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I knew it!
news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/4641567.stm
(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:56, archived)
TJ: If the Mr Food woman is still here
You can listen to the song here, but it won't work for me for some reason.

www.sidthemanager.co.uk/factoid.htm
(I helped save b3ta! Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:58, archived)
This may be the strangest reply ive yet to see

(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 9:01, archived)
A suffusion of yellow

(I helped save b3ta! Geordie Al, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 9:08, archived)
I like the fact that there is a whole paragraph headed "Hormones"
Just about sums it up really.
(I helped save b3ta! Nimble Colin camera-wrangling, globe-trotting whisky enthusiast, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 9:01, archived)
Only women bleed!

(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 9:02, archived)
But we can do it for five days and not die.

(I helped save b3ta! Bob Todd whee, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 9:08, archived)

img129.exs.cx/img129/3918/harshbutunfair21aj.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 9:14, archived)
different maybe,
that website is www.namemytune.com

dont know how good it is but might be worth a go. It might be American, and your tune might be a bit obscure. God I'm rambling on today.

Carry on.
(I helped save b3ta! Jobe, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:41, archived)
Smoke cigarettes - live longer. Here is the proof.

The longest any person is known to have lived is 122 years. That was Jeanne Calment, a Frenchwoman who died in 1997. No one knows why she lived that long (she smoked cigarettes until she was 97, when she quit for her health).*

*it obviously worked as she lived another 25 years. Asked on her 100th birthday what kind of future she anticipated, she responded: "A very short one."
(I helped save b3ta! Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:01, archived)
How did you
find that song? Any luck finding out anything at all about the Mr Food?
(I helped save b3ta! diffy maybs, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:08, archived)
Thats it, we're having you induced

(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:09, archived)
Hahaha

(I helped save b3ta! Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:10, archived)
Why

???

I do really just want to have it now though...oh I know this is prolly old news but ive always meant to say well done on your weight loss, i lost 5 stone last year (i think most of it has found me again, dont know not weighed) and i know how dedicated you have to be to get that far, well done

*offers apple as reward*
(I helped save b3ta! diffy maybs, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:13, archived)
Why thank you:)
55lbs it was
(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:15, archived)
Thats a bloody big baby.

(I helped save b3ta! The Teviot Moose major 5th., Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:16, archived)
Excuse me a second im just going to take a dump
And i will be thinking of you as i birth the mewling brown baby
(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:17, archived)
55lbs of brown-baby?
impressive.
(I helped save b3ta! The Teviot Moose major 5th., Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:19, archived)
I just googled

55 brown-baby
(I helped save b3ta! diffy maybs, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:21, archived)
Wonders if that will guarantee getting fired?

(I helped save b3ta! The Teviot Moose major 5th., Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:23, archived)

freepages.genealogy.rootsweb.com/~t42cemeteries/Texas/Tarrant/Bedford/BROWN_baby_1902.JPG

edit:and for some reason, this: www.jud10.org/CountyCourt/CountyJudges/coon.htm
(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:23, archived)
Pfft.
Are there similar entries for Yellow, Black and Honky?
(I helped save b3ta! The Teviot Moose major 5th., Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:26, archived)
It's not the 55lbs that worries me
It's the mewling! What the hell did Mykey eat last night?!?
(I helped save b3ta! Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:25, archived)
BABY!
Anyway im orf to the orifice for a bit...think i might take the afternoon off....and maybe tomorow...

*ponders*
(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:27, archived)



*renders*
(I helped save b3ta! Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:30, archived)
and how about a courtesy flush for the benefit of others.

(I helped save b3ta! Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:27, archived)
Well done

I have managed to convince myself that the second I have this baby I will shed about 4 stone instantly.

I am gonna be so dissapointed.
(I helped save b3ta! diffy maybs, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:17, archived)
I have not found Mr Food
give me a clue, where did you hear it and when?
It may have been on a TV program rather than a single.
(I helped save b3ta! Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:23, archived)
Someone has suggested
it was a radio jingle, but I'm sure I remember a video to it as well, a real fat bloke in a skanky brown armchair, he had an accent, kinda northern I think. I am so sure it was a proper song, but of course I am me.

That doesn't actually help at all does it?
(I helped save b3ta! diffy maybs, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:26, archived)
I read about a website
the other day where you can record yourself humming a tune and people will tell you what it is. Dont know what it was though. And I dont know if this is even very helpful because I have not been paying attention to anything that has been said.

Carry on.

Oh, and Ning everyone.
(I helped save b3ta! Jobe, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:29, archived)
Oh try to remember

I remember the tune and everything it went like this

*hums*
(I helped save b3ta! diffy maybs, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:33, archived)
Ham and Spam and lamb and jam
and chicken biriani? Not that one?

Edit: www.flowerbedmusic.com/biography.htm - got to number 62 in the UK Hit Parade
(I helped save b3ta! Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:30, archived)
yes that's the lyrics she gave me
(or at least they are similar)
(I helped save b3ta! Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:34, archived)
No not Ham and Spam and lamb and jam
, chicken birini yes, peanut butter

Ham and Spam and lamb and jam could have been mentioned...in the bits Ive forgotten...what song is it???????
(I helped save b3ta! diffy maybs, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:36, archived)
It was a spin-off
from Steve Wright in the Afternoon
www.scbd.connectfree.co.uk/flops/before-me-tea.html
(I helped save b3ta! Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:37, archived)
Oh it might be.....
it looks as though it is doesnt it....where can i listen to it?
(I helped save b3ta! diffy maybs, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:37, archived)
ok I have found the catalog entry
Tangible records, 1990. "And That's Before Me Tea!'

As it only got to 62 it may take some finding.
(I helped save b3ta! Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:39, archived)
really got to work now
but www.b3ta.com/talk/617886
(I helped save b3ta! just mike, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:39, archived)
Ok
I will not look for it if she takes up your offer
(I helped save b3ta! Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:41, archived)
This man (or woman) is lovely
wow!

I didnt make it up!

Wow!
(I helped save b3ta! diffy maybs, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:42, archived)
Why?
In the name of all that is holy, why?

I don't have any experience with mp3s, but seeing as I can find about three pages about it, I don't fancy your chances.

Good news! You can buy the CD:
www.recordstores.com/cds/mr-food.html
(I helped save b3ta! Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:40, archived)
I just remember it

at the time everyone was singing it, a few years after it went out, when ever I mentioned it no one knew what I was on about, it's nice to know I'm not going raving mad.

On a completly different note I get to pick up my crutches from physio today, so i can get people to hold my crutch!
(I helped save b3ta! diffy maybs, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:45, archived)
Crutches?
What have you done?
(I helped save b3ta! Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:50, archived)
It's not
this chap is it?

Could have been a spin-off single from the show.


/two penn'orth
(I helped save b3ta! Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:28, archived)
no

dont think so...
(I helped save b3ta! diffy maybs, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:34, archived)
Very brief 'ning to you all
I have Mr Food* on vinyl in the house.
Unfortunately I have no means of playing it, or transferring into mp3.
If you want it, email me (in profile) and I shall post it to you.
Got to do work now, so email me. ttfn.

*spin off from Steve Wright in the afternoon on Radio 1 c. 1986, very funny
(I helped save b3ta! just mike, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:36, archived)
*starts running battle with the capitalist pigs*

(I helped save b3ta! The Teviot Moose major 5th., Tue 5 Jul 2005, 7:56, archived)
*oppresses*
Ning!
(I helped save b3ta! Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:01, archived)
*chucks bottle of piss*

(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:06, archived)
*looks like a pansy on BBC news*
*gets head stoved in by the filth*

*calls Daddy to have him bail me out*


Watching it on the news last night there seemed to be three factions of protestors - The Tristans, The Anarchists and The Begbies.
(I helped save b3ta! Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 8:33, archived)
Over 2 hours

since the last post...

I can't let it get to 2 and a half, I just can't

'Insert interesting comment here'
(I helped save b3ta! diffy maybs, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 6:22, archived)
*spang*

(I helped save b3ta! cuntmuffin, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 6:31, archived)
have you
been here all night?
(I helped save b3ta! robh, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 6:38, archived)
No

Whatever made you say that???

I actually slept last night!!!
(I helped save b3ta! diffy maybs, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 7:16, archived)
*insert something interesting here*

(I helped save b3ta! Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 7:05, archived)
*makes immature 'insert' joke*

(s0WmVHAwZgpG, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 7:07, archived)
*slaps*

(P-nut Obsessive Compulsive Green Day Disorder..., Tue 5 Jul 2005, 7:11, archived)
*bums*

(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 7:13, archived)
*goes to work*


Oh
(I helped save b3ta! Hankster, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 7:14, archived)
You just dont know how to give a good bumming anymore:(

(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 7:19, archived)
I challenge you

to say a whole sentence without using the words bum, bumming or any other variation of it...
(I helped save b3ta! diffy maybs, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 7:21, archived)
Ok i will

(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 7:22, archived)
Hmmmm

you said will. which is a bit like willy, which is a rudey bit like a bum, therefore you failed

a ha
(I helped save b3ta! diffy maybs, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 7:34, archived)
Bumble




Damn!
(I helped save b3ta! Hankster, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 7:23, archived)
*gives as good as she takes*

(P-nut Obsessive Compulsive Green Day Disorder..., Tue 5 Jul 2005, 7:22, archived)
*puts on greenday*
*continues bumming*
(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 7:28, archived)
YAY!
*enjoys even more*
(P-nut Obsessive Compulsive Green Day Disorder..., Tue 5 Jul 2005, 7:33, archived)
Laughs

at use of word 'immature' on b3ta talk
(I helped save b3ta! diffy maybs, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 7:18, archived)
Great curries?

(I helped save b3ta! cheesebread at the third stroke, hammertime will be, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 3:39, archived)
Greek hurries?

(JPaddy, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 3:39, archived)
Greek furries?

(s0WmVHAwZgpG, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 4:00, archived)
greek worries!
/ed: sleepytime - night all :)
(I helped save b3ta! cheesebread at the third stroke, hammertime will be, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 4:17, archived)
I've just had a wank
now i'm listening to Kraftwerk..what a night
(smoglane!, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 1:32, archived)
hahahah
ace.
(I helped save b3ta! MrA, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 1:50, archived)
That's like my night last night
Only without the kraftwerk

Edit: And with that I'm switching off and snuggling up. Possibly for more of the same. 'night
(I helped save b3ta! useful_idiot, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 1:51, archived)
New post time!
this is really a note for me for the morning.

Parrott. Dont forget to ring John and post that CD.

All the best, your past self in bed.

xxxxx
(Quatermass and teh Shit, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 1:17, archived)
P.S.
Have the sexytimes with Comma.
(I helped save b3ta! Comma, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 1:21, archived)
John peel?
Its a bit late...
(I helped save b3ta! Dobsky, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 1:21, archived)
john paull II
he's alright, right?
(Quatermass and teh Shit, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 1:22, archived)
John Parrott Shirley?

(JPaddy, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 3:41, archived)
Oh dear god
the bizarre acid trip that is the boobahs have a flash game

www.boohbah.com/zone.html

Edit: the abundance of monkey themed front page posts has generated lots of monkey related google text ads, hehehhehe
(Naughty Tortoise, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:26, archived)
Boohbah gives me the fear,
what the fuck do they do?
(I helped save b3ta! Malchick, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:33, archived)
Beats me

(Naughty Tortoise, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:35, archived)
Can I beat you?
please?
(I helped save b3ta! Zuowan, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:44, archived)
Only gently

(Naughty Tortoise, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:47, archived)
Shut it bitch
I'll beat you the way I like.
(I helped save b3ta! Zuowan, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:49, archived)
*retracts into shell*
Foiled!
(Naughty Tortoise, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:51, archived)
I'm going to go to bed now...

(I helped save b3ta! Shoosh up your lips Not state-funded, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:45, archived)
I am in bed!
Oh dear. I really need a life.
(I helped save b3ta! useful_idiot, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:49, archived)
I could be in bed.
However that would mean using the laptop, which is A: A PC, B: Running Windows ME, and C: Crap.
(I helped save b3ta! so long and thanks for all the fish, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:50, archived)
None of these are stopping me
This proves just how sad I am.
(I helped save b3ta! useful_idiot, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:54, archived)
I don't think you understand
quite how crap my laptop is. 350MHz Pentium II, 160MB RAM, 10GB hard drive, no 3D to speak of, and the only built-in networking is a 56k modem. Luckily I have a wifi card for it. Oh, and only one USB port, too.
(I helped save b3ta! so long and thanks for all the fish, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:57, archived)
Mine is worse
I can't remember how much worse, but it is. But then it is a hand-me-down from my uncle, who 'liberated' it from a previous job, so what do you expect.
(I helped save b3ta! useful_idiot, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 1:04, archived)
I'm no just the only one, then

(Quatermass and teh Shit, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:55, archived)
Hoorah
Although I originally booted the thing up with the intention of working on my "novel", but got distracted. No wonder I've been writing the damn thing for about 3 years.
(I helped save b3ta! useful_idiot, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:57, archived)
I was just doing it for the novelty
and ended up getting the fear with Half Life 2
(Quatermass and teh Shit, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 1:01, archived)
How is
this NSFW 'porn' a turn on?
(I helped save b3ta! cheesebread at the third stroke, hammertime will be, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:23, archived)
What the fuck
is going on there?
(I helped save b3ta! Zuowan, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:25, archived)
The bummings?

(Naughty Tortoise, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:31, archived)
also on the hun:
"Pregant lesbian action in this movie from Bibi"

now, I see two things wrong with that one...
(I helped save b3ta! cheesebread at the third stroke, hammertime will be, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:32, archived)
Not sure I understand the whole
"perspective" thing there...
(I helped save b3ta! Shoosh up your lips Not state-funded, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:46, archived)
she
has one bad bee sting.
(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 1:20, archived)
CROSS POSTING WHORE ALERT!
www.b3ta.com/board/4845211
(I helped save b3ta! Malchick, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:22, archived)
Ooh you
cross posting whore, you.
(I helped save b3ta! NobbyNobody 21 years a b3tan, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:30, archived)
I
don't get it.
(I helped save b3ta! so long and thanks for all the fish, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:33, archived)
Whiteley died of pneumonia...
well, indirectly, but "complications during surgery" takes up more than 9 letters.
(I helped save b3ta! Malchick, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:34, archived)
Ah.
I get it now.

Thanks.
(I helped save b3ta! so long and thanks for all the fish, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:35, archived)
Story
One fucking day you were thinking about peas, corn and stuff when suddenly you saw a toilet seat in bed with pickles - a lot of pickles. Then what could be clearer than milk? Take a mirror inside... what? Uh? What? Pip you! Cunting... Crows. But then an alien had a poo very badly on your skin! What are you doing you bad fucking alien, huh?! I hate you and all and I've just tried to borrow your skin (with poo!) Then I woke up and I've had peas and mash for breakfast and some vomit I found on a toilet seat. Yum yum, little bit sour but still alright. Tastes like chicken, no? Tastes like vomit. Well duh. What? Quim. How many cows can you eat at once? Three, thinks I. My breakfast continues in quite a good mood but then the world ends (again) due to an accounting error, but I hate these things.
So I went back to sleep and had a dream about my castle on the island where I was fighting with my sense of humour against Jeremy Beadle who was a fucking cunt when I was 10 years old and had no pen.
Suddenly Chaka Khan came to me and sucked my big fat cock (which I'd transplanted successfully) until I started to feel that everything was pointless except the existence of vomit.
The end.
(I helped save b3ta! Zuowan, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:50, archived)
Ha! You're so random!
...

*commits spangy-kiri*
(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:53, archived)
*blubs*
but I wanted a bedtime story with princesses and princes and a big castle and a big pink fairy and a happyeverafter ending
*cries*
(Mehitabel_Itrang, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:53, archived)
w0u7d u l3ik v14rg4
is all I ever get
(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:59, archived)
care to buy a genyuin rollax?

(Mehitabel_Itrang, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:01, archived)
wholemeal or granary?

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:02, archived)
I can give you a great new mortgage deal on your granary
would you like to be well endowed?
(Mehitabel_Itrang, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:05, archived)
duz yaw cum
just dribble?
impr)ve yaw cumsh0ts
(I helped save b3ta! NobbyNobody 21 years a b3tan, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:10, archived)
Poke a penguin
www2.gamesville.lycos.com/html_poke/poke_penguin.htm
(Naughty Tortoise, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:48, archived)
hehehehe

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:50, archived)
Loved this!
Especially after you get hammered and keep trying to poke.

And with this penguin pokery, I'm off to bed
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:55, archived)
heh
reminds me of "poke the bunny" used to play it off www.fetchfido.com
(I helped save b3ta! sudo is bored, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:07, archived)
I just remembered part of last night.
Me and my mate Paddy, pissed as fook, running around in a corn field pretending we were in Vietnam. No wonder my knees kill.
(I helped save b3ta! grindforcolumbine Terrorism is bloody rude., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:35, archived)
Nekkid?

(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:37, archived)
Maybe.
I only remembered because I found corn in my shoes. We may have been only wearing shoes.
(I helped save b3ta! grindforcolumbine Terrorism is bloody rude., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:38, archived)
Running naked round a field is something everyone should do
before they get old enough to be properly arrested and called a paedophile.

*yawns*

random songs 'I'm Only Sleeping' by the Beatles, followed by 'Can't Lose You' by Type-o.. Must be time for bed
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:51, archived)
Does anyone have anything they don't like eating for no logical reason?
Just thinking I know people who won't eat:

Chips that are from the outer bit of the potato, ie not straight.

The bit of boiled egg in the lid you cut off with a knife (Made her feel sick)

The yoghurt on the underside of the lid.
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:03, archived)
bacon whose rind still has hair attached
without hair is just dandy
(Mehitabel_Itrang, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:05, archived)
That reminds me,
I once had a pork scratching which had the pig's brand on it. It was strange.
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:09, archived)
Mushrooms
but there is a logical reason.

The devil scrapes them from his evil fetid arsehole.
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword now that's fresh, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:05, archived)
this
my main defense for not eating them (other than the fact that they are thoroughly disgusting) is that even our dog (who will eat almost anything) won't touch them.
even if they are chopped up small in leftovers, he'll leave them behind.

they aren't supposed to be eaten.
(I helped save b3ta! sex and dougs and rock n roll, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:09, archived)
They are lovely in soup or a sauce.

(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:15, archived)
Agreed.
There is something inherently wrong about teh mushrooms.
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword now that's fresh, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:15, archived)
mushrooms
are quite lovely and the right kind are quite spacey
(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:26, archived)
They
grow out of dead stuff. It is all of the wrongness.
(I helped save b3ta! so long and thanks for all the fish, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:34, archived)
Maggots also grow on dead things
and you love to eat them don't you?
don't you?
blowfly maggots plucked from the festering eyesockets of a month-dead Tokyo whore. Yum.
(I helped save b3ta! NobbyNobody 21 years a b3tan, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:52, archived)
You, sir, are twisted.
And unnaturally skilled in the art of biro-fu.
(I helped save b3ta! so long and thanks for all the fish, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:54, archived)
Thankyou
and thankyou
Hwaaaaa!
(I helped save b3ta! NobbyNobody 21 years a b3tan, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:05, archived)
butter
with toast crumbs in
(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:09, archived)
I don't like that, but would eat it
if there were no other butter.

I'm thinking about it, and coming to the conclusion I'll eat pretty much anything. Apart from fennel.
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:17, archived)
Fennel is good for indigestion
but there is nothing viler than fennel and mint tea
(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:22, archived)
what about slurry cappucino?

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:26, archived)
It's a bit...
nutty.
(I helped save b3ta! NobbyNobody 21 years a b3tan, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:06, archived)
Any tea that is not tea
is foul. I call it 'warm Ribena', 'tis not tea at all.

*still needs to go to Chinatown for green tea, 3 weeks on*
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:26, archived)
this ^

(I helped save b3ta! Xkimo was at work on, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:20, archived)
One o fmy friends refuses to eat steak
unless it is literally a case of "Wipe its arse and cut its face off, then put it on my plate", she won't touch it at all if its too cooked...
(P-nut Obsessive Compulsive Green Day Disorder..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:11, archived)
that's just common sense
it's fucking offensive to take a high quality piece of beef and then to cook it to destroy all its lovely flavourness.
(Brad Dice, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:13, archived)
You don't mean literally.
/pedant
(I helped save b3ta! Newington, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:18, archived)
No
I probably don't, but after spending the evening in the rain, being jumped on by twenty 8 year olds and playing parachute games with them, I'm beyond the point of caring....
(P-nut Obsessive Compulsive Green Day Disorder..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:22, archived)
Thank god I'm not the only one who gets annoyed at that.

(I helped save b3ta! Malchick, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:23, archived)
*sigh*
"Wipe its arse and cut its face off, then put it on my plate"

Note the speech marks, and the fact it's referring to a phrase that is a well known description of rare meat. So using 'literally' is for effect, exaggerating the meaning. In the same way people use hyperbole.
Or metaphors for that matter.

But more so, fuck off with your pissy elitism.
Language is not a science, you can bend it to convey meaning as you wish. Poetry, for example.
(Naughty Tortoise, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:13, archived)
something open that I didn't realise was open results in me paranoidly worrying if it's been open before it was bought

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:15, archived)
My ex refused to eat any kind of fish or seafood
because "it came out the sea", which she thought was disgusting.
(I helped save b3ta! Newington, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:16, archived)
there's a lot of poo in the sea
some of it fish poo, some human, then dead bodies and wee, and condoms....

She has a point.
(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:18, archived)
reminds me of w.c.fields line on why he wouldn't drink water
fish fuck in it
(Mehitabel_Itrang, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:20, archived)
There's a lot of nasty stuff in the air as well, though.
I think she just thought the sea was disgusting of itself. She was a bit odd like that.
(I helped save b3ta! Newington, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:20, archived)
My girlfriend calls shrimps
"sea insects". That put me off them for life.
(I helped save b3ta! grindforcolumbine Terrorism is bloody rude., Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:20, archived)
Oh yeah!
An ex loved scampi, but won't even touch prawns. The thought turned her.
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:22, archived)
also an awful lot of poo in mince

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:20, archived)
Someone I knew wouldn't drink any type of milk
apart from the irradiated pasteurised nuked stuff that's like water. The reason (said non-seriously!)

"It's been pissed out of a cow's arse"
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:20, archived)
that's a strange type of milk
they've bin drinkin
(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:21, archived)
Liver, kidneys
and other offal.

Because it is the sludge scraped from the toenails of a diseased Tokyo whore.
(I helped save b3ta! NobbyNobody 21 years a b3tan, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:21, archived)
What about teh lovely haggis?

(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:24, archived)
Maybe even worse.
Because haggis is the sludge scraped from the toenails of a diseased SCOTTISH whore
(I helped save b3ta! NobbyNobody 21 years a b3tan, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:49, archived)
Cucumbers.
All the males in my family have it. They are the only food (so far) that, if presented to me at a friend's house, I wouldn't even eat out of politeness.
(I helped save b3ta! Malchick, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:26, archived)
Bread
No real reason, I just hate the stuff.
(I helped save b3ta! Dobsky, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:26, archived)
I love bread
cheese is wonnerful too
(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:27, archived)
Cheese and onion bread..
mmmm.
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:30, archived)
mmmmm
that does sound quite lovely
(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:35, archived)

roll out bread dough, place alternating lines of fried red onion and brie. roll up and cook in the oven. very nice...
(I helped save b3ta! sudo is bored, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 0:14, archived)
maybe it bit you as a child

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:27, archived)
What type?
bap, bagel, batch, baguette, croissant, crumpet, cob, ciabatta, chapatti..
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:29, archived)
All of them, cant stand anything bread related.
:P
(I helped save b3ta! Dobsky, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:31, archived)
Beer is liquid bread.. Cake is sweet bread..
Join the dark side..
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:33, archived)
No. testicles are sweetbreads.

(I helped save b3ta! NobbyNobody 21 years a b3tan, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:50, archived)
thanks for contributing to my b3taday thread
i've put it somewhere safe.
(Brad Dice, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:02, archived)
Where

what

how

I dont get it

???

erm
(I helped save b3ta! diffy maybs, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:03, archived)
DELETER!
you shall now be hung for your crimes
(I helped save b3ta! sex and dougs and rock n roll, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:06, archived)
only joking
www.b3ta.com/talk/617687
(Brad Dice, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:07, archived)
where's the whole thing?

(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:09, archived)
everyone should be responsible for their own posts
i know where mine are.
(Brad Dice, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:11, archived)
Winamp is a million times better than it was 5 years ago,
and I'm all happy.

I'm also still happy with Firefox, and XP hasn't borked on me yet, unlike 2000pro and '98 did.

Computers are fucking skilliant when they work.
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 22:36, archived)
wait until firefox gets hungry

(I helped save b3ta! Giant bunny jumping out like a large happy tourettes rabbit, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 22:38, archived)
I keep getting nagged to upgrade my winamp,
I happy as it fookin' well is
(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 22:40, archived)
meh
iTunes is much lovelier than winamp (as I remember winamp, anyway: probably better now).

Firefox is all of teh loveliness, though.
(trumpet, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 22:41, archived)
foobar is superior to all other music playing programmes
cos it has an ubercool name
(Brad Dice, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 22:42, archived)
I missed this
and yes it does
(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:13, archived)
backup your firefox bookmarks
i hear it likes to eat them sometimes
(I helped save b3ta! The Incredible... accident free since, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 22:50, archived)
Ooh yes, I've heard that..
*backs up*
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:07, archived)
I like using foobar
it's quite the business

I found winamp liked to fall over for no reason
(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:00, archived)
damn
i missed my b3taday again!
(Brad Dice, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 22:33, archived)
you didn't miss it
it lasts for another 20 hours
(I helped save b3ta! sex and dougs and rock n roll, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 22:34, archived)
wahoooooozle!!!
i couldn't work out how i had missed it. So what should i do to sellybrate?
(Brad Dice, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 22:36, archived)
erm..
shop a kitten?

/obvious and frankly, a bit dull
(I helped save b3ta! sex and dougs and rock n roll, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 22:37, archived)
don't do pictures
cos no-one ever appreciates my subtle sense of humour. maybe someone could do something nice for me with this pic what i like, though:


www2.b3ta.com/spot-the-giference/15.woo
(Brad Dice, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 22:38, archived)

and what am i supposed to open a WOO file with?
(I helped save b3ta! sex and dougs and rock n roll, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 22:39, archived)
hooplashop v4
or you can use yayshop pro, but i find it fiddly.
(Brad Dice, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 22:41, archived)
That made
me giggle...
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword now that's fresh, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:10, archived)
firefox of course

(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 23:19, archived)
My eyes look like that
if I drink spirits
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 22:48, archived)
Never mind.

(I helped save b3ta! Comma, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 22:34, archived)
No you haven't.
You missed your b3taminute, admittedly.
(I helped save b3ta! Malchick, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 22:34, archived)
right
i'm going on air for about an hour or so
www.ftlfm.com | www.ftlfm.com/board | 83.149.101.8:8014/listen.pls
(I helped save b3ta! sex and dougs and rock n roll, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 22:27, archived)
Doing the singings?

(I helped save b3ta! Comma, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 22:29, archived)
nah
not tonight, i need to do some preparation before i do. i'll try to do it within the next week or so.
(I helped save b3ta! sex and dougs and rock n roll, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 22:30, archived)
Hurrah!

(I helped save b3ta! Comma, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 22:31, archived)
what is that god awful noise ?
*turns off*
(I helped save b3ta! connor, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 22:38, archived)
erm...
martin grech?
i admit, it probably doesn't sound to great at 64k, but i enjoyed it
(I helped save b3ta! sex and dougs and rock n roll, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 22:41, archived)

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