Lunch anyone?
If you were off looting where would be your first port of call?
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 12:28, 274 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

New thread time
Tell me about criminal activity you have engaged in, from MD's to petty vandalism.

Alt: Gym at lunch or wander around Ealing to look at the damage?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 10:43, 236 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Riots, shmiots.
Bored to tears already by hysterical gibbering about what is little more than a mass shoplifting spree. Ken Livingstone showed himself for the grubby little turd he is on the BBC news channel last night when he turned his grating, nasal tones to tawdry party-political point-scoring and was actually told off by the correspondent for it which I thought was great. 'Perhaps this isn't the time, Ken'. The vile little man whining on about how when HE was mayor etc. He's a big a self-serving opportunist as de yout' man dem in Curry's.

Tune of the day:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=AqQRtzU5Bsw

Question: how the devil are you?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 8:38, 256 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Obvious thread is obvious
How would YOU deal with the rioters, B3ta? In homage to the top-notch Zombie Big Brother series Dead Set from a couple of years back, I say the police go for headshots (double tap, obv) just in case.

Alt: London, Birmingham, Bristol and now Nottingham (although apparently it was a riot in the St Anns area, which is just a Monday night there). Where's next? My money's on Manchester, not that anyone will notice the difference.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 8:35, 21 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Barry's frontline report.
I saw a million and one things down in old Croydon. Very moody, very scary. But also quite funny. Don't condone what went on for one second but I can't deny some things weren't amusing. Saw a bod legging it down the road carrying a 32" tele on his head, not a flatscreen, but one of the old ones that goes about two foot back. There was loads but I'm knackered cos I had to run away from various hoodlums. Worth it though.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 0:11, 13 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

London Riot thread: Not a threadstomp just let it run in parallel to keep this shit out of other threads.
London B3tans:

Monty: Last seen runing for his home like a North London Ponce Monty's place looted! RIOTERS ON MASSIVE DRUGS!!!!
Barry: Going Looting Has looted a smart phone and is posting from the front lines Waiting for the choppers to come and get him the hell out of this. " Suicidal? Probably. Idiotic? Definitely. Fuck it, you live once. Tally ho ladies and gents." a fitting epitaph.
Stunned: Lives in Lewisham, nothing heard, presumed dead
Swipe: No news, but she'll live some where posh so presumed safe
Lampers: OK, but preparing to flee if shit gets hot Armed with a footlong screwdriver and preparing to see off looters.
Me: Sitting in an eerily calm bit between 2 'troubled' areas and bricking myself
Gonz: Shouting Insults from his window at rioters
Edit:
Rory: Who knows, presumed hoped dead Alive and talking shit as usual.
More edit:
TGB, see Gonz, presumed alive
Wookie: Haven't a clue presumed looting in a pub, and not looting at all
Still more edit:
Crow: in a "safe" area, presumed OK. was kicked out of a pub due to reports of rioting around Clapham/Vauxhall. He's home safe though.
Even more edit:
Barry's mate: blockaded in a pub in Croydon, re-enacting Shaun of the Dead, presumed fucked.
International Edit:
Kristine is in America and she's okay. She's even chewing gum!

Who did I miss?

Latest from New Cross:
8:28 3 more riot vans heading to Lewisham
8:45 Ken Livingstone on the BBC speaking sense. Long Live Red Ken.
8:55 Ambulance heading for Lewisham. *sad face*
10:20 definitely more ambulances than police vans heading for Lewisham in the last hours. still quiet here.
10:30 ambulances and police vans heading back from Lewisham
10:50 Going by the directions of the passing Plods, I'd say it's quieting down in Lewisham and getting worse up towards Walworth Road, will be interested to see if this is true come the morning, especially as that is my route to work.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 8 Aug 2011, 20:00, 341 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

I've bitten the bullet and called where I used to work, they're hiring, and I'm going to go apply tonight.
Is money more important than being happy?

alt: give us a song
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ofbiKzpPPFg&feature=related
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 19:10, 84 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

It's not even five o'clock, it can't be dead yet.
Inspired by our own Foxtrot and blatantly pimped here.

How are you with computers? Are you like that guy in Swordfish who can hack into a mainframe while having a gun pointed at his head and his cock gobbled? Or are you just about ok with posting on here and get sucked in by Facebook viruses?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 16:29, 187 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

So apart from a load of poor Londoners trying to take stuff that doesn't belong to them
the world is also suffering a bit of a financial calamity, what with the US no longer considered to be a AAA rated credit risk.

So, in honour of that, is it acceptable to double dip your tortilla chips (or quail stuffed vol-o-vents if your nouveau rich like swipey, or hand made oven baked cheese twists if you're pretentious like Vipros)?
(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 14:50, 200 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Dogs and babies
The in-laws have a dog who they absolutely dote over and treat like a child now that their own kids are grown up and moved out. They now have a brand new grandchild, their first, and frankly they seem unconcerned about the dog's behaviour around the kid. The dog doesn't respond to training (when first acquired, hubby took the time to take it to doggy school but his olds did nothing to reinforce it) so it won't even sit or stay when told, and it gets very 'excited' when the baby gets brought in the house. They've now refused to put the dog outside or keep it on a leash as 'it will only get upset and resent the baby'. WTF.
Having had a polite discussion they agreed to leash it on us visiting, but when we went over they took the leash out and then left it sitting on the bookshelf. Again, WTF. It feels like they're choosing the dog over their grandchild and frankly, dear reader, i've fucking had enough. Why should i feel anxious everytime we visit them, and then be made to feel guilty when we don't go and visit? My job as a mother is to protect my baby, and they're hamstringing me by making snide remarks about my concerns.

Is there any suggestions how to broach / resolve this situation once and for all cause this is causing serious shit in a normally happy situation.
( Tiffany Aching 's bowl of oatmeal tried to stare her down and won, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 13:34, 209 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

That thread is pretty pap, sorry al.
Have you ever been in a riot? Would you particpate? what causes would you demonstrate/riot for?

Alt: Sexiest politician? I vote for Louise Mench
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 12:07, 103 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Yeah, fuck that.
I've just had a look on Facebook and I think there are pictures of Berk and her boyfriend dancing at a wedding. They look very cute.

But sadly he appears to be ginger.

How would you best tell someone you like that they should dump their partner because of the colour of their hair?
(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 10:58, 103 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

A Small Victory
...once sang Faith No More. This weekend I've kicked the arse out of a very difficult upgrade for a customer, got a free Indian takeaway, sold lots of shit I didn't want on eBay and had excellent ice-cream. What small victories have you had this weekend?


Alt:
Cockerney thieving gets or what?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 8:58, 193 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Let's talk about the oldest profession there is, prostitution.
What are your thoughts people? I have some friends who think it's abhorrent and others who regularly get involved.

Alt: Best sunday evening dinner? Not roast as that should be had at lunchtime not in the evening.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 7 Aug 2011, 18:41, 127 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I have no idea why I'm up so early on a Sunday
What are Sundays for, anyway?

Alt: What's your favourite episode of your favourite TV programme?
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Sun 7 Aug 2011, 8:37, 43 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Out or in tonight people?
Poker or pub? you decide.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sat 6 Aug 2011, 17:36, 93 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

why are you cunts asleep when I'm awake and bored?
it's bullshit
you ought to try harder

yes i'm selfish, we all know that
( Lisette von Falcon, Sat 6 Aug 2011, 5:06, 14 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Any demand for a Friday evening thread?
I expect not, but don't knock me for trying.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Fri 5 Aug 2011, 19:24, 98 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

FUCK YEAH !
Some of you know about some stuff I've been moaning about since mid dec with a treatment that I've been waiting funding for.... Well, 10 minutes ago I got, and on tuesday I'll get the double-dose of stuff that should hopefully fix me for 2 months, AND THEN, in two month's time, I'll get it again.... and if that does fix me, then we have a case to get it permantly. But even if not, I should have a good 4 months of being well. OH BOY. YAY FOR BEING FIXED
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 5 Aug 2011, 17:14, 53 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

New thread
So todays market volitility and general spazzing by brokers all over the world has reminded me of the SEMINAL Film Trading Places, and makes me want to watch it.

What other films should I watch. This thread is about Film, which I'm really into.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 5 Aug 2011, 15:02, 108 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Why not tell the group about the lol-packed weekend you have planned?
Alt: which famous person, alive or dead, do you most wish was an /OT regular?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Aug 2011, 13:46, 144 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

That thread has reached Pun Com 3.
We're going to need another thread.

So, make yourself comfortable on the couch and tell me about your mother

*steeples fingers*
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 5 Aug 2011, 12:13, 132 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

'Idea for a series....'
In the spirit of Alan Partridge, let's hear your ideas for television or radio programmes.

A friend of mine was going to set up an internet radio station thing for Shoreditch and I was going to be on it. My idea was to host a show called ‘Mock The Weak’ where I play a well-known record, take it apart mercilessly and explain in detail why I think it’s shit, and then follow this by playing a comparable but superior platter and explain why I think it’s better.

It never happened, though.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Aug 2011, 10:01, 216 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Hello my lovelies!
Morning has broken, like the first morning
Blackbird has spoken, like the first bird
Praise for the singing, praise for the morning
Praise for the springing fresh from the word

Don't know why I'm in a good mood but I am. Make use of it how you will.

What do I have to do to get you lot as content as me today?
( girlinthehole, Fri 5 Aug 2011, 8:04, 200 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

As I mature and near 30 I have begun to think about things I like.
I have decided, after great consideration, that Blood Sugar Sex Magik is my favourite ever album.

What are some of your favourites?
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 23:24, 43 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

fuck that shit
Water on mars people check the news
(PsychoChomp, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 19:26, 103 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

A client has just fakkin mugged me off
When were you last fucked over?

ALT: I bought a fillet of beef to make beef wellington tomorrow, fuck me it was expensive. What expensive foodstuffs do you love or when is the cheapy option best.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 17:10, 74 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Enemas
what are they all about then?

alt: Just natter, that love in below is making me feel sick.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 15:23, 163 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Friends (cue cheesy nineties theme music)
How many B3tans do you consider friends? As opposed to internet acquaintances/cunts? Name and shame, see who feels the same about you, apologise profusely when those who slipped your mind throw a hefty.

Alt: best swearwords.

Alt alt: biggest cunt on B3ta. Met or otherwise. Met preferable, as long as juicy evidence comes attached.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 14:31, 162 replies, latest was 15 years ago)