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Whoever Jake Benson is, he's on the ball
Rather swift auto-tune response to the tongue-tied Grammies reporter. (By the way we're all allowed to laugh now we know she wasn't having a strokle, she's just a bit shit!)
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Leemondus, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 0:28,
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f*cking autotune.
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JamTallons, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 8:23,
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The clap-off bra
Ron the seal!
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Happosai _,,,,_(O ; o)_,,,, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 0:27,
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I'd be in trouble at a gig.
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Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 0:45,
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It's ok to be a cat guy.
You can all come out the closet now.
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Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:47,
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love!
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chocolatelemming, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:57,
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i already have
www.b3ta.com/board/10336108
(just kidding. im straight)
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FIEND, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 0:05,
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You are clearly a cat lover.
It's written all over your chest fiendy. :-)
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Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 0:41,
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are you really?
*looks sceptical*
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tickle I was away, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 0:45,
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But I like being in the closet
Just under the stairs...
We have some nice shoes in there...
And some boxes with stuff in...
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Darklord, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 0:06,
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Shhhh
get back under the stairs you. *pokes with a broom*
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Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 0:42,
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He's so manly.
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sandcracker is eh, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 8:56,
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Inspector Drake
Low budget British independent film. I trololololed at this trailer for a long time.
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MarmedukePrott, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:22,
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who actually types
trolololol without making themselves look like a massive twat?
also: that film looks like a shit english naked gun with added shit.
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FIEND, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:41,
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No one Vodkafiend
NO ONE.
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Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:44,
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My word there's a lot of hostility flying about. Do you want to get something off your chest darling or is it just handbags at dawn?
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MarmedukePrott, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 0:42,
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that's just something a massive twat would say.
or a perfectly reasonable person.
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tickle I was away, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 0:46,
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There's no need for that!
you perfectly reasonable person you.
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Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 0:54,
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you mean Johnny English don't you?
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Canazza is mostly listening to Yes, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 10:19,
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The King's Rap
I made this!
I spent Valentine's Day making this. Yes, amazingly, I am single.
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B3tan Housewife, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 22:55,
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WOO to the muther funkin' YAY!
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Kung_Fu_Russ ran out of amusing signatures on, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 22:58,
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Stop the internet - we have a winnar :D
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witty_ditty has made multiple miaows since, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 22:58,
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Brilliant!
An a very happy valentines day!
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Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 22:59,
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Oh; stop being so good Dan.
You are annoying me now.
Click.
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TheSundaeLunch I'm a fucking shrub, alright?, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:02,
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I think it's less to do with skill than sheer obsessive compulsiveness and nothing better to do with my time...
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B3tan Housewife, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:07,
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I still tell people i sort of know you
and every reply validates it. Don't worry though, i'd make a shit stalker.
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TheSundaeLunch I'm a fucking shrub, alright?, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:17,
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Nice!
Great job
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Just Juan Cornetto will take you to the lo-rider show n' flaunt ya on, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:03,
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Superb stuff!
More rap should be set to classical music. I bet there's more but I really am not good with music/poetry.
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Christian's Bolt and Ski, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:05,
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ha!
I knew what that would be before i clicked it.
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Kung_Fu_Russ ran out of amusing signatures on, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:09,
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That is cracking too
Although he was extremely hard to follow. Thanks!
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Christian's Bolt and Ski, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:13,
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:D
I like this one: www.youtube.com/watch?v=36Xt-XeWnHM
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witty_ditty has made multiple miaows since, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:16,
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This is clearly an unofficial remix but it's sublime nonetheless: www.youtube.com/watch?v=9jumopYHTTw
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B3tan Housewife, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:17,
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Ain't no school like the old school :)
edit: oooh, biggie vs bach, seems to work better than I thought :)
www.youtube.com/watch?v=qOWvOEd5FZc
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witty_ditty has made multiple miaows since, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:21,
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is that a stoned Jake Gyllenhaal on beats?
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Holly Would long wheel based tranny, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:19,
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That's a bit good.
Nicely!
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Tivert, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:11,
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this is tops
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benito vaselini no not that one, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:09,
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The last line earned the click
alone, much better than the last rap about stuttering I heard. ;)
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Holly Would long wheel based tranny, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:12,
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^
What he said. Nice one!
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Turquoise Hexagon Sun has just dropped acid on, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 0:01,
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Great stuff.
But more importantly, I just got what your username's all about. At first I thought it was a cutesy quirky thing. But no.
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blindmelon, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:26,
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do tell.
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Kung_Fu_Russ ran out of amusing signatures on, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:28,
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I didn't even realize there was a joke in it.
Now it's as clear as black and blue to me.
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I am a cucumber. Save me, Popobawa!, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 1:55,
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Ha...
Oh, I get it. Fucking hell. How slow of me.
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Kung_Fu_Russ ran out of amusing signatures on, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 7:54,
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Nice
Clicks Hard
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Darklord, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 0:09,
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P...p...p...perfect
Wonderful stuff, my heartiest clicks to you sir.
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Leemondus, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 0:10,
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heh heh heh.
stop... heh heh heh.
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tickle I was away, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 0:36,
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Fuck off. That was brilliant.
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I am a cucumber. Save me, Popobawa!, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 1:52,
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Have a click sir, brilliant
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ERG1008 is climbing in yo windows & snatchin yo people up, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 9:30,
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Simply the best thing I've seen on the interwebs in months.
You am awesome!
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Hitler's Barber Soylent Green is high in saturated fat, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 20:58,
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do do do do......do do.....do do
can't touch this!
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jojo the majic clown, Fri 18 Feb 2011, 16:47,
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Looks like the gentleman rhymer has a new pretender to his crown...
FIRTH GONNA GET WHOOP-ASSSED
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mr_chopper pluggin' up yo' plopper, Fri 18 Feb 2011, 16:49,
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Arcade what?
2 good friends, whose opinions I would otherwise respect, both recommended arcade fire. I just don't get it though, I don't find their music fun or interesting. Am I all alone?
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Just Juan Cornetto will take you to the lo-rider show n' flaunt ya on, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 22:35,
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I like them very much
saw them live recently and it was incredible.
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Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 22:54,
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You're not helping
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Just Juan Cornetto will take you to the lo-rider show n' flaunt ya on, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:02,
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I don't want you to feel all alone on valentines day Juany
Arcade Fire are Shit. No one should listen to them, they rot your ears off then your brain melts out the holes. Rubbish.
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Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:12,
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Haha, yeah, thought so
Losers
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Just Juan Cornetto will take you to the lo-rider show n' flaunt ya on, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:14,
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I'm a latecomer to them.
Heard Neon Bible for the first time last year and thought it was unbelievably good. To me they sound how the Pixies would sound if they'd spent their formative years listening to Rufus Wainwright. If that makes any sense.
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blindmelon, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:25,
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Apart from the time travel aspect
yes, it does.
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RedHouse over yonder, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 4:05,
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What?
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bogus official shove it up your cunt, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 22:38,
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Well, I liked it. Long story short: Butthurt Gaga fans.
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Zappanale, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 22:45,
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I was enjoying this earlier
Christ, if you haven't even *heard of* Arcade Fire then you really can't claim to know anything at all about popular music. I don't know, maybe they're really tiny in the USA or something?
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aramando, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:30,
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Merkins allow anything in from Canada.
'DON'T allow' I meant...damn it.
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Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:40,
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Do I have to write you a list?
nah, bindun
"Blame Canada, Blame Canada..."
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RedHouse over yonder, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 4:02,
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I was blaming Merkins
for not liking Canadians, you adorable little Canadian you.
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Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 9:57,
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The Amazing Spider-Man
Your first, mahoosive hi-res glimpse of the new Spidey.
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Captain Howdy, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 22:29,
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that texture reminds me of a golf ball
is this Spider Man 4?
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Mehitabel_Itrang, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 22:48,
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The reboot of the franchise - official title is "The Amazing Spider-Man"
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Captain Howdy, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 8:35,
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They're rebooting the franchise?
After just 9 years and three films? Did they run out of ideas that quickly?
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evil_andy Stick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 10:09,
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no, Spidey 3 was just shit
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Canazza is mostly listening to Yes, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 10:20,
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Luckiest guy alive - (filmed in 1999)
Australian heart attack victim Bill Morgan wins a $27,000 car on a
scratchcard, local news sends a camera crew to film a card purchase
re-enactment, and..........
Older than the internets, but what the hell :-D.....Report here.
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Stashie is plotting against his blender on, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 22:11,
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hah, beautiful
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Jimmers, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 22:27,
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Aww
Must have something in my eye
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Just Juan Cornetto will take you to the lo-rider show n' flaunt ya on, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 22:53,
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jammy cnut
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Leemondus, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 0:12,
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Jesus
christ.
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OneForTheRoad man under glass, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 0:00,
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The Daily Fail again.
In response to Melanie Phillips atrocious article about Homosexual marriages here: istyosty.com/b8s (this link stops the Daily Fail from receiving any income from advertisements), B3ta's own Gonzo ( www.b3ta.com/users/profile.php?id=12899 ) has written this article.
Thought I'd share it with you all.
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Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 21:54,
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That picture of David 1/2-way down the page (http://istyosty.com/b8s)...
somebody GNOPS'ed that just a bit, didn't they?
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PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 22:08,
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she invokes the bible four times in that article.
Which considering she's not even a christian is quite a few.
Also, what a reactionary fucking bitch.
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benito vaselini no not that one, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 22:09,
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It's pretty appaling journalism.
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Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 22:20,
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Great linky, I fucking hate melanie phillips. She is a total cunt. (I cant be bothered to articulate my vitriol beyond cursing, the cunt doesnt deverve it.)
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McCrack, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 22:14,
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I was not aware of Coll3tive, a nice idea
Liked the post, too.
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Holly Would long wheel based tranny, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 22:19,
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Whilst I enjoy...
...seeing religious types getting outraged, I can't help but wonder why homosexual people would want to take part in a religious ceremony of an organisation that ultimately preaches that they're going to burn in hell?
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Megamoss, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 8:37,
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I tend to agree
And we need to separate the issues of church and state. I'm an atheist, but still believe in religious freedom, even when I think it's horribly, visciously wrong. So the religions can decide whether to hold marriage services of any flavour they like - and shouldn't be compelled to do otherwise. BUT, whether the state validates these weddings in law, or to provide different flavours of civil service, is a whole other matter - and frankly should be up to the democratic process, and nowt to do with the religionists.
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nameleft has bought a new telescope, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 8:56,
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There was a very good article on religion and gay marriage
by John Shore: johnshore.com/2010/10/01/how-is-being-gay-like-gluing-wings-on-a-pig/
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admiral crunch holds the newsreader's nose squarely, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 15:00,
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All that Lives May Love
I made this!
Hippy Valentines Stuff and the like...
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freyamoon Submit!, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 21:03,
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Be you tee full . . . love the moves . . . Hippy Valintimes !
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Valin I changed glasses while I wasn't looking, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 21:56,
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Ready for Mt. Everest
Training in the snow. Little dog doing his best.
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dunga, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 20:59,
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I know you're trying to turn your dog into the next phenomenon
but it's really not working.
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morrybyte made a subtle namechange at, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 21:15,
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Youns mum is the next phenomenonmeneonemneonmszz
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Firkinfedup last shat on your wife's tits at, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 21:19,
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Boo boo
boo doo boo.
Phenomenon.
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ClungePlunger I drink Sambuca on the rocks and bloody like it!, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 23:37,
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Unfortunate valentines.
RS
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TownsendsPublisher is all gravy baby, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 19:59,
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Good find
My favourite of these: capnwacky.com/valentines/valcard8.html
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Extinct Jesus Dossier "...I think it counteracts Hitler's magic...", Mon 14 Feb 2011, 21:54,
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Ha! Nicely :)
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Jorvic, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 21:59,
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it's a shame he's not funny anymore.
his delivery reminds me of roy chubby brown
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benito vaselini no not that one, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 21:06,
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I know what you mean...
On Mock the Week it was alright, because his cuntish interjections were split up by different material from the other panellists, but on his own he's just boring and depressing.
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Extinct Jesus Dossier "...I think it counteracts Hitler's magic...", Mon 14 Feb 2011, 21:52,
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totally
Boyle's material's cleverer than Chubby Brown's but not by that much.
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Leemondus, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 0:17,
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It's ok to laugh!
Heavy Burtations!!!
CBS (the channel she works for!) says she was fine.
Edit:
More info -
latimesblogs.latimes.com/showtracker/2011/02/kcbs-reporter-serene-branson-tells-her-bosses-shes-feeling-fine.html
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Kung_Fu_Russ ran out of amusing signatures on, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 18:58,
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she is suffering from hearing aids
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mutated monty, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 19:21,
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I caught that from listening to Freddie Mercury too loud
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gaijintendo Regular Member, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 19:31,
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Maybe
she had a migraine? My friend does that when he has one.
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..wil, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 19:51,
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glad she's fine
now we can mock her until the end of time :D
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HappyToast Groat froth, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 19:56,
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Woohoo!
Bang, and the guilt is gone
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SnowyTheWereRabbit the Leporid from Hell, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 20:56,
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She's pissed :o)
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cockneydevil is full of bacony goodness, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 21:14,
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So it was just the blondeness?
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Jazzspasm, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 21:39,
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Yes!!! it is HERE!!!!!!
![](http://www.bitterwallet.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/12061__36696_zoom-500x500.jpg)
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Spin Its a thing., Mon 14 Feb 2011, 18:52,
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better than
the other way around
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beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 20:36,
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hehehe
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Jazzspasm, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 21:39,
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this sort of stuff has been around for ages
for dogs
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spesh., Mon 14 Feb 2011, 20:51,
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The muzzle man - Flea market
I made this!
we were on the flea market buying compact cassettes when a horse showed up from nowhere. luckily we had our trusty baking tray with us.
we saved the day
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kingafkong, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 18:44,
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I love this.
This is the best thing that has happened today.
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IHaveABadFeelingAboutThis most likely working from home on, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 18:50,
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Double SPANG?!
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Bourbon Fox Bourbon is a moron, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 19:16,
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WHAT DOES IT MEAN?!
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Extinct Jesus Dossier "...I think it counteracts Hitler's magic...", Mon 14 Feb 2011, 21:59,
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fuck
these are good and I don't know why!
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Roxon, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 20:15,
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I want a horse head
And i want it now!
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Sean Connery made your mom damp, Mon 14 Feb 2011, 22:11,
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Lovin this one!
Nice to hear you keeping the "HULLOO" in there as well :D
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Three Dog Man, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 10:59,
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^ This
Makes me laugh every time
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ERG1008 is climbing in yo windows & snatchin yo people up, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 12:52,
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we are currently in making of many many more of these. suggestions for locations are welcome!
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kingafkong, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 12:10,
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electrocution seems to be in vogue
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Ravenous Bugblatter Beast This content may not be working. Please try again., Fri 18 Feb 2011, 20:21,
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Hahaha!
Makes me laugh far too much :D
How about doing one at... let's say.. a train station? Strip club? Bank? I DON'T KNOW STOP PRESSURING ME AAAGHHHH!
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thick as a brick I think a no, I mean a yes, but it's all wrong, Tue 15 Feb 2011, 16:55,
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Stripclub, brilliant idea!
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mortenholthe, Tue 8 Mar 2011, 13:23,
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Ahahahahahahaha
SPANG
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boyo81 was laying down his ordinance on, Wed 16 Feb 2011, 14:50,
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Is this in Grünerlokka in Oslo?
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mattcoxonline is currently Offline., Fri 18 Feb 2011, 21:00,
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yes it is. at the flea market at Birkelunden
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kingafkong, Sat 19 Feb 2011, 11:16,
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oh .. nice
.. didn't recognize it. We spent some years in suburban Oslo and every so often my wife would make me go there .. charming part of town but flea markets were never my kind of thing :-)
And nice work BTW!
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spinoza, Mon 21 Feb 2011, 10:21,
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Aww
I feel bad for the paraplegic pony. Not so much the other one, though. He had it coming.
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evillttlimp is a Ladytron. No seriously she has a suit., Mon 21 Feb 2011, 9:05,
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