Facepalm
Let's talk about moments that make you question your own ability to function properly as a human being.

I once texted a deaf boy lyrics to a song.

alt: Gigs, what was your favorite? Who do you want to see?
I'd like to see Lil Wayne. Oh yes.
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 18:03, 105 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Time for a link
www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-berkshire-13013076

My questions is "WHAT THE FUCK?" Is anyone prepared to admit to being into this kind of thing?

Alt: Weirdest sexual fetish that either you are in to, or you know someone who is in to it. No 2nd hand stories 'my mate met someone once...' type stories.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Thu 9 Jun 2011, 16:14, 75 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Breasts
Amberl has them and is saddened for the state of humanity.

How would you cheer up Amberl to get a look at her breasts?
(Bazongaloid, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 15:06, 125 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Aber's thread reminded me of something
Last night Ms Foxtrot's sister blithely said "Old films are shit". Obviously I couldn't let this lie. She qualified her statement by saying that she watches films to be entertained and not to analyse subtext an' that (she didn't like Inception. Seriously), and when asked if she'd seen Citizen Kane, replied "Saw the first half hour, it was shit".

Is there any argument to support the idea that new films are better than old? Draw the lines between the eras wherever you like. To what extent has CGI rendered decent storytelling redundant?

Alt: something a bit less South Bank Show. Current celebrity wank fantasy, or summat.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 13:45, 247 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

From one of the discussions on the previous thread
I do believe that humanity is doing much better as a whole than we were a few hundred years ago. OK, there's plenty of room for improvement and there are places that have got stuck on time and haven't changed a bit their human rights, but in general, things are fairer than they used to be.

Which things do you think were better some hundred years ago? And worse? Do you think we have improved or are doing worse every time?

Alt. Ok, ok, lunch.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Jun 2011, 12:09, 90 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

So slut walk.
What's your opinion on it, are you going to join in?
Is this modern feminism?
(PsychoChomp, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 10:31, 293 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

QOTW Vote
Vote for the new Question of the Week

THAT IS ALL
( Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 10:03, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Why b3ta doesn't have profile pictures


Ok sure, it's what's on the inside that counts and you guys are all SO so very witty...but is there anyone on here that doesn't have a face like a bag of broken biscuits and hasn't been bullied?

Anyone wanna show face?
(cheerymaddox 'Quite cute when not talking', Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:32, 100 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I'm slightly hungover and I need a cuddle but I have an egg salad sammich so that will have to do.
What does the day hold in store for you?

Alt: Why do we do this to ourselves?

Oh God! I don't remember changing my sig. What the hell does it mean?
( girlinthehole, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 8:13, 98 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Late night lurkers...
your place is here, tell us something interesting.

Not you Rory, you can sod off.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 8 Jun 2011, 22:58, 23 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Nu fred!
I've died my hair and I look oohhh! at least six months younger.

Keep young and beautiful.
It's your duty to be beautiful.
Keep young and beautiful if you want to be loved.

*charlstons*

What do you do to keep looking young and beautiful?
( girlinthehole, Wed 8 Jun 2011, 18:40, 148 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

DEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAD THREEEEEEEEEAAAD
I made sweet chilli jam yesterday. It's utterly brilliant. What've you made?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 8 Jun 2011, 16:51, 123 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Everyone is clearly so disgusted by Al that they don't want to post in his thread.
Understandable really.

It's Wednesday and thus too early for talk of the weekend. What should we talk about?

alt: what should we definitely not talk about?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 8 Jun 2011, 14:33, 191 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

HELL YEAH!
I just got a ticket to see The Darkness in Shepherds Bush tonight, any other London B3tans who get tickets and want to meet up for a quick pint before they come on stage at 9pm let me know*

* offer of pint only applies to people I like. Terms and Conditions apply
(Bazongaloid, Wed 8 Jun 2011, 13:36, 60 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

This is your last 24 hours, when the clock ticks for the final time, you shall die peacefully and painlessly in that moment.
What would you do in this time?

//edit//
inspired by this very humbling page: alicepyne.blogspot.com/
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 8 Jun 2011, 13:09, 51 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Well, this is boring.
I have just royally fucked my wrist by using my can crusher to sort out my recycling. What dubious injuries have you caused yourself that meant you had to explain, using the words "it's not what you think"?

Alt: lunch, or something.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 8 Jun 2011, 12:00, 101 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

*flies in to ask question*
Anyone here use the Apple Time Machine to back up files?

Mine works fine with my desktop, but keeps causing my laptop to freeze. Does anyone else have this problem, and how do you solve it?

Feel free to revive mac vs PC wars. I suspect you probably will anyway.
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Wed 8 Jun 2011, 11:45, 14 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I'm off work today being a bit under the weather
can anyone provide me with useful links for fathers day shopping?

EDIT: I'm hoping to find something suitably geeky, like the towel with '42' on it I found for his birthday.

Alt q: is it pretentious to keep a diary?
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Wed 8 Jun 2011, 11:08, 40 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I just sold my laptop because we are flat broke
In 5 months I have gone from owning 5 computers to owning none. Now I don't own a computer what on earth shall I do with my life?

alt. Do you think that in this day an age you could manage without a home computer?
( Peej, Wed 8 Jun 2011, 10:57, 11 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Hello, good morning and welcome.
On Sunday, my daughter goes to Spain for three weeks. This, coupled with Lusty's job in the hospitality industry (and therefore frequent evening and weekend work), leaves my weekends worryingly empty.

Can you please help me to think of some cheap and healthy things I could do to prevent my doing Bad Things Which I Cannot Afford? I will of course 'fuck off' and 'kill myself' so no need to pass on these helpful tips. I will also already be 'doing' 'your mum' as well as 'my mum' etc. etc.

Alt: my friend texted me last night to tell me that he's bought me a pair of German Army sneakers (actual Army issue ones) and wants no money for them. When did someone last suprise you with their generosity and how did they do this? And yes, I said 'sneakers' - do you want a fucking fight about it?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 8 Jun 2011, 8:21, 205 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Write another b3tan's dating profile.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jun 2011, 20:47, 144 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Social Networking
If you had to limit your friend list on your chosen social networking site to only twenty people could you? What criteria would you use to weigh up potential winners? Would family matter? colleagues, friends you see in person? What clique of friends would be first to go? B3tans perhaps?

Alt: Favourite website to just pass the time on? APART FROM B3TA (Thanks Kristine)
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 7 Jun 2011, 18:59, 108 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

O!! It's nearly my 4th B3ta birthday!!!
How on earth shall I celebrate?
( curvylittlegoth heard the voices in your head on, Tue 7 Jun 2011, 18:31, 21 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Tell us about your first b3ta b4$h
Did you screw your sister? Punch or headbutt someone? Take the IRL too seriously?

What would you do differently?

alt: What big plans do you have for the summer? Holiday or something you want to do before summer's over?
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 7 Jun 2011, 15:59, 166 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

GEEK ALERT
I am probably waaaay behind the field on this, but loads of websites have this thing where if you enter the Konami code ( up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A) awesome stuff happens.

This page has my favourite - but seriously who was typing it on every webpage looking for it?! lockfale.com/ (also howdy hi fellow Cracked readers!)

What delighfully things have you discovered that everyone else can call shit?
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 7 Jun 2011, 15:32, 13 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I've had one of the best weekends of my life and had an epiphany moment on the Sunday just gone.
When did you last make any drastic changes and did it work out for you?

alt: Up the bum, no harm done?
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 7 Jun 2011, 14:25, 82 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I call lunch
and a what have you acheived so far today kind of thread.

Alt: Fuck off to the shops and by me some chocolate. What will you bring back?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 7 Jun 2011, 12:44, 252 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

New thread
www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1394903/Rebecca-Colleen-Christie-jailed-25-years-allowing-daughter-Brandi-Wulf-STARVE-death-played-World-Warcraft.html

So are computer games to blame for this, or is it the internet, or is it something to do with people being stupid and/or mentally ill?
(PsychoChomp, Tue 7 Jun 2011, 11:50, 57 replies, latest was 15 years ago)