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This is a link post Postcards from a more enlightened age
Let's face it, giving them the vote hasn't achieved much has it?
 (I helped save b3ta! TownsendsPublisher is all gravy baby, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:41, Reply)
This is a normal post Cool link - was only listening to a podcast about these postcards the other day!

(pissflaps. FSPW, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:52, Reply)
This is a normal post It helps share the blame I suppose.

(I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 19:33, Reply)
This is a link post Are images of fisting 'extreme pornography'? The Crown Prosecution Service think so and are trying to get a jury to say it is today in court.
Follow it live on twitter all week:

https://mobile.twitter.com/#!/search/%23porntrial
 (pissflaps. FSPW, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:27, Reply)
This is a normal post Depends what you are fisting surely, vets fist cows all the time. Dirty bastards, it's incrdible how quickly cows get
pregnant from fisting too, I heard of a vet that fisted a cow once and a calf came out 30 seconds later, so it is probably better than IVF. Do you think I should testify?
 (I helped save b3ta! skeltonator Needs some new daps., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:31, Reply)
This is a normal post you can't fist a cow and get it pregnant so that it has a calf....
thats what happens when you kick it in the cunt.
 (DefyingDarwin Old, untalented and white,, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:43, Reply)
This is a normal post Sheesh really? do you need to stand on a chair first?

(I helped save b3ta! skeltonator Needs some new daps., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 18:15, Reply)
This is a normal post heaven forbid that someone sees it and blushes

(augsav forgot about B3ta, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:31, Reply)
This is a normal post Depends. I'd say past the elbow is extreme, others might say
it's not 'til your up to the shoulder.

It should be a jury of ventriloquists deciding.
 (Paper 'n Pencil Thirst is excellent, even better than I hoped, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:33, Reply)
This is a normal post most Hollywood films are full of images that'll result in serious injury if copied
but yeah the link hints at dark forces out to destroy Simon Walsh - who knows?
 (I helped save b3ta! rob, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:35, Reply)
This is a normal post So...
Does anybody know who at the CPS I need to send all my porn to so that they can check if any of it is deemed 'disgusting' or 'extreme'? I assume they'll be covering the postage ;)
 (legoman82, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:39, Reply)
This is a normal post
pissflaps,
Rose Court,
2 Southwark Bridge,
London,
SE1 9HS
 (I helped save b3ta! TownsendsPublisher is all gravy baby, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:42, Reply)
This is a normal post LMFAO
I'll be seeing you in the showers then I guess
 (legoman82, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:45, Reply)
This is a normal post Not if he sees you first!

(I helped save b3ta! skeltonator Needs some new daps., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 18:18, Reply)
This is a normal post If my porn isn't "disgusting" or "extreme", I want my money back.
*may not have paid for it*
 (I helped save b3ta! MyFrontFellOff ; his mouth full of teddies, urinating defiantly, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:49, Reply)
This is a normal post They seem to have the situation in hand.

(I helped save b3ta! JamTallons, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:48, Reply)
This is a link post loose hairy sneezes I made this!
they always come in 3's for me
(cheebatv, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:23, Reply)
This is a normal post What happened to your face-tattoo?

(Paper 'n Pencil Thirst is excellent, even better than I hoped, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:34, Reply)
This is a normal post ha ha! :)

(Spin Its a thing., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:55, Reply)
This is a normal post How is Olive Oil?

(pissflaps. FSPW, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:47, Reply)
This is a normal post I broke her
Had to happen
 (cheebatv, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 19:35, Reply)
This is a normal post Fisting?

(pissflaps. FSPW, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 19:45, Reply)
This is a normal post I heard about your trouble with Moses, I can't believe he went to mount Olive!
Dirty bastard.
 (I helped save b3ta! skeltonator Needs some new daps., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 19:46, Reply)
This is a normal post I hope you don't work in catering, if you do I am never asking for pepper ever again.

(I helped save b3ta! skeltonator Needs some new daps., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 18:17, Reply)
This is a link post Olympic sponsor protection goes over the top I made this!
Hope it's Chips
Don't be put off by the sign. Press the play button!
(I helped save b3ta! beaubodor blogless, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:19, Reply)
This is a normal post :D Brilliant!

(I helped save b3ta! skeltonator Needs some new daps., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:24, Reply)
This is a normal post :-DD Brilliant! Brilliant!

(pissflaps. FSPW, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:49, Reply)
This is a normal post Lulz!

(I helped save b3ta! simbosan is too tired, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:51, Reply)
This is a normal post Killed by LOCOG already
LOCOGaC
 (I helped save b3ta! TownsendsPublisher is all gravy baby, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 18:21, Reply)
This is a normal post ^^this^^

(I helped save b3ta! Pig Bodine., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 19:02, Reply)
This is a normal post Hey PB yes they were flaming hot flavour!!!
Have you watched beau's video yet? just try clicking play!
 (I helped save b3ta! skeltonator Needs some new daps., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 19:11, Reply)
This is a normal post Hahahah - brill vid.
*Flaming Hot high fives*
 (I helped save b3ta! Pig Bodine., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 19:57, Reply)
This is a normal post *high five*

(I helped save b3ta! skeltonator Needs some new daps., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 20:00, Reply)
This is a normal post My fucking attention sp

(I helped save b3ta! TownsendsPublisher is all gravy baby, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 8:16, Reply)
This is a link post Werner Herzog Reads Mike Mulligan And His Steam Shovel
Don't disillusion your children. This is the only way to prepare them for reality.
(I helped save b3ta! cowcat Bituminous squeegee, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:08, Reply)
This is a normal post
*Shit impersonator of Werner Herzog Reads Mike Mulligan And His Steam Shovel
 (loci, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:15, Reply)
This is a link post Lego Recreation of the hour long sit down protest from the Olympic Fencing
(Guardian link) I reckon this is their best Lego recreation yet. Doesn't look like I can embed their freaky in house video though. Note: Contains Traces of Stormtroopers.
 (I helped save b3ta! DinivanX Has stinging piss after drinking Pact Coffee, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:57, Reply)
This is a link post Roller Suit Man
I would like to do this, although I would almost certainly die in the process.
(The Tramp Surveyor, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:45, Reply)
This is a normal post WANT A GO

(I helped save b3ta! Lord Keeps meaning to procrastinate., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:51, Reply)
This is a normal post Master Chief invents environmentally friendly mode of transport

(I helped save b3ta! h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:58, Reply)
This is a normal post I would like to try that in a giant St Barnados spiral collection box with something soft at the bottom.

(I helped save b3ta! skeltonator Needs some new daps., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:07, Reply)
This is a link post Death by horse sex

(PhosphorBurnedEyes Swastika Shop opening here soon, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:21, Reply)
This is a normal post Its a fecking epidemic, I tells ya!!

(Spin Its a thing., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:36, Reply)
This is a normal post Before anyone asks it wasn't me.

(pissflaps. FSPW, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:41, Reply)
This is a normal post Certificate of Assassination!
Haha.
 (Paper 'n Pencil Thirst is excellent, even better than I hoped, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:38, Reply)
This is a normal post Time to start a band called Horse Sex
First single,Death
 (I helped save b3ta! simbosan is too tired, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:54, Reply)
This is a link post Police try to find young caller
I find this very odd; When I ring for a pizza they only want my door number; they seem to have all the other details already just from my number. What am I missing?
 (I helped save b3ta! TheSundaeLunch I'm a fucking shrub, alright?, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:09, Reply)
This is a normal post someone calling from a recently bought pay as you go mobile?
although they should be able to roughly triangulate position by which phone masts the signal was going through

edit: also caller ID can be turned off. A quick google says you can do this on an iPhone (for example) by hunting through the menus.
 (I helped save b3ta! rob, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:12, Reply)
This is a normal post That only works when the destination is civilian

(I helped save b3ta! Lord Keeps meaning to procrastinate., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:44, Reply)
This is a normal post I remember prefixing the number you were calling with 191 used to stop giving away your caller ID
dunno if it still works though.
 (I helped save b3ta! mr.dogshit The world's premier anthropomorphic canine faeces, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:50, Reply)
This is a normal post Just been on the news that it was a hoax

(I helped save b3ta! h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:40, Reply)
This is a normal post Jesus wept.
I give up on this species.
 (I helped save b3ta! TheSundaeLunch I'm a fucking shrub, alright?, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:44, Reply)
This is a normal post So did Jesus.
I know about these things.
 (I helped save b3ta! Extinct Jesus Dossier "...I think it counteracts Hitler's magic...", Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:47, Reply)
This is a normal post It was a ten year old

(I helped save b3ta! yanmania... last shagged your mum on, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:02, Reply)
This is a normal post Haven't the police got better things to do than make prank calls?

(pissflaps. FSPW, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:06, Reply)
This is a normal post What, like apprehend dirty broadband thieves?

(I helped save b3ta! skeltonator Needs some new daps., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 18:52, Reply)
This is a normal post Yes, they are pure scum.

(pissflaps. FSPW, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 19:16, Reply)
This is a normal post Hem Hem... Indeed.

(I helped save b3ta! skeltonator Needs some new daps., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 19:32, Reply)
This is a link post current FP pic on the standard
note file name.
 (hotpiss is very much liking your popping musics, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:58, Reply)
This is a normal post upskirting is an Olympic sport now?

(I helped save b3ta! rob, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:02, Reply)
This is a normal post It should be

(I helped save b3ta! redazril I LIKE DRUGS!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:03, Reply)
This is a normal post Yeah, then i wouldn't have to go sign that register each week.

(I helped save b3ta! Dawn Of The Bread $$$$ E-THUG 4 LIFE - THAT'S HOW I SCROLL $$$$, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:05, Reply)
This is a normal post We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking up the skirts of stars

(I helped save b3ta! rob, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:05, Reply)
This is a normal post That just depends
on how seriously you take it.
 (I helped save b3ta! DinivanX Has stinging piss after drinking Pact Coffee, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:04, Reply)
This is a normal post

(hotpiss is very much liking your popping musics, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:21, Reply)
This is a normal post I didn't even know it was a verb!

(I helped save b3ta! The Coast Of Yemen, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:33, Reply)
This is a normal post Sure is
it's called tennis
 (UTB, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:06, Reply)
This is a normal post Just cut through the shit and watch the volleyball.

(I helped save b3ta! skeltonator Needs some new daps., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:11, Reply)
This is a normal post Fuck it just wach some porn.

(I helped save b3ta! skeltonator Needs some new daps., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:18, Reply)
This is a link post Kill List - the musical
"Everbody Needs a Hammer"

A friend of mine has, with some colleagues, put together an entry for the Film Four Scene Stealers Competition 2012. It's rather woo.
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:55, Reply)
This is a normal post That should be an extra on the DVD.
Ace film and a splendid parody. The costumes made me chortle.
 (I helped save b3ta! sir_spicious2000 Crap I've watched: www.filmplop.blogspot.com/, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:19, Reply)
This is a normal post pfft
very good
 (I helped save b3ta! mutated monty, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:29, Reply)
This is a link post Sea Hag kills man for not offering beer tribute.
I just read the copy, folks.


 (I helped save b3ta! BrokenCoccyx doesn't mind if you grope on, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:43, Reply)
This is a normal post The bastard child of Les Dawson and Peter Stringfellow

(I helped save b3ta! mr.dogshit The world's premier anthropomorphic canine faeces, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:49, Reply)
This is a normal post haha

(I helped save b3ta! Brandy_Bumwinkle, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:50, Reply)
This is a normal post Holy shit!
haha
 (I helped save b3ta! --- ---, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:09, Reply)
This is a normal post Argh its Vigo the Carpathian!

(I helped save b3ta! DinivanX Has stinging piss after drinking Pact Coffee, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:00, Reply)
This is a normal post FEARS!
GB2 shit me up when I was little because of him, oh and that scary ass'ed motherfucking ghost with the pushchair.

To the back of the sofa!
 (I helped save b3ta! retrofly How about a link to a picture of something funny.., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:09, Reply)
This is a normal post VEY AM I DRIPPINGS VIV GOO?

(I helped save b3ta! h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:59, Reply)
This is a normal post

(Spin Its a thing., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:40, Reply)
This is a normal post
She looks like a sandpapered orangutang.
 (loci, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:22, Reply)
This is a link post Zerg Rush Baby
google thing
 (PhosphorBurnedEyes Swastika Shop opening here soon, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 14:21, Reply)
This is a normal post Heh
That's pretty cool, I was like "wtf's going on, oooooh"
 (I helped save b3ta! retrofly How about a link to a picture of something funny.., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:11, Reply)
This is a link post A robot you RIDE?
Is it gake and fay? I dunno but my word it's cool as fuck
(Leemondus, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 14:16, Reply)
This is a normal post Oooh
100 bb rounds per second to the face!
 (I helped save b3ta! Brandy_Bumwinkle, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 14:24, Reply)
This is a normal post thats insane
I've modded an M4 to do 40 and playing that doesn't make any friends. 100 a second would just look like you are poking a rod around the place.
 (Stonkwood Pipes made me do it, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:03, Reply)
This is a normal post What does any of that mean?

(pissflaps. FSPW, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:33, Reply)
This is a normal post It means you wouldn't stand a fucking chance in a BB gun fight against these two,
It also probably means that they don't have access to real guns. So they wouldnt stand a chance if you had a twelve bore for example.
 (I helped save b3ta! skeltonator Needs some new daps., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:15, Reply)
This is a normal post Aha! Spud guns!

(pissflaps. FSPW, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 18:24, Reply)
This is a normal post Its G and C too several times over
definitely fool as cuck tho
 (I helped save b3ta! simbosan is too tired, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 14:25, Reply)
This is a normal post Oh look
It's this week's glasscock

AGAIN
 (I helped save b3ta! Lord Keeps meaning to procrastinate., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 14:26, Reply)
This is a normal post I ordered one from their site
and all i got was this crappy email:

"Thank you very much for your order for “KURATAS” by Suidobashi Heavy Industry.
We certainly confirm your order below.We will contact you within a few days.

この度は水道橋重工KURATASをご注文いただきまして誠にありがとうございます。
以下の内容で承りました。
近日中に担当者よりご連絡差し上げます。
---------------------------
name:
KR01 Bubba

with:
iron crow / kuratas hand gun / artificial leather seat / drink holder

color:
COLOR5

price:
1,503,600 USD
---------------------------
[ ! ] CAUTION
"KURATAS" is an art piece.
It is not a normal vehicle, so it doesn't guarantee you safety and comfort.
However, it makes your dream of becoming a robot pilot comes true.

「クラタス」はアート作品です。
通常の乗り物と異なり、安全性・快適性は保障されませんが、
「ロボットパイロットになる」という人類の夢を保証します。

Suidobashi Heavy Industry



can someone loan me $1,503,600?
 (thatjoshguy is a robot., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 14:56, Reply)
This is a normal post They only come in color5?
I was hoping for color3, so that's a no sale.
 (I helped save b3ta! Brandy_Bumwinkle, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:03, Reply)
This is a normal post Only an artificial leather seat?
I'd want the real thing at that price mate. Kick up a fuss.
 (I helped save b3ta! ThunderThrust, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 18:56, Reply)
This is a normal post oh god, nobody tell moggy
she'll go on an rampage against bullies and lack of humanism
 (augsav forgot about B3ta, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 14:59, Reply)
This is a link post Taste of Asia
As good as it looks!
(something_exciting, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:52, Reply)
This is a normal post *stops at the caption frogs being eaten alive*

(I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:55, Reply)
This is a normal post
You missed the best part... the bit where the frog gets eaten alive
 (something_exciting, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 14:05, Reply)
This is a normal post As a confirmed carnivore
This is just fucking horrible and unnecessary. What kind of person wants to see their meal writhing and looking back up at them? It requires a pathological lack of empathy.

Not good. Not good at all.
 (North Utsira South Utsira, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 14:22, Reply)
This is a normal post you do realise that we are one of the very, very few large animals that don't do this every time they eat, right?
it's food, that's all, just food, and being eaten alive by us is no worse than being eaten alive by any of its other predators.
 (Ol' Ginger Bastard a role model for the children, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:04, Reply)
This is a normal post The fundamental difference is that 'we' have cognisance, and can actively choose not to inflict unnecessary suffering.

(I helped save b3ta! Tab Hunter Make this useless process end and so, begin again, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:14, Reply)
This is a normal post doesn't make any difference to the frog
he's just there being eaten alive by a predator, like all his mates in the wild will be. Could be worse, he could have been caught by a cat.
 (Ol' Ginger Bastard a role model for the children, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:17, Reply)
This is a normal post I believe myself to be better than an animal.
I tend not to mark my territory with excrement and don't propagate with rape.
 (I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:24, Reply)
This is a normal post Cats believe themselves to be better than you
who's to say who's right?
 (Ol' Ginger Bastard a role model for the children, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:28, Reply)
This is a normal post The one of us that can open a tin can.

(I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:30, Reply)
This is a normal post The fact that you're able to muse on the morality of "right" suggests I am.

(I helped save b3ta! Tab Hunter Make this useless process end and so, begin again, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:30, Reply)
This is a normal post you're missing out!

(hotpiss is very much liking your popping musics, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:41, Reply)
This is a normal post Succinctly stated
I concur elated.
 (I helped save b3ta! Brandy_Bumwinkle, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:19, Reply)
This is a normal post I'm with you on it being disgusting, but I think Mr. PollyWog was dead the second that huge knife severed it's backbone.
All we're seeing is residual nerve firings.

Still, bleeeeuurrgghh.
 (I helped save b3ta! BrokenCoccyx doesn't mind if you grope on, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:21, Reply)
This is a normal post I'd hardly call chopped up into cubes alive.

(I helped save b3ta! The Awful Puppy Bakery is still bored, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:18, Reply)
This is a normal post That was probably the most challenging masturbation session I've ever attempted.

(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:24, Reply)
This is a normal post Try it with your hands tied behind your back then!

(I helped save b3ta! mr.dogshit The world's premier anthropomorphic canine faeces, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:34, Reply)
This is a normal post idea for a tv show...
IRONWANK
 (hotpiss is very much liking your popping musics, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:42, Reply)
This is a normal post Hosted by Kriss Akabusi
AWOOGA!
 (I helped save b3ta! mr.dogshit The world's premier anthropomorphic canine faeces, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:54, Reply)
This is a normal post You made me do it!
Akabusi was uncomfortable unless he was wearing a pair of dungerees or stark bollock naked so he walked into the Jimmy Savile Row tailors with trepidation. He needed a new suit for a Tanni Gray Thompson testimonial he was speaking at.

"If you could slip out of your dungerees, Mr Akabluisi" entoned the fay tailor. "It's Akabusi" said Akabusi as his laugh filled the cluttered shop like an arsehole on creampie.com.

Kriss let the straps of his denim dungerees snap and the fabric rushed passed his polished espresso chassis leaving him standing naked. The rarefied air of the tailors brushed against his black and curlies like a fart in a tanga brief and for a moment he felt like a black Messiah.

"Miss. Portensa will measure you up" said the tailor as he disappeared out back for a tug and a weep.

Portensa strolled into the room and immediately Akabusi felt a twinge in his king size plonker. She was wearing a little black dress which he knew concealed a fantastic pair of tits and almost certainly a clunge so tight it shopped at Poundland.

"Just relax, Mr Abakuski, while I measure your inside leg" she said with a French accent richer than a Guinness sh*t. As Kriss felt the cold metal of the tape measure climb up his leg, he could feel his black boa fill with blood quicker than tampon on the first day.

Before he knew Miss Portensa was handling his growing concern like Pat Jennings. She pulled apart her dress to expose her smooth white skin, epic bristols and a fanny more hairy than Richard Keyes back.

He ploughed into her like a tighthead forward and plunged his now diamond hard cock into her like he was staking Dracula. Within hours it was over, Miss Portensa a useless pile of tit, minge and spunk and Akabusi panting and sweating like a multiple rapist.

Akabusi rolled up his mickey and pulled on his dungerees. "What about the suit Mr Abakusi?" breathed Portensa.

"f**k it. I'll wear me dungerees. It's only Tanni f**king Thompson" roared Akabusi as he bent down over her bloodless torso, whisphered "Awooga" in her ear and patted her on the fanny.
 (I helped save b3ta! skeltonator Needs some new daps., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:22, Reply)
This is a normal post Hahahaha!
I think I love you.

"Clunge so tight it shopped at poundland" pfft...
 (MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 19:13, Reply)
This is a normal post
There is something about the way he looks at you...

 (something_exciting, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:17, Reply)
This is a link post Afghanistan: 6 months in 2 minutes.

(pissflaps. FSPW, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:44, Reply)
This is a normal post That was more pleaseant than I gave you credit for.
Almost like a buddy movie.
 (I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:54, Reply)
This is a normal post 'And what do you do?'
'We kill people sir, and blow stuff up!'
Carry on....
 (I helped save b3ta! Brandy_Bumwinkle, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 14:11, Reply)
This is a normal post Lots of people and groups kill, doesn't make them bad people.
The ANC did some horrific stuff to people and now Mandelas a saint and the ANC rules the S.Africa.
 (I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 14:23, Reply)
This is a normal post but the ANC are horrible people...

(Ol' Ginger Bastard a role model for the children, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:07, Reply)
This is a normal post Learned about the ANC "necklacing" in school
Gave me the fear, big time.
 (I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:22, Reply)
This is a normal post thats a rather simplistic world view

(augsav forgot about B3ta, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 14:39, Reply)
This is a normal post It's a quote from an American soldier being interviewed by the BBC at the start of the war
so your observation is perfectly correct.
 (I helped save b3ta! Brandy_Bumwinkle, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 14:46, Reply)
This is a normal post oh, ok
sorry :P
 (augsav forgot about B3ta, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 14:50, Reply)
This is a normal post there's no such thing as an anti-war film...

(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:23, Reply)
This is a normal post war has never been so much fun

(I helped save b3ta! h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:34, Reply)
This is a link post Thinking of buying a car? Looking for something cheap, yet sporty?
Look no further...eBay has a gem for you. Two days left, under £500. Absolute bargain! And no...the top half of the car isn't submerged in a large glass of water like what I thought. It really does have a sleek, low roof for increased aerodynamic performance! Don't let this one get away guys...


 (I helped save b3ta! guffguff fuckes your gradeds balls!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:37, Reply)
This is a normal post
I particularly like that two types of wheels for when you encounter two types of road surface when driving.
 (I helped save b3ta! redazril I LIKE DRUGS!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:39, Reply)
This is a normal post It's the Batmobile!

(I helped save b3ta! - D - SharkTrousers, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:41, Reply)
This is a normal post No log-book,tax,MOT and he's moving 300 miles away.......
MMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.............
 (Spin Its a thing., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:45, Reply)
This is a normal post Gert lush.

(pissflaps. FSPW, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:45, Reply)
This is a normal post Brilliant
"I can't take it with me because I'm moving 300 miles" - Its a car, they're meant to be able to drive 300 miles with ease.
 (I helped save b3ta! DinivanX Has stinging piss after drinking Pact Coffee, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:45, Reply)
This is a normal post not when you have to drive 300 miles looking through a mail slot.

(augsav forgot about B3ta, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:12, Reply)
This is a normal post "too much hassel to take it with me"
Can you have too much hoff?
 (I helped save b3ta! Draconacticus Reject shampoo. Demand real poo!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:58, Reply)
This is a normal post A thing of beauty is a joy forever
This, on the other hand, isn't.
 (I helped save b3ta! Brandy_Bumwinkle, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 14:16, Reply)
This is a normal post Good luck
getting an MOT if the seat belt mounting points have moved. Although a full harness might do the job.
 (I helped save b3ta! TheSundaeLunch I'm a fucking shrub, alright?, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 14:24, Reply)
This is a normal post He really is a shit.

(pissflaps. FSPW, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 14:31, Reply)
This is a normal post

(I helped save b3ta! SpookySpoon www.vivino.com/users/hig.func, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:43, Reply)
This is a normal post Is Ronald Mcdonald taking the piss?

(I helped save b3ta! skeltonator Needs some new daps., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:17, Reply)
This is a link post Man talking to Turkeys
I've been laughing at this for over an hour now.

Simple things please simple minds etc...

edit: My good friend @fufkin discovered this video, it only had around 40 views when I first saw it.
(I helped save b3ta! - D - SharkTrousers, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:03, Reply)
This is a normal post haha
that guy crying laughing
 (I helped save b3ta! --- ---, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:05, Reply)
This is a normal post Yeah, he's a star.

(I helped save b3ta! - D - SharkTrousers, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:09, Reply)
This is a normal post
Truly magnificent. Mind you, as far as political rallies go, it's small scale, but the crowd are on his side.

edit: open multiple windows and start them a second or two apart for something wonderful.
 (I helped save b3ta! Kung_Fu_Russ ran out of amusing signatures on, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:13, Reply)
This is a normal post Ahahah! It's a beautiful symphony.

(I helped save b3ta! - D - SharkTrousers, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:17, Reply)
This is a normal post It never ends well...

(I helped save b3ta! Jabberwoc misses D.R. and Quinch, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:13, Reply)
This is a normal post congratulations
that man wins the internet
 (injektilo smoking the weed that killed elvis, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:13, Reply)
This is a normal post Fabulous!
:-D
 (pissflaps. FSPW, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:17, Reply)
This is a normal post You spelt fake wrong

(I helped save b3ta! redazril I LIKE DRUGS!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:31, Reply)
This is a normal post Thats really 'talking turkey'.


I'll get me coat.........
 (Spin Its a thing., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:18, Reply)
This is a normal post I very nearly put that as the subject line.

(I helped save b3ta! - D - SharkTrousers, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:19, Reply)
This is a normal post
Heh, the turkey whisperer.
 (loci, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:31, Reply)
This is a normal post More like a Turkey Gobbler.

(Spin Its a thing., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:46, Reply)
This is a normal post Amazing!
I literally cried with laughter. It's nice to be one of the first 2,000 to see the next big viral video.
 (I helped save b3ta! The Awful Puppy Bakery is still bored, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:38, Reply)
This is a normal post Upon translating that page from Arabic to English, the title is now
Important lanes Bashar al-Assad's speech at the funeral of Asif Shawkat
 (I helped save b3ta! redazril I LIKE DRUGS!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 14:00, Reply)
This is a normal post It's like turkey canned laughter

(I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 14:20, Reply)
This is a normal post hahaha
this is perfect- for it's simplicity, if nothing else
 (augsav forgot about B3ta, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 14:57, Reply)
This is a normal post Yeah he's laughing...
meanwhile the turkeys have decided to pursue the final solution
 (Ol' Ginger Bastard a role model for the children, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:14, Reply)
This is a normal post bwahahaha

(I helped save b3ta! h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:31, Reply)
This is a normal post This reminds me of the house of commons.

(I helped save b3ta! skeltonator Needs some new daps., Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:58, Reply)
This is a normal post hahaha...
...bwahahahaaha
 (MrKane 01234567890123456789012345678901234567890123456789, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 18:01, Reply)
This is a normal post Can't... Breathe
Thats magnificent
 (I helped save b3ta! simbosan is too tired, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 18:10, Reply)
This is a normal post Amazing!

(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 23:28, Reply)
This is a normal post Turkey Capital of the World...
...was for decades Rockingham County in Virginia. Millions of these creatures. And yes, they are definitely holler-backs. Something to do with a brain the size of a flea, unlike their incredibly intelligent wild cousins. These guys need to be brought in from the rain because they will stare up, tiny brain stuck trying to process the falling sky, until they drown. Still, quite friendly. And delicious.
 (Mrs.Fonebone, Sat 4 Aug 2012, 1:11, Reply)
This is a normal post Looks and sounds like a Mitt Romney rally...

(I helped save b3ta! HairyTwatter certified eel and sodium salesman, Sun 5 Aug 2012, 21:56, Reply)
This is a normal post Hullo

(TIVO PUKE, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 12:53, Reply)
This is a normal post ZOINKS!!

(pissflaps. FSPW, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 12:55, Reply)
This is a normal post I get that reaction more times than you would think.
Fancy a bout of wiff-waff?
I see you have some paddles there.
 (TIVO PUKE, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 12:58, Reply)
This is a normal post Well, if the PM's job is to deflect attention from what is really going on, Boris would probably do a good job.

(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 12:57, Reply)
This is a normal post How has he done a bad job as mayor?
Don't live in london anymore but getting a public transport bike scheme working sounds impressive.
 (I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:01, Reply)
This is a normal post ^this
I live here still and he's been a shit-ton better than Ken was.
 (I helped save b3ta! evil_andy Stick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:05, Reply)
This is a normal post he's very good at taking credit
for other people's successful plans

Boris Bikes
Boris Airport
Getting rid of Bendy Buses

etc.
 (Mildred is a slimy, double-crossing, no-good swindler, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:07, Reply)
This is a normal post Why do bendy buses get so much hatred?

(pissflaps. FSPW, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:11, Reply)
This is a normal post another
fine question... used to love the seventyfree.
 (hotpiss is very much liking your popping musics, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:13, Reply)
This is a normal post they were well dangerous & uneconomic
drivers couldnt see if people were stuck in the rear doors

cyclists got hit by them all the time

people could jump on without paying fares

they cost much more than double deckers to insure
 (Mildred is a slimy, double-crossing, no-good swindler, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:16, Reply)
This is a normal post The drivers kept parking them across junctions, crossings
everywhere really.
 (I helped save b3ta! evil_andy Stick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:18, Reply)
This is a normal post According to the wiki page they made up 5% of the bus fleet but were involved in 20% of bus fatalities.
They were also rather flammable.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ajGZv6KBixo
 (I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:19, Reply)
This is a normal post I didn't know any of this, I thought it was just baseless hysteria whipped up by the Daily Mail and chums.
In Berlin there are loads of bendy buses and it all just seems to work.
 (pissflaps. FSPW, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:27, Reply)
This is a normal post I've been to Berlin, lovely city
but you can't help but notice that the roads are comparatively wide and not very congested. Start threading enormous buses through Central London and see how different it gets.
 (I helped save b3ta! evil_andy Stick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:33, Reply)
This is a normal post that may also have someting to do with the fact that
in berlin you can:

legally cycle on the pavements (in most areas)

no one gets pissy if you don't wear a helmet

you only get fined for cycling crimes if you cause an accident

most flats and apartments have cycle parking

you can your bike on most public transport (incl. underground)

motorists are given cycle specific training as part of licencing

it's piss easy to hire a bike

and yes the roads are really wide.

oh, and HITLER.
 (hotpiss is very much liking your popping musics, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:39, Reply)
This is a normal post If the Luftwaffe had done as efficient job as us with carpet bombing London would have a better transport system
But no, we're stuck with a road system built for horse and carts.
 (I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:40, Reply)
This is a normal post it's funny
cos it's true.
 (hotpiss is very much liking your popping musics, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:42, Reply)
This is a normal post And an underground system built for tiny fucking victorians

(I helped save b3ta! Extinct Jesus Dossier "...I think it counteracts Hitler's magic...", Tue 31 Jul 2012, 14:09, Reply)
This is a normal post Potentially dangerous for cyclists
(The turning circle is rather different.)

You'd probably list this in the "pro"s columns, eh? ;-)
 (MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:17, Reply)
This is a normal post not really
what's really dangerous for cyclists is boris johnsons pro-motorist stance and his reluctance to lean on tfl to do anything about many of londons deathly junctions and gyratory systems. but... but... HIS HAIR!
 (hotpiss is very much liking your popping musics, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:20, Reply)
This is a normal post I've seen his pro motorist stance
It was across the frame of that bike he rides to work
 (I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:22, Reply)
This is a normal post the bike
he seems to whip out of nowhere everywhere a camera is on?

cyclelondoncity.blogspot.co.uk/2012/04/why-did-boris-johnson-define-cyclists.html

^ there's more. loads in fact. don't want to clog up the board.
 (hotpiss is very much liking your popping musics, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:26, Reply)
This is a normal post They also take up more road space per passenger than a double decker, which is not great in a highly congested city

(I helped save b3ta! Draconacticus Reject shampoo. Demand real poo!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:21, Reply)
This is a normal post Yes, the roads in London aren't really very good for such a big place.

(pissflaps. FSPW, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:29, Reply)
This is a normal post That's because there's a conspiracy
to slow all traffic down by using traffic lights every fucking ten yards so they can justify congestion charging to line their pockets with more tax from the working man.

/tinfoilhattery
 (I helped save b3ta! Draconacticus Reject shampoo. Demand real poo!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:54, Reply)
This is a normal post you mean
the underused, elitist rip-off that was actually ken livingstone's idea? 'Boris bikes' clearly has more of a ring with the mouth-breathing, easily impressed electorate that 'Kencycles'.
 (hotpiss is very much liking your popping musics, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:06, Reply)
This is a normal post I started using the bikes regularly a few weeks back
and now feel like an idiot for not getting a key sooner

they're absolutely brilliant.
 (Mildred is a slimy, double-crossing, no-good swindler, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:09, Reply)
This is a normal post glad to hear it
i live in south london and the nearest docking bays go no further than vauxhall station. which is about as useful as a cock flavoured lolipop. have you considered getting your own bike? serious question.
 (hotpiss is very much liking your popping musics, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:12, Reply)
This is a normal post i have my own bike
but hardly ever use it - having to lock it up, getting drunk, one-way journeys etc. makes it a pain in the arse for city living.

I live in East London, so the bike stands are everwhere.
 (Mildred is a slimy, double-crossing, no-good swindler, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:14, Reply)
This is a normal post hmmm I smell a hipster...
come on, out with it, your bike at home is a fixie, isn't it? ISN'T IT?
 (Ol' Ginger Bastard a role model for the children, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:22, Reply)
This is a normal post Same here
A complete revelation, and its cheaper than a gym membership
 (skintagain, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 14:03, Reply)
This is a normal post I've seen loads of them being used.
If I worked and lived in central London i'ld be right on it.

Ken had the idea, Boris made them work.
I remember in cambridge when they tried that.
All of them nicked within a week.

But maybe i'm just another one of those mouth breathing sheep eh?
 (I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:13, Reply)
This is a normal post lets go with that then.

(hotpiss is very much liking your popping musics, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:22, Reply)
This is a normal post Oooh! You never did call me a mouth breathing sheep did you?
And here's you not knowing one thing about me, my politics, what I keep in my basement. Anything.
 (I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:24, Reply)
This is a normal post Shocking isn't he!

(pissflaps. FSPW, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:28, Reply)
This is a normal post i am appalled
...Tunbridge Wells.
 (hotpiss is very much liking your popping musics, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:33, Reply)
This is a normal post I can confirm that Amadeus is (at the very least) a "mouth breathing sheep".
He's also a massive ginger WANKER.
 (I helped save b3ta! Tab Hunter Make this useless process end and so, begin again, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 14:53, Reply)
This is a normal post Good afternoon to you too Tabby.

(I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:08, Reply)
This is a normal post You're missing a comma between "too" & "Tabby", Gingernuts.

(I helped save b3ta! Tab Hunter Make this useless process end and so, begin again, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:15, Reply)
This is a normal post I never said he'd done a bad job as mayor
I don't live in London and try to stay away from the place, so I know nothing about his mayorship. Just saying from his TV appearances, he seems like a bit of a loveable buffoon, so he's a good person to pretend to put in charge.
 (MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:06, Reply)
This is a normal post that's how many london voters see him too
and it's quite a studied persona that neatly sidesteps any closer scrutiny as he hides behind a veneer of victorian affability. he remains at heart a swingeing old school tory of dubious character who is more concerned with furthering his own ends and those of the tory party than those of london's citizens.
 (hotpiss is very much liking your popping musics, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:17, Reply)
This is a normal post I'd still rather have him in charge
than that sniveling cockweasle Ken.
 (I helped save b3ta! pixel_fucker is going to need a bigger brush, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:45, Reply)
This is a normal post Jim Davidson
came across as a lovable buffoon on Big Break.
 (I helped save b3ta! monkeon schmonkeon, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:38, Reply)
This is a normal post Really? Even as a kid I thought he was a racist cunt. Him and that one who did the "Confessions of a" soft porn films.
Oh by the way I STILL can't edit my subject lines on /links.


 (I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:44, Reply)
This is a normal post You called?

(pissflaps. FSPW, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:47, Reply)
This is a normal post Can I have access to the blackmail picture stash you have of Rob?
I need mod powers too so I can change subject lines.
 (I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:53, Reply)
This is a normal post Really? We all can.
Mod hates you.
 (MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:52, Reply)
This is a normal post Aye, but like Boris
he generally saved his most bigoted material for when he was off-camera.
 (I helped save b3ta! monkeon schmonkeon, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 14:05, Reply)
This is a normal post Haha
Yes, true, true.

My points were really more about power not being vested in the person who appears to be in charge, so a loveable buffoon / attention seeking cock / slappable etonian is your best bet to distract from their lack of power.
 (MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:49, Reply)
This is a normal post 2% voted "Theresa May"
now I'm not usually a fascist kind of person, but those 2% surely should not be allowed to breed...?
 (Mildred is a slimy, double-crossing, no-good swindler, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:05, Reply)
This is a normal post Mr Flaps sir, might I congratulate you on another successfully troll thread.
I hope I've been helpful pouring a bit of petrol on it :)
 (I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:28, Reply)
This is a normal post Not trolling at all, especially not with the BBC link down there, but it pisses me off that know-nothing-numpties who have probably
never been out of the UK spout forth shit about something they have absolutely no knowledge of, but this is the internet I suppose. Phew, that's better!

Nice petrol chucking BTW.
 (pissflaps. FSPW, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:52, Reply)
This is a normal post Nah I didn't mean the islamic one I meant this one and one from a few days back.
They don't call me Mr Molotov just because I lead a Finnish anti-soviet resistance movement back in 1939
 (I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:59, Reply)
This is a normal post "about as likely as being reincarnated as an olive"
according to the man himself during his interview on Letterman.
 (I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:09, Reply)
This is a normal post said while introducing himself to the American public...

(Ol' Ginger Bastard a role model for the children, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 15:26, Reply)
This is a normal post Not a surprise really.
He's one of the most popular politicos recently. Not sure Red Ken ever made the Late Show: www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Av0-HGN0js
 (PhosphorBurnedEyes Swastika Shop opening here soon, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 17:02, Reply)
This is a link post Bagleys to hold 352 day long rave
featuring Kenny Ken b2b set with Kenny Ken
(Mildred is a slimy, double-crossing, no-good swindler, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 12:45, Reply)
This is a normal post Bagley's will always be The Church to me. Great memories (and mammaries)

(I helped save b3ta! Fray Brentos *mega-belms*, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 12:54, Reply)
This is a normal post I've had her.
She was crap.

Also - two week long jungle set, get innn!
 (MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:01, Reply)
This is a normal post I posted this on FB
and the first reply was some random, claiming similar to you

"I shagged her at Czechtek 2004"
 (Mildred is a slimy, double-crossing, no-good swindler, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:03, Reply)
This is a normal post She said I was the only one ever!
The filthy cow.

*goes to buy bleach and a nailbrush*
 (MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 13:09, Reply)
This is a normal post Bagleys!!!!
www.flickr.com/photos/doilum/4579729858/

I used to spend every Friday there in the late 90's, I would say good memories but it's all a bit of a blur!

*Edit* I just listened to all of that - office lols. Face painting with Dillinjer & Lemon D!!! hahaha
 (I helped save b3ta! SpookySpoon www.vivino.com/users/hig.func, Tue 31 Jul 2012, 16:47, Reply)

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