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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Bored with that now.
Why are you such a freak, eh?
Do you have issues if one bit of food touches another on your plate?
Do you have to eat your fry-up in a particular order?
Perhaps, like Nakers, you are scared of polystyrene?
Tell us all your neuroses and let us bully you to the end of time about it.

Alt: I'm going to the pub after work. Who's going to the pub after work?
I like the pub. Do you like the pub?
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:29, 258 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
i could go to the pub right now, stupid fucking useless people ruining my week

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:30, Reply)
You can solve all your problems with drink.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:31, Reply)
Thanks, scarpe

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:31, Reply)
I can't get it cleared because it wasn't all his fault.
I have put notes on the bits on my file though, so if any human looks at it they'll know but humans don't most the time.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:32, Reply)
Stupid machines.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:33, Reply)
I blame Skylab

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:37, Reply)
I'm not that bad
I'm not Swipe, the mentalist.
Nope, although I do tend to save bacon for the end, not sure why.
Doesn't bother me.
No.

Alt: Me, payday pint ahoy!
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:34, Reply)
These weren't intended as specific questions for you to answer individually.
More suggestions of the sort of evidence of your crumbling mental states and to stimulate discussion.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:37, Reply)
I like pickled beetroot
but I dislike the way it oppressess adjacent food with its leakings
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:38, Reply)
Red apples
Cant eat them
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:38, Reply)
did you have an allergic reaction to one?
do you have lovely soft skin and short friends?
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:40, Reply)
I think it is directly related to reading that as a kid, yes

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:45, Reply)
I eat my food in reverse order of goodness
So what's last is the best thing
Exceptions: Pasta stuff and things with rice. They get mixed together.

Also I talk to myself pretty much all the time when I'm on me own, at least when I'm doing things. God I'm so lonely.

ALT: I fucking love the pub, everything about it. I'm going to a sort of pub after work but I won't be drinking cos it's a school night.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:38, Reply)
A sort of pub?
Will most places in Ireland serve you with alcohol?
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:42, Reply)
Yeah you just take your own pint glass and find a tap, any spigot pours out poitin

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:44, Reply)
so for example, full Irish from the cafe next door (with the waitress with the excellent bum)
Butter toast
Eat toast
Eat beans
Eat eggs
Eat bacon
Make smiley face with two sausages and the black and white puddings
Eat white pudding (use to mop up sauces)
Eat black pudding
Eat sausages
Drink tea

No mushrooms cos they're filth, but sometimes they give me a hash brown. That goes between bacon and white pudding.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:44, Reply)
This means you rate Sausages over bacon
I knew you were a wrongun
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:48, Reply)
I love sausages
Yeah I prefer 'em to bacon. Bacon's nice but it's just bacon, not the wonder food the internet thinks it is.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:54, Reply)
Sausages > bacon, everyone knows that

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:27, Reply)
You are a good sort, not like these foodwrong cretins

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:31, Reply)
My girlfriend does that too
I find it odd, only eating one thing at a time.

Then again, I am a terrible fat bastard.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:00, Reply)
Nah see I'm a right fatso
But it's orderly chub, not a chaotic tubbyness
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:04, Reply)
Fair enough
I was pleased to have lost weight, I then weighed myself the other day, and was quite disappointed to have put weight back on, despite eating properly. Most meals now are meat, potatoes, veg, and not even big portions at that.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:09, Reply)
Fry up goes.
Toast.
Toast dipped in egg
Toast dipped in beans
Bacon slice one with egg
Black pudding
Sausage, can be dipped in beans but not necessary.
Finish off beans with bacon slice 2
Finish off sausage
Leave mushrooms or fried tomato or whatever.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:39, Reply)
freak

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:40, Reply)
This is more like it though.
Thanks Chompy.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:41, Reply)
you disgust me

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:41, Reply)
i know
beans, fucking ruin a cooked breakfast
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:43, Reply)
Nah, they're good.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:44, Reply)
I don't like beans on a plate
Cos they infect everything, instead of enjoying beans then enjoying other foods, you just get a plate of bean flavoured shite. They should come in a separate bowl.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:46, Reply)
Same with Egg though.
Stop moaning and get it DAHHHN yaahh
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:47, Reply)
Beans should be nuked from orbit
It's the only way to be sure.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:48, Reply)
Egg's safe!
You just cut the white bits off until you get a square that includes the yolk, and eat that in one go
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:53, Reply)
the yellow goes on the bacon, the white can get to fuck

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:54, Reply)
But then you'd have sticky bacon

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:56, Reply)
you dip Theo, DIP

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:57, Reply)
But how can you enjoy each element unless you eat them individually?
MADNESS
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:58, Reply)
My preferred method is to pile a bit of each item onto the fork and enjoy a combination of flavours and textures.
I also like to try different combinations.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:00, Reply)
didn't think quorn had that many different textures

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:02, Reply)
It is different from the textures of eggs or mushrooms or beans.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:09, Reply)
but they're the worst bits of the meal, they're the bits you eat through to get to the bits you really want

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:13, Reply)
Not when you have veggie sausages or bacon.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:16, Reply)
Surely there's other ways you can self flagellate without eating that nonsense?
Just whip yourself a bit instead, that'll do the job, then you can have proper soss
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:17, Reply)
This is also in the spirit of the question.
Good work Theobano you mentaller.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:49, Reply)
You're wrong.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:01, Reply)
You don't know what you're missing.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:44, Reply)
Needs more fried bread and white pudding.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:45, Reply)
I can never get white pudding around here.
Fried bread I do at home, but not if I go out. They don't get it right.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:46, Reply)
Some of larger supermarkets sell white pudding. Hogs pudding on the other hand is much more difficult to obtain.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:48, Reply)
I can't flit from one end of the supermarket to another.
I need to go up and down all the rows in order. It throws me a bit when they offset the rows on either side of the central aisle.

Alt: I like the pub. They have comfy seats and wifi.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:40, Reply)
You must hate Morrisons
They're all star shapes and short aisles and shit
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:40, Reply)
and smoke now!

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:48, Reply)
What?

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:51, Reply)
Our Morrisons has some kind of bizarre cold steam affair going on for the fresh herbs

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:55, Reply)
That sounds fun.
I don't think ours sells fresh herbs at all.
And it's not laid out in funny shapes, which is good, as that's where I do most of my shopping.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:57, Reply)
That's mad
They're not Pat Sharp doing a gig in Birmingham, they're just veg
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:58, Reply)
Thats a great image

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:02, Reply)
I was very distressed when my local Woolies changed the order of their fresh food sections
to the point where I stopped going there. And went ten minutes out of my way to the green grocers shop where they always have the fruit and veg in the same place.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:53, Reply)
I have no neuroses.
Alt: Of course I like the pub. What a stupid fucking question.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:44, Reply)
Short man syndrome?

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:48, Reply)
Nope.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:53, Reply)
totes goin pub fter wk friday innit blud.
Mrs Vagabond has a thing about pen lids - they have to be on the pen or she gets angsty. I'm pretty sure this is code for "please distribute pen lids around the flat, please."
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:45, Reply)
I check stairs for obstacles before I go to bed.
Not sure if this could be classed as irrational but I really don't understand why people see stairs as shelves/storage areas. Could come from the time I fell over some strategically-placed books.
Alt: I'll be drinking later but not at a pub. I do like pubs though.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:48, Reply)
I'm going to the pub, but I'm not going to be drinking tonight so no I don't like the pub.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:49, Reply)
No major mentals here
Apart from I am not keen on underpants but feel I should wear them while at work, so they have become almost a uniform item...

Alt I get pissed off with Pub, ever since the smoking ban I fond it difficult to justify standing outside to smoke, when I could just sit at home with a nice bottle of wine
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:50, Reply)
I'm not mental but I DONT LIKE PANTS
Ok...
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:54, Reply)
says the flaxseed eating vegan.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:55, Reply)
I don't freak out at the sight of meat.
I just choose not to eat it.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:56, Reply)
that's pretty neurotic though

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:58, Reply)
I fail to see a correlation here
oxforddictionaries.com/definition/english/neurosis?q=neurosis

oxforddictionaries.com/definition/english/vegetarian?q=vegetarian
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:02, Reply)
Sorry I meant the other thing, stupid

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:05, Reply)
I just like the chaps to have a bit of freedom
nowt wrong with that is there?

If I was one of those lady girls you would be at defcon bongle with that admission
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:01, Reply)
I'm pretty sure that the reason there aren't more girls posting here is because they are all a quiver and moist at the thought of you without pants.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:03, Reply)
to be fair
its quite chilly out, not a good look for the modest chap
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:04, Reply)
I like the fact that people stupid enough to smoke don't go to pubs as much these days.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:01, Reply)
Dont you oppress me

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:03, Reply)
Too late, I've already got you sitting at home drinking wine through a straw just so you can pass out on your sofa with a lit fag in your hand.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:06, Reply)
Facist

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:13, Reply)
Nothing wrong with not liking your face

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:15, Reply)
Its a fairly standard response
that and the screaming in horror
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:17, Reply)
I did not go to the pub today. I slept and then went to the doctor. But I do like the pub
I'm a freak in a world of nutters. I'm okay with that.
My neuroses include spiders, leaving the heater on, not having my diary with me, and not liking it when people mess up my order of cleaning things.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 11:51, Reply)

Give the tomato away to a freak to who likes hot fruit.
Put the beans and the egg on the toast, eat the toast.
Eat the bacon.
Eat the sausage.
Eat the plate.
Eat the cutlery.
Eat the staff.
Eat the cafe.
Eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:01, Reply)
Afternoon Bobby

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:02, Reply)
Is it? Just woke up.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:05, Reply)
They all thought you'd died
but I told them you hadn't.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:05, Reply)

thought hoped
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:07, Reply)
I blame my parents.
Nope.
No especially but I like to get a mixture on my fork, maybe a bit of bacon with a fried mushroom and some egg. I like to keep this up until the end of the meal, so I do kind of portion things so I don't just get left with one thing on my plate.
Nope, I am not a bent Spastic.
I'm mostly neurotic about trying to please everyone and feeling that if I'm less then perfect I am a failure. I'm working on this, I'm much better about not being perfect, but I still try to please others to my own detriment.

Alt: not me straight home for a weekend of doing bery little except eat, sleep and maybe a movie. I do like the pub, I may squeeze it in somewhere.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:01, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1841570
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:04, Reply)
meh, I didn't bother the read the thread before replying.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:11, Reply)
Oh and for a fry up the plate has to be hot.
Not warm, HOT, you shouldn't be able to touch it.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:07, Reply)
^ this ^

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:09, Reply)
^^^this x millions
Hot food on a cold plate is just wrong, double wrong in the case of a fry up.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:09, Reply)
Same with steak.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:10, Reply)
No no no
You cant have steak on a really hot plate otherwise it carries on cooking.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:14, Reply)
^ This ^

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:16, Reply)
Sorry, I barely read what he said
I serve my steak on a warmed plate, I mean.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:20, Reply)
OK you saved that one
JUST DONT DO IT AGAIN OK
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:22, Reply)
Fucks sake, people who put plates in the oven to warm before they serve dinner are even more pretentious than people who refer to salad as "leaves"
My mother does that, it drives me mad.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:10, Reply)
it keeps the food warm you berk

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:12, Reply)
berk probably keeps her food warm too.
She probably utilises her racist boyfriend.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:15, Reply)
We're tackling the big issues here today.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:12, Reply)
You dont' ask for chicke ceaser leaves do you?
Well you don't, because you're a fucking weirdo, but normal people don't.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:16, Reply)
I think you mean lunch or supper.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:13, Reply)
I don't mind cold food
it's better than when it's too hot to eat.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:13, Reply)
It's ok, they're not bringing the food up in the dumb waiter, I can eat my food before it gets cold

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:14, Reply)
This^

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:15, Reply)
I think a fry up should be eaten slowly with a big mug of tea.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:27, Reply)
Tea comes after the food
MUST GET FOOD DOWN EAT EAT EAT GO KEEP GOING MUST CONSUME
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:32, Reply)
my parents always ALWAYS have a cup of tea after having their tea
then ALWAYS have a second one less than half an hour later

I don't know where they put it all
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:51, Reply)
The last bite of the fry-up must have a nice bit of yolk, and something deep fried.
And every bite should contain more than one item.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:13, Reply)
I rarely read a whole thread, ever in order.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:14, Reply)
I eat a bite of each thing on the plate in turn
Sausage, then bacon, bit of egg, scoop some beans onto the toast and eat a bit, bit of mushroom, then back round again. If I've still got lots of one thing left as I approach the end I start to panic. Ideally the last go round should have one bite of each thing left.

IF NOT I HAVE TO THROW IT AWAY AND START AGAIN
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:15, Reply)
which is why you're so fat yeah?

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:16, Reply)
I don't really do this, you know
It was humorous banter.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:29, Reply)
I eat whatever goes cold quickest first
so in an average meal, veg, then meat, then potatoes, last two maybe alternate depends on type.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:18, Reply)
With roast pork
I always save the crackling until the end.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:18, Reply)
With your mum
I save fucking her arse until the end.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:19, Reply)
You are a wise man.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:20, Reply)
That's so wrong.
You eat the crackling while it's hot and crispy.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:20, Reply)
with the pork, so you get a juxtaposition of textures

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:21, Reply)
That's a good point.
Best til last, though.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:21, Reply)
Half the chips go in the burger at McDonalds, along with a about 3/4 of a pot of sweet'n'sour.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:23, Reply)
Nasty.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:24, Reply)
this is gonz, his food diary reads like that of a blind autist with no taste buds

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:25, Reply)
True story, I made a soup last night and put doritos chili heatwave crisps (with melted emmingtile) in it.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:26, Reply)
like ready made croutons

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:28, Reply)
For the soup I was having, it worked perfecly, the flavour was well lush.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:30, Reply)
When was the last time you tried it?

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:25, Reply)
I try to avoid McDonalds.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:26, Reply)
as do I, vile places

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:27, Reply)
Do you have or you haven't tried it?

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:29, Reply)
I've never put chips in with a burger. It seems silly, I like crispyness on my chips when I dip them in sauce.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:30, Reply)
They're rarely 'crisp' in McDs anyway.
Trust me, it'll open your world.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:32, Reply)
Your question doesn't make sense, making it impossible for me to answer it.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:30, Reply)
Typo.... "So you...."

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:31, Reply)
No I haven't tried.
I also haven't tried having sex with a puma, but I know I wouldn't like it.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:34, Reply)
It's a good thing Miss Battered isn't so ridged or you'd never have gotten a go.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:42, Reply)
She likes it rigid alright.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:47, Reply)
Battered is the only other man on the planet who I know who share my love of Tarama and Salted Kettle Crisps.
I don't know why he fights me on this one, when he's just as food-mental as me.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:54, Reply)
Yes, but a lot of your culinary ideas are just wrong.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:57, Reply)
"non-traditional"

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:58, Reply)
oh no, there is not room for relativism here.
it's either right or it's wrong

usually wrong
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:00, Reply)
Well you certainly won't read about them in La Rousse Gastronomique or Escoffier.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:01, Reply)
Non Conformist.
One day I'll tell you about the fish finger, mash potato, baked beens and fried egg volcano.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:01, Reply)
You've got to experiment.
I was a bit stoned when I made my lunch last night and it turned out that I made myself an old favourite from my teens - a marmite and honey sandwich.
Still good.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:09, Reply)
Marmite and honey?
*bleurgh*
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:10, Reply)
It sounds wrong, but is so right.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:22, Reply)
Can you do this with more upscale burgers Gonz?

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:44, Reply)
well obviously you 'can', I mean 'should'

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:44, Reply)
As long as the chips are fries and there is no carbohydrate layer (eg, like the 'tower' in a 'tower burger' at KFC), then knock yourself out !

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:50, Reply)
alright gonz I'm back from lunch
had a normal burger (burger, tomato, sauce stuff, pickles, onion, lettuce) and I shoved some fries in

Was alright, didn't see that much difference tho
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:42, Reply)
Try shoving some chips up your cockend and shitting out a burger.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:43, Reply)
no wonder you don't eat meat if that's how you think it's made

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:45, Reply)
how classy a burger would you rate it
before and after?
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:53, Reply)
I once went to a toby carvery and they didn't have any crackling.
I truley knew, at that moment, what it was like to be jewish.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:22, Reply)
Crackling is shit
bitter, hairy, fat.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:29, Reply)

Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong,
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:31, Reply)
Bitch, please.
Next you'll be telling me bone marrow is disgusting?
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:37, Reply)
Have you had the bone marrow starter at Hawksmoor?

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:40, Reply)
Had it? I fucking wrote it, mate.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:42, Reply)
All over swipe's face?

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:44, Reply)
Too right.
Slag.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:45, Reply)
I told my Mrs that joke the other day.
Bad idea.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:55, Reply)
Try her on "Play a jazz chord"

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:56, Reply)
I think it is safe to say that most of you are fucking nuts.
And that nearly everyone will focus in on any mention of food in a thread and then argue vociferously about it.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:22, Reply)
vegeterian shitcunt mouth wrong

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:24, Reply)
I find a meat injection cures vegetarianism.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:34, Reply)
are you offering to bugger tangles?

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:42, Reply)
That is how it reads.
Slightly unnerving.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:44, Reply)
I don't know what that last word means without looking it up.
I don't need to freign inteligence by using verbal complextities to give creedance to an absord statement.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:53, Reply)
Thanks for clearing that up Gonz.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:03, Reply)
There's something I can't see, that means I have to turn off / look away from that thing happening.
Not gonna say 'cus some cunt will post pictures of it all the time, but it happens on telly at least once a week.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:25, Reply)
Is it Stunned's mum on the granny porn channel?

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:26, Reply)
Sister.
She had a very long paper round.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:28, Reply)
Is it someone using the bathroom for a normal amount of time?

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:30, Reply)
Is it people eating?
Sneezing
People in hospital
Blood?
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:55, Reply)
People in hospital beds

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:00, Reply)
I too like the pub.
In fact I'm there now, just been to a funeral and we're eating butties and planning on some serious drinking.
4 fucking people I know have died in the past few months. 4 ffs. Who next? How do you want your funeral to go? I want "I hate people" by the Anti Nowhere League" played at mine. Or something by the Toy Dolls.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:34, Reply)
Anything by The Pet Shop Boys or Erasure should do you quite nicely?

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:44, Reply)
Or Liberarce

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:46, Reply)
Or Danny La Rue.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:48, Reply)
Or Larry Grayson

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:48, Reply)
Or Elton John.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:51, Reply)
Or George Michael

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:51, Reply)
Or John Inman.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:54, Reply)
Slightly concerned that others may be judging us both based on the knowledge demonstrated in this sub thread.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:55, Reply)
Or Ricky Martin.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:56, Reply)
Or all of the Arsenal football team.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:56, Reply)
But especially Sol Campbell.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:57, Reply)
Poor bloke. Imaging being born a darkie AND a nancy.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 12:58, Reply)
He likes nothing more than stroking Roberto Di Matteo's inner gusset.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:01, Reply)
I am going to several pubs tonight.
I am going to them with a girl with a nice bottom.

Telling the internet important news, right here.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:00, Reply)
is it just me that reads this and mentally translates "nice bottom" to "no tits"?
in the same way as "smashing personality" = "fat"
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:02, Reply)
Nope.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:03, Reply)
I think also "braying cretin" is a given.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:04, Reply)
*snorts*

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:05, Reply)
I don't break down the beauty of a woman at all, they're not just body parts you know, they're a whole person.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:04, Reply)
Until 11pm

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:05, Reply)
LOL

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:05, Reply)
No, PC.
Women are squaws and they are to be fucked.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:05, Reply)
he brought up the individual body part.
it wasn't a value judgement, while I love tits I'd take small tits and a nice arse over big tits and a crap arse. I'd also prefer a fat girl with a nice personality, but then I am both gay and a hippy.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:07, Reply)
And you're gay.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:33, Reply)
As good as yours?

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:03, Reply)
A pub crawl. How romantic.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:04, Reply)
Hah, yeah, if you want romance, take a stripper to a Travelodge.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:32, Reply)
I'm going for a viewing tonight.
Who wants to judge the place?
www.zoopla.co.uk/to-rent/details/15131798
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:02, Reply)
Flat looks great but it is very "near" to everything
The patio doors seem to open onto the street. Is it busy?
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:04, Reply)
Nah, it's at the end off a side road.
There's a cyclepath nearby but that's about it.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:05, Reply)
That might be OK then

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:05, Reply)
Plenty of strangling room.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:07, Reply)
The technical term is elbow room
or dismemberment chamber
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:09, Reply)
dungeon

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:12, Reply)
Or 'where I like to spend Saturday nights'

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:14, Reply)
I wouldn't want to live next to a psychopath.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:14, Reply)
I don't think I could live in MK
I was going to ask if they didn't have any nice, old, houses there and then realised of course they don't.

I'm not sure I could live in something less than 80 years old.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:05, Reply)
b3th agrees

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:05, Reply)
They have plenty from the villages we've annexed.
And stony Stratford is full of them. But they're stupidly expensive. Not really available to rent though.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:06, Reply)
I can see why they would be.
I was more pointing out my own silliness than critisising.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:08, Reply)
Here you go, change from a million.
www.zoopla.co.uk/for-sale/details/17463057?search_identifier=b9d8c809ec6ffea56461882b1a2be96d
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:11, Reply)
Have those pictures had some really bad photoshop work done on them?
Or is the sky really that weird in Milton Keynes?
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:12, Reply)
it looks like a really halfarsed HDR photo
which look awful anyway
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:56, Reply)
I think you should definitely rent this place if it is still available.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:06, Reply)
Only went on the market yesterday.
I can't get a viewing until 6 though, and there's a "few other viewings today"
Which could be Estate agent bullshit to be honest.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:08, Reply)
Seems reasonable, cost wise

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:08, Reply)
£200 fees though
and 6 week deposit and month up front means just about £2k to get the keys.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:08, Reply)
Thats about normal though, isn't it?

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:13, Reply)
ITS NOT NICE THOUGH IS IT!

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:19, Reply)
Thanks "Whitney Houston"

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:29, Reply)
Anyone from London kicking around?
What's hackney like as an area? need a hotel for march bash, found one quite cheap,I just don't want to get mugged.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:09, Reply)
soz it's gonna happen you may as well accept that now

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:09, Reply)
I gather it's a bit of a shithole.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:12, Reply)
RE hotel is OK and a bit cheaper at the weekends.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:13, Reply)
doesn't that guy on /board run one?
he'll give you a discount if you mention the phrase 'riverghost fucks animals'
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:59, Reply)
it only has one bedroom and you wanted two?
also not verfy private
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:09, Reply)
Yeah, but it is very big.
I won't jump on it, but if it's nice I'll see.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:12, Reply)
It's all about the lebensraum.

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:18, Reply)
I prefer the term sitting room

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:28, Reply)
Didn't realise it was so expensive to rent in MK

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:10, Reply)
I think we're done here.
New one please.
(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:32, Reply)
YEAH!

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:43, Reply)
HOW DOES EVERYONE EAT DESSERT?

(, Fri 25 Jan 2013, 13:59, Reply)

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