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[challenge entry] Finally, now he's Home Alone - this is it!
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:52, archived)
# The sex tape they tried to ban
:D
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:55, archived)
# Shamone!
Nicely :)
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:59, archived)
# ta!
(grabs crotch, spins)
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 22:34, archived)
# This is what?
Ahhh Jesus juice! :D
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 15:18, archived)
# Run, Kevin!
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 16:51, archived)
# Anagram:
SHIT IT IS.
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 21:19, archived)
# Anagram:
His i-tits.
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 21:20, archived)
# IS HIS TIT
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 22:36, archived)
# I KNOW THERE'S NO PICTURE BUT I NEED YOUR HELP PLEASE!!
Hi all - can you help please? (I don't have time to do a pic so I hope my previous entries will suffice).

A close friend had a very bad car accident and after making it out of a coma, is now stuck in hospital fighting terrible depression while healing. He isn't able to move much and has stopped talking now.

We'd like to get some audio books for him to try and ease the pain/depression but don't know what to get - this is where i need your help.

He likes: fantasy books, games of thrones type stuff, sci fi or any sort of saga/cleverly written books.

I know you guys love all this sort of thing - Can anyone recommend some audio books to help my friend?

thank you (and I'll post a pic again when I have more time)

(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:22, archived)
# "I know you guys love all this sort of thing" ...
... not me, I hate all that fantasy bollocks.
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:23, archived)
# ok babe - not you then
Apologies for sweeping generalisations.
(I'm not a big fan either to be honest)
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:25, archived)
# Apparently he liked "The Wheel Of Time"
so anything like that.
xxx
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:28, archived)
# Has he done Philip Pullman's Dark Materials?
Not quite lord of the rings but its fantasy stuff with talking bears and witches, and was a very enjoyable read
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:28, archived)
# thank you - great shout!
xx
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:28, archived)
# Oh, dear fucking God! She's supposed to be helping the poor guy *out* of a depression

And I don't know how old the patient is, but that Dark Materials stuff is a bloody childrens' book.
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:31, archived)
# oh -he's a fully formed adult!
lol!
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:40, archived)
# ignore mr misery pants
Dark Materials are a great read/listen
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:49, archived)
# So are Lord of the rings and Game of Thrones aren't they?
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:45, archived)
# GoT definitely not for kids!
I read Dark Materials as an adult and enjoyed it.
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 15:51, archived)
# What's a bit of friendly castration, torture, eye-popping. head-crushing, tits and arse between kids?
Not to mention the cunting potty-mouths. Do you think he's actually seen it?
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 19:00, archived)
# audible.co.uk... part of amazon
download them from site... register him an account and let him choose.
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:31, archived)
# Also
have you considered some of the classic radio plays...
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Journey_into_Space
this is a classic and there are around 60 30 min episodes
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:40, archived)
# cool- of course
Brilliant idea - thanks :)
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:42, archived)
# totally would, but he's not very mobile so can't really chose
but will go and poke around audible for him.

thank you!
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:41, archived)
# Hey Freddy
One of the youtube channels I follow has an offer on where you can sign up to audible and get one download for free - www.audibletrial.com/drunkenpeasants
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:48, archived)
# Hey Emvee!!
How are you? Saw rough cut of Andy's film - it's cracking but there's some weirdo on the beach.... lol!!

thanks for the advice, nice, we love free audio books :)

hope to see you soon!
xx
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:50, archived)
# Serious now ...
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:34, archived)
# thank you for all your help
Suggestions are great, cheers
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:42, archived)
# Which book is it where Smiley fights a dragon on a unicorn?
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:48, archived)
# The Smiley one is precisely what I was about to suggest.
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:59, archived)
# Hitch Hikers Guide to the Galaxy
All the books have been made into full-cast radio plays (in fact, it started out as a full-cast radio play before it became a book). About 13 hours of material, and it's all great:

www.amazon.co.uk/Hitchhikers-Guide-Galaxy-Complete-Series/dp/0563504196/
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:50, archived)
# This gets my vote
Sounds right up the right street. I'd also suggest the Milligan war memoirs if they are on audio. He addressess depression and fish out of water in a way it is easy to engage with. It is light hearted on the surface, but you can read deeper when you are ready.
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 23:33, archived)
# I google for free audio books
http://www.openculture.com/freeaudiobooks

I don't know what this is like, but first thing that appeared on google.

Books will be random gendres.
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:50, archived)
#
If sci-fi extends to cyberpunk, then Ready Player One is the best escapist books I've read for a long time and that has an audiobook. Probably specifically aimed at people who were kids in the 80s, though.

And might be incredibly dull, but all the ancient classics like The Iliad tend to be available with well regarded actors reading them.
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:52, archived)
# How about radio comedy series?
There's such delights as the Hitch-hiker's guide to the galaxy (5 series), ElvenQuest (fantasy humour), Old Harry's Game... (I have shedloads of stuff like that)
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:53, archived)
# Elvenquest was brilliant!
Old Harry's game too...
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 15:09, archived)
# The Holy Bible.
Our LORD AND SAVIOUR is obviously PUNISHING your HEATHEN friend for his SINS!
PRAY FOR HIM BROTHER!
And if he doesn't start healing IMMEDIATELY then HE HAS INCURRED GOD'S DISPLEASURE AND MUST BE PURGED FOR HIS HERESIES!
BURN HIM! BURN THE HERETIC! BURN HIM IN THE PURIFYING FLAMES TO SHOW HIM GOD'S LOVE!
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 15:01, archived)
# You're just saying that because kittens are soft and cute!
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 15:03, archived)
# And tasty.
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 15:04, archived)
# when I said fantasy, was thinking of something not so far fetched
(ooo controversial)
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 15:05, archived)
# *Puts on Big WitchFinder hat*
REPENT SINNER!
REPENT LEST YE BE CAST INTO THE FLAMES!
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 15:09, archived)
#
Jesus dies at the end.
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 19:49, archived)
# to everyone who replied - I thank you
B3ta has show true kindness :)


Now get back to killing things with hammers!
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 15:26, archived)
# YAY! LET'S BASTARDING CUNTS IN THE FUCK!
\o/
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 17:30, archived)
# Iain M Banks, Culture series
Read by Peter Kenny

Chronologically, until Look to Windward

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Culture#Novels
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 15:32, archived)
# ^
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 16:52, archived)
# *upvotes*
(, Tue 19 Aug 2014, 8:01, archived)
# Dan Simmons' Hyperion/Fall of Hyperion/Endymion/Rise of Endymion
Big space opera sagary epic - and very very good.

Neal Stephenson's Anathem

(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 15:50, archived)
# Ah yes, the Hyperion series is great
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 15:59, archived)
# A certain Bay frequented by Pirates
may have a fine torrent of 100 top sci-fi audiobooks. But I wouldn't know anything about that.

*whistles innocently*
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 16:01, archived)
# michael loves the buccaneer cock
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 16:10, archived)
# Good Sci Fi/Fantasy what I have read recently
Mervyn Peake's Gormenghast books
Philip K Dick's Ubik
Richard Matheson's I am Legend (possibly a bit depressing)
Frederick Pohl's Gateway
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 16:05, archived)
# The dark tower series by stephen king.
They are fucking aces
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 18:13, archived)
# ^ This one.
The narrator is superb.
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 19:04, archived)
# Ignore all that bollocks. If he's depressed then he needs 'Who on earth is Tom Baker'
His self read autobiography - it's brilliant!
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 22:03, archived)
# Of course!
That's instant joy.
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 22:13, archived)
# pick up some nice book
Smoke & Mirrors? Neil Gaiman short stories. Then sit down and read it to your friend. A couple of those are a joy to read too.
(, Tue 19 Aug 2014, 8:00, archived)
[challenge entry] Was originally Robocop vs Terminator

But then I found out that already exists...
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 12:32, archived)
# Bad Bots Bad Bots, what you gonna do? what you gonna do when they come for you?
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:20, archived)
# Stay out of trouble?
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 17:10, archived)
# Bad Bots 2
Or... Bad Bots Rebooted
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 14:22, archived)
# Bad Bots 3 - Bit Rot
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 17:15, archived)
[challenge entry]
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 11:54, archived)
# oof!
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 12:06, archived)
# he died
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 12:21, archived)
# Hopefully he's running around having laughs with his buddy Robin now
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 12:27, archived)
# he's quadriplegic
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 12:30, archived)
# not with the miracle of god in heaven he's not
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 12:50, archived)
# God praise you HT !
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 13:37, archived)
# also wesley snipes went to jail
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 12:31, archived)
# this happened
it's mentioned in the new explodables film as a joke
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 12:46, archived)
[challenge entry] Ouch!
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 12:46, archived)
# Hahaha
:D
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 12:56, archived)
# so wrong
so b3ta

click!
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 13:19, archived)
[challenge entry] screw you guys, I'm eating the goat.
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 10:07, archived)
# nice
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 10:13, archived)
# Haha
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 11:52, archived)
# Splendid!
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 12:32, archived)
# :D
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 12:57, archived)
# 'ning
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 9:25, archived)
# Paul Hardcastle in happier times
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 9:26, archived)
# I like his piano trousers
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 9:38, archived)
# like a techno cossack
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 9:39, archived)
# Strangest of all the Dylan tracks
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 13:19, archived)
# pikachu, I choose you!
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 9:27, archived)
# my name is jacob dyer and i live in bristol. it is fantastic. i sound like barnaby bear. i like barnaby bear. one time he went to france. i went to france. but some kid burnt my neck. i didnt like it.
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 9:21, archived)
# my name is father christmas and i live in lapland. it is fantastic. i bring your seasonal gifts. i like seasonal gifts. one time you lit a fire. i went down your chimney, but the flames burnt my feet. i didnt like it
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 9:25, archived)
# ^ make this person a mod, now.
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 9:26, archived)
# I'm overqualified
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 9:36, archived)
# I'm sure after all these years Jacob has a deep manly voice
and doesn't get burnt by kids anymore
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 9:26, archived)
# He's an international youtube superstar now.
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 15:02, archived)
# *filenames*
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 11:37, archived)
# dinner dinner dinner dinner burhtman
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 22:25, archived)
# The Dark Neargh!
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 22:59, archived)
#
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 2:04, archived)
# Come and see the violence inherent in the system.
Help help I'm being oppressed.
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 2:57, archived)
# Put some pants on, and go make them yourself!
Industrialization, and manufacturing, is not predicated on capitalism, you knob.
 
Also: breed some more of those slappers with the cracking tits.
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 3:51, archived)
# You scored high Marx for that pic
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 8:45, archived)
#
I appreciate that the social conflicts inherent within capitalism may be driving us towards an inevitable outcome, but where are my fucking guns?

OI! SANTA! WHERE'S ME FUCKING BIKE?
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 16:26, archived)
# I just clicked 'I like this', but didn't actually mean to.
Fuck.
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 16:55, archived)
# Everything's fucked
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 7:04, archived)
# :D
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 9:15, archived)
# :D
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 9:11, archived)
# Today I have been mostly trying to get thrown out of Madame Tussauds


The crowds of onlookers were not impressed at all... or the wife!
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 21:29, archived)
# They used to have a Patch Adams
section in the chamber of horrors.
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 21:49, archived)
# That's terrible behaviour from that guy!
'anging's too good for 'im
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 21:58, archived)
# You posed the waxwork of Phil Mitchell with the one of Robin Williams and took a photo?
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 21:59, archived)
# Uh oh!
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 22:01, archived)
# :D
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 22:08, archived)
# Haha
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 22:12, archived)
# The Orkan Strangler.
So nonchalant as he goes about his business.
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 23:19, archived)
# {:-)
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 2:58, archived)
# YES
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 7:03, archived)
# Either Williams' head was very large, or yours is very big.
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 1:04, archived)
# You keraaayyzeee guy!
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 9:27, archived)
[challenge entry] Thundercat and Lightfoot (1974).
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 18:32, archived)
# Well, that was five minutes well spent...
(, Tue 19 Aug 2014, 18:48, archived)
#
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 15:08, archived)
# Fuck !
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 15:14, archived)
# Mr FUCKniverse
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 15:19, archived)
# FUCK
freebase has let himself go :(
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 15:27, archived)
# just wait, he'll pull out the big guns any second
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 15:41, archived)
# The Full Uncle Monty.
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 21:12, archived)
# pffffft
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 15:37, archived)
# proud pose from the beatmeister
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 15:41, archived)
# That suits him.
I wonder if this does...

(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 16:28, archived)
# hahahahaha
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 19:51, archived)
# Pills, Thrills & Bodybuilding.
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 23:35, archived)
# wonderful
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 23:59, archived)
# hahahahahahahaha
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 3:43, archived)
# fuck
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 17:15, archived)
# I've been thinking of something to say about this
but all I can come up with is FUCK, on every detail
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 7:06, archived)
# who remembers this old advert?


I believe this played in the cinemas before screenings of Last Tango In Paris...

different times then eh folks?
back in the day eh?

ah the 70's...

(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 3:02, archived)
# did you know the otter is extremely polite
and will tell a white lie if it would spare upsetting someone over a personal matter



(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 3:06, archived)
# also, otters fib is an anagram of frostbite
so suck it!



:P xx
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 3:06, archived)
# NO, just no.
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 3:34, archived)
# yes, just yes :D
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 16:43, archived)
# ewwww fuck!

(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 5:37, archived)
# you loves it!
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 16:43, archived)
# hahaha
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 3:34, archived)
# Oo-ar!
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 11:25, archived)
# Have any of them
been Yewtreed yet?
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 13:00, archived)
# they're next in line after the Weetabix skinheads
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 13:48, archived)
# ah the good old day
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 16:44, archived)
# The Corona bubbles are going to end up in the nonce wing, that's for sure.
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 18:06, archived)
# Fo sho' !!
(, Mon 18 Aug 2014, 15:07, archived)
# we'll see about that!
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 15:27, archived)
[challenge entry] Bitch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 1:45, archived)
#
Bitch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 2:46, archived)
# Cutch Bassidy and the Kundance Sid
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 15:27, archived)
# Excellent!
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 5:39, archived)
[challenge entry] not worth a new thread
or probably even posting because I gave up. meh.
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 11:25, archived)
# Ha-ha!
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 11:25, archived)
[challenge entry] Buddy Movies with Moving Bodies
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 0:48, archived)
# Bee stung lips.
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 1:05, archived)
# pant pant pant
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 1:46, archived)
# Wonderful!
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 5:40, archived)
# nice action
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 10:24, archived)
# A lovely thing.
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 11:24, archived)
[challenge entry] er......... Planes 3 ?
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 0:39, archived)
[challenge entry] Marxist - Lennonist Stuff..
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 0:14, archived)
# ha ha ha ha
That's terrible
*clicks
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 1:40, archived)
# Thanks.
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 3:22, archived)
# ;D
(, Sat 16 Aug 2014, 21:41, archived)
# Nice!
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 0:34, archived)
# yet again I'm astounded by my Photoshop skilz
(, Sat 16 Aug 2014, 17:52, archived)
#
(, Sat 16 Aug 2014, 17:18, archived)
# Nice.
(, Sat 16 Aug 2014, 17:21, archived)
# nice hat
(, Sat 16 Aug 2014, 17:54, archived)
# It's all done with very thin wires
the hourglass isn't really floating
(, Sat 16 Aug 2014, 18:43, archived)
# Magnets!
Fucking shitty magnets.
(, Sat 16 Aug 2014, 20:40, archived)
# !!
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 4:38, archived)
# B3tadead :(
(, Sat 16 Aug 2014, 21:38, archived)
# Cool.
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 0:33, archived)
# I'm not gonna fuck with that chap :D
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 3:07, archived)
# Time is the fire we all burn in.
(, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 5:41, archived)

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