Right I'm off peeps

I'm ignoring my hubby at the moment and need to be 'not busy' so he can really see I'm ignoring him, right now he might just think I'm so caught up on here that I haven't thought to talk to him.

Bye freaks
( diffy maybs, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:56, archived)

Why are you ignoring him?

( Comma, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:57, archived)

You know when you women are 'ignoring us'
And you think we must be really worried?

We're not, we're just thinking of replacing you with a model that comes with less hassle and better tits.
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:58, archived)

That was really not a sensible thing to say

( Giant bunny jumping out like a large happy tourettes rabbit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:59, archived)

I'm feverish and hence its excusable

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 19:00, archived)

The hell it is
No one has better tits than me*

*yes it's a big fat lie
( Giant bunny jumping out like a large happy tourettes rabbit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 19:01, archived)

A fair point


*fwaps*
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 19:02, archived)

a newer model
with a bit more go in it.
One that tries that bit harder on a more regular basis.

I believe that one week is disrespectful for any woman to deprive a man and if this period has expired without good excuse (such as childbirth) then the man is fully entitled to shag his mistress.

Keeps my wife on her toes.
( Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 19:00, archived)

what a lovely lady
byeee!
( MCQ Cartoons n' shit: bagowank.com, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:58, archived)

You say that
and yet you call us freaks?
what is wrong with calling him an utter cunt then not explaining it?
then he will know for sure you are
( Giant bunny jumping out like a large happy tourettes rabbit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:58, archived)

I just pretend to be busy
then take wifey by surprise while she is looking for the remote control under the settee where the baby tends to always lose it.
( Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:58, archived)

Surprise bottomsex kind of surprise?

( Comma, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:59, archived)

If she is lucky

yes
( Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 19:01, archived)

I've just had fish and chips
yum
( Hidden Mouse, Sleeping Kitten Gromada? Gromada!, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:40, archived)

Bah

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:41, archived)

That would be
lamb and chips.

I'm about to have chilli.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:54, archived)

I'm having some later on.
So yum in advance.
(MooCow_Byter, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:41, archived)

I've just had
a bowl of cherries and strawberries.
Yummly yum.
( Comma, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:41, archived)

Steak and chips for me

( Giant bunny jumping out like a large happy tourettes rabbit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:42, archived)

*coughs patheticaly*

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:44, archived)

you want a portion?
tough
I ate it all
like the big bloater I am
( Giant bunny jumping out like a large happy tourettes rabbit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:45, archived)

Did you take any photos?

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:46, archived)

FOOD PRON!

( Giant bunny jumping out like a large happy tourettes rabbit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:47, archived)

*vomits*

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:50, archived)

hehehehe
*waves one of the cucumbers from JV's trolley*
( Giant bunny jumping out like a large happy tourettes rabbit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:51, archived)

Gah!
Bleach it!
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:52, archived)

*hands to HMSK*

( Giant bunny jumping out like a large happy tourettes rabbit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:54, archived)

as in
the sexual sense had?
( DrPoppers Touched by his noodly appendage, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:42, archived)

Pffft

( diffy maybs, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:43, archived)

I've just had
pasta with onions, sweetcorn and peppers in red pesto with smoked cheddar
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:42, archived)

oop north they make them by putting them
in hot melted fat. You eat them and die, but by heck they taste better than our namby pamby, fried in nut oil with a hint of smegma from the yoof workers fingers, southern version.
( Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:43, archived)

mine were fried in engine oil
scraped off t'road

an' I were lucky!
( Hidden Mouse, Sleeping Kitten Gromada? Gromada!, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:45, archived)

Did you have to walk

15 miles in the snow, barefoot, to get it?
( diffy maybs, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:47, archived)

nay
30 miles in t'volcanic eruption, buck nekkid bar a 210lb rucksack, wit' five kids clinging on t'back
( Hidden Mouse, Sleeping Kitten Gromada? Gromada!, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:49, archived)

lucky bugger

( diffy maybs, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:51, archived)

I'll have to have what I'm given

hubby gotta cook, I can't stand up

No Mykey, I have not been on the gin.
( diffy maybs, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:46, archived)

I've just bought a telescope
*does the just bought a telescope dance*
( Newington, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:46, archived)

Wants to know

what the 'telescope dance' looks like

a guy at college did 'the boob dance'

that was funny
( diffy maybs, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:48, archived)

not as good as
the "weasel dance" I'll warrant
( Hidden Mouse, Sleeping Kitten Gromada? Gromada!, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:50, archived)

It looks broken,
it seems to be pointing at nextdoors window
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:51, archived)

I had my Friday usual

( djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:49, archived)

which was?

( Hidden Mouse, Sleeping Kitten Gromada? Gromada!, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:50, archived)

fried poo
?
( diffy maybs, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:52, archived)

Kebab :)

( djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:52, archived)

same difference

in some places...
( diffy maybs, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:53, archived)

Not at my local
it's all good
( djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:54, archived)

And full of chilli
did you go for the massive one again?
( Giant bunny jumping out like a large happy tourettes rabbit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:57, archived)

No
just a small doner this week :)
( djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 19:00, archived)

I'm wearing a black suit
and a white dicky bow.

Admire me. ADMIRE ME.
(Quatermass and teh Shit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:37, archived)

*admires*

*wipes nose with back of hand*
( diffy maybs, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:40, archived)

fwarr

( djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:40, archived)

I want photos!

( Comma, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:40, archived)

female nudey ones?

( diffy maybs, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:42, archived)

God yes.

( Comma, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:43, archived)

You can never see enough
nudey (topless will do) female pictures.
Even better if you know the female.
( Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:44, archived)

But not 'even better'

if you know her and she's a dog*

*dog as in ugly munter not as in bitch with 4 legs
( diffy maybs, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:46, archived)

Oh there's a certain "car crash" appeal to dog* pics


*of the human variety
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:50, archived)

*frowns*

( Giant bunny jumping out like a large happy tourettes rabbit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:54, archived)

conceded

( Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:50, archived)

Can I have a look

when your done?
( diffy maybs, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:45, archived)

suit
and a white dicky bow.

Admire me. ADMIRE ME. man
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:40, archived)

Like a glove?

( Randomgazz, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:42, archived)

*widdles in jacket pocket*

( N3d, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:42, archived)

Not many people have understood this compo
and they're just 'shopping what your parents tell you - not what would happen if it were true
( The Coast Of Yemen, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:30, archived)

Isn't he one of the old bastards in last of the summer wine?

( Randomgazz, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:33, archived)

aye
the smelly one with the face like a bag of spanner...


bless his soul. *bows head*
(thisismyclone, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:35, archived)

I guess the fact that he's now dead means
Compo --------» Compost


_*tish-boom*
(thisismyclone, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:37, archived)

Nah,
it's CaroWallis's dog apparently.
( Ptolemy the man with the silent pea, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:35, archived)

I've been trying
and failing (to my own satisfaction at least) to animate a child's head deflating as he picks his brains out through his nose. Not sure if that counts, but I take your point
( Ptolemy the man with the silent pea, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:34, archived)

I've been trying to think of things all day
I try desperately not to tell my kids the kind of freaky stuff my mum told me, like if you swallow apple pips a tree will grow out of your ear. I haven't been able to come up with anything 'shoppable though
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:34, archived)

my mother told me taht if I swallowed raw jelly cubes
(before they have been put in water and set) that they swell up in your tummy and go hard and you die.
She told me this just after I had eaten a cube. The bastard.
I still vividly remember that moment, I cried and cried and it has affected me all my life. I was only 4.
( Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:37, archived)

this is one of the reasons
why I don't want to tell my kids that kind of thing. also because at some point you have to tell them that you've lied to them. it's one thing to have Santa and tooth fairies and things, but horrific things that might happen we didn't like the idea of
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:41, archived)

I got Hanson

songs in my head, I know all the words to their 'Middle of Nowhere' album*, how can I get these tunes outta my head?

*I know I should be ashamed but I feel really quite proud.
( diffy maybs, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:28, archived)

Chop your head off.

( djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:28, archived)

Anyone spinning the decks tonight?
Or playing MP3s down a wire?
( N3d, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:30, archived)

mmmmmmmmmbop
Ba-ba-dooowop
(s0WmVHAwZgpG, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:28, archived)

www.b3ta.com/talk/627128
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:29, archived)

'ning

and how are we today?
( diffy maybs, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:36, archived)

Go out,
and pay a man money to shoot his seed into your ears.
( Randomgazz, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:30, archived)

Eerie fucker

/hides for such a poor pun
( Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:32, archived)

that really was awful
*snigger*
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:36, archived)

I used to fancy the fit girl from Hanson

(thisismyclone, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:31, archived)

she was a he
and you are Michael Jackson AICMFP
( Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:32, archived)

I am not Michael Jackson
for a start, I have much better taste in children. That Gavin Arvizo was a minger.
(thisismyclone, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:36, archived)

Thought I'd share a few tunes before I go out
for half hour or so

shoutcast3.plexus-internet.com:8000/listen.pls
( Hankster, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:24, archived)

Linkeh no workeh

( djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:26, archived)

try now

( Hankster, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:29, archived)

all i can hear is you typing
and whispering to yourself

(I think you have ballsed this up mate - you're transmitting your mic only)

That's it!
( djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:30, archived)

^this
*parp*
*cough*

/edit: I can hear music! 7 seconds ahoy :-)
( N3d, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:32, archived)

pfft
tune in and hear Hank wank (ford)
( Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:34, archived)

Assholes to it
I can't be arsed mucking about with mic stuff

(May have had a couple of pints after work)
( Hankster, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:33, archived)

Sorted
:)
( djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:34, archived)

Scuse my stupidness
and ignorance, but what software do you need to play PLS files? Real Player doesn't seem to recognise it, dammit
( Ptolemy the man with the silent pea, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:29, archived)

Ought to, I've used it for that
Try WinAmp
( N3d, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:31, archived)

Great thanks!
(must upgrade my Real player too...)
( Ptolemy the man with the silent pea, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:32, archived)

3am
is not a good time to try and understand the weirdness of U.S. tax stuff.

*cries*
(s0WmVHAwZgpG, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:24, archived)

Regarding the 35-year members (below)
Sorry, I know the answer.
For efficiency, computars often store dates and times as a single number, the amount of milliseconds since midnight, January 1st, 1970. Being one number makes teh maths nice and easy, and you can translate in and out of "human" formats without too much bother.

For some reason, flapper and that other chap have lost their date, so it's defaulted to 0, which means midnight, January 1st, 1970, which was 35 years, 197 days and change ago.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unix_epoch

Here endeth the lesson.

*passes plate around*
( N3d, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:00, archived)

Computars you say? Rathar!
*pat on back for being lully and finding things out*
( hoifbjifbef, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:01, archived)

Suddenly I feel like Eugene from BB
help
( N3d, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:03, archived)

As long as your
laugh and dress sense are less offensive, its not a problem...
(P-nut Obsessive Compulsive Green Day Disorder..., Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:06, archived)

This.
*goes into therapy for knowing who Eugene is*
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:07, archived)

you,ve suddenly gone down in my estimation

( Dill, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:09, archived)

Mine too.
Although I do have to point out that the one "episode" that I sat through last week was the first time I've ever actually watched BB.

And I wanted to kill them all. Slowly & Painfully. (once I'd finally worked out how many there were...)
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:11, archived)

never ever seen it
/smug twat blog
( Dill, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:12, archived)

Gah
*Has Wolfstone on LOUD*

/doesn't care.

Edit : Spreading the word www.b3ta.com/talk/626217
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:14, archived)

Aha
Is lonewolf visiting scotia?

edit/ hopefull I'll post your disc tomorrow
( Dill, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:18, archived)

Nimble Colin I think...

( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:19, archived)

Oh Right

( Dill, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:20, archived)

have you heard Iron Horse?
www.tradmusic.com/groupinfoa.asp?groupID=417

I used to know the fiddler from there back when I used to play bodhran randomly
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:22, archived)

No I haven't
I shall have to investigate next time I am near a record-shop and feeling flush.

Thank you :)
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:24, archived)

who's Eugene?
I can only think of the wee dorky one in Grease 2
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:11, archived)

The annoying twat (which narrows it down I know)
with the annoying whiny voice, buck teeth, and who is really, really, really, boring.
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:12, archived)

huh? where?
[edit] oh are you talking about Big Brother? I've not seen ant of it this year
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:14, archived)

Yes. The first time I've ever watched any of it.
*mutters "never again"*
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:16, archived)

I had a computer once

( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:04, archived)

ooh, clevar

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:03, archived)

I like 1/1/70
:)
( djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:21, archived)

Golden Nose Slim, Golden Nose Slim

I know's where you been
( Dill, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:49, archived)

you sir
are a disgrace, a cad and a bounder.

Fairweather! Fetch my duelling pistol!
( Dirty Bob hasn't been here for ages, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:51, archived)

your bullets cannot harm me
my wings are like a shield of steel

/batfink blog
( Dill, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:59, archived)

Is the answer something to do with salted peanuts?

( hoifbjifbef, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:52, archived)

Purple Pie Pete, Purple Pie Pete

You're lips are like lightning girls melt in the heat, yeah
( Dill, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:56, archived)

good 'ning you rugged Oirishman you
*hugs*
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:53, archived)

Bejeebus girl but ye're lookin well
:)
( Dill, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:55, archived)

I'm feeling considerably better
though suffering post-viral fatigue and my tonsils* are still the size of golf balls


*took me ages to remember the word and I went through nipples and nostrils until I got to it
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:03, archived)

you been ill too long dearie
get yer man to take you somewhere nice for a break, have a nice rest, yer mam 'll look after the wains
( Dill, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:05, archived)

I wish.
the girls are spending time with both grandmothers tomorrow (one with each) so I can have a rest while he works till 7pm :(

next Saturday we're hoping the girls will stay away overnight cos it's our anniversary. could be our first night alone in three years

how's you anyway?
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:09, archived)

hot sweaty and lustful
gonna go for some food soon and some nice wine
( Dill, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:11, archived)

woo
my kind of bloke ;) Mr V gets like that once in a blue moon, and that was yesterday
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:14, archived)

Mr v
is the comic book store guy :)

but I may ask his advice on a new mobile soon
( Dill, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 18:16, archived)

from the BBC news site...
' Meanwhile, the Queen sent a message of defiance to those behind the attacks, saying: "They will not change our way of life." '

Erm... I don't remember seeing the Queen on the tube, or on a bus... like, ever...

wonder if she'd be saying the same thing if they'd bombed some horse-drawn carriages and some limousines?

just my 2p worth.
( calibrax loves teh hamsters (not in that way), Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:38, archived)

That was more like 3p worth in my opinion.
You will be billed for the difference, plus a £20 handling fee.
(MooCow_Byter, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:41, archived)

someone has to say that stuff.
Tony Blair doesn't go on teh tube much either, but he still says it.
( Dirty Bob hasn't been here for ages, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:43, archived)

*slow claps*
And who else is supposed to speak for the public in an official way?

Fuck off and take your biting social commentary with you, you retarded would-be-anarchist.
(Quatermass and teh Shit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:44, archived)

calm down dear
it's only a commercial...



meet mr mouse!
( Dirty Bob hasn't been here for ages, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:46, archived)

who said...
that I was an anarchist?

I want democracy... and I mean proper democracy, not an elective oligarchy like the one we live in.

Now go get your dictionary and look that up, you cretin. Here's hoping you get a paper cut and bleed to death.
( calibrax loves teh hamsters (not in that way), Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:54, archived)

'our' = 'the British', obviously.
She's spokesperson for the country.
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:44, archived)

this
if she was talking about herself it would be "one's way of life"
( asparagus time Is in Brazil., Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:45, archived)

and to be fair
she probably lives with a lot more threat of terrorism than most of us.
( Dirty Bob hasn't been here for ages, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:47, archived)

but...
she also has hundreds of security personnel to keep her safe...
( calibrax loves teh hamsters (not in that way), Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:57, archived)

'ning all
It is teh weekend! I has teh beer, teh sun and teh hair-cut-off.

All I need now is teh woman. Do they sell them at ASDA?

Edit : you wait for a new post, and then two come along at once... and where do you get women these days?
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:27, archived)

no
but they sell melons, and microwaves


/edit and apple corers

/edit2 and cream for burns
(Christopsy, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:27, archived)

pffffft :P

( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:29, archived)

asda.com
AvailableSovietDamesAplenty.com
( Dirty Bob hasn't been here for ages, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:30, archived)

there are a lot of women in Asda
but I don't think they let you take them home with you. it's always worth asking though, just make sure you're polite and brush your teeth before you go.

are you coming out to play on Monday?
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:31, archived)

have 6 giant cucumbers in your trolley
as a subliminal message.
( Dirty Bob hasn't been here for ages, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:32, archived)

Pfft...
And some hot-dogs?
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:33, archived)

too small.
maybe some tongue fron the deli counter?
( Dirty Bob hasn't been here for ages, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:34, archived)

how about
some cocktail sausages...
( calibrax loves teh hamsters (not in that way), Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:39, archived)

I had to brave the deli counter today
and there was ox tongue right at the front. HOW can anyone eat that??
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:41, archived)

it'd be worse
if they just wasted it.

olives. that is what deli counters were invented for.
( Dirty Bob hasn't been here for ages, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:43, archived)

Probably...
I'm an alkymaholic after all...

Who else is supposed to be there?
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:33, archived)

not icklepeach
me, dekazer, mighty badger... I haven't actually advertised this much and it is a school night so maybe that'll be all :P
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:38, archived)

Cool..
Should be out for one or two... :)
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:39, archived)

can i suggest
jade and dekazer? unless you're gay.
( Dirty Bob hasn't been here for ages, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:45, archived)

suggest us for what?

( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:48, archived)

"should be out for one or two"
keep up dear.
( Dirty Bob hasn't been here for ages, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:50, archived)

try here:
clicky clicky
( asparagus time Is in Brazil., Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:32, archived)

Hmmm.. Thaibrides

Membership    2 Months   4 Months  6 Months
20 Girls        $199       $379      $550
50 Girls        $350       $650      $950

50 Girls??? I'm good, but not *that* good...
( The Teviot Moose major 5th., Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:37, archived)

misread that as
Thalidobrides
(geetoo, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:42, archived)

*gets TFH*

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:46, archived)

they must be really horny
as they can't reach to frig themselves.
( Dirty Bob hasn't been here for ages, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:48, archived)

Consider yourself a gnome.
Consider yourself from a small family.
We've taken a poo
And so
It's clear
We're
Responsible for the pong.

/for the sake of a new post
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:24, archived)

thank you

( Hidden Mouse, Sleeping Kitten Gromada? Gromada!, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:27, archived)

S'nothing

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:27, archived)

did we really need a new post?
meh. every time I blink I fall asleep :(
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:27, archived)

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP!
I'm going home.
See you all later!
Well. Not see. Unless you post pictures. I'll only see your typage obviously. But you get the idea.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:30, archived)

How has this guy
b3ta.com/users/profile.php?id=37903

been here as long as that?
( debar - Lord High Expositioner, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:02, archived)

L33t haxx0r?

( hoifbjifbef, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:04, archived)

Damn your girly eyes to the very depths of Hades!

( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:06, archived)

*flutters eyelashes*
Quite a breeze.
( hoifbjifbef, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:07, archived)

Looks like l33t hax to me.

( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:04, archived)

how bizarre
does anyone have any top staying awake tips? I keep dozing off sitting here and I've got parental responsibilities
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:05, archived)

nipple clamps dipped in coffee,
attached to a car battery
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:07, archived)

nice idea
but I don't have a car battery
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:08, archived)

Mains will do
just as well.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:11, archived)

Transfer responsibility
to the other parent?

Or drug them both. Either way, you wouldn't like my suggestions otherwise.

(Caffeine in large amounts, or lots of exercise)
( Dekazer, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:11, archived)

Mr V gone to mts
don't like most caffeine sources, and can't have too much while breastfeeding anyway
not well enough to exercise - feel like I'm suffering narcolepsy right now, something I've not had for years and years and I think it's because I walked back from the doctor's this morning via the supermarket. I was so exhausted I had to sit down and do absolutely nothing for fifteen minutes before I could unpack the shopping. mentioned to the GP how tired the slightest thing was making me and he says it's normal after a 'flu virus and just to rest as much as possible
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:14, archived)

Beat the shit out of your kids
should perk you up a bit and in 30 years when they're Tory back-benchers they can go on about how "it never did them any harm"
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:14, archived)

Do what that bloke did
and make espresso with red bull, with grounded ProPlus added.
( ArthurTheRat, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:26, archived)

and an interesting QOTW answer
very topical
( Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:06, archived)

Maybe it's gods login

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:07, archived)

Same as this isn't it?
b3ta.com/users/profile.php?id=1
( djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:09, archived)

time travel.

( asparagus time Is in Brazil., Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:13, archived)

The hosting company I'm with just shut down
and now I'm left with an email with no POP3 ability, and a website that has been wiped from existance except for my harddrive

Anybody got a good company they can recommend? Not too fussed about the space I'm allowed really, its more the bandwidth, but it's only a small site, so I'm not wanting to pay much.

(I was with ludicrously cheap Axe Hosting before, 6gig BW for about £7.. heh, doubt that'll be beaten)

Hosting companies called www.whatareweyouyourlowcosthostingcompanywebsitefindingslaves.com will not reaaallly be appreciated.
( MCQ Cartoons n' shit: bagowank.com, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:41, archived)

Dreamhost?

( ArthurTheRat, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:42, archived)

YAY Dreamhost
signup and i can get money
www.dreamhost.com/rewards.cgi?miniuzi
(miniuzi, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 19:13, archived)

BoTL and I
use pickaweb and they're really good - excellent technical support as well if something fouls up. Good rates too - we pay £10 a month for a gig of bandwidth and message board and stuff...it's all good.
( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:43, archived)

heh thats quite steep
compared to me, i forgot to mention that the £7 for my thingy was for a year

i really have no idea how they managed to give me 6 gig bandwidth for an entire year for seven pounds, but they did.

which is why i'm kinda pissed off that they've shut up shop.
( MCQ Cartoons n' shit: bagowank.com, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:45, archived)

That's probably why they shut up shop if they
were giving everybody that much for pretty much fuck all...
( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:47, archived)

yeah quite true.
talking of hosting, yay for boardborking =/

damn fridays
( MCQ Cartoons n' shit: bagowank.com, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:48, archived)

See below
$5 a month for 10gig bandwidth, unlimited mysql databases, emails etc
( elusive I'm not really here. You're imagining me, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:45, archived)

yeah that looks good to me!
i wont find a deal like Axe again, and 400meg + 10 gig is pretty good to me :)

Thanks dood!
( MCQ Cartoons n' shit: bagowank.com, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:46, archived)

Blimey...
certainly come down in price a bit haven't they
( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:50, archived)

'fouls up' you fucking gayer
/Nelson Munz
(t3d on FTLFM now http://83.149.101.8:8070/listen.pls, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:50, archived)

I must've missed that episode

I'll see you in hell! And come again...

/Apu
( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:50, archived)

ning dude.
you be on FTL or TFL tonight?
(t3d on FTLFM now http://83.149.101.8:8070/listen.pls, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:52, archived)

Howdy
It'll be TFL as I'm not cool enough to be allowed on FTL. I'd best get good and drunk before hand though so shall stop in at the offy on my way home.

I'll put a link up a bit later on...
( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:54, archived)

and I will turn up uninvited
like a foster child
(t3d on FTLFM now http://83.149.101.8:8070/listen.pls, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:56, archived)

And if you're lucky you'll
be beaten like a ginger stepchild...
( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:57, archived)

POP3?
Does that mean it's fluent in over six million forms of communication?
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:44, archived)

Go and stand in the corner
and wank think about what you've done.
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:45, archived)

Beaten by a mile
And they are fantastically reliable too
asmallorange.com/services/hosting/
( elusive I'm not really here. You're imagining me, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:44, archived)

Try
www.apewidth.co.uk
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:47, archived)

fuckmonkey.

*slinks off*
( MCQ Cartoons n' shit: bagowank.com, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:48, archived)

*strokes in a manner
which is at once soothing, apologetic and lewd*
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:50, archived)

*forgives*
*offers slice of carrot cake*
( MCQ Cartoons n' shit: bagowank.com, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:51, archived)

*flys into a rage*
*squishes carrot cake into carpet*
*goes off to get a real cake*
*remembers that carrot cake is actually lully*
*eats carrot cake out of carpet*

Thanks!
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:53, archived)

*backs away*
anytime!!
( MCQ Cartoons n' shit: bagowank.com, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:54, archived)

I use
www.web-mania.com

£20 a year, all the trimmings, 6gig/month BW
( spiny - things are looking up, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:49, archived)

ooh oooh!
and spiny takes the lead!

i prefer a year bill, especially when its not as big.

6 gig did me fine, 10 gig is a little OTT for my needs.
( MCQ Cartoons n' shit: bagowank.com, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:52, archived)

Webmania are
shit. I used to have no end of problems with them, across all 5 sites I was hosting with them. Just try getting them on the phone - the acid test in my opinion.

Try:
www.lunarpages.com

If you can afford the extra (they're £60 a year). They're jolly good.
1GB webspace
40GB Bandwidth p/m
Unlimited IMAP/POP3 email
Loads of other stuff, including control panel etc.
Great support - they answer emails within a few minutes. You can talk to them freefone in the states, from here in the UK as well.
(8-Ball, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 17:31, archived)

'noon cunts
How are we all?

I was thinking of doing a broadcast later if anyone would be interested or if no one else is thinking of doing one. I'll try not to fall asleep half way through this time...
( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:37, archived)

you fell asleep? :)
old age doesn't come itself...
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:40, archived)

Yep fell asleep on the job again...
I'm that uninteresting that I bore myself...
( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:44, archived)

I got my degree results.
*points at username*
( King Ralph is drunk, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:41, archived)

Hurrah!
Well done, you!

*offers a celebratory jaffa cake*
( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:45, archived)

Why thank you!
*takes jaffa cake and scampers off*
( King Ralph is drunk, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:49, archived)

I just doned a pitchah.
www.b3ta.com/board/4864152
( hoifbjifbef, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:41, archived)

that scares me a bit
I made a pikchur yesterday
www.b3ta.com/board/4859457
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:45, archived)

FURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVVVVVVVVVVVEEEEEEEE!

( hoifbjifbef, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:46, archived)

I done a pitcha of me.
It's in my profile.
But I said that already.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:49, archived)

well I know what my nightmares tonight will be
*twitch*
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:53, archived)

He looks meaner than he is.
Honest.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:55, archived)

Excellent
Excellent indeed (scroll down a bit)
( elusive I'm not really here. You're imagining me, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:46, archived)

Blimey well done!
Although it gives me the right fucking fear that a b3tan will be in charge of a plane.

*buys a bicycle*
( Benny Tied To A Tree As much use as Anne Frank's drumkit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:49, archived)

Hehe
I'm home now and on working Internet and, oh looky here - I've got a third of a bottle of red sitting here next to me.

Hope work's going ok :P
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:35, archived)

Argh, you bastard!
Actually, you have the right idea.

Fuck this, I'm off to the pub. Then to dinner with some mates where we will eat the finest of foods and drinks several bottles of nice wine. Followed by a few irish coffees, then more pubbage by which point I shoudl be nicely numb.
( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:35, archived)

And now I have a jasmine joss stick burning
and I don't care if that makes me a hippy *sulks*
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:38, archived)

Bah!
Spam the hippy!
*spam spam spam spam spam spam...*
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:40, archived)

But like no man, I'm a pacifist
*eats lentils*
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:42, archived)

*pauses*
*spam spam spam spam spam spam...*
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:44, archived)

teh RAGE!
at least i have a night in the casino ahead, playing cards and drinking beers (and hopefully winning money).

or i'd get really mad.
( Dirty Bob hasn't been here for ages, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:38, archived)

In fairness
I may have a night of sitting in by myself like a real sad bastard :(

For a start I just found out my bike service will probably cost £200, on top of everything else this month (a lot without going into detail!) I'm going to be pimping my arse out for a fiver a go in no time.
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:40, archived)

*Pays five pound*

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:42, archived)

Dig in

( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:43, archived)

Well I'm lighter by £339 today
after a service/running repairs on my car.

Bah!
( Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:52, archived)

Ouch
Harsh mate - expensive hobby isn't it :(
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:55, archived)

Gizza swig.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:39, archived)

No this wine is definitely not
monkey wine.

Actually it's Goiya which is cheap as chips but very drinkable.
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:41, archived)

Mmmmmmm...
Chips and wine.
Yum yum yum.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:43, archived)

You
really are a skiving cunt.
( Dekazer, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:39, archived)

You know how smug that smug guy holding the croissant looking smug looks?
I am looking smugger.
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:41, archived)

I am bored
and I want to go for a pint now and nobody's around. I may go and drink myself into a stupor alone just to spite them all.
( Dekazer, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:43, archived)

You can come and have a pint with me if you like.
I'm really fucking off now, g'night all!
( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:43, archived)

nn tiger
hope you get some flatlander lovin'!
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:46, archived)

I would
if you were in Edinburgh :P

G'night :D
( Dekazer, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:49, archived)

Meh - hop on a train
and come down here and ride me like a pony
( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:47, archived)

No more trains tonight :(

( Dekazer, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:51, archived)

Fuck me!
I thought it was thursday! Just noticed.
(tacpprm has a mmrpcat, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:28, archived)

*FUCKS YOU*

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:29, archived)

*fucks*

( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:30, archived)

Yup.
You have to wait another week 6 days for Thursday.
( Shoosh up your lips Not state-funded, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:31, archived)

no
in another week he'll have missed it again
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:32, archived)

There's only one mature way to settle a dispute like this:
FIGHT!
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:33, archived)

*nipple cripple*

( Shoosh up your lips Not state-funded, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:34, archived)

Unless it looks like
this its not a real fight.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:37, archived)

why is there
a bloke with no trousers climbing over the wall?
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:42, archived)

oh please
I'm currently breastfeeding a baby with seven teeth. you don't scare me
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:37, archived)

Did monster munch leave yet ?
I wanted to tell him to fuck off one last time....
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:15, archived)

*sigh*
What amateur dramatics has occurred today then?
( ArthurTheRat, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:18, archived)

Eh ?

( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:19, archived)

monster munch is leaving,
therefore some sort of dramatics must have happened while I was away.
( ArthurTheRat, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:19, archived)

If I understand right,
he's got another job that will hinder his internet access.
Or something.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:21, archived)

internet hot young cock

Anyway, I'm fucking off home now for two days away from bombings and bumbings.

Your all gay.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:25, archived)

Fuck off you utter cunt.








_{have nice weekend!}
( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:29, archived)

He's starting a new
job and actually wants to work for a couple of months before going back to being a work-shy layabout on here.
( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:21, archived)

He decided to go
to a board where there were no gingers.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:21, archived)

Mission accomplished.

( ArthurTheRat, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:24, archived)

Yes.
No.
He clearly doesn't know that Monster Munch is leaving us.

*restarts the sobbing*
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:20, archived)

sobbing wanking into the hollow eye socket of a long dead meerkat.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:22, archived)

you are hawt for his tasty puffed corn

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:19, archived)

It's more
the chemical pish that makes him taste of "roast beef" that gets my man milk spurting.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:20, archived)

Hello All
I've been internetless for the past week, so I am hoping that everyone is okay after yesterdays events (you've all talked it to death etc etc i know, just saying)

How are we all though...I'm going to be a pilot...woo!
( elusive I'm not really here. You're imagining me, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:12, archived)

I'm going to be a copper!
Woo-woo woo-woo woo-woo!

Yes, I'm not dead. How are you?
( Reid got it going on like Donkey Kong, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:13, archived)

you'd make a good bus conductor
hohoho
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:15, archived)

fantastic
As I genuinely am going to be a pilot, which makes me very very happy indeed
( elusive I'm not really here. You're imagining me, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:17, archived)

RAF pilot? Airline? Al Quaida?

What sort of pilot/size of plane/civillian target?
( Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:23, archived)

Airline eventually
Been accepted into a rather expensive training program, but the intention will be to go straight into British Airways on A320s/737s once it's all over
( elusive I'm not really here. You're imagining me, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:31, archived)

Well done.
I'll have a drink for you tonight.
( Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:50, archived)

I've had one alcoholic drink
already and many many many more shall follow! I encourage you all to follow suit! Yay.
( Smokey Bacon Crisps smell good, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:18, archived)

In about an hour or so I will be in the pub
and about an hour after that i will be on my way to getting pished.

Apologies in advance for any late night drunken posting and/or text messaging.
( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Fri 8 Jul 2005, 16:19, archived)