The mouldy weed conversation has reminded me of a time in Center Parcs
where we ran out of Rizla and wanted to get high so much that we resorted to skinning up using receipts. Tasted foul and produced a bright blue flame. What's the lowest you've sunk to get wasted before?

Alt Q: What's your drug of choice? be it booze, weed whatever?

EXCITING DRUG THREAD ALERT
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 11:22, 199 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

For Labia
New thread.

Q: What do you feel like complaining today? My train broke down on the way to work and I lost a whole hour of my very busy life.

AltQ: Why are you happy today? Remember that problem at work that was going to be solved with the help of an expert? I solved it yesterday, all by myself. I'm feeling proud and happy.

EDIT: And oh, yes, I'm on holidays from tomorrow!!
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 25 Aug 2010, 10:17, 224 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Morning, cunts.
Nice to see the Metro restaurant critic has also observed what I've been saying for fucking ages: that fat greengrocer Gregg (sic) Wallace from Masterchef simply repeats what his (actual chef) colleague says, for a living. In that respect (and I would imagine few others) he is like Sen Dog from Cypress Hill, who I always felt had the easiest job in hip hop.

Who do you feel in the public domain is the worst culprit for getting paid vast sums in exchange for doing FUCK ALL? I can tell you from personal experience that Ed Simons from The Chemical Brothers contributes almost nothing to their act, but he only gets paid 20% to Tom Rowlands' 80%.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 8:42, 85 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

If you were forced to go on one 'reality' television shows
Which one would you go on and why?

Alt Q: Who would you most like to get pissed with?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 19:05, 94 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

For the football fans: Hilarious.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=VLHDzqTKajM

NSFW - cause of bad language.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 18:22, 4 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

New thread not about sweets or old ladies' minges.
What (if anything) would you like to know about me? I am not promising to answer.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 15:31, 320 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Confectionary Pigmentation
Are purple sweets are better then all other coloured sweets?

Are green coloured sweets the worst?
(Psymon_Spark Jesus Saves! The rest of you take 4d6 damage, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 14:04, 173 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Reinventing the news.
I'm watching the lunchtime news and they've just shown the story of the women who put a cat in a wheelie bin. They prefaced this story with "some viewers may find this distressing".

FFS! It's the news! I've just watched the horrific headlines on the Claudy bombing and heard the reports of the thousands displaced and dead in Pakistan, neither of which had the warning "some viewers may find this distressing" even though they involved actual people and not just a pet favoured by emotionally stunted people.

I appeal once again for a channel of rolling fluffy good news involving penguins - mainly penguins, video footage of penguins, and maybe a puppy, or a puppy rescuing a penguin. Something like that.

What would you like to see on the news?
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 13:29, 208 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

DING
This morning I was really motivated I did loads of work, had a smile... but since about 1130 I've lost all motivation and thought fuck it.

How's your motivation today?
Alternatively let's talk about sex lunch. I had a ham roll it was dull I am going out at lunchtime to find chocolate
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 12:31, 139 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Right, what's been happening while I've been away?
I'd like to think I was missed, but I'm sure I wasn't.
A question for JohnTheDane (or DiT, seeing as he is actually a person and a Danish one at that): If the usually cheerful Danes are prone to suddenly shout "NO PHOTOS!" when I take innocent snaps of croissants, yet will happily FILM innocent people having a little snog, then what is wrong with the world?

Alt q: Denmark or Sweden?

EDIT: Sorry BoabyPires
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:41, 234 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I am going to a wedding this weekend where I have spectacularly fallen out with a couple of the guests.
I can already see there being confrontation with one of them however my question is this. Should I get blind drunk and just see what happens or should I avoid excess boozing and ensure Becca and Rob's wedding day isn't spoilt by shouty men.

Alt Q? what wedding shenanigans have you witnessed in the past?
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 10:37, 66 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Oh my! I'm so tired!
Today is the 2nd day of 3days working 10h, plus 4 for commuting. I'm shattered. On top of that, on Sunday night (Monday? 3am) I couldn't sleep as I thought there was a pipe broken on the flat and I had to check everywhere. And yesterday night I had a lot of weird dreams, very confussing and stressing. And Darth was there offering to teach me how to smoke marihuana to help me relax...

I hope I won't fall asleep on my desk.

So, did you have a good night? Are you expecting a exciting day for today?

Ah, and for those of you who care, my cousin dumped her (not his, sorry I had it wrong) boyfriend on Sat.

EDIT: I just got this and thought it could make your day happier : quotable-beck.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/04AUS-30201-Wombat-large.jpg
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 24 Aug 2010, 7:59, 63 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

What fresh hell is this?

(Falstaff's Spiritual Successor, Tue 24 Aug 2010, 0:28, 1 reply, 16 years ago)

The power's out here...
Has been for nearly an hour and a half. Can't even read a book, the only light I have is candles, and the only way I could get them somewhere to provide light to read by would set my hair alight...
As my phone battery steadily dies, suggest things I could do to be less bored
( Tedium Alduce me to interlow myself., Mon 23 Aug 2010, 22:53, 4 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Right.
Which one of you was this?
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 19:34, 23 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I am looking after an infant this evening. He is my nephew he is 19 months old.
Any suggestions? Unfortunately he isn't old enough to learn street fighter or fifa yet.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 18:51, 16 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

We-buy-and-car
dot-com.

The jingle is going round and round my head. Please, someone, make it stop.

Alt Q: I'm having steak for dinner - but I can't make my mind up what to have with it. I don't much fancy chips. What is the best steak meal combination?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 17:38, 109 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Cake
Discuss
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 16:31, 159 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

A challenge to you
I want you to tell me about something important that you actually care about and are prepared to defend.

I'm sick of the chippy handwringing on this website, I want a bit more from you.

Do not reply to this message to describe something you don't like, I'm not interested in how much you hate something.
( WormuIus, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 15:10, 279 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Hurrah
The window/roof behind me is leaking so now I get to listen to

DRIP DRIP DRIP DRIPDRIP DRIP DRIP DRIP DRIP

What's made you homicidal today?
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 14:23, 103 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Liam Fox is a twat
www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-11056581

:edit: I don't give a shit about the videogame; I dislike his implication that it's not "acceptable to recreate the acts of the Taliban against British soldiers" but vice versa is fine.
( Captain V, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:57, 85 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Yay and hurrah! A fireman is coming to sort out the smoke alarm with 2 hours.
I asked for a pretty one and the woman giggled, so I'll probably get a 20 stone scary cunt called Bob who'll ask me if I've tried turning it off and on again.

What visitors are you expecting in the near future?

Alt Q: what colour are your pants today and can they be seen if you stand on a chair?
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:32, 103 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Hello Internet Forum
Do you hate Cats? If so, why?

If not, why did she leave you?
(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:31, 27 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Yesterday, I visited Catface and Crackhouse and met Baby Crackface.
She's properly brilliant, if only because she frowns all the time.
I think she will grow up to be a serial killer and start with her dad.

Who will you start with?
( thealternativefact, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 11:23, 158 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Victory from the jaws of defeat.
I’ve just spent the past hour panic-strickenly hoping to God that an 8am £27 bid I made on a record on Ebay was going to be outbid, because I have found it on Netsounds for £15.75 (no-one else would be likely to find it as the listing was misspelled). It’s worth £35+.

For once in my life fortune smiled on me. The poor sod I was in a bidding war with still got an OK price but I’ve got what I wanted for half the money.

Q: is this the most boring post in B3ta history?
Alt Q: ever got away with something when it looked like you’d really fucked up?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 9:59, 103 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Goooood Morning B3taland!
And why the fuck are you up this early?

Buggered if I know!

Alt Q: How do you eat your Jelly Babies?
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Mon 23 Aug 2010, 8:18, 105 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Alright people? How's it going?
Everything is going all hunky-dorry here, extra hunky, if you know what I mean *wets fingers, smothes down eyebrows, wink'n'finger guns*.

I watched the first of that "Our Drugs War" show on C4, and half the second one. It's made me think twice about what I was talking about before with my view on drugs. Don't get me wrong, I still think they can be Really Really Bad News™, donno the awnser, but maybe banning them out-right isn't the solution. I'm not sure what is, especially when you transend from recreational usage to treating addiction.

Anyway, alright?


* Those fabulous enough to know that move; well, erm, err, know that patented move of mine..... fuck it, alt q: What's your patented smooth-move?
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sun 22 Aug 2010, 19:19, 35 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

The obligatory Saturday thread!
Hope everyone is having a great weekend. We've got a heatwave going on, and it's humid as all hell. Likely to have thunderstorms later.

And we've set the date.....June 25th, 2011.
And it looks like I'll be back in the UK around the end of September to follow up on my previous trip. This time, I'm taking vacation and bringing Crystal with me.
(nolongernuts, Sat 21 Aug 2010, 23:47, 7 replies, latest was 16 years ago)