*gives up*
www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-africa-12403528
(PsychoChomp, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 15:19, 114 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Bankers eh???
More like wankers
www.reuters.com/article/2011/02/09/us-britain-banks-idUSTRE7182DY20110209
(PsychoChomp, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 13:03, 186 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Hi, I'll be your group leader for this session.
My name's Noel, I'm 35 and I like breasts. In my spare time I walk, cook and listen to music. You, there, why don't you introduce yourself and tell us a little about you?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 12:00, 186 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Sorry I'm late
Whoo boy way to "to counter negative portrayals of Muslims following the 9/11 terror attacks"

www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-12388540
(PsychoChomp, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 11:26, 65 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I'm going to post a news link whenever a post gets over 100 replies
I'll also make a really witty remark about the news story.

Example:
I like big butts and I went and died

www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/3401008/British-woman-20-dies-in-US-buttock-op-tragedy.html?OTC-RSS&ATTR=News
(PsychoChomp, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 10:26, 114 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Hello, good morning and welcome.
I watched 'The News' for a moment last night. One 'story' was there may possibly be (they did at least have the common decency to admit that what' evidence' there was, was at the the very best tenuous) a causal link between 'bad' food eaten as young as aged three, and a lower IQ later in life.

I have another theory: smelly povvo dimwits in counterfeit sportswear and 'goldique' earrings are more likely to feed their snotty little charges Twizzlers and Tango than mung-bean-weaving middle classers - thus, you might say, there is a link between lower IQ parents and lower IQ children. You don't fucking say.

The food link is as valid a theory as saying that well-fitting shoes have a connection with IQ. Why is everyone so fucking stupid? WHY?*

*anyone replying 'it's because they're getting poor nutrition as toddlers, Monty' will be flogged to within an inch of their lives and their tattered frames hung up by Newgate Prison as a warning to other potential miscreants.

Alt: Name a worse band than The Smiths. It's not as easy as you might think.
PS I have had enough sleep. Watch out today.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 8:28, 159 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Alright?
I have it on good authority that Jeff's willy smells of poo.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 23:16, 9 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Evening Natter anyone?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 20:59, 160 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

So, are microsoft a big evil in this, or is this a case where someone should accept personal resoncibilty?
www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1354490/Boy-11-racks-1-000-mothers-debit-card-playing-XBox-online.html#ixzz1DNRQHRUH

Surely she must have checked her statements once in the 18 months?
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 19:18, 11 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Fun with Freud!
Were you suckled as an infant? Has this milky feast (or, perhaps more pertinently, lack thereof) had any bearing on your personality or habits, would you say?
(Happybara The jungle came alive and took him, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 17:37, 31 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I heard NakedApe is a fucking bummer. He is also a 'wally'.
What did YOU hear about him?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 17:17, 50 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Mortal Wombat is an idiot
So to placate you question loving squid fuckers:

Tell me about your awesome pets, my parents cat is now 20 and is completely bald apart from his head, tail and legs. I should also mention that he is a long hair...

ALT Q: Nipples for eyes or eyes for nipples?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 16:24, 122 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

i like breasts

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 15:51, 49 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Recently I've been seriously lacking in energy.
The internet says it might be my hormones.


What serious business has the internet told you recently?
( girlinthehole, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 14:18, 168 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

bored of that
Although I don't have a new question.

Something about the best/worse time you did something that was supposed to be good/bad but was actually good/bad.

I'm having my laser eye surgery tomorrow. And I now have to go to Hammersmith. Tell em your tales of travelling. Or don't

This is Noel's fault
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 13:07, 148 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I think people should start a new thread at about the 100 replies mark.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 13:06, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Fuck Chompy and his BBC News link.
Going anywhere nice this year?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 11:22, 235 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Fuck kitty and her dead rodent
BBC NEWS LINK

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-12387767

Doesn't this make you furious?
(PsychoChomp, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 10:13, 222 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

ugh
My pet rat died last night so now I has a massive sad. And I have a week of unending misery to look forward to, followed by another and another. And I'll have to read the replies to this on my phone in secret so we don't have any more 'unpleasantness'...

SHAKE ME OUT OF THIS EMO PIT OF DESPAIR WITH YOUR LOLS

Question: What kind of phone do you have? What does it do that's super awesome? If you have an iPhone, don't answer this question.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 8:48, 174 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Death and the Merchant
My short story Death and the Merchant is now available for free online.

It's inspired by the Somerset Maugham story The Appointment in Samarra.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 7:37, 14 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

You should be in bed
why aren't you?
(berk, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 0:07, 28 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I think I've broken OT
What have you broken recently?

Alt: Have you mended anything lately?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 21:04, 248 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

My head smells like creosote.
My oven smells like spicy barbecue chicken wings. Again.
My bathroom smells like Lush bath bombs and some fruity shampoo stuff.
Tell me about smells.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 18:27, 142 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Ever read any Anton La Vey?
I was embarrassed and massively surprised to find him insightful and an eminently sensible man, on the whole. Not what I was expecting from a Ming The Merciless lookalike who minced around San Francisco with a panther on a chain.

When was the last time you were pleasantly surprised by someone/thing?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 16:46, 119 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

End of the work day thread
Today has been long and fairly boring, although the Oreo cookie brownies I made went down a treat; courtesy of Lorraine Pascal, who I am a little bit in love with.

So what should I do with the chicken in my fridge, roast the fucker or butcher the cunt and bake with spiced yoghurt?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 16:43, 17 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I don't think I belong here.
It was my flatmate's birthday on Saturday, and about twenty of her mates came up. I wasn't planning on going out but after drinking in the flat for a while got roped into it.

After the first bar everyone got split up. It ended up being just me and four girls (three stupidly fit and one a munter, bless her) I'd known for about an hour in a horrific club I usually avoid. I assume this sort of thing is most young lads' dream but not me - I can't handle one girl let alone bloody four. My place as a social outcast was confirmed further by the fact they were all dressed upto the nines and then there was me in a hoodie, albeit an ace one.

When was the last time you stuck out like a sore thumb?
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 15:07, 159 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

OK that one is taking the 'long thread' biscuit.
My question is this - would you, even with a cellophane barrier?

PS I would like to welcome ‘Happybara’ to /OT, wholeheartedly. Already you have inadvertently provided me with a great deal of entertainment and long may you continue so to do.

EDIT: if you turn out to be Bert I shall fucking kill you.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 13:37, 179 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

That threads even longer.
Right none of you are perfect obviously.
So all set yourself a challenge and this time next month I'll ask you how you've got along.

Must be a hard challenge or you're a pussy.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 12:29, 260 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

That thread is too long can someone start a new one please?
the courts recently set out an injunction prevenbting a man witth an IQ of 48 from any kind of sexual activity, I suspect with an IQ of 48 a bit of bumming was one of the few pleasures that life had afforded him.

My question: What else should chronically stupid people not be allowed to do?

I going to answer with Vote, breed or go on the internet
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 10:49, 210 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Good day to you all.
I see Gary Moore has died. I also see that I don't give a toss about this. I have nothing especially negative to say about the tedious, pug-faced Padraig 'axeman', but it reminded me of one of the biggest loads of bollocks of all time - 'don't speak ill of the dead'. Why the fuck not? A cunt who has died is just the same cunt, but mercifully, now dead.

What other commonplace phrases or practices are blatantly fucking ridiculous? NB astrology is so utterly 'medieval peasant' that there's no point in even mentioning it.

If this seems a bit too much like hard work for you at this time on a Monday: Alt: Did we all have nommy weekends? Do tell. I am simply desperate to hear all about it.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 8:31, 171 replies, latest was 15 years ago)