished one is a winner....

(JoePesky, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:38, archived)

MAKE ME A TURD

don't worry, everyone is thinking it

(JoePesky, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:43, archived)

www.b3ta.com/board/9746150

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:52, archived)

haha

winnar

(JoePesky, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:56, archived)

Ah, shit. Bit of a problem there.

I actually am a spaz. Not in a "Haha" way, but in an actual way. Walking stick etc. Still, I'd be delighted to be introduced to these delightful Runcorn women.

Then again, I'd also be delighted to continue to toss meself off at catalogue models. So it goes.

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:45, archived)

OMG Cheryl Cole X FAAAAAAAACterrrrrrr

wank away

(JoePesky, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:49, archived)

also

wanker

(JoePesky, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:51, archived)

plus 3 pumps

(JoePesky, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:59, archived)

spaz

(JoePesky, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 4:14, archived)

give me a number 3 with extra sides

(JoePesky, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 4:16, archived)

I think Cheryl is damn cute.

(

Ttssattsr, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 4:42, archived)

she's a racist whore

i'd like to punch her in the face and call her a fucking bitch.

(Cakie Rose from the dead on, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 10:15, archived)

ngngngh

ok, how do i get around the forums fps limit on animatied gifs? ive browsed through "save for web devices" but cant find a way. also feel free to speed it up for me.

(Rattlehead all time with the gay, forever touching, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:53, archived)

None of the browsers respect the GIF frame rates.

Each has their own way of doing it, alas. Try 0.02 seconds
for really flippy ones. Zero is often ignored and the browser
uses a default value. Often 10 or 15 frames per sec.

edit: Here it is at 0.02

Edit in mine and I'll edit this away. Or not, your call.

(

Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:57, archived)

0.07

is the fastest framespeed that works for all of the currently most popular browsers, I think. I'm including IE6 in that list because it's still in fairly wide use.

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:59, archived)

I assume you are speaking of Windows. On Mac OSX it is even stranger.

Firefox and Opera will do 0.02 but ignore fractions
on whole units 1.2 = 1.0 and so on. Safari does its
own thing and ignores anything under 0.1 on some
machines and video cards. We need a scorecard!

(

Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:03, archived)

Yeah I guess I have a web developer's approach to that one...

I try to make sure it works ok on the 'worst' setup. Everything after that is a bonus. In practice that means I make 0.03 the minimum frame delay, which usually degrades passably well when taken up to 0.07.
"Failing gracefully".

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:06, archived)

i dunno,

I'm rather sold on the original to be honest :-P

(

AgentMuu hentai coordination, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:01, archived)

FASTER

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:12, archived)

always undermining me!

i'll tie you up by your toes, you knobgobbler!

(

AgentMuu hentai coordination, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:16, archived)

it's not about the forum, it's about your browser

go to your animation window, on the top right click the little button that makes another menu pop up and click "select all frames". Then right click one of the frames directly on its frame delay value and click "other." If your frame delay is in the 1/100s (0.03, 0.04, etc) it will be much faster. Let me know if any of that didn't make sense. this is usually best for when viewing animations in firefox. If anything put me off IE, it's the way it handles GIFs, which is to say, it fucking sucks.

(

AgentMuu hentai coordination, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:57, archived)

Those instructions sound familiar...

I'm guessing you're still using Image Ready?

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:03, archived)

photoshop has imageready's functionality built in from cs2 forward! you didn't notice?

(

AgentMuu hentai coordination, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:12, archived)

HAHAHAHAHAHA

Don't get me fucking started.
Try this... find a .gif with different frame delays on each frame and import it into photoshop, preserving the individual frame delays, LIKE YOU USED TO BE ABLE TO DO IN IMAGEREADY.
Actually don't waste your time, because it doesn't work, and there is absolutely no workaround to fix it. As far as I am aware, Fireworks is now the only Adobe application that can fully support all features of an imported animated gif. And Fireworks is a bloated, tacked-together mess.

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:42, archived)

yeah i use ff,anyway, thx Muu and everbody else, it was a bit of a mystery to me.

(Rattlehead all time with the gay, forever touching, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:11, archived)

Eyyyyy! It's "post any old crap for no good sodddddddding reason" tiem!

FREE Image Hosting, Resizing and Watermarking at Web2K.co.uk

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:04, archived)

i'm all for that

(

PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:07, archived)

m'kay

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:23, archived)

3/100's of a sexy second here, but I think this works in Firefox, and IE will show it much slower

(

PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:06, archived)

Has flashy black bars at the side for me, including on standalone viewer.

I ran into that same problem with this...

Not sure why.

(

Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:09, archived)

Hang on, I know this one!

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:11, archived)

FOOKIN 'AV IT!

(

AgentMuu hentai coordination, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:15, archived)

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:54, archived)

FUCK!

(

Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:16, archived)

(

AgentMuu hentai coordination, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:18, archived)

Aw hell yea

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:44, archived)

(

Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:47, archived)

(

Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:50, archived)

that's sick, that is

*puts donk on it*

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:55, archived)

(

Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:57, archived)

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

This is fucking great. Have a click.

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:52, archived)

Perfect

(

I smash things in my sleep uruk-hai ...and I'll look low. Now where'd they go?, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 4:12, archived)

that's due to my failure to fill a transprent area

(

PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:14, archived)

Not just that bulge by the cat, big rectangular stripes off the side.

Just sec and I'll try to see if I can get screen grab of the effect...

edit: 30 snaps and I got it.

(

Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:18, archived)

wow

i'm not getting those at all, I'd take your computer to the vet for a checkup pretty soon

(

AgentMuu hentai coordination, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:24, archived)

that's just odd.

(

PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:25, archived)

I guess Blingee Gifs never let you down...

(

PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:31, archived)

(

Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:36, archived)

i haven't seen such flagrant use of drop-shadow since about 1998

(

PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:40, archived)

I love a bit of drop shadow, it makes my work that much more professional

www.b3ta.com/board/9743961

(

Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:43, archived)

i cant believe that's only 2 frames

(

PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:53, archived)

We got to cgi that shit!

Tie it up tight and burst it onto the scene like outta sight, right!

(

I smash things in my sleep uruk-hai ...and I'll look low. Now where'd they go?, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 4:09, archived)

Pedro never, ever lets us down.

I'm highly amused.

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:12, archived)

bless you, young man.

(

PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:19, archived)

P&D, q&d

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:23, archived)

awesome :)

good skills
EDIT: this needs more replies !

(JoePesky, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:29, archived)

nice

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:34, archived)

Come Again is the best sound recording ever made. Ever.

And that comes from someone who's heard Van Morrison's "It's Too Late To Stop Now".
And Ella Fitzgerald's live set from the 1977 Montreaux Jazz Festival.
And oh bollox to it etc, I dunno if I can even be arsed to make recommenations to people in their 20s. What's the sodding point?

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:34, archived)

W&Y&H

(

Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:43, archived)

I have nothing against it.

Wink wink. Nod nod.

(

cowcat Bituminous squeegee, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:57, archived)

Us Merkins are just now getting the cable broadcast of

Monty Python's 40th Documentary (on the IFC channel)

Much high praise was included to P&D, the Goons, Bonzos and all the rest of those classic BritCom folks we colonials almost never heard of, unless we were very aware of what was happening.

And a big Nice!! to MoFaha (as usual.) Textures are spot on!

(

tubaman, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:58, archived)

I guess you had to be there

(

Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:41, archived)

upon seeing that

i'm glad i hadn't been there

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:49, archived)

Now I'm imagining that head in between Sharon Stone's legs.

It's giving me LOLs.

(

Shiksa, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:51, archived)

I was there.

And this is - surprisingly - a more accurate depiction of the goings-on than I managed to capture with my camera.

Bloody McRirick, pops up everysoddingwhere.

(Dave and TUTT, by the way, remain entirely innocent. As far as I know.)

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:55, archived)

BUT WHO WAS CUNT

(

hanke murphy, I'm a mess, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:01, archived)

We are.

We all are.

(

Shiksa, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:14, archived)

FORSOOTH!

(

deodar ant trois minutes douche compris, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:04, archived)

even less good reason than previously. Apart from laffs, obviously.

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:19, archived)

why the fuck did you bother?

(JoePesky, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:30, archived)

so i could change it's facial expression:

failed.

edited size - too much mccririck

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:32, archived)

hahahahha

quality!

(JoePesky, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:33, archived)

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:37, archived)

have another whiskey :P

(JoePesky, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:45, archived)

Sex-ay

(

Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:16, archived)

confusion becomes me?

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:24, archived)

FUCK NO

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:24, archived)

Oh, for heaven's sake.

He's still trying to grasp imaginary tits bigger than his head while he's got a perfectly decent pair himself.

Some people are never satisfied.

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:26, archived)

Brrrr.....

(

dbond, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:01, archived)

Zeltergiset?

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:04, archived)

Everyone's answering to that today, be careful.

(

zoldergoose, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:05, archived)

I'm right here, what's up

(

PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:11, archived)

this image makes my brains hurt

i need emergency tiger

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:23, archived)

WOAH DUDE

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:30, archived)

ey'up

hows buuuurmingum?
(did i get the pronunciation right?)

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:52, archived)

Many people make the mistake of thinking we sound like Scousers.

Brummies don't sound like Scousers.
We sound like Brummies.

But at least you used the letter 'u'.

Some twats use other vowels.

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:03, archived)

i know where you're coming from

when i moved to yorkshire, people (well, idiots) called me 'cockney' amongst other things..
"cockney? fuck off, i'm from lincolnshire"
...
"where?"

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:11, archived)

Arseholes.

Some cunts simply refuse to learn.

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:41, archived)

He clearly knows what he's doing.

I'm smashed out me face, me. Anyone else? I was rat-arsed on radio 5 on Monday night, too.

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:33, archived)

i'm very, very sober

boo

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:42, archived)

Happy fucking tuesday

Post your spiders and/or dreadful puns here. If you haven't got any then draw a spider. They're dead easy.

(

zoldergoose, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:47, archived)

I don't have a spider

But I do have a pun
I'll find it:

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:48, archived)

Oh no, pip.

(

zoldergoose, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:50, archived)

I hope you like spiders

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:53, archived)

Excellent

There's not many animals you can draw using only one shape on Paint.

(

zoldergoose, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:56, archived)

I rekon at least 6

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:04, archived)

he has elephantitis of the forearm

3 eggs out of 5

(

McBadger COW, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:56, archived)

But I want green eggs and ham

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:56, archived)

green eggs and eggs?

waahaaaa

(

McBadger COW, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:57, archived)

EGG

EGGGGGGGGGG
EGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:59, archived)

EGS

www.youtube.com/watch?v=lr7OAAP-4-g&NR=1

(

McBadger COW, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:04, archived)

I had a pun

but no spiders...

I'm cold.

Hold me.

(

McBadger COW, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:49, archived)

Draw a spider else I'm not holding anything.

DURRRRR.

(

zoldergoose, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:50, archived)

Haha, I wish I had that spider in a hole from randomn.es on this puter :(

It's in my bookmarks on my broken one.
It's going
"DURRRRR DURRRRRRR"

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:54, archived)

Holy shit that spider can tie knots!

and *SPANG*

(

Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:50, archived)

I drawned an spydur

(JoePesky, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:58, archived)

hahaha this wins

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:59, archived)

Terrifying

(

zoldergoose, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:59, archived)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=eh9MJMOMufY

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:58, archived)

Poolside spider racism :(

(

zoldergoose, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:00, archived)

Oh ffs!

A spiderpun

Spiderpun, spiderpun, does whatever a spiderpun cun

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:00, archived)

haha

kewl :)

(JoePesky, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:04, archived)

No excuse whatsoever for posting this pic. Other than the fact that it makes me howl with laughter every time I see it.

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:05, archived)

Haha.

Yes this is appropriate.

(

zoldergoose, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:06, archived)

Hahahahhahhaa

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:06, archived)

hahha

(JoePesky, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:15, archived)

george lucas has really let himself go

(

deodar ant trois minutes douche compris, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:18, archived)

Nifty bit of engineering, but one must ask:

why the fuck did you bother?

*EDIT*
(Of course, I then asked myself: why did I bother? Um. Good question. Answer is, I'm clearly a twat. Or something.)

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:23, archived)

I calls em as I sees em

(JoePesky, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:26, archived)

uuughh

(

FIEND, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:09, archived)

Happy spider is happy

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:10, archived)

Hairy spider is hairy

(

zoldergoose, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:11, archived)

(

Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:34, archived)

They've taken the news rather badly

(Seance Trumpet has got no beef with a man enjoying a croissant, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:42, archived)

okay I drew a nice spider

they're really much smaller than this, and very shy

(

Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:57, archived)

thank fuck for that

(

deodar ant trois minutes douche compris, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:08, archived)

I don't think I've seen very many, maybe just the odd one under driftwood when I was a kid.

(

Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:42, archived)

don't think i've ever seen one

(

deodar ant trois minutes douche compris, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 3:10, archived)

Hello

(Seance Trumpet has got no beef with a man enjoying a croissant, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:35, archived)

close enough...

(

atomic A-bomb-a-nation, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:55, archived)

AaRrFf!.

(

Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 4:00, archived)

Completely unshopped pic from the Derby bash a few weeks ago.

Words still fail me.

FREE Image Hosting, Resizing and Watermarking at Web2K.co.uk

(BTW, it's Laird Dave Draws and Top Up The Tea. But it's an entirely abstract photograph, so that doesn't matter innit)

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:24, archived)

is there any actual bashing at these events or is it something of a misnomer

(

Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:26, archived)

Sort of.

I hammered the unliving shit out of a fire extinguisher with my walking stick on that evening.

But no, generally speaking, there is very little violence. I think this word "bash" is something dreamed up by middle-class people to make their lives feel a bit more exciting than they actually are.

(Just a guess!)

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:32, archived)

is that where the CLANG! came from?

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:39, archived)

Yes.

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:46, archived)

I met TUTT once

Im pretty sure she didnt like me :(

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:36, archived)

What did you do to her?

(

zoldergoose, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:40, archived)

I wore a hat?

I dunno, maybe she wanted to sex me or something

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:41, archived)

Nah, come off it.

You'd have to be pretty fucking terrible for TUTT not to like you.
I mean, she even likes me, ffs. And some really awful blokes.

Really terrible.

Frightening. Even Dr When.

But good for her.

I s'pose.

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:44, archived)

Im nice :(

the few b3tans I've met can back me up on that....

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:47, archived)

I thought my Penis was in that pIcture there for a split second, but it's just tutt's legs.

(

Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:42, archived)

No, Dave.

It's your penis.

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:45, archived)

good god, I could have sworn I had it strapped to my thigh so as to avoid any photos like this.

(

Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:46, archived)

Oh, good heavens. You're right.

It turns out it's a young woman's lower leg.

Me and my myopic eyes!

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:52, archived)

you're falling apart man!

(

Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:53, archived)

I spilled Daves beer at a london bash

I think he hates me now

(

McBadger COW, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:47, archived)

Did you?

I vaugely remember someone spilling my pint then buying me a new one, then I was as happy as a pig in shit.

(

Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:50, archived)

agh that were me

was fucked and introduced myself about 8 times to everyone, a marvellous first b3ta bash

(

McBadger COW, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:53, archived)

no harm done

had it been a random night I would have course decked you and then shouted something about your mother. But we are all friends here.

(

Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:54, archived)

'dances a merry dance'

(

McBadger COW, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:55, archived)

Come to sheffield

See calender

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:55, archived)

WHEN?

I'm too lazy to look.

And I'm newly free of missus so my time is actually my time, I'll be there. And I will drink hideous amounts of ouzo.

(

McBadger COW, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:57, archived)

There:

b3ta.com/calendar/event/21138

I don't live there anymore, but I love the place.
Maybe we can all sleep on yemens floor

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:59, archived)

fuck it, sounds like a grand time

(

McBadger COW, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:02, archived)

YEAH YEAH

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 1:04, archived)

I wouldn't wanna bump into him in a dark alley

(JoePesky, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:04, archived)

needs more black bars and space hoppers

(

tim1701 I have no board signature!!!!!, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:11, archived)

WatWentWang more like

LOL

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:18, archived)

haha. Ross Kemp has a new show. He is shown a variety of weiners and is asked his opinion.

I also realise the fourth pube on the left bollock. It was done in the name of art.

(JoePesky, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:28, archived)

I actually liked ross kemp on gangs

It was so OTT it was good

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:28, archived)

the liverpool one was genius

When the lads performed a car and motorbike show.

You know you are in liverpool when you see either a quad or an off road bike driving through an estate. As you see horses on estates in Ireland.

(JoePesky, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:31, archived)

I didnt see any of the ones in GB

I only saw the ones where he went abroad and was proper shitting himself as he went in cars to the middle of nowhere in the middle of the night to film people with lots of guns telling him they've killed lots of people

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:39, archived)

hehe pretty much the same as Ross Kemp in Afghanistan then ;)

(JoePesky, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:46, archived)

Originally made to fit VHS video

cover.

(

tinglto 3 sheets to the wind, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:36, archived)

I'd rather my kids saw grossly transgressive hardcore wotnot of all sorts

than expose them to such grotesque distortions of the English language.
But then, (exhales breezily)...

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:41, archived)

transgender hardcore?

*reads again*
oh.

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:53, archived)

... I haven't got any kids.

TFFT.

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:53, archived)

Hey

Picasso's full name was actually Pablo Diego José Francisco de Paula Juan Nepomuceno María de los Remedios Cipriano de la Santísima Trinidad Ruiz y Picasso.
In the early 20th century, Picasso divided his time between Barcelona and Paris.

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:06, archived)

You should do b3ta-based classes. I'd enrol.

(

zoldergoose, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:08, archived)

I figured he liked arty facts.

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:17, archived)

My name is Pablo Diego José Francisco de Paula Juan Nepomuceno María de los Remedios Cipriano de la Santísima Trinidad Ruiz y Picasso.

You killed my father.

Ummm...

Oh, bugger. I've forgot what I meant to say now.

*shuffles off with deflated-looking shoulders*

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:13, archived)

My name is Pablo Diego José Francisco de Paula Juan Nepomuceno María de los Remedios Cipriano de la Santísima Trinidad Ruiz y Picasso.

You can call me Pele.

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:24, archived)

HEY, PICASSO

(

Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:27, archived)

WOOD ! __________ WOOD !

(

Valin I changed glasses while I wasn't looking, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:28, archived)

wood, woodn't

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:28, archived)

Wooden eye !

(

Valin I changed glasses while I wasn't looking, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:32, archived)

wooden tit?

(Cakie Rose from the dead on, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:53, archived)

That too !

(

Valin I changed glasses while I wasn't looking, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:59, archived)

HARELIP! HARELIP!

(

HairyTwatter certified eel and sodium salesman, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:23, archived)

BUT THIS WILL NEVER WORK GARY? YOUR HEAD

IS THE SIZE OF MY UPPER TORSO AND WE BOTH HAVE HANDS
UP OUR ARSES. I'LL ALWAYS LOVE YOU GARY.

(

monkdagola but how do you TURN a phrase?, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:30, archived)

that's how fires start

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:32, archived)

Smoldering sawdust Gary !

(

Valin I changed glasses while I wasn't looking, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:33, archived)

You and your bloody unshopped (albeit animated) wedding photos.

You won't be so pleased with yrself when she finally gets rid of you!

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:32, archived)

Just wait till we have a little shaver !

(

Valin I changed glasses while I wasn't looking, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:34, archived)

Oh, Chucky.

He's a delightful young man.

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:37, archived)

You bet . . . wait'll he gets hold of the old lady !

(

Valin I changed glasses while I wasn't looking, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:38, archived)

we can't go on meeting like this........

GRANDMA!

(

Elvis impersonator, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:32, archived)

Can't see the forest for the wood anyway . . .

(

Valin I changed glasses while I wasn't looking, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:35, archived)

oh shit

this gives me teh fear.

(

HairyTwatter certified eel and sodium salesman, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:23, archived)

All made from tree fear !

(

Valin I changed glasses while I wasn't looking, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:59, archived)

GOTTLE O' GEAR

(

Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 2:26, archived)

(robc1, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:21, archived)

Yes, this definately looks rude now.

(

JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:22, archived)

It does!

(

monkdagola but how do you TURN a phrase?, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:24, archived)

Oh Jesus, there are cocks everywhere.

(

JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:24, archived)

cock-eyed bastards

haha

(JoePesky, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:24, archived)

what's wrong with prescott?

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:26, archived)

He's in heaven

(

boris the spider, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:26, archived)

don't get my hopes up

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:28, archived)

sorry :(

i think he's actually in the pie shop at the minute

(

boris the spider, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:31, archived)

~~shop~~ warehouse, shirley?

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:33, archived)

he cleaned that out earlier

he's finishing off the stuff that's on display. including the ones made out of plastic.

(

boris the spider, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:34, archived)

he's unstoppable!

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:50, archived)

His cocks aren't in the correct place.

(

monkdagola but how do you TURN a phrase?, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:26, archived)

hahahahaha this badly deserves to be FP'd

(

AgentMuu hentai coordination, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:35, archived)

(herman:D, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:23, archived)

Haha I like that

(

boris the spider, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:23, archived)

Dirty bastad.

What?

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:27, archived)

CLANG.

CLANG. CLANG. CLANG. CLANG. CLANG.

(

boris the spider, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:33, archived)

Ssssshhhh!

My hosts are trying to sleep, and are actually complaining about the typing.

Yep, I've just been asked to type quieter. Ffs.

(

Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:46, archived)

Amazing.

CLANG. CLANG. CLANG. CLANG. CLANG.

(

boris the spider, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:51, archived)

hahaha

I couldn't be a doctor me.....no way!

(

Elvis impersonator, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:27, archived)

Reminds me a bit of this sign I saw in a local drug store

Unfortunate Rictus

only slightly s-hopped

(

tubaman, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:43, archived)

I WILL TURN THIS CAR AROUND

(

AgentMuu hentai coordination, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:18, archived)

BAD BOY!

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:20, archived)

I am so turned on right now!

(

Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:21, archived)

i glanced at your sig and laughed so hard i spat on my screen

you bastard

(

AgentMuu hentai coordination, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:23, archived)

Take that Jan Moir! ;)

(

Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:27, archived)

haha

i muttered "YEEEEAAAAHH" out loud right in time with that anim :-D

(

AgentMuu hentai coordination, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:29, archived)

Wag the dog !

(

Valin I changed glasses while I wasn't looking, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:21, archived)

Turn it around then

I can bugger the other end too

(

monkdagola but how do you TURN a phrase?, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:21, archived)

hahaha

not sure wtf is happening lols

(

Elvis impersonator, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:23, archived)

aaaaaaaaaahhhhhahhhah crikey!

(

Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:24, archived)

FUCK YES.

(

HairyTwatter certified eel and sodium salesman, Tue 20 Oct 2009, 0:25, archived)

This seemed like such a better idea in my head

but somehow things rarely come out like they should have done.

Click image for a bandwidth-raping but larger and prettier 704k, if you share my love of pretty women and general relativity.

(

boris the spider, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:16, archived)

I'd rotate her palette

Wink wink, nudge nudge

(

PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:17, archived)

I'd look for the hair on *her* black hole

huh huh huh

no, sorry, that joke doesn't work outside of geek circles :(

(

boris the spider, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:19, archived)

i wouldn't touch her with yours

after seeing her touch russle brand.

(

Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:28, archived)

double-bag it and you'd be fine

if a bit desensitised

(

boris the spider, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:32, archived)

She be dazzling !

(

Valin I changed glasses while I wasn't looking, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:19, archived)

She's got a big black hole and an impressive ring!

huh huh huh

Sorry, these jokes just make me look nerdier by the minute :(

(

boris the spider, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:20, archived)

well hellooo

it would be like having sex with rosie from the jetsons

(

AgentMuu hentai coordination, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:19, archived)

phwooar

just the thought of it gets me all turned on

(

boris the spider, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:23, archived)

groovy

i'd rape her bandwidth

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:19, archived)

woo.....I like the corona especially

(

Elvis impersonator, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:19, archived)

I can't take any credit for the animation

I lifted it from a website that's got quite a few of them, visualising different things to do with black holes. And now I can't find the bloody site!

Edit: turns out it wasn't from the site I thought it was, I stole it from Wikimedia Commons instead. commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:BlackHole_Lensing.gif

(

boris the spider, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:21, archived)

She can collide my hadron all day!

(

monkdagola but how do you TURN a phrase?, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:23, archived)

I'd let her

expose my axino!

I'm going to kill myself now.

(

boris the spider, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:26, archived)

I'd fuck her

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:28, archived)

you'd Financially Uphold Cooking Kittens her?

(

monkdagola but how do you TURN a phrase?, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:32, archived)

Who wouldn't?

(

boris the spider, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:33, archived)

I think it's ace!

(

Marty McFly can't grate cheese without getting angry, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:42, archived)

cheers!

(

boris the spider, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:52, archived)

old joke I know but......

apologies if NSFW

www.b3tards.com/u/c90a0a6644f58a75c0f2/whodyanikabolokov.jpg

LOL he has no pance on LOL

(JoePesky, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:07, archived)

not sure where to look

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:09, archived)

one eye in huyton, one eye in brighton

(JoePesky, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:13, archived)

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:15, archived)

I think I feel ill

Well played! :)

(

boris the spider, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:17, archived)

hahaha

(JoePesky, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:19, archived)

hahaha

that took a second or two to load so the lead up to the final frame started slower and got progressively faster, making it way more dramatic

(

AgentMuu hentai coordination, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:20, archived)

STOP STOP OH GOD STOP!

(

monkdagola but how do you TURN a phrase?, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:25, archived)

and yet you keep watching...

keep watching...
(smaller text)
watching...
(smaller still)
watching...

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:31, archived)

small

(

monkdagola but how do you TURN a phrase?, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:32, archived)

i'll figure that out, eventually

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:35, archived)

I think that any image which gives me a boner is considered NSFW

(

PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:14, archived)

good job you're not at work, then?

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:16, archived)

actually, I have 12 minutes left here

But I am alone

(

PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:18, archived)

12 minutes of quality masterbation time

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:20, archived)

12 minutes?

HA! I was done in less than 5.
*high fives myself*

(

PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:23, archived)

ewww

now wash your hands spunkfingers

(

monkdagola but how do you TURN a phrase?, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:28, archived)

I'm drunk

which makes this even more funny

(Sneezy Badger can't wait to quit his job on, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:15, archived)

Thought he was a pirate at first.

(

maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:15, archived)

hahamentals

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:16, archived)

hahaha

(

Elvis impersonator, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:30, archived)

"ooh put it in me"

"er.. it is in you"

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:21, archived)

" i'm gonna put it back in the mud"

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:23, archived)

i was kidding about the NSFW thing.

It really didn't give me a boner!!!

(

PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:22, archived)

such an anti-climax

(polished turd 404 pixels wide, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:25, archived)

That's fine. You were with me for the whole wild ride

(

PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:54, archived)

(Azrepheal Just cos Im pure evil, doesnt make me a bad person, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:02, archived)

What?

(

Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:04, archived)

For those eating

See numbers 2, 3 or 6

(Azrepheal Just cos Im pure evil, doesnt make me a bad person, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:10, archived)

I thought it was Ricky Martin

and he'd let himself go.

(

Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:16, archived)

yes

(

monkdagola but how do you TURN a phrase?, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:19, archived)

Hahaha

I get this.

Oh
*hides in corner :(*

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:06, archived)

have a pea

(Rattlehead all time with the gay, forever touching, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:06, archived)

its not tuesday yet but ...

where are they all coming from

(

FIEND, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 22:50, archived)

chortle....go easy on 'em

fire warning shots over the heads first:D

(

Elvis impersonator, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:03, archived)

Check your L evation . . .

(

Valin I changed glasses while I wasn't looking, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:06, archived)

Goatse mole

(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 22:49, archived)

hehe

(

zacherynuk @echo off, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:00, archived)

lol

(Rattlehead all time with the gay, forever touching, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:02, archived)

that's my dinner sorted

I don't think I could stomach even white rice after this. :P

(

PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:15, archived)

Goatse Mole! Goatse Mole!

He lives in a goatse hole!

(

Parmesan Quality b4 Quantity, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:16, archived)

On a more serious note

That would be a star-nosed mole - a truly amazing creature.

(

Parmesan Quality b4 Quantity, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 23:16, archived)

"Everyone thinks they have good taste. In your case, it's right under your nose."

(OGH, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 22:39, archived)

pffft!

nice one

(

AgentMuu hentai coordination, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 22:55, archived)

You Don't Have To Put On The Red Light (unless you play Expert)

(__, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 22:31, archived)

*finally notices the pootling*

*groans*

(

mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 22:36, archived)

shirely

'unless you're on pro'

(

Holly Would long wheel based tranny, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 22:37, archived)

I like Sting

*hides*

(

monkdagola but how do you TURN a phrase?, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 22:40, archived)

haha....

one of his few good tracks..........godawful these days:(

(

Elvis impersonator, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 22:40, archived)

Somebody call the cops !

(

Valin I changed glasses while I wasn't looking, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 22:43, archived)

hahahah

I love the roxanne drinking game. 3 minutes of fun

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 22:45, archived)

old dog...

(Dr Frank, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 22:23, archived)

Nice cat!

(

Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 22:24, archived)

« Older messages | Newer messages »