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#

thanks to toasty for the original convert
(I helped save b3ta! Damocles wants no part of your debauchery, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:48, archived)
# Staring competition!

(I helped save b3ta! Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:49, archived)
# that's some crackin' blinkage :D
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:49, archived)
# There's a chap named prodigy69
Who is very fond of his wine,
but once drank too much,
and dressed like lord sutch
and now does it all the time
(I helped save b3ta! FIEND, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 15:06, archived)
# *waggles 'tashe*
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 15:32, archived)
# Hahaha!
Great stuff.
And Toasty's original too.
(I helped save b3ta! Fresh Water Mole loves his baby boy more and more every day, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:50, archived)
# hahaha!
wonderfully prolonged punchline, there. :)
(I helped save b3ta! enceladus, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:52, archived)
# haha lovely animation
now give the cat a sign that says "Cunt!" on it ;)
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:53, archived)
# Simples
(cenaris Is dividing 3 by waffle, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:55, archived)
# Poor piggy
(I helped save b3ta! kinks rock over London, rock on Chicago, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:41, archived)
# hahaha
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:43, archived)
# Mmmmm pork scratchings....
(I helped save b3ta! Fresh Water Mole loves his baby boy more and more every day, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:44, archived)
# *invites over to barbecue*
(I helped save b3ta! pzyko Query failed., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:45, archived)
# *shakes over barbecue*
roasts....hmmmmmm
(I helped save b3ta! The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:46, archived)
# Do not eat the leprous pig.
(I helped save b3ta! kinks rock over London, rock on Chicago, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:49, archived)
# pfft!
(I helped save b3ta! enceladus, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:45, archived)
# hahaha very good!
(I helped save b3ta! Wildyles is back to rimming chimps, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:45, archived)
# arf
(benito vaselini no not that one, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:47, archived)
# hahahaha
arf
(I helped save b3ta! FIEND, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:52, archived)
[challenge entry] I drew a limerick

I heard it a long time ago, and it's still the only one I can ever remember...
(I helped save b3ta! enceladus, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:41, archived)
# haha, oh dear.
also - look who I found. Is this the work of a b3tan?
www.theshiznit.co.uk/feature/why-i-hate-richard-curtis.php
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:42, archived)
# I think my missus wrote that :D
actually, she's usually a bit more critical of his films
(I helped save b3ta! HappyToast Groat froth, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:55, archived)
# Haha.
I hate that cunt, too.
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:55, archived)
# nice hatchet job!
(I helped save b3ta! enceladus, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:56, archived)
# Lovely drawings.
:D
(I helped save b3ta! Fresh Water Mole loves his baby boy more and more every day, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:45, archived)
# aw... thanks.
I am rather amatuerish - that's why I stick to photos usually!
(I helped save b3ta! enceladus, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:47, archived)
# haha :D
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:48, archived)
# :D
(I helped save b3ta! enceladus, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 15:10, archived)
#

(I helped save b3ta! Fresh Water Mole loves his baby boy more and more every day, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:30, archived)
# pssst Moet? Spirit?
(I helped save b3ta! doog Don't read this., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:31, archived)
# ^
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:31, archived)
# Stop wine-ing.
:D
(I helped save b3ta! Fresh Water Mole loves his baby boy more and more every day, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:32, archived)
# Ale do what I like, thank you!
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:32, archived)
# Ok stop now
It will all end in beers
(I helped save b3ta! Frogbeat, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:34, archived)
# something something eggnog
(I helped save b3ta! doog Don't read this., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:35, archived)
# Pffftttt...
(I helped save b3ta! Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:36, archived)
# Cointreau-ry to popular belief
That was no pun
(I helped save b3ta! Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 15:09, archived)
# <
(I helped save b3ta! Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:32, archived)
# ^v^
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:33, archived)
# (OvO)
(I helped save b3ta! Ttssattsr, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:34, archived)
#

ö¿ö
` O
(I helped save b3ta! Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:51, archived)
# ( o )( o )
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:54, archived)
# It's probably
A water sample from Rothbury river.
(I helped save b3ta! Dervel OTBC, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:36, archived)
# haha Essence of Roaul
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:41, archived)
# he never said he was a particularly GOOD spirit guide
(Canazza is mostly listening to Yes, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:38, archived)
# On the level?
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:31, archived)
# I was wondering the same myself...
(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:38, archived)
# as b3ta's representative in the Spirits industry
may I be the first to say *groan*
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:32, archived)
# *ahem*
representative in single largest UK consumer of the products of
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:42, archived)
# haha
well I do get it free!
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:53, archived)
# haha
this explains his 'gift'
(benito vaselini no not that one, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:32, archived)
# just what you need to impress the goul of your dreams
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:33, archived)
# haha...
oh dear.
(I helped save b3ta! enceladus, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:35, archived)
# Needs more SAMbuca!
/coat
(I helped save b3ta! Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:36, archived)
# It's about all he's good for, the egotistical, crass and raving fraud
(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:39, archived)
# Oh I don't know, I really liked 'most farted' on youtube.
(I helped save b3ta! Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:42, archived)
# *books flight*
(I helped save b3ta! doog Don't read this., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:28, archived)
# ha ha ha :D
The rotter.
(I helped save b3ta! The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:29, archived)
# hahaha
(I helped save b3ta! doog Don't read this., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:30, archived)
# :D
(I helped save b3ta! Fresh Water Mole loves his baby boy more and more every day, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:31, archived)
# oh dear
I occasionally refer to Mrs S as Swindon Travelodge

She hits me when I do.
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:29, archived)
# I'd hit her
back
(I helped save b3ta! doog Don't read this., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:30, archived)
# Bogey puns?
(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:34, archived)
# ....*facepalms*
oh dear.
(I helped save b3ta! The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:35, archived)
# clever. made me chuckle
(I helped save b3ta! doog Don't read this., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:36, archived)
# *pokes*
*waves*

*relurks*
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:36, archived)
# 'ello you :)
(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:37, archived)
# Howdy :)
I suck at lurking...
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:40, archived)
# haha, hope you and yours are all well m'dear :)
(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:43, archived)
# Alas the small is poorly
On the plus side, that means I am home, so while she's asleep, I get to sniff around the ol' b3taboard :)
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:53, archived)
# huzzah!
(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:54, archived)
# *sniff sniff*
Ok, own up, who had the vindaloo last night?
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:55, archived)
# hahaha
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:38, archived)
# we'll always have parrots
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:43, archived)
# plastic or plaster?
(I helped save b3ta! doog Don't read this., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:45, archived)
# plastic
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:47, archived)
# not plaster of parrots then? *hangs head*
(I helped save b3ta! doog Don't read this., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 15:28, archived)
# *slap*
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 15:33, archived)
# I bet she's seen a cockatoo
(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:52, archived)
# :)
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 15:31, archived)
# AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
(I helped save b3ta! pzyko Query failed., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:46, archived)
# pffh :)
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:34, archived)
# haha - silly!
(I helped save b3ta! enceladus, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:35, archived)
# In trying out an idea, it seems I've reinvented V For Vendetta, but you get the idea:
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:13, archived)
# Horay for Atheists
hip hip horay!
(cenaris Is dividing 3 by waffle, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:17, archived)
# Why it is always louver windows in you images?
(I helped save b3ta! Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:18, archived)
# Perhaps he's a louvre and not a fighter ;)
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:20, archived)
# A blinding bit of punnery there.
(I helped save b3ta! Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:22, archived)
# oh shutter up with these puns
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:25, archived)
# Without him, it would be curtains for all of us.
(I helped save b3ta! doog Don't read this., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:25, archived)
# Blinding response
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:27, archived)
# I dont think these jokes are actually funny
But they do help cover my pane.
(I helped save b3ta! Dervel OTBC, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:28, archived)
# because -
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:25, archived)
# you forgot to carry the 1
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:27, archived)
# STOP!
.
.
.
.
Carry 1
(I helped save b3ta! Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:30, archived)
# I forked out to harrie the nun?
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:37, archived)
# you forgot to carry the 1
(I helped save b3ta! Ttssattsr, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:29, archived)
# You forgot to eat your bun.
(I helped save b3ta! Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:31, archived)
# You forgot
Carrie Wan
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:34, archived)
# You say Godless as though it was a bad thing
but the expression "son of a bitch" troubles me why does the Mother get blamed for the offspring? After all Mrs Hilter might have been a lovely caring person and not lke her vile offspring at all.
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:18, archived)
# I'm not so sure it's about blame for the offspring..
and more about insulting someones mother.


Yo momma so ugly she's on the b3ta meme page under 'OMFG'
(I helped save b3ta! Airman Gabber Living life like a 70's BBC presenter, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:25, archived)
# Klara Hitler was a devout Roman Catholic and attended church regularly with her children.
/wiki
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:25, archived)
# Klara you say?
She sounds hot.
(I helped save b3ta! Airman Gabber Living life like a 70's BBC presenter, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:26, archived)
#
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Klara_Hitler
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:32, archived)
# You gone spoiled it all with facts.
(I helped save b3ta! Airman Gabber Living life like a 70's BBC presenter, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:37, archived)
# ive always thought that it's quite a roundabout way of insulting someone.
Call them a cunt if you think theyre a cunt, dont bring their mother into it.
(benito vaselini no not that one, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:27, archived)
# ^this
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:35, archived)
# The only way to be.
nice work there, sir.
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:20, archived)
# the only trouble with being an atheist is that you have to defend the fact that you aren't crazy
that is much easy if you aren't actually crazy
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:23, archived)
# I thought it was the other way around.
(I helped save b3ta! Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:24, archived)
# it should be a default position
but you have be activist about it these days.

It's like people having to actually state that they don't believe in fairies and having to defend their position.
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:26, archived)
# It'd be nice if everyone could just believe whatever they believe
And not have to justify anything to anyone

/dreaming of a far-off Utopia blog
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:29, archived)
# YOU BLOODY UTOPIANS MAKE ME SICK
WITH YOUR VISIONS OF WONDERFUL SOCIETY!

(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:31, archived)
# I know, I'm sorry
I'll just go over here and sob quietly.






*sobs*
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:33, archived)
# Don't let the nasty man upset you!
*hugs*
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:35, archived)
# Yay, hugs!
How you doing these days sirrah?
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:37, archived)
# Not bad, thanks :)
really sore throat today, though :(
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:39, archived)
# Aw :(
*proffers Lemsip*
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:41, archived)
#
can I come to Utopia when they finish it pweese?
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:40, archived)
# As long as you're nice and promise to believe whatever you like
And bring cayke.
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:42, archived)
# OK
you all like cheesecake right. I mean what kind of idiot doesn't like cheesecake. I couldn't be friends with anyone who doesn't like cheesecake
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:54, archived)
# Lots of cheesecake in Utopia!
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:57, archived)
# As long as it's science and not nonsense.
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:35, archived)
# But why can't people believe in nonsense?
I mean, some people believe Big Brother is good tv, and we don't go around burning them at the stake or antyhing do we?

(May well be shooting myself in the foot with this argument....)
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:40, archived)
# Let's see him kick some God-botherers' arses
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:23, archived)
# I found this oldie of mine the other day and thought of you
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:26, archived)
# ... in fact...

there's a rain version.
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:27, archived)
# Haaaaaaahahahahahahahahahahaah
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:39, archived)
# a knight in full armor holding a lance, standing on the castle walls at night, watching the moon and praying for tomorrow's victory
(I helped save b3ta! pzyko Query failed., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:53, archived)
# poor turtle! having quietly hidden from its pursuers under a discarded hat for some hours now, it finally emerged again believing the threat long gone, only to be impaled on the spot! poor turtle!
(I helped save b3ta! pzyko Query failed., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 15:02, archived)
# This reminds of something
But I can't think what.

It's not V for Vendetta though.
edit: By which I mean it's something else as well
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:26, archived)
# Oh! Oh! I know! Mummenschanz!
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:31, archived)
# What the dog-milking fuck??
www.youtube.com/watch?v=3eazq_8jCOg
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:34, archived)
# That's them
Nutters
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:35, archived)
# Something from The Watchmen?
Rorschach?
(I helped save b3ta! tubaman, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 16:57, archived)
# Nice.
(I helped save b3ta! Fresh Water Mole loves his baby boy more and more every day, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:34, archived)
# enigmatic - nice!
(I helped save b3ta! enceladus, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:36, archived)
[challenge entry] Old limerick we sang at school.

Seems there's many versions of this limerick but this is mine.
(I helped save b3ta! Airman Gabber Living life like a 70's BBC presenter, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:04, archived)
[challenge entry] WHTA?
no idea. Have some icons






(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:13, archived)
# See. This is the problem with this compo.
Without the words most of these limerics could mean anything.


Is Horace falling on sooty?
(I helped save b3ta! Airman Gabber Living life like a 70's BBC presenter, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:16, archived)
# actually
I prefer your idea - many of the rest are just toapy toapy toap toap

Is 'Horace falling on Sooty?' sounds like a euphemism for something
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:18, archived)
# There once was a leader called Bill
who scoffed Viagra until he was ill
his farts became shocking
his heat started popping
and his nuts ended up in Brazil
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:19, archived)
[challenge entry] Lordy...


Click for bigger (17 kb)
(orangehaslotsoffruit shout for all the people who have nothing to say, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:51, archived)
# hehe
www.b3ta.com/board/10173144

great minds and all that
(benito vaselini no not that one, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:53, archived)
#
Aha, just spotted you got their first, sorry! Spent too long looking for Maggie... and looking for what rhymes with Hague..
(orangehaslotsoffruit shout for all the people who have nothing to say, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:01, archived)
# to the lawer mobile!
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:53, archived)
#
(^ What She Said and probably what they are about to all say ¬, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:58, archived)
#
Some B3tans came up with a plan
A plan which deserved a long ban
To limericks write
Although they were shite
'Cause nobody knew how to scan
(glammerocity state of the art Luddite, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:42, archived)
[challenge entry] afternoon all
(I helped save b3ta! revolution now 👊, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:25, archived)
# A "doctorate" in some artsy subject
and she thinks she's fucking Quincy, MD. I say "doctorate" as she didn't really earn one.
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:35, archived)
# She doctored a certificate all right.
(I helped save b3ta! Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:36, archived)
# Win!
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:37, archived)
# Just looked her up on wikipedia.
What a joke...

I never use the title unless it's something to do with work or formal modes of address.
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:43, archived)
# but her 'work' is selling common sense to credulous idiots
so i think she's entitled to call herself whatever she wants
(benito vaselini no not that one, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:00, archived)
# Lolwhat?
The ASA decided otherwise. As for common sense, most of her stuff is just quackery.
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:03, archived)
# moo
(I helped save b3ta! pzyko Query failed., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:59, archived)
# Excellent
There's always room for more McKeith-based japery.
(I helped save b3ta! Amish Information Systems hates misplaced, commas, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 22:02, archived)
# We have new icons
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:25, archived)
# Let's see em then.
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:28, archived)
# ok then
, , and .
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:29, archived)
# Aw fuck yeah
cat is great - so is lemming - fuck my eyes, what's the one on the left?

Ok, I got it.
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:30, archived)
# it's meant to be this
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:32, archived)
# I met a strange bearded man in a dutch squat once...
who claimed to have made JSW or it could have been JBJ, I can't remember.

/purplehaze
(I helped save b3ta! Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:34, archived)
# Then he was probably telling the truth!
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Matthew_Smith_%28games_programmer%29

"Smith closed Software Projects in 1988 without completing any more programs and "vanished" for a while. He was living in a Dutch commune from around 1995 but was deported from the Netherlands in October 1997 and returned to Britain.
.
(I helped save b3ta! The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:37, archived)
# :O
Oh my! I remember he had a laptop with him aswell,
I recall him showing me some stuff.
We were pretty wasted, or at least me and the rest of the squatters were!
(I helped save b3ta! Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:39, archived)
# there's plenty of photos of the coder about
was it him? en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Matthew_Smith_%28games_programmer%29
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:38, archived)
# Your next mission (should you choose to accept it)

is to get an interview with the legend that is Matthew Smith :)
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:42, archived)
# I sent him a few emails years ago for that very reason
and heard nothing back - would love to interview him mind
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:44, archived)
# yea I think there's a load of people who would love to interview him :D
In my opinion he kick started the gaming boom over here..utter legend
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:46, archived)
# also David Braben and Ian Bell would be good interviewees
The writers of Elite: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elite_%28video_game%29
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:09, archived)
# That's definately the fella!
The place was in Leiden not far from the dam.
(I helped save b3ta! Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:44, archived)
# haha fab :)
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:47, archived)
# I want that icon now.
A tribute to the man.
(I helped save b3ta! Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:52, archived)
# Haha fucking ace.
I really hope you're telling the truth.
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:32, archived)
# could've been him (Matthew Smith) ...he went crazy on acid and buggered off over there
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:38, archived)
# Freaked the fuck out!
He was born in London, but his family moved around a great deal, finally ending up in Wallasey.

I live like 3 miles away from Wallasey!
(I helped save b3ta! Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:07, archived)
# *plays spooky music* :D
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:13, archived)
# You are Matthew Smith
AICMFP
(I helped save b3ta! Eduard Khil's Haircut is lurking and liking on, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:18, archived)
# Shhhh!
(I helped save b3ta! Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:23, archived)
# ^ this
Keyboard cat is awesome. I'm torn now. :(
(I helped save b3ta! Halibut If you think education is expensive, try crack., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:44, archived)
# woohoo!
your cock and balls are very blocky
(I helped save b3ta! HappyToast Groat froth, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:28, archived)
# I never knew he was a cockblocker!
(I helped save b3ta! Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:31, archived)
# Jet Set Willy looks like he's been cleaved in the head
the rest are fab

(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:29, archived)
# he got sliced in one of those slicing levels
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:31, archived)
# we must perform a quirkafleeg :D
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:34, archived)
# Oh, that's who it is.
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:32, archived)
[challenge entry] this was my attempt but it lacks definition


edit: and transparency - fuck it - I can't be arsed fixing it
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:22, archived)
# Boo-ya!
...Let's go...
(I helped save b3ta! Rocker_44 (-_-) shhhhh! Is asleep on, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:29, archived)
# fuck!
Cats!
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Scunner She’s a he, technically, but she’s scalding hot, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:30, archived)
# Done and done
(I helped save b3ta! Quijibo Esq. BSc. May contain traces of nuts, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:32, archived)
# I am crushed that the ones I spent ten minutes on aren't included
(I helped save b3ta! zoldergoose, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:32, archived)
# just wait 18 months for when the next lot are released
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Scunner She’s a he, technically, but she’s scalding hot, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:35, archived)
# I'll be reposting them twice a day until then.
(I helped save b3ta! zoldergoose, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:37, archived)
# it's possible the next lot will be sooner
Cr3 has made me an admin thing to handle this - before I had to fiddle with the DB by hand and didn't like doing it.
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:43, archived)
# Ditto
www.b3ta.com/board/10132360
(I helped save b3ta! Guff McFlange Yes, but can it be made out of Lego?, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:09, archived)
# Haha - lemming!
(I helped save b3ta! Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:04, archived)
# Floppy disk > all of these.
(I helped save b3ta! Ttssattsr, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:26, archived)
# Shame about Miner/Jet Set Willy
I think he's chopped off at the point where you can tell them apart...
(I helped save b3ta! Bloop Fri 16 Jul, 22:10, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:35, archived)
[challenge entry] :)
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:21, archived)
# He was an ass anyway!
Arf!
(I helped save b3ta! Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:23, archived)
# tough crowd
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:48, archived)
# POOF!
/DONKEY

I like it! What program do you use to do your drawings?
(I helped save b3ta! El_MUERkO bleeds love, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:58, archived)
# I use flash cs4
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:07, archived)
#
(I helped save b3ta! doog Don't read this., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:10, archived)
# Misles?
FUCKING MISLES!
(I helped save b3ta! Mr Gear the gay-maker, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:18, archived)
# Laser-guided Misles!
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:23, archived)
# misles and pisles
(I helped save b3ta! Paul_P, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:34, archived)
# :o/


oooh me grapes
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:22, archived)
# just a couple of
(resistanceisfutile, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:07, archived)
[challenge entry] A good way to tell the kids not to eat seeds.
Photobucket

Cheers, mum.
(Spy is dead., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:06, archived)
# :D
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:22, archived)
# meme on!
(I helped save b3ta! HappyToast Groat froth, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:04, archived)
# haha
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:05, archived)
# I knew there would be an uprising!
(I helped save b3ta! Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:08, archived)
# he's up to summit!! :D
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:19, archived)
# It involves a block of wood, a bucket and a large bowl
I think he's making a space-ship!
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:20, archived)
#

I miss pie cat
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:23, archived)
# watching your movements and stealing your bonbons
(I helped save b3ta! HappyToast Groat froth, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:21, archived)
# not the bonbons :(

bastard cats!
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:25, archived)
# I read that as bonobos at first.
I'm going to stick with that image.
(I helped save b3ta! Quijibo Esq. BSc. May contain traces of nuts, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:39, archived)
[challenge entry]
useless pun, shoddy rhytm, true story:

www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/7973024/Man-blows-himself-up-trying-to-kill-a-spider.html
(funktrash soul = combustion engine, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 12:53, archived)
# Who thinks what?
WHO THINKS WHAT?!!
(__, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 12:54, archived)
# Thinks
Essex Innit?

(I don't know either)
(I helped save b3ta! Piper Alpha is being a grumpy northerm bastard on:, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 12:56, archived)
# "Essex" and "Thinks" are mutually exclusive, shirely?
/casual racism blog
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 12:59, archived)
# Casual racism is fine, it's that other kind that is bad.
(I helped save b3ta! Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:04, archived)
# smart racism?
Sunday Best racism? Done up to the nines racism?

;) Absolutely, I was going to write "causal colloquialist blog" but that isn't even a word.
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:08, archived)
# Elementary animated gif that doesn't animate error 101
update: you have fixed it.

But I think there is more to that story than him trying to kill a spider with a can or aerosol, I think he was pratting about trying to burn it by lighting the spray and it backfired.
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 12:56, archived)
# ...
A spokesman added: "We're not entirely sure whether the spider got away or not but there was no sign of it at the scene."
(I helped save b3ta! Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 12:58, archived)
# They should have nuked it from space, it is the only way to be sure!
(I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:00, archived)
# Is this the start of a Haiku?
In Essex, that daft
bunch who thinks that spiders will
fit down bathroom sinks
(benito vaselini no not that one, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 12:59, archived)
# Pffft
I heard a similar story at school: a man had been chastised by his wife for leaving the bog stinking, so while crapping he sprayed the bowl liberally with air freshener. Afterwards, he tapped out his pipe into the bowl, causing an explosion that not only shattered the toilet but left him with serious injuries. As he was being stretchered down the stairs, he explained to the paramedics how it had happened; one was laughing so hard they dropped him, adding a broken arm to his troubles.

/qotw blog
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 14:05, archived)
[challenge entry]
(__, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 12:50, archived)
# This made me laugh.
click
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 12:51, archived)
# Ha!
I think "ha!" is all I write these days. I've run out of funny.
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:15, archived)
# haha
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:20, archived)
#
brill
(I helped save b3ta! daveyclayton Gosh, is it really, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:45, archived)
[challenge entry]
(I helped save b3ta! doog Don't read this., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 12:47, archived)
# Doesn't scan.
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 12:50, archived)
# unlike all the others o_O
(I helped save b3ta! doog Don't read this., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 12:54, archived)
# Nice nihilimerick.
(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti., Thu 2 Sep 2010, 12:59, archived)
# This is great.
Especially the way you're conjugating 'verb' as though it were a verb.
(I helped save b3ta! Curis, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:11, archived)
[challenge entry] If looks could kill (you wouldn't need heavy sedatives)
(I helped save b3ta! Piper Alpha is being a grumpy northerm bastard on:, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 12:44, archived)
# the eyes, the eyes
There was a young girl called maddie
Who had a loving mummy and daddy
At least they were,
Until they murdered her
And pretended that they were sad-dy
(benito vaselini no not that one, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 12:52, archived)
# arf to both :)
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:27, archived)
[challenge entry] I'm sure I could have made something more out of the smeg and cheese, but there you go...
(I helped save b3ta! Fat Boab of dailyreckless.com fame, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 12:39, archived)
# So he'll be leaning even further to the right now?
Are you listening Clegg you turncoat git.....
(I helped save b3ta! The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 12:57, archived)
#
that's clever
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:01, archived)
# Cameron put him in there
Told him it was the door to the his cabinet
(I helped save b3ta! CanonCaliber A big bore, Thu 2 Sep 2010, 13:18, archived)

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