
The government of any country which doesn't employ defensive strategists to think about new ways in which their country might be harmed is not doing it's job properly.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 14:50, Reply)

The one that puzzled me was all the piss taking Rumsfeld got for his "know unknowns" speech. I thought it was an excellent way to explain the basics of intelligence gathering to a room full of idiots who were bleating "how could you let this happen? Why didn't you know?" He did actually miss one out though, "unknown knowns", where you have information but fail to realise its relevance or pertinence.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 15:28, Reply)

on the back of a military that 'defends' it's country with a military budget which is more than virtually everyone else on the planets combined
and yet failed to detect the rise of a bunch of psychotic Wahhabi hard-right fascists on it's radar, born in a country which was supposedly one of it's allies
or something
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 15:52, Reply)

Two of the 911 hijackers were well know to be senior Al Qaeda operatives by the CIA, but inexplicably they were allowed to enter the states, and the FBI was not alerted to their presence. Although they were 'known', what they were up to wasn't, and they weren't being watched. Unknown knowns.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 16:05, Reply)

It might sound a bit clumsy at first, but it really is the simplest way of explaining the concept of information which you do and don't have. It's a shame that Rumsfeld got mocked as though he was the stupid one, when he was attempting to dumb it down for those very people who mocked him.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 16:11, Reply)

But it ain't necessarily so. But this is a bit stupid, but it doesn't make it wrong: en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_while_John_had_had_had_had_had_had_had_had_had_had_had_a_better_effect_on_the_teacher
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 16:16, Reply)

Buffalo buffalo buffalo ... etc.
(I'm not typing it all out on my phone).
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 16:35, Reply)

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lion-Eating_Poet_in_the_Stone_Den
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 16:47, Reply)

It's just a terrible, inadequate, slimy answer to the question he was given.
Rumsfeld had just said that intelligence showed that Iraq had actively worked on getting chemical weapons out to terrorists. That was support for why the US was actively planning to get involved in Iraq.
If someone then says "Does that evidence actually exist? What is it?"
It is not a good answer to say "There may be evidence out there that we don't know exists yet," when you're getting ready to invade a country.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 17:35, Reply)

but he says "our enemies dont stop thinking about new ways to harm our country or people...and neither do we" inferring the USA government is also trying to harm the USA and its citizens.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 15:51, Reply)

If you're going to defend yourself from a threat, you first have to think about that threat. So if you're enemies are thinking of ways to harm you, you should attempt to think of all those exact same ways to harm yourself so that you might be better able to defend yourself when it happens.
Certainly Bush said some daft things, and the way he said this was clumsy and open to ambiguous interpretation, but this isn't nearly as stupid as some people want to make out.
(And you mean "imply" not "infer".)
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 16:08, Reply)

Don't get me wrong, I think Bush was a bit of a buffoon, but that there were plenty of other better things to mock him for than one which requires willful misunderstanding on the part of the mocker.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 16:57, Reply)

While technically you are correct, given the context...
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 17:07, Reply)

Did he really say, "Thank you your holiness, awesome speech"
Class
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 15:01, Reply)

Terrible President though...such a puppet. Almost feel sorry for him.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 15:04, Reply)

Always struck me as a nasty, over-privileged spoilt brat who had everything handed to him on a plate & never required to actually engage his brain.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 15:11, Reply)

that is how i've always viewed the guy, which I always found to be acutely terrifying
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 15:14, Reply)

i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2014/04/03/article-2596199-1CCE372A00000578-123_634x658.jpg
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 15:14, Reply)

through all that he still believes that humans and pretzels can coexist peacefully.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 17:47, Reply)

which followed him whilst campaigning to be president for his first term. He came over as very charismatic and charming. Seriously!
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 15:15, Reply)

because he was a warm, charming, funny man who cared about the world (I'm paraphrasing here)
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 15:42, Reply)

The sandal-wearing, vegetable-rights-and-peace, tofu-bothering BASTARD.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 15:56, Reply)

( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 15:17, Reply)

Jesus women, have a word with yourselves.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 16:20, Reply)

A metal Christmas album...
www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/music/news/christopher-lee-releases-heavy-metal-christmas-song-darkest-carols-faithful-sing-9914850.html?cmpid=facebook-post
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 13:58, Reply)

Didn't he do this last year, or the year before? Does he have Alzheimers now?
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 14:24, Reply)

without doubt one of the most quotable films of my life. :D
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 14:10, Reply)

The great news is it also works in song format: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mkl9InsTrRQ
(See also: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KBlzybA1aP0)
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 14:51, Reply)

While you are at it Shed of the year 2015 is open for entry stick that in your newsletter or something, you could be on the telly, Channel4 Amazing Spaces next year - if you make the shed grade.
anyway some great sheds that are pubs have entered but here are just two


( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 13:56, Reply)

#5days left
can't remember which other board member is in the #5days left camp but its either fadge or happytoast although i could be completely wrong
anyway, this song is ace.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 13:34, Reply)

( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 15:34, Reply)

that seems a little bit weird
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 13:37, Reply)

Since he sacked all the real sub-eds the Heil has more typos than the Grauniad these days.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 14:06, Reply)

They should sack the editor in chief.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 16:23, Reply)

That's also an odd one. Can't really see where they're coming from. *cough*
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 13:56, Reply)

The scientific debate is still heated though. *coughing fit*
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 14:23, Reply)

Now I can PROVE that Chris Morris is writing real life!
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 15:06, Reply)

Achilles' Eel is back! Hooray! And this time he is making sure that the toast doesn't burn!
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 12:28, Reply)

he keeps saying it will all work out but it never does
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 13:37, Reply)

I think he should have popped the eel up his bumhole and farted him straight at the camera. Achilles would have been arrested but the LOLs would have been worth it.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 14:04, Reply)

of behind-the-scenes heroes to get a scream that long you know
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 17:59, Reply)

gawker.com/swiss-mcdonalds-treats-customers-to-free-side-of-softco-1669104072
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 12:10, Reply)

I thought this story had similarities with something else recently. Ace!
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 12:25, Reply)

How many people out there on receiving their discreetly packaged "BangKok Backdoor Bangers 3" feel terribly deflated
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 12:21, Reply)

Honestly. This country.
I mean... err... THAT country.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 12:22, Reply)

Oops.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 12:29, Reply)

So he watched it then.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 13:06, Reply)

( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 12:03, Reply)

( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 12:28, Reply)

or that these guys are very bad?
:D
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 13:52, Reply)

One for those of you who like seeing someone with a skill be awesome at it.
They're only down the road from me and really want a pair now.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 12:01, Reply)

to celebrate the arrival of by beautiful, shiny sharp scissors from Ernest Wright & Sons. It's only taken them about three months to ship (they took two years worth of orders in a single day when the video first came out). Lovely product, lovely people. So go and buy something that will last longer than you, but you have 0% chance of getting anything delivered before Christmas. I'm still waiting on another order I put in in September.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 14:13, Reply)

Nice film, but a silly price for a pair of scissors.
www.whiteley.co.uk/household_general_purpose_and_diy/1962ss85_kitchen_serrated_85_inch_P617.html
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 17:01, Reply)

....is a DJI Phantom and a million fairy lights
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 11:52, Reply)

Yeah I'm not really sure either, looks difficult!
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 11:13, Reply)

Also, "Football ping-pong", surely?
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 13:41, Reply)

Funnily enough, a mate and I were heading a ball to one another the other day.
I think our best was three in a row.
To be fair though he is the elephant man
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 13:46, Reply)

B3ta combined industries (lumpytuna and happytoast) bring you an exciting new way to be rude to someone over a hot beverage.


Decorate a Cappuccino with popular phrases like Cunt, Twat and Toss Pot, present it to your guests and laugh as they are deeply offended.
Or if you're feeling anarchic use them to create wonderous cake designs at your local village fete.
Feel free to suggest new designs, we've covered all the obvious swears and the obligatory Goatse, but there's plenty of room for more :D
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 11:10, Reply)

They'll be drinking a crudely drawn cock and never even know it.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 11:16, Reply)

I want some arrogant twat in the City of London to take the lid of his mocha to be greeted by the word 'Cunt,' and the Daily Mail to go ape shit, and the guilty employee to hold their hands up and say they it just couldn't be helped
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 11:33, Reply)

( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 11:25, Reply)

then the stars aligned and lumpytuna appeared like a magical craftsperson from the interwebs
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 11:29, Reply)

I think these are great. Another secret santa present sorted! Meaty Trumps' paedo top trumps won it for me earlier in the month.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 11:42, Reply)

Do they work on Pact coffee?
*edit* Oooh - you've already done a dog dirt one! Fantastic. Can I therefore change my suggestion to a picture of the prophet Muhammad?
Ta.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 12:29, Reply)

not burn down lumpytuna's studio offensive
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 12:46, Reply)

but UKIP?
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 13:21, Reply)

I always liked twunt!
and perhaps.. "dry shit sprinkles"... too long perhaps?
'hot piss'?
'slurry'
or perhaps
'spiked'
best of luck with it, the world needs more comedy swears. top skills!
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 14:00, Reply)

I mainly lurk ( OK, i'm a parasite) but these are great.
Link plastered all over t'web
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 16:16, Reply)

Daniel O'Reilly (...) was a comedian, pickup artist and a social media participant from Clapham Common.
Either that or someone's a bit heavy-handed with the past tense.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 10:49, Reply)

www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/tv/news/dapper-laughs-comedian-daniel-oreilly-to-retire-his-controversial-character-after-uk-tour-and-itv-shows-are-axed-9854890.html
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 10:54, Reply)

given a lot of blokes didn't realize it was a 'joke'
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 11:11, Reply)

maybe 6 or 7 vines
so not really positioned to comment. but when has that ever stopped anyone in the past?
so here goes. I reckon the joke was akin to Ali G but much less clever and funny. I could see who he was taking the piss out of. a misunderstanding along the lines of Al Murry Pub landlord from a few of his fans. I think he was making a joke about Ladbantz, it blew up and he got completely carried away by the adulation and attention. realised it was fucked up after a massive backlash and killed off the character and apologised.
he did get his balls quite rightly chewed off by Emily Matlis on Newsnight, which was the funniest thing I've seen of his work. but it seemed to me like his apology was sincere.
fucking lad bantz
i prefer teenthangz
or Teent Hangz as I prefer to think of it
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 14:09, Reply)

Struggling to look at the singer's face and enjoy the song but this channel is consistently great at covers
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 10:18, Reply)

Still free, still awesome.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 10:05, Reply)

( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 11:03, Reply)

Couple of things to note about this video, from the Police force in my home town.
1) They have time to make it, as nothing happens in Malvern, though it is the centre of the universe.
And more importantly **SPOILER ALERT**
2) They have TWO dog costumes.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 9:39, Reply)

The first thing the dogs would've done is sniff each other's arses.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 9:44, Reply)

I'ld say pull up a kitten but we're a bit short right now.
Would a goat be ok?
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 10:36, Reply)

Should be available later today.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 10:49, Reply)

At the end of this advert it says 'look after yourself this Christmas'. Isn't that what the police get paid for?
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 9:46, Reply)

Personally responsibility for your own safety is needed.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 10:03, Reply)

Malvern Link can be a bit hairy at times
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 11:29, Reply)

Dodgy part of town. Closest they get to it in this clip is the park.
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 15:53, Reply)

to projectile shit out this christmas
( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 9:53, Reply)

( , Wed 10 Dec 2014, 10:20, Reply)
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